How do you know if your child is gifted?

[allismom]

My daughter is 2 1/2. She began talking at a very early age. Began speaking in sentences (and paragraphs) at a very early age. In fact, she pretty much hit every milestone early. Except for the potty and sleeping, we are still waiting on those ;)

Anyway, in addition to the speaking, she seems very intelligent. I have had many people comment on this. I have read about children on here who do more than her, but I suspect if I worked with her a lot more, she could to. For instance, her memory is amazing. She can remember a tiny detail from 6 months ago of something she saw once. She can count in German, Spanish and English and knows about 15 spanish words. SHe knows about 6 signs, would probably know more, but we stopped working on them becasue she spoke so early and there was no longer a need for them.

She loves to learn. Loves to do 'workbooks' that I pick up for her. Loves to learn to spell words and practice phonics. Loves all books, wants me to read to her all day long. She can spell her name, mom, dad, and cat. Like I said I know some kids at this age can read and I suspect if I worked with her more, she could to. She picked up mom, dad, and cat in one afternoon we worked together.

She knows all body parts, all colors and shapes. All animals and sounds.

We are concerned that at this rate, she'll be bored to death in kindergarden.

She is also very sensitive. I thought I read somewhere that being sensitive emotionally is a sign of being gifted? She is constantly hugging and saying she loves me.....then again, she gets that from me all day.

Just wondering if these are all signs of a bright child? or what makes them gifted? and if they are, do you do anything differently at this age?

[Finch]

I was tested in 3rd grade, that's how my parents "found out" per se. If you honestly think she's gifted, you can get her tested when she's older (like kindergarden or elementary school). For now, just keep nurturing her thirst for knowledge and encouraging her curiosity about life. :)

[therdogg]

Many people define "gifted" as two standard deviations or more above the norm on IQ testing, so an IQ of 130 or above would qualify.

Your daughter sounds very bright.

[allismom]

If you honestly think she's gifted, you can get her tested when she's older (like kindergarden or elementary school). For now, just keep nurturing her thirst for knowledge and encouraging her curiosity about life. :)

THis is the approach we have been taking. No sense doing any testing now...she has her whole life ahead of her! Not to mention, put in front of a stranger in a strange surrounding and she probably would not even say her name!

[BoyGirlTwinsAPMama]

THis is the approach we have been taking. No sense doing any testing now...she has her whole life ahead of her! Not to mention, put in front of a stranger in a strange surrounding and she probably would not even say her name!
My dd is gifted, I know it without any tests. I am a bit concerned b/c I read on a nice gifted webpage about that we should be providing many varied activities and helping her to function at her intelligence level. B/c I am gifted and my dh is gifted and also I suspect our son, her twin brother, to be gifted, the advice to provide many varied activities leaves me horrorfied that we are shortchanging our twins giftedness, no matter that they are 24 mos old. But I know what you mean about shyness, b/c my dd won't say a peep in front of anyone she doesn't know and love deeply. My ds is more of a guy, he justs plows right in and couldn't care who it is as long as it's some cute girl/woman paying attention to him. :love I have decided last week to operate on the assumption that both of our twins are gifted and start doing all the things that have been recommended for gifted toddlers. I figure that I will hate myself down the road if now I ignore their intense need to learn and experience life fully. It's a lot of hard work to research all the programs and stuff going on at the library/zoo/aquarium/church/temple/gyms/mall/etc... but I figure I only have these 2 and I'm not doing it again (having children) so this is the only time I have to deal with 2 yo's giftedness. Next year it will be 3 yo giftedness and the list of stuff I should be doing with them THEN. I read about having native speakers come to play with your children, such as a Japanese girl, etc.. and the children picking up the language in a few sessions and loving it. I have decided to start doing more of that kind of fun activities with the twins, such as we always wanted them to learn German, my dh's native tongue, but abandoned the idea when the twins developed their own language and I was panicked about their ability to learn/speak English before school started and they were labelled slow. It seems there is no way that could happen at this point, so I am letting go of that particular nighttime worry and have picked up this new worry that I'm not doing enough for them intellectually. We do the toddler fun stuff like swimming and gym, but no formal but fun learning activities and I'm thinking about starting that. I would like to hear what other mothers have to say about things 2 year olds like to do that would help them experience their world more. I was a bit intimidated when I found out one of you had a butterfly house and actually grew caterpillars to put into it. I never do that kind of stuff and I am kicking myself for being so lax about the twins' talents and needs! I believe this to be my own perfectionism, but at some point, I also believe it is really good to do that sort of stuff with toddlers, kwim? I'm just not knowledgeable about babies/toddlers/kids at all, these being my only kids at 40 I never had kids around me my whole adult life. Well, what other things should I be getting my lazy butt in gear to do with these little geniuses?? Any and all suggestions and what you gals do with your kids would be great. I am a sponge. TIA.

