UC Support Thread #12 -- December 2004

[KateSt.]

Okay, Here's the new thread. Thanks Niki -- Hope I'm doing this right!

uc thread #1 (http://www.mothering.com/discussions/showthread.php?s=&threadid=100820)
uc thread #2 (http://www.mothering.com/discussions/showthread.php?s=&threadid=112500)
uc thread #3 (http://www.mothering.com/discussions/showthread.php?t=129415)
uc thread #4 (http://mothering.com/discussions/showthread.php?t=142548)
uc thread #5 (http://www.mothering.com/discussions/showthread.php?t=152121)
uc thread #6 (http://mothering.com/discussions/showthread.php?t=163941)
uc thread #7 (http://www.mothering.com/discussions/showthread.php?t=171306)
uc thread #8 (http://mothering.com/discussions/showthread.php?t=177301)
uc thread #9 (http://www.mothering.com/discussions/showthread.php?t=188939)
uc thread #10 (http://www.mothering.com/discussions/showthread.php?t=202503)
uc thread #11 (http://www.mothering.com/discussions/showthread.php?t=212605)
roll call

andrea -- UC 8/03 story (http://www.mothering.com/discussions/showthread.php?p=751125#post751125)
Aurora -- UC 10/03 story (http://www.mothering.com/discussions/showthread.php?t=152779)
Whit -- UC 11/03
2much2luv -- UC 1/04
thechrysalis -- UC 1/04
Mothernature -- UC 1/04
indigolilybear -- UC 3/04 pics (http://home.earthlink.net/~eaglefalconlark/ILB/ILBbirthphotos.html) (first UC 5/01 story (http://www.compleatmother.com/homebirth/elaine.htm))
citizenfong -- UC 3/04 pics (http://www.teamconner.com/Emerson.html)
Carrieanders -- UC 4/10/04 story (http://pages.ivillage.com/carrieanders/)
Chaka Falls -- UC 4/04
amyamanda -- UC 5/04 story (http://mothering.com/discussions/showthread.php?p=1428929#post1428929)
Karenpl -- UC 6/04 story (http://o-scientist.blogspot.com/2004_06_01_o-scientist_archive.html)
bookwormmama -- UC 6/04
wildthing -- midwife-attended 6/04 story (http://mothering.com/discussions/showthread.php?t=160091)
grnbn76 -- emergency cesarean, 7/04 story (http://mothering.com/discussions/showthread.php?t=164471)
Hathor -- UC 7/04 story (http://www.angelfire.com/comics/hathor/birthstory.html)
Mamajaza -- UC 7/04 pics (http://www.picturetrail.com/gallery/view?p=999&gid=4171092&uid=2143685)
ChildoftheMoon -- born still 7/19/04 peacefully at home story (http://mothering.com/discussions/showthread.php?t=163941&page=14&pp=20)
gr8fulmom -- UC 7/04 story (http://www.mothering.com/discussions/showthread.php?p=1786217#post1786217)
luna13mama -- UC 7/04
Chandar -- UC 7/04 story (http://mothering.com/discussions/showthread.php?t=189033)
Klothos -- UC 7/23/04 story (http://www.klothos.com/Birth.html)
madrone -- UC 8/19/04
TinyBabyBean -- midwife-attended 8/04 story (http://www.mothering.com/discussions/showthread.php?t=158478) (if you're still reading - you may want to relocate your birth story, as that forum is closing...)
violet -- UC 8/19/04
Oshunmama -- midwife-attended 8/04 story (http://www.mothering.com/discussions/showthread.php?t=198137)
lovemygirl -- UC 9/9/04 story (http://www.diaperbabies.com/birth_story.htm)
mellie-bellie -- UC 9/27/04
blueviolet -- UC 9/04 story (http://www.mothering.com/discussions/showthread.php?p=2071991#post2071991) (first UC 7/01, story (http://home.earthlink.net/~eaglefalconlark/birth/philosophy/willow.html))
JesseMomme -- UC 9/21/04 (first UC 11/02, story (http://unassistedchildbirth.com/jesse.htm))
StacyL -- Hospital transport 9/19/04 story (http://www.mothering.com/discussions/showthread.php?p=2109114#post2109114)
4xmamamia -- UC 9/30/04
amyjeans -- UC 10/9/04 story (http://thesillingspage.tripod.com/)
rachel -- UC 10/25/04 story (http://littlelovies.com/homebirth.html#joshie_birth_story)
lafemmedesfemmes -- UC 11/8/04 story (http://www.livejournal.com/users/lafemmedesfemme/110047.html)
DancerMom -- UC 11/12/04 story (http://www.mothering.com/discussions/showthread.php?p=2335018#post2335018)

Ame -- first half of December
laurata -- December (first UC 3/02, story (http://smartaustin.com/~laura/unabirth.html) )
Lula's Mom -- December
AmyD -- EDD December 7th
nikirj -- EDD December 30
Asheville Mama -- EDD January 1 2005
mamamaya -- mid January 2005
zonapellucida -- late January 2005
Chiromom -- Jan/Feb 2005 (first UC 2/03 story (http://mothering.com/discussions/showthread.php?t=42323))
Dandylion -- Jan/Feb 2005
Mama2Lennon -- Jan/Feb 2005
Hayliesmom -- February 2005
mehndi mama -- late February 2005
KateSt. -- February 2005
rainbowmoon -- April 2005
FreeRangeMama -- April 2005 (first UC 9/03)
carlasher -- mid March 2005
sprinkle pocket -- late March 2005
Selissa -- June/July 2005
ChildoftheMoon (Brandi) -- late August 2005


Please PM me to make changes.

[KateSt.]

It's December, ladies! Niki -- thanks for you help.

Amy -- Anxiously awaiting your post!!!!

[TRIBE]

I made it over!

December has already been a super sucky month *blech* Wed I pulled som emuscles in my back, my entire left side was in so much pain all i could do was lay down on a heating pad. Thursday was a little better, enough that I could do some mild housework. Today I over did it and my back is killing me again. I hate Fridays, grocery shopping, mommy & me gymnastics, play group all right on top of each other. There are only 2 classes left to gymnastics and then I think I am going to drop the class until after this baby is born. Its either that or drop playgroup and really we all benefit from playgroup most since I also have other kids that are homeschooled.

Oh yeah also on Wed I got a call from sprint to find out DH hadn't been paying the bill--AGAIN! We went thru this a few months ago when I found out he hadn't been paying any bills, inclusding the car note for the car my dad put in his name for me. As of Jan 1 tho his paycheck is going to my personal acct and he gets an allotment for his needs like gas & lunch. I so didn;t want to have to take on the bills again since I have been doing them for some many years prior but its obvious he can't handle the money and I can't deal with the stress of wondering if he is paying te bills and constantly nagging him to pay them. Easier to jus ttake the money back over and handle it myself. I hate that I have to do this, honestly. He is a grown man a good husband and father, just obviously not at all responsible when it comes to money.

So thats my mth so far and its only the 3rd :( I hope the rest of it gets better!

[bionicsquirrel]

I am still lurking about and loving reading everyone's birth stories. I am working on dh about starting ttc. He just rolls his eyes. The subtle hints are working though, I just know they are. Hopefully soon I will be posting here about planning a UC, but for now I am just following along. :innocent

[KateSt.]

BionicSquirrel -- It's good to see you. I'm sure the idea of ttc will seep into his subconscious very soon. Good luck!

Jennie -- so sorry your december is starting off so horribly! I hope it turns around for you very soon. Your Fridays sound overwhelming! I can't imagine fitting in a m/w appt amongst all that. Dropping something sounds like a good idea. I also want to thank you again for your post in the last thread. I reread it and it really does speak to me --btw I don't think it sounds hokey at all that you didn't want your inner voice to be clouded. That's just how I feel!
I think it's great you want to become a natural childbirth advocate. I'm sure you'll figure out what direction to take.

Happy news for me -- dh is finally 100% on board with uc! It happened gradually after I stopped pushing him, and now he's just as confident as I am. What a wonderful, welcome relief! He's been talking to our baby more and listening to my belly every night. Since he's come to this decision he seems even more bonded to our baby. I'm just so happy and content. You ladies have been following me on this journey thus far, so I had to share... :love

Happy weekend everyone.

[FreeRangeMama]

Hi All,

I am just subscribing, and hoping to actually keep up with this thread this time :LOL

Just to remind you, I am Laurie, Mama to 2 boys, planning my 2nd UC this April. I had my ds in Sept/03 after a great UP/UC. I can't wait to do it again :)

[Hayliesmom]

That's great news Kate!

I handle the bills in our house too...but I like it :)

Stacey

[TRIBE]

Kate--I htought having everything scheduled in one day woul dmake things less hectic since a few weeks ago we had the kids in activities every day except Wed. What was I thinking? LOL But i am going to drop the gymnastics class, I don't think Rory is really ready yet. The 2 older boys are going to start bowling on Sundays with dad and Xan will stick with his Sat gymnastics. So hopefully after Christmas things will settle down.

I'm glad my post didn't sound hokey :-) Congrats on DH getting on board. I neve rknew if mine was 100% until we were actually in labor. He really amazed me!

[amyjeans]

hey all
just subscribing, and have a quick question for you.
Is it me or what? How soon after your childs birth did you begin menses?
Even with agressive b-feeding-I thought I would have at least 5-6 months of freedom, but not the case. 7 weeks for both my babes.
:irked:
Why is that?
One the good side- we can start ttc again! :wink
Thanks for your input!

[majazama]

jenniebug~ wow, you have 4 boys??! :Bow Do you think you'll have another boy with this one? My cousin just had her 4th boy (a suprise) I guess if you have a girl this time, she sure will have alot of people looking out for her!

[Dandylion]

Hello everyone. I'm at 32 weeks and last night I was experiencing some menstrual-like cramps and was hoping to get some feedback on them. I didn't feel particularly worried about it at the time, but I've never experienced anything like that this early, so wondered if anyone else had. They were not regular and they lasted about 30 minutes or so (or maybe longer, I'm not totally sure because I went to bed and though I could still feel it and it kept me from deep sleep, I was mostly asleep). They did hurt and they felt just like the beginning of my last two labors, only not regular. I had had a pretty active day with a lot more activity than I normally have, so I wonder if that may have contributed. I'm feeling fine today and haven't felt anything more. Anyone have any insight? Thanks.

[indigolilybear]

JUst wanted to pop in and say "hi"! :wave

I am going to try and be here more. Sending best wishes to all the preggos!! :thumb :love

[KateSt.]

Stephanie, Don't have any insight, but I hope thing are okay with you today.
My thought are with you (I'm just 3 weeks behind you).

Hi Indigolilybear!

