Bedtime dilemma

[oceanbaby]

Currently our bedtime routine for ds1 is to lay down, read books, and go to sleep. He has his own bed in our room. And for ds2 it is to lay down (in our bed), and nurse him to sleep. This works great when their bedtimes end up being vastly different, like when ds1 took a long nap and is up until 10pm but ds2 took an early nap and is ready for bed at 8pm.

But, the problem is when I try to put ds1 to bed while ds2 is still awake. If I go in the bedroom with just ds1 to read, ds2 goes nuts crying and pounding at the door, wanting in, no matter what dh tries to do to distract him. We of course have tried letting him come in with us to read books, but he doesn't lay down and read with us. He crawls all over our heads, pulls the book out of my hands, does belly flops onto my face, etc. Basically he sees this as prime wrestling time. And it doesn't matter if dh is the one in there putting ds1 to bed - ds2 still wants to be involved. And I would like him to be involved. I would love to lay in bed and read to both of them. But I can't seem to make that work. We've tried having dh sit with him on the floor next to us and let him play with books, but he just wants in bed with us, and then proceeds to beat us up.

So, any ideas on how to read to ds1 without ds2 going crazy, or how to incorporate ds2 into the bedtime reading without being so disruptive?

[Parker'smommy]

Is there anything "special" that you or dh can do with ds2 while ds1 is getting ready for bed. Obviously ds2 is still very young and doesn't understand how disruptive he is being, just that something is going on that he wants to be a part of and it bothers him to feel like he might be excluded, right? I'm not sure how you can make him understand that this isn't wrestling time except to be consistent that it isn't. But since redirection is usually the only that will work for a child ds2's age I would find something to distract him from making ds1's bedtime routine into something less than relaxing. Good luck finding that something :wink . I know I had to bring out some special toys when dd was first born when ds would use me nursing dd as his time to climb on us and bother dd while she was nursing. I know some families that have resorted to.....(gasp!!).... videos.....( double gasp) as a distraction for young children.....but you didn't hear that suggestion from me :thumb !

[Threefold]

Just quickly before I fall asleep here on MDC :LOL

For us (came age spread b/t kids) Dh has had ot take over the bedtime routine for ds 4y most nights. Or ds occupies himself while I help dd fall asleep. Can you dh take over for parts of ds1's rouine and then you join in? Can your dh take ds2 out for a walk?
HTH