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mommybytheWord
03-14-2005, 07:14 AM
I have herd a few horror stories this past few weeks about how adding child number 3 is so hard? I am so excited, we have been trying for this baby for a long time. I was so excited and I figured what is so hard about adding one more? It is frusterating that I am so happy and my hus is excited too, and people keep putting down the idea of a third child. Can I get some possitive advise?
Thank you!

Mommy for Lindy(5) and Noah(2)
Homeschooling and cloth diapering SAHM! :wave :hang




aishy
03-14-2005, 07:48 AM
Three was easier than 2. EXCEPT that my 2nd child is spirited & he was overly jealous. We *thought* we were prepared for that but we weren't. But if he hadn't been then everything would have gone smoothly.

Now, his birth was more difficult (I had super easy births though so me saying "more difficult" doesn't mean much). My moms 3rd birth was awful too, and I've heard other stories of the third birth being tough.

Aisling

IfMamaAintHappy
03-14-2005, 08:44 AM
I have always heard that the second is harder than the third, but I think some of it depends on the personalities and ages of your children at the time. My oldest was about to turn 3 (2 was a cake walk for us with that one!) and I had a harder time with her at 3, during Lily's first year of life, than any other time so far.

Lily is the happy go lucky easygoing child, and though there may be some jealousy issues, I am not anticipating such a hard transition.

I will say, though, that someone once told me that it is more difficult to have more than two because you have to go from one on one to zone defense! :LOL

Patti Ann
03-14-2005, 08:46 AM
Initially adding the 3rd was hard, but once you get the hang of things it isn't any different. I think it is an adjustment any time you add a new one whether it is #1, #2, #3, #5, #7 etc. I've been thinking the same thing about adding #4. My friend who has 5 says going to 4 was her hardest transition. My oldest will be 8 when the new one is due so I hope that will be a big help. I'm also homeschooling. Mine were almost 5 and 2 1/2 when #3 came along. Sounds like you have a great attitude about the whole thing. You will do great.

BTW my 3rd birth was by far my best. What I was hoping for each time and finally got.

Patti

crazy_eights
03-14-2005, 09:53 AM
I think it depends on a lot of things. When I had my 3rd, I had a 22 mos old and a 3 year old. I had a baby that had wicked colic and then reactive airway disorder, so lots of breathing problems. It was a nightmare for a good, long while. One of my friends had her third when her oldest was 6 and in first grade, and the other was 3. Big, big difference. Both of her kids went to school (the 3 year old 1/2 day to nursery school) and she didn't find it to be such a big deal. However, when she had a 'surprise' pregnancy and baby 18 mos later, she thought it was quite a trauma!

ETA: My 3rd labor was no big deal. Under 2 hours of labor, walked into the birth center and had a baby without ever getting on the monitor or having one vital sign checked. My dh missed the birth! He thought he'd walk down the hall and find a prayer book (this was in Israel) while I was getting checked and he came back to find me sitting there nursing the baby!

RiceMomma
03-14-2005, 01:30 PM
I'm trying to think- was going from 2 to 3 really that hard? Um, I don't remember.

:LOL

So it must not have been that hard, I guess. Or I just blocked it out.

Good luck!

BTW- birth #3 wasn't too hard either- #2 came really fast- accidental home birth- but I made it to the hospital with #3 and wanted a water birth, BUT everytime I got in the water, labor stalled. I still delivered natural, but it was 12 hours all together of that labor starting and stopping until I finally gave up on getting in the tub. SO now I'm planning a homebirth where maybe I'll be more comfortable and get what I want.

eclipse
03-14-2005, 02:02 PM
I hope it's not too hard, because this is number three for me too :)

Czen:)
03-15-2005, 08:59 AM
My third was my best birth, the most relaxed baby, and the most incredible sleeper. She atarted sleeping through the night at 1 month old! It was bizarre! I would say three was pretty easy as baby's go!

Czen

Carsonsmama
03-16-2005, 12:32 PM
:lurk:

I'm listening!

My mother says the same thing and she has seven children! She said three is the hardest number because there is always an odd man out.
I agree though that the personalities of the children and the age differences may really contribute either way.

mmace
03-16-2005, 12:42 PM
I think going from 1 to 2 was harder than going from 2 to 3. Of course, when 3 came along 1 was nine and 2 was five, so I didn't really have much of a jealousy issue, and 1 was a huge help.

Sagesgirl
03-19-2005, 01:38 AM
Honestly? I don't buy the theory. Everyone told me that two children would be three times the work, and that was bull. For that matter, there was plenty of "having a baby will wreck your marriage" before the first. ;) IMO, if having three kids was so hard, no one would ever have four.

kavamamakava
03-19-2005, 01:41 AM
I'm one month into #3 and it's no harder than being pregnant and caring for two. I have more energy now and can get around easier than when I was pregnant. But I have to spend time and energy on 3 kids instead of 2. So it evens out. Boy was I scared though. It's not turning out to be as hard as I thought it would be. When all three cry at once, I just join them. I'm not really crying, just whining, but it feels good :D

Ellien C
03-19-2005, 01:53 AM
Can't say from personal experience, but my neighbor said the switch from 1-2 was harder than from 2-3.

Feel better?

mommybytheWord
03-19-2005, 07:17 AM
Thanks every one! This is a big help. I do see that this preg is much easier than the other two cuz I am so busy that I do not have the time to dwell on how I feel! I just go and do it!
:love