Cesarean Birth Support Thread January & February 2006

[wombatclay]

Cesarean Birth Support Thread January & February 2006

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Heyla all!

Since we seem to be picking back up after the holidays I thought it might be nice to update the thread!

As always, this thread is for support only and is for all who want to give support to women who have had cesarean births or planning cesarean births for whatever reason. This is not a thread on whether or not cesareans are necessary, etc.

That said...it's been 9.5 months since my c/s and I've still got some aches and pains. Anyone know of some gentle yoga or general stretching moves that could help? I'm thinking I've probably got some adhesions on the right side of the incision (the left feels fine and you can hardly see the scar, the right side though is tight and a bit painful and the scar is very "ropy").

Also...any ideas about herbal supplements to try that might aid healing? My dh and I are starting to think about ttc and I'm hoping for a VBAC when the time comes so I'm looking for good uterine healing ideas!

good luck and swift healing to us all!

[AnditheBee]

That said...it's been 9.5 months since my c/s and I've still got some aches and pains. Anyone know of some gentle yoga or general stretching moves that could help? I'm thinking I've probably got some adhesions on the right side of the incision (the left feels fine and you can hardly see the scar, the right side though is tight and a bit painful and the scar is very "ropy").

Isn't it weird how the left & right sides can be so different? I still very occasionally feel a twinge from the left end of my scar, but never from any other part...anyhoo...

The two books I have* make the following recommendations for general abdomenal health and healing:
-seated forward-bend poses are a good start, especially the bound-angle pose with a forward bend (the "woman's pose"), child's pose, and wide-leg stretch with forward bend (which can be done while resting your folded arms on the seat of a chair, if you wish)
-gentle seated twisting poses
-abdomen-strengthening poses like the bridge or any curl-ups
-standing poses like side-angle, triangle, half-moon, and tree pose (which can be done against the wall)
-lying poses with your legs up a wall, like reclining wide-leg and reclining bound angle
-inverted and shoulder-stand poses like the plough and shoulder-stand (with legs to wall)
-and of course downward-facing dog is just one of those great, do-it-all kind of poses that help with everything. :)

Look for pictures of these poses here (http://www.yogabasics.com/asana/), if any of my terminology is confusing! These can actually be started (gently) as early as six-weeks post-surgery, so long as one's doctor okays it. And of course, don't do anything that hurts or seems too difficult. It is certainly possible to do "partial" poses until you increase flexibility--you should work toward not only more flexibility but holding the poses for longer periods of time.

*The books I have are Yoga for Pregnancy by Sandra Jordan and The Woman's Book of Yoga & Health by Linda Sparrowe and Patricia Walden. It is, of course, best to do these things in a class setting with a good teacher, but since that isn't always possible...thank goodness for books!

[mamabeth]

Hi there, glad to see a new thread!

I'm a little over 3 mos pp with c/s #2 and feeling good. I get some twinges when I'm running, but nothing serious. I am wondering about diastasis though..are they worse with c/s? Mine is terrible this time around.

no idea on the herbs...let me know though! :)

thanks...hope all of you are well.

[wombatclay]

I am wondering about diastasis though..are they worse with c/s?

I don't know, but I'd imagine the additional trauma to the ab muscles from the c/s probably can't help. I've just started doing the exercises in the (really awfully named) "Lose Your Mummy Tummy" which are aimed at closing the diastasis and they seem to be helping. I'm not sure though, and I'm not sure if the exercises are contributing to my incision pain. :(

Isn't it weird how the left & right sides can be so different?

It is soooooo odd. I mean, the left side of my incision is practically invisible and when I rub my fingers over it there's nothing out of the ordinary. On the right side however I have a large-ish numb spot (perhaps an inch "tall" by three inches "wide"), the scar is raised and "ropy", and there is a very obvious lump under the skin that follows the incision line for a few inches. And I really only get the twinges, aches, and odd sensations along that portion of the scar. Why oh why couldn't it be like the left side! :)

I've been doing scar massage off and on...I guess I need to be more serious about it and do it every day like they recommend.

Thanks for the stretches btw...I'll give them a try!

[alisaterry]

NAK

I'm 2-1/2 mo post c/s and I feel pretty good. I don't know about any specific herbs but I rub aloe vera gel into the incision every day. Back at my two week check-up, the nurse said my incision looks fantastic and she'll have to start recommending the aloe.

What bothers me is the lack of sensation in the skin around it. Some people say it returns in a year or so, but both my sisters say theirs never has. Grrrr.

[ozzyemm]

Hi. I had an emergency c-section last month. Physically, my body is nearly healed. Emotionally, I am having a hard time. I had gen. anesth., so I was unconscious for the birth of my son. This has been very hard on me. I don't know what Michael looked like when he wasborn, whether he cried or not. I don't even know hat his apgars were (not really good, since he was taken to NICU). Neither my husband nor my doula were allowed in the OR, so noone an give me this info. I feel guilty sometimes that I "wasn't there" for Michael's birth. He is a very beautiful boy, and brings me joy daily; we just had a rough start that I am still recovering from.

[wombatclay]

:hug to you ozzyemm...I'm so sorry you had such a rough time. Sometimes it's just so hard to make the doctor's involved in a c/s realize that they're dealing with someone's birth, rather than just another procedure to do before they go home.

Although they probably wont tell you anything "personal" about your son's birth, ask your doctor (or your son's ped) to help you get your hospital records. That way you'll at least know his apgars and have an idea of what he did/how he looked (though it will obviously be a more "clinical" story than your dh or doula might have told). Sometimes your records can help emotionally as well since if your c/s really was medically necessary it can be reassuring to know that (for some women, at least).

I'm glad you're recovering physically, but give yourself time to grieve for the birth you didn't have and to come to terms with the birth you did have. It can take a while...I know I'm still upset by my c/s.

Congrats on your little one though...it sounds like both of you are real fighters. :)

[greenmansions]

NAK

What bothers me is the lack of sensation in the skin around it. Some people say it returns in a year or so, but both my sisters say theirs never has. Grrrr.

I have recovered the sensation around the incision - I realized it sometime over the past several months so I am not sure exactly when it happened. I know that when we were TTC earlier in 2005 I still had numbness, and that was around the one year mark after my c/s. I will have to ask my sister who has had 2 c/s how she feels now - her youngest kids, twins, are now almost 7.

The wierd thing I get sometimes is odd prickly heat feelings there, kind of irritating. But then I dust the area with cornstarch and it takes care of it. Also don't much like bikini underwear anymore, prefer not have anything rubbing the scar area.

