Addressing the Special Needs of Gifted Children, #6 [Archive]

CAmomto1

08-18-2005, 12:51 PM

I introduced myself on the last thread, but here I am again...

Question - has anyone here had to negotiate with their child's school for advancement in one subject while staying with their age-mates the rest of the day? DD has strengths in math, and is doing at least first grade level math, possibly second grade, depending on whose scope and sequence you look at. She'll be in a K class at a private school this fall, and they use Math Their Way. This curriculum is SO not what DD needs in order to move forward and be challenged. In talking with her future teacher last spring, she assured me that DD would be appropriately challenged, not to worry. (The issue of reading came up as well, as DD can read, too.) Her teacher seemed sincere, but I can't help but wonder if she figured I was just one of 'those' parents who thinks their child is brighter than everyone else's.

Honestly, if I had my way she'd be in a first grade class from the start, but last spring they didn't have any spots, so we accepted the K spot with our fingers crossed that we'd be able to work something out. Now I'm wondering if we've made a big mistake. I love the school in general, from what I've seen and heard about it, and I know that emotionally and socially it's likely a wonderful place for DD to be. But I can't help but also worry about her academic experiences.

Any advice? Do I wait a week, a month, into the year before registering concerns? I'm a worrier by nature ;) and I know this is going to weigh heavily on my mind.

I'd planned on hs'ing, but right now school seems like a better choicce overall for DD. I hope it is - we're giving it a year to see how it goes.

Anyway, I'm rambling. TIA for any help or support.

ChristaN

08-18-2005, 02:04 PM

We are going to be seeking grade advancement for specific subjects with my older dd this year, too. My plan is to inquire at the start of the year (they're just starting now) as to when they do assessments of children's abilities. I am then going to check back after said assessment and inquire as to what they are planning to do with dd in regard to reading instruction. Unless the teacher is a complete bozo, I am sure that she is going to notice that dd is functioning quite above grade level in that area.

She will be in second grade & is a little advanced in math, but not so much that staying in her regular classroom should be a problem. However, for reading, she is currently reading btwn 7th-8th grade books & I want her pulled out to a gifted reading group or sent to an older grade classroom for that subject (5th would be as high of a grade as she could go b/c that is the oldest grade in the school & I would be okay with that or 4th -- whatever the teachers think is appropriate).

I'm going to have to tread lightly here b/c I am sure that I have a reputation as a pain of a parent from last year (she had an awful teacher last year). None the less, I am not there to win friends for me, just to make sure that the environment is appropriate for dds. With our younger dd, she will be 5 at the end of Sept & is entering kg. She, too, can read a bit and has a pretty good understanding of math concepts, but she is young enough that I am fine with her staying in kg and just seeing what her strengths pan out to be over time.

OTMomma

08-18-2005, 02:54 PM

Sooo....what do you guys do when the child completely melts and starts being insane: biting, kicking, hitting, head-butting, calling names. And in front of government workers?

My dd has some of those meltdowns. I've found for us the best solution is to remove her to somewhere she can be quiet (such as taking her out of group) and giving her a snack. For some reason, food really calms my dc down. I've also found that if I give her a snack before she gets all the way wound up, it nips it in the bud, so to speak. However, if she is all the way up to insane, I often have to actually give the food to her doll, and tell it to share with her, then I leave her alone with the doll and the food. She eats and is sane again. Although dd is normally a senstive child, being low blood sugar making her a sight from the exorcist! Good luck with the gifted school- thats awsome!

Peace,
Laura

isisjade

08-18-2005, 02:55 PM

eilonwy

08-18-2005, 05:23 PM

Thank you for starting the new thread, Lisa! :thumb

Christa-- don't worry about being the PITA parent. Do what you have to do.

I'm in total agreement about food for meltdowns. BeanBean gets hysterical when his blood sugar is low! He's having a much better time dealing with everything though, now that he's getting an iron supplement regularly. I can't remember the last time he became irrational and I wasn't able to associate it directly with something that he'd seen/heard (Beauty and the Beast :() or with low blood sugar. I only wish that I'd taken diet and nutrition more seriously as a potential cause for such behavior in the past.

I feel like someone has hit me over the head with a two-by-four again. :( I"m totally exhausted. I guess I'll be having a first trimester ultrasound after all, because I'm so freaking tired that I can well believe that there are two in there. :yawn:

luvmypoonchkie

08-18-2005, 08:12 PM

Sam's trigger food is yellow dye (studies show that as many as 75% of kids have a hyperactive reaction to either red or yellow dye). He seems okay with red, but yellow sends him over the edge, it's almost like he really can't control his actions and regain composure when he's had it. The annoying thing is that it's in EVERYTHING from cereal to vitamins and children's medicines. Blech....

Jenn

CAmomto1

08-18-2005, 08:31 PM

mamaverdi

08-18-2005, 11:34 PM

Sam's trigger food is yellow dye

(Is there a smilie for slapping yourself in the head?)

This reminds me: he had just had a blue lollipop the speech therapist gave him!

ARG...and when I mentioned to the ECI coordinator that he was acting crazy because of the lollipop...she said "Oh he's just acting like a normal 5 year old, and you aren't consistent with him and this is the problem." Um, yeah lady, okay.

But I guess "normal" five year olds are fed Kool-Aid, so go figure.

mv

OTMomma

08-19-2005, 07:26 AM

(Is there a smilie for slapping yourself in the head?)

Sure, Here you go :duh

But I have to say :cuss at that awful woman for acusing you of bad parenting! I don't know why anyone thinks it is OK to do that!

TiredX2

08-19-2005, 09:55 AM

heythere heather

08-19-2005, 08:48 PM

Sooo....what do you guys do when the child completely melts and starts being insane: biting, kicking, hitting, head-butting, calling names. And in front of government workers?

I act like I'm completely in control whenever there's a fit in public. Calm, cool, collected. I talk calmly to Erik, and I don't react to his behaviors, or get upset just because there are people around. I play a mental tape in my head "all the people looking? Wow, they're so impressed with how calmly I'm handling this, and they're amazed at how well I can do it." LOL! It really does help take the pressure off, though.

OTMomma

08-20-2005, 09:31 AM

I'm not usually big on parenting books, but I just read "How to talk so kids will listen and Listen so kids will talk" and I got a lot of insight and ideas for new ways to react to dd. I didn't feel like there was a huge revelation- but I really liked having lists of different ways to react, so now if she does A, I don't just have my usual list of ideas, I have 3 more from the book and I can find one that works.

OTMomma

08-20-2005, 02:04 PM

I do know what you mean about the intensity! It takes a high level of creativity to deal with it!

NoHiddenFees

08-20-2005, 11:27 PM

Dunno how applicable it might be, but I have a friend who recommends Living with the Active Alert Child (http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/0943990882/qid=1124598077) by Linda S. Budd. Friend's DD is gifted... very creative and active, has always needed little sleep, intensely emotional reactions to frustration (much moreso than a typical 3yo). The first chapter is viewable on Amazon.

Charles Baudelaire

08-20-2005, 11:32 PM

Hi! Just subscribin'... :D

m&m

08-21-2005, 01:46 AM

Just wanted to say good luck to all of you who are dealing with the challenges of PS. I hope everything works out in the best way for your dc. :)

It is nice to know that there are some places where the schools try to accommodate the needs of the gifted student.

As for meltdowsn - yep they are common. And understandable since the brain doesn't even have time before the reaction gets out (like a minuscule fuse LOL ) Good meals, lots of rest, and no stress (deep breathing) can all do wonders.

teachma

08-21-2005, 06:21 AM

Subscribing. :p We have been on vacation with my ILs for a week. It was a really trying time for my strong-willed ds, for whom everything with dh and grandpa are a power struggle. Nonetheless, we had some fun times...

Britishmum, we had a similar experience to your daugther's mint toothpaste situation whle on vacation. MIL bought ds a sweatshirt; she bought one for each of us. We accepted our sweatshirts and thanked her appropriately, but when she gave ds his shirt, he said, "I hate this sweatshirt" and threw it back at her. I'm not inclined to be embarrassed by my child's behavior, but don't most almost 5 year olds know how to graciously accept gifts...from their GRANDMA??? I understand the minty toothpaste thing more- my son truly can't stand mint and the way it feels in his mouth, so if your dd is like that, it makes sense. However, my son was being completely arbitrary from what I could see. He hadn't even tried the shirt on, so he couldn't have thought it was uncomfortable...

Bearsmama

08-21-2005, 04:46 PM

Hi Mamas,
I haven't checked in here in months, but I was thrilled to see that there are still so many good discussions and support going on.

Here's a question that may have been answered before: Any good book reccommendations for dealing with a gifted child? Particularly a young one? Or one that includes resources/etc., for as they approach school age?

My oldest son is 3.7 years and incredibly challenging and incredibly bright. He starts preschool (3 hours/day) this September. I just saw an old neighbor today who said, after watching DS play and run around for a while (and really knowing nothing of our challenges in parenting him), "I have a book for you". And then proceeded to ask me about certain behaviors and whether or not he exhibits them. I said yes to all of them. She has a 12 year old gifted daughter who was incredibly similar as a child and is a gifted kid now.

I have to remind myself of his "specialness" and coming to this thread really, really helps. For some reason, I hate to label, but as the months and years go on, I know that I am dealing with a very gifted boy. BTW, he was talking to the neighbor about plate tectonics. I think that's what tipped her off. :D

Thanks again for this thread. And if anyone knows a good book, could you please post it? TIA :)

eilonwy

08-21-2005, 06:41 PM

As a child, I honestly didn't know how to accept a gift graciously or well. I tend to be very direct, honest to the point of bluntness, and I've always been this way. As a child (really until I was an older teen, but I've always been socially inept) I could not really wrap my head around the difference between an acceptable and an unacceptable lie. I always thought that the truth was preferable, even if it hurt people. In part, I know that this had something to do with my own personal ability to percieve the truth more readily than my peers, and with my own desire for knowledge and understanding. The way I saw it, lies only really counted as lies if the person listening to them didn't know that they weren't hearing the truth. I was very concerned with truth and justice and fairness, much moreso than with politness.

I guess what I'm saying is, I can relate both to your embarassment as parents and to your childrens' tendancies to express themselves honestly and directly, with little apparent concern for the feelings of those they may offend. I was exactly the same way. I suppose it's lucky that I was rarely given gifts of any kind. :blush

Interestingly, this problem hasn't come up with BeanBean. He's still very young, but he seems to be far more concerned with the way that people feel than he is with the reality of any given situation. His social skills are better developed now than mine were at 14 (honestly; I'm not trying to exagerate about either of us :blush) and he really seems to empathize with others. He hurts when others are hurt, he wants to make it better. If he were to recieve a gift which he did not enjoy, he might (at this age) make the faux pas of letting his displeasure be known, but he would immediately be aware of the reaction of the person who gave the gift and would probably apologize, if not offer hugs and kisses. He doesn't like to offend people, it hurts him as though he himself was the injured party. I'm not sure where he learned this, I think that it must be part of his own innate personality because he certainly didn't inherit it from me. :blush

I don't think that it's teaching, I really think that it has a lot more to do with a child's inborn personality and their own priorities. For me, it was very important to tell the truth at all costs. I've learned better, and when I'm out and about in public (or even on the net) I make an effort not to hurt people. I'm not great at it, but I try. I have managed to outgrow my tendancy to be blunt, or at least I've learned that bluntness does not always serve as well as a less direct approach might. I think that your kids will get there, too. In the meantime, why don't you try roleplaying? Perhaps actually stepping into the shoes of the people they offended might help them develop better tools for dealing with unwanted gifts.

teachma

08-21-2005, 07:45 PM

For me, it was very important to tell the truth at all costs.

