so.. what's the bad stuff about montessory?

[loving-my-babies]

I read all the waldorf threads, and saw the good and the bad.. now, I didn't see the bad stuff about montessory. I want to know what you DON'T OR DIDN'T like about montessory, not comparing to waldorf neccesarily like the waldorf vs. montessory thread, but just the things you don't like. I am looking for a pre-school for my dd, now 3 years old.

thanks!

[AnnR33]

My son went to preschool last year at a great Montessori. I really had no big complaints about our personal experience and my son really excelled there in ways that I really didn't expect. he was writing his name after only a month when they used the sensory lessons and he was picking up things that I could not interest him in at home.
That said, I think it all depends on the individual school. While there are overriding Montesssori principles/philospophies that should be followed, each school is different and some are more rigid with these and some more flexible.
The main thing I wish was more flexible was the "real" vs pretend aspect. Everything is real life and practical. While I appreciate this to a point I also think that kids should "play" and use their imagination without being told that "it's not real." This happened a few times with my son and it was difficult to know where to draw the line-after all-I want my son be creative and use his imagination. My son did compain once in while that there were no toys. I think some toys are useful in teaching but you won't find any in a "true" Montessori.
One thing to be aware of is that the kids are left to pick their own lessons for the majority of the time-this is fine for some kids that want to complete something and move on but I observed more than once a child doing a lesson then just sitting with it and looking around or just sitting there for 30 minutes! This didn't seem very productive/learning to me. I did mention this to the teacher and she said they try to redirect kids when they see this but with 20 kids and 2 teachers it does happen sometimes....
Anyway, just be sure to ask lots of questions and observe a class in action before deciding!
Good luck
Ann

[loving-my-babies]

mm.. see, I would like my dd to use her imagination *a lot*.

I think I will have to watch a class before I decide, but I heard the same thing a couple times, about them being too strict about "real" and "practical"

[AnnR33]

That really was the main complaint I have. My son is very imaginative and is quite the story teller. He makes up names for things and has an imaginary "big sister" that he talks about a lot. At school the other kids would get in arguements with him and say "that's not real." The teacher asked me after about 4 mos how much we remind him of what's real vs imaginary and we said we didn't think too much about it at age 5. We just let him be creative and even add to the stories ourselves. She said this may be something we start to think about changing but we just said thanks but we were happy with his way of thinking right now. I think she respected that even if she didn't agree with it.
If he went everyday all day I might have thought more about this but my son only went 3 afternoons a week for 2.5 hrs so he still got lots of playtime at home where he could tell all the stories he wanted. This short time each week was a nice change for him I think to get a more structured way of learning without it being overwhelming or stiffling. But that was just my child, some other child may love it every day...
Ann

[CraftyMommaOf2]

The imagination vs reality issue is kind of a sensitive spot for ppl that have actually read Maria Montessori's works, etc. I think alot of the schools take it waaaaay to far. MM (Maria Montessori) actually said that children need play time and they need to use their imagination. The casas that she started were in the slums of Italy. The poor kids there needed the reality part as they were always using their imaginations. They had no toys etc and were used to pretending for everything. It's not like that today. Anyways...sorry for the ramble...minor pet peeve. I would say to make sure that you observe any school you are considering. Talk to the parents, teachers, find out when the next parents night is and go hang out. HTH some :LOL

[lauren]

I don't have direct experience with Montessori, but from my knowledge of child development, I believe it is part of a child's development that they gradually begin to know what's real and what's pretend, not something we need to teach them necessarily (excpet for reassuring them that there is NOT a real monster in the closet!!) I would take exception to stressing this with children purely on a developmental basis--they need their imaginative world when they are little--it's how they make sense of things in their own way. Things get more real for them when they are developmentally ready, usually around 6 or 7.

[thyme]

The one problem with Montessori is that anyone can use that name -- Maria Montessori didn't trademark or copyright or whatever, so anyone opening a school can call it a Montessori school even if the philosophies aren't even close to "Montessori."

You really have to research each individual school thoroughly. Anything anyone says here about Montessori may or may not hold true for your school. It makes it difficult to get good information.

[loving-my-babies]

The one problem with Montessori is that anyone can use that name -- Maria Montessori didn't trademark or copyright or whatever, so anyone opening a school can call it a Montessori school even if the philosophies aren't even close to "Montessori."

You really have to research each individual school thoroughly. Anything anyone says here about Montessori may or may not hold true for your school. It makes it difficult to get good information.


very interesting. I had no idea! I'm going to read more about maria montessori and ask tons of questions at the school...

[Rhonwyn]

in that they vary greatly from school to school. Of the two I looked at, one was very cold, stressed the practical and almost seemed to stamp on the imagination, also the children were nasty to each other and no one intervened; the second was very loving and warm but it was very choatic and all of the children's artwork looked like it had been copied on a copy machine as in no individuality. My sister-in-law on the otherhand, found a Montessori school that she and her children loved. I would learn as much as possible about Montessori and then see how an individual school applies the ideas.

[mammastar]

They very hugely from school to school, and I think that often the name "Montessori" is just used to reel in the enrollment at the shadier places. In a lot of ways, I'd be more cautious about a Montessori school than about your garden variety nursery school because of this - not necessarily because of something inherent in Montessori teachings.

My 2 stepdaughters go to a Montessori school - they both began at age 3 and are now ages 5 and almost 9. The school wasn't our pick, although both kids like it and they have had some very good teachers. It has given us a chance to observe what we like/don't like about it, and think about what we would want for my 2.5 year old. We would have some concerns that relate to the Montessori philosophy, and that may be more or less of an issue depending on the school's own take.

Our principal issue is with the notion of the teacher/directress as an 'expert' to whom you hand over your child. Many Montessoris require daily, often full-day attendance from the age of 3 or 4 (I found that the Canadian Montessori Administrators' association requires this for certification under their standards). For us, this isn't what we are looking for. Some Montessori schools will only take 'older' (i.e. age 5 or 6 and up) new students if they have 'Montessori experience.' I find this unfortunate. My stepdaughters' school required at the preschool level that the parent remain in the doorway while saying goodbye to their child and leave promptly; at the end of the day, the child shakes hands with the teacher at the door and then passes from the teacher's authority to that of the parent. From my point of view, this is somewhat inflexible and also does not represent the level of involvement that we want as parents in our children's education. Finally, the children's 'work' in the classroom at my daughters' school is just too all-consuming for me, in that it doesn't really involve them in their community or the world around them - why practice pouring and counting with approved materials only, and not in the kitchen with mom or dad, or at the beach? For me, it's a bit of a philosophical difference.

With both my stepdaughters, I found that there was a certain period of time after they had just begun preschool where they were very excited to go and do their 'work' (as it's called) every day. By the third year in the same classroom, the glow had worn off. When they were 3 they wanted desperately to get to do the 'work' reserved for older children in the room, such as the moveable alphabet, but were told that they were not yet 'ready' to receive the demonstration in the proper use of the materials (which is often very important in Montessori). Yet by the age of 5, when they were 'ready' to use the older materials, their teachers commented that the girls were reluctant to choose challenging materials and preferred to re-do simpler tasks they had already mastered. This makes me wonder about the wisdom of this emphasis on using materials 'correctly', at least for some children.

If I can think of anything else I'll let you know, but those are the main broad brush concerns I had - other stuff I think would just vary a lot by the school.

[pugmadmama]

The one problem with Montessori is that anyone can use that name -- Maria Montessori didn't trademark or copyright or whatever, so anyone opening a school can call it a Montessori school even if the philosophies aren't even close to "Montessori."

You really have to research each individual school thoroughly. Anything anyone says here about Montessori may or may not hold true for your school. It makes it difficult to get good information.

This is so important. I've interviewed three Montessori schools for my son and they were all different from each other.

