Who else is a first timer?

[cholderby]

I LOVE that there are so many experienced moms 'round these parts, espescially since I am the first of my friends to get pregnant! But I wondered who else was a first timer and where you stand as far as "baby preparations".
I'm a very Type A planner sort, so I like to do everything far ahead of time (and then obsess about details). I still haven't registered for any brith prep classes (or even dcided on any) or hired a doula (which I do want to do).
I was also wondering where you are going to register? We have such a great and supportive (and large) family, so I know there will be a shower (I think its already being planned) but where can I register for stuff like cloth diapers and slings and cosleepers? And how are you deciding with the myriad of choices out there?

[simplehome]

I'm a first-timer, too. I'm not really doing much as far as planning right now-I figure there's a long time left. I have reserved a spot in a birth prep class, though. The biggest thing that I'm doing is going through all of the stuff in our two extra bedrooms (one is currently my office-I work at home-the other is a guest room) and getting rid of all of the crap. We're planinng on consolidating the office and the guest room (since I hardly use the office anymore, now that I have a laptop), and making the current office the child's room, eventually. It'll really be more of a storage room for their clothes at first, since they'll be sleeping with us. I just want to get it all sorted out now, though, while I have the time and energy, so that it doesn't have to come later when we have a toddler running around and MORE stuff in the house.

As for registering, I don't think I'm really going to register anywhere. I know that there are people who will want to buy us gifts, but I just don't think we're going to need very much at first, and there just don't seem to be stores that carry everything that we will want. One thing my sister did is set up a webpage for those who are interested in buying them a gift, and it has descriptions to things that they'd like to get, along with links to websites where those things can be purchased. It also has links to several websites where a gift certificate would be appreciated, like in the case of a custom sling order. She just has my mother "administering" it, so that when someone buys something off of the list, they email my mother, and she crosses it off the list. It is somewhat cumbersome, but it seems to be working pretty well. This way you can get the cloth diapers you want, the sling, etc., but also can leave some things up to the individual. For instance, if you know you'd like some terry/flannel wipes, but don't care what they look like, comeone could have fun going through several websites and picking out the ones that they think are the cutest rather than just clicking "buy" on a registry.

I'm sure that I'll probably have a shower, but I think that it'll probably be a homemade frozen meal shower, in order to stock us up with food for when the baby arrives. Our immediate family members will probably buy gifts anyway, so I'll probably set up a "wish-list" like my sister has in order to direct any gift purchases towards things we might actually use.

As far as deciding....whew! It is nice that my sister is going through this before me, as are a few friends of mine with similar notions for how they'd like to raise their children. This means a few things-I'll get hand-me-down diapers for the smaller sizes, which will be GREAT, and I'll get to see what kinds of things work for them....my husband and I are still trying to figure out several sleeping options that will work for us, but I think this will probably be something we just have to figure out once the baby is here. We have a full-size bed, and don't really want to buy a bigger one, although it would be nice....so right now we're thinking of doing a crib side-carred to the bed for a while, to see how that works. However, I just REALLY don't want to buy a crib! It seems like such a huge expense, and we both feel like we don't REALLY need it...but it is cheaper than a new bed for us. A friend of mine used a co-sleeper, and while a lot of people swear by them, she could never get her baby to be happy in it. He just wanted to snuggle up with her, of course. We might try borrowing it from her, if she hasn't sold it yet, but I don't have high hopes for it, either. I like that a side-carred crib provides a little more space, but all on the same level surface.

The only thing I can't figure out is what about the space along the side of the bed that the crib doesn't cover? Has anyone's child wiggled up or down the bed to the point that they fell out with this kind of side-car arrangement? Our bed is very low to the ground, but I'm sure it would still hurt. Any advice would be appreciated!

Okay, I've babbled on for long enough....
Those are just my thoughts! It's good to have such a diverse body of experiences here!

[MamaSpruce]

And I'm so excited, of course. Too busy planning my wedding which is in less than 3 weeks right now, trying to hold back on baby planning too much. Luckily that was mostly planned before we found out baby was coming so soon. Have our midwife picked though, and birth place--at home. Been looking at diapers a bit, there are so many choices, yikes! We're thinking about a king bed, getting our things organized and cleaned out a bit too.

Oh, as for registry, felicite.com is nice because you can register for anything at any site. We're using it for our wedding. People can partial pay for bigger things too.

[cholderby]

Props to you for being able to handle all this PLUS a wedding!

I know for a fact that I couldn't do it. Actually, I have been feeling very thankful lately that the wedding is over and I never have to think of it again (a great sentiment for "the happiest day of your life", right?). My in-laws kind of turned it into a giant lawyer convention full of people I don't know, so I'm sure yours won't be nearly as stressful (at least I hope so).