YES, this is my ds exactly! He is honest to a fault. For example, he has always told me everything he did "wrong" each day at school, like he needs to confess and get it off his chest or something, or like he would be committing a lie by omission (he also has tremendous gulit, but that could be from being half Catholic and half Jewish- laughing smilie won't work!) He tells me when he thinks people are ugly, and apparently it really bothers him (like the swim teacher at camp, for whom he REFUSED to perform because he couldn't stand to look at her face!) He won't play with a girl at school because he doesn't like the sound of her voice (it is annoying...). He is very attuned to how HE feels, and he can explain it to me easily. But it makes me feel he's kind of shallow sometimes, to hear how he's judging people on external qualities...

Also, this is a big one, he always cries about lying after having accidentally told someone something wrong. For example, this weekend, he came in crying from the backyard and said, "Mom, I lied to someone." When I asked what the lie was, it took forever to extract, and it turned out to be something that happened at school- which ended more than 8 weeks ago! He had accidentally told his teacher that his grandfather was Japanese, when in actuality, he's Chinese. I guess that spending time with Gung-gung brought that memory into his mind, and he felt so upset that he'd "lied." This type of thing had happened before- in his mind, if he says something that isn't true, he lied, and he's going to feel very upset. Now, why he didn't feel at all upset about hitting his 1.5 year old ds in the face with a belt buckle today is just beyond me!

mamaverdi

08-21-2005, 09:57 PM

I think we tend to forget that a gift entails a debt. If you receive a gift, you are indebted to the person who gives the gift. I remember reading great Norwegian stories about this very topic. Who wants to be indebted to someone for something they detest?

Well, we had ds#1 tested for this school---which was supposed to be great. Hmph. Turns out they (no surprise) exaggerated their own greatness, as well as the generosity of their scholarship program. :(

He easily qualified for the school which was no surprise really. They seemed quite surprised that for a 5 year old he knew what "indigent" meant. When I gave the guy a look like, of course he knows that, he gave me the definitiion "hobo" I guess thinking that I didn't know the word, not that I didn't know why they were confused. The test-giver said that she was sure he could have done the "high school" words had he not gotten tired and hungry.

It was also no surprise to me, but a surprise to them that he can't add and subtract or read yet. I guess they are used to seeing otherwise. THEN the kicker happened: "Evidently the preschool he has hasn't been academic. And I don't want to scare you, but there are things they can only learn beteween 4 and 7 years of cage, and after that the mind SNAPS shut." Ummmmm HUH? :angry

There was also some nonsense about whole language which I didn't like: "we use phonics to sound out words"; canned cirriculum; and oh yeah "obviously everything he knows is from 'home enrichment'"---Uh doesn't most if not all of our learning come from relevant applications no matter where they occur? :irked:

So we're sending him to the Sudbury school which has just moved into town. :thumb I'll leave coercive and fear-based education for others. :p

mv

isisjade

08-22-2005, 07:39 AM

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loraxc

08-22-2005, 11:20 AM

mamaverdi, what a bummer! I swear, everyone has a different idea about when kids are "supposed" to learn things. Heaven forbid anyone goes outside the box in either direction.

I have a question that's only somewhat gifted-related, but maybe more so than I realize. My husband's father is very ill, and will probably pass away in the next month or two. DD (19 months) saw him quite recently, and though he could barely interact with her (at the time he was still at home, though; now he's in the hospital) she took to him. Since our visit, she has been talking about him a lot. Actually, without sounding like a huge flake, I kind of think she "knows" he's not doing well. We rarely talk about his health issues around her, and when we do, we certainly don't call him "Grandpa"; yet she's been bringing him up constantly, saying "Hug Grandpa" and "Want to see Grandpa" out of nowhere and spontaneously mentioning him as someone she loves. She has only seen him three times in ther whole life, once she was a tiny baby, once at 9 months, and then last month, so it's not as though they have a long-term close relationship, but she is quite aware of who he is and that he is DH's "dada."

I have no idea when and how to approach the idea that Grandpa is ill and will soon be leaving us. Should we wait till he passes away? I am also not sure what to say when we go up for the eventual funeral. Given her memory and understanding, I am 100% certain that if we go up to their house again but Grandpa is absent, she will ask for him and ask where he is, repeatedly. (I see this being very upsetting for Nana and others, too.) What should we tell her? How do we explain death without scaring her or confusing her? I know some gifted kids get very anxious about death when they learn about it. Again, her level of comprehension and understanding is very high, but we haven't talked at all about how bodies work or what sickness is or death.

allgirls

08-23-2005, 08:55 AM

Hi everyone! Thanks for the fascinating read!

I have a question....this has never happened with my other two children but seems to be with Sophia

Fears...she is extremely fearful and anxious. Day before yesterday there was a whistling sound in the pipes when she flushed...she decided it was a whale and became extremely afraid.(We watched Finding Nemo a few weeks back and she loved it and has been "talking whale" ever since) It was a rough night and although she finally got to sleep for the first time since she moved into her own bed she woke up with bad dreams about a "whale in the house" and came into my bed..no problem, she's really cuddly, then talked(obsessed?)about it all day. She was particularly afraid in the bathroom although she would go if I was right there.

I finally think she understands now that whales live in the ocean and we are far away from the ocean and have warned her siblings not to mention that her grandparents all live within a few metres of the ocean or we may never be able to go!

I had to get a map out..show her where we live, and where whales live and the obsession seems to have faded somewhat(it was an obsession..she was upset and jumpy all day)

This is just an example...every few days she finds a new fear and becomes extremely focussed on it until somehow we manage to explain it away.

She is still absolutely petrified of the vacuum cleaner(of course I am not fond of it myself and may be projecting :LOL )

Any experience with anything like this?

On the plus side, I am so glad she is verbal...I can't imagine how she would be if she had the same fears and I had no idea what the problem was!

BoyGirlTwinsAPMama

08-23-2005, 11:10 AM

My husband's father is very ill, and will probably pass away in the next month or two. DD (19 months) saw him quite recently, and though he could barely interact with her (at the time he was still at home, though; now he's in the hospital) she took to him. Since our visit, she has been talking about him a lot. Actually, without sounding like a huge flake, I kind of think she "knows" he's not doing well. We rarely talk about his health issues around her, and when we do, we certainly don't call him "Grandpa"; yet she's been bringing him up constantly, saying "Hug Grandpa" and "Want to see Grandpa" out of nowhere and spontaneously mentioning him as someone she loves. She has only seen him three times in ther whole life, once she was a tiny baby, once at 9 months, and then last month, so it's not as though they have a long-term close relationship, but she is quite aware of who he is and that he is DH's "dada."

I have no idea when and how to approach the idea that Grandpa is ill and will soon be leaving us. Should we wait till he passes away? I am also not sure what to say when we go up for the eventual funeral. Given her memory and understanding, I am 100% certain that if we go up to their house again but Grandpa is absent, she will ask for him and ask where he is, repeatedly. (I see this being very upsetting for Nana and others, too.) What should we tell her? How do we explain death without scaring her or confusing her? I know some gifted kids get very anxious about death when they learn about it. Again, her level of comprehension and understanding is very high, but we haven't talked at all about how bodies work or what sickness is or death.
I personally have a LOT of experience with loved ones dying and was a gifted child myself. My father died when I was 6 (not as young as your dd, but it was my daddy, afterall). It was very important for me to be able to say goodbye and attend the funeral and I was for years and years angry and saddened that I was not allowed to attend the burial b/c I was *too young* to deal with it. I personally feel that if your dd has a connection with her grandpa, is there any way you could spend more time with him before he passes? Take pictures of him holding her or reading to her or her just sitting there next to him? These times and pictures will be cherished by her forever. I always was sad that I had no grandpa (both died before I was born). Even though she is young, her mind is not dull and apparently she feels the connection strongly by asking for him and if at all possible could her feelings be honored?
On the note about upsetting grandma if your dd asks for grandpa, I personally feel it is extremely important not to downplay a loss, especially one so huge in your family even if it invokes strong emotions that would cause crying. It may have grandma crying, but it would be such a wonderful experience for your MIL to get to grieve with her granddaughter over a man that they both love so much. I know that when my brother and sister died, it was a ray of sunlight to have one of their friends call me crying, b/c then I knew that they were as important to someone else in this world and it truly comforted me during the many bleak hours after their deaths. The strongest comfort I had during the days after my sister died of cancer, a bunch of friends called my from Texas, all bright and happy and with the purpose of cheering me up. In midsentence they all broke down crying and were super embarrassed and said "well how's that for trying to cheer you up". And really, it was the MOST comforting thing they could have done for me! To know they cared so much and that I wasn't the only one crying alone, it truly helped the healing.
I send my deepest sympathy to you and your family on this time of illness. Sickness affects the entire family unit in so many ways. After your FIL passes away, if he has a burial, it might be nice to allow your dd to take a flower to his grave once in awhile so she can at least have some peace in knowing where he is resting. All IMHO. :hug

loraxc

08-23-2005, 11:50 AM

I personally feel it is extremely important not to downplay a loss, especially one so huge in your family even if it invokes strong emotions that would cause crying. It may have grandma crying, but it would be such a wonderful experience for your MIL to get to grieve with her granddaughter over a man that they both love so much.

This is a powerful point. I would feel a little better about it if I knew that DD were going to understand the finality of Grandpa being gone. Like, if she asks for him once, okay...if she continues to ask for him and we continue having to explain, that might be rough for everyone. I am also just trying to think about language that will not be euphemistic or scary that she can understand.

"Grandpa had lived a long time, and his body stopped working. We can't see him anymore, but he will always love you." ??? Something like that? I have no idea how to introduce the concept of "his body is still here, but his spirit is gone." (Not spirit in a religious sense--his essence, if you will.)

We don't believe in God or heaven, so I don't plan to introduce any of that, although it is possible someone else will say something like that..."gone to be with Jesus" or the like. Oh dear. She doesn't even know who Jesus is, except that it's a word mommy says sometimes when annoyed. :bag:

I'm wary of introducing the idea that he was sick and he died, in case she starts to worry that every time someone gets sick, they might go away forever.

I have found some books on the subject that look pretty good. That's always a good way to get through to DD, so that may help. She's just so young, though. It's hard.