Mine healed very nicely tho; it's a small, very even scar. My dad is a surgeon and gave it the thumbs up too! :lol I hope if end up in another c/s that part is as good. I guess maybe that is one of the benefits of having my first c/s in the hospital here with the highest c/s rate... I will now be at the place with the lowest so it will be interesting to compare if it comes to that.

[eilonwy]

Everyone I asked told me that I might be numb around my incision forever, but I recovered all sensation in about 6 months, iirc. :shrug It's different for everyone.

I've been doing some of the spinningbabies things (holy moly, that's hard!) and I think (:fingersx:) that BellyBean turned :down last night. I felt her go transverse before I went to sleep, and did my best to keep my butt in the air as I fell asleep, but I was too tired to do much more. Anyway, this morning I'm pretty sure that I'm only feeling hands at the bottom. :thumb She hasn't kicked yet, but she will soon since she's awake and I'll know for sure then (I can't lean back and feel around, because the kids will pounce on me :down). Anyway, this is a good thing. :thumb I'm excited! :lol

[gilleygirl]

I had my section 2 years ago in feb and still do not have any feeling around my incision. i also had a horrible experience but my daughter was well worth it. I am new are you pregnant now or just delivered.

[turtlewomyn]

How do you all deal with insensitive things that people say? I got a card from my Mom's best friend (I don't particularily like this woman, although she is fond of me). The card was for DD and had some money, but she put in a sticky note that said something along the lines of "I am glad you had a c-section for your large baby because I had a large baby 40+ years ago and I still feel the effects. My daughter had two c-sections." I know that my mom recently saw this woman because my mom had told me not to feel bad about my c-section because her daughter had two and I am no longer discussing my feelings with my mom (but am going to find a professional for help and am attending ICAN meetings). Oddly enough, the friend has a PhD in psychology, apparently she doesn't specialize in post partum issues though.
So do I ignore or confront or write her a letter expressing my feelings and toss/burn it?

Elionwy - I hope bellybean keeps her head down!

Oh another thing, I am either coming down with the flu or mastitis, and the incision (almost 4 months old) really aches today, do people find that it hurts more when you are sick?

[AnditheBee]

Turtlewomyn, I'd suggest the toss & burn approach. People like that won't change their views even if you do speak your mind to them. Just let it roll off--her uninformed opinion does not matter, and if you don't feel close to her, her "support" should not matter either. Hugs to you.

[wombatclay]

I'd do the "write and toss" approach too. It's really important for you to get out everything you need to say, and how this sort of comment makes you feel, but it probably wouldn't educate this friend or change her mind about c/s. Maybe, since she has a degree in psych, at some point you could casually mention to her some of the studies available through ICAN or Mothering about the emotional/psychological damage of a c/s? Sort of say..."gee, I read this on ICAN and wondered what you think about it?". Just to help educate her about the situation.

It might help to remember that 40 years ago the birth environment/culture was A LOT different than it is now and her remembrances of her birth are probably playing a big role in how she sees birth now. (my mom had a hysterecomy five years ago as a result of a "bungled" delivery with my 10+ pound brother 24 years ago that damaged her uterus and one of her first comments about my c/s was "thank god"... so I totally understand how hurtful this sort of comment can be!)

Not that that excuses how she made you feel! But she probably saw her comment as supportive...and perhaps it's a comment that her own daughter responded well to after her own c/s. I dunno...c/s seems to be one of those topics where no one knows what to say and where the stock responses (like "at least you have a healthy baby!") just aren't terribly helpful to an nfl/ap mama.

I'm so sorry this woman brought you down like this! Hope the flu bug passes you by...but yeah, my incision hurts a bit when I'm really tired (I think the muscles in that area are a bit weaker now and tire more rapidly) so a cold could certainly have a similar affect.

[CaraboosMama]

Hi! just listening in...I found out @ my 20 week ultrasound that I may have vasa previa (and I do have a bilobed placenta) so I will most likely have a c-section @35 - 36 weeks. I don't know much about c-sections or how the recovery will differ from my vaginal birth so... :notes:


Kate

[mamabeth]

yes, mine aches when I have the beginnings of an mastitis or an infection too, or when I'm just really run down.

aren't those comments the worst? that's why I hate having to say I had a c/s, and now two :( . most people just don't get it, and won't. and that's okay...that's what MDC is for and friends IRL who know what you went through. anyway, I've so been there and I'm sorry. :hug

[ruby slippers]

Hello, I am almost one year post c-section and now ttc #2. I will try for a VBAC. I never thought I'd need a section and i did all the "thinking woman's stuff' to avoid it, but it still happened. I think even if I'd gone off alone in the woods to birth I would still have found my way into the OR! On the bright side, physically, the recovery from my section was easy. Dealing with the crappy comments is hard. I've had people tell me how lucky i am, how they wished they had a section, how now I will ALWAYS need a section, TRIAL of labor pisses me off too :blah :blah
If I get pregnant again I will do all the thinking woman's stuff again and plan what I'll do if I am back in the OR....

[mamabeth]

turtlewomyn--I remembered something that might be helpful or not...but my stepdad's mom and I (she is 88) were talking about birth and she had 2 ten-pounders vaginally and is still traumatized (her "kids" are 57 and 55). Apparently they could not repair tears very well and of course she birthed laying down in stirrups :( . She has said that she would have been glad for surgery because it was so horrible what she went through. Okay, that's *totally* not to say that c-sections are great or even would have been justified, but I can see her point...maybe your mom's friend went through something similar and was remembering it. Maybe not but it really helped me to know that older people who say stuff like that are just mourning their traumatic births too sometimes.

[Brookesmom]

:bump:

I'm about 1 1/2 weeks post c-section now (for my breech baby). We tried and external version but it was unsuccessful. DS' heart rate remained good but I told the OB's to stop after a few tries- I decided it wasn't worth the risk if he wasn't going to flip fairly easily.

I'm disappointed because I know that frank breech deliveries are possible, but knowing that my OB had never done one herself, I knew that c-section was probably much a safer option in my case. I never had considered that when I chose a doctor... My first delivery was fairly uneventful and I thought this one would be even easier...

Anyways, there were no complications and I'm doing pretty well. Anyone else less than a month or so post c-section? I"m wondering when I can start tightening my abs a bit and when these stubborn steri-strips will start to come off! They are taped on pretty strongly over my sutures and I don't want to pull on them. My OB said to look for changes in the stitches/redness, but I can't see anything under all that tape.

I'm getting stronger every day but still really tired... I am so lucky to have the in-laws here for a few weeks helping out with the house and my toddler for now... And nursing is going really well. It's still hard to believe that I had a c-section though. I had never envisioned that. Having DS here and healthy has really helped me not to dwell on it too much though. I was really upset when I found out I was going to need one if he remained breech and really scared about complications. It's so good to have that behind me and begin healing...