[flyingspaghettimama]

I would highly recommend reading the books Coloring Outside the Lines: Raising a Smarter Kid by Breaking All the Rules
by Roger C. Schank. He argues that we should not see our children as receptacles for information; but rather encourage their own loves, let them see us learning, encourage independent thinking and problem solving, and make sure they have experiences that break their previous preconceptions of how the world works. It's a great book and makes you really see the problem with a lot of "gifted" education as it exists today, all about scores and grades and competition...it's more important that a child sees the world in a unique way and is experimenting with new inquisitive approaches than it is that they know the alphabet by a certain age or can read by another, or even knows all the continents by four. My daughter did - because she memorized a song about them - but it doesn't really mean as much as cultural experiences that make her reevaluate the way she thinks life "is" for everyone. I.e. some people eat snails. Why? How do they eat them? Why don't we? etc. That's how most scientific and other discoveries were/are made - what is the anomaly? Why? How does this explain a larger picture?

I would not be concerned about letting a child down intellectually (esp a 2 year old) - if they're really gifted, if you make open-ended learning experiences available, they'll amaze you with what they figure out on their own - really the most important thing, more than what we can teach them. My daughter figured out fractions on her own through us cooking together - that sort of thing. And then she wanted to know more - so I was able to talk with her more about that, after she'd already grasped the concept on her own.

My daughter didn't talk in understandable (to the outside world) sentences until 2.5 and was behind in most milestones, to the point of being referred to a speech therapist. Now she reads grade-school comic books like there's no tomorrow (she's five), but she doesn't like chapter books, ever (not enough art, she says :p ). So I guess I'm a little suspicious of many of these gifted milestones that are published.

About school - I'm really picky due to the experiences I've had. We decided for the K year that we would stay with Montessori, where she has a lot of freedom, no rewards/punishments, and it seems to work well for her learning style. I wouldn't worry about being bored the K year yet - you might luck out with a really great teacher!

[Shiloh]

First of all there are so many types of gifts.
That often trying to benchmark, or 'prove' that because a child can do x,y,z its very counterproductive to the child's self image if these gifts become what I call the 'trained seal routine'. I would not encourage her to do these things for others, unless she wants to (speaking from experience :)

I was gifted, my husband profoundly gifted, my first child is very bright, the middle one I suspect is gifted, the baby too young.

They say usually the parents 'know'. If you provide a stimulating environment, and don't overdo the book stuff - so that she won't be that much ahead when she goes to school. Provide her with tonnes of a breadth of experiences, cook with her, teach her to sew, crafts, get a small pet, etc.

Like I said there is more than intellectually gifted, but it is the easiest to measure or prove. There are also kids who do things very early who aren't 'gifted' at all (like autistic kids).

We are concerned that at this rate, she'll be bored to death in kindergarden.
=My first child is very bright A+ but really still at her grade level, although she finds the work easy she really likes to help her teacher or help other kids with their work. Me I was bored to tears the whole way through. But I read the Bobsy Twins before the age of three, and had finished Nancy Drew (the series) before the end of kindergarten.