SilverWillow

08-23-2005, 12:13 PM

isisjade

08-23-2005, 03:35 PM

isisjade

08-23-2005, 04:11 PM

[

eilonwy

08-23-2005, 04:41 PM

When my niece was not quite three, my grandmother died. She freaked out, she just couldn't wrap her head around the idea that grandma was not coming home. If she went back to Florida, why had she left all her clothing? :crying It was really difficult to deal with. A few months after my grandmother's death, one of ChibiChibi's father's cousins was brutally murdered and he had to go to the funeral (to hear Chibi and her cousins talking about this was enough to make your hair stand on end!); Less than a year later, my mother was in the hospital having open heart surgery. ChibiChibi couldn't visit her in ICU, and she had developed a fear of hospitals because grandma had gone into the hospital and not come back. I was worried about my mother dying because I knew that I'd have to be the one to explain it to ChibiChibi. I asked for the chaplain, and the guy who came told me that he tells children about death in terms of nature-- the leaves fall from the trees because they're old or tired or they don't work right anymore, and the tree is naked for a little while but because the old leaf left there's room for a new one to grow. I still like that explanation.

As to school, I just wanted to comment on this: Won't she act up out of boredom? She certainly does at home. I guess my hope is that the novelty of the situation will carry her through.

It would have to be quite novel to carry her through an entire year! I admire your optimism, but I'd be prepared to pull her out if things get too dull for her. I'm a total cynic when it comes to schools, though. :LOL

luvmypoonchkie

08-23-2005, 05:55 PM

Here's a nice book for children about death that uses the nature analogy Eilonwy was discussing. Your in my thoughts:hug!

http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/1591470722/103-5438858-0998253?v=glance

Jenn

teachma

08-23-2005, 07:53 PM

Fears...she is extremely fearful and anxious. Day before yesterday there was a whistling sound in the pipes when she flushed...she decided it was a whale and became extremely afraid.(We watched Finding Nemo a few weeks back and she loved it and has been "talking whale" ever since) It was a rough night and although she finally got to sleep for the first time since she moved into her own bed she woke up with bad dreams about a "whale in the house" and came into my bed..no problem, she's really cuddly, then talked(obsessed?)about it all day. She was particularly afraid in the bathroom although she would go if I was right there.

This is just an example...every few days she finds a new fear and becomes extremely focussed on it until somehow we manage to explain it away.

Any experience with anything like this?

YES! I have posted, at length sometimes, about my son's fears, obsessions and anxiety. He is older than your dd (just turned 5) but STILL has very similar experiences such as the one you described about the whale. He is mostly terrified of death (who isn't?) and had a major cemetary obsession for a while...we've been through a lot, and if you ever want to hear more about it, I'd be glad to share. I have to go do some work now, though, so I'll write more later!

LeftField

08-25-2005, 06:55 AM

Subscribing, because we'll be home in a few days and therefore have access to email again.

Are we still sharing art? I can share some of my ds1's stuff when we get back. Did Luvmypoochie share Sam's stuff? Does anyone else want to share art? I think I might have missed some things on the end of the giant thread.

eilonwy

08-29-2005, 12:02 PM

:wave We're very busy these days! I just thought I'd stop in and say hi. :LOL

teachma

08-29-2005, 04:23 PM

Yeah, we're really busy here, too. I went back to work last Tuesday, after 9 weeks off for summer vacation. So, my family is "back to reality," which entails having my mom watch the kids from 8:30-4:30 Monday through Friday. Ds starts kindergarten after Labor Day! I have heard good things about his teacher from a friend of mine who teaches at the school. My students come back this Wednesday- and for the first time, they're FOURTH graders! I have been teaching second graders for nine years, and this is a very welcomed change. Additionally, I will be teaching one gifted third grader reading this year; our school hasn't ever, to my knowledge, accelerated a student in one subject before, and I'm honored to be the teacher to get to try it out! I met with the educational psych. regarding evaluating ds, and she said she didn't see it as imperative at this time, though "it might be fun" for him, and for us to get the results. I think $2000 is a lot of money to spend for this if it isn't necessary; I am inclined to wait and see how he does in K with respect to boredom and behavior. Though test scores could be good ammunition, if I need it, to justify his behavior...so maybe I should go ahead with it. I don't know.

ChristaN

08-29-2005, 05:16 PM

We've got Back to School night tonight for my older dd; kindergarteners are apparently in a week or two. I am hoping to speak with the teacher about assessments and acceleration for dd in reading. I am hoping that our school will be as accommodating at yours is, teachma.

BTW, do you know at what grade level the third grader that they put in your fourth grade class is reading? I don't know how advanced dd needs to be in order to expect some kind of acceleration.

Younger dd's class starts doing reading/letter/phonemic awareness assessments next week. I don't think that they are assessing their number recognition/math for a while. I'll be curious to see how she does, too.

LeftField

08-29-2005, 06:09 PM

Ok, as promised, here is some of my son's artwork. You'll be sorry you asked, though, because I could get carried away with it. :p He used to draw stacks of things a day, although lately, in our vacation aftermath, he hasn't really been drawing. It worries me slightly, because drawing was how he seemed to process things and I want to make sure he still has a suitable outlet for that. Anyway, I keep all his stuff on a family website, but I've selected some of my favorites for photobucket. I've shared some of these on another site that I love, so if they look familiar to you, that's why.

I think photobucket did the pictures backwards in the slideshow and I can't figure out how to reorder them. Here is the slideshow:
http://photobucket.com/albums/y6/hrk72/
The password is advpre.

and here are some explanations, in reverse order (i.e. how I intended it).

3.5 yrs old:
-Brio car and driver. This is a representational drawing he made of this toy, while examining it. He did add a catepillar track to the wheels, however, because he likes those.
-Crane pulling car out of sticky mud near the crane's home. The crane's home is on the line in the upper right hand corner and it's small because it's further away.

3.75 yrs old:
-House with neighbor's house partially visible. This is a view of our house facing the open garage (with vehicles inside, seen from behind). The squares underneath are the foundation. Our neighbor's house is partially visible on the upper right; it sort of sticks out from an angle.

-Walking clown. I just always liked this one.

Almost 4yrs old:
- Ceiling fan disassembled. He went through a phase of drawing things as though they were taken apart, with ceiling fans being one of his favorite. Everything on that drawing is an actual part of the fan in the correct qty, with the exception of the dots which I doubt he counted. The U's with the line down the middle are the blades. The two large circles are the circular unit that is mounted in the ceiling and the unit that the blades are suspended from. The four circles on the middle left are the lightbulbs. The tiny circle and line on the middle right are the string and the bead on the end of the string. etc. etc.

- Ben disassembled. He drew himself as though he were taken apart. I remember that the two lines on the top are his two forearms. There are huge gloves on the bottom. Some of the squares are the legs of his shorts, sleeves, etc.

4yrs old: These are recent pictures, drawn in the month or two after his fourth birthday.
-Table scene with reflection. This is a picture of Blue and Steve from Blue's Clue's skadooing onto our kitchen table. In the metal bowl on the bottom left of the picture, he drew the reflection of himself drawing, he said. You can see his face and a large crayon on the bowl.

-Planes. He insisted on getting one of those step by step "learn how to draw" books from the adult section of the library, even though I secretly think their step by step thing is uninspiring. He had a hard time following the steps, however, because he doesn't draw things by connecting shapes; he draws whole units, if that makes any sense. After I assured him that he could just draw the final sketch as he saw it, he did so. The plane on top is a Japanese Zero plane from WWII and the bottom one is a Lockheed Constellation. He is all about mechanical things, as you can see. LOL.

-Balloons coming out of open trunk of car. I just liked this one, because the idea of a whole trunkful of balloons seemed so cool and optimistic.

Uh oh. My little one is crying for some reason. Let me run for now.

luvmypoonchkie

08-29-2005, 07:26 PM

Thanks for posting the pictures! They're really awesome! You have one talented little boy on your hands. Sam hasn't been drawing much for the last month or so, but he did make this for me last week. It's a boat in the water on a rainy/sunny day with a dolphin jumping out of the water (he's almost 3.5).

http://i22.photobucket.com/albums/b302/samsmommy76/DSCN3218.jpg

I know a couple of other posters mentioned their dc's artistic abilities, please feel free to share!

Jenn

teachma

08-29-2005, 07:57 PM

BTW, do you know at what grade level the third grader that they put in your fourth grade class is reading?

I will find out tomorrow, when I have a meeting with the girl's third grade teacher and our principal. I know that this decision was based on a combination of her parents' persistence and the fact that she had the highest OLSAT score in the second grade last year. I don't know her scores, but the highest I had in my class (I used to teach second) was 137, so hers is more. I am really excited my school is trying this out, and I am determined to make it a positive experience for all involved because I know there's a real need to tailor instruction for those who are gifted...and I hope my son has access to similar practices in the school he'll be attending. (We live in a much "better" district than the one in which I teach, but well see if it's good for him.)

lckrause

08-29-2005, 08:39 PM

Leftfield, those drawings are terrific! I am really impressed. The clown and the "taken apart" picture are particularly cool. I hope your son continues to draw. :)

Jenn, you know I am a big fan of Sam's stuff. :D His work looks so alive. It seems to jump right off the page. Love the dolphin!

Some of Nan's old art is here: http://www.ghosts.org/annika/2002/arty.html I have to update with some more of her newer stuff.

Speaking of Nan, she tried gymnastics at a new place today (we had a bad experience at the Y earlier this summer) and it went really well. She took to it like a fish to water and had a great time. What a difference pleasant teachers and real gym equipment make. Shameless mom brag time: after only half a class (1/2 hour) she's already 2nd best in her class. Despite--or maybe because of--being a head shorter than even the 6 year olds. :LOL

I spent most of the weekend cobbling together a chemistry "course" for Hollis. I found a couple awesome websites with lots of free worksheets and labs and suggested curricula and stuff. We have the Usborne Dictionary of Chemistry, a Smithsonian chemistry set, and one of the moms here on MDC is sending us her old college chem texts. :thumb So Hollis is a happy camper right now seeing all this come together.