In addition to strict "Montessori" schools, there are "Montessori-based" schools, which is what we wound up going with. We loved them. In both schools, the director had been Montessori trained but had decided to add in other elements as well and so did not want to advertise as strictly Montessori.

I know it can be a hassle and time-consuming, but I would not select or reject a Montessori school, or any school, without first doing at least one visit.

[hockeymama]

It actually can depend on what the school's affiliation is (AMS or AMI)

AMS is the American Montessori Association that began by a woman who had met with Mario Montessori (Maria's son) and wanted to begin teacher ed. programs in the states.. She liked the original theories and practices of montessori but wanted to add other components to it and so she broke away from AMI. Basically, and AMI school (Association Montessori Internationale) adheres closer to the original practices of Maria Montessori and thus the lack of room for play, imagination, etc. In the montessori school I teach at, we actually include dress up into our classes, have baby dolls and strollers, and while we do present the materials for their intended usage. there is room for imaginative play as long as they are not being mishandled or destroyed. As someone posted earlier, it isn't intended that the children must "work" all the time, there should be quiet areas for reading, time to play outdoors of course, art. things that do allow a child to experience and express their creativity.

But you do want to be careful, many schools may claim to be montessori but in practice truly aren't be it AMS or AMI neither is better than the other, just different. Also, watch out for teachers that tell you your child isn't ready to try something they are interested in. I have a friend who's daughter is not quite four yet and learned to read and write her name early on, but instead of the teacher encouraging her desire to continue to learn this, she chastised her for learning it "wrong" and said she wasn't ready to do this yet. Well obviously she was becasue she DID!

Do some reading, ask around, feel free to get in touch with me I can maybe answer some more questions for you (though I'm 0-3 not 3-6 but my best friend is a 3-6er, she may be able to help as well). Mostly, your comfort and your child's of course are most important, you instincts will tell you if it's the right fit or not.

you can also check out the different association websites
www.montessori-ami.org (AMI)
www.amshq.org (AMS)
Good luck!

[Mamax3]

The one problem with Montessori is that anyone can use that name -- Maria Montessori didn't trademark or copyright or whatever, so anyone opening a school can call it a Montessori school even if the philosophies aren't even close to "Montessori."

You really have to research each individual school thoroughly. Anything anyone says here about Montessori may or may not hold true for your school. It makes it difficult to get good information.


My children went to a Montessori school for preK and K and it was not allowed to have the word "Montessori" in it's title because at the time of it's inception only one of the two teachers were actually "montessori certified".....since that time they have both been "montessori certified" but didn't go through the channels to change the name of the school. I was told that it couldn't be called a "montessori" school unless all of the teachers have been through the montessori certification process.

[siddie]

WEll, you are asking the right person here, we had a bad Montessori experience. My ds (age 4) attended for 2 and a half to 3 mos and then I withdrew him. My reasons were:
1. Inflexible schedule - they insisted my ds attend ft - it wasn't in their brochure or policy book so was sprung on me as a surprise two weeks into it.
2. Montessori work is also inflexible, only one right way to do things. While it is good for the kids to learn processes and putting things away when finished, I think it is bad for their self-esteem to tell them that they didn't do it correctly.
3. The teachers had obvious favorites in the class, the older kids who had been there longest. The older kids were ALWAYS used to demonstrate new work.
4. Poor supervision on the playground. No preventative measures for biting, hitting.
5. Pushing the independance thing a little too far. Ex: if you can't open your applesauce at lunch by yourself, you can't eat it. Not reading books to kids, telling them to look at the pictures and figure out for themself what is happening.
6. Teachers are not the warm fuzzy preschool teachers you imagine. The term directress is a good description. I think all preschoolers need a few hugs and reassurances now and then, not a prison work leader.
7. Bad judgement on the part of the director and teachers that included walking the kids 3 blocks along a busy 4-lane highway to the library for storytime.
8. None of the good old fun stuff like fingerpainting and water play. Painting is done one way (use the sponge or flower to make a print) and water play consists of washing windows with water.
9. There seems to be a bit of an elitist attitude associated with Montessori. WHile this particular school was actually cheaper than most, the families were all living in the most $$ zipcodes and driving $$ cars and suvs. Unfortunately, most of the parents were both working too. Some kids were dropped off by nannies in Lexus Suv's. There were only two other moms aside from myself that are sahms.
10. This school touted itself as an AMI school but is NOT a member. I telephoned to verify their membership and was shocked that they would misrepresent themselves.
11. They would move toddlers up to the age 3-6 yr old class at age 2yrs 9 mos with the only requirement being they were potty trained. I think they should have just left those kids in the class they were comfortable in. They should have also required them to have mastered not biting or hitting.

That said, I am still considering a different Montessori school for the fall but I am really checking it out well. I am making multiple observations and asking very direct questions. They are much nicer and do not require mandatory attendance. They also have an open door policy which is more comfortable for me.

[mamamillet]

My son attends a Montessori school that we both love. That being said, I really think it depends on the school. I also looked at a school that was way too focused on academics-for 3-5 year olds. The three yo class had limited time outside and the 4 and 5 yo had none on a daily basis. I was looking for a school that would really help guide him socially and emotionally and the majority of the time the kids were encouraged to "work" independently which I did not feel would help him socially or emotionally. The school he now attends is very different. I haven't seen any strict adherence to some of the negative things being said in this post. I also feel that wram fuzzy feeling from a lot of the teachers at the school. The children are alo very well surpervised outside and being mean to others is also not allowed. The op asked for things not liked about montessori--there are more things that I like than don't and I really think it depends on the school.

[siddie]

Some of the things that should have tipped me off about the bad Mont. School my ds attended are:
1. NO wait list, the good schools in our city have long wait lists of 1-2 yrs
2. HIgh turnover of kids, the first month we saw 3 kids in a class of 15 leave
3. The teacher was eager to start my ds in school, I was actually planning on starting him in summer or fall, she talked me into starting him in FEb. (big mistake) because "he was ready"

[siddie]

I almost forgot, the reason we are still considering Montessori is because it has been proven to be esp. good for boys. They have a harder time sticking with group activities and like working independently. Long term studies done by HeaDSTART show higher sat scores for boys that attended Mont. than for those who attended a tradtitional preschool. The higher scores are sustained through 8th grade. IT is attributed to the boys learning to work independently (motivated from within) and learning to work projects/processes through at an early age.

[aishy]

I have no complaints about the Montessori school my son went to. It is closed now, but we will miss it so much. My son did so well, he loved going to school. He goes to a traditional school this year for Kindergarden, using the A Beka curriculum, so we'll see how that goes. And I plan to home-pre-school my 3 year old using mostly Montessori materials & ideas. And a lot of the more "unschooling" and learning from the world around us ideas as well.

aisling

[mommy22]

We are in our 8th year at our montessori school. It is true that anyone can use the name Montessori, but you can't say you are AMS, AMI, etc. if you haven't been certified through them.

Our school is AMS, and it's a great mixture. We are a Montessori school, following montessori principals, but there are other interests included.

The real life vs. imaginary was never an issue. It's never even been discussed within the realm of montessori principals at our school. My kids got/get plenty of playtime and plenty of opportunities to express themselves through their imagination.

Currently my boys are in 3rd and 5th grade, and will continue Montessori through 8th grade. If we are lucky enough to somehow get a montessori HS in this area, they will attend that as well.

You know the saying "It takes a village to raise a child"? I consider our school part of my village!

[babyj]

I agree that everything depends on the school / teachers. DS (32 months) just started a summer program 2 AMs a week and we're loving it. I observed a whole bunch of schools and this particular school twice. I also attended a Q & A session with the directors as well as met individually with the pre-school director. I would say that a good school will encourage you to research, question and observe. Our school seems as interested in how the parents feel as well as the children. I had also heard that Mont Method was good for active boys. I would recommend not only observing the appropriate age group for your child but the next level up. That way you can see if you like the direction your child would be headed.