There's a yahoo group for gifted toddlers. But don't get intimidated by some of the kids if they seem really really advanced. Not all gifted kids fit the classic profile at all. Some gifts take a while to come out most artistic gifts do...

But they usually say kids who start out early don't level out they keep going.
I am now debating on starting my son early to school he's 3 we start at four, but there's more than what he can 'do' to think about but emmotional maturity, the other children, social interactions, etc. He was a very early at everything - except toilet training lol. He crawled at 4 months even, walked at 7.5 and could run without falling at 8 months, he started talking at 5 months, real words...he was very far advanced compared to bright kids the same age who were ahead of their age group.

You can always get her tested although....that doesn't always mean much, it will tell you if the child is gifted but some kids hate testing, some kids gifts aren't seen through the tests.

Just love her and accept her for who she is.
She might be gifted, she might be bright, she might be a genius.
But she also needs to feel normal...

[DanielMom]

My daughter (now 8) was the same way, she was my first, so to me she was "normal" but everyone would tell me "I can't believe she is so young (14 mos) and putting together complete sentences" and as she got older, same type of comments. She always gets along with older kids, when she went to kindergarden, her teacher put her with the first graders for reading I was told she was too advanced to be in KG for reading..Same in first grade. She took a "Tera Nova" exam last school year and guess what!!! She scored 98th in the nation on the exam for her level, I was told she was indeed gifted and will be placed appropriately this upcoming school year...Who knew!! I say just do what your doing, and as long as she thinks she is "normal" it wont be much of a "pressure" to her. I encourage her strengths (reading, math). She does have her issues with "getting" along with her own age children..She would rather play on the computer or read rather than play with Barbies...

[rmzbm]

Yeah, like a PP said, you just KNOW. :)
All my kids (well, sans the babe obviously...) were talking in sentences (2 or 3 word ones) at a year, and had over 100 words easily. They even had approx. 20 German words. They also developed motor skills VERY early. (Except DS2...which is a whole other topic...) My 4 month old has been sitting for a month. :) But, that's not gifted, lol...what IS gifted is that she can already say a few words & says them consistantly. DS1 did K, 1st & half of 2nd grade before I started HSing...he did terribly! The teachers (all of them) told me is among the brightest children they have seen, in K he was multiplying & dividing...however he would NOT preform for them! When he had to do work or tests he would say "This is stupid, I know this & I'm NOT doing it!" He meant it. :lol They didn't like that he wouldn't jump through hoops and that he was a bit sassy. He struggled with reading in school, too. After I pulled him & started unschooling he taught himself to read in a couple of months. He is very bright! :love WHEN LEFT ALONE! DS2 has been reading since 5 & thrived in school because he seems to have no internal motivation but the school thinks he's gifted! DD1 is 4 and is reading simple words & is MASTERING signs, she LITERALLY helps me! :lol
More later...

[mountain]

I'm confused. I hold the belief that every child is gifted.

????

[flyingspaghettimama]

I'm confused. I hold the belief that every child is gifted.

????

Heretic, meet stake. Stake, meet heretic. Have fun! :p

[glendora]

We are concerned that at this rate, she'll be bored to death in kindergarden.

Kindergarten is more for learning "how to be at school" and how to get along with other little kids than for rigorous academics. You said that she's "sensitive," so I'd say that even if she doesn't need the ABC practice, she'll probably need the Other Little Kid practice? KWIM?

I only say this because I was significantly "ahead" when I was a small child and always still the youngest in class, I blasted through the kindergarten "workbook" on my own in the first two weeks of school. But, I wasn't bored. What I really remember getting out of kindergarten was 1) the Christmas pageant, 2) growing "Space Rocks" as a class, and 3) figuring out what to do on the playground and how to "make friends."

[lisac77]

Heretic, meet stake. Stake, meet heretic. Have fun! :p

OMG, flyingspaghettimama!!!! :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

You are so bad!