Britishmum, 9 months and only saying two words? You better get that kid into speech therapy ASAP! :LOL Still, a baby beats a golden lab any day. ;)

Lisa

eilonwy

08-29-2005, 09:27 PM

I'm having computer problems again. :eyesroll Right now, I'm on the ILs old computer, which moves like molasses in January because they had a high speed connection with absolutely no virus protection for about five years. :eyesroll I talked them into buying some for the new computer, but nothing will rescue this one except for a complete wipe of the hard drive, which I can't do because I can't find a Windows 98 disc to reinstall it. :nut

Anyway, my point is, I can't look at the pictures because the page is taking a year and a half to load. :( I also can't scan in any BeanBean art because my printer isn't installed on this computer. I've been really despondent about my Macintosh lately. :crying Why did I have to ruin it before I even got to enjoy it?! :bawl

BeanBean told me this morning that there is no milk in my nursies, and this evening instead of asking to nurse he asked for a bottle of Pediasure. :crying :o I've got mixed feelings on it. When I told Mike, he said that it made perfect sense to him, because for the past few days BooBah has been trying to nurse on him whenever he's not wearing a shirt. He knew that my supply was diminishing as soon as she tried (she never had before). Poor BooBah! She won't give up nursing, though she does ask for something to drink afterwards. I was hoping that tandem nursing would keep my supply up longer, but something has gone awry and the milk is already gone (I'm 6w 4d today). Interestingly enough, I also feel like my morning sickness is going. :scratch That's a real puzzler, eh? One pregnancy symptom leaving and a new one taking it's place, all about 10 weeks ahead of schedule for me. :scratch

BeanBean is really enjoying reading, and is looking forward to September because he'll be able to wear his new shoes. When I bought them, I told him that they were "for the fall, when it starts to get cold." He asked me when that was, and I told him it was September, which led to getting the calendar down and showing him July, August, and September. He realized this morning that "it's almost September, and I'll get to wear my new Nikes!" :LOL He expects me to take the box down on the first, and since I did say that "fall" was "September"... well, that's that! :LOL

Today BeanBean put me on time out "for singing about BooBahs and BeanBeans." I pouted and he gave me a hug and said, "I love you, but you're on time out and you can't click that mouse." Later he came and took my face in his hands and said, "Your time is up. I love you very much, but don't sing that song again!" I don't like the idea of time out very much, but BeanBean is seriously attached to it. He really does need the time to get control of himself and relax, and I think that he enjoys the extra loveloves that go with it, but it still rubs me entirely the wrong way.

BooBah has been a most excellent and amazing BooBah! She's excellently cuddly and loveable, has been talking a blue streak and will climb anything that holds still long enough for her to get a grip. In fact, if there's nothing to climb, she will make something to climb out of available materials (she prefers laundry hampers and books, but anything will do!) and proceed to climb it with alarming speed. These days I'm glad that she's not in a crib, because she would have broken her neck climbing out of it by now. :shake She's also beginning to demonstrate an almost scary degree of receptive language. Last week, for example, I was giving BeanBean some of his daily loveloves. He was on the bed getting hugs and kisses while I asked, "Who loves you?" He would answer with a person, "Daddy loves me!" and I'd ask again, with more kisses and tickles. In the middle of this, BooBah ran up and kissed him on the cheek! :love She was all drooly and happy and said, "I love Eli!" :love It was such a melty moment! :LOL What a sugar bun! Anyway, she's been doing little things like that which demonstrate understanding. She's also taken to dancing in the middle of the living room for no apparent reason and to no audible music. She spins in a circle, claps her hands, laughs and wiggles... It's so cute! I love her little stomp-steps, she's got a rhythm all her own. :love

BeanBean has also been extra sweet and lovey lately, and very helpful with BooBah. He knows that we're going to have a baby, and when I told him that my milk will come back when the baby comes out he said, "Well, let's go to the doctor and get that baby out!!" :LOL I told him that it has to grow more before it can come out and he was so disappointed. :o :innocent He will discuss airplanes and helicopters with anyone who will sit still long enough for him to talk to them, and at my LLL meeting last week he insisted on going to the bathroom by himself. He went to the door and announced, "I have to pee. You're not going to help me!" and then he *ran* to the bathroom. :eyesroll I followed him, but he did all of the important things by himself. It seems to me that he's more willing to use the bathroom while he's wearing clothing if he's not at home. :shrug I dunno. Today he was naked, so he used the bathroom all day. I've got to get him to do the same thing wearing underpants. :scratch

Tomorrow evening, Mike and I are taking the kids to an orchard. We won't be doing an apple pick (though it does sound like fun!) but we'll get lots of different kinds of apples and I'll make a vat of applesauce later in the week. My MIL asked me to make apple butter again, but when I made it last year it was a complete accident and I have no idea how it happened. :shrug It was absolutely delicious, and it made the yummiest half-moon pies, but I'm not sure that I could replicate the experiment. I've still got a few jars of last year's applesauce, one of which we opened and inhaled last week (:yum). We'll have to eat them or find something else to do with them. :shrug This year I'm going to be peeling my apples; I don't usually, but BooBah has no molars and the peels are really difficult for her. I'd like for her to be able to eat her fill without worrying about her choking on the peels, so they're out this year. In fact, those peels and cores may be my incentive to start a compost pile... Hmmm...:idea

Lisa-- I'm so jealous!! I love chemistry! :LOL I hope BeanBean develops an interest in chemistry when he's a bit older. :thumb

veiledexpressions

08-31-2005, 12:42 PM

May I break into this thread?

I have a gifted 3.5 year old, as well as a special needs (severe delays) 2 year old. They are complete polar opposites. I have been lurking in the gifted threads, but haven't posted until now.

My son was an early talker (sentences by 12 months), and was very articulate , with a vocabulary of over 1,000 words (I lost count) by 18 months, he was also able to recognize all of his letters, numbers (through 10), count in English and Spanish, recognize shapes, and colors (English and Spanish), and was potty trained at that point. He figured out the pattern to count to 100 around his 2nd birthday, and did well with counting objects (beyond rote counting), and could recognize some written words at that point.

He's now interested in sounding words out, drawing, doing puzzles, painting, telling elaborate stories, having in depth discussions with imaginary friends, and taking things apart (much to the chagrin of mommy). He is literally a little sponge. I have picked up some wonderful educational ideas from these threads.

Sometimes I feel like he is neglected (mental stimulation), because we focus quite a bit on his sister, who is in therapy 4 days a week. Now, he also has to contend with his new baby brother. Zach (my three year old), is also a very high needs child. So, it's quite difficult to keep up with him.

Question, do any of your little ones have issues with constant nightmares?

isisjade

08-31-2005, 03:13 PM

teachma

08-31-2005, 08:05 PM

Dd#1, who has far more social development challenges than #2, did so well I'm stunned. What wonderful teachers we have! One in particular just seems to 'get it'. She took dd under her wing, gave her jobs to do looking after the animals, chatted to her about our pets, and generally just gave dd chance to weigh her up and decide she trusted her. Dd was even talking to her, very quietly and with her back to her - but talking - by the end of the morning. :D :D :D (this is a huge deal - she does not talk to new people, and can take years to warm up to someone. She sometimes never does warm up, and simply cringes if certain people even look at her). She didnt cope with circle time but nobody acted like they noticed or cared. :)

I am so happy for you and dd that it went well. I know just what it can be like, since our kiddos are so similar. I'm dreading tomorrow, because ds gets to meet his new kindergarten teacher and classmates for the first time. School begins on Tuesday, and tomorrow is the "meet and greet," which is luckily just 30 minutes. My mom will be bringing him, as I'll be with my own students who had their 1st day today!

Amazingly, no nightmares here, though we have serious daily waking fears all the time!

LeftField

08-31-2005, 09:00 PM

Thank you for looking at ds1's artwork.

Jenn, I love that boat and dolphin picture. I love the detail in it. I know this sounds weird, but the water kind of looks like it's moving. It's a great picture!

Lisa, I love the use of color in Nan's paintings. I think that, "Chocolate flypaper" has to be my favorite. What a cool idea!

Welcome, Jen. I don't have exp with nightmares, but I hope that you get some good support and advice. {{hugs}}

Britishmum, I'm glad that school is going well for your daughter.

Teachma, Good luck at the meet and greet tomorrow!

Rynna, I hope you are able to sort out your computer problems. Your kids sound so sweet and cuddly, btw; I love the way you describe them.

Leftfield, those drawings are terrific! I am really impressed. The clown and the "taken apart" picture are particularly cool. I hope your son continues to draw. :)

Thank you. :) He still hasn't drawn yet, but we haven't been back home a week yet, so maybe he's still dealing with jet-lag and general readjustment. It's just unlike him to go more than a day without drawing.

Like Rynna, I am also jealous of your chemistry set-up. I hope that it's something that appeals to the kids one day. It sounds like so much fun.

Total random stuff about us...
My kids act so differently around other people. We were with my ILs for over two weeks and while the kids were both obsessed with my dh's childhood "tiny Legos" , they otherwise appeared so ordinary. It's good, I suppose. But you'd never know that anything was different about ds1. He's so good at blending or maybe it's hiding. My MIL was incredibly impressed that he was able to count 5 dots on something that she asked him about. :shrug She said, "You can tell that he actually understands there are five and he's not just reciting." :W Five?? Sometimes, I wonder if people think I'm making stuff up or at least exaggerating, maybe prepping??

Ds2 has been naming some planets, but never the right ones. He hardly has any choice, since our house is inundated with space stuff and ds1 has been "reading" space books to him for a while. Today, after listening to me read the Magic School Bus space book to ds1, ds2 brought me a picture book of planets from the shelf. He was saying, "Joopter? joopter?". He says, "moon", Mars" and "Saturn" (sa-sur), but never for the right planets. Sometimes, he really insists that Saturn is Mars. Poor kid has little choice in seeing planet stuff. :LOL

We're still dealing with jet-lag, as mentioned. Everyone's kind of grouchy around here.

lckrause

08-31-2005, 09:45 PM

Leftfield, that story about the planets is funny. :LOL Hollis used to always try to teach Nan her letters when she was a baby. Probably why she learned them soooo long before she learned how to read. There's a pic here: http://www.ghosts.org/annika/ahletter.jpg I bet your son is just readjusting to the time difference and stuff and will draw again soon. :)

Teachma, I hope your son has a great time at kindergarten!

Rynna, I hope your computer troubles get resolved soon. Is it selfish to say it's beacause I miss you on the thread? Boobah sounds just adorable! I am sure she and Beanbean will forgive you for the milk trauma. :) Gosh, 6 weeks is really early to lose your milk, though.

Britishmum, I'm so glad to hear that the preschool went well. I was wondering what would happen with that. I don't watch any soap operas so this thread is the closest I've got. Next installment: Teachma's son's kinder capers! :LOL

Jen, welcome to the thread. You sound like a great mom. :) My kids don't have a lot of nightmares but neither did I as a kid. I guess it runs in the family.

