Pregnant despite BCP . . . a little freaked/a lot happy

[Birth Junky]

I have been on the pill for almost a year now. Been extremely regular (certainly more so than when I am NOT on the pill!), up until July. Then, suddenly, I get to the "inert" week of pills, and NO PERIOD.

I waited . . . and waited . . . and waited. Nothing. When my period was a week late, I went out and bought a home pregnancy test--which tested negative. So, hope restored, I went back to life as usual and figured my period would be along in another day or two.

Flash forward a week, and STILL no Aunt Flo. This morning, lying in bed, I thought "perhaps I should test myself again." Pulled out the box from the pregnancy test (carefully hidden in my bedside table, so as not to tip off DH), and read the instructions. If you get a negative result and still no period after another seven days, test again. So I did.

I am not kidding you, as soon as I had placed the test on the bathroom counter, there were already two lines. Still in disbelief, I set a timer and tried to distract myself for three minutes. Went back into the bathroom, and sure enough--still two lines.

I have been in a fog of shock all day today. Part of my is thrilled, ecstatic, overjoyed--a baby! Something I have wanted for as long as I could remember, and doubly so for the last three years. But on the other hand, this was SO unplanned--we had talked and talked and talked about starting to try next fall, but certainly not before then.

DH will be home from work within the hour, and I am getting more anxious by the minute as I try to figure out how to tell him. I think I am just going to come right out and say it . . . I have NO IDEA how he is going to react. On the one hand, he loves kids, WANTS kids, and has even been bringing the subject up on his own more and more in the last year. On the other hand, he is one of those guys who likes to have everything planned out in advance. Wanted to be in a home of our own before we started TTC, etc.

(*sigh*) We have been planning a big family trip to Europe next summer for the last three years. Now that is out the window (for me, at least)--this little bug will be about two months old when we would be ready to leave. Don't get me wrong, I am a big fan of the idea of travelling with kids . . . but a two-month old, on a 10 hour flight? Not to mention the fact that we will be travelling with a big group, who will be wanting to bar-hop and go out clubbing and just generally have a fun, rowdy time . . . I would hate for their trip to be ruined/changed because of an infant.

I'm sure that after I have told DH and we have worked through the shock, I will have an ear-to-ear grin on my face for the next 9 months. But right now I am scared, in shock, and overwhelmed.

Still, glad to be joining the "mommy club" . . . Looking forward to going through the next 9 months with all of you. :love

[allgirls]

Congratulations...all will be perfect! What better surprise!!! Let us know how your DH takes it!!!

[Jillian79]

Congratulations! I got pregant while I was on BCPs, too. I'd gone to Planned Parenthood for my annual and to try a different method of birth control (ha ha), but since I told them my period was a few days late, they tested me - and it came back positive!

I kinda freaked out too, I think I sat in the office with the two nice ladies who had told me for 15 minutes or so, because I was so freaked out that I didn't think I could go back home yet without bursting into tears. My husband and I had talked about having kids in a couple of years, so that I could finish my BA, we could buy a house.. those kinds of things. At first he was freaked out too, but ultimately he was just as happy as me, and he's been incredibly supportive every moment.

The way I look at it is that this baby really wants to be born! Everything else will work itself out. :)

Again, congratulations! :balloons It sounds to me like your husband will be excited and happy, too!

[Patchfire]

When I got pg with my first, we were being v. careful - not BCP, because I can't take them, but we had barrier methods & spermicide like no one's business! My period was very irregular, and somehow I thought to test even before I thought it would arrive... imagine my shock at those 2 lines!

Well, fast forward 4 years, 8 months & a bit - our little surprise will be five next week! I can't imagine life without her, or if we had waited to ttc when we had planned (two years later). Everything WILL work itself out! :) Your baby wants to be here, and wants to be here now. :)

[Metasequoia]

Me too, conceived Dd2 on the pill. I should have been more suspicious of the breakthrough bleeding. I bled for almost an entire month straight & my midwife just said, "let's finish this cycle & see what happens during the next cycle...." I guess the synthetic hormones weren't strong enough??

Anyhow, I couldn't imagine my life without either of my Dd's - everything happens for a reason.

Hope you & Dh can work it out, good luck & congratulations mama!

[danav]

Congrats, Momma! :)

I know the feeling of shock and disbelief... We have two wonderful children and were so sure our family was complete that DH had a vasectomy in January. He dutifully went in for a sperm check in both February and March, and tested sterile. So we tossed out the birth control and life went on.