[Chiromom]

Hi all! I've been incredibly crazed with too much activity for the past two months and haven't kept up well.

We opened a new chiropractic office with a dear friend and I am back to practicing part time after a one year break. I am really really enjoying reconnecting with my passion for practice (especially working with women and children) but BOY am I pooped!!!!

This pregnancy has been really kicking my behind! Between caring for two children and working close to full time as we start up and not really getting naps and just being pregnant for the third time being hard on my body (maybe its age a little?)...I am not *enjoying* this last pregnancy like I had intended. [DH is getting the *snip snip* done in the next few weeks...so this will REALLY be our last.]

My issue these days is: I am dreading/putting off finding out what I have to do to register this child. We lived in Wisconsin when I had my previous UC and getting her *registered* was a pain in the butt. Now we live in Iowa, and I have the impression that the process is even more complicated here. I have had absolutely no outside prenatal care for this child and I really don't want to do so just to satisfy some beauracratic (can't spell) BS... I am unsure where to start, who to ask, and how much I will need to lie to obtain the info I need from the state on what the requirements will be...but I don't want to do nothing and then set off some red flag with the state if I wait and after the baby is born just say "oh well...the baby is here...whatcha gonna do?"

So, to recap: I am big, uncomfortable, exhausted and stressing over registering the baby. However, I am very comfortable and confident about the actual birth and finally feeling connected to this child and excited to meet him/her. BTW...I have about two months still to go.

[Chiromom]

I'm at 32 weeks and last night I was experiencing some menstrual-like cramps and was hoping to get some feedback on them. I didn't feel particularly worried about it at the time, but I've never experienced anything like that this early, so wondered if anyone else had. .


Dandylion- I have had BH contractions like this for months now. I think that I am just better able to feel my body warming up for labor with each pregnancy (my third also) and while they can be *uncomfortable*...no big deal. In fact..I usually think something like, "good, my body is doing exactly what it needs to so I can have another awesome labor like last time". Sometimes I don't feel any for a week or two and sometimes I have them almost everyday for a while.

[Chiromom]

? How soon after your childs birth did you begin menses?
Even with agressive b-feeding-I thought I would have at least 5-6 months of freedom, but not the case. 7 weeks for both my babes.


I have read that just feeding on demand is not always enough. The research I saw said that sleep sharing both at night and during naps can really effect the hormonal balance required to keep you from menstruating. I do not know if you do all those things or not.

I know that moms who go back to work generally begin menstruating much faster than moms who maintain contact with their babes all day. This may not explain your situation...but this what I have read.

FYI: I was 18 months with DS before first menses and 15 months with DD. They nursed about equally but I spent a little less contact time with DD as my life was just busier and busier. I have known women who co-sleep and are SAHMs who begin memnses within months...so...there are always exceptions I guess.

[TRIBE]

jenniebug~ wow, you have 4 boys??! :Bow Do you think you'll have another boy with this one? My cousin just had her 4th boy (a suprise) I guess if you have a girl this time, she sure will have alot of people looking out for her!

Actually 3 boys, Rory is a girl lol her real name is Victoria but I just fell in love with the nick Rory from Gilmore Girls.

I think this next one is another girl just y the way I have been feeling and carrying, but other pregnancy symptoms seem to point to boy. I can't wait to see fi my instinct is right again. I sure hope so since i already started buying girly fitted diapers
:LOL

[TRIBE]

AmyJean--with my 2nd son (1st full time nurser) i got AF back right at 6 weeks pp. I somehwat expected it but was hoping for longer. When my last wa sborn I was tandem nursing which REALLY helped delay AF for 10 mths. I am hoping, even tho i am not tandem this time, that I will have another 10-12 mths AF free

Stephanie--I experience ctx like that if I have done too much, especially around the time of pregnancy you are in. I would take it easy and make sure you are keeping up on your fluids.

[majazama]

Actually 3 boys, Rory is a girl lol her real name is Victoria but I just fell in love with the nick Rory from Gilmore Girls.


Ooops! :blush Sorry. I'm so fasinated when someone has all of one sex kind of babies. As I said before, my cousin has 4 boys (all in a row, no girls), and I was thinking "What are the odds?", maybe something like 2% chance of having all boys.... anyways, I guess this is totally OT... so back to talking about UC:D


About PP bleeding... I bled for about 6 weeks after both of my babies were born... and my "moon" returned at about 7? months with my first, and my moon hasn't returned yet with baby #2. I was co-sleeping and constanly nursing my first baby. With this one, I'm constanly nursing *both* of them, and co-sleeping with both of em', so I don't know when my moon will return this time. I'm way too fertile. I wish I could have a few years beween my babies!

[Hayliesmom]

AmyJeans, I'm lucky and get about 15-18m without menses after each baby. Its great! But I think for me its heredity, my mom was the same way. And I was blessed with the family genes for fast easy labors too...my sister was not and it really ticked her off :)

Shoot, I forgot what else I wanted to say...darn mommy brain :)

Stacey

[TRIBE]

Its ok, Rory is normally a boys name! :)

[FreeRangeMama]

My cycle returned with ds1 at 15 months, and with ds2 at 8 months. I am tandem nursing, so you would think that would delay it longer (at least that is what I hoped, but now I am pg with #3 so I'm happy in the end). The big difference was that I was nursing less at night. As soon as both boys started nursing less often at night and sleeping a little longer stretches my fertility was on its way back. Hopefully nursing 3 will help keep fertility away after this next baby as I think my body needs a rest!

[Hayliesmom]

Oh yeah,

Stephanie I get ctx pretty much from 3-4m or so on. I don't mind because I think that is why my labors are so fast, I'm probably mostly dialated before they really get intense. Just stay hydrated and try to rest.

Jenniebug, As a mom of a gymnast I'll warn you to run...lol. That sport just sucks you in. Haylie has been in the gym since she was 2 and now it sometimes seems she spends more time in the gym then she does at home. I know she's in a leotard more than not...lol. Actually this year she is trying swim team too so she's at the gym a mere 5 hours a week and in the pool another 3-4. Next year she has to pick one sport, I swear I spend more time in the car. Well I'm rambling, sorry :)

Stacey

[fourlittlebirds]

A relative of mine had five children, all boys! For some reason I thought for sure I was going the same route, and was VERY surprised that both #3 & 4 were girls.

Stephanie, this last pregnancy I had cramping from about 20 weeks on. It never got to feeling like labor contractions, and never became regular (as far as I could tell.) Every time it happened it made me really happy because it made me feel like my body was getting itself ready, slowly but surely. I never had the feeling that it was a sign of something wrong, and apparently I was right because she was born term, healthy with a normal labor! :)

[amyjeans]

I have read that just feeding on demand is not always enough. The research I saw said that sleep sharing both at night and during naps can really effect the hormonal balance required to keep you from menstruating. I do not know if you do all those things or not.

I know that moms who go back to work generally begin menstruating much faster than moms who maintain contact with their babes all day. This may not explain your situation...but this what I have read.

FYI: I was 18 months with DS before first menses and 15 months with DD. They nursed about equally but I spent a little less contact time with DD as my life was just busier and busier. I have known women who co-sleep and are SAHMs who begin memnses within months...so...there are always exceptions I guess.

I'm nursing my youngest and pumping for my oldest (whew!), so the demand has dramatically increased as opposed to my first babe. We co-sleep and
i'm home. Call me fertile Mirtle!

:D

[Dandylion]

Thanks everyone for the feedback on my crampy, contractions-or-not. I wasn't terribly worried about it, but it is good to hear that others have experienced it from early on as well, simply because I never did. I have been feeling a lot more BH contrax in this pregnancy than in my previous ones and they have been far more uncomfortable than the ones I had in my previous pregnancies. But the ones last night had more of an element of pain than just discomfort. I've had a few random ones today that were almost the same too and lots of BH contrax. I guess my body is just gearing up! I'm pretty excited. I can't believe I have only 2 more months left (more or less). I know how fast that can go.

[laurata]

I'm 39 weeks, due sometime in the next few days... This is my third baby, and second planned UC. I am feeling so... discouraged, I guess. I have been feeling for a few days now that this baby will be coming "very soon." I haven't thought yet, "this is it," but I keep thinking, "Today could be the day. These contractions maybe be early labor." I feel frustrated that I haven't gone into "real" labor yet.

I am tired of the bouts of frequent, long contractions that peter out after half and hour or an hour. I am tired of people asking me when I am due and telling me I look ready to pop. I am tired of periodically having a day of loose bowels that ends in nothing. I am tired of feeling constipated when I am not because of the pressure baby puts on my bowels. I am tired of contractions that lead to nowhere. I am tired of not having clothes that cover all my skin. I am tired of my belly pressing against my steering wheel, and tables in restaraunts. I am tired of cooking and cleaning and packing.

I should be grateful for every day that I have being mama to just two. I should be grateful for any extra time I have to pack. (We have to move 12/19.) I want to be savoring these last days and weeks. But I am not. I am tired and grumpy and frustrated. I'm not even past my due date. I could have another three weeks. I did have both my girls right at the 40 wk mark, but every baby and every pregnancy are different.

I am nervous about not going into labor before the move. I pick the place we live now in large part because I felt like I could give birth here. I wasn't even pregnant at the time! I could see myself birthing in the big, lovely bathtub that our landlords installed. I've imagined waterbirthing for months. Am I going to lose out on that? I can't afford even a fishy pool at this point because of all the moving expenses, not to mention Christmas. (I think we'll be having a dollar store exchange for christmas THIS year. We're going to be so broke. :-/)

I just want to have my baby in my arms, to snuggle her (or him!), to kiss and smell, and even taste this child of mine. I've spent almost a year imagining and dreaming and hoping for this babe. I feel like I've waited long enough. I want my baby in my arms now.

[Hayliesmom]

The end is near Laura. I always feel that way the day or two before I go into labor. Not too much longer. {{{Hugs}}}

Stacey

[Ame]

Laura,

Thank youf or taking the time to write exactly wha is on my mind. This is number 4 and I was due Tuesday....and at least once a week for the past month I have thought "this is it."

It won't be long mama - I promise (for both our sakes) :love

[Kundalini-Mama]

NAKing

I'm sorry I've been keeping you waiting, Kate :LOL It's hard to toh, & I'm not very good at it.

I'm hoping to write up the b.story today or tomorrow, but, for now, it was exactly like I planned. Very gentle, quick & peaceful. Exactly what I wanted for my son. It was very "normal" & uneventful. When it was over, my hubby & I were both like, "that was it????"

I made a placenta smoothie, which I highly recommend, and my hormones have been very even. My bleeding also stopped at 5dpp, as opposed to 4-5w w/my older son.

I'm feeling fantastic, not euphoric, but just normal.