--Kelly

[wombatclay]

I'm sorry your little one didn't flip, but glad your sugery went so well! I feel like I've been recommending these two books a lot recently, but Bounce Back after the Baby and Lose Your Mummy Tummy both have sections on c/s recovery, exercises that are designed for the c/s mama, and directions on scar massage after c/s (to prevent adhesions or break them up if formed).

I know what you mean about the steri strips though! My doctor told me to "just pull them off when you're ready" and I couldn't believe it! After a few weeks I decided to bite the bullet and started easing them off in the shower (I put a little olive oil on them and then started geeeeeeeennnnnnnntly rubbing at the corners). I found that sort of rolling them off sideways instead of pulling them off from the bottom up (or the top down) was the way to go. That said, I almost passed out...it didn't hurt but I was so psyched up the adrenaline was really flowing and I got completely woozy and dizzy. So if you're like me and something of a wuss when it comes to potential pain (actual pain doesn't bug me...it's the "maybe" pains that get me) you might want to inform someone that your'e about to remove the steri strips.

But it really didn't hurt!

You said the steri strips are over your sutures? I had staples that were removed before I left the hospital so they put the steri strips over the incision to help prevent adhesions. If you do have sutures that need to be removed by the doc then they could probably remove the strips for you then. If the sutures are the kind that break off on their own though I recommend a glass of something soothing (with the promise of chocolate after), a hot shower, and a little olive oil. :)

Congratulations on your brand new little one!

[eilonwy]

:guilty I'm starting to get worried. BellyBean has turned several times, but she seems to be spending most of her time breech/transverse. :yikes: Is it ever, in any way, possible to deliver a baby vaginally when they're transverse at the onset of labor?

[OnTheFence]

:guilty I'm starting to get worried. BellyBean has turned several times, but she seems to be spending most of her time breech/transverse. :yikes: Is it ever, in any way, possible to deliver a baby vaginally when they're transverse at the onset of labor?

Hmmm, not sure, but I don't believe so -- especially if your water has broken. At that point risks of prolapse cord and other cord injuries can occur.

I've never actually known anyone personally go into labor with a transverse baby, breech but not lying side to side.

Kim

[Brookesmom]

My SIL went into labor with baby#2 being transverse, and she would not (obviously) descend, and there was worry that the cord was going to prolapse so she had a c-section. She said that it's very rare though. Her OB said it only happened about 1/2 of 1 percent of the time.

--Kelly

[Brookesmom]

Wombatclay, Thanks for the advice and congrats. I'm definitely going to look into those 2 books ASAP. Maybe I'll get lucky and the library will have one or both. I have dissolving stitches under my steristrips... Oil and some warm water sounds like a good idea --once they're a bit looser though LOL.

--Kelly

[nepenthesea]

:bump:
Anyways, there were no complications and I'm doing pretty well. Anyone else less than a month or so post c-section? I"m wondering when I can start tightening my abs a bit and when these stubborn steri-strips will start to come off! They are taped on pretty strongly over my sutures and I don't want to pull on them. My OB said to look for changes in the stitches/redness, but I can't see anything under all that tape.

I'm getting stronger every day but still really tired... I am so lucky to have the in-laws here for a few weeks helping out with the house and my toddler for now... And nursing is going really well. It's still hard to believe that I had a c-section though. I had never envisioned that. Having DS here and healthy has really helped me not to dwell on it too much though. I was really upset when I found out I was going to need one if he remained breech and really scared about complications. It's so good to have that behind me and begin healing...

--Kelly

I just had a c-section one moth ago tommorrow. I want to start working on my abs, too! I have been healing really well. The nurses had to remind me to take my pain meds, and I started moving around quickly. But it did hurt, and it was hard to deal with the first week or so. I would never actually wish that my babies were in the NICU, but I told my husband that I couldn't imagine trying to take care of both babies while healing from the surgery.

I can't believe I had a c-section, either. Especially since the first baby was born vaginally. The second baby wasn't in distress, but she wouldn't come out, either. We waited for six hours and tried different things, but she wouldn't budge. I have always been terrified of having a c-section, but I started to feel like she needed to come out. I feel bad, because I know that twins are sometimes born days apart, and maybe we should have just left her in there. I don't know.

I'm glad to have found this thread. Too bad we don't have a forum to ourselves.

[Vasmommy]

This may be a silly question, but is it possible to come to terms with having a cesarean if there's little you can plan for?

It's a bit premature for me to be assuming I'll have to have a cesarean, but if current issues don't resolve themselves, I've got good enough odds that any cesarean I have will be an "emergency" one, and that I could be dealing with a premie. Odds are also good enough that I'll make it to a planned C/S date of 37 weeks {my gut's telling me that won't happen though :(}.

I just can't imagine having a C/S. What I've read about the procedure freaks me out to no end. Sooooo dehumanizing, and I don't see a good way around that. Chances of me completely losing it on the operating table = very good. The funny thing is, even in my non-hospital births, it didn't cross my mind for a second that anything bad would happen. I assumed it'd all go well, and it did.

What can I do for myself emotionally to prepare for this? Do they let you take tours of the hospital/NICU where they'd explain the process or anything? How much time does a doc really take with you to explain the C/S procedure? I'd be transferred to a perinatalogist soon if this doesn't resolve; I have this perception of them being all strictly business, no bedside manner. True? False?

[mamabeth]

vasmommy--totally depends on the doc. I saw 2 and one was patronizing and horrible, and the other (who did the c/s) was great and accommodated all our requests (tell us what's happening during the birth, no woozy meds, see the baby right away, babe on my chest, etc.). he also took time to talk to us about it at an appt the day before. so be picky, if you can.

[wombatclay]

What can I do for myself emotionally to prepare for this? Do they let you take tours of the hospital/NICU where they'd explain the process or anything? How much time does a doc really take with you to explain the C/S procedure? I'd be transferred to a perinatalogist soon if this doesn't resolve; I have this perception of them being all strictly business, no bedside manner.

Some hospitals have special classes/tours for mamas who may need a c/s or who might be spending some time with a little one in the NICU. Even if your hospital doesn't have a specific tour, call the Labor/Delivery ward and ask what they can do for you. Many times the nurses on that ward are overworked but VERY caring people and they will do what they can to help you prepare...

It is a scary process, and even scarier when you know your little one might be in distress, so learning as much as possible might help. There is a sticky at the top of this forum that has information about cesarean recovery and planning from a natural family living perspective, so check out the links given there.