[Roar]

I have decided last week to operate on the assumption that both of our twins are gifted and start doing all the things that have been recommended for gifted toddlers. I figure that I will hate myself down the road if now I ignore their intense need to learn and experience life fully. It's a lot of hard work to research all the programs and stuff going on at the library/zoo/aquarium/church/temple/gyms/mall/etc... Well, what other things should I be getting my lazy butt in gear to do with these little geniuses?? Any and all suggestions and what you gals do with your kids would be great. I am a sponge. TIA.

My advice would be to relax. The biggest gift you can give kids is time to play. There is no need to hustle them all over town for one program after another or feel like you need to do buy anything special to meet their needs. In my opinion what kids need most in the early years is: time in nature, gross motor play, sensory experiences - playdough, mud, etc., imaginary playtime, being read to, etc. So take a walk, fold the laundry, toss a ball, play puppets and enjoy life.

[Roar]

Kindergarten is more for learning "how to be at school" and how to get along with other little kids than for rigorous academics. You said that she's "sensitive," so I'd say that even if she doesn't need the ABC practice, she'll probably need the Other Little Kid practice? KWIM?

I only say this because I was significantly "ahead" when I was a small child and always still the youngest in class, I blasted through the kindergarten "workbook" on my own in the first two weeks of school. But, I wasn't bored. What I really remember getting out of kindergarten was 1) the Christmas pageant, 2) growing "Space Rocks" as a class, and 3) figuring out what to do on the playground and how to "make friends."

I agree that should be what kindergarten is about, but sadly that isn't the case in a lot of schools anymore. There is testing pressure early and gone are a lot of the things we long associated with kindergarten (building with blocks, etc.) There is an article about this in the online New York Times http://www.nytimes.com/2006/07/26/education/26education.html?ex=1154059200&en=918ba59097a8298b&ei=5070

[allgirls]

Heretic, meet stake. Stake, meet heretic. Have fun! :p

:lol :lol :lol

[allgirls]

I'm confused. I hold the belief that every child is gifted.

????

I think your difinition of gifted is different from the the term gifted on this board.


[/QUOTE=therdogg]Many people define "gifted" as two standard deviations or more above the norm on IQ testing, so an IQ of 130 or above would qualify.[/QUOTE]

Not all children meet this definition...those that do are what this board is about.

[LeftField]

I think this forum could benefit from a sticky note, giving a brief description of the forum's purpose and a few helpful links.

[allgirls]

I think this forum could benefit from a sticky note, giving a brief description of the forum's purpose and a few helpful links.

absolutely:thumb

[Terabith]

I've wondered if I'm being a psychotic over-reacting egomaniacal parent imagining that my 15 month old is gifted. I have a 2 1/2 yr old, and while she seems to be quite bright, I haven't ever thought of her as gifted, really. My husband and i both tested as gifted in school. But my 15 month old dd has been using full sentences since 11 months. "I'm reading a book." She hides things, then says, "Where is it? It hiding!" Then uncovers it and says, "Boo!" (her made up version of peek a boo). She's been walking since 9 months, can walk backwards, draw circles (and identify them), string beads, spin in a circle, and get both feet off the ground when jumping. She picks up on words and concepts very quickly (as in when used once). She does pretty complex pretend play. "Going to store!" Pretends to cook, feed the baby, says it's sleeping, things like that. I dunno. I feel like she's too young to even be thinking about things like this, but none of the child development books seem to apply at all to her. And I feel kinda embarrassed when we're around our friends who have babies the same age as her. They're clearly babies, and she clearly is not. Maybe it's just bc she has an older sister to copy? But one of our other friends has a dd the same age as my older one too, and her baby is not anywhere's near Catherine. It's just strange. I realized i was trying to keep her away from letters and such bc I was afraid she'd start reading at a year. When I realized that, I stopped doing it, but still, strange. I dunno if she's gifted, but the term does come to mind around her.

[Cynthia Mosher]

I'm confused. I hold the belief that every child is gifted.

Heretic, meet stake. Stake, meet heretic. Have fun! :p


Let's try to uphold the integrity of this forum and not post in a way that would compromise it or create an uncomfortable atmosphere for the mothers who have children with special needs due to their giftedness.