Laura & Ame :hug and :love
Amy

[amyjeans]

Hi Amy-D
Congrats again!
When you have a moment, could you share that recipe for the smoothie?
Thanks so much!

[nikirj]

Hi Amy,

So glad to hear you're doing so well!

Can you share that placenta recipe? I was planning on doing the same kind of thing but have no idea how to make it.

:hug Laura

[Kundalini-Mama]

Oh, that is easy :p

*placenta
*bag of strawberries (organic :yum)
*couple bananas
*OJ

I used about 1/3 of my placenta, cleaned the membranes from it and cut it up into little chunks (I have a yard sale find blender, not a powerhouse blender). I added some OJ and some frozen srawberries----enough, and this is psychological, so that when it turned red it was obviously from the strawberries & not the placenta :LOL Once I could be sure that I would not find big chunks of placenta in my smoothie, I added the bananas, more strawberries and more OJ. Tasted like a really strawberry-berry smoothie.

A drank a good amt & then put the rest in dixie cups & covered them in foil and froze them. I defrosted them on the counter and drank them over the next couple of days.

In retrospect, or for next time, I will not make the tincture & just stick w/the smoothie. I'll make 3 or 4 blender size amts & just go w/that.

hth
Amy

[TRIBE]

Stacey--That was how I felt a few weeks ago. We have 4 kids and all of them in an activity! Luckily for us tho their activities are only 1 night a week (except during football season) as they use the military youth center for their activties. I wa susing that as a way for tem to try out different things and see what they like before plunging in th einvestment to real classes.

So far its looking like my 4yo toddler will stick with gymnastics. My older 2 who I thought were going to stick with it have decided not to renew the next session and do bowling with their dad, which is cool they all need some quality dad/son time. My youngest tho she is more into dancing, performing, drama but isn't old enough for those classes at the center so I am thinking after this baby is born I will look into real dance classes for her since they do start at age 2 around here. I feel like I am going to be one of those minivan moms that never leaves the car LOL

Laura <hugs> With my last 2 labors I had the "prodromal" labor. I had to constantly remind myself my body was doing something, the labor wasn't "fake" and eventually they would become active enough for delivery. With my last one tho I had this feeling that something was hindering her from being able to send me into active labor. So one morning 8 days past my due date I went into the Chiropractors office and had an adjustment. Whatever he did worked as I was in labor upon walking out, very early labor but labor nonetheless. She was born shortly after midnight. Could be something is also hindering you? It may be subconciously and you not even realize it. I am not sure how to help you find out if that is the case or what to do about it tho :( Maybe visualize labor and delivery...draw a picture of how and where you want to birth?

Ame--the end is near dear!

Amy--thank you for the recipe. I am going back and forth on taking some placenta raw or dehydrating it and encapsulating it. At this time I can't imagine actually consumming the placenta, my mind just isn't there yet lol

[kinsey43]

Hi everyone! I'm finally OFFICIALLY UCing and I'm so excited to be able to say that.... I'd been wanting to UC and working on DH for so long, and he finally got on board. :)

I had been seeing a mw for prenatals, mainly to placate DH (although after every appt, he'd say "Can't you do all that stuff yourself? What are we paying her for?" Exactly, honey, lol.). I called and cancelled the appt we had scheduled for last week, and did NOT reschedule - with DH's blessing. I'm about 29ish weeks, due late February, so we've got some time. I'm ready now, though. I'm really looking forward to letting my body labor on its own. I'm very excited to see what my labors are REALLY like (DS was a hospital birth, with interventions pushed on me from the start, so I can't really even take that labor into consideration when thinking about this one, yk?).

My mom and my sister are planning to come up for the birth, and they are both aware of and accepting of this UC. My sister actually has worked as a doula and started her mw training, so I think that helps my mom to feel that we're not quite "on our own". However, my sister and I have had many conversations and she understands that she is NOT going to be here in any sort of medical capacity - she's here as my sister first, and secondly to provide doula-type assistance (DH was not much help during DS' birth, so this time I'm not depending solely on him).

Anyway, just wanted to jump in before this thread got too long. I'm VERY excited to be here (can you tell? lol) and VERY excited to be having this babe gently and naturally.


Kinsey

[laurata]

Kinsey, I am so glad to see you here. I think about you often. :)

Thanks to everyone for your support. Intellectually I know that my body is working, and it knows what it's doing. Emotionally, I just feel DONE. I laid in bed and just sobbed for a while this morning. The release was good, but I feel really depressed still. I think it's just too much stress right now. I hate that we have to move now. I want to crawl into bed and just stay there for the next few weeks while someone else takes over all my responsibilities.

[Hayliesmom]

Congrats on UCing Kinsey, we're due right about the same time. I'm 29w now too or somewhere around that...lol.

Jenniebug, so is your dh in the Navy? I have a good friend in Groton, her hubby is with the subs. I was in the AF for 6 years and dh just got out of the guard 2m ago. After a year in Iraq we just couldn't risk it again.

I'm not there on the placenta either...

Stacey

[KateSt.]

Amy, I'm sooo happy to hear your birth went just as you'd hoped! Congrats again! I've been considering consuming parts of the placenta, too (though if you'd asked me a year ago I would have said "are you NUTS?") so your recipe is very nice to have.

Laura and Ame -- sending you both positive birthing vibes. I hope it happens for you both very soon. (((hugs)))

Kinsey! Hi! I haven't seen you much on the Feb due date board lately, so I"m so happy to see you here. BTW, you and I are due about the same time (I'm 29ish weeks, too!). You too, Stacey! Three of us due sometime in Feb. Whoo-hoo!

Kinsey -- my dh finally got 100% on board too, it's such a wonderful feeling isn't it?

Hi and hugs to Mamajaza and Jennie. Hope everyone had a great weekend. :love

[mellie-bellie]

Laura,

:hug to you! I could totally relate to what you are feeling, back when I was "due at any time". For some odd reason, I thought this lil one was gonna come early, so once Sept rolled around, I felt like I'd go into labor, and so the days/weeks passed, and nothing...I was getting soooooooooooooo impatient. Life was kinda stressful then too, and I just had to keep reminding myself to savor these last few moments of being a mama of 2, and being able to go outta the house w/out the kiddies. Come to find out, this lil one came 11 days "late", so it felt like waiting forever. I'm actually thankful I had some extra days to enjoy my other 2 kiddies, cuz once Cypress did arrive, life changed so much.

Hope your baby decides to come soon ~*~gentle happy vibes~*~

[majazama]

:w Kinsey! Hope you have the birth of your dreams:love

I sure did have a busy weekend... my oldest babe turned 2!!! today! We had a big ol' party, and I'm *pooped*...

Have patience when your little ones are not here yet, they will be here soon enough!

[Evergreen]

Hi everyone.

I am still lurking.

Can't wait to be pregnant and have the UC of my dreams.

amyjeans, My dd was born the 20th of January 2003and I still haven't gotten a period, so it may be a while before I can officially join you guys! :LOL

[MamaGaia]

Hola,everyone :)

It's been some time since I've been here.It's been hellaciously busy in our household and stuff.

I'm 26 weeks now...I think the last time I was here I was only 14 weeks LOL. Wow...time has gone by sooooo fast.

[TRIBE]

Jenniebug, so is your dh in the Navy? I have a good friend in Groton, her hubby is with the subs. I was in the AF for 6 years and dh just got out of the guard 2m ago. After a year in Iraq we just couldn't risk it again.

I'm not there on the placenta either...

Stacey

DH is Navy, he is an instructor at subschool right now. I don't think I coul dhandle if he was in any other service. Everynight when I see some new tragedy has happened over there I thank the Goddess he had the since to be a submarner in the Navy and not join some other branch.

[sprinkle pocket]

amy~ thanks for the fruity placenta recipe. i've been thinking of eating it somehow, but only knew of friends doing salty stuff with it, like stir-fry with veggies and ginger/garlic/tamari. since i don't eat meat, and also don't think cooked placenta holds as much value, the fruity smoothie idea is really appealing...plus, i lovelovelove smoothies!

kate~ woohoo!! congrats on your dh getting on board. isn't it a load off?! now you can share your enthusiasm without feeling like he's feeling dragged into it! yea for you! that's so sweet how lovey he's being with the babe, too.

~~***~~~**~ :dust ~~***~~~**~~~ patience and birthing vibes to anyone who needs some.

anyone having birth fantasies? wanna share? we can ask for and manifest anything we want, i figure. i've started and i'm trying to branch out a bit, but i'm a little stuck...my mind goes blank when i try to think of them. here's the main one...it's going to sound a little wacky since our living situation is, uh, *rustic* you might say. :wink

the outhouse/bathhouse is finished, tiled, painted and insulated. after a week of warm weather in which i've been able to sun naked in all my big 'ol glory, i wake up at sunrise as it starts to warm back up from the night. i start the tub to filling up with rainwater, so there's plenty of time for dh to heat the water (rain catchment water is cooold!) i wake up dh and ask him to start on that project. he not only does that, but lights candles in there for us and has recharge and snacks for both of us. i go for a walk around the land and stop to breathe with the trees' strength coming into me as i want it (remembering that what i'm doing is just as natural as the tree growing), or squat on a rock, and rock. a little later, i make it back and the water is miraculously hot and ready so much faster than usual (hey, i can dream). i slip in and enjoy connecting with my babe and getting in touch with her as we get ready to birth together. the contractions are stronger, but i'm still flowing with them and not feeling them as *painful*. even though we've prepared lots of towels on the floor and pillows to lean on and have a clean, new bucket for the composting toilet, i stay in the water and flow with it, squatting in the tub sideways, vocalizing some but not as much as i'd thought i would. soon enough, my body starts opening enough to release the baby, and my baby actually helps with the process like she's pushing off from my uterus. i feel my yoni and perineum as they slowly allow more room for the babe... i'm elastic and even though it's tight, my body has perfectly adapted to allow room for the baby to be gently and rhythmically passed into the water as i catch her. her papa lays down next to the sunken tub and we kiss each other and stare dumb-founded and blissfully and what/who just came from me as she lays on my belly staring at us. it was only a few hours from start to finish. soon after, the placenta passes (later her papa makes a smoothie for me with it with strawberries and banana and oj!) and helps me walk back to the camper. the next morning, he gets up early and draws/heats a fresh bath for baby and me.

so that's one of them...for a while i pictured birthing at night, but it's so cold still at night in march/april, i figured i should go with a daytime fantasy. i also have fantasies that are longer births, but this is my short one.

anyone else?

[sprinkle pocket]

http://pages.ivillage.com/unassistedchildbirth/misc/bclaws/nm.html

just found this link elsewhere on mdc. it covers alot of the states laws about getting a birth cert. i found out my state is easy and has a clause for births not attended by a *professional*!! yea!