At the end of May when I realized my period was several days later than expected, we joked about it ("Heh, wouldn't THAT be funny - wink, wink, ha, ha") but I really thought it was just pre-menopausal stuff starting to happen since I'm in my mid-30's, like my sister was when she started having cycle changes. I decided to take a test (pretty much to cross that possibility off the list before I went to see a gynocologist if my period didn't show up). Imagine my shock when the darn thing turned VERY positive before I could even get the cap back on it!! :yikes:

DH took it better than I did - I was really upset initially, but he was so calm. I still sometimes feel overwhelmed and think "how am I going to DO this?" because I feel like three kids are just going to be more than I wanted to handle, but overall I'm excited and happy about it. And we both believe wholeheartedly that this is absolutely God's will and this baby was just meant to be part of our family.

[flapjack]

Two little miracles here- one conceived using the pill, one using Depo- and yes, I know exactly what you mean about shocked (seven years on from my first pregnancy, it seems like a very distant memory though- there's a huge gap between 21 and 28.) I wouldn't have it any other way, though.
Good luck telling your husband!
(oh, some bits of Europe can be quite baby-friendly. I've taken tinies to parts of France, Switzerland, Greece and Italy over the years, without problems.)

[QueenMommy]

Congratulations!!!

I've gotten pg 3 times on BCP! And I was *very* faithful taking them too. Only one pg wasn't that way. As pp said, it will all work out. That little baby wants to be here!

[Mariposa]

Congratulations!

Things will all work out. We wanted to wait until we had a house, I finished nursing school, etc, but life didn't work out that way. I was so nervous to tell DH, but he just smiled and said "Well, we have been married for 5 years, it is probably time we have a baby!" I was so relieved.

This baby is a bit of a surprise as well. We though we were DTD on safe days, or should I say "I" thought that. Who knew that long cycles changed ovulation dates?? Me, but I wasn't charting.

Let's see, we still don't have a house, I eventually finished nursing school. What we DO have is an amazing 3 year old daughter and now one on the way. Someday, we will own our own house, I am sure of it. We will just have 2 amazing kids by then.

Good luck and welcome to mamahood!

[celestialdreamer]

Congrats! I'm sure everything will work out just fine. I got pregnant with my dd on BCP (taking them faithfully!) and we thought at the time that it was such the 'wrong timing' compared to our plans. I was really excited but so freaked out at first. Slowly we got used to the idea and then we both started imagining the baby and got super excited! It ended up that the timing was completely fine, and I can't imagine my life without her. I truly believe that when a baby is meant to come into the world, no matter what you do it is going to happen! Have a very happy and healthy 9 months!

[Wilhemina]

Congratulations :throb
Just another mom preg. with a surprise baby. I certainly understand your shock!

[Boobiemama]

COngratulations!

Thats why pregnancy is 9 months, to get used to the idea of a baby!
Let us know what your husband says, I cant wait to hear his reaction!

[Birth Junky]

Well, DH was WONDERFUL . . . took the news incredibly well, gave me a hug and a smile and has adjusted much more quickly than I had anticipated. I'm still wavering between anxiety and jubilation, but leaning MUCH more heavily towards the jubilation. (We called a friend of ours who has an almost-2-year-old, and I told him that DH might be calling him for advice on becoming a papa, as he was a little freaked out. Our friend laughed and said "I'm STILL a little freaked out--it just comes with the territory of parenthood!")

After I told DH and the news had sunk in, we headed to a restaurant where we were meeting about 15 friends to celebrate my birthday. After everyone had arrived and ordered dinner, DH stood up to make a toast, and threw in the big news at the end. The table ERUPTED! People laughing, crying, hugging, shouting . . . it was great. Everyone is so happy for us, and some of my girlfriends are already talking about baby shower ideas. :)

Today we met up with his parents to share the news . . . picked up a "Grandparents' Journal" and handed the wrapped book to his mom, who opened the package and said "oh, how nice"--completely clueless. His dad, on the other hand, had a big ol' grin on his face, and nudged me and said " . . . and?" I told them, "And you have until March to get it filled out." Well, that did the trick--his mom started screaming and crying and almost squeezed the life out of me. DH's grandmothers were both thrilled, as was my mom when I called her to tell her. My brother is excited to become an uncle, and all of the friends who found out today were just as happy and excited as the friends we told yesterday.

So I guess that is it--everyone important knows now (or soon will, in the case of my aunts & uncles--I'm sure Mom has been spreading the news all afternoon). Time to settle back and get a little more used to the idea ourselves. I'm sure it will start to hit me a little more once I start FEELING pregnant, but so far--with no morning sickness and only a hint of breast tenderness--it is easy to feel like it is all a dream that I could wake up from at any moment. (*chuckle*)

Thanks for the warm welcome, mamas, and I look forward to hearing your wisdom and advice on this journey.