Where will you birth your child?

[soccermominsd]

I am VERY seriously considering a homebirth. DH is in agreement for whatever I want. I had such an awful experience with the hospital birth of my 16yo DD that I won't go through the restrictions of being stuck in a bed the whole time. They wouldn't 'allow' me to get up not even once :angry No way Jose. I'm still not sure if a homebirth is the way we'll go-but it sure seems more appealing than the typical hospital strap-down experience to me.

I live in San Diego, California (Carlsbad to be exact)...anyone else live around here and have a good birthing experience (non-restrictive) at a hospital? Scripps La Jolla is where I had my DD last time but now they added a labor & delivery center in Encinitas. I was considering going to the Scripps L&D unit (http://www.scrippshealth.org/Services.asp?ID=139) and inquiring about what their policies are now (as far as restrictions, ect) as well as the UCSD birthing center (http://health.ucsd.edu/Women/child/facilities/center.htm).

I met w/ the midwife yesterday and she has 3 levels of service she can offer: Doula services where she is basically an advocate during the birthing process, Monitrice where she does all the clinical midwife prenatals and assists you during labor UP until you are ready to go to the hospital-then she goes with you; or Midwife services where she does the whole nine yards including homebirth. It's either Monitrice or homebirth for me.

I would love to hear your thoughts and what you 'think' you may do when the time comes :bouncy

[Earthy~Mama]

I just typed a long reply but my 6 yo just came and pressed esc so... I will go with the short verson. I want a homebirth. I had two hospital births and one waterbirth. The latter was definitly the best! The likely hood that I will have homebirth over here is slim :(

[mom2sweetboy]

At the same hospital where I had my son. They have rooming in with your baby and are very pro-breastfeeding (no botttles, pacifiers, etc).

[mama2silas]

Same hospital as with DS. I had a horrible experience, BUT not because of hospital policy or staff. The nursing staff was awesome, and the policies are even better now -- no baby leaves mom unless mom requests. They also have a level II NICU. I never thought that was important, but DS had a pneumothorax and was in the NICU for a week.

Plus, my new doctor is kinda head honcho there, and he is VERY pro-VBAC and low/no intervention, and what he says goes.

While my DH entrusts all pregnancy decisions to me, he is very against us having a homebirth. With DS, we were at least very close to a hospital (5-7 minutes). Now we are a good 15 minutes, and that hospital doesn't support vbacs, so I'd hate to have to go there in an emergency. I'll hang out at home for as long as possible though.

[honeybeedreams]

homebirth rocks!! i would never consider birthing in a medical environment unless i or the baby were literally dying.

this time we are further away from a midwife so we just borrowed a copy of "emergency childbirth!" :wink

[honeybeedreams]

to the OP... my son and i were looking at some homebirth photos last night and here's a few links to maybe help you make up your mind (don't know what your last births were like, but you might want to learn more about how different homebirth is to a medical enviroment)

http://www.nandu.hu/English/Childbirth/Csenge100/csbirth01.htm

http://www.waterbirthinfo.com/photos.html

http://www.fruitfulvine.com/story.html

HTH!

[chrissy]

definitely homebirth!! :thumb

my first was born in a hospital and it was not a good experience, to the say the least.

my second was born at home and it was absolutely the most beautiful, empowering experience of my life. i can't wait to do it again!

[ariahsmum]

We will plan to set things up for a home birth- or maybe even an outside-under- the-moon birth.

Even though I have done it before (well, while in a drug-induced coma in an operating room) I can NOT imagine birthing in the hospital unless it wass an emergency life threatening situation.

Still undecided on UC... but we can wait to decide until the baby's head crowns :lol

[mommy_milky]

I can only speak about my experience, but for us, homebirth was an amazing experience! The best way that I can describe our homebirth was peaceful. We labored, some friends, my mom and our midwife came by, and our daughter was born. Then, we crawled into bed and just hung out with our family! Obviously, not all homebirths are the same, but it felt great for us.

[chaibaby]

I would love to have a homebirth...my trouble is having to convince my husband. His sister gave birth last August two months early and so his only birth experience is an early birth that required our nephew to be in neonatal ICU for two months.
Regardless, we are reading lots of great books and researching all of the information in order to make an informed decision.

[ocelotmom]

We haven't decided between homebirth or the local hospital birthing center.

As far as homebirth goes, I'd love to, but there's a good chance that our home at the time of the birth won't be roomy or private enough for me to be comfortable, and will offer no chance of having a waterbirth (DH really wants us to move into an RV, and I'm coming around to the idea).

The birthing center... I'm a volunteer doula there, and that's definitely pushed me closer towards considering homebirth :) However, the births I've seen have all been fairly irregular cases - all were for non-English speakers who hadn't really communicated their desires to either me or the staff, all had pitocin (apparently their pitocin rate is around 15% normally). Most people I know rave about it - I'm just not sure they're as low-intervention as they talk.

Insurance will also play a role.

[katiesmom]

I would love to have a homebirth, but midwives aren't allowed to attend homebirths in IL. There is one place where the OB attends with the midwife, but they don't take our insurance and are $$. SO, I will hopefully have a midwife attended hospital birth. The whole insurance thing is really aggravating!

[LotusBirthMama]

A freebirth at home with my hubby and kids!

[Hayes]

home
I had 3 hospital births, 1 was tough, 1 was super easy, 1 was fine, but longer than expected.