Although I don't agree with some of their assumptions, a book like "Cesarean section: understanding and celebrating your baby’s birth" by Caroline de Costa might help, and the "Birthing from Within" book can help to with the emotional side of c/s. Check out the information on the ICAN website or in Ina May's Childbirth Guide about VBACs so you'll know what sorts of sutures/incisions/etc you'll need to maximize a future vbac.

Line up a lot of support for after the baby arrives, write a birth plan that sets out what you need for the c/s to be as healthy and loving as possible, start writing your fears or concerns out in a journal or meditating on the birth to prepare emotionally, read through all these cesarean threads for ideas and support, and hang in there!

[Vasmommy]

Thanks! I checked out the links in the stickied thread last night. The UK one was good, but I wasn't sure how much of that applied to the U.S. hospital experience.

I don't think I get much of a say in incision types. Most of what I read says with placenta previa they favor a classical incision to avoid cutting along the placenta. This is my last birth anyway, so no matter to me. Well, not true. I mean I still want as easy/safe a process as possible.....but if I end up with complications or a hysterectomy it won't be as devastating as it would be to someone who had wanted more children yet, kwim?

Oh -- another question. I was reading about having a doula for a C/S. My MW has offerred to doula for me in the event I have to transfer out of her care, but I didn't (well, I still don't) understand what she would do? I'll have my mom and my dh there for support. My dad will probably watch the other kids either at the hospital or at home. Would my MW maybe know more about the whole C/S process that she'd be an asset in that way?

Mamabeth, I fear I won't have time to be choosy about docs. If I don't end up on hospital bedrest, I can probably test a few out. But if I'm stuck in the hospital, I fear I'm pretty much at the mercy of whoever I already have lined up or whoever's on call. Then again, the OB I'm seeing now is pro-homebirth so hopingly he'd match me with a perinatalogist which leans more my way......if such a thing exists.

[Nosy]

Vasmommy, I think having your midwife as a doula is a good idea. My mw stayed with me for my c-section, and it made me feel safer that there was someone with me during the section that "knew" what was supposed to be happening and watching, in contrast to DH & me, who were more emotionally involved and unknowledgeable about medical procedures.

I had a c-section almost 6 weeks ago after a vaginal birth and wish that I had been more prepared. I think the links on the sticky post are about as good as any book I've read. I do wish I'd read Silent Knife beforehand. I have also read The Essential C-Section Guide, but I didn't think it really gave any new information.

I also wish I'd made a c-section birth plan..I wish I'd made arrangements to have more pictures made and to keep the placenta...anything to make the birth feel more natural. I read that you can even delay cord clamping, but I guess you would have to have a very cooperative ob for that. Hope everything works out, and I think you're smart to prepare now.

[OnTheFence]

This may be a silly question, but is it possible to come to terms with having a cesarean if there's little you can plan for?

It's a bit premature for me to be assuming I'll have to have a cesarean, but if current issues don't resolve themselves, I've got good enough odds that any cesarean I have will be an "emergency" one, and that I could be dealing with a premie. Odds are also good enough that I'll make it to a planned C/S date of 37 weeks {my gut's telling me that won't happen though :(}.

I just can't imagine having a C/S. What I've read about the procedure freaks me out to no end. Sooooo dehumanizing, and I don't see a good way around that. Chances of me completely losing it on the operating table = very good. The funny thing is, even in my non-hospital births, it didn't cross my mind for a second that anything bad would happen. I assumed it'd all go well, and it did.

What can I do for myself emotionally to prepare for this? Do they let you take tours of the hospital/NICU where they'd explain the process or anything? How much time does a doc really take with you to explain the C/S procedure? I'd be transferred to a perinatalogist soon if this doesn't resolve; I have this perception of them being all strictly business, no bedside manner. True? False?

I really think you should make arrangements to take a tour and ask to see an OR. Talk to the lactation specialist before hand and also ask to see the NICU. Since you are at risk of having a preemie or a baby with problems, they are likely to accomadate you.
My first csection was an emergency. I was very unprepared and had read nothing but how awful they were. I did have a horrific experience but my last two cesareans were not. (my birthplan is in the above pinned thread) I took the time with my two OBs to discuss the c/s procedures and how long it took each of them to do them. I also wanted to discuss closure/repair of the incision and pain relief options. Definitely discuss these things BEFORE they happen. Also type them up and carry them with you in your hospital bag, giving a copy to your doctor and husband as well.
Some peri's are great, but many think they are little gods. If you have a sick baby, you often have to look over their attitudes. Don't feel intimidated and don't let them "rush" you.
You can make a cesarean birth a good one, but it will take a special doctor and an open mind and heart to often achieve them. In the case of an emergency though, unfortunately many things are left out of our control. You most likely be put under GA. If that is the case, discuss your recovery period and what will happen with your husband and doctor before hand.

[wombatclay]

A c/s for previa is going to be a little different from other c/s simply because of the location of the placenta and the risk for maternal bleeding...so they probably wont be able to delay cord clamping. Even though they may need to do a classical incision, you could ask about the possibility of a "low-ish"/"medium high" tranverse incision just to see if they could compromise without endangering the baby. And still request that the uterus be double sutured...even if you're not planning more children, some research shows that the double layer suture heals more tightly and with less chance of binding to other organs.

In the hospital where I delivered a woman who has a vaginal delivery can keep her placenta, but a woman with a surgical delivery can't...it has to do with their medical insurance (with a surgical delivery the placenta is considered a "surgical byproduct" and so can't be released to the patient...just like they wont give wisdom teeth to patients who need to have those removed in the hospital). So if that is something you feel strongly about you might need to start working now to arrange that.

A doula could be helpful, but it depends again on hospital policy. Some hospitals allow you to have two support people, some hospitals allow one person with you at all times (so a doula could stay with you while your dh went with the baby while you're being stitched), and other hospitals allow one person TOTAL. If your hospital has a policy like the last one, ask for a nurse to stay with you after your dh has left with the baby.

Oh, and I haven't read it, but Michel Odent (who popularized birth pools) has a book out called "Caesarean" that some of my friends "enjoyed".

[BookGoddess]

This may be a silly question, but is it possible to come to terms with having a cesarean if there's little you can plan for?

It's a bit premature for me to be assuming I'll have to have a cesarean, but if current issues don't resolve themselves, I've got good enough odds that any cesarean I have will be an "emergency" one, and that I could be dealing with a premie. Odds are also good enough that I'll make it to a planned C/S date of 37 weeks {my gut's telling me that won't happen though :(}.