My one itty bitty complaint is that they are soooo respectful of each child's body (personal space) that at our school they will not force a diaper change (at least to DS). Understand that this is a child who is very anti diaper change and will always refuse a change. I guess I actually like the fact that he doesn't have to have his privacy invaded unless he agrees but.... That said, they did change a poopy diaper on him earlier this week.

The school day ( 2&1/2 hrs total) starts on the playground and parents are encourged to join their children. At some point one of the teachers will come around and say "feel free to leave when you're ready". I love this. My son and I now have an agreement that I'll stay 5 minutes. If you choose to stay, and you can, you will have to stay the entire class (I've done this).

My son comes home with lots paintings, stampings and gluings. I love how they handle snacks, and the teachers shake hands, hug and have children sitting on their laps some of the time (depending on the child's desire). Yes, we're probably in the honeymoon phase, but I would strongly recommend observing a certified Montessori school near you.

babyj

[e&r]

check out www.pleasantvalleymontessori.com/second/schedule.htm

for what should be a typical day in a Children's House

[siddie]

ANother thing that stands out to me after comparing the new/improved Montessori school we are considering and the developmental school is the lack of new activities. The developmental school has lots of things scheduled like water play, pinata day, paper mache volcanos. The MOntessor has the same work out on the shelves day after day.

[mommyboo]

The one problem with Montessori is that anyone can use that name -- Maria Montessori didn't trademark or copyright or whatever, so anyone opening a school can call it a Montessori school even if the philosophies aren't even close to "Montessori."

You really have to research each individual school thoroughly. Anything anyone says here about Montessori may or may not hold true for your school. It makes it difficult to get good information.
I agree. Even Montessori International has a disclaimer on its website about individual schools having their own interpretation of Montessori philosophy. My son went to one well known and well established one. He was in the toddlers class and the school was beautiful. I should have observed a session I think. The director was very charming during the tour, the curriculum was great and the kids looked ok so I went for it. The teacher had unrealistic expectations from a 2 year old. She expected a VERY high level of attention span, focus, lack of interest in toys, she expected good communication skills and just imposssible levels of co operation from a child who has only just left home and started school !! She had the nerve to complain my son was too creative and active, full of pretend play !! I had him out of there in only 3 weeks ! Good riddance I say! I am a pediatric occupational therapist and I know my son is just fine for his age. It was horrible to hear someone blabber on about how active he is, with poor attention span etc etc, Puhleese! :irked:
Anyhow, please do your homework before enrolling.

[Treasuremapper]

I looked into a local Montessori school, which says it is AMI, but I have some real problems with it and decided against it. On the plus side, it appeared to be real Montessori in terms of the equipment, furniture, etc.

But it is located right next to a huge highway right off the feeder, so the playground is dominated by highway noise.

In addition, they prohibit parents from coming into the classroom at any time, ever, for any reason, not even for drop off or pick up. The ratio is one adult for fourteen children! Yikes! I can barely manage with one adult for two children, believe me.

It is very expensive, around $550 a month for three hours a day five days a week, plus more for any extras. I calculated a bit and wondered why they were always fundraising so hard with tuition like that with the bad location and the poor ratio of teachers and students. Something fishy is up with that. They definitely didn't appear to be putting the money into beautifying the grounds.

There were things about it that I loved, but not enough to make the financial sacrifices that would be required to pull it off.

[mommy22]

If parents are not allowed into the classroom, then I would have to say that this school is not a 'true' Montessori school. With rules like that, I would stay away, too!

As far a student/teacher ratio, 1/14 is pretty good, depending on the ages of the students. Alot of Montessori schools are as high as 1/20 and that's because the children work in small groups with self-directed materials. The teachers are in the classroom as guides for the children. And consider that in traditional public/private schools, the student/teacher ratio is as high as 1/30! My children are in an elementary, AMS Montessori school. There are about 23 students per classroom and each classroom has 1 teacher and 1 aid.

Location is important, but not as important as the school's ciriculum, teachers, staff and adherence to Montessori philosophy.

[comet]

One Montessori school I checked out made it very clear that parents were not allowed to come to the classroom, except perhaps once or twice a year. GADS! It was a colder atmosphere than I wanted, almost too quiet. When I visited the school, I had to sit in a chair in the corner turned to one side so as to not disrupt the children. I was told to not make direct eye contact with any child. It felt so creepy to me.

The other Montessori school across town from this one was so much friendlier and looser, I liked it much better. Also, the 2nd one had a playground outside, whereas the first one didn't (big surprise, not). I'm sure my daughter will like the second one better than the first one. You really have to actually go and visit any school you're considering.

[Evan&Anna's_Mom]

This may or may not be important to you, depending on your plans for after preschool. The private school my son will start soon will not accept students from a Montessori preschool because of the emphasis on self-directed work which does not, in their experience, transition well into a more typical classroom. As I said, may not matter to you. May or may not be true about the transition. But probably worth a quick thought about what you think you want to do post-preschool. If you are headed to public school or a different private school, you might want to ask their teachers about their opinions about the local school you are considering.

[chiedza]

My son (age 2) goes to a Montessori school that has a toddler room for kids age 2-3. They are not certified AMS or AMI, but all of the head teachers have gone through Montessori training.

He's only been there 5 weeks, but we are having a really good experience. I especially wanted to add something about the imagination issue -- my DS has become incredibly imaginative since he started there. He is all the time pretending to be different people, animals, objects, etc., and to hold different animals in his hands and pet them, etc. Maybe this is naturally for his age, I don't know, but it seemed to really take off after he started at the school.

And at the school itself I don't know exactly how they encourage imaginitive play or not, but they do have toys for pretend play such as toy kitchens with food, dolls, dressup clothes, etc.

I never knew there was an issue about Montessori schools discouraging imaginative play before I read it here, but I would simply ask the teachers and director about that issue when you visit the school(s) you are considering.

[Kleine Hexe]

I had my DS in a M school for a week and took him out. When I wanted to observet he classroom I too had to sit in a corner and not interact. I was told they have an open door policy which to me means I can enter the classroom and see my child when I like. That's what it meant at the daycare I worked at before I had children. After I enrolled my DS I found out that this open door policy was not what I thought. I was not allowed to enter the classroom not even to pick him up at the end of the day. His first day he was afraid and wanted me to go in with him. The director reluctantly complied but I had to sit in the corner again. The next day my DS walked in willing by himself. The third day all hell broke loose. He screamed and cried. I walked him to the room and the teacher stopped me at the door and said she would take him in and I was to leave. "It's important to let the child know he can not manipulate you" she said to me.

I would hang around and watch him throught the window (tinted so he couldn't see me) and he often sat by himself. It made me sad that the teachers did not really try to talk to him. I know my son needs time and space to warm up but it was like he was being ignored. After seeing him sitting by himself on the playground for 10 minutes I decided to take him home since there was only 15 minutes left of his day. I walked out onto the playground (which I wasn't supposed to do) and tried talking to the teacher. I asked her if he interacted, had fun, played with the kids. I wanted to know if he *enjoyed* being there. She told me they don't call it "playing" they call it "work." Now I know all about the philosophy and jazz...I learned all about child development from my days of teaching. I wanted to know if my son was having a good time. I didn't need a lecture. When I started to leave with him the teacher told me "it was ok if I left with him now because the day was almost over." Well, I hadn't asked her permission to leave with *my* child! I was very unhappy with her condescending attitude and inability to tell me how my child was doing and if he was enjoying himself.

