My brother, (just 19 yo) can't believe we didnt cir our ds. He has a view that what ever I say, just doesnt hold up, and that we should just "cut it off" because he "wont remember it". Its more of an unknowing, go with the flow, joking type of attitude. Ignorace, and the desire to stay that way.
I'm firm in my decision, so he's not persuadeing me, but I want to persuade HIM. How to I talk to him and let him know that he is wrong?

If he's 19, I think you should try renting him a copy of Penn & Teller's show Bullsh!t! on circumcision. He is exactly their key demographic!

Above all, I would be gentle with him - don't make him defensive. He had no control over being circed, and if you want to get around his defenses so his future sons will be intact, just be matter-of-fact but gentle.

The problem is that the average circumcised guy hears "extra sensitivity" but what registers in his brain is "premature ejaculation" and his response is predictably "I'm already almost too sensitive, I don't want it to be any more sensitive."

They don't have the parts to provide the other type of sensitivity so they can't imagine it. Imagine a man who has perfect 20/20 vision or better except that he's totally color blind. If you tell him that there is a process that will give him more visual sensitivity, he's not going to really understand what you're saying. He has no more concept of what red, blue or green is than a circumcised man has a concept of what a complete sexual experience is. Neither has the receptors to understand it.

I have tried to explain it to my brother numerous times and every time he says "But I'm almost too sensitive already. I don't want to be any more sensitive!" He can only imagine that he would be so sensitive that he would be plagued with premature ejaculation. He can't get his head around that a foreskin could help him not have premature ejaculation. It's a totally foreign concept.



Frank

I agree with Frank (but then we don't I :D )

The problem is that the average circumcised guy hears "extra sensitivity" but what registers in his brain is "premature ejaculation" and his response is predictably "I'm already almost too sensitive, I don't want it to be any more sensitive."

They don't have the parts to provide the other type of sensitivity so they can't imagine it. Imagine a man who has perfect 20/20 vision or better except that he's totally color blind. If you tell him that there is a process that will give him more visual sensitivity, he's not going to really understand what you're saying. He has no more concept of what red, blue or green is than a circumcised man has a concept of what a complete sexual experience is. Neither has the receptors to understand it.

My vote is for denial rather than an inability to grasp the concept. I luckily have got better than 20/20 vision, but while not totally color blind, I do have some color-blindedness. If I was told that someone went out of MY way and, to keep it simple, circumcised just my eyes (let alone my penis), I'd be pissed!!

And since it's so convenient, I'll bring my idiot brother in the mix again. Frank, maybe our brothers are the same person since mine gave me the exact same argument that yours did. Mine agreed when I asked if more of a good thing is better. He agreed when I said that premature ejaculation can affect anyone - circumcised or not. Not to get too tawdry, but he also agreed when I said that it takes time to develop one's control and stamina. Yet, too much sensation - BAD. Ugh! I like to consider him the black sheep of the family, but since there's only the two of us, maybe I'm the black sheep.

Well, depending on who I'm talking to, my 5 second anti-circ lines are usually:

"Why would I chop up a perfectly good baby?"

-or-

"You want me to cut off part of his dick??? That's f****ed up!"

Of course I'm always ready to go into a discussion, but those are the ones I use when I can only make a comment in passing.

I don't know but this is always a weird thing for me. I'm a senior apprentice midwife and often couples ask us if we do the circ. When we say no they want to know where to get it done. The midwives in my area give resources, none really speak up against routine circ. When I try to lead them towards the idea of not circing the men get angry. I think we have lost interviews because of this subject.

When I am a licensed midwife on my own I plan to include circ info and tell them that if they want to circ it is in their hands but for now I have to toe the line with the midwife who mentors me. The men who are circed (they all seem to be) actually tend to laugh when I site the reason of pain as one of the many reasons not to do it. They claim that they can't remember it so it must not have been so bad. :(

If he's 19, I think you should try renting him a copy of Penn & Teller's show Bullsh!t! on circumcision. He is exactly their key demographic!

Above all, I would be gentle with him - don't make him defensive. He had no control over being circed, and if you want to get around his defenses so his future sons will be intact, just be matter-of-fact but gentle.

this seems to work the best with the guys I know around my age (early 20's)- Thank you Penn and Teller!!! :Bow

I'd put it to him as a matter of choice: "We think the decision is best left to our ds. It's his penis, it should be his choice whether to be circ'ed or not. If we have it done when he's a baby, he'll never have that choice."

Yeah, it does seem counterintuitive, but it's not a matter of more or less sensitivity, it's a matter of different kinds of sensitivity.

Maybe this well help:

Premature ejaculation. Lakshmanan & Prakash report that the foreskin impinges against the corona glandis during coitus.15 The foreskin, therefore, tends to protect the corona glandis from direct stimulation by the vagina of the female partner during coitus. The corona is the most highly innervated part of the glans penis.19 Zwang argues that removal of the foreskin allows direct stimulation of the corona glandis and this may cause premature ejaculation in some males.31 O'Hara & O'Hara reported more premature ejaculation in circumcised male partners.40 The presence of the foreskin, therefore, may make it easier to avoid premature ejaculation, while its absence would make it more difficult to avoid premature ejaculation.
(http://www.cirp.org/library/sex_function/)

where can I get a copy of the penn and teller video...?
my brother is pretty superfiscial (sp) so I think he's scared to even think of not doing it to his son. But with age, hopefully will come maturity, and when he does have children (hopefully, a long time from now) he will be open to a real discussion.
If i can get ahold of that video i'll show that too him too...
thanks

There's a seller on ebay selling legal copies: http://tinyurl.com/c3qys