Then, I had a homebirth. It was tough. shoulder dystocia, long pushing phase, especially considering my last babe practically fell out.

But I will be home. No way I will have another babe ina hospital unless there are serious issues with babe or me.

[chrissy]

We will plan to set things up for a home birth- or maybe even an outside-under- the-moon birth.l

Ah, outside!! Last time I labored all the way until the very end outside, under the moon. It was wonderful! I wish I'd have known ahead of time how much I loved it out there and I might have set my fishy pool up out there too.

[Media Mama]

We hope for a homebirth again - it was lovely - but I'm not opposed to going to the hospital if need be.

Those of you with other kids, do you plan to let them be at the birth, or will you have someone watch them offsite?

[soccermominsd]

Thanks everyone for sharing your experiences and intentions. I love hearing about the home births. Andrea, I checked out the links and loved the link that had the 100 photos of the homebirth-that was awesome.

One thing I'm curious about and forgive my ignorance...but how messy is a homebirth or is it? I have preconceived notions that it's really messy. The reason is I was at my girlfriends birth of her son 9 years ago in an L&D hospital unit-so she was lying down the whole time and there was a trash bag below the table catching everything & I mean everything. But on the photos that I mentioned above I saw barely anything, even when the baby was coming out (water birth); the midwife had a pooper-scooper in the pool which I can totally understand. So I guess since you are allowed to actually get up & go to the bathroom, there is probably less mess, am I right?

Sorry for my ignorance.. :down

[ocelotmom]

Those of you with other kids, do you plan to let them be at the birth, or will you have someone watch them offsite?

I have a 2.5 year old. I'd like to have him there for the birth itself, but I can't quite imagine either him or me doing well with him being there the whole time, so I plan to have a friend there who can take him out as needed or stay with me while DH takes him out.

[honeybeedreams]

i wouldn't let my son miss his sibling's birth for all the world (unless he decided he didn't want to be there). we will likely have someone here to help keep an eye on him though...

as far as messy... my partner had the pool drained and deflated before we were done measuring my son. and that was it! BTW, it's part of the midwife's job to help clean up. which is really nice.

you get some old towels and sheets to use and if you wish you can just throw them out or compost them... i washed and saved mine.

some people say they like how someone else takes care of everything for you at a hosp. or birth center... but really i can't imagine trading the comfort of my own home and the lack of pressure and interventions (not to mention no c-sections at home) for someone doing some laundry and bringing a few yucky meals. (i love that birth in 100 photos too)

[mommy_milky]

Messy is not how I would describe our homebirth! On our supply list was a big bag of chux pads, which the midwives kept laying down very effectively! IAfter my water broke I labored on our expensive ottoman and pushed sitting on couch cushions, and neither the ottoman or the couch cushions were any worse for the experience. After the baby is born is when the mess really starts! Mara has now peed and thrown up on the couch, both of which left more marks than the birth!

[amyro]

we're planning another home birth. We've moved to a new state since DD was born so it will be different midwives and a different home for that matter. But we can't wait!

And in my experience, home birth wasn't messy at all. When our midwives left after the birth there wasn't a speck of blood, poop, or other gunk anywhere and the laundry was all done and folded. We used lots of disposable chux, but my little corner of the landfill is MUCH smaller than if we'd been in the hospital!

[chrissy]

~older siblings at birth~
hopefully we'll have my MIL watch the kiddos at some location near our house during the intense parts of labor. i am not opposed to them being there, but i kind of am opposed to my MIL being there. :lol then when the time gets close we'll call them back so they can see the actual birth (as long as they want to). that's what we did last time and it worked really well. my labor was so surprising and happened so fast last time that they got there right in the nick of time.

~is it messy?~
as others have said, my midwife and her assistant did a lot of the cleaning up. i didn't realize i was in labor until i was pushing so we didn't have a lot of time to prepare (didn't get to put the shower curtain under the bed sheets) *and* i bled a lot right after birth so my mattress did get kind of stained. nothing else though and i didn't have any mess to clean up.

[princess83]

Im going to give birth at a hospital this time. I would love to have a home birth, but Im a little paranoid for the 1st time. Maybe the second baby!

[Media Mama]

I was very spoiled by my midwives. They not only cleaned up (including the birth tub), but warmed up dinner, made sure I was fed, and that we were all tucked into bed before leaving for the night. When we got up in the morning I think my house was cleaner than when they arrived! :lol

[Tori Gollihugh]

at home this time... YEAY!!!

[tabitha]

at home again, this time just me and karl and the kids, no midwives. so looking forward to it!

tabitha

[honeybeedreams]

Im going to give birth at a hospital this time. I would love to have a home birth, but Im a little paranoid for the 1st time. Maybe the second baby!

what are you paranoid about?

[cam&kat's_mom]

I would SOOOOO Love a homebirth. After 2 induced hospital births.. but i know DH wouldn't go for it.. he's too paranoid that somethign would go wrong. Or that somethign would be wrong with teh baby and we wouldn't get it to the hospital in time. (He's still learnign about all this natural stuff;) )

But i definately will avoid induction by all means!!! ( i really just want to go natural, on my own this time. ) I had no pain meds but the pitocin was terrible!! and my Dr was great adn let me do pretty much whatevere i wanted even though the nurses kept telling him i should be in bed with teh monitors on. So it'll probably be a hospital again.. but they are really good abotu breastfeedin and no pacis adn no bottels or anything. Also you have to