I actually took him back the next day. I don't know why. The way parents were supposed to drop off kids was to pull up in the car and a teacher came and got the child out. I can see the practicality of this. My son started screaming when the lady opened the door. He was unbuckled and he jumped into my lap in the driver's seat. He was clinging to me screaming and crying and the woman was actually trying to pry him off me! I almost punched her in the face. I told her to let him go. She looked confused and said that I wasn't really allowed to take him to the classroom. I told her she was not taking him. I sat there thinking about it all. I decided we weren't ready for this. My son was not ready for school and I did not like the school. We never went back.

I started to think more about the real life structure the school had. I don't want my son to think he can't try an activity before he's been "shown" how to do it. I want him to learn to use his imagination and to be creative. I want his problem solving skills to develop. I do not see that happening at the school I tried.

Very sour taste in mouth from that school. Now I'm seriously consifering homeschooling.

[alwayslearning2]

I really wanted my 2 1/2 to have the opportunity that montessori provides, however I hate hate hate that you cann't stay in the room till they get acclimated and have to hand then to the teacher at the door. I think he will love the materials and learning from the other children, but after a week of pre-school "summer camp" he doesn't want to leave the house, he says he wants to stay home,
is this just a transition, or am i scarring him pushing him to de-attatch from me before he is ready. he is still nursing co-sleeping

[alwayslearning2]

We are afraid of loosing money because of the tuition contract... if we pull him out,
We would be giving up our only money to buy montessori materials for him to use at will at home!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
for those who pulled thier kids out, how did you get out of the tuition contract??????????????

[alwayslearning2]

Does anyone else's school say that no-pullups, even for the first days, they said to bring three changes of clothes, that the other 2 yr 6 monthsolds would have accidents as well, isn't this degrading in a room with 2 1'2 - 6 year olds?

[babyj]

Isn't the beauty of M letting the child develop at their own pace? The no pullups rule sounds a bit like forcing potty training. However, I do know that some M educators value "natural" materials (infants at the M school DS attends (he's almost 3) wear cloth diapers while in care of the school). I also think that sometimes M educators may think that parents can hinder their child by not allowing them the opportunity to potty learn. During the summer my son declared that he no longer wore diapers. We had no choice but to put him in underwear. We just sent lots of extra clothes. He didn't seem bothered by the accidents (we were!). His M teacher assured us that accidents are part of learning. We were somewhat relieved when he came home and reported that "Ben peed on the floor today". We thought "whew, he's not the only kid peeing on the floor". However, it was his choice not to wear underwear. I'm not sure if I could agree with the school's declaration. Are there any other parents you can talk to about this at the school?

Take care,

b

[babyj]

We are afraid of loosing money because of the tuition contract...

Will they keep the money on hand in case you want to try again next year? At our school the money stays with the school but you can re-enroll at a later time if you withdraw early.

Is your son crying when you leave or later? Have you asked the director if you can stay? 2&1/2 seems very young to ask to enter a new place w/o their parent. Have you ever just gone into the room and sat quitely on the floor by the door? (I've done it). My personal rule is that my son doesn't cry without me or DH. Just like when he was an infant. If leaving him requires crying then I'm not leaving. One thing that helped us was saying I'll stay for 5 minutes and making sure that he was in a teachers arms when I left. I do think that part of this is transition but I don't think that transition should be miserable.

Take care,
b

[Tanibani]

One Montessori school I checked out made it very clear that parents were not allowed to come to the classroom, except perhaps once or twice a year. GADS! It was a colder atmosphere than I wanted, almost too quiet. When I visited the school, I had to sit in a chair in the corner turned to one side so as to not disrupt the children. I was told to not make direct eye contact with any child.

Haven't read the entire thread yet. Don't know much about M. But I am aware that some schools don't do things as she wanted.

Just wanted to comment on the above. Yeah, that's creepy.... but the benefit of not interrupting the kids during their own exploration (whether at home, outside, whatever) is that the kids are busy learning, deepening their learning experience, whatever it is. Though at home I am very guilty of interrupting.... he'll be at the sink making a huge mess - sorry you gotta stop. Or we are on our way out the door and he'll want to look at the bug outside.

But not making eye contact. :scratch That just sounds bizarre and extreme to me. You can still make eye contact, smile and just let the kid be, no?

I really wanted my 2 1/2 to have the opportunity that montessori provides, however I hate hate hate that you cann't stay in the room till they get acclimated and have to hand then to the teacher at the door. I think he will love the materials and learning from the other children, but after a week of pre-school "summer camp" he doesn't want to leave the house, he says he wants to stay home,

My spidey instincts tell me that it would be "pushing him too soon." I agree :nod with Babyj.

Kleine Hexe's post just made me :angry

I'm sure many of you already know that kids learn by PLAYING. That is their most important job!

Ooey Gooey.com (http://www.ooeygooey.com/) (Lisa Murphy is a former day care provider / preschool teacher and lecturer on the importance of play. I highly recommend her books!)

We believe that children have the right to...

1) long periods of uninterrupted free play time
2) adults who are acting as facilitators
3) freedom to explore with few restrictions
4) lots and lots of outdoor time
5) be engaged in experiences that are real

Alwayslearning2... ask about getting your money back. Maybe do a site search (google) on the art of negotiating. I think he's WAY TO YOUNG (every kid is different) to be left alone. He's making it crystal clear to you. You might end up like Vanessa... just pulling him out early.... and losing all chances to get any money back. :angry But the instructors (if they are like Vanessa's) don't sound sympathetic because they are so dang dogmatic.

:OT I take my son to a play-based preschool. Very similar to Lisa Murphy's philosophies on the importance of play.

There is a multi-age class. DS started going when he was 3.5 (I would have put him in earlier, like 2.5, but I found out too late and there was a waiting list....) He's in a multi-age class - 3-5 year olds... and it's a HUGE class with 50 kids. THere are different play stations (art, science, books, blocks, cars, costumes, etc... ) and parents have to work 1 day a week. So there are 2 or 3 teachers a day, but the PARENTS are integral to making it work because 2 have to man each station. That's what I LOVE about it, because I am totally free to stay and observe. Parents are facilitators in play (handing kids materials they need) and really don't spend much time talking to them (just each other) and that's not even a stated rule!!!! Just a natural outcome. I :love :love :love this school! Best part, it's extremely affordable (like $300 for 2 months) because part of it is paid by the state.

BTW, it's only 9-12, not a full day. I think that's a good thing... my friend has her DD in a full day M program and her DD has had really bad meltdown's at home. I do think that some kids are too young (she's 3.5) for a full day. Being away from your loved ones (mom or dad) so young for so long can really get to a kid at the end of the day.

First school day was yesterday and they encouraged new and old parents to stay with the child the half day (so as not to overwhelm the new / old kids and parents can walk with their children in the classroom, discovering how the room / things works). Doesn't sound like M to me. :angry

[mom2go]