[MamaSpruce]

Thanks, its not too tough. I didn't have much of a choice, as the invites went out before we found out about the baby. But I feel sooooo blessed with a very easy first trimester, and that has helped a lot. Also, it will be a very simple affair. Sorry yours was not all fond memories. At least its the marriage that really matters though. Both sets of folks are being really awesome about letting this be just the way we want it, and it helps that they are all out of town! Sad for baby though, maybe they'll move closer...

I think there are more first timers out there. Looking forward to this thread. I still don't quite feel pregnant yet. It's hard to believe until I feel it and get a little bigger I think. I would imagine that is probably especially true for us first timers. Can't wait until the first kick!

Smiles, Shannon

[Fig]

Hey there,

Yup, another first timer. I am in the process of meeting with docs, midwives and such. Still haven't decided the ultimate plan, just figuring out what is covered by insurance is confusing enough. I am trying to remain open and not set myself up for too many expectations at this point.

As for registering, I think the only thing I am really gonna ask for is cloth diapers as it is an expensive set up and you need so many. Other than that I am also hoping for a frozen meal party for the first weeks worth of dinners.

The big amount of work is coming from trying to make our small office/guest room/music room into a baby room as well, ha-ha.Our house is tiny! I'm sure we can make do though.
It is all an amazing journey.

[sprinkle pocket]

another first timer here (that doesn't get much time to post or lurk these days)...we knew we wanted a up/uc before we conceived, so that's taken care of, just spending time learning and listening.
we're not registering. if il's friends want to buy stuff we'll just let them know of options that we feel strongly about like keeping clothing to organic cotton/hemp/wool/2nd hand with no fire retardent. and let them know of bigger stuff like sling/carrier etc if we haven't gotten them yet. we're keeping it rather simple, no bells and whistles in our home...no high chairs, rockers, cribs, saucers, playpens, strollers, pumps, bottles, plastic crap, kiddie fences, etc...just a baby and cloth diapers (though we're using ec as much as we can) full breasts and lots and lots of love and snuggles. even if we had the physical space in our life for it, it's just not our style.

the closest we're coming to a prenatal class is yoga class followed by amazing food at our local organic/veg restaurant.

sorry, i can't give you ideas, i'm sure there are other mama's out there that will be better able to share ideas along the lines of what you were thinking! :lol

[Jill2003]

I'm a first timer as well and new to this board too! I am a real compulsive planner so I have many things planned out already. Unfortunately we had a few losses in the last year, so I have been planning for a while now. Thankfully this pregnancy is going great so it looks like I will finally be able to put my plans to use! I have been seeing a midwife for the last few months, as well as an ob/gyn. Since I had a couple of miscarriages I saw the ob/gyn for the first three months. But now that we're in the clear, I'm just with the midwife.

As for registering I have registered at Sears (we're in Canada so that's the easiest registry). But the registry is mostly for me to keep track of what I would like to get. Since this is the first grandchild, most of the bigger things like furniture and stroller will be purchased by family. In fact, most of our family has already discussed that type of thing with us. We are very fortunate that way and it looks like we will only have to purchase the less expensive things.

I haven't been overwhelmed with many choices yet in terms of baby stuff, since I've been looking at things for over a year now. I would like to use cloth diapers so I do need to research that more.

Kerry
edd March 11

[CyndiN]

This is my first pregnancy ever. I'm glad to see others planning babies and weddings at the same time. My committment-phobic partner could only deal with one thing at a time and, given my age, it was the pregnancy I really cared about. After a year of fruitless trying, he finally proposed and we set a date for Aug 2005. Two weeks later, I got a line on the pregnancy test. So we're really doing both at once. It's ummm fun. LOL

[carlasher]

Well, I am anything but "type A". I have ADD so I hardly plan and obsess over anything. I am not orgainzed either. As far as having "suff", I dont have anything yet, though we have an idea of what we want/need. No birth classes or anything yet. I am in a prenatal Yoga class now though We wont have a shower, and I probably wont register (whats the point?)

Most things will be get will be from consignment and used from Craigslist and UC Berkeley Parents Newsletter. I dont see any point in buying new for baby (except for carseats and other things that safety may be compermised). Since we live in a apt, unless we move to a house, I am going to use diaper service. Our laundry is downstairs, and outside, top loading washers, etc.

I have been job searching for 10 months now so I have REALLY been into that a lot lately. I think I am going to cool off though because I am now showing and doubt anyone will hire me. I am just glad to have this time to prepare now. We live in a small (but beautful) one bedroom apt, so we may move, but we are not sure yet.