If you truly have an interest in understanding the different types of giftedness then I'm sure you will have plenty of opportunity to learn in this forum by reading and asking clear questions.

I think a sticky would be a great idea. and if the mamas of gifted children could come up with what they think would be a good "about this forum" post and some helpful links we can review it and place it. :)

[flyingspaghettimama]

See, this is why I guess I just can't be on any gifted listservs or groups - it is apparently impossible to hold both beliefs to be true - that one's child is gifted, and that all children are gifted. Mine might be able to read at three, do math in her head, have a great memory, and discuss death with you, but it doesn't deny the "gifts" of any other child regarding their unique capabilities, and I do think all children have them, regardless of IQ testing, which I personally think is a bunch of hoo-ha. I also don't compare mine to others in order to find her gifts more unique or better than someone else's. So I guess I'll unsub and stay away, as there is obviously an Official Line that everyone who has a Gifted Child must subscribe to believing. And I already know what they are, and I personally just disagree with many of them, but it's never ok to say so. It's too bad, because I think we do children a disservice by following the mainstream line regarding giftedness, instead of questioning much of contemporary US society's/schooling's expectations and classifications. I wish there were a place to really question whether acceleration, pedestals, achievement-based standards, and institutional labeling is actually the best for our kids.

[eilonwy]

See, this is why I guess I just can't be on any gifted listservs or groups - it is apparently impossible to hold both beliefs to be true - that one's child is gifted, and that all children are gifted.

It really depends on how you're defining the word "gifted." If by "gifted" you simply mean "special," or "unique," then certainly it's possible to hold both of those beliefs. If, on the other hand, you're using the word "gifted" to describe a certain intellectual configuration, then yes, it is impossible to believe that "all children are gifted."

Mine might be able to read at three, do math in her head, have a great memory, and discuss death with you, but it doesn't deny the "gifts" of any other child regarding their unique capabilities, and I do think all children have them, regardless of IQ testing, which I personally think is a bunch of hoo-ha.

Again, you're confusing "special" with "gifted." By saying our children are gifted, noone here is implying, indirectly or otherwise, that other children are not special. We are not denying that other children have gifts, only that their minds are configured in the same way as those of gifted children (http://www.k12.hi.us/~gtstate/giftedness_and_the_gifted__what_s_it_all_about_.ht m).

As to IQ testing, you'll find that many (most?) of the parents who post here about their children have not had any formal IQ testing done, and aren't planning to do so. I would argue that it's not entirely "a bunch of hoo-ha," but my questions to you on that issue were never addressed, so I won't bother rehashing them here.

I also don't compare mine to others in order to find her gifts more unique or better than someone else's.

Again, nobody here is doing that; we're simply trying to accomodate our own children to the best of our abilities. Once again, you are confusing "gifted" with "special."

So I guess I'll unsub and stay away, as there is obviously an Official Line that everyone who has a Gifted Child must subscribe to believing. And I already know what they are, and I personally just disagree with many of them, but it's never ok to say so.

:scratch Funny, most of us feel that the Official Line is "all children are gifted," and that's exactly what we're fighting against.

It's too bad, because I think we do children a disservice by following the mainstream line regarding giftedness, instead of questioning much of contemporary US society's/schooling's expectations and classifications.

This implies that we are defining our children as gifted based on said expectations and classifications. Again, this is not actually the case. Most of our children were not identified through the public school system; it doesn't change the fact that we know they're gifted. We're fighting the dominant school paradigm at least as hard as you are. How is it doing a children a disservice to accomodate their special needs? Why is it unfair to ask for a free and appropriate education for our children, just because they're not "behind" or even on par with their agemates?

I wish there were a place to really question whether acceleration, pedestals, achievement-based standards, and institutional labeling is actually the best for our kids.

Institutional labeling? Who's doing that? As to acceleration, I think that the folks who researched and wrote A Nation Deceived (www.nationdeceived.org) have very thoroughly established that in many cases, acceleration is not only appropriate but ideal.