[KateSt.]

Sprinkle Pocket -- what a beautiful vision of your birth! Thanks so much for sharing it, I just loved reading it...and will probably reread it.

[Hayliesmom]

Sprinkle Pocket, I loved your story too, so peaceful! And thanks for the link.

Stacey

[Mama2Lennon]

I haven't been able to be online in some time ... just subscribing to the new thread. I had some questions but unfortunately I posted them at the end of the month! When I get a chance, I will pose them again. Hope everyone is doing well!!!! :love

[Ame]

I started feeling pressure around 6 PM and a sense of urgency - I am now having contractions that last 45 seconds to a minute every 6 minutes...and I keep crying (not because it hurts - hormones I guess - these contrax don't hurt - just feel like cramps)

I'll keep you posted on the progress...



This feels EXACTLY like it did with Lucy...all the stuff before didn't feel like it did when I had Lucy.

[KateSt.]

Ame -- I so hope this is it for you! Wishing you loving, gentle birthing vibes. :love

[Ame]

short update - story later

6-8 cramping
8-9 contrax 6 min apaet
9-10 3 mn apart
10L15 he was born

his head is HUGE (IMO)

it's 3 hrs later and still no placenta

any advice ?

oh and he is fat & very cute

[laurata]

Ame!!! OMG, CONGRATULATIONS!!! No real advice on th placenta. What's your intuition telling you?

[Chandar]

subscribing. wow this thread has grown alot in the year i have been here. pls excuse typos etc...nak

congratulations ame :love fwiw my placenta was a full 6 hours after birth. how do you feel?

[laurata]

I am a little scared. I know I can do this. I've given birth twice, once was a planned UC. But damn! I think this is it. I am 99.99% that my waters just burst. I was in the bathtub and felt a massive POP! followed by a gush of fluids.

[MamaGaia]

I am a little scared. I know I can do this. I've given birth twice, once was a planned UC. But damn! I think this is it. I am 99.99% that my waters just burst. I was in the bathtub and felt a massive POP! followed by a gush of fluids.

GOOD LUCK!!!
*sending you positive birthy vibes* :)

[Hayliesmom]

Congrats Ame!!!

Good luck Laura!

Wiw this is so exciting and soon I'll be able to post about my own new arrival. Only 10ish weeks to go.

Stacey

[KateSt.]

Oh, you're right, Stacey, this IS so exciting! Ame, Congratulations!!! I've heard that placentas can take as long as 24 hours to come out and everything is still perfectly fine -- but I'd also follow the other womens advice to pay attention to how you're feeling and what your intuition is telling you. Congratulations again!!!!!!!

Laura!!! Wishing you love, luck, protection, and peace. Here's to a gentle birth for you and your baby!

[TRIBE]

Holy wow Ame congratulations on such a quik birth! I agree with what Kate said, i have heard of placenta's taking up to 24 hours to birth. Follow your instincts. When I had my dd UC I knew my placenta was no longer attached to my uterus but I was not having any contractions to expel it, nor was I able to push it out. I ended up getting in a nice hot shower and I very gently pulled on the cord to see if my placenta would realise...and sure enough that was all it took, it slipped right out into the shower!

Laura--birthing vibes to you! I hope all goes smoothly, as i am sure it will :) relax, go take a hot bath, sip some tea or wine, smelll some lavender. Good luck!!

what an exciting morning :D

[KateSt.]

Jennie -- good to see you. I know you have your appt with Saras today. Good luck and enjoy...

[ChildoftheMoon]

Ame! Blessings and happy babymoon. Congratulations on your chunky baby boy, he sounds wonderful. My first two daughters were lovely rolly pollys at birth too. Love to you and your family!

Laura-I was just thinking of you this morning and wondering if you were having your baby. I am sending you many gentle and joyful birthing vibes. Blessings to your sweet baby!

Wow, so many of you are coming close to your time. I have just been sitting back and enjoying reading all of your words. I have been doing very well. Dh and I have been feeling the baby call and I am eagerly awaiting to see if this was our month. (this said in a secret whisper-I am so afraid to be too excited and then not be pregnant). Approaching the holidays has been hard, I had pictured how much fun it would be to have a rolling 5 month old at this time. It is just a tender spot though, no longer debilitating. Galadriel is so near my heart that I don't feel totally without her. We bought her an ornament for the tree. A kneeling angel child reading a book. It felt good to do something for her.
Hoping to be joining in soon with a seed sprouting within :)
Love, Brandi

[Ame]

6-8 cramping
8-9 contrax 6 min apart
9-10 3 min apart
10:15 he was born

All is well...

The placenta stayed in until almost 4 AM (he was born at 10:15 PM). I had a mild (more like a cramp) contrax about every 30 minutes, but none made me feel like I pushing and none felt productive. Although everything I read said the placenta should be birthed within an hour or there would be hemmoraging and sudden death (well not really but it was about that grim) I felt absolutely fine. I did not feel dizzy or lethargic or weak or feverish or anything and I wasn't bleeding any more than I would witha period-nothing alarming....just sore and dehydrated - but wide awake. I decided I wouldn't call for medical help unless I felt bad. Thank goodness for online friends LOL a friend of a friend who has had 4 UC births told me I needed to get up and walk around then go pee. I did that - even though I hated every second of it. When I got up from the toilet (I peed but the toilet was VERY uncomfotable and still no urge to push) I stood up and the placenta fell out....no lie - it just went plop onto the floor (we had old shower curtains all over the floor).

After I birthed his head...it took 15 minutes (dh says) to birth his body. He was under water (murky water) that whole time. It was a littel scary because I felt like I couldn't get his body out and his head felt limp. DH jumped int he water and forced me up off the bottom of the tub and got stern with me because I was telling him I couldn't do it and he was stuck. He pushed on my shoulders pushing my body towards the wall of the tub so that my feet were helping me push. When he finally came out he was limp and just like last time I swore he wasn't breathing and something was wrong but then realized that I couldn't open my eyes and told DH he better check on him and tell me if he is OK. He was OK...and he was breathing. DH told me that he had poop hanging from his butt...don't know if it came out inside or outside the placenta but it was in the water he was in.

I'll put everything together in a story later...

Laurata...for what its worth :
Right before labor got rolling I cried and said I was scared...I let myself cry nd it wasn't long before I felt at peace and embraced the moment. I am sure you will be OK. Please keep us posted - I'll be thinking of you.

[nikirj]

Congratulations Ame!!!

Good luck Laura!

So exciting!

[sprinkle pocket]

yea ame!! welcome new little one!! sounds like you had an amazing strong birth and did a great job following your body (and that big head!). sending love to your new bigger family. :throb

wow, you too laura! this is so exciting. wishing you a strong, gentle birth and looking forward to hearing about it! i wonder if you've birthed yet, or are able to get any rest, or if you're "in it" as i type. ohh, mama, sending you loving birthing vibes! can't wait to hear. :dust

[sprinkle pocket]

how about a little distraction while we wait to hear about the births? since we're not keeping track week by week, i'm not sure exactly how far along i am, somewhere in my mid-20's.

http://share.shutterfly.com/action/share/welcome?i=EeAOGrdmzaNW7hg&notag=1&x=1&sm=1&sl=1

hopefully this works...it's my first time pretending like i know what i'm doing with pictures and technology.

also, i heard that there could be a correlation between the phase of the moon under which a woman is born and under which she'll birth. i was born on the new moon and am "due" about 1 1/2 weeks before the new moon. don't know if this is a truism, but i hear 1st time mamas are often a week or two longer growing their babes, so we'll see. here's a great/easy website if you want to look up your bday and "due dates" or the dates you gave birth.

http://stardate.org/nightsky/moon/

it'd be interesting to hear if anyone finds a correlation (or not).

[FreeRangeMama]

also, i heard that there could be a correlation between the phase of the moon under which a woman is born and under which she'll birth.

Thanks for the link!! I just checked it out, I was born under a full moon, as was ds1 and ds2. This time I am "due" right around the full moon. Looks like I may not be "late" this time :)

[TRIBE]

Jennie -- good to see you. I know you have your appt with Saras today. Good luck and enjoy...

Thanks Kate. I saw Vicki tho...I could swear it was going to be saras and a student of hers but...oh well.

I did the most out of character thing at the appt today and I thought Vicki was going to faint. Her eyes popped wide open and her jaw dropped :LOL anyways I haven't felt as connected with this pregnancy. Thinking maybe getting an u/s to appease my curiosity that my intuition is right, i asked about getting one. I don't know what the heck I was thinking other than I just need to feel closer to this baby. Vicki told me exactly what I needed to hear, that an u/s isn't going to do anything for me, nor change my feelings right now. That what I need to do is have 1-2 hours a week alone either just meditating and chatting with the baby, shopping, doing yoga...anything to get myself connected with this little bean the way I want and need to be. My last pregnancy was SO different. I was so aware and in touch and...I dunno how to explain it. Maybe its the fact that I am seeing midwives this time and have given some of my contrl over to them.

Which of course leads me back to wanting a UP/UC. i enjoy my visits with Vicki and saras but I don't like this feeling that I am not holding al the contrl and power, even tho technically I know I am! Ugh!! I also know I would really like to have Saras here in the house, even if I don't need her in the same room. I just need that something that DH can't give me, he just doesn't know how yanno?

I have a lot of thinking to do on all of this. I am not sure what to do at this point. I very much enjoyed my up/uc and I am enjoying tha attention of having mw care as well....internal conflict sucks!!

off tha tnote Kate you wouldn't happen to know anyone around this area that does prenatal yoga classes that aren't say in a gym. I have no desire to join a gym lol

[TRIBE]

Interesting link SP but I don't think mine follow in type of patern or have any correlation to my birth moon lol

I was born 3 days shy of the new moon
child 1 was born 4 days after the full moon
child 2 was born in the 1st quarter (4 days after new moon)
child 3 was born 2 days before the full moon

I am due 3/23 which just happens to be the fll moon..any guss as to when I might actually deliver? LOL

[MamaGaia]

also, i heard that there could be a correlation between the phase of the moon under which a woman is born and under which she'll birth. i was born on the new moon and am "due" about 1 1/2 weeks before the new moon. don't know if this is a truism, but i hear 1st time mamas are often a week or two longer growing their babes, so we'll see. here's a great/easy website if you want to look up your bday and "due dates" or the dates you gave birth.

http://stardate.org/nightsky/moon/

it'd be interesting to hear if anyone finds a correlation (or not).

Interesting...
I was born during a new moon and so were all my girls but my son was born during a full moon. Hmmmm.....

[majazama]

Ame~ Wow! Congrats! :)

Laura~ Hope you have your beautiful baby in your arms right now!