I just can't imagine having a C/S. What I've read about the procedure freaks me out to no end. Sooooo dehumanizing, and I don't see a good way around that. Chances of me completely losing it on the operating table = very good. The funny thing is, even in my non-hospital births, it didn't cross my mind for a second that anything bad would happen. I assumed it'd all go well, and it did.

What can I do for myself emotionally to prepare for this? Do they let you take tours of the hospital/NICU where they'd explain the process or anything? How much time does a doc really take with you to explain the C/S procedure? I'd be transferred to a perinatalogist soon if this doesn't resolve; I have this perception of them being all strictly business, no bedside manner. True? False?

I was induced at 37 weeks for blood pressure that just wouldn't come down. DD was a good size at 37 weeks but she had a rough start. She ended up spending 3 days in the NICU before rooming with me. We both left the hospital after 5 days.

I think you're smart to plan ahead for a possible C-section. I didn't even think that I would need one. I had a whole birth plan written but there wasn't anything in there for anything other than a vaginal birth. I'm a little irked with myself for not anticipating all the possibilities. I was so sure I would give birth the way most women do. Having a mw or doula at your side sounds great. Having someone knowledgeable about the procedure would have eased some of my fears. Again..I didn't think ahead.

We did a hospital tour at 34 weeks but our HMO doesn't allow people to see the operating room or the NICU. I don't know why they didn't let us see an empty operating room but we were told the NICU was off-limits because of confidentiality and I suspect fears of baby snatching. We sure got familiar with the NICU after DD was born though. :lol While my dream was to have a natural birth I don't feel too much angst over my C-section. After 3 hours of pushing it was clear DD wasn't going to be born the way I had anticipated. My doctors and nurses were great during my labor, C-section, and afterwards. I never felt dehumanized or less than a mother. DH was with me the whole time. I had very supportive nurses. Breast feeding was encouraged early and often. We got to spend a lot of time with DD. We could visit her in the NICU anytime we wanted those first 3 days. Nearly all our requests were accomodated. In fact, I wrote a letter to the nursing director at the hospital to let her know that she had some special nurses working there. She called me back and thanked me! lol

[eilonwy]

Our hospital had a virtual NICU tour available for women who were likely to have NICU babies; I didn't get to watch that video because I wasn't at high risk for a NICU baby at all... :shake I wish that I'd asked about it, though.

I can totally understand why they don't generally let people tour the NICU, though. There are confidentiality issues as well as health issues involved. Where I delivered, there was no intermediate care nursery (though I think they may have built one since) so everyone going into NICU had to go through all the precautions; the hard core hand scrubbing, wearing masks, no visitors with any signs of respiratory infection, only siblings under 12 who were fully vaccinated and no other visitors under 12 at all (this is still depressing for me, as ChibiChibi desperately wanted to see BeanBean and didn't find out until after she'd washed her hands that she wasn't allowed to :bawl :irked: ), etc, etc, and so forth. The number of visitors had to be limited, and voices and lights were kept down. They had to be very careful because there were some very tiny, very sick babies in there.

[zs25]

i was just thrilled to see the sticky natural family cesarean thread..
i have just started reading...and theres so much..
praise be to god, I AM THRILLED to get this kind of support just a week before my 3rd(elective)cesarean..
Going for cesarean had always been traumatic for me..
God willing.i hope this time it will be better..
As i have mentioned earlier my present dr had suggested a spinal for me..and i am seriously considering it..
i have read mostly positive views about it on the forum..
i have also asked two persons whom i know that have been through this.
One is my aunt,who has had both,g,a, and spinal.and in her experience both have been the same..
but i really do want to be in control this time, so i think ill give the spinal a try..
Can some one pls let me know how painful is the injection which they insert?
i am game for pain..as anyways there will be so much of it after the surgery.but still i want to be prepared for the pain of the spinal needle and how long will it take for the injection to be over with..
i would really appreciate a feed back..
thanks...a million..to everyone out here..

[kkiolbassa]

Can some one pls let me know how painful is the injection which they insert?
i am game for pain..as anyways there will be so much of it after the surgery.but still i want to be prepared for the pain of the spinal needle and how long will it take for the injection to be over with..
i would really appreciate a feed back..
thanks...a million..to everyone out here..

I had a spinal with my last birth. The injection wasn't very painful and it took effect really quickly. Mine was an emergency csection though, so they did everything really quickly. I'm not sure if that's typical or not.

I'm also very happy to see this thread. My youngest DD was born by emergency csection on Nov 30th at 35 weeks. I had preeclampsia. We tried an induction, but DD did not tolerate labor well. It turned out the cord was wrapped around her neck twice. DD also had IUGR and she was 3lbs 10oz and 17" at birth. She spent 10 days in the nicu/special care nursery.

She is doing really well now. She was up to 7lbs 9oz and 19" at her 6 week checkup. Also, it took 6 weeks, but she is finally exclusively breastfeeding. :)

[wombatclay]

Can some one pls let me know how painful is the injection which they insert?

I actually had two spinals...the first was to hopefully allow me to relax a bit and dilate further (I'd been at 7cm for more than 12 hours and they were getting a bit concerned). The second was on the table in the OR right before I lay down for the c/s (4 hours or so after the first spinal).

They use a small injection of novacaine or other numbing medicine first, so if you've ever had a novacaine injection at the dentist you have an idea of the sensation. A little "zingy", a sharp pinch, and then a sensation of warmth. Most of the time this is described as a "bee sting" but I didn't think it was that bad. The actual spinal injection didn't hurt for me either time....mostly an odd sensation of pressure. What WAS uncomfortable was having to bend over and arch my back and then stay totally still while the procedure was being done. Holding still whil having a contraction is NOT an amusing moment. I was squeezing dh's hand and I actually squeezed so hard during my "don't move" contraction" that I cut his hand! (the edge of his wedding ring cut his finger due to the pressure). That said, it took something like 5 minutes to do the first spinal from initial prep to finish and another 5 minutes for the pain relief to really kick in. The second time it took another 5 minutes to prep but they used a much larger dose and the reaction was immediate. Between getting the injection and swinging my legs onto the table I was numb from the rib cage down!

So at least for me, the worst bit is thinking about what the procedure entails and holding really really still. I didn't have any unusual side effects, no headaches or blood pressure problems, though my back was sore for about a week near the injection site and I did have a lot of shaking for about an hour after the second injection (though not after the first, so I don't know if it was the spinal that did it or the operation/adrenaline of birth)

But I've heard from both patients and doctors that the anesthesiologists at my hospital are amazing. So that might have something to do with it...

[zs25]

THANKS A million for the replies...