Isisjade, I don't remember Hollis going through a "why" phase, although Nan definitely did. :shrug I'd say a "how" stage has been going on since birth though. :wink

We got our chemistry books in the mail the other day. They are college-level and much more comprehensive than the middle/high school level book (not a textbook) we already have. :thumb Hollis was pawing through it last night looking at stuff. It's scary to realize that he can actually read understand a college textbook. BTW, Rynna and Leftfield, I think you guys are nuts getting that excited about chemistry. :LOL Do you want me to assign you some mole problems just for fun?

eilonwy

09-01-2005, 07:45 AM

BeanBean had nightmares when he was tiny, and all that Mike and I could think of was that he was having nightmares about the NICU, because nothing else that was remotely scary had happened to him. Every other nightmare has been directly related to a scary idea, usually from a movie or his cousins. He had three nights of bad dreams after he saw Beauty and the Beast. :guilty BooBah "wakes" in the middle of the night and screams for no reason. I'm pretty sure that she's got night terrors, but at her age noone would diagnose the problem that way. Mike's sister had horrible night terrors as a child, though, and and she was exactly the same way as an infant. It's kind of funny, because when she's awake she's a very mellow little person (totally unlike Mike's sister, who, in the present age, would never have gotten out of elementary school without a ritalin prescription), but when she's asleep, all hell can break loose. She's been sleeping for longer stretches, but whenever she has an exciting day or something unfamiliar happens, she "wakes" all night long, screaming bloody murder and pulling my hair and shaking me around with her eyes shut. It sucks. :(

Isis-- BeanBean is the same age as your son, and while he does ask "why?" he answers himself as often as not. :shrug "Why is BooBah crying? She's unhappy because she wants a nursie." He has entire conversations with himself. :LOL He also asks rhetorical "why" questions-- "Why did you go out? Don't ever leave me, and you must never leave BooBah!"-- to which he expects no answer. Most of his questions are "What does this say? Mommy, read this to me!" and "Do you see that? It's a____!" :LOL

Britishmum-- So glad to hear that preschool went well! BeanBean actually told someone that he was homeschooling last week. :love I was so proud! :D

Leftfield-- That's so cool about the planets! BeanBean did the same thing, only he knew them all fairly early. He's totally obsessed. BooBah knows Saturn (it's very distinctive) but she gets confused when you start talking about Saturn cars. :LOL The rest of them, she tries to say their names but she can't match the names to the pictures. I may make BeanBean a styrofoam solar system in the near future, if I can find a way to make it impervious to BooBah's teeth. :eyesroll

Lisa-- Chemistry rocks, it's one of my "things." :LOL Nobody else in my family is remotely interested in chemistry; my older brother's father is a chemist so he used to feign interest, but after failing a whole semester of chemistry in college he decided to be honest with himself and his father and changed his major to journalism. :LOL I just can't get enough chemistry, I'm so excited about teaching BeanBean and BooBah and the new Bug! :D I'm content to wait, though. It's plenty of fun watching BeanBean learn how to read! :D He's so excited by it all. :LOL It's all good-- no molarity problems just now, thank you. :wink I did get to explain the concept of molarity to Mike a few months ago, though, and that was really nice. :D :LOL

I taught my brother his letters. :p I actually taught him how to read before he was five. :LOL I still remember my mother finding out that he could read and asking me about it. "Did you know that your brother can read?" "Of course he can, I taught him." "You did?" "Yeah. Why do you ask?" "Um, no reason...." :tiptoe Later she told me that she had read that it's almost impossible for a child to teach another child how to read, it's supposedly the hardest way to do it and the child learning usually gives up before he gets anywhere. :shrug Nobody bothered to tell us, so we didn't care. :LOL

My niece with Asperger's started school this week. She went to the kindergarten orientation and met her new teacher, who was absolutely stunned by her. "Um, she can read," he said. "Yes," said my mother, "But she really doesn't understand most of it. You do realize that, right? She hasn't got a clue about what she's reading, it's hyperlexia." "Yes, but she can read." He just didn't know what to make of her. My sister held up a dinosaur for her and asked her what it was and she said, "That's a tyrannosaurus rex, and this is a triceratops." Mom said that the teacher's head was literally spinning. :LOL That's all well and good, but there was only one stranger in the room (the new teacher). How fascinating will she be when she's spinning and flapping and screaming and there are 20 other children in the room? :nut

ChibiChibi is going back to school this year, too, as far as I know. When asked why she wanted to go back to public school, she answered, "It's a lot less work than homeschooling!" :eyesroll :LOL Poor kid, she wants everyone to believe that she's an idiot again and it's just not going to happen. Well, in my mother's house it might, but I'm going to behave myself and not go there. :eyesroll

eilonwy

09-01-2005, 10:12 AM

**I'd kind of like to start a thread about the funny things that kids say sometimes, because BeanBean has been a riot lately! The trouble is, I'm not sure that it's reasonable to start this thread in Toddlers, or The Childhood Years. What do you think?

Funny things that BeanBean has said over the past few days:

Me: BeanBean, what's on your fingernails?

BeanBean: What? (looking at nails) Oh! Yes, I am wearing nail polish. I decided to put some on. (Showing me his nails) It's purple. ( :laugh: )

***
(pointing to the :blah smilie): "This one looks just like me, he never shuts up!"

***
Me: Where do you live?
BeanBean: Right here in my house. (This is hilarious-- when I pressed him he gave me his full address; all I wanted was the city.)

***

BeanBean (Rubbing his belly button): I've got a baby in me.

Me: You can't have a baby in you, you're a boy. Only Mammas can have babies in them.

BeanBean: Yes I can! I can have a period and I can have a baby.

Me: Honey, only women can have periods. Girls can have them when they get older, but little boys can never have periods and they can never have babies.

BeanBean: Can ChibiChibi have a period?

Me: Yes, when she gets older.

BeanBean: Does your sister have a period?

Me: Yes.

BeanBean: And when BooBah gets older, she'll have a period and then she can have a baby inside, too?

Me: Yes, that's right.

BeanBean: Well, I want to get a period so I can have a baby.

Me: I'm sorry, but little boys can't get periods.

BeanBean: Well that's not very nice!

I managed to keep a straight face the whole time-- I totally think I deserve some kind of parenting award for that! :laugh: What inspired this conversation? Well, my 8 year old niece asked me what a period was last week, and I told her that it means that your body is ready to make a baby, but you can still be a little punk and not be ready to raise one. I guess BeanBean was paying more attention than I thought (he was busy crashing a toy Volkswagen at the time). :laugh:

loraxc

09-01-2005, 10:22 PM

Bwa haha! "That's not very nice." Thanks for giving me a laugh today, Rynna.

veiledexpressions, welcome. Your description of your son at 18 months reminds me a lot of where my daughter is right now (she's 19 months). It's fun to envision the future.

DD does have what I would call "night terrors" of a sort. She cries suddenly for literally like 10-30 seconds, but in a loud, I AM FREAKING kind of way. By the time we get in there, her eyes are closed and she appears asleep. ??? She has been doing this occasionally since about 11 months. I don't like it, but I don't really have a clue what to do about it.

We write down all kinds of funny things DD says. It particularly cracks me up the way she uses adult expressions. Let's see...today I heard:

"The canopy fell down. It's really TOO BAD." (My husband just constructed this elaborate sunshade canopy for the large windows on the side of our house. This of course fell down during the first good rainstorm. Didn't reinforce the grommets enough.) I had never heard her use that one before. Hee. It IS too bad, let me tell you.

OH! And the other day I got exasperated with her for taking an incredibly short nap and being totally unruly and screamy-wild during a diaper change, and spoke to her very shortly. A few minutes later I felt bad, and apologized, saying something like "I'm sorry I got mad, honey. Mama was a little upset."

She looked at me very wisely and said, "Mama have tantrum."

LOL. We just used the word with her for the first time the other day (I was explaining--yes, I overexplain--that I was not giving the broom back to her JUST because she had a tantrum, but because there's no rule against having the broom...she was just getting frustrated, so... :blah .)

Today she counted to 49 with me (that is, I say "one" she says "two," etc) with only one mistake. (She always skips 16, because she just really loves 17.) Pretty cool. She likes to count, and randomly asks us to do it from time to time. She's very fixated on Chicka Chicka 123 right now, especially the big spread with all the numbers from 1-100 in the back. Have I mentioned that I hate math and am intimidated by people who are good at it? :o

Karry

09-02-2005, 04:44 PM

Hi, I've enjoyed reading your descriptions of your kids. :D

My dd has recently started first grade. She was having a hard time for the first couple of weeks, and is just now doing better. Her teacher said academically she is fine, but not emotionally. Her teacher also said she was reading a level 12 book and they only go up to level 18 in first grade. I don't really understand what the levels mean, though she did say that most of the kids start at about a level 3. If she finishes reading level 18 books soon, what then? Will she be able to keep going on to second grade books? My MIL said that my BIL didn't start reading until first grade, but read all the first, second and third grade level books during first grade. I'll have to speak with her teacher to see what she'll do for dd.

isisjade

09-03-2005, 07:20 AM

SilverWillow

09-03-2005, 02:00 PM

loraxc

09-08-2005, 01:28 PM

Just bumping us a bit.

Britishmum, it's lovely to hear gifted kid school success stories. :)

We had another rite of passage the other day. DH (unwisely, IMO) told his mother that DD can recognize a bunch (I don't know how many, but more than 20) of sight words now. She told us this was "impossible." :LOL :nut Well, you know us--always making things up out of thin air! :mischief Not.

DD is really obsessed with counting right now. I blame Chicka, Chicka 123. :)

eilonwy

09-08-2005, 05:36 PM

We had another rite of passage the other day. DH (unwisely, IMO) told his mother that DD can recognize a bunch (I don't know how many, but more than 20) of sight words now. She told us this was "impossible." :LOL :nut Well, you know us--always making things up out of thin air! :mischief Not.

You know, this really gets on my nerves, and I should totally be immune to it now. It really pisses me off when people say "That's impossible" about something that a real person I've actually met/been has done. Maybe I'm just too sensitive, but it drives me up a freaking wall!! They can't say "that's unlikely" or "I've never heard of a child doing that," they just eliminate it because it's out of their realm of experience. :splat I can't stand it!

I haven't been feeling well over the past few days. I think I've got a stomach virus. It totally *sucks*. :sick

teachma

09-08-2005, 07:45 PM

Rynna, I hope you feel better soon!

Ds' kindergarten experience thus far, in a nutshell:
He was extremely apprehensive and cried while boarding the bus the first day. No tears since! He loves the teacher, the classroom, and most of all, the SCHEDULE! He asked if I could call his teacher to get a copy of the daily schedule to hang in his bedroom. That is so not surprising, if you know my son. I said no, he should let it be a surprise! His teacher also called and left a message the first day, saying that he built a wonderful structure in the block area with some friends. While I know it was a routine teacher phone call (I make them myself during the first week of school) it meant a lot to us because she mentioned he'd been playing WITH FRIENDS! So her message reinforced our goal of behaving socially. He has met on boy in another class with whom he enjoys playing at recess. i think they mostly play "chase" games, but as long as the other guy is a willing participant, I'm happy. It's much better than ds chasing kids who'd rather be left alone.

We have decided to go ahead with the testing at the end of October. We have figured that ds will inevitable encounter some rough patches, behaviour-wise and socially, and having some test scores to "back him up" might help in some way. So it will be 2 Sundays from 10:00-12:00. The psychologist said, after she listened to me speak about ds, "Well, at this time, I wouldn't say it's an absolute must, but it could be fun because it might generate some very interesting results." That, combined with my concerns for his well-beeing at school, as enough to make it a go.

Nothing else new with us- just trying to keep my head above water now that ds and I are both back at school. It's realllly hard!

USAmma

09-08-2005, 08:19 PM

:shy Okay while we are sharing artwork, I can't resist sharing some of Abi's! I don't know if this is "advanced" or not (well some of it is, at least the math concepts) but I'm really, really enjoying her drawings because it is a window into her mind.