[laurata]

Meant to post earlier, but I guess I didn't get to it. Baby Boy was born in the water at 5:05 am this morning after a short and intense labor. It was amazing and overwhelming. He is tiny and perfect. Thanks for all the good thoughts!

[mellie-bellie]

Awww, congrats to both of you, Laura and Ame!!! :)

My "lil" guy is already 2mo old and 16lbs, far from a tiny newborn, and hearing about all these new wonderful births some of you are having makes me long to experience another UC again.....such an empowering, magical experience, like a natural high! I wish all women in the world would get out of their births as much as I did (and as much as most of you all probably did). Anyways, just rambling....

[TRIBE]

Congrats Laura!! :)

[majazama]

:thumbs yay Laura, You did it!:thumbs Can't wait to hear a birth story. :love

[Hayliesmom]

Congrats Laura!

I went to the moon link and my dd and I were born under the same moon, full, but not the boys. One was 1st quarter and the other was last quarter. I'm due this time right as the moon is becoming full so we'll see :) Neat site though!

Stacey

[Aurora]

OH! Congratulations Mamas! Welcome sweet babies. :love

I haven't been around much but I am trying. :bag:

[Asheville Mama]

Congrats on the new babies...it's so wonderful to share the excitement of the baby vibes! I haven't been around much but thought I would chime in here. It is a little reality check for me. My EDD is only a couple weeks away and reading about your experiences just makes me think...that could be me, any day now!!!!!!! I actually had to calm myself down last weekend because I kept seeing "signs" that my body & my baby were getting ready. I had to tell myself, relax, it could still be another month from now...the baby will come when he/she's ready.

It's a funny feeling, different than with DD. Maybe you 2nd time + moms can comment on this, I go from being really excited and anxious about having this baby to feeling like, I need a vacation before the baby comes! My DD is the central focus of my time and now that I'm getting a little more tired, there are days when I think, I just need a little break before I have a newborn.

Anyway, I am working on my birth fantasy, remembering a quote from Wayne Dyer..."comtemplate yourself as surrounded by the conditions for which you want to produce."

[BinahYeteirah]

Congrats Mamas!!!

[Kundalini-Mama]

Much congratulations to Ame and Laura :baby :baby I can't believe all the boys we are having. Who do we have left in Dec? Lulu's Mom and Niki, right?

:bag: Still trying to get to type up Owen's birth story.

Amy

[sprinkle pocket]

congrats laura! can't wait to read your story...but no hurry, enjoy your baby!! :throb

[sprinkle pocket]

blueviolet~ i've been meaning to ask you a question about your new daughter's birth. you've talked about the fetal ejection reflex vs. active pushing. now with this latest birth where you found yourself actively pushing, and since you seem to think about things philosophically, i'm wondering what thoughts you've had about it. you know, like if looking back it seems you just knew intuitively/your body knew that the baby needed to come out, or if it relates to the babe's personality (as someone who'll need more prodding in life to do what they need to do), etc. having never given birth, the reflex makes sense to me, but so does the idea that there's a really big spectrum of normal.

[nikirj]

I'm still here...waiting...feeling ripe but really, really hoping this baby stays in quite a bit longer.

Shameless plea for your advice - please visit my thread here (http://www.mothering.com/discussions/showthread.php?t=225738) and help me out...

Back on topic for UC - my midwife handed my DH a 'what to do if the baby arrives before the midwife' sheet that was very reassuring to him. We're still not sure when we'll call her. I suppose we'll see when we get there.

[fourlittlebirds]

Sprinkle Pocket, as far as I can see, there seems to have been nothing behind it except a desire to get it over with for my sake, because it was so incredibly painful. I could feel her head, and I knew that I could bring her down. In the grand scheme of things, it was a small thing (certainly much less dangerous than directed forced pushing,) and intuitively, I had no sense of danger over it at all, but technically it was an intervention because (I feel) my body was not cueing me to do it. It is an amazing thing about our bodies, that they are so resilient. We can do an awful lot wrong, and still have things come out right.

So, no, I don't regard her birth as perfectly normal in a natural/physiological sense (the amount of pain I experienced was surely not normal,) but rather as close to normal as I could make it given my inherent and situational limitations. And thankfully that was good enough to bring her safe and sound to me.

[majazama]

I know how that can be, BV;)

here is mama2lennon's post that I copied from the last thread. I thought I would answer some of her questions....
[QUOTE]
I also don't want to think too much about what "might" happen because I don't want to start getting paranoind. Are there perhaps some things that are universal that one should be aware of? I feel like I've heard enough good stories of mama or papa reaching down and checking for the cord around baby's neck and I feel like I would intuit if I needed to do that. I have been wondering about checking for a cervical lip when I start feeling like pushing. Do most of you, or none of you, check for dilation? I don't know why but I am somewhat worried that I may feel like pushing and there will still be lip there. I guess this is why we "shouldn't" push and just let the baby sort of slip itself out ... Any great ideas??? Anyone have anything they feel is important to know? I also don't want to many "aids", mostly because I can't afford it and don't want to be left with lots of EO or homeopathic remedies I won't use for who knows how long again. Is there any one or two things that are really handy to have around, sort of all purpose helpers?

Lotus birth ~ has anyone who has done a lotus noticed if the baby seemed to be aware of the placenta or wanting to be near or touch it? My little one is transverse and I notice by the position that it seems like baby is hugging the placenta. I wonderered if baby was lonely in there and wanting someone to snuggle! [QUOTE]

I found arnica homeopathy very useful. It's only about 5$ and you can use all of it during labour, for pain and afterwards, for aches. I also went to the chiropractor a few days before giving birth, and it felt real good, and might have made my birth a lot less "intense".

I checked my dialation in only a kinda sorta way. I wasn't "measuring" with my fingers, but could tell when I was fully dialated, and when I was not. I did not get any urge to push till I was fully dialated. And I was fully dialated for awhile (as I say in my birth story). I just sat there waiting. then I *definately did* get the urge, and had to have a little intense cry and changed position (hands and knees in the bathtub) If you are in the kind of labour where you are in major pain, I could definately see skipping the "waiting till you get the urge" stage, and just going for it. You should know when you are there. I don't think a cervical lip should be a problem, unless you start pushing before you are totally dialated, and the cervix swells. Just let your body do the work, and check occationally inside to see where you're at. That's what I did, and I had to be patient. She slipped out with barely any effort.... in two contractions....

I can totally see being in a hospital during that labour, and once I was fully dialated, they would tell me to PUSH, but it's not neccessary. Your body knows what to do. Have patience, and the baby will be in your arms before you know it. And trust those *urges*.:)

[Hayliesmom]

So I wanted to get more opinions on the name we think we are going to use for the baby...

Alexander Peyton, we'll call him Peyton. Both his brothers go by their middle names so its kind of a tradition now.

What do you think? The kids are "Haylie" Alexis, Eric "Braxton" and William "Forrest". Our last name is Harbin.

So does it fit with the family etc?

Stacey

[Kundalini-Mama]

I FINISHED HIS BIRTH STORY :banana :carrot :banana :carrot

And for the record, ;) , I'm very proud of myself as I didn't finish my older son's birth story until his first birthday, so I'm 49 1/2 weeks ahead of schedule :p Please read if you have the time, it is very freakin' long. :LOL



http://www.mothering.com/discussions/showthread.php?p=2385408#post2385408

[amyjeans]

Congratulations Laura! Happy babymoom mama!

[Hayliesmom]

Great story Amy! Thanks for sharing!

Stacey

[rachel]

Congratulations Ame & Laura!! Hope you are both enjoying your babymoon!

[sprinkle pocket]

blueviolet~thanks for sharing your take on it. that helps...and yeah, much different than the forced timed pushing.

mamajaza~thanks for your additional supportive words. i'm not worried about the pushing in particular-- since i have never birthed, i'm not really sure what to expect or what i should worry about per se, ykwim? i'm just going to take it as it comes, i'm not sure how else i can do it. maybe with the next one i'll have learned what to worry about! :LOL (totally just kidding)

the only fear i'm dealing with now is fear of authority and i think when i'm not busy enough, my mind wants to fiddle with some thoughts, so i'm questioning my judgement to uc. luckily i question more, the audacity/ignorance of ob's/hospitals, and the methods of mw's, so i'm still doing good in that regard. i think it was indigolilybear who a while back said something to the effect of being nervous, but walking bravely forward. we're building our bathhaus slowly, but surely and even though we don't know where i'll want to birth when the time comes, we feel like we're building our 'birth palace'. even if i don't birth in there, it feels like it'll always be a special place since we're building it while pg and thinking warm thoughts of birthing in the tub out there.

after snuggling me transverse forever, my baby turned mostly head down, but angled to the side a bit and my bladder couldn't be happier! "she's" moving alot more and i think enjoying the newly found space. b/c of where we live, i usually squat to pee outside and she was getting squished by my thighs--had to learn to pee with a baby kicking and punching me and vibing me to 'get off!'. so now i think we're both more comf. and my belly is so much smaller! my clothes are looser and i can move better, ahhhh, thanks little person!


hope everyone's doing well and if they do holidays, then either looking forward to the holidays, enjoying the holidays or bracing themselves well for the holidays (read: family questions about birth plans)!

[sprinkle pocket]

amy~what a beautiful birth story! you sound so wonderful, i'm so happy you had the birth you wanted/asked for! but the "poop on my finger, poop on my finger" bit had me " :roflmao b/c it sounds like something my dh would say! :laugh: so funny (not at the time i'm sure). enjoy your beatiful owen and family's babymoon. thanks so much for sharing your story and thoughts.

[fourlittlebirds]

Sprinkle Pocket, this last time I envisioned giving birth in my bedroom, so I fixed it up all purty and comfy, and it is now my favorite room in the house. But about three hours before she was born I suddenly felt like making up a little nest in the bathroom, which I had not considered at all before that, but turned out to be perfect!

[KateSt.]

Amy, What a beautiful story (poop and all :LOL ). It gave me wonderful chills reading it. Thank you so much for sharing it!!! It reassures me that I can have just as wonderful a birth story to tell in a few weeks. :love

Stacey -- I wanted to tell you that I loved the name you've picked out and I think it goes wonderfully with your other children's names.

Jennie -- Yea, prenatal yoga classes. Unfortunately the yoga studio I go to doesn't have them. They used to, but there wasn't enough of a demand. I went to a prenatal yoga workshop in November in New Haven, but it was just a 2 hour thing. I haven't found any in the nearby area, so I've just been doing it on my own. That and meditating. It's funny you mentioned thinking of u/s as a way of bonding with your baby. Sunday morning for a fleeting instance, I had the same thought -- that "seeing" my baby would be another great way to bond. I only thought of it for a moment and realized I didn't need it, but it was so funny to hear you had the same thought!