I just pulled my 3 yr old son out of an AMI accredited Montessori school 2 days ago. He had been attending for over 2 months and here's my take on Montessori.
Its designed to fit a particular type of parent and many but not all children. The freedom and calm that is usually one's first impression of a Montessori classroom is a result of pretty inflexible training in behavior and exact methods of using materials. If you are the kind of parent who wants a 'well behaved' child and feels that Montessori is going to give him / her a head start towards a glorious academic future then you will love it. If, on the other hand, your primary goal is that your child feels secure, free to explore and to socialize then forget it!
The Montessori method does not accomodate for any soicalizing beyond a group time (where the kids sit down and listen and don't touch each other), Playground time and working together. Start horsing around when you are working and you are split up faster than you can blink! Helping each other with work is not encouraged and the teacher does not mediate child - child interactions.
My son is / was well adjusted secure and very curious when he joined this school. He was already reading and we figured Montessori would allow him to explore his interests.
Alarm bells should have started going off when we were told a week before the starting day that parents were not to enter the building for the first 30 days! So began the trauma of my son being hauled out of the car kicking and screaming every morning. Then began a barrage of complaints "he won't put his slippers on" "he won't use the toys correctly" "he's rough with the materials". further discussion revealed that he physically could not put his slippers on and had, at times, been made to sit in the entry to the room for up to half an hour until his slippers were on his feet. We replaced the slippers and requested that he get some assistance. The inappropriate use of toys involved stacking blocks 'incorrectly'. The tower only goes from largest to smallest. No making castles bridges or pretending that the blocks are cars. Furthermore, no pretending anything. And forget all about the temptation to bang two objects together to check out the noise they might make, you destructive creature!
Towards the end of this secretive month I actually got into the building unannounced since I was dropping off things for the classroom and, lo and behold, saw my son, who I had dropped off 5 mintues earlier, being yelled at (yes I mean yelled) for using a basket as a hat. His hand was pulled down onto a table and the teacher yelled full into his face. Suffice it to say we were concerned and the principal moved him to another room.
Now, of course, we were working on a 'problem child' who wouldn't cooperate and so I was encouraged to come in to help him for a few days. What do I find . . .Those blasted slippers are still getting no help (he needs to be self sufficient, I am told) he is not allowed to play with materials he is interested in until he has mastered the ability to use other materials that he is not interested in simply because there is an order to how you are allowed to use things in the classroom. Did it matter that I had a three year old who was reading fluently and starting to figure out basic math?? Not at all. He still had to figure out how to wash a table (a procedure that involves 10-12 exact steps to be followed) since that, they felt, would teach him to concentrate. My attempts to get him to socialise were treated as a secondary need. The few times that I tried to leave him alone in class for a while, I returned to find him removed from the class and sitting in the principals office. The final straw was when I came in, sat on the floor in the office to talk to him and he told me that he was not a good boy but was a bad boy instead. That was the end of it.
If you are thinking of a Montessori school for your child please research the school carefully and ask that you be allowed to observe the class in action for more than just a few minutes. Try and look beyond the serenity of the room to whether the children are interacting and seem happy. It was amazing how many times I saw children sitting next to some 'work' gazing off into space. The ratio in these classrooms is ridiculously off kilter. 2 teachers for 30 kids when you have a number of three year olds is ridiculous and, in my opinion, dangerous.
The Montessori mission is quite open about the things I've outlined above (well not the yelling . .. that was an individual teacher) but it is done in glowing terms as if that is the best way to teach a child about life.
I think this idea of a carline dropoff which more and more schools seem to insist on is absolutely insane. Which child, going away from his mother to strangers for the first time, needs to be pulled out of his car seat by someone he has no familiarity with?
Good luck!

[mom2go]

We are afraid of loosing money because of the tuition contract... if we pull him out,
We would be giving up our only money to buy montessori materials for him to use at will at home!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
for those who pulled thier kids out, how did you get out of the tuition contract??????????????

When we pulled out we said (quite rightly, I believe) that the school had not met our child's needs and was unable to provide him with the care he needed. We told them basically that it was a bad fit and that he was not suited to a Montessori style of education. Our school had a clause in the handbook that allowed them to ask you to remove a child if they feel that he is a bad fit to the school. So, we figured that what's sauce for the goose can be sauce for the gander. Perhaps we were lucky but it worked.

[kaydee]

My understanding is that AMI has the most strict (rigid?) interpretation of Montessori principles. There are no AMI-certified schools in my area, but even if there were, I would not choose one. AMS is a little bit less rigid; and, of course, most Montessori schools aren't accredited by either organization.

Not all Montessori schools are alike. Many are flexible about how they implement and interpret Montessori approaches. Doing your own homework about what you like/don't like about Montessori, visiting individual schools, and asking questions will help you determine how a school implements Montessori.

[NorCal Mama]

I'm shocked to hear so many bad things about Montessori. I enrolled my son into a Montessori school 2 years ago. He's really sprouted a lot. At first I had my reservations. I didn't think that he would be able to focus during goal time. All the kids work on their individual goals, so from an outside perspective it looks kind of chaotic in the classroom. He had a hard time at first and wasn't completing his goals, but we stuck with it, and now he really enjoys being able to guide which direction his education goes. I really like that about Montessori.
As far as the play, and imagination goes, I would have to agree with some of the others, that it totally depends on the school. This year I took on the job as guide for the after-school program. I've really gotten to know the kids better, and the way things work in the classroom. I see no lack of creativity or imagination. These kids go on and on with stories, and imaginitive play.
I'm happy with Montessori, and so is my ds.

[umbrella]

I have to say, that the overwhelming majority of the negatives posted here, have not been our experience at all.

Just want to point out that most of these are problems with a particular school, and not necessarily a Montessori method issue.

for those who pulled thier kids out, how did you get out of the tuition contract?

We pay month-to-month. We'll be moving shortly, and I've mentioned it to the director, and all he said was to remind him again when that time comes closer, so we can stop the automatic monthly payments. We just stop paying when she stops attending.

One Montessori school I checked out made it very clear that parents were not allowed to come to the classroom, except perhaps once or twice a year.

Not how it is at my dd's school at all. Parents are encouraged to let their kids show them around in the early morning (but asked to head out by the first group time), and any time I've shown up early to pick up dd, I've hung out waiting for until dd finished whatever she was doing. It's never been discouraged. I just try to be quiet so as not to disturb others working. If ever I arrive during final circle time, I'm welcomed inside to watch.

[umbrella]

Wow, there's a whole post of negatives! I'm sorry you all went through that. This list here hasn't been our experience at all.


1. Inflexible schedule - they insisted my ds attend ft - it wasn't in their brochure or policy book so was sprung on me as a surprise two weeks into it.

Ours is Very flexible. They prefer students to be on time, but you choose full day or half day or 2 days or 3 or 4 or 5 days.

3. The teachers had obvious favorites in the class, the older kids who had been there longest. The older kids were ALWAYS used to demonstrate new work.

Not something I've seen. But the majority of my dd's class was pretty new when she started.

4. Poor supervision on the playground. No preventative measures for biting, hitting.

I've been pretty pleased with how the teachers have responded to the kiddie fights at our school. Dd even goes to them just when people aren't being nice, and I've liked pretty much every way the teachers here have handled it.

5. Pushing the independance thing a little too far. Ex: if you can't open your applesauce at lunch by yourself, you can't eat it. Not reading books to kids, telling them to look at the pictures and figure out for themself what is happening.

Wow. The teachers DEFINITELY help the kids open their things at lunch. Dd has even repeated at home during pretend games, "anyone who needs help opening lunch items, please raise your hand." And I've been present during story time before.

6. Teachers are not the warm fuzzy preschool teachers you imagine. The term directress is a good description. I think all preschoolers need a few hugs and reassurances now and then, not a prison work leader.

Dd's teachers have been fuzzy :) The new assistant teacher isn't as warm, but I think there's enough of a balance with the main teacher.

7. Bad judgement on the part of the director and teachers that included walking the kids 3 blocks along a busy 4-lane highway to the library for storytime.

Dang.

8. None of the good old fun stuff like fingerpainting and water play. Painting is done one way (use the sponge or flower to make a print) and water play consists of washing windows with water.

Dd does do a lot of art projects. At first, I was a little concerned that they didn't seem to require much creativity. But THEN, I decided that she didn't need that so much at school. Of course she can't get everything from school, and since we make sure to do plenty of creative play and art at home, this is one thing that I'm fine to have not fit my ideal for a school.

[mamaley]

whoa. one big fat ditto to umbrellas post. at our school, you have to go 5 days a week, earliest pick up time is at noon, but that's the only difference.

i'm sorry so many have had bad experiences.

[Kindermama]

I've only read a few responses and I found most of what was said to not be true re: my daughter's montessori experience. She just started montessori this year and is in the kindergarten year and my daughter is still veryyyy imaginative. She always has been.

