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mamanOiseau
08-30-2005, 09:34 AM
Hi everybody !

I'm a mom to a 5yo dd, a 3yo ds and a 5week old ds. I always try (and sometimes succeed ...) to be a GD mom, but this is my first post on this forum (that I have been reading daily for a while now!).

We were away this week-end with all my dh's family. My kiddos are the only grand-children :irked: so they are pretty much the center of attention as far as kids go. My mil has apparently created quite a reputation for my lively and determined 5yo dd - one of the aunts, whom I had only met once, and who had never seen my dd before, came up to me just after we arrived, and asked me very sweetly "so, is she being more reasonable now?". I was astonished by the comment, and aswered something to the effect that, yes, she is quite independent, isn't she. Thanks, mil, can't you show off all her qualities instead of going on about her "bad" sides ?

Anyway, there was a pool at this place, and after 2 days of lots of swimming and little sleep - guess what, the kids were exhausted, what a surprise. Comes the time to leave, dd didn't have her t-shirt on, I bring her the green one but she wants the white one and bursts out crying while telling me that she wants the white one. I was saying nothing and squatted down to listen to her. Immediately, one aunt and my mil started on about how she should hush up, what a fuss, blablabla, who cares if it's green or white, etc. I had a hard time actually understanding dd with these 2 women carrying on that way (they really are quite charming and were probably thinking they were helping...). Anyway, I had dd walk with me to the car, and we negotiated that we would find the white tshirt in the suitcase, but since I didn't know where the grey socks (her "travel" socks, says she) were, she would have to do without. Dd quite satisfied, cooperates greatly, and waits patiently in the car once the tshirt is found.

Then I walk back to say good-bye to everybody. Mil asks me were dd is, I answer in the car, she then asks with some kind of sarcasm "with the white tshirt?". I answer yes, and ???? why did I then feel so guilty that I had actually "given in" and found the white tshirt for her ??? (and mil looked at the aunt with that hummphff look on her face). So, I had to get it out of the suitcase for her, big deal ??? No ????

Did I do the right thing ? I've been thinking about it since, can't get it of my mind ! :irked:




Harper
08-30-2005, 09:41 AM
I think you did the right thing and I think your mil and aunt summed it up perfectly when they said who cares if it's green or whiteNobody cared but your dd so why shouldn't she have the white shirt? You knew she was worn out and forcing her to wear the green shirt would have only made it worse.

greenbean
08-30-2005, 09:45 AM
It is just a shirt and if that shirt was going to make the ride home more enjoyable because your dd was happy then yes you did the right thing in my opinion.

CRISSY
08-30-2005, 09:57 AM
Hay girl right on. You did the right thing. They are only little once. Somtimes simple things that makes there life aswell as yours a little happier it's so worth it.
lol
crissy

Eggie
08-30-2005, 10:02 AM
You did great :thumb
Maybe they were jealous thinking about how their own mothers weren't as cute as you when they were little kids :wink :LOL
Every time my DD complains so much about wearing a different outfit, I just try to remember how awful I feel when I have my mind set on something I want to wear and for some reason I can't (itīs in the laundry, need some ironing, etc) and I do feel upset, now, I have 32 years more than her and the feelings are exactly the same... time and experience will teach her how to handle better those.... meanwhile, I'm here for here :love

mamanOiseau
08-30-2005, 10:08 AM
thanks for all your posts ! I'm feeling much better about the whole thing :p

LoveBeads
08-30-2005, 10:46 AM
Whenever this kind of thing comes up for me, I cheerfully say, "I'm picking my battles" and leave it at that. Any repeated judgments that are thrown at me are met with the same line being repeated: "I'm picking my battles".

I would have done the exact same thing that you did - if it's so important for her to wear the white shirt, what's the harm?