[alisaterry]

I just can't imagine having a C/S. What I've read about the procedure freaks me out to no end. Sooooo dehumanizing, and I don't see a good way around that. Chances of me completely losing it on the operating table = very good. The funny thing is, even in my non-hospital births, it didn't cross my mind for a second that anything bad would happen. I assumed it'd all go well, and it did. What can I do for myself emotionally to prepare for this? Do they let you take tours of the hospital/NICU where they'd explain the process or anything? How much time does a doc really take with you to explain the C/S procedure? I'd be transferred to a perinatalogist soon if this doesn't resolve; I have this perception of them being all strictly business, no bedside manner. True? False?

NAK
My C/s was an emergency transfer from a homebirth to the hospital in the middle of the night. I knew nothing about c-sections because I never imagined it would apply to me. The only thing I knew was that two of my sisters had them and they took a long time to recover. The night nurses were witchy and the on-call OB was a total jacka$$. They were condescending and reluctant to answer any questions. The epidural affected my lungs and no one would respond to me when I cried out that it hurt to breathe.

DH and I had to act quickly to maintain some control over the situation and keep our birth as sacred as it deserved to be. DH stayed holding my hand and stroking my forehead at all times. The snippy nurse tried to tell him that they preferred if he stepped back but he just glared at her. A team of wild horses couldn't have pulled him away from me.

Right before they wheeled me into the surgery room, DH insisted on a moment to give me a blessing. He anointed my head with a little oil, placed both hands on my head, and prayed such beautiful words of comfort. This grounded us both and gave us our power back.

My midwife was not allowed in the surgery but my DH stayed at my side. I was so exhausted from 20 hours of powerful, painful and unproductive labor, so I actually fell asleep during the procedure. The moment DS emerged, DH kissed my head and then clung to DS' side. He talked to him while they cleaned him up and made certain there was no eye ointment, no Vit K shot, and no Hep B nonsense. When they finally let DH hold him, he didn't lt go. He sang to him all the songs we sang while he was in utero and told him all about the world.

When I woke up, DH is the on who brought him to me, and I immediately took him out of the plastic bed and held him to my chest. At first he didn't seem like he belonged to me. I felt so lost because I had failed and had a C/S and I didn't see or feel my son born and now here was this stranger. But I felt him skin to skin and inhaled his smell and looked into his amazingly alert eyes and the connection grew. I breast fed and co-slept in my hospital bed and pretty soon the line between him and me was gone. Luckily, the regular day nurses were just amazing and supportive.

Ultimately, though, DH and I were in charge of our own experience, because we weren't going to get that from the hospital staff. A birth is an every day event for them - you must make it the miraculous spiritual experience that it is. Take time to say or read a prayer, pronounce a blessing on your baby when he or she is born, and insist on rooming in. A baby being born is a holy moment no matter how he or she emerges.

[Faithsmom]

Hi all... I don't want this to become long, so I'll try to be quick.
I had a C/s for dd in jan/04. I had spontaneous labor at term, was progressing well and got "stuck" at 7cm for 4+ hours. Hence the section.
I am currently pg, and am/was/might be planning a Vbac for this birth. Before yesterday I was so convinced that this was the way I wanted to go. I found the most friendly Vbac hospital, midwives and Ob practice in my area. They are very supportive.
Yesterday I met w/ the Ob for the first time (just in case it came down to a c/s I would have met him KWIM?) until then I was dealing w/ a midwife who is awesome btw.
Well, after he did my pelvic measurements, he basically said my pelvic bones are really narrow and that for a VBAC "the stars pretty much have to be alligned". He did not discourage me from trying, but he said if the baby is 8# or more (DD was 8# 12oz) where my pelvis becomes narrow would be about (I forget what station he said but it corresponds to the 6-7cm point in labor) where I stalled for DD. This guy only had my operation report. He would want me to go into labor around 37wks to ensure the baby wasn't too big to pass. This would mean stripping my membranes to try and help things along. I have to go for an ultrasound to get a weight on the baby as of right now. He said they would not "be heroic" during my labor and if I did stall they would C/s.
Here's the thing:
My previous Ob (after having DD) said that I could Vbac if my labor was early for my next pg (I asked about vbac at my 6wk check up :lol) otherwise he doesn't think it was going to happen. So, I got pg and basically said I'm going to Vbac and he said that because he's an Ob etc etc..... found midwife.....
During first pelvic exam, midwife says I have a narrow pelvis. Says during labor we'll have to be standing up during pushing and changing positions to get baby out. She also said that my pelvis is "not inadequate but narrow"...
Now, the ob basically said the same thing but we discussed it further in depth. There were no transfer of complete records between these people other than my operation report.

So here's the problem.....
If I have three people telling me that I am basically fighting an uphill battle here should I just avoid the emergency that it may become and plan a C/s? They ARE NOT pressuring me into a C/S AT ALL. They are very supportive of my Vbac and said they will work with me through it but are not going to be unrealistic. If anything they are very supportive. I would not be in such a quandry though if I had three doctors/ midwives telling me "oh yeah you have a great pelvis, you could birth an 11 lber through there." KWIM?
I just needed some support here from some non judgemental moms who have been there themselves. Allof this is actually helping me in coming to terms w/ dd's birth. I always felt that "if I had tried harder" etc etc....
BTW, for the mamas who have had 2 c/s... how do you keep a toddler from jumping on you after having a c/s without stressing that you are "hurt" surrounding the birth of their sibling. DD jumps and rolls all over me now. If I end up w/ a C/s that is not going to fly. I just don't want her to associate Birth with an injury KWIM? Any advice would be most helpful. Thanks so much mamas.

[Vasmommy]

I just wanted to thank everyone for the replies.

It's looking like my odds of having to use the info have decreased dramatically. I had a HUGE placenta move, not only clearing up the previa entirely but also putting me well out of any danger zone as far as postpartum hemorrage. That news was rather shocking but hey, I'll take it. :)

I'm sooooo relieved!!!! My homebirth is back on. Now I just have to get back into that mindset. I guess the plus to all this is that if something should go bad and I need a C/S for another reason, I'm more informed now than I've ever been before.

Thanks again!!

[crazyknitter]

I think I may be hanging out here for awhile. A post in the sept ddc (How will you birth your baby, page 2) has really REALLY upset me. As a pro homebirther, & natural birther, trained doula & LE that has to now have her children sugically, I need all the support I can get. I will meet with my OB on 2/13 for the first time since finding out I am pg again. At my pre-pg appt in october we discussed future pregnancies will be c-sec, probably at 39 weeks. (My dd died before birth last year.)
Anyway I want this to be as least traumatic & most supportive experience it can be. I will work out a birth plan so they know what I want & what to expect. I need a place where I feel I belong, not the bashing that is going on in the ddc. Thanks.