The proof is really in the pudding....I have yet to pick K up at school and not see a smile on her face. She LOOOOOOOVEs her school. She goes full-time which I was against in the beginning of the school year but she asked to go full-time. She wants to go. Every weekend, she asks when is it going to be Monday again.

She is learning sooo much. In just a short three months time, K has learned all the letter sounds, she is "pretending" to read to us, she writes her alphabet upper and lower case......most of these things she was doing before the school year, at least not at the level she is doing them now. We are going to the open house for the elementary program which combines 1st-3rd grade. Anyways, she currently has gym twice a week, music and spanish. She comes home every Friday with her week's worth of work and she is so proud of her work.

I can't say enough good things about Montessori. But we've only had a few months experience with M. I wonder what it will be like when K transfers to another school that is not M.

[Kindermama]

I just read some more of the replies and my daughter's school must be different. She has super nice teachers. She fell on the playground and she told me how ms. moore hugged her till she felt better and rubbed her boo-boo. Her teachers are always smiling and energetic. When we visited the school, I was allowed to speak to the children. In fact, a few of them whipped out their work to show me. I was even allowed to sit at the table while they did crafts.

It is true that K goes in at the door. But it's circle time when I drop her off and all the kids are in the circle sharing their "news" and things from home and singing and talking about the weather and the date.

I feel I can approach any of her teachers at any time. They are all so enthusiastic.

Socially, K's no longer the shy little girl she once was. She has made many friends and even blew us away when she asked to sing at the town's christmas concert on stage in front of at least 100 people. It was the high school band too. Yep, I digress but socially she has finally blossomed.

[Rubynellie]

I love Montessori. My oldest started at age 3 and thrived. Lots of practical life work (pouring, hammering, washing, preparing food), and allowed to use whatever works he was ready for. He did lots of geography and math work and has always excelled at what he does. By 3rd grade, he learned that it was his responsibility to organize and complete his work.

He graduated in the 8th grade, is now in high school (public), and transitioned beautifully. The teachers at other schools generally love Montessori kids, at least they do around here, and they come right out and tell my son so. Whoever said they don't transition well just prefers traditional teaching.

My next child also began at age 3 but I learned later it was too soon for him. I would wait a year if I had the chance again (which I did with a later child). We ended up having him repeat his kindergarten year. He has had learning problems, but with careful monitoring and extra help at school, he has overcome them and he is now in middle school, also thriving.

My third began as the perfect independent Montessori child but found that making choices was too stressful for him, as he is a perfectionist, and he has a lot of energy. They don't like that at Montessori. After six years there, he is now doing very well at a traditional school (transitioned well there, also and they love it that he helps the other kids with their work, as he's very good in math).

My littlest began at age four, having my second's shy personality. He needed to be home with me, still nursing at the time (and now actually--he's almost six). It was the right decision and he is a very serious student, loving his class.

My kids all got left at the classroom door. Can you imagine the chaos if all the parents came in the classroom? You have to leave at some point, why not the door? If the child won't go in, what the heck are you making them do it for? I have had resistant children and I have taken them home those days. I think that's okay. I have seen many parents sitting outside the door of the toddler class while their one-yr-old screams. I think that's horrible. Know that it is risky to sign a year contract for a small child who may not want to go. (There is tuition insurance for such purposes, although not full reimbursement).

You need to observe in the classroom, get recommendations and watch your child's response. While I certainly do not approve of unsympathetic teachers, I understand why they insist the parent leave the child at the door and let the teacher do their job. It's not necessarily the teacher's fault the child is having a difficult time separating from the parent (although obviously the child could be telling you something is wrong in the class--you should be able to sort that out if you watch carefully).

Ideally, Montessori classrooms are (or should be) run with basically the same method in the 3-6 year old class, since that is what Montessori was originally aimed at. The 1st-3rd I think is probably also pretty similar (we've been to two schools), at least in my experience, with the goal of having the children learn to be independent workers. The next level up is more teacher oriented at that point but may differ from school to school.

I love the way my kids can talk to adults on an equal level and how they love to learn. They have been provided wonderful opportunities and the teachers have shown trust in the child's ability to do things that I as a parent would not have thought they could do.

They have no homework until they are in 4th grade so they can play after school when they are in 1st-3rd grade, and I have had virtually no homework hassles when the time came. They also have been taught strong public speaking skills, and of course the teachers get to know them very well after having them for several years.

Drawbacks? As with any private school, there are those with a lot of money and sorry to say, but there is favoritism towards those who have it ( it is a business), and towards children of the teachers. Also, there really is not the accountability there is in public schools (I used to be convinced of the opposite) as far as if you have a complaint about a teacher--they will protect their own. You can complain your way right out of the school if you insult them. No school is perfect so be flexible.

Also, as with my one child, the structure in the early elementary gave him too much freedom to NOT choose to do work he felt he didn't understand or like. The teachers are not trained the way they are in the public schools to recognize learning problems/behavior problems, although some certainly do with experience, and I am mortified that they suggested medication for my child--something that he doesn't need in a traditional setting. Hopefully, in time he can learn to be an independent worker AFTER he gains some confidence. That said, I highly recommend checking Montessori out.

[mom22gyrls]

The one problem with Montessori is that anyone can use that name -- Maria Montessori didn't trademark or copyright or whatever, so anyone opening a school can call it a Montessori school even if the philosophies aren't even close to "Montessori."

You really have to research each individual school thoroughly. Anything anyone says here about Montessori may or may not hold true for your school. It makes it difficult to get good information.


Montessori schools, if they are true montessoris schools, are "governed" by a group that holds them to the true philosophies of Maria Montessori. AMI and AMS are the two training facilities that ensusre that Montessori schools are held up to standards. www.montessori-ami.org is the one organization that holds to the truest form of Montessori.


I am going to add on here as I can't hold back. :)
I for one LOVE Montessori and am so glad that our school holds so closely to the philosophies and goals of Maria Montessori. She was way ahead of her time.

I know many people have issues about the pretend issues. It was explained to me that children at young ages do think very concretely and pretend play is difficult for young children to understand, even though some understand it befor others. Pretend or fiction is introduced to the children as they can handle it. But what is so nice about having them look at things of nature rather than having show and tell or washing dishes for real, rather than pretending to play dress up is that they develop an awareness of their surroundings and an appreciation of the world in general. I'll stop here since I haven't read the posts that others have written.

[Lucky]

As I was reading through the posts, I started to wonder if dc's Montessori school was the only one like it. We love everything about it! Glad to see by the 3rd page, that there are others who had wonderful experiences at Montessori schools. ;)


So sorry that others experienced all of that 'bad stuff'...I hope you have found a better place that you are happier with.