The point of this forum is not to ask questions about how to turn our children into perfect little soldiers, or little geniuses being paraded around on Oprah. It's to find support for a child who plays on the slide like a four year old, talks like a nine year old, and does algebra in her spare time, all at the age of six. Kids with development so asyncrhonous that they can read about the atrocities of the Holocaust, but don't have a good sense of time so they think that this is happening now and freak out when a cousin mentions a foreign exchange trip to Germany. Ten month old children who refuse to wear diapers because they irritate them between the legs, but don't have the physical ability to pull their pants down and get on the toilet in time.

Whether you like it or not, there are gifted children out there, and they do have special needs. We're not saying that all children aren't special, that they don't all have their little idiosyncracies, but you're failing to recognize the extreme asynchronous development so common in gifted children.

[NoHiddenFees]

I'm not touching the rest of my post; still scratching my head.I wish there were a place to really question whether acceleration, pedestals, achievement-based standards, and institutional labeling is actually the best for our kids.Not sure about the institutional part, unless you consider the "gifted" solely an institutional label. However, I fail to see why your other concerns can't be addressed in this forum without necessarily turning into another (homeschool vs unschool) vs school debate. There's disagreement, and no one claims any one accomodation works for, or is best for all gifted children. However, the existence of gifted children as an identifiable subset of the group children is not up for debate here. You have the whole rest of MDC to conflate and deflate to your heart's desire. "Gifted" has an accepted definition; if you don't like the term that's not our problem and it's probably best if you avoid the forum. Many of us aren't partial to to the term either but, unfortunately, no one has come up with a better moniker which has caught on.

[Daffodil]

So I guess I'll unsub and stay away, as there is obviously an Official Line that everyone who has a Gifted Child must subscribe to believing. And I already know what they are, and I personally just disagree with many of them, but it's never ok to say so.
So, FSM (if you're still around to read this), I gather that you're not just annoyed by the use of the word "gifted" to mean "intellectually gifted" - it's the very idea of identifying kids as "intellectually gifted," right?

Do any or all of these statements represent what you think?

-- It simply doesn't make sense to try to divide people into "intellectually gifted" and "not gifted" groups, because there are so many types and degrees of intelligence.

-- The ways in which intelligence is typically identified (e.g. IQ tests) are flawed.

-- The traits generally seen as "intelligence" are not entirely (or not at all) innate.

-- There is no benefit to thinking of yourself or your kids as more intelligent than other people - in fact, it's often harmful.

I think there could be some interesting discussion around any of those ideas. Maybe this forum isn't the place for it, but maybe it is, especially now when it's a new forum and people are still trying to figure out just what it's all about.

I wish there were a place to really question whether acceleration, pedestals, achievement-based standards, and institutional labeling is actually the best for our kids.
I don't see why this forum couldn't be a place for that. If what you really mean is "to question whether the whole concept of identifying some kids as intellectually gifted is harmful to those kids and to society" - well, that might not go over too well, given that this forum was created for people who think it's helpful to recognize intellectual giftedness. I personally think that could be an interesting and useful discussion, if the participants were thoughtful enough (in both senses of the word.)

[thismama]

I would really enjoy discussion along the lines of what you are talking about, flyingspaghettimama and Daffodil. I wonder if there is a place for it in another forum of MDC maybe, if not here?

[Dechen]

See, this is why I guess I just can't be on any gifted listservs or groups - it is apparently impossible to hold both beliefs to be true - that one's child is gifted, and that all children are gifted.

If all children are gifted, and your own child is in fact a child, it follows that your child is gifted. I can't see the impossibility.

I understand why you have a hard time with gifted groups, since you object to the premise of those groups. Not suprising that you'd find participation unpleasant.
So I guess I'll unsub and stay away, as there is obviously an Official Line that everyone who has a Gifted Child must subscribe to believing. And I already know what they are, and I personally just disagree with many of them, but it's never ok to say so.

