mealtimes

[veganbaby]

Today at dinner, 13 month old DD started screaming because she wanted toast instead.
Here is the scenario:
I made split pea soup. DD doesn't want to eat it because she can't pick it up and eat it. So i offer her toast. DH doesn't want me to give it to her because he says I'm giving in to her. To me I think that she is still learning to eat and food shouldn't be an issue. But I take the toast away anyway. She starts screaming. We try to give her some soup. Still screams. So I give her toast but dip it in the soup. I tell her that she can have toast, but iwe have to put it in the soup so she can get the nutrients from it. DD stops crying and eats the toast with no further complaints. Even tries to drink the soup from the bowl afterwards.

Did I handle this right? Is this rewarding screaming? Am I giving in?

[canadiyank]

I think that is a good way to get the nutrients, by dipping! I don't think it's giving in at all. We try not to make an issue, but at times it's tough...when she turned three I started being a little more strict about food at mealtimes b/c I got very tired of her only snacking and refusing to even try meals. But that young I wouldn't worry about it...make a snack tray, try to get her to sample a bit, and talk with dh about your future expectations remembering that kids need like 9 exposures to a food. And that they have preferences, too! And if you're still bfing then she's getting plenty of nutrients so I wouldn't worry to much. Good luck!

[octobermom]

I think you did fine. My DD is just about to turn three she still wont touch soup because of her apraxia. Us forcing her to eat what confuses her wont solve a darn thing. You didn't give in you gave an age appropiate solution.

Deanna

[UnschoolnMa]

I would have just given her the toast without any conditions on it. She wants toast :shrug. She's just a baby yet, and food is probably still a reasonably new adventure. She probably doesn't understand anything about nutrients or why she can have toast some other time but not right now, at dinner, unless it's dipped in soup that she doesn't want to eat.

I disagree with your Dh that you are in "giving in" to her because that implies that she is doing something wrong or somehow being manipulative by crying/asking for toast. Depending on how verbal she is or isn't crying is a pretty big means of commuicating her wants and needs to you. Her want was toast. ;) In short I would just give her some soup and toast (or whatever) and let her have at it and eat what she wants to.

[fly-mom]

I think you did good. As far as your DH goes, maybe discuss with him why you don't think it's any kind of big deal to give in to her on this point. But also, to prevent this situation in the future, maybe try to include a few (nutritious) things with the meal that you know she will like. What I try to do when introducing a new food is to make sure that there are some old tried and true things on the table. That way, it doesn't even really become an issue. There's no pressure to eat a certain thing, but there's plenty of opportunity to try. DH can't complain that you are giving in to her then, because these things were always on the "menu" to begin with.

[mamabohl]

I would have just given her the toast without any conditions on it. She wants toast :shrug. She's just a baby yet, and food is probably still a reasonably new adventure. She probably doesn't understand anything about nutrients or why she can have toast some other time but not right now, at dinner, unless it's dipped in soup that she doesn't want to eat.

I disagree with your Dh that you are in "giving in" to her because that implies that she is doing something wrong or somehow being manipulative by crying/asking for toast. Depending on how verbal she is or isn't crying is a pretty big means of commuicating her wants and needs to you. Her want was toast. ;) In short I would just give her some soup and toast (or whatever) and let her have at it and eat what she wants to.


:yeah:

Since I've stopped insisting anything about food mealtimes have gotten so much easier with my ds.

[veganbaby]

Thanks for your posts. I realize that she doesn't understand nutrients. I knew that she wasn't refusing the soup because she didn't like it. She has had it before. She was refuisng the soup because she wanted to feed herself. So I figured to dip the toast in the soup so that she can get some veggies in. I was just telling her what I was doing just to talk to her. Not really setting a condition for her because I was sure she would eat it. Had she refused the toast with the soup with it I would have given her more toast without soup.
In the future, I will try to offer more finger foods. In the past, we had no trouble feeding her. But now she is wanting to be more indepedent.

Today I let her dip her toast in the left over soup and she just loved it!
And tonight at dinner I just mae her a plate of food that is healthy. No complaints from her.

[fly-mom]

Today I let her dip her toast in the left over soup and she just loved it!
And tonight at dinner I just mae her a plate of food that is healthy. No complaints from her.

Oh my yes. Don't toddlers just LOVE to dip things? This was an amazing revelation to me :) It's amazing the things you can get them to at least try as long as you give them something to dip!