For those who are still seeking good Montessori education, move to Indianapolis...your're welcome at to our school. :D

[Jenee]

Hey, I'm new here. :)

My son is almost 4. He started preschool at our local Montessori school this fall. Although I like the Montessori philosophy and have heard of some really good schools, I have a few concerns about this particular school and teaching staff. There are two teachers that seem really caring and receptive to the children, but the other three do not. From the very first day, it seemed like the head teacher was more interested in maintaining a routine than in creating a comfortable environment for the children. My son had never been away from home before except in family care, so he was understandably anxious and nervous about me leaving him. The head teacher walked up and tried to take his hand to lead him into the classroom without even greeting him, and when he clung to me instead, she sighed exasperatedly and went back into the room. That should have been my first sign that this may not have been the school for us, but I tried to be understanding that everyone can have bad/irritable days. However, it seems like the little incidents just keep happening. A different teacher, who is also the owner of the school, seems to have a rough manner that is not conducive to being around small children. I have heard him speaking in harsh tones to certain children when there was no need to be so brusque. Yesterday, when I came to pick up my child, another little boy tried to walk outside (they were getting ready for playground time), and he grabbed him by the upper arm and pulled him back while verbally reprimanding him in harsh tones for trying to go outside. The other teacher in the classroom saw it but said nothing. Another time, as I was leaving with my son, an older child came up to the door to peek out, and a different teacher told him to "go away." It seems like in general, the atmosphere is rather cold and distant. The two teachers I really like are always gentle and caring with the children and seem to have way more cpmpassion than the other three, but they work mostly with the older children. I understand that the shcool encourages independence and such, but these teachers seem to get frustrated when the children don't know how to do things sometimes. My son keeps bringing the same artwork home from school on the days that he goes--construction papers with pre-cut shapes glued to them. I don't think the school ever has the children draw or paint during art time. On occasion, I have come to pick up my child and seen that there were children on the playground and the gate between the parking lot and playground was open. With only one or two teachers supervising the outside group at a time, that is so dangerous--the younger children could slip away unnoticed to the parking lot, and it's only a short distance from there to the road. I latched the gate and brought it to the teacher's attention, but it has happened several times. That kind of inattentiveness to critical details worries me greatly.

I am really confused and I am not sure what to make of all this, so I apologize if it is too long or rambly or just seems silly. If it was just one incident, that would be one thing, but all the small things added up make me feel that maybe this is not the school for us. I am thinking of talking to one of the nicer teachers and explaining my concerns, but I don't know if that will fix anything. Overall I just get a bad vibe, and I am thinking of switching my child to a conventional preschool next year (the only other option in my area). I am feeling very conflicted and disappointed right now. Do I have a right to be concerned?

**Edited to add that these problems are mostly not montessori-curriculum specific, so I hope this is ok to post here**

[NorCal Mama]

I would definitely recommend that you talk to one of the nicer teachers about your concerns. Tell her, that this is causing you to consider moving your child to a conventional school. Also, express that you don't want to cause any uproar among the staff, that maybe your issues could be resolved in a non-accusitive manner. If things don't change within a couple of weeks...move. Have you considered the option of a home daycare? I chose to not send my older ds to preschool, because I was so happy with his day care provider that ran it in her home. She had a really open attitude toward learning, nutrition, and children's needs. I don't think that preschool is all that necessary, unless it's a really good environment and it fits your child and their needs.

Is this a certified Montessori school? It doesn't sound like it, by the way you described the art. Precut shapes is not Montessori.

Hope you find the right answer. Let us know how it goes.

[kaydee]

This sounds to me less like a problem with Montessori, and more like a problem with this particular school. I would have a real problem with the harshness and impatience!

[alwayslearning2]

I love the montessori philosophy, it' s seems that intrinsic learning is what will tryly help to prepare children for learning at a later age.

For us the owner/ head teacher is very kind, however the teacher if the room my 3 yr old is in has grabbed his arm ( at parent night) and regularly speaks harshly to the children.
At my meeting with her, she lectured me and didn't listen to my suggestions, although she said warlier that she was open to suggestions, she was completely on the defensive.
When I asked her yesterday when a good time for a meeting would be, she said to waint untill parent conferences in March, but I don't want my son in a place where he is getting yelled at, I am serching for other schools, but so far no dice.

[Cian'sMama]

Jenee,
I am so sorry to read about your problems with your son's school. I agree with some of the other posts that say this sounds like a problem with the individual teacher/school rather than the Montessori philosophy. I am a certified Montessori teacher and have worked in early childhood education for eight years in both a Montessori school and regular mainstream preschool. I can tell you from experience that schools are staffed by a variety of people. Some of these are dedicated to enriching the lives of young children. They are warm, loving, enthusiastic teachers. Others are less than kind, can be cold and are probably in the wrong field. I would recommend to you to seek out a teacher, not a school, who's reputation is great; one who is highly sought after and recommended by parents you know and like. IMO, These first years of schooling are crucial for your son. This is when he will develop, if allowed, a love of learning that will stay with him for life.
I want to stress to all of the parents reading this: If you ever see a teacher use harsh language and "grab" a child (unless it is to prevent him from harming himself or others) please go tell the director immediately. This is totally inappropriate. Maria Montessori stressed that in early childhood children are especially self-conscious and sensitive and we must never do anything to belittle them or make them feel as if they are bad.
I am now a SAHM to my ds. I look forward to starting my own school in a few years. I want to give children a place where they can be free to explore anything they find interesting without fear of criticism. This is my interpretation of the Montessori philosophy. If a child wants to put a basket on his head, fine. I'll show him what it is for and know that eventually he will use it for its intended purpose, once he is sure it is not also a hat. My school will happen to be guided by Montessori principles, but that is not what will make it a good school. Remember this when choosing a school for your child. Montessori, Waldorf, etc.- it is not the title that matters but the character, training and experience of the teachers that really counts.
I wish your son the best in his journey of learning!

[NorCal Mama]

Cian'sMama: I really enjoyed reading your post. I love the way you worded your interpretation of Montessori. :thumb

[mama2karli]

Cian'smama, i am also a trained Montessori teacher, and was about to post something so similar to what you said.

It is often as if each classroom within a school is an island operating independently. if you go check out a school and obseve only one class, you may get a huge shock if your dc ends up in a different classroom. Ask to observe every classroom in a school and you will see what i mean.

i always had a noisy goofy class but we had fun. other teachers emphasized silence. i once knew a teacher that gave kids time outs for *talking*. and parents would request this classroom!!!! you coul hear a pin drop.

[placenta]

about my kids' montessori school - i have only read one book on montessori teaching, and i just realized that i have based a lot of what i understand montessori 'is' just on the experience of our school and the one book!

i interviewed several schools before i picked the one my kids attend, and i felt different things about them, some good, some bad, but the one i picked i thought really epitomized montessori philosophy as i understand it. but now i also wonder how much is just the luck of finding teachers who are really dedicated to the philosophy but also sensitive to the kids' needs. so now i am really feeling a lot of appreciation for what they are doing.

but as for criticisms, i have one that is more of an observation - our school is crazy expensive, and like a lot of moms i am struggling with the idea of 2 kids tuition for the next 10 years. hell, i'm struggling with the idea of next month's tuition, let's be honest!

but my criticism is how many schools are able to keep older kids. our school goes up to age 12, but the elementary class is so much smaller than the 3-6 year old class. and i have a sense that this happens to a lot of montessori schools - the preschool program is a lot more popular than the older kids program, because people either can't afford it or they think of montessori as a pre-school, not for the longer term.

so i personally would love to see my kids attend longer, all the way to age 12, but i don't know how i feel about paying big bucks for an elementary class of like 20 kids age 6 to 12, vs. a larger school where there is more social interaction.

[NorCal Mama]

Fortunately, at my sons Montessori school, there is no tuition, it's a charter school. Another thing, I like is that it goes up to age 16. A lot of people around where I live are into non-public-school methods of learning.

[kaydee]

so i personally would love to see my kids attend longer, all the way to age 12, but i don't know how i feel about paying big bucks for an elementary class of like 20 kids age 6 to 12, vs. a larger school where there is more social interaction.

Wow--am I understanding right? Your school has just one classroom for 6-12, rather than a 6-9 and a 9-12? i haven't heard of that arrangement before.

I'm also in Northern CA and we also have a charter Montessori school, but right now it only goes up to age 12 (grade 8).

[placenta]

sorry - that was confusing, it's AGE 3-6 in the class my son is in, and age 6-12 in the elementary class. i live in north oakland, and i don't know of any charter montessori schools around here - i WISH there was one!

[kaydee]

sorry - that was confusing, it's AGE 3-6 in the class my son is in, and age 6-12 in the elementary class. i live in north oakland, and i don't know of any charter montessori schools around here - i WISH there was one!