A butterfly riding a roller coaster (http://im1.shutterfly.com/procserv/47b5d605b3127cce93f0d488926f00000036108IbNWLVu1bW) , complete with seat and seatbelt.

Math lesson (http://im1.shutterfly.com/procserv/47b5d605b3127cce93f0d574d20b00000026108IbNWLVu1bW) This is one that dh started to draw and then got interrupted by a phone call. Abi finished it. It's "Decimal Street" which she spelled "Desiml Street." It has houses of hundred's, ten's and one's. The Hundred's Castle has flags on it and it's daydreaming about doing math. (Nitara added a "sun" at the top of the picture.)

Magnetic board (http://im1.shutterfly.com/procserv/47b5d635b3127cce9339a1a46b9a00000026108IbNWLVu1bW) This is not art, but she was playing around with her magnetic board and made "sentences": Pet jig yes, Frog on log, Pam bac (bake) ham, wet cat.

A ballerina horse (http://im1.shutterfly.com/procserv/47b5d925b3127cce92c51e1174b400000016108IbNWLVu1bW) dancing on stage in the spotlight.

Ballerina cat (http://im1.shutterfly.com/procserv/47b5d925b3127cce92c51e10f58500000016108IbNWLVu1bW) wearing a tutu and sticking its tongue out.

Superman (http://im1.shutterfly.com/procserv/47b5d933b3127cce9296ece0ce6700000026108IbNWLVu1bW) pulling Abi out of a pit of mud with a rope. There is also a giant anthill and giant ants, and a dark cloudly sky with tornado to the right. I asked what were on their heads and she said, "umbrella hats!" :LOL

Fish tank (http://im1.shutterfly.com/procserv/47b5d933b3127cce9296ecef4f5800000016108IbNWLVu1bW)

Charlotte's Web (http://im1.shutterfly.com/procserv/47b5d933b3127cce9296ece94f5e00000016108IbNWLVu1bW) after hearing the book on CD. Big red barn with the web in one corner, spider hanging down. Wilber in his pen, a horse in another pen with a hay bale next to the pen. A smiling tornado to the right.

isisjade

09-08-2005, 09:47 PM

loraxc

09-08-2005, 10:51 PM

Hey USamma, where did you get that magnetic board and letters? I think my DD might like something like that sometime relatively soon. She is interested in making words with her Leapfrog Fridge Phonics thing, but it only has one of each letter.

I love the butterfly riding the rollercoaster!

eilonwy, I think perhaps we all need to take the Red Queen's motto from Alice in Wonderland: "Why, sometimes I've done six impossible things before breakfast!"

TiredX2

09-09-2005, 08:15 AM

DD started school last Wednesday. I miss her and wish I had any *real* idea what is going on, but she seems to like it.

My stress about her being placed in the wrong grade seems to have been misplaced, so far at least.

Unfortunately her math is so far way too easy. I have told her that maybe they are just getting used to stuff, trying to get everyone on the same page, etc... We were unschooling so I had never really found out what she knows, what she knows how to do, etc... and it's cool to see a bit of that. They did a few logic problems DD "got" right away but otherwise they are just doing place value and grouping :rolleyes (BTW, this class is *supposed* to be two grades ahead of her chrological age).

Her handwriting improved vastly by day 2. I *knew* she could write better than she did, but apparently I wasn't enough of an audience :LOL Now it looks like perfectly acceptable 2nd grade scrawl. I can't believe they have spelling tests, though she seems to like seeing her progress through the week (she practiced her words Tuesday, Wednesday & Thursday night).

She has been placed next to a very "young" first grade boy, so she is hoping to be moved soon. He was pencil fighting with the other kids, so gets to sit next to DD because she wont :rolleyes I want her to have friends, and peers, kwim? Not just kids who annoy the crap out of her.

DS starts preschool next Thursday. We'll see how that goes. He is very rarely willing to sing along with traditional songs ("Confrontation" from Les Mis? Yes. "Itsy Bitsy Spider"? No) so the teacher will probably think he has been severely neglected his whole poor short life.

USAmma

09-09-2005, 09:39 AM

Hey USamma, where did you get that magnetic board and letters? I think my DD might like something like that sometime relatively soon. She is interested in making words with her Leapfrog Fridge Phonics thing, but it only has one of each letter.

I got it through the Well-Trained Mind's website.
http://peacehillpress.com/index.asp?PageAction=VIEWPROD&ProdID=32

I got the one with two boards, which makes it much more child-friendly to use. Store the letters on one board and use the other for playing with letters.

lckrause

09-09-2005, 10:16 AM

USAmma, love the artwork. "Decimal Street" sounds like something Hollis would name one of his drawings. :D

I'm glad to hear that most kids here are having a good time at school. Nan started dance this week, and in a couple weeks the kids start the homeschool swim classes again. She's in the age 7-10 classes this year, which are a vast improvement over the 4-6 (now 4-7!) classes she's been stuck in for a while. In acro yesterday they were actually learning new stuff instead of doing straddle rolls and cartwheels over and over again. It's a miracle! :wink

Hollis and I are starting his chemistry stuff on Monday. Stay tuned for exciting developments on the next episode of "Mom doesn't know what the heck she's doing."

USAmma

09-09-2005, 02:26 PM

USAmma, love the artwork. "Decimal Street" sounds like something Hollis would name one of his drawings. :D

Actually that's what they call it in the math lesson. :) But I thought it was neat that she tried to spell it.

ChristaN

09-09-2005, 05:53 PM

I've been away from the boards for a while, so sorry if I am not caught up on what you all are talking about! I know that someone a ways back inquired about grade advancement for specific subjects & wanted to know if we had any luck in that area.

I really like dd's teacher this year & she had told me early on that, based on her informal evaluation, dd was reading around 7th-8th grade books. At parent orientation, she told us that she wasn't aware of there being any program at the school to advance for specific areas (what I had heard was through other parents and may have been rumor). She did mention testing for TAG, though.

I was a bit disappointed, but dd is really happy this year (almost every day has been "great"), so I figured that I'd give it a while & see how it went with the TAG testing. In any case, the teacher approached me after school today and (can I just brag :innocent ?), said that dd "blew her away" with the testing today. Dd apparently hit the ceiling on a large part of the test and tested at 12th grade reading level (she just turned 7 and is in 2nd grade)!

So, it at least sounds like she will be in TAG although it doesn't sound like specific area grade acceleration is going to happen. This is our first time around with TAG, so I don't know what to expect out of that, but hopefully she will be challenged and get to read interesting books rather than boring early readers.

I don't think that they have done math assessments yet, but dd is not nearly as advanced in math as she is in reading, so I'm not going to worry about that area. The kiddos also just started clogging lessons, and are having a blast. I am just so happy that my girls are having a good year. It is such a relief after last year!

teachma

09-09-2005, 07:18 PM

If I had a scanner, though, I would post a piece that he painted some time ago that says much about my DS's personality. We were painting at the art museum (maybe for the first time), and he drew six short, tentative lines, of varying colors. It is SO cautious and so sweet. That's one I'll save for sure.

It's so interesting how their artwork can be a total mirror of their personalities! By choice, my ds will only draw symmetrical designs, usually with straight lines, and sometimes quite ornately patterned- or, he'll do color-block stuff a la Mondrian. However, when asked (like at therapy, or now, at school) to draw something representational, he is able to draw the most detailed human- down to the fingernails and ear lobes- he would just never do this for "fun."

isisjade

09-09-2005, 07:22 PM

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eilonwy

09-09-2005, 08:35 PM

It's so interesting how their artwork can be a total mirror of their personalities!

:laugh:BeanBean's artwork consists of great, sweeping strokes of bright color (especially purple, but any will do). His prefered medium is markers on walls, though he did seem to thoroughly enjoy himself with stamp pads on the walls. :LOL What does that say about his personality? Larger than life, I guess! :LOL

Today, in a fit of je ne sais quois, I put a cute little barrette into BooBah's hair (purple, to match her outfit). BeanBean insisted on having one as well, so I pulled out the navy one. "Oh no, mamma," he said, "I want that one!" So I took out the bright pink barrette that he'd indicated. That's how my three year old son spent the morning-- wearing a bright pink barette and not a stitch else, going about his BeanBean business. :LOL He's quite a character!

allgirls

09-11-2005, 08:17 AM

wow...this thread always gets ahead of me!

USAmma!~Thanks for posting that website...I have bookmarked it...looks like some great items/ideas on there!

There are some awesome artists among your kids...I am noticing that my dd is also pretty good at drawing...you should have seen the whale she drew on her magna doodle...it was quite recognisable...I wanted to take a pic of it but it got erased.

She is also trying to print her letters now...she does a very good H...I love watching her...she will say "one line down, another line down, one line across...H!!" as she is printing...so cute!

Yesterday as a light turned red when I turned left at a light she got very angry and said "no, it's red, it's red, that's iwegal"...lol...it's so cute to hear that little voice say things like that! :LOL

I am not having much energy for her these days but she is thriving despite it. I am ever so grateful she plays so well independantly. She likes preschool but is not really playing much with the kids...which is kind of frustrating as that was the whole point. But as long as she is content there I will continue to let her go. I notice she gravitates to older kids when there is a choice and I think it's because they talk so much better.

Several times now in the recent weeks she's been called "a little genius" by people we know...it's kind of taken me by surprise...but she communicates so well and the things she talks about and the questions she asks really surprises people...I constantly get asked "how old is she" and a shocked look when I say 26mos. Or I get "she's really tiny for her age" and then they realise she's only 2 :LOL .

Anyway...sorry to brag on her so much...with another baby coming in about 5 wks I figure I won't get much chance.

I wish I could respond more personally to threads but I get so far behind...but I do love reading about your little ones...I learn so much and get so many ideas from you ladies.

eilonwy

09-13-2005, 11:24 AM

:wave Just a quickie today: Yesterday, someone asked BeanBean how old he was and he said, "I'll be three on my birthday." :LOL The woman who asked him was there with her son (about 16) and the kid just cracked up. :LOL

I talked to a lifeguard yesterday about swim lessons for BeanBean-- we werent' sure what group to put him in, since the preschool group lessons are for "three to five year olds" and have three levels, and the parent/child lessons are for 6-36 month olds. She said that it would be in BeanBean's best interest to put him in the second level of the preschool classes, because he could already do everything that they'd be trying to teach him in the first level and that parent/child classes are for kids who can't/won't swim on their own (which BeanBean most assuredly does). :thumb I told her that he won't be three until November, and she said that she's never seen a child under the age of four swim the way he does. :shrug It's all good, though. By the time we can afford to put him into lessons, he'll probably be at the third level of the preschool classes. :D Go, BeanBean! :LOL

CAmomto1

09-15-2005, 01:49 PM

I have some good news that I wanted to share with more than just DH. :)

After worrying all summer about DD, school, placement, being challenged, approaching the teacher, etc. etc. etc. I had something good happen. Twice, DD's teacher has taken me aside to ask *me* how I'm feeling about DD and what she's been doing, and did I have any concerns. Today, she brought up the idea of a grade skip and invited me to observe the first grade class if I wanted to. I told her that ideally, I'd like for DD to stay in her class because it is a good place for her socially and emotionally, and have her (the teacher) differentiate the curriculum for DD as needed. Her reply was essentially that she'd like to do that, that she enjoys challenges like that. :) Before I left DD's teacher told me that she would be keeping her eye on DD and that we should keep our conversation going.