[eilonwy]

Faithsmom-- If I were in your position, I would see if I could plan a c-section after a trial of labor. From everything that I've read, having some labor before a c-section results in better outcomes for mom and for baby; even if, going into it, you know that you'll be unlikely to deliver vaginally if you're beyond 39 weeks, you can still go into labor and labor for however long before you have the c-section. It might make some planning a bit more difficult (making sure that the right OB is on call, etc) but you'll still get some of the "natural" experience (spontaneous labor) and maintain a degree of control over the entire experience. Perhaps you could plan to have a c-section after you get to 7 cm, or after X hours of labor if you're beyond 39 weeks, or something like that?

[Ben's Mommy]

Crazy knitter - :hug I'm so sorry there isn't much support in the DDC. I lurk here often and hope that if I need a repeat c-sec that I'll have support too. I'm currently debating between vbac and rep c-sec. It's a very hard choice, and I will most likely be going with the c-sec too. I just want my baby to live NO MATTER WHAT, and how he/she will be born doesn't really matter. LIFE DOES. Come here for support as often as you need. :Hug

[Faithsmom]

Eilonwy--- They said I can definately have a trial of labor if I want it. I have read about how labor "activates" certian things in both the baby and mother and all of the benefits. I just don't want it to become an emergency. KWIM? Esp. knowing I most likely will not deliver vaginally going into it. I just somehow want to feel like I am definately making the right decision. Though when it comes to pregnancy and birth uncertianty is a given.

[Heavenly]

Hi I am 2 weeks past c-section # 3. I was planning a VBAC but I developed hypertension at 35.5 weeks which quickly got worse and she had to be born at 36 weeks. They couldn't induce because I had already had 2 c-sections so she had to be born by c-section. I am actually surprisingly okay with it. I thought I would be devastated but I'm not. My first two were emergencies, everything was hectic and scary. With this one time was of the essence but we had a day's notice to process everything and come to grips with it. I knew she had to be born and that there was no other way so I am fine with it. It was actually a wonderful experience. The doctor was really nice and funny, my midwife and DH were in with me and there was a very celebratory atmosphere. They took me in and did my spinal which didn't really hurt. The scariest part for me is always that I can still feel my legs but I can't move them or feel pain. It freaks me out and I kept making them promise not to cut until I was sure I couldn't feel it. DH says I say this every time. Then DH and midwife came in and everything started. The anesthesiologist was joking around with me and DH saying he had any cocktail of drugs I might want and just let him know when to slip me some. I was nauseous so he gave me something in my IV but it didn't make me sleepy at all. I was really excited about the whole thing. There was a lot of tugging and pulling but no pain. I heard a loud cry and asked if the baby was out and they said, "Well the head is." She started crying with only her head out! Then they pulled her out and DH yelled its a girl! They had to take her immediately to the warming bed because she was premature but after a bit of oxygen she was fine so they brought her to me. She was still all covered in vernix which for some reason was important to me because I had never seen any of my babies like that. Then they had to take her to the nursery but I was fine with that because DH and midwife went with her. They stitched me up and then I went to the recovery room. Everyone was so nice and respectful and the doctor came to see me in the recovery room to congratulate us. They brought her to me to nurse but then had to go back to the nursery to supp a bit of formula with a cup feeder because her blood sugar was dangerously low. She was 8 lbs. 4 oz. at 36 weeks so they think I may have had gestational diabetes (I didn't take the test). Then I was taken to my room and she was put in bed with me and hasn't left my side since. All in all it was a really wonderful birth. I want people to know that a c-section birth can be beautiful and peaceful. I was up and around fairly quickly and went home 2.5 days after she was born. I've only taken motrin and tylenol for pain and I am pretty much back to normal except for a bit of muscle soreness in my tummy. I had staples and they were removed before I left the hospital and my steri strips came off on their own in the shower when I was soaping the area. I am almost 100% positive we are done having kids but in case we change our minds the doctor did say we would be fine to have another c-section. I would not attempt a VBA3C.

DH took some pictures of DD emerging during the c-section. They are not gory at all so if anyone who is planning a c-section or might need one wants to see them let me know.

[CaraboosMama]

I think I may be hanging out here for awhile. A post in the sept ddc (How will you birth your baby, page 2) has really REALLY upset me. As a pro homebirther, & natural birther, trained doula & LE that has to now have her children sugically, I need all the support I can get. I will meet with my OB on 2/13 for the first time since finding out I am pg again. At my pre-pg appt in october we discussed future pregnancies will be c-sec, probably at 39 weeks. (My dd died before birth last year.)
Anyway I want this to be as least traumatic & most supportive experience it can be. I will work out a birth plan so they know what I want & what to expect. I need a place where I feel I belong, not the bashing that is going on in the ddc. Thanks.

:hug
I am so sdrry to hear about the b!tchiness in your ddc. As wonderful as burth (any type of birth) is - it is only on small part of being a mother. I am disappointed that it looks like I may need a c/s (due to vasa previa) but I am thrilled that the technology is there to help me safely birth my child!!

On a side note to the mom who was asking about touring the OR, etc...on our tour of the birth center we are using (it is part of a full hospital - not a free standing bc) the nurse showed us the birth center OR - specifically for C/s and other complications - instead of a separate OR in another part of the hospital. That made me feel a little better. Plus, the nurse kept stressing how the best place for babies after birth was in their parents' arms & not in the nursery, bassinette, etc. I wanted to give her a hug:)

[radish]

New here too!

crazyknitter - I am so sorry for the terrible post and lack of accountability and compassion from the mamas in your DDC.

I am 26 weeks and gave been on the fence since the beginning. Although I think I am FINALLY leaning towards a C/S.

My hospital does do VBACs but the stats/numbers arent very "encouraging" (97 over the last 2 years??).

I can choose to deliver at UC Davis in Davis CA (which is a WONDERFUL/crunchy place) or have a VBAC option in a non-birth friendly hospital.....

I just printed 2 birth plan options and am excited to start work on my own.

Thanks for all of the links, support and information mamas. And it really sucks that there is so much anti-C/S crap here. I am so surprised that MDC mamas cannot see the difference between an informed C/S CHOICE and a statistic.

