What has helped you the most in your recovery?

[LisaG]

4 weeks ago tonight I started bleeding. Sunday's tend to be a hard day for me since then. Tomorrow I start back to work following an almost 2 week vacation. I feel no more recharged than before I left for vacation. I feel flat and empty and dread having to fake it tomorrow. I wish I had an anonymous office job in front of a computer. Instead I help people and I feel like I have barely enough fuel to run myself let alone offer any insight or support or healing touch to others. But the reality is there are bills to be paid and no work equals no income, so I must suck it up and do the best I can.

I reserved some books at the library that I found about miscarriage. My dh is good support but most of my other support is far away. Plus I have this tendency to isolate and try to do everything all by myself which doesn't work too well in times like this.

And then there's this push to hurry up and heal enough to try again. We've spent so much of our ttc journey waiting to actually ttc, it seems like I shouldn't take precious time being depressed.

So where is that magic wand ladies? Who's got the get out of grief for free card? I know, I know, no free rides anywhere with this. Words of wisdom appreciated though.

Lisa

[taradt]

:Hug no words of wisdom, just wishing you a peaceful day today

tara

[NWmt_mama]

I am so sorry for your loss. It is so difficult to go through and I really wish none of us had to!

I am still riding the wave of recovery, but I find that some things have helped me heal - taking time to feel sad and shut down, taking walks, excercising, feeling physically better (this took about 2 weeks after my m/c), keeping busy (the first week back at work was tough and had a hard time concentrating), talking about it with friends and dh, and putting away anything connected to pregnancy and babies for a later date. Not feeling pregnant really helped me heal. It was very difficult to feel pregnant while I wasn't. Sadly, it takes a while to heal physically.

I hope you start feeling better soon.

If anyone else out there has more suggestions, or a magic wand, pass it on!

[Lynski]

I'd like to sign up for the magic wand too please.

I'm sorry, I know it's so hard. It's tough to deal with people all day long when you just want to curl up and cry. The only thing that really helps is, unfortunately, time. I hope you feel stronger soon. Try not to be too hard on yourself in the meantime, and take the time to grieve.

[happeeevraftr]

I just started miscarrying on Monday and I was only 5 weeks, but this is at least my 3rd m/c and I'm 99% positive I've had at least 2 others. One thing that is helping me is to think that now that I've had 3 confirmed miscarriages, maybe the doctors will start to believe that there is a problem, and these aren't just flukes, which is what they've told me before. So now I'm looking forward to maybe seeing a specialist in recurrent miscarriages and looking for what may be causing them and some solutions.

Also, I tried making some cloth pads to keep my mind busy, since my Diva Cup just wasn't working with the m/c, I'm guessing because my cervix is in a weird position or something. So lots of browsing for patterns and such. I guess since it was so early for me, and I've already had a few others, I wasn't even that attached--I only knew I was pg for 4 days, and I spent those 4 days thinking I probably had a 50% chance of having another m/c. The really uspetting thing for me is that it's going to be even longer before I have another one, and my daughter is going to be even older. I wanted all my kids REALLY close together. Like, a year or less!

I'm sorry so many of us have to go through this. It really bugs me when I see teenagers with accidental pregnancies and I can't even have a baby for trying!