I'm just about 31 weeks (I think?) and I've put aside all my uc books and birthing books. I studied them religiously for many months and now I guess I'm feeling ready. Sometimes I think "I should be doing more! I should be preparing more!" but then I hear my baby assure me that I just need to "let it happen." I can't believe it's coming so close!

Niki -- speaking of close! You're just a couple of weeks away! I'm glad your mw provided you and dh with some reassuring info. I'll be thinking of you.

Sprinklepocket -- you've had some great posts lately. I enjoyed your pictures!

Hope all you mamas are doing well. :love

[KateSt.]

Blueviolet -- I visualize giving birth in our bathroom! :LOL Not my "dream" location, but I have a feeling I'll want to be near tub and toilet. It's my Christmas present to myself to redo it in all my favorite colors and make it real comfy.

[TRIBE]

Kate you are so close! I remember settling in around 30 weeks with my UC as well. I was very relaxed and just went with the flow.

I tell you tho this pregnancy is making me miserable. I had no complaints, didn't even really feel pregnant until this past week. The last 2 mornings have been the worst. On top of the insomnia when I do get to sleep I wake up in so much pain I can't walk. My pelvis hurts, my back hurts, me knees hurt. It all HURTS.

I hate complaining, I hate whining. I was enjoying this pregnancy and now i'm not :( This is most likely my last and I really do want to spend the rest of it enjoyng being pregnant, not whiny and miserable. I think I am going to make it a point to either see a chiro twice a mont hor get a prenatal massage every week. Something to pamper myself and help me feel better.

Hope everyone has a wonderful Holiday, I may not be back on until after the new year :)

[FreeRangeMama]

It's my Christmas present to myself to redo it in all my favorite colors and make it real comfy.

I had my last UC in our tiny little bathroom and that is exactly what I did! I repainted it and made it look just the way I wanted. I really felt so nice in there throughout my labour. It was my quiet little place. I gave birth in the tub, which is where I spent a large portion of my 27 hour labour :)

[Hayliesmom]

Thanks Kate :)

I envision giving birth in the bathroom too. The tub actually but empty. I wouldn't mind a water birth but I doubt I'll have time to fill it. I might not make it to the bathroom. In that case I'll just have the baby in the kitchen. I feel the need to stay on linoleum :) I have fast labors so for this baby I see me having just a contraction or two and then a baby.

Jenniebug, I've felt great up until recently too and now I feel like the baby is doing slow stretches and my body just doesn't stretch that far and it hurts. I'm quite achey too and not sleeping well. And I too hate to whine but these past few days have not been as fun.

Which brings me to another question. What is the earliest any of you would consider delivering at home? I've been having a lot of contractions lately and while they are not painful some are uncomfortable and they have been strong and frequent. I don't think I will go into labor soon...like before the new year but I wouldn't be surprised if this baby isn't getting ready to join us in Jan. I'm due in mid Feb. What do you think. What is too early?

Stacey

[Mama2Lennon]

mamajaza ~ thank you for replying! I haven't had much time to be online and I don't think that will be changing any time soon!

sprinkle pocket ~ my transverse baby has just started exploring the lower regions of my uterus, I don't think there was much choice, there is very little room left in there! I actually feel more pregnant now! The jumping on the bladder thing is interesting ...

No pressure from the mw yesterday since the baby seems to be head down. I haven't and don't plan on telling them that they won't be getting "the call" until after the baby is born. I just hope that I can feel comfortable with the father before then ....

I wish every one well! :love :love :love

[paquerette]

Hmm, everyone seems drawn to either the bathroom or the bedroom, but my plan is the living room. I feel like I will want plenty of floor space. I can't imagine anything that would make my bathroom very comfortable (renting, so I'm not willing to go to much trouble), and my bedroom is small and cluttered, and I think the mattress is too saggy to be able to change positions much (I couldn't squat; I'd just fall over!). So living room floor it is. I'm figuring on a tarp covered with old sheets and chux. Now, if only I can keep the cats from pestering... hopefully they have some kind of instinct that will make them want to leave me alone!

[TRIBE]

Stacey
Oh those stretches, eeek, mine has started to do those already. Much earlier than my others who didn't start the long stretches until mth 8 or so. Blah! I got a bit better sleep last night and was actually able to walk this morning so JOY, I felt blessed lol

Hrm delivering early, I don't know. If I was 100% sure on my dates then I would worry about anything before 36 weeks, but that is me. I have never delivered before my due date, I am an ag gestater I guess so early would give me reason to worry. If I wasn;t sure and thought it was possible i could be further along, then I would go with the flow. Listen to what your intuition and baby are telling you. How are YOu feeling about the possibility of an early delivery?

Places for delivery. Last time I was all over my house from the livvingroom to the downstairs bathroom to the bedroom to the upstairs bathroom. I finally ended up in my bed the last few mintes of labor and delivered there. This time I am thinking of the livingroom or kitchen so I have room for my birthpool. My bathroom here is nothing more than a toilet and small standing shower, so no chance of a delivery there. And my bedroom is half the size of the one I was in last time so again i just dont think I want to be confied to such a small space. I need room and tend to get claustorphobic. I am hoping for a nice warm water birth tho.

[Lula's Mom]

We did it! Baby Marcos was born on Sunday morning. I wrote a big, long, birth story, which I hope you'll read here. (http://www.mothering.com/discussions/showthread.php?p=2403209#post2403209)

Let me just say, Amy, I can relate! :D Congratulations, mamas!

[Selissa]

oh no your link doesn't work for me :(

congratulations on your lovely birth though mama!!! you sound effervescent with joy :D

[Lula's Mom]

Oops. Sorry! The link is fixed now.

[mellie-bellie]

Congrats Kristi!! Lots of UC baby boys these days, eh? :)

[ChildoftheMoon]

Kristi, beautiful story. Thank you for sharing. What a beautiful family. Enjoy your baby moon.
Brandi :love

[fourlittlebirds]

Interesting, our different needs for birth spaces. There was definitely something about it (the bathroom) being a small confined space that was attractive to me. I have to wonder, though, if I would have decided on the bed instead if my children hadn't been sleeping in it! I wasn't worried about my sounds disturbing them, but I know that my movements would have.

[Hayliesmom]

Great birth story! Congrats!

Jenniebug, I guess I feel ok with the thought of an early delivery. I figure if its meant to happen then it will and everything will be ok. If there is a problem I'll know and deal with it then.

Stacey

[KateSt.]

Kristi, Oh...I just loved your birth story! I can see myself in with a very similar situation (I get stage fright in the bathroom too :LOL ) in the next few weeks. Your story was wonderful and your pictures are beautiful -- you look absolutely radiant! Thanks so much for sharing...

[annakiss]

Can I butt in with a question? I'm due in May and am sort of planning but not planning a UC. I'm seeing a midwife, my mom is a midwife and will be driving 3 1/2 hours once I'm truly in labor and I'm just sort of hoping that everyone misses it. I feel that if the labor goes on longer than my first then I'd want someone attending, and I sort of want the lay midwife to show up afterwards anyway to do the postpartum checks and all (since we will have already paid her anyway). Plus I know that I'll need some assistance establishing nursing since I've only ever pumped. I definitely want my mom and sisters there afterwards of course too. The way I'm presenting this to my midwife is that I want her to just leave me alone as much as possible and am not telling her that I hope she's not there at all. I figure we'll just not call her unless we feel like it's necessary or that we feel we need some additional support. My question is - does this count? Am I just being flaky about UC?

[majazama]

annakiss~ your mom is a mw? That's pretty cool. If my mom was a mw, I definately wouldn't have gotten another mw.

I think that generally second labours are quicker. mine was half of what my first was.

If the mw that you have attending is really understanding about giving you your space, that's pretty cool too. sounds like you have a pretty good situation. have you already paid her totally, or could you "flake out" if you wanted to?

what was your first labour like? my first was excrusiating, and this UC was amazing empowering and almost painless. I spent most of my labour alone, as I wanted to. my partner would "fetch" things for me, and my mom looked after my older baby. the baby was born in the middle of the day, which I didn't expect, so I was glad that someone was there to watch my older girl.

[annakiss]

Thanks for the quick response!

My mom has to drive 3 1/2 hours and we didn't want to go all the way there to do prenatals, so we hired this other mw sort of just in case. My mom's got my grandparents living with her and two teenage daughters, plus she takes call at a hospital (she's a CNM), so we weren't sure that she'd necessarily make it. She also doesn't necessarily feel comfortable with it being just her since she doesn't feel like she can be objective. If we lived closer, I wouldn't have hired anyone at all.

My first labor was 10 hours from first contraction to baby out, so about 6 or 7 hours active labor. It just bowled me over, so I sort of expect that to happen again. I labor sort of like my mother and all of her labors were about the same length, so I don't necessarily expect it to be too much shorter, though it very well could be. It was a lot of work and quite painful, but not terrible. We're renting a pool this time from the mw we hired. Like I said, I want the postpartum checks still. She will give us a bit of a refund if she misses the birth, so I'm not really worried about that. We haven't paid in full, but we will have by the time the baby comes. We could really flake out and I don't think it'd be an issue. I do like the prenatals, so I'll continue with that.

We have people to take Aleks (3 in fact) if need be.

[Evergreen]

My midwife (no, I 'm nt pg yet!) comes from 4 hours away. My last labor was 29 hours, so I am trying to plan it so that she misses it. I do want her there if it goes longer and for afterward though. So, yes, I would consider it a UC.

My las tbirth, while technically a UC (I was alone when I gave birth0 I do not consider a UC because I was the one who kept begging her to check my dilation and stuff like that. It was somewaht managed by her, though, I (being the first time mom who was at 2 cm for 28 hours) kept asking for the managment.

[fourlittlebirds]

Anna, I'm not exactly sure what you are asking. Are you asking whether it counts as UC if you have back-up and after-care? Well, why wouldn't it? :scratch And are you're asking if it's flaky to not know for sure how you'll feel about something in the moment? Well, whatever. Call me a flake, then, 'cause I sure can't predict the future. :LOL

About the midwife showing up right afterwards -- for me, having privacy in the hours (and days) after the birth was as important to me as having it during the birth. Partly this was a consideration of the hormonal process that continues after the birth. The placenta detaching normally, bonding, and instinctive breastfeeding all benefit greatly from that hormonal process not being disturbed.

I'm curious, why do you think you will need assistance with establishing nursing?

[annakiss]

I'm curious, why do you think you will need assistance with establishing nursing? I've never nursed before. My son was born with a cleft lip and palate and couldn't nurse, so I have no clue about how to do it. I've only ever pumped and I am terrified of having trouble. I don't know about proper holds, proper latch. I can read it in a book, I can go to LLL, I can watch other people, but until I do it, I just don't have a real clue. I have other people that I can call as well for that.