I feel so relieved to know that we are all truly on the same side and are all wanting to do what is going to be best for DD as a whole person.

Yesterday when she asked me if I had any concerns or feedback, I let her know that I wanted to make sure she gave DD a chance to really stretch her mind and show her what she's capable of. She let me know that she has already started pulling her aside to work with her one on one and start assessing where she is at. (I know where she's at, but it's better to ler her see it for herself than try to tell her what I see at home.)

I'm just so pleased that the school experience is going well so far and that we aren't facing any battles.

ChristaN

09-15-2005, 02:45 PM

CAmom,
That sounds so much like my dd's experience this year. Last year was a misery and I was really worried going into this school year. She is in second grade now. I've had virtually the same conversation w/ dd's teacher, too. She's awesome!

What was also really wonderful for my dd was that we adopted a manatee for her classroom from the Save the Manatee Club. I told dd that they might not be able to put the posters up, etc. The teacher, however, not only put up the pictures, but she revamped the whole science curricula for this week so that all they are learning about this week is manatees and their relatives. They are doing manatee math, had a speaker in who had been swimming with manatees, etc. My dd is in heaven with such a supportive teacher. The teacher also seems to be keenly aware of dd's different academic needs and is really working with her to meet them.

Now, I just have to worry about next year :LOL !

loraxc

09-15-2005, 09:16 PM

:angry

Can I vent for a minute?

DD is obsessed with learning the names of birds. (I think I've talked about this before.) We have multiple bird guides around the house and they are among her most cherished possessions. She is just starting to really get into pretend play and imaginary play, and sometimes talks about things the birds in the books are "doing." Yesterday there was a whole monologue: "The Connecticut warblers are making pasta again!" (She also loves to read our pasta machine manual. ) DH told his mom this story because he thought it was cute, and because his whole family enjoys nature and birdwatching. MIL's response?

"That's just weird. You don't want her to be weird like that." :( :irked:

lckrause

09-16-2005, 09:47 AM

Lorax :Hug I'm sorry to hear your MIL is not being supportive. I think your DD sounds awesome. :love Reading the pasta machine manual is cracking me up. One time Hollis found the insert that comes with the tampons and was distraught because he thought I was going to die from toxic shock syndrome. :LOL Poor Hollis.

ChristaN

09-16-2005, 10:20 AM

"That's just weird. You don't want her to be weird like that."
Oh, that's just mean. I hope that she doesn't express cruel sentiments like that to your dd when she gets older!

Maybe you can find some birding activity that she can join in. My dd's obsession is ocean mammals. We have tried as best we can in our landlocked state to let her explore that by adopting sea animals through rescue organizations for her -- she gets newsletters from these organizations, too.

If we ever can manage to go home to the Bay Area, I plan to see if we can set her up to volunteer at the Marine Mammal Center. Actually, where we are, the Rocky Mountain Raptor program allows kids to volunteer with parents (they rehab injured birds of prey). I wonder if there is anything like that around you.

loraxc

09-16-2005, 11:57 AM

Thanks for the support. I was surprised by this comment, since they aren't the kind of family who is obsessed with fitting in...or so I thought. I think she really reacted negatively to the whole idea of DD sight-reading and now thinks we are trying to raise some kind of freaky genius. :(

I mean, sometimes I worry too, but really, I just thought that was an innocently cute story. Some kids get obsessed with dinosaurs or contruction equipment and know all THEIR names, and people don't think that's weird, do they?

Some time when she's a bit older we will start taking her "birdwatching" (starting with really big waterbirds, which are easy to see). Actually, I might take her to PetSmart this weekend. I don't like those places, but she is so interested in parakeets right now ("They are green like frogs and have long long tails!") and I'm sure she'd love to see some real ones.

(As a side note, I was just reading somewhere about Gardner's theory of multiple intelligences and was intrigued to learn that the theory includes a "naturalist intelligence," which is all about being skilled at identifying, classifying and observing nature.)

eilonwy

09-16-2005, 05:52 PM

You know, my mom is always telling me that my kids are not weird enough... :LOL I'd take it as a compliment, right up until the "You don't want her to be weird like that" comment, at which point I'd become snarky. :mischief

I'm proud to be a mamma to strange children! :kewl

People at the pool have been commenting on BeanBean's swimming ability a lot lately. I usually say something like, "he really loves the water!" but people just keep looking at him and then at me and Mike and I can see the gears working, trying to figure out how two obvoiously-out-of-shape parents got a kid who swims like a fish. It's kind of strange. Noone says, "wow, you must work with him a lot," because it's obviously not like he's being taught to be happy in the water. I've only had one person ask how we got him to do that, but we really didn't do anything so I didn't know what to say... :shrug It's odd. They have this really funny look when they watch him swim, I have no idea how to interpret it....:shrug I'm not sure what to make of it all, it seems like a lot of fuss over something that I thought was pretty normal. :shrug I mean, ChibiChibi swam the first time she got into a swimming pool at 22 months, just like a little fish... I never had a problem with the water, and neither did Mike... it just seemed perfectly natural that our kids would be at ease in the water. BooBah doesn't swim as actively as BeanBean does, but people are shocked that she holds her breath and goes underwater eagerly, of her own accord. They don't watch her the way that they watch BeanBean, though.. like they're seeing something totally unheard of.... :scratch I'm a bit puzzled by it all. :shrug

teachma

09-16-2005, 07:17 PM

Some kids get obsessed with dinosaurs or contruction equipment and know all THEIR names, and people don't think that's weird, do they?

What do you think about the following, my 5 yo ds's current obsessions: the Chinese Zodiac and knowing the signs of everyone in the family as well as the birthstones of all our relatives and the countries/continents where these stones are most commonly mined? He is also in love with volcanoes, and he often assumes the role of a "guy who makes volcanoes" by crawling deep under the earth's crust and pushing up slowly to release the lava, which he alternately calls lava and strangely made up chemical sounding words? I am beginning to realize that when his mind is filled up with these ideas and he's obsessing about them, he is too busy to obsess about my death, poison, or any other anxiety-inducing ideas. So I am newly in love with his obsessions because they seem to keep him sane!

loraxc

09-17-2005, 07:04 AM

Chinese Zodiac, eh? :thumb I actually find the "obsessions" kind of neat, and very interesting. DD's biggest one is definitely birds, but she also is very interested in:

Maps
Butterflies (we have a field guide for these also)
Snakes and frogs
Snails (and spirals, and anything with a "nested circle" shape)

Oh, and the (illustrated) pasta machine manual! (She likes to flip through it muttering, "Tagliatelle. Fettucini. Ravioli. Gnocchi. Spaghetti...")

Britishmum, :LOL at the fire extinguisher story!

ChristaN

09-17-2005, 10:09 AM

My dds like the Chinese Zodiac signs as well. I suspect it has something to do with the fact that they are impressive animals (tiger and dragon) and can beat up mom and dad (a rat and a dog). :LOL

EXOLAX

09-18-2005, 12:32 AM

Hi Ladies! I kind of introduced myself in an earlier message on labels. We have two DD's, our eldest is 4 and our youngest is 15 months. They are both so unique and special it's pretty incredible. ;) It's fun to have a place where one can go and actually post about our children's advacements w/o people looking at us like we are putting on airs.

I've loved looking at the artwork some of your kids have done. I'm fascinated by children's art! I think children's art can be so expressive. I do have some questions for you all though. Our eldest is challenging in that she has the memory of an elaphant. She seems to have a bit of an eidetic memory. Now I think a lot of kids have this, but boy, it seems pretty pronounced in our little girl. So far it seems sound based, if she hears something once it's in her head forever. She's always been that way, making crazy connections since before she could talk (at 14 months old she went over to a fire-hydrant and signed water, though we never could figure out how she knew that. She didn't watch TV and we had never seen on in action in real life, maybe from a book?). But, all parents think their kids are really smart. ;) I did though read somewhere that children can start to loose their capacity for memory around age 5. Does anyone have an references on that?

But, I digress. We recently have begun having some issues with artwork around our house. Our DD sees things in her head one way and tries to draw it, while she has exceptional fine motor skills she can't get it out exactly as it is in her head and this is incredibly frustrating for her. So frustrating in fact that she doesn't want to draw. She's become a perfectionist about it. Does anyone have any suggestions on how to best help her work through this? We've been going to museums with her for years and we talk about how everyone draws, paints, works with clay etc. differently and how all art is unique and seen through different etc.... nothing seems to work though. I feel very sad for her about it because it seems to effect her so deeply.

I don't have anything recent to share as far as her art goes because I do not have much need to scan it in, but here are some from just a few weeks after she turned 3; http://iraq.roothat.com/taji5/tajimywall2.jpg. She was big into writing (still is). And http://iraq.roothat.com/taji5/tajimywall3.jpg (This one has a picture she drew of her Daddy with a bucket, I can't remember what was in and going in the bucket though). She is still big into pottery as well.

I also find how kids obsess on things fascinating. Our eldest is currently obsessed with astronomy. She's big into following the phases of the moon and the earth's shadow and constellations. She looks to the sky almost every night to see if it is clear enough to get out our old telescope. She's also into vowels and 'silly silent e' and likes to find that silly e in the words of books we read. She learned about it last year when she was 3 and we were eating dinner at the 'Life Cafe'. She wanted to read the sign and we sounded out LIFE together and she told me I forgot a letter, the letter e, so I was sitting there having a conversation with our 3 year old about silent e. It was then I started worrying that I couldn't keep up with her. But, she has an imagination that blows my mind away. She went around the rest of the week saying she was a silent e and tried changing the sounds of words around.

Her younger sister has been _obsessed_ with books since just after she turned 1. You can read to her for hours and it still isn't enough. It's about the only time she will sit still too! ;)

I'm interested to hear how others have handled these types of things.

Xaloxe

LeftField

09-18-2005, 07:54 AM

Xaloxe,

That is wonderful artwork! Wrt to the perfectionism, I had to go in the other room when ds drew. If I were there, he'd either feel crowded or he'd express frustration that he couldn't do things, etc. I found that if I quietly went off in the other room, that he'd draw and draw. Most of the pictures I posted were drawn when I was in the other room; I had no idea he was doing it. I wonder if that would help?

As for obsessions, my oldest's outer space obsession isn't as strong as it used to be, but it's still present. He's getting into geography, so he loves GoogleEarth and maps. He also loves NASA's interactive planet setup.