Its great to say so - but not in this forum. Just as it is not great to go into the working mother forum and post opinions related to the superiority of staying at home. It is perfectly valid to feel that way, but there is a time and place to discuss it. I'm sure there are other forums at MDC that would accomodate a philosophical discussion on the the topic of giftedness and current approaches to giftedness.

It's too bad, because I think we do children a disservice by following the mainstream line regarding giftedness, instead of questioning much of contemporary US society's/schooling's expectations and classifications. I wish there were a place to really question whether acceleration, pedestals, achievement-based standards, and institutional labeling is actually the best for our kids.

TAO?

- - -

Edited to clarify: It isn't that I don't think any discussion of the category "Gifted" belongs in this forum. What I do think does not belong is the out-right objection to the purpose of this forum. For lack of a better term, "gifted" is what we're using to describe a certain set of children with similar qualities. Taking the word gifted with a grain of salt, for the purposes of this forum all children are not gifted. This does not make them less special or amazing, it does not invalidate the gifts they have and the things that make them wonderful human beings. All it means is that they aren't dealing with the same issues.

[LadyMarmalade]

It isn't that I don't think any discussion of the category "Gifted" belongs in this forum. What I do think does not belong is the out-right objection to the purpose of this forum. For lack of a better term, "gifted" is what we're using to describe a certain set of children with similar qualities. Taking the word gifted with a grain of salt, for the purposes of this forum all children are not gifted. This does not make them less special or amazing, it does not invalidate the gifts they have and the things that make them wonderful human beings. All it means is that they aren't dealing with the same issues.
Exactly.

[Jwebbal]

I found this very helpful in my understanding of what it means to be a gifted child.

http://www.ri.net/gifted_talented/character.html

[Fiestabeth]

Heretic, meet stake. Stake, meet heretic. Have fun! :p

LMAO!!!:lol

[teenagersMom]

Hi everyone,

I read many of the posts here this evening and decided to say something, by my name here I am sure you realize I am the mother of a gifted teenager. My son is 17 and is entering his senior year in high school next week. My son is a level 3 and considered highly gifted. Each child is so very different in fact I began to worry when mine did not start talking at the age the experts said he should be talking. He was 2 years old and would not say anything then about 2 months after his second birthday he looked up at me one day and said "Mommie why did you do that?" I looked at him startled and said "oh you rascal you've been holding out on me". He laughed and said ,"I can talk Mommie just did not have anything to say, yet." All I could do was stand there and stare at him. His speech was very clear and easily understandable I was awed. He however refused to be potty trained I had to force this issue at 3 I told him it was time he said "NO, I will not use that potty". By the time he was 3 1/2 I told him you will use that potty young man and I made him put regular underpants on. He rebelled by wetting all over the carpet. I made him watch me clean it up and told him look at all this work Mommie is having to do because you don't want to use a potty. He said, "I'm so sorry Mommie I'll use the potty", from that day forward there have been no potty issues in our house. Understand he was reading before he'd use that potty LOL From a very early age he has been very sensitive to the feelings of those in his life that is why I made him watch the cleaning. As he excels at most everything he tries I just stand back and encourage him to always do his best. He's in AP classes now and still making A's. He looks at me sometimes and says Mom do I have to grow up? He says I want to learn everything and try so many things but I don't want to leave you, growing up means I have to have my own home and not live with you. It's not responsibly he tries to get away from because he accepts all sort of responibly. I've asked him why he feels this way and he says because I want to take care of you always.
There are so many challenges raising a "gifted" child. It did not take me long to realize the regular model did not work with my child. He's been a little adult his whole life I've had to remind him to go play be a kid. Sometimes he gets annoyed at his friends and comes home saying they are brain dead. He's like I just don't understand why they do some of the things they do. Like speeding down the highway at top speed...he's complain don't they realize how valuable life is? I heard him as he got out of a car one night saying I will not ride with you anymore I want to live thank you. He came into the house fuming and muttering about brain dead people. All of this from the kid who refused to speak until he had something to say and refused to use the potty LOL!!!! Aren't they just beautiful???

[MamaBug]

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