Baby-brain or just lazy, I'm flunking school...

[Snowdrift]

Ladies, I'm so at my wit's end. I cannot focus on school. I'm in law school, should be second year but am taking some first year classes still because morning sickness made me cut down last term.

I can't focus on *anything*. I literally would rather wash dishes or do laundry than study (I *hate* dishes and laundry), simply because i can daydream about the baby while doing dishes or folding towels.

It's so frustrating!

I flunked two out of three classes last term--*very* atypical for me--but chalked that up to morning sickness and feeling so bleh all the time but being too stubborn to withdraw. This time I have harder classes but am feeling better. I should be doing fine, but I cannot seem to focus.

I don't know what to do. It doesn't help that between midwife appts, CNM apppts cuz I wnat to get some tests done, the U/S appt on Wednesday, and now getting stithces in my foot and losign an afternoon to that and now having to make yet antoher appt to go in and get stitches out I am spendign all my studying time on health care stuff.

I can't even handle this job--that equates basically working mostly from home while pg, how the heck am i gonna handle it with a baby?!?!

Very discouraged and frustrated. I can't just be a mama, I hav eto be a provider too, and law school is only step one. We definitely can't afford for me to take time off or leave school, but me flunking out would just kill us financially, not to mention having to somehow find a fulltime job and childcare for a newborn.

I just don't know what to do.

[L'lee]

Sorry to hear you're going through this... :hug

[Happypants]

that sounds like no fun. :hug

i was in school full-time last semester, too, and also had a really hard time concentrating. i'm done now, but if i wasn't, i really don't know how i would still be going at it.

for me, making sure i was taking time for myself made a bit of a difference, and then really forcing myself to do my work when my "me" time was up.

good luck, i know it's not fun to have things like homework to think about when there's so much else to daydream about.

[ltk]

I feel ya sista'! I just went through 40 hour work weeks, plus 15 units last semester. I went slower than normal, and sacrificed ALL my holiday/weekend time to get it done. I still have several exams to study for and I do NOT want to do it. I wanna be in baby-daydream land!

Do you have a job now? Can you afford to start your courses over in the fall? Sometimes stopping IS the right thing to do, even when it contradicts your plan. If you are in Law School, you certainly have good education already and can count on making that money somehow. Give yourself a goal.....
1) go p/t until your babe is old enough to be with another caretaker (relative?
2) and then start cranking when that phase is over. You might have to adjust your timeline, which sucks, but in the end will be less maddening!
3) Also, I don't know what your hubby does, but this is the time for HIM to put in some extra time, so you can do what YOU need to do w/ the baby. As hard as it is, I know a lot of men will work extra so that their wife/partner can be the momma.....

I know you will figure something out....but sometimes WE have to give ourselves a break and adapt our expectations. :) good luck!

[Unreal]

Pregnancy is so weird.

With ds1, I took classes and did just fine. No problems. Got all the readings and assignments done way ahead of time--all that good nerdy stuff ;)

with ds2, I couldn't string more than 5 words together. I couldn't focus at all. I would read a page and then need to re-read half of it, beacuse I had no clue what I read.
I was okay with non schoolwork--I was working for the department copy-editing the journal they publish. I did fine with that.
I could help dh with his schoolwork and papers.
I just couldn't do anything with MY schoolwork.
I had to drop one class and ended up requesting some modification in other classes (I did projects instead of papers).

This time I'm not in school, but I'm working on my Childbirth Educator certification....
I'm not being nearly as productive as I should be, but I blame that on MDC, not the pregnancy :lol
Seriously though, I'm not at 100%, but I'm not as non-functional as I was last time around.
I think if I had an hour a day away from the kids, I would be getting a lot done.

hmm...is there a time of the day you feel more productive? Am or Pm...can you arrange to have more of that time alone?


oooh--can you find a study partner? To talk the readings and notes and stuff over with? That helped me SO much--just having someone to think outloud with (and keep me focused!)
Even online worked for me.

and...well...I don't know how strict/competitive your school is, but if you end up not being able to pull your grades up, it might be best to w/d for the semester.

:Hug

[provocativa]

Sister, you need some fish oil! Nordic Naturals has a lemon-flavored if you tend to be burpy. Seriously. We deplete our essential fatty acid stores and they tell us not to eat fish, so we're not getting enough (also important during breastfeeding). EFAs are brain food. The second trimester is rain growth time for baby, so she is sucking away all your good focus nutrients. I experience a major difference taking them. I won the family trivial pursuit at Xmas- unheard of for a preggo who can't remember anyone's name.

[radicalmama]

Oh tie I sooooooo understand.

I am going nuts with school and just got put on bedrest, but need to keep going for the aid money.

I have no good advice, but if you get some, please pass it my way!

[mamacatsbaby]

No advice, just lotsa :hug . I certainly hope that things become less stressful for you mama. :)

[zonapellucida]

(((((HUGS)))) I wish I had some suggestions beyond flash cards! Can you tape lectures and listen the them over and over?? I managed to get by with REALLY lousy grades in a Biochem program the year I had DD #3. It was NOT easy. I am not even sure how I did it, come to think of it as I kept falling asleep while reading the heavy tomes that would finally lead to my degree...........

[KatSG]

I agree about the fish oil supplements. It's also a good idea to make sure you're getting 80 grams of protein a day, something that's hard for me. You may also try tyrosine, an amino acid, as it also helps you produce seratonin so you can have a good attitude about the things that you're doing and not feel stressed out.

[Ksenia]

Tie-dyed, that really sucks. I also find that I don't enjoy doing intellectual work while pregnant - and I often tell myself that I can't. My pregnancy hormones cause my brain to want to daydream about birth and babies and stuff, or "escape" to watching a DVD or reading a novel.

Do the best that you can and if you get some bad results go to the school and try to get opportunities to re-write exams, etc. - IME savvy students often get away with a lot when they go behind the scenes and ask for accommodations. Obviously you have a very good excuse...

Hang in there!