I don't think I feel the need to protect my space even after the birth. I like to have people come visit and celebrate right after birth. It's later on when the high has worn off and I'm struggling with sleep that I don't want to see people if they're not cleaning or cooking for me. ;)

And yeah, that's what I was asking about UC - if it counts if I'm not totally sure if I'm actually gonna do it or not and if I have other care. I just don't want to necessarily be totally unattended, just unassisted. I'm hoping that it will work out where things go really smoothly and there's never a need to call the mw. Though I will still call my mother.

[Kundalini-Mama]

So the other day I was taking a pee, and since I'm addicted to my peri bottle (I put a little lavender oil in it and feel so fresh :p :LOL ) I was looking at my vagina. Well it looked like part of it was coming out. How odd. So I've been doing some kegels and told my hubby about it.

Well today, after we got out of the shower, my hubby asks to see it, so I open my legs and w/o any insertion or anything, he looks inside my vagina, and he can see my cervix. Right there hanging out.

So what to do.

Obviously kegels. Is there a better position for them to be really effective?

Thanks!!
Amy

[Mama2Lennon]

I have though a lot about spending lots of time in the bathroom during labor. With ds, the contractions felt so much like bm "cramps" that I didn't want to leave the toilet, the urge to e was really frequent also. I can definetely see myself going from tub to toilet.There is also something about sitting on the toilet that makes it easier to deal with the surges, it's so familiar , ya know? :blush I was hoping for a tub but the way things are going with the father, I don't see that as a very good possibility anymore. I want the baby to be born in water so I will manage with the bathtub ... somehow ... Perhaps I won't go on the toilet so much if I know the tub will catch the pee, the fluid, the , even bm ... I can always change the water. I have visualized the laboring part a lot but I am having difficulty with the pushing stage (I didn't really feel it the first time) and I am very unsure about where and who will be there when the baby comes out. The good news is that I feel okay being alone now. I am sad and disapointed that the father is not supportive of me, that mydream birth isn't coming but I have accepted it enough to not let it interfere with the birthing.

[fourlittlebirds]

Anna-

People disagree on what constitutes a UC, but I think everyone agrees that what you do and think before and after the birth is irrelevant as far as assigning a label to the birth itself.

As far as the birth itself... again, people have different definitions of UC, but I don't think any of them require that the birth be unattended or no active support given. Is it a UC if a medical professional is there but not actively assisting? Well, technically yes, but I think it's pretty much generally accepted that it "counts" only if that person is not there in a professional capacity.

About breastfeeding, I will respectfully submit that your body knows how to do that as well as it knows how to give birth. :) Having someone there to clinically observe (or worse, directing it from the git-go) can interfere with your instincts, or more specifically, the release of hormones that fuel instinctive behavior. So you might want to consider just being with it for a while before bringing someone else in. :hug

[rainbowmoon]

hi mamas. I have been :lurk: here alot latley just trying to keep up!

congrats kristi!! :) thank you for sharing your inspiring story!

[JeanetteL]

Hey Ladies,
I have not made it through this entire thread - but I hope it is okay if I join you. I'm eight weeks pregnant with number two. My daughter Bella - 9/19/01 (http://mothering.com/discussions/showthread.php?t=61971&highlight=isabella+charlotte) was born at home - all in all a very good birth, but now that I'm pregnant again I understand I have more issues with it than I realized (especially the post partum part), and that I need to work through them before my birthing time comes.

Anyway, my gut instinct has been telling me for a long time that my former midwife was not the right person to accompany me on this journey. It was actually so hard to tell her, (because we've developed a friendship and a professional relationship -I'm a doula- in the three years since the birth) that I delayed TTC for quite a while trying to figure out what to do. There are so many factors - but esentially I need the people who are with me this time to trust. Really trust. And for better or worse, my gut tells me she does not. I did finally talk to her last week, and it was hard - but if feels good to have it done.

My birthing visions/dreams are all UC. I'm always alone, rarely is DH even visible. However, I experienced a pretty bad hemmorage last time, and DH is not willing to consider a UC birth, I've explored the reasons, we've discussed it in depth, and I guess I feel that as much as I want him to honor what I want in birth, I really have to honor him where he is right now as well - because we are a team and our relationship depends on us respecting each others boundries. As much as I feel drawn to UC, his need for assistance (or at least just professional attendance) is much stronger. To be honest, I think I have some lingering doubts as well - and I feel a strong desire for nuturing and woman-centric experience (for pregnancy, not just birth) that I don't know how to integrate with true UC.

Anyway, all that rambling to say that I'd love to have the chance to talk to you wise women, women who really do trust and try to make sense of this all. I'd also love to hear from women who have managed to balance a partners need for professional assistance with your own desire for autonomy. Is there a way to balance both?

So, at this point we'll be planning a midwife assisted birth - is there a place for me in this thread?

Jeanette

[amyjeans]

Hello all-
I can't believe I am asking this so soon, but I have very little patience and when I get hooked on something -like birth- I can't wait to plan and prepare things!
So my hubby and I are ttc #3 already. Now my previous UC birth was a dream, accept for after birth (if you read my birthstory, you'll know what I mean)
What suggestions would you have as far as discomfort of the uterus shrinking and recouping? More specifically pain management. I'm not against tylenol or motrin- but would really like to be as natural as possible.
What are some signs that I need to be concerned? Fever? I'm not too concerned with a lot of bleeding- I'm pretty used to it by now- plus I'll eat some placenta.

Thanks so much for your input!

[ChildoftheMoon]

Is anyone who is a part of the cbirth yahoo group experiencing trouble with it?
I did not receive a daily digest today so I went to check it out and the group is no longer listed in my groups. I did a search and clicked on cbirth and it says it does not exist. Did something happen to the group, or am I the only one experiencing problems?
Thanks!
Brandi :love

[amyjeans]

Is anyone who is a part of the cbirth yahoo group experiencing trouble with it?
I did not receive a daily digest today so I went to check it out and the group is no longer listed in my groups. I did a search and clicked on cbirth and it says it does not exist. Did something happen to the group, or am I the only one experiencing problems?
Thanks!
Brandi :love


Oooh Brandi. I just tried to log in also- it says no such group called CBirth.
:scratch :confused:

I just emailed the owner- and the email was returned.

[fourlittlebirds]

Jeanette! -- how funny, I was *just* wondering about you, and did a search to see if you were still posting at MDC and first thing your post on this thread pops up! Must be a sign. ;)

So what were the circumstances surrounding your hemorrhage?

Amy, I feel the same way. :innocent I have to keep repeating to myself, we cannot afford another baby, we cannot afford another baby, we cannot afford another baby...

[ChildoftheMoon]

Weird. Hopefully it is just a technical problem that gets sorted out soon.
Thanks for checking too!
Brandi :love

[JeanetteL]

Blueviolet -
A sign indeed:) I went back to the PM I sent you months back several times to try and formulate a reply that would somehow explain my thought process on all this, and I could never get out anything coherent. I really hope it is okay for me to post here - because I really want to soak up some of the wisdom and trust in this thread (please, please, pretty please).

The circumstances of my hemorrhage......well - I was unable to urinate for most of my labour (I'm talking hours and hours and hours). The midwives didn't really do anything (intervention or assistance wise) to encourage/make me pee - but it was mentioned several times through the labour as something that contributed to the course of events. I ended up with a swollen cervical lip that delayed progress for a few hours; at the time midwife said it might have been my distended bladder. I pushed for 2+ hours, and although that is not really a long time, my MW told me last week she believes that my second stage would have been much faster if my bladder had been empty, and then I hemorrhaged, also likely due to my bladder (I ended up with two shots of pit, methergine, "massage" hard enough to leave me bruised and with my abdomen swollen like I was six months pregnant again, and a catheter to empty my bladder - which hurt for months after everything else had healed). It was all handled very professionally and calmly - and so at the time (and for most of the three years since) I figured I didn't have anything to work though, no trauma, no lingering affects. Surprise ;)

Other factors that make me antsy about third stage: I have a septate uterus, which can lead to bleeding if the placental attachment site overlays the septum (low or no musculature to help it clamp down). No idea if this was the case, but I doubt it, as an early ultrasound for bleeding had noted a low-lying placenta - but still, it's there in my mind, and I am sure, in my husbands mind as well.

Psychologically - I'm very affected by one factor, and this may be the hugest thing that lead me away from my former MW. My third stage started fairly soon after Bella was born, cord was not cut; we were still loving each other in the birth pool. When I looked between my legs and noticed my placenta was partially out of my body, my MW had me hold it in - said it was not safe to deliver placenta in water (risk of water embolism - which I now know is a theoretical but never documented risk and that most caregivers allow third stage in water). Anyway, I held my placenta in while the cord was clamped and cut, MW dried and wrapped up Bella, transferred her to DH and then helped me out of the pool. It fell out as soon as I stood up, and then the hemorrhage started soon afterwards. I know now that the act of interfering with the timing of the third stage, with stopping it from happening, with HOLDING my placenta inside my body when it wanted to come out and then experiencing the hemorrhage and all accompanying interventions had great effect on me inside. I get really tense when I read or watch birth stories/videos and there is ANY interference during the third stage. I want whoever is with me to be totally hands off at this point, and I worry that I'll hold back from this part because of my experience last time.

The MW I thought we were going to work with this time summed things up like this...."You don't trust midwives, and I am one. You don't trust unassisted birth, so you are settling for a midwife". Hard to hear - but possibly true?

Gosh - are you sure you want me in this thread - I've got issues :) Where do I go from here?

Jeanette

[Hayliesmom]

Jeanette, I think its great for you to post here :)

Stacey

[KateSt.]

Jeanette, I agree that you absolutely belong here! I doubt there is one mama among us who hasn't experienced some sort of doubt at some point. Welcome!

[majazama]

jeanette~everyone here, i believe, has had some sort of issue or doubt in their UC, that's why it's called the UC "support" thread. Sounds like your first birth could have been a lot simpler if you were allowed to do what your body wanted. .. like going pee when you felt the urge, and birthing your placenta when it wanted to be birthed. there are a lot of good "home remedies" for hemorrage... motherwort tincture, taking a few bites of that placenta... and there is probably some homeopathy for hemmorage as well.

you will probably get many more helpful replies, so I'll leave it at that.:)

[fourlittlebirds]

Jeanette, for now I'm going to just put in a brief word about the importance of not disturbing the hormonal process -- there may have been other things going on there, but I think this is one of the first things you should look at in depth. If the mother is disturbed in any way -- lights, conversation, direction, inhibition, clinical touch, the feeling of being observed, etc. -- her hormones will not be released in the right amounts and at the right times. This is a neocortex/primal brain conflict -- hormones are regulated by the primal brain, so anything that stimulates the neocortex interferes with that. Okay, you probably know all that already. But it bears a reminder, I think, that it's as important during third stage as in any other part of the labor. Michel Odent writes that ideally, Immediately after the birth of the baby the main preoccupation of such midwives is the release by the mother of a high peak of oxytocin because it is necessary for safe delivery of the placenta and is the hormone of love.