Oh, sorry--my post was confusing as well! :LOL

I meant ages, too. From what I understand, the standard Montessori class age divisions are 3-6, 6-9, and 9-12. i had never heard of a class that had ages 6-12 all together. That seems like a really big range, to me.

[Cian'sMama]

Thanks, women, for the really great, constructive talk...I've been dealing with ds having rsv, very stressful. Just caught up on this thread and wanted to add to the chatter:

Placenta:Thank you for giving credit to the work early childhood teachers do. I have worked as a lifeguard, waitstaff, nanny, farm hand, stock exchange runnner and preschool teacher...and now i am a sahm. By far the most exhausting job has been teaching a class of kids. It is a job that requires limitless patience and energy. To all of the parents with of preschoolers out there: understand that it really is the teacher and not the school that counts. I also want to add to what kaydee said about a 9-12 class being an unusual concept in montessori. Sounds odd to me. Always be skeptical when kids don't stay with a school.

A thought on montessori from 3-12:

http://www.montessori.org/enews/barbara_walters.htmlhttp://www.montessori.org/enews/barbara_walters.htm

In response to the posts on charter schools,I live in a rural area and we are lucky to have a fine montessori preschool . The problem is that, after preschool, we only have a charter montessori school. This is a nice idea, a long time coming, but in practice gives some "lucky" lottery-winners a montessori elementary school, and the other kids get the sub-par "regular" education. This doesn't seem equal to me.

Light to all-

Molly

[1pink*2blue]

I run a Montessori school for children 0-3 years. I was trained by NCME (a form of Montessori training that was close to where I live and convenient to complete while raising a at the time 2 yr old DD, rather than drive 90 miles to the nearest AMS/AMI training center). If I had to describe my training, it is more like mainstream current research mixed with montessori principles.

I take what I know works that is Montessori, and add what is requested by parents and the child development community as a whole.

Like it has been said before, every school is different, every teacher is different, everyone comes to this table with different experiences and temperments, just like any other traditional preschool.

My school is not one of those pin-drop classrooms. We have toddlers, mostly 18m-36m of age. We do have materials on the shelves, and at circletime I do what I like to call 'job presentation', where each child will pick a activity off the shelf bring it to my rug, and I will show them how to play/learn from the activity. I find this helps them see how to play with it, also if it is something they do not play with, it helps re-peak the interest in that certain activity.

I change the environment/classroom every month so there is something new and exciting for the kids to play/work with. New books, new songs, new activities.

I encourage parents to stay as long as they want to, and I have an open door policy (state law in California). I let the parents know children will indeed act differently when their parents are around, and to keep this in mind during their observations.

We also allow the child their independant "me do it" mindset to do things on their own, however we are there to help as needed. We are also a 1-6 ratio 12 children total home-school environment.

There are some schools that are extremely strict, mine is not one of them. But like another message said on here, different parents are going to want different things for their child.

I just hope with all of the negative posts the overall belief is the theory that each Montessori school and each teacher brings their own beliefs and values to the mix, and to carefully screen a Montessori school as you would any other school you are considering.

:toddler:

[rosiemama]

I think it's really important to consider what suits your child. My kids were in three years of montessori preschool and my dd went to grade 1 too.
Preschool was fine but elementry was a dissaster. It was everything school should not be.
I had my kids in preschool because I liked it, my mom had taught it, I went, etc, it suited us (and my ds's school was fantastic).
Here's the negitive...with the particular elementry school.
Lot's of m kids seemed to be hot housed. In the elementry school I found that they were not only going to school but also lots of outside academic classes through learning centers. They had mostly been to very strict ("true montessori") preschools and were ahead of their age requirements, thus the expectations were much higher.
Socially dd's school was weird as kids lived all over the place and they were always busy, there were few opportunities for the kids to get together. (Part of childhood, imho)
My dd likes to fit in, being slower or more creative, or not ready for multiplication at age 5 hurted her.
My dd needs lots direction, she got none. M teachers guide (if they are any good) but do not provide much strucure imho.
My dd needs reassurence, M is all about the individual so she got none... She likes stickers etc. M is more about personal satisfaction.
DD likes predictability (spelling at 9, math at 10 etc), in M it was do your work...
I found the kids, not just mine, lacked grounding in fundementals. ie) they're doing long division at 7 but don't know simple math facts at age 10.
After much distress I pulled dd from the system. She learned more in three months in a regular system than she did in all of gr 1 M.
Her self esteem improved tremendously. She stopped calling herself stupid and slow.
In my opinion M suits the child who is self motivated. When the child is motivated and the environment is calm and welcoming it can be a beuatiful thing. Think about how your kids is in other activities, what do they like. Dd excels in a really old fashioned environment, not one that would suit me, but it's not about me...

[Lizafava]

Hi all,

After reading through most of these threads, I'm sot sure I read any posts from folks who went to montessori, post preschool. I agree that it really depends on the child and the school, and for me, I THRIVED. I went to montessori until fourth grade, and then we moved to a small town with no montessori. The transition was horrible. And I think thats a major problem.

I was easily three years ahead of my peers in math and many more ahead in reading and writing skills. I had never seen a textbook, called any adult by their last name, and I had never had any homework. I adjusted poorly to group work, and my teachers did not like me. I could tell they thought I was precocious and wierd (I was). They refused to put me in the gifted program because my montessori did not give out letter grades. I was bored out of my skull, and very resentful of what I saw as the meaningless routines of public education.

I feel like the transition has to be managed very carefully. It was not, in my case, and for the first time I did not like school, and eventually grew to hate it.

I want to send my children to montessori, and hopefully we'll be able to find a suitable and possibly affordable alternative to public school post montessori elementary.

Thanks! This thread has given me a lot to think about.

-L

[Deja]

in that they vary greatly from school to school.


A good friend of mine sent her daughter to a Montessori school where the children were taught to hold their hands behind their backs (in a very specific way) as they moved from one activity to another, or from one room to another.

I love Montessori, and know that many schools have really butchered the intent behind her theories and approaches. I'm sure that some of the schools are great experiences for some children, but I love fantasy and the world of the imagination. I love Santa Claus, the tooth fairy, the Easter Bunny and all of those other holidays that a creative mother can make so magical for her children, and I think that this makes childhood so incredibly special. I wonder if most Montessori schools discourage this type of fantasy.

[alwayslearning2]

Thanks to everyone who responded to my post about the guide speaking harshly and arm grabbing.
We have decided to move ds to another school.
The guide doe snot seem to speak harshly as much now, however he still needs a guide who is "naturally" very gentle. I think he would challenge that type of teacher much less, as long as she also lets him know what is expected and re-directly him if he "takes a detour from productive development"
The school he is at has another classroom with a very nice guide who is a allows more freedom with materials ( trained in Washington, believes that it is Ok to make a fence with the color tablets, as long as not hurting anyone/ thing)
HOwever, it is in the same town as a power plant, which makes me very nervous.

The other school is 2 grand more per year and farther away, not AMI but the guides seem to have a balance between kindsness and structure.

what to do.

[Karrie]

Ditto...I could not say it better.....Same with out school.....

You have to check them out....


Member


Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: Florida
Posts: 134 We are in our 8th year at our montessori school. It is true that anyone can use the name Montessori, but you can't say you are AMS, AMI, etc. if you haven't been certified through them.

Our school is AMS, and it's a great mixture. We are a Montessori school, following montessori principals, but there are other interests included.

The real life vs. imaginary was never an issue. It's never even been discussed within the realm of montessori principals at our school. My kids got/get plenty of playtime and plenty of opportunities to express themselves through their imagination.

Currently my boys are in 3rd and 5th grade, and will continue Montessori through 8th grade. If we are lucky enough to somehow get a montessori HS in this area, they will attend that as well.

You know the saying "It takes a village to raise a child"? I consider our school part of my village!
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