He had a body obsession when he was 3. It started out as a bones obsession. We go to the chiropractor's and she was very kind to him, letting him hold her authentic human skull and showing him things on the spine model. Then, he learned about blood vessels and he became very interested in hearts and blood vessels. He drew lots of skeleton pictures and many of people with blood vessels. The most graphic one he drew was of a man with a hole in his torso, his skeleton laying next to him. He was mentally trying to process how they get a real human spine to make chiropractic models on. He still doesn't know about death, but he reasoned that they got it from a person who "doesn't talk anymore". The weird thing with this obession is that he gets incredibly freaked out by human body exhibits and books, even though he's obsessed with it. We once had to leave one, because they put a cowboy hat on their skeleton and it greatly upset him.

He still hasn't gone back to drawing. :( However, he's really into building toys right now and I think he has a hard time doing both. He really throws himself into things and lives/eats/breathes it, and so I think he has to drop art to do construction. He was very upset at bedtime last night, because he was hoping to make an excavator with his Meccano set. As soon as his little feet hit the floor this morning, he went to the Meccano set and began busily building. He's been there for over an hour. I'm not sure if he's even had breakfast.

lckrause

09-18-2005, 09:37 AM

Xaloxe, about the art frustrations, when my daughter was going through that I showed her studies of some of the art on our walls (Waterhouse). It helped her to see that even great artists don't get it perfect the first time and have to practice first before they make something. It wasn't a cure-all but it did help.

lckrause

09-18-2005, 11:34 AM

Cool, Britishmum! I printed out a certificate for Hollis. :)

m&m

09-18-2005, 02:17 PM

Xaloxe

My oldest dd sounds a lot like yours. Huge memory, early talker and reader, excellent fine motor skills, etc. And she too has a passion for art but gets frustrated with her attempts for it to come out right.

What has helped her is for me and others we know to show her our early works (kid art) as well as to attempt a very complex drawing only to have it not turn out right. Then I would explain to her that with every skill there is a learning curve, and even though gifted people can skip some parts of the curve to jump ahead, they still have to start near the bottom or middle before they can get to the top. There are many books on "How to teach your child to draw" and these show wonderful examples of kid art and its stages. My dd discovered that even though hers aren't where SHE wants them to be - they are well above the norm and she is improving all the time.

The other book my dd loves is called "Ish" by Peter Reynolds. It is about a boy who gives up drawing because his brother critisizes it. By the end he learns that things do not need to look perfect. It doesn't need to look like a vase of flowers, it only needs to be vase-ish. :D

After all art is an interpretation of your mood, the lighting, etc. not only realism.

I've given my dd many "assignments" from dot drawings, line drawings, tracing, digital photography, etc. She loves all of these. Even playdough has its art days and its just smoosh it days. After all some of these art materials are just FUN.

jordmoder

09-19-2005, 12:44 AM

Hello, everyone

I've been lurking off and on for a while. We have two boys, Noah who is 5 and 11/12s, thank you very much and Nathaniel 3 1/3. I've always known that they are bright kids, inquisitive, perceptive, aware ... Noah is an aural learner and will remember EVERYTHING you tell him (and he has a voluminous memory!) and Nathaniel is so quick with his wit.

I guess by way of introduction I'll share some of Noah and my bedtime ramblings. This one last week. Noah: "Mom, what's A-OK mean?" Me: a somewhat long-winded explanation of where the OK came from and that basically A-OK meant in some sense, the best. Noah: "then, Z-NotOK must be the worst." Me: "I suppose you could say so." Noah: "Then, A-NotOk and Z-OK must be the same" Me: "Oh, yeah!" He's in Grade Zero, which is what he calls Kindergarten. Preschool is Negative One (or Negative Two, in the case of his brother) He has refused to stand up for the pledge of allegience (public school public school public school) because he says it's not important, but really it's because he's being told to do something en masse and he is just not a group guy.

Last week Nathaniel and I were in the parking lot at the Farmer's Market and ran into an aquaintance. She commented on his "3-2-1 Blast-off!" T shirt, and shared that when she was a child she had a teacher named Mrs. Rocket, and that her hair was cone shaped. Without a seconds pause, Nathaniel states: "I had a teacher named Mrs. Car and she had wheels on her head!" and then, because we were standing next to a bin of corn he went on to "Mrs. Corn who had bumps (kernals) all over her body"

We moved back to the small town where Noah was born so he could "start" school here - although it's small (5000+) there is a goodly population of enlightened people. I had always thought that we would homeschool - I've agonized for years over what his experience in public school would be like - but he and I are so much alike that I haven't been convinced I would be able to be his best teacher. And his kindergarten teacher is a friend of mine, and AWESOME and yet and yet and yet I already know that he is going to be sooooooo bored and I don't know what quite to do.

Whew! this was a book, sorry! but when I tell people about the conversations Noah and I have they look at me like I have three not just two heads and it's good to share with people who will just laugh knowingly.

Oh, yeah - Noah is 3 1/2 and just self-toilet trained. He is fascinated by the availability of his penis. We're driving on the highway and a convertible goes by. He says: "A convertible is something that changes, right?" "Yes" I acknowledge. He says with GREAT glee "My penis is a convertible!!" I just about ran off the road I was laughing so hard.

thanks for listening

Barbara, tired, but exceptionally grateful mama

mcsarahb

09-19-2005, 04:28 PM

CAmomto1

09-19-2005, 06:37 PM

The other book my dd loves is called "Ish" by Peter Reynolds. It is about a boy who gives up drawing because his brother critisizes it. By the end he learns that things do not need to look perfect. It doesn't need to look like a vase of flowers, it only needs to be vase-ish.

Thanks for the book suggestion - my DD has a pretty strong perfectionism streak in her (three guesses if anyone else in her family has it too ;)), and this sounds like something that might be good for me to look for in the library.

supervee

09-20-2005, 04:57 AM

oh, bless your hearts for commiseration and the recommendation for the book called Ish. I will find this book. We were just in tears here this morning over this.

BoyGirlTwinsAPMama

09-20-2005, 02:30 PM

"A convertible is something that changes, right?" "Yes" I acknowledge. He says with GREAT glee "My penis is a convertible!!"
Barbara,

Absolutely adorable stories about your boys! Thanks for sharing!

About the mother whose dd is a perfectionist and can't draw what she wants to, I just want to say that soooo many artists are the same way as adults too. Picasso threw away more paintings than what he showed b/c they weren't good enough in his opinion, and there are many other masters who did the same thing. Perhaps after much practice and sketches and trials she will be able to put what is in her mind onto the paper/board/canvas/whatever medium she wants to work in, and perhaps not. But is there any way she can accept her limitations as such and then work with what talent she has now? The process of art is just as important as the final piece. Are you able to teach your dd that the *process* is important, not just the finished product or the accolades from same? I feel that if an artist can enjoy the process and not *judge* the product, then she will learn a great lesson for her lifetime and enjoy her creativitymore. Living with and growing up in a family of and being a tortured artist, I share with you my personal life's lesson. :o

eilonwy

09-21-2005, 12:20 AM

I just finished reading a book called Gifted Children: Myths and Realities by Ellen Winner (maybe Eilleen, but I think it was Ellen). I really enjoyed it, although I think some of it was totally outrageous. For example: it's been widely found that "gifted children are either first-born or only children." I really have to take issue with that-- I've met way too many gifted children who had lots of siblings or who weren't first-borns. I've also met lots of gifted siblings, and heard tell of even more. It really makes me wonder what criteria these studies are using for "gifted," and whether or not they bothered to test siblings. It's either entirely wrong, regardless of all the studies "proving" it to be true, or my family and every other family I've ever met is entirely anomalous-- which leads me to another line of thought: is there, perhaps, something about the gene package that certain people carry relating to giftedness which predicts heritability or lack thereof? Maybe my mother just has a particularly "heritable" sort of giftedness, which would cause her to have five children, every one of whom would qualify as gifted in the overwhelming majority of those studies? :scratch Who knows? What I know is this: I might count as a first-born for those studies, but I probably wouldn't because my next sibling is only ten months younger than I am (thus, I didn't recieve any of the benefits of being a first-born, because my mother was pregnant from the time I was 5 weeks old). It just seems totally crazy to me. :nut

It was a fun read, though. They talked about craziness and stressful childhoods, and she brought up a really fascinating theory about testosterone exposure in utero and spatial abilities. Of course it was one more way in which I, personally, am anomalous, but it's all good-- I'm used to being a freak. :LOL

EXOLAX

09-21-2005, 12:55 AM

Thanks so much for all of the replies regarding our DD's perfectionism toward her art. This board has proven to be a great resource! I'm so excited! There were so many responses I'm just going to touch on a couple here.

Someone suggested to have DD do art alone. As soon as I read that it rang so many bells in my head it made my ears ring! ;) DD loves to draw in the car and we don't have the issues then. This had not even dawned on me! We are going to try working on that in the house, with us quietly leaving the room when she begins to work on an art project of any kind. The implications are a little unsettling though.

We have come up with a few other ideas as well. We've been taking DD to our local art museum since she was one and we plan to go back this weekend but we will focus on looking at the differences of specific items (say a tree) from painting to painting, and artist to artist. We've also been talking about putting on our own children's art show with some of her friends here at the house. This was her idea and I was a little concerned at first because I thought she might put too much pressure on herself, but she seems to be too excited by the idea to care. We'll have to see.

Ok, who suggested the book "Ish"? (I'm too busy typing to go back and look ;) ) DH picked this up today and I must say that independently of each other this book made both of us weepy! DH read it to DD tonight and when I came into the room later she said "Mom, I learned something new from this book. You can draw something the same, but different, and it's still beautiful". I can't tell you how many times we have told her that same thing (not near as simplistically mind you) but just reading it once spurred this comment.

DH also took his time at the book store and read another book by the same author called "The Dot" and he brought it home as well. This is such a sweet book and fits right in theme! It's about a little girl in an art class who at the end of the day still has a blank canvas because she doesn't feel her art would be 'good enough'. The teacher tells her to just make a mark on the paper and the girl makes a dot, then the teacher tells her to sign it. The next class the girl walks in and sees her 'dot' framed up on the wall and decides she could make a better dot. In the end she has all kind of dot and dot free paintings on display and a little boy tells her he wishes he could be an artist too but he can't even draw a straight line. The little girl tells him to try and he makes a squiggly line on a piece of paper, she then tells him to sign it. So beautiful!!!

On another note for those constellations junkies out there DH also picked up a copy of "The Zoo in the Sky" which is all about animal constellations.

Just yesterday DD came up to me and asked me to draw a tree for her because (and here is what she said to me): "My tree wouldn't be good enough, and that would break my heart. I don't want my heart to break.". Later DH told me they were in the same room together and she kept drawing trees. She showed one to him and asked him to help her because she wanted to draw a tree for me and "it just wasn't right". She told him "I want it to be beautiful for mama, and my tree isn't beautiful". After hearing this I asked her later if I could see the tree she originally drew for me. She went and got it. It had a big trunk, and a bushy green top, but right in the middle of the trunk was a big heart all colored in red. It was so "beautiful", it about broke my heart.