They first make sure the room is warm enough. During the third stage women never complain that it is too hot. If they are shivering, it means the place is not warm enough. In the case of a homebirth, the only important tool to prepare is a transportable heater that can be plugged in any place and at any time and can be used to warm blankets or towels. Their other goal is to make sure the mother is not distracted at all while looking at the baby’s eyes and feeling contact with the baby’s skin. There are countless avoidable ways of distracting mother and baby at that stage. The mother can be distracted because she feels observed or guided, because somebody is talking, because the birth attendant wants to cut the cord before the delivery of the placenta, because the telephone rings, or because a light is suddenly switched on, etc. At that stage, after a birth in physiological conditions, the mother is still in a particular state of consciousness, as if "on another planet." Her neocortex is still more or less at rest. The watchword should be, "Don’t wake up the mother!"

[MamaGaia]

Oooh Brandi. I just tried to log in also- it says no such group called CBirth.
:scratch :confused:

I just emailed the owner- and the email was returned.

There's a discussion going on at the UC LJ community here : http://www.livejournal.com/community/unassistedbirth/128872.html

Hope that helps a bit.

[JeanetteL]

Thanks so much for the welcome - it feels so good to know I have somewhere to come to help me sort out all my feelings.

Mamajaza:
Sounds like your first birth could have been a lot simpler if you were allowed to do what your body wanted. .. like going pee when you felt the urge, and birthing your placenta when it wanted to be birthed.

You know - I guess it is impossible to say if it would have changed anything, but I think that at least I wouldn't have had all these questions and these lingering issues. Regarding the pee though - the problem was that I didn't have the urge (I think I said in my birth story - after peeing every ten seconds for nine months, this didn't seem so bad at the time) :)

Blueviolet:
Thanks for sharing your thoughts, you really seem to have a way of getting to the bottom of things. I wish I could remember when the inability to pee started - I think it was before the midwives arrived, but I went through a stressful period when DH was gone for several hours to bring my family to a hotel - perhaps even that was enough to upset the balance, and things just continued from there. You know - until I read that, I never really considered that part of my inabilty to pee might simply have been the presence of observers (even if they weren't in the room, I suppose knowing someone is waiting for a report on your bladder activities is enough).

Re: third stage - now that I think of it, the overhead lights were turned on in the room as the sun went down, and they were on full force during the hemmorage. So many factors to consider (in my birth visualizations, it is always dark).

Keep coming up with your thoughts and questions, it is not so much that I WANT to pick apart my entire birth experience (link is in my first post here, in case you want to read the entire LONG thing) but I think at this point I almost HAVE to try and look at it through different eyes, to really understand where all my feelings are coming from.

Thanks again
Jeanette

[majazama]

jeannette... sorry, I didn't read your birth story, so I assumed that you were'nt allowed to go pee.

I was thinking about the idea that if the third stage is disturbed, then that's when you are more likely to hemmorhage, and I realize that's probably why I started bleeding while I was sitting there in bliss in the bathtub after giving birth. My mom ( who was awesome the whole time, never had doubts that I could do it, so I hate to b*tch about it) said "it's a girl!", and mentioned that maybe she wanted to nurse. It's like "wake up! The baby needs you :eyesroll " .As soon as she said those things, or right after, the tub started filling with blood (which looks like alot while your in the water). So I took a few dropperfuls of motherwort tincture, and was fine. But maybe I know why I started to bleed so much.

anyways.

[fourlittlebirds]

MamaGaia, that link doesn't work. Here's another one at LJ, with links to a couple of temporary CBirth groups: http://www.livejournal.com/community/unassistedbirth/128605.html

[JeanetteL]

Mamajaza,
It's okay, easy mistake!

Very interesting to read about your experience. I'm really going to have to go back and watch my birth video again, but it seems like there was a LOT of activity right after the birth, lots of "talk to your baby", "rub your baby", and the midwives checking heart rates, pouring water on her, things like that (which of course, is part of the job I hired them for). It is funny how I never gave thought to those things before coming here - just took them as part of the deal (much like a hospital birther accepts the intervetions/interuptions that are part of that package, I suppose). If nothing else, I know that being a part of this thread is going to give me so much food for thought, and a totally different perspective on what happened last time, and on what I'd like to happen this time.

Thanks mamas
Jeanette

[rainbowmoon]

DH casually told me yesterday that maybe I should "see a dr.". I am 7 weeks pg and totally set on having a UP if all goes well. I don't understand what his concern is exactly and he doesn't seem to know either (he told me just to see if everything is ok). I guess he means an US but I am not planning one. I told him unless I'm bleeding or need a dr. we are not seeing dr. I will be a VBAC though and was recently telling him about uterine rupture, I think it scared him a bit with that. :shrug

so right now I think he is getting cold feet. :( how do I deal with this? has anyone out there been through this with your SO/DH? What did you do to make them feel more at ease?

[MamaGaia]

DH casually told me yesterday that maybe I should "see a dr.". I am 7 weeks pg and totally set on having a UP if all goes well. I don't understand what his concern is exactly and he doesn't seem to know either (he told me just to see if everything is ok). I guess he means an US but I am not planning one. I told him unless I'm bleeding or need a dr. we are not seeing dr. I will be a VBAC though and was recently telling him about uterine rupture, I think it scared him a bit with that. :shrug

so right now I think he is getting cold feet. :( how do I deal with this? has anyone out there been through this with your SO/DH? What did you do to make them feel more at ease?


Mine is very pro-UP/UC and but I've had a couple of really big weight gain jumps that are causing him to be a bit concerned and he mentioned that he would like me to make an appointment to see the midwife. His concern is that it's twins again and basically, he just wants to be prepared if it is because that kind of makes it a bit of a different ball game.

I guess all the advice I can offer is to provide him with as much positive info that you can find, articles that debunk the fear tactics,etc. and just lots of affirmation that everything will be fine and that you (and your body) knows what it's doing :)


Oh...btw....Mine will also be a VBAC (my 3rd...wait...no,4th,i guess technically) and last week, I suddenly had a panic with thought of uterine rupture and dh was the one to tell me how ridiculous I was being LOL (where everyone else was of course feeding into my fear.grrrr)

[MamaGaia]

MamaGaia, that link doesn't work. Here's another one at LJ, with links to a couple of temporary CBirth groups: http://www.livejournal.com/community/unassistedbirth/128605.html

yeah, that thread was deleted after I posted the link...but it was in the same community
:thumb

[ChildoftheMoon]

Just wanted to come here and wish everyone a very happy season!!!!
And to share with you our wonderful news.......................

We are expecting a new little one to join us the end of August! :love
I am so happy and excited. It feels so right and good and strong.
Love to you,
Brandi :love

[rainbowmoon]

Thanks for the advice Rebecca. I do think I freaked him out about by telling him about uterine rupture :innocent but I wanted him to be aware of it.

we are going to get some UC videos soon though so I hope he can understand a bit better of what I want for this birth. (The only one's he's seen are highly medicalized)

anyone know where I might dig up some articles about UP?

[Evergreen]

Just wanted to come here and wish everyone a very happy season!!!!
And to share with you our wonderful news.......................

We are expecting a new little one to join us the end of August! :love
I am so happy and excited. It feels so right and good and strong.
Love to you,
Brandi :love

Brandi, I am so happy for you! :love :throb :Hug :grouphug :hug :) :jumpers: :hearts :lady :kitty :belly :+ :baby :dust :storkboy :makebaby: :storkgirl :sticky :binky :girlpin :boypin :boc :couple :flower :diaper :sunshine :balloons :champagne :carrot :banana

I will be ttc the end of August hopefully, so maybe your birth and my conception will be a passing of the torch so to speak.

Enjoy your pregnancy and I hope to see a lot of you on this thread.

[Kundalini-Mama]

nak

Brandi,

I am overjoyed to hear your news!!! What a great Christmas present :love

Amy

[fourlittlebirds]

Brandi, I am thrilled for you! :love :hug

Re: CBirth, there are no answers yet (to be made public, anyway,) but a new group has been set up here: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/c-birth/, and as high-volume ever, even with it reduced to 100 members, I still can't keep up, lol!

[ChildoftheMoon]

Thank you mamas! :love And, yes, I will be on this thread a lot more now. :)
Brandi :love

[nikirj]

Just wanted to let all you wonderful people here know that Naomi was born, a midwife-assisted home waterbirth. The story is here (http://www.mothering.com/discussions/showthread.php?p=2431387#post2431387) for anyone interested :).

[ChildoftheMoon]

Beautiful Niki! What a peaceful birth. Happy babymoon to you!
Love, Brandi :love

[Hayliesmom]

Great story Nicki!

Congrats Brandi!

Christmas is over, now I can concentrate on getting ready for Peyton's arrival :) We co-sleep so I don't need any baby furniture. I have the carseats already. I need a few more newborn and small diapers. But mostly I have an urge to splurge on a good stroller. Not really sure why because my babies are always in the sling or trekker. Anybody else feel the need to buy something they don't really need?

Stacey

[rainbowmoon]

congrats to both Brandi & Niki! :love

[mwherbs]

I'm really going to have to go back and watch my birth video again, but it seems like there was a LOT of activity right after the birth, lots of "talk to your baby", "rub your baby", and the midwives checking heart rates, pouring water on her, things like that (which of course, is part of the job I hired them for).

Michelle Odent is a friend of a midwife who lives south of here she has known him for over 20 years, several years ago she had him come and talk with us, because it is a small community and I guess because it was too far for midwives from Phoenix to drive down we had a very small gathering with him. He was talking about maternal hemorrhage and bonding behavior and the negative effect of distractions. Because of my own birth experiences I like to be quiet at births and I usually wait to listen to a baby with a stethoscope until later unless a baby doesn't look well. but if mom is being distracted I will say something about the baby, so she will stay tuned in.

[mwherbs]

DH casually told me yesterday that maybe I should "see a dr.". I am 7 weeks pg and totally set on having a UP if all goes well. I don't understand what his concern is exactly and he doesn't seem to know either (he told me just to see if everything is ok). I guess he means an US but I am not planning one. I told him unless I'm bleeding or need a dr. we are not seeing dr. I will be a VBAC though and was recently telling him about uterine rupture, I think it scared him a bit with that. :shrug

so right now I think he is getting cold feet. :( how do