[cholderby]

Good luck on the job search!

Have you looked at your local freecycle? There have been some breast pumps on mine and other pricey baby stuff that people are giving away for free. I bet SF has to have a huge board.

[carlasher]

Thanks! I am on my local freecycle, but not a lot of baby stuff comes though. Just a lot of things we wont need. But I do keep my eye out though.

Good luck on the job search!

Have you looked at your local freecycle? There have been some breast pumps on mine and other pricey baby stuff that people are giving away for free. I bet SF has to have a huge board.

[cholderby]

Are you guys taking any classes yet?

I know carlasher said something about a yoga class. I just started a yoga/bellydancing sort of class myself, on Monday (its called MamaTone, but I don't know if its national or not).

I would really like to take a Bradley class too, but DH's schedule wouldn't allow him to attend more than one. My MW's office has a one day Saturday class that I think we will take. And I really want to find a breastfeeding class but I haven't decided on one yet.

I think I'd like to take an infant CPR class too, just for the peace of mind. I'm a little bit of a worrier by nature and I think that might help me relax.

[MamaSpruce]

I'm taking a mama yoga class once a week. Having already practiced, I wish it was a little more active, but just relaxing surrounded by all those beautiful bellies is so nice! Mama Tone sounds nice, I've never heard of it. I did a little belly dance before pregnancy and have thought of going back...

Other than that I think I'll just take my midwife's 4(6?) week class. I might look into Bradley or hypno-birthing. And I had thought to take infant CPR too, thanks for the reminder!

[aquarianmom]

My first too!

On the subject of preparing, have any of you received that book: A Girlfriend's Guide to Baby Gear, from well meaning friends/relatives? I just really don't want all that STUFF. So I am rebelling and not asking or registering at the moment. We tried that for our wedding and unfortunately it did not work. Someone(I think my mother in law) registered for us and we ended up with a bunch of very fancy serving dishes for our cabin in the woods. hah So I suppose I might really get into it once we get a little closer. I hear a very strong nesting urge comes on and causes women in thier 9th month to do crazy things like drywalling and moving heavy furniture. Truth be told I am very curious about all of the different types of slings.

The prenatal yoga was a little too mellow for me right now so I am just doing lots of deep squats along with my usual yoga practice. Oh, and lots of feeling my belly in amazement!

[Finnsma]

:LOL Not a first timer here but your reference to doing crazy nesting things got my remembering and laughing. With my first I was on bedrest for 5 months because of high blood pressure that eventually turn pre-e. So I'm nesting like crazy only can't really nest cause I'm stuck on the couch. So I sat myself in my rolling office chair and rolled myself all over cleaning and organizing as much as I could, while checking my bp every 10 mins or so. :eyesroll I dusted, wiped and alphabatized our once huge movie collection. I bleached the front door?! and various other weird things that I could reach while in my chair. LOL

I'm sure come Feb/March we'll have a thread telling of all the crazy nesting things we're doing! :LOL

[cholderby]

My first too!

On the subject of preparing, have any of you received that book: A Girlfriend's Guide to Baby Gear, from well meaning friends/relatives? I just really don't want all that STUFF. So I am rebelling and not asking or registering at the moment.

I am reading a book called something like Confessions of a Slacker Mom right now. Its meant to be humerous but she really points out that really all you need is a car seat (and that's only if you have a car). Its a great way to counteract all those "stuff" books.

Save me from the batteries!!!

[mommy2b]

cholderby,

I am very much like you a "type a" planner,obsessor and first timer. I have registered at Babiesrus and Target. A couple of my friends just had babies, so I took their advice (as well as the reviews people put on the babiesrus and target websites),as to what items to select. One of my friends is really big on reasearch, as am I, but since she had a baby first, I didn't have to do all of the work.

As far as classes. We have taken one class that tells us what to expect during pregnancy, changes, etc. We have also toured the hospital we will be delivering at. We have Lamaze scheduled in January (I'm 19 weeks and 1 day). We have not scheduled yet but will take classes in the following: breastfeeding, child safety (CPR), car seat installation, massage (for baby and mommy during labor), and baby preperation (how to change diapers, burp,position baby for sleep, etc). All of these classes are offered by the hospital, some are free, some have a charge. The most expensie was the Lamaze, $95.

We have picked out everything for the nursery. The only thing I haven't figured out, is when I'm going back to work. I just got a really good job since being pregnant and want to develope a career at this place. I think I will work part-time for awhile after our baby is born.

Congratulations to everyone out there. Wishing you all the best!!!

[cholderby]

mommy2b -

Did your friends have a good experience registering at Target? I was all set to register there but Baby Bargains scared me away.