PDA

View Full Version : Do you work outside the home, but still consider yourself a SAHM?




abac
04-19-2005, 11:31 AM
I stay home with ds all week while dh works, (leaves at 7:15 a.m.-home at 5:30.) I leave home around 6:10 p.m. to tutor high school students in math (at their homes.) I'm home by 9:00 p.m. at the latest. This happens 3 nights a week. I have 2 students come to my home Sunday mornings from 10-12 while dh and ds play in the other room.
Before ds was born, I used to leave home at 4:00 p.m. to tutor 5 nights a week, so I've cut back significantly. I still consider myself a SAHM, even though I work outside the home. Any others?




polka hop
04-20-2005, 07:37 AM
*

Lucky Charm
04-20-2005, 08:43 AM
Good question, because i can relate to *both* the working moms forum and many of the issues the sahm's face.

For many years (10) i worked weekends and nights. I was home all day, all week, and when i wasnt here my husband was.

I now work Thurs & Fri days. I go in a 9am (the ER has staggering shifts), so i get the kids off to school, and do crossing guard before i even get there.

But because i *am* home 5 days a week, i do consider myself more of an at home parent than a working one, at least in the way many people do when they thing of working moms. and i do not struggle with as many of the issues as my working sisters do.

I am very much in betwixt and in between and dont really fit in 100% in either camp. But i certainly sympathize and empathize with both camps of mamas.

aprons_and_acorns
04-20-2005, 08:59 AM
I am also sort of in-between. I work wed and thursday mornings coordinating special events for a family resource center. But dh stays with ds during those hours. Actually I work really early, so by the time I get home they are both just getting up and around.

Of course then I have to attend the events, and ds comes with me to most of those. I also facilitate a group for children who have witnessed domestic violence, so that is once a week for an hour and a half. ds often comes with me, because the older girls like to take care of him.

So I can definately relate to WOH and SAH issues. Although I often feel I have the best of both worlds, sometimes I get the worst of it too.

Greaseball
04-20-2005, 10:06 AM
I am a university student, but I am taking a 3-month break and when I start up again, I am only going to go half-time from now on. Also, I only take classes online or in the evenings so I can be at home, and I have always scheduled classes around dh's work or school so he can be home when I'm not. The kids have never been in someone else's care due to my schooling, so even when in school I consider myself a SAHM.

I also do some weekend volunteer work...

That has become my primary identity - when someone asks what I do or if I work, I don't even mention that I'm a student, I just say I SAH.

hallesmom
04-20-2005, 10:15 AM
I work m-f, about 20 hours a week-my DD is w/ her dad 3 of those days adn w/ her dcp at her home 2 of those days. I get off and pick her up by 1:15-so I still feel like I am at home w/ her most of the time. :shrug But I still get to deal w/ the work drama...........

Llyra
04-20-2005, 10:18 AM
I work at night about 10 hours a week, as a tutor and teaching SAT prep courses. I need the few hours out of the house to keep sane, and it's really good for DH to spend time alone with Julia-- give him the chance to get to learn how to be a dad without me hanging over him. Also, the extra money is a bonus. I still consider myself a SAHM, though, because I am home during the day.

mraven721
04-20-2005, 10:46 AM
Yes, I work 3-4 days a week. DH comes home from work, we eat dinner, go to park, whatever, then off to work for me. I can be gone anywhere from 20 minutes to 3 hours. It's only right across the street and sometimes DS and DH come with. Then on Sunday's we all clean the place my husband works. I do love the extra money!

Stacymom
04-20-2005, 03:13 PM
Yup. I work out of the home about 15 hours a week, but dh is almost always home with them during that time. Its really great to have that extra money, although if dh couldn't be with them, we would probably rearrange things, because it wouldn't be worth it for us to pay a babysitter.

mamapajama
04-20-2005, 09:15 PM
I work tuesday nights for 2 hours doing some sign language stuff and then again for two hours Wed afternoon. Occasionally I take short term weekend jobs. I definitely consider myself a SAHM

aishy
04-21-2005, 09:50 AM
Yup. I work 1-3 days a week at a movie theater (# of shifts depend on how busy the current movies are). I work evenings after my husband is home, but sometimes open on Saturdays because it's less tiring than closing. I definitly still consider myself a SAHM because I'm not gone during most of the times the boys are awake, i'm still their primary caregiver, and my husband is the one who is with them most of the time (if for some reason he can't be home & I have to work we get a family member to watch them).

Example of this weeks shifts - Sat 6:30-10:30. Tuesday 8-12. Next week Tue 8-12.

Aisling

loudmama
04-21-2005, 10:06 AM
Just want to add a "me too". Until just recently, I was home with DD during the day & DH was with her 3 nights a week & saturdays. Now I'm working during the day with DD with me & a few hours with care providers & working sundays. The times she's with care providers, about 5 hours a week, I think she just thinks they're play dates! She's 4 & has kids about her age to play with. The days she's with me while I work for a Mom, she also just thinks are playdates.

I think a lot of families are doing the split shifts of parents working. And I do feel as if I fit into both the SAHM & WOHM "camps".

L

roundpegmom
04-21-2005, 10:17 AM
I work on Sundays at a nursing home while DH stays home with the kids. During the week, I have two houses that I clean for extra $$ and the girls go with me.

sunnmama
04-21-2005, 10:43 AM
I teach 2 evenings a week, from 6-9 pm. Dh is home at those times.