[eilonwy]

:eyesroll But if we had made truly informed choices, we would have done what they did, didn't you know? And there's no way that our babies' lives were actually in danger at any point (nor our own), and if they were it's only because we didn't do enough research/eat enough protien/whatever. It's my fault and nobody elses that my daughter turned breech and dropped her cord, and if I'd known all of the risks of having a c-section I never would have done it, I'd have tried to give birth to her vaginally instead and if God wanted her to live she would have, and if not I should have been ready to let her go. :cuss

Sorry, I'm just not in the mood for unsupportive, self-righteous folk right now. I'm in too much pain and I'm too hormonal to deal with that stuff. :ignore

[mamabeth]

congrats on your birth, heavenly! I'm glad it was peaceful and everyone was respectful of what you wanted. I felt exactly the same way about my 2nd c/s. Eliana is a beautiful name too!

sorry the ddcs aren't helpful. I consoled myself with the thought that this is the only place where there's pressure the "other" way, but it all comes down to informed choice, and mamas need to respect that we really DO have all the info, we're just not choosing to VBAC (VBA2C, HBAC, UC, etc).

[ncastro]

Hi everyone,

I am new to MDC. I'm due with #3 10/16/2006. My 1st ds was breech, and after a failed external version was born by c/s in March 2001. For our 2nd ds, we had a c/s after a failed "trial of labor" VBAC.

As much as I would LOVE to be okay with all this, I know I can't say I am, but I'm trying. Knowing with the politics of birthing these days, I know this one WILL be a c/s. So, I'm trying to get to where I need to be (does that make sense?). I don't want to feel yucky about this one too! I think, by preparing this early, I CAN be okay with it all. However, that is why I have found THIS thread! :)

My first ob appt (with a new practice) is March 16th. I'm going to take my time in telling them my desires/hopes as I don't want to give them the wrong idea about myself.

Any thoughts from you ladies about trying to schedule vs. going into labor first?!?!?

I'm already learning a lot from you all.

Thanks,
Natalie

[alisaterry]

Welcome! :hug

I've only had one baby so I can't give much advice as far as labor vs planned c/s is concerned, but I wanted to simply say that the emergence of a baby is sacred and beautiful no matter how it is done. Having a c-section does not diminish the special nature of birth. You are a wonderful person for being willing to put yourself through a major surgery to help your baby enter the world. Don't let anyone tell you differently!

[ncastro]

Thanks! Really, my issues with my c/s are not from what anyone else has said. I do agree that having the healthly baby is the most important... my issues are more with a baby's start into the world and how that affects things (breastfeeding, adjustments, bonding, etc). I know I also have major issues with healthcare providers ATTITUDES towards how we birth, etc. But I'm not going there! :)

I do so appreciate your sweet message!
Natalie

[ncastro]

Anyway I want this to be as least traumatic & most supportive experience it can be. I will work out a birth plan so they know what I want & what to expect. I need a place where I feel I belong, not the bashing that is going on in the ddc. Thanks.

Crazyknitter, first of all, I'm so sorry about your dd. I truly cannot imagine. But I wanted to tell you that since we're due around the same time and we both are looking for similar things, that we're on the same page! Good luck to us both! ;-)

Natalie

[alisaterry]

I know I also have major issues with healthcare providers ATTITUDES towards how we birth, etc. But I'm not going there! :)
Natalie

I was an emergency transport from a homebirth and the o/b on call who did the c/s was a jacka$$. I know we're not supposed to name-call in the forums but since I haven't said who he is, I hope I'm OK. Though IRL I tell everyone to avoid him like the plague. He was just downright mean to me, my DH and my midwife. So my DH and I had to do what we could ourselves to still make it a meaningful experience. And, we had to argue a lot to keep them from giving DS shots and eye ointment and keep him in the room with us and get the nurses to stop giving DS a pacifier and formula. :fence:

My only consolation is that I know the c/s was necessary. Do I sound bitter? I think I may still be bitter. Hmmm....

The best advice I ever got was to remember bonding can still be complete after times of separation. Adopted children can become just as attached, so obviously a bad or non-existent beginning can be overcome.

Keep us all updated on how your pregnancy progresses.

[martinshockeymom]

hello all - what a wonderful and supportive thread! i looked at it a little bit during my pregnancy, once i found out my dd was breech and i would most likely need a c-section. we tried some tips, but decided against trying the version. so, i just resolved myself to the c-section and felt pretty good about it, though completely terrified of the recovery.....well here i am 6 days after the birth and pain/ recovery wise i feel pretty good. not a lot of pain, just some muscle soreness and difficulty moving around......unfortunately i was prepared for the pain, i was not prepared for these emotions....i thought i was totally prepared, honestly, i know it is frowned on here at MDC, but i am an epidural girl - so i thought - hey this shouldn't be that bad, no labor, a spinal, so i will be awake, quick procedure and then i get my baby girl.......but here i am 6 days later mourning that i did not get a vaginal birth......i know my hormones are bouncing off the wall so nothing is in perspective and i know the most important part is that she is here and healthy, but i had no idea how much i would miss the fact that i did not go into labor and deliver her - it just doesnt feel like i gave birth - it feels like i had surgery that has left me kinda sore and not able to move too well and got a baby too.....i am sure in a few weeks when my hormones are all better that i will not really care any more as i watch her thrive and grow - but right now it seems so important. and the procedure went well - the spinal was not great and they screwed up my IV, but my ds was able to see his new baby in the recovery room and they were tandem nursing within hours of her birth. she is doing well - just now starting to nurse well though which is hard on me coz my 3 1/2 old still nurses and has been a nursing champ since the first minute, so to see her struggle to latch and not stay on very long is hard on me and she is not pooping enough.....and i just wonder, maybe we took her out too early...it was only a few days before my due date, but i can imagine that in utero every minute matters - anyway, i know i am rambling...i am just happy to find support here - anyone have tips on what to do and not do in the next couple weeks of recovery - though my OB is great and the hospital we were at was wonderful (ds and dh stayed with me and baby the whole time, they welcome the siblings, didnt care that he still nursed and were very pro-breastfeeding) our discharge nurse was terrible and the only instruction she gave me was no heavy lifting for 6 weeks - thats it......thanks for the thread and thanks for any advice!

[wombatclay]

Congratulations on your newest little one (no matter how she arrived)!

You're right that at 6 days post partum your hormones are still doing the crazy dance...but don't discount your feelings about your birth! You've been through major surgery, you're takingcare of a new addition as well as your older dc, and it's totally normal to be second guessing and monday morning quarterbacking your decisions. Give yourself time to heal and process the experience!

You might want to check out the resources in the Natural Family Living c/s sticky (http://www.mothering.com/discussions/showthread.php?t=401645) to get a good idea about recovering from a c/s (physical, emotional, spiritual, etc). Recovering from a c/s is more work than the folks at the hospital seem to realize, and it takes time. It's different for everyone, but take the time to heal...even if you feel fine in a few weeks don't try to do too much too soon!

Congrats again!