I definitely id as a SAHM. Even when I teach my class (ESOL for adults), and we are talking about occupations, I insist that my occupation is Mother--even tho they think of me as a Teacher.

bethwl
04-21-2005, 01:30 PM
I've had a varied work history since dd was born. When she was 2.5 months, I went back to my old job five days a week at reduced hours, about 25-30 hours. I did this because my boss was on her own maternity leave. I quit when she came back because I would have had to go back to full-time. Then I was a full-time SAHM for about three months. A part-time job fell into my lap and I took it. I have been working two days a week for a little over a year (dd is in daycare those two days). Now I am in the process of opening my own web business and quitting my other job. Through all of this, though, I have mostly identified as a SAHM. Interestingly, I think that's partly to do with the fact that I dress casually for my job and I see the other moms dropping their kids off at daycare in suits sometimes.

QueenMommy
04-21-2005, 01:41 PM
I work Tuesdays and Thursdays from 8:30 am to 12:00 pm and I consider myself a SAHM. Starting in June I will be a full time SAHM :) Going to miss my job though. I really love it!

lillake
04-21-2005, 10:24 PM
I do concider myself a SAHM. I work over 40 hours a week, but its at my SIL's housecaring for her 3 children as well as my son. So while I'm working outside of my home, I still spend the day with my son doing our normal day stuff.

If only the pay was better. LOL :happyt:

zipperump-a-zoomum
04-21-2005, 10:29 PM
I bounce back and forth- share some issues with full time WOHM and full time SAHM.
I work three nights a week- gone from about 4:30 to 10.
Kaly

kimbalicious
04-23-2005, 11:44 AM
I often state that I'm a full-time SAHM and a part-time WOHM. I pull 20 hours a week at a local University Library. Most of my hours are on Saturday & Sunday, then I do the rest on Monday evening. So four glorious days at home with my sweeties. Best part .... DH takes care of them while I'm at work (he's a full time WOHD and a part-time SAHD). We even work in the same department of the library, so when semester breaks come up and hours change, our boss is quite obliging in our schedules.

So, I (we) get the added security of an extra bit o' money and I get to use the computer to hang out on MDC ;)

Kimba
Who's ds would never let her spend this amount of time online without insisting on visiting PBSKIDS.org

mama2zoe
04-23-2005, 12:19 PM
Yep! I'm very much like you. Dh works during the day and I'm home with dd. 2 nights/week I teach a French class - I leave around 4:30 and am home by 7:30 at the latest. I do consider myself a sahm. I'm home during the day and we can go to the zoo, park, library, mama groups, etc. I feel like I really have the best of both worlds because I can earn a little bit of money to help with expenses - yet dd doesn't have to be in daycare and I'm not away from her too much. Plus I think it's neat that dh and dd have some quality alone time together.

phathui5
04-23-2005, 03:00 PM
I have the weirdest work schedule (well, maybe not the weirdest). On Mondays from 2-3 I work in the childcare room at the YMCA and the kids stay with me. On Tuesdays, I teach breastfeeding classes at WIC while dh is home with the kids. One or two other days a week I babysit for a mom nearby and take my kids with me.

thistle
04-24-2005, 04:18 PM
I teach a class once a week and I work as a driver once a week. Dd & Dh spend time together when I am teaching and dd is with me when I drive. The extra money is critical in our situation, so I am glad to be able to make it work.

Cranberry
04-24-2005, 05:39 PM
Just some volunteer work a few hours a week when DS is in school.

hipumpkins
04-24-2005, 10:04 PM
I am a waitress and am scheduled 2 nights a week. I leave at 3:30 and get home anywhere between 9 and 11 pm but DD goes to bed at 7:30 SO I am only missing a few hours of her life. She is with DH when I am gone. Lately I've been picking up extra shifts to get us ahead financially b/c we have a new baby coming and I will be taking a few months off. Sometimes my neighbor watches her when D has to work at night. Luckily she watches her for free.

AngelBee
04-26-2005, 11:17 AM
I am so happy there are more like me!!!

I always feel judged when I say I am a SAHM. I own a dance academy. I do alot of the formal business stuff from home. I teach approx 15 hours a week. My three kids are usually with me or with dad on occation at home.

I will be doing part time daycare this summer and am becoming certified to do foster care.

I always feel out of place with SAHM's, WAHM's, and WOHM's. None of them really welcome me with open arms IRL because I do not fit their IDEA of what I should be.

I am a SAHM who owns and directs a dance academy!!! :love

jayb842
04-29-2005, 12:00 PM
I work from home 30 hours a week. I tutor online for two different tutoring companies. I take care of ds and work part-time. Ds naps, we play , he watches a movie, nurses and dh comes home in this time period. Sometimes it challenging. The money is great and I enjoy useing my degree. Over all I call myself a SAHM.


Jay

wildmonkeys
04-29-2005, 02:12 PM
I do. I teach gymnastics two hours a week - during the first hour the kids take swimming lessons with dh and during the second they head over to my fil for a weekly "guys" dinner with fil and one of my bil (my mil is in a nursing home)

I also do anywhere between 4 and 15 hours worth of freelance editing, research, and writing for two nonprofit child welfare organizations that I worked with back when I worked ft. I do this at night and during naps and lego time :wink

I love this arrangement because it gives me a chance to be home and fully focused on the kids but when I can spend my free hours using my voice and experience to advocate for and support vulnerable children and their families. It is good for me because I am VERY politically frustrated these days and it gives me an opportunity to voice my opinions about the issues that most concern me with some clout & organizational backing.

Also, if you ask my older ds what I do he says "well, you are my mommy so you take of me and Ben, but you have to help girls be stronger at gymnastics and help families do a better job of loving their kids enough" :love

BJ
Ben 1
Barney 5 "You know mommy, I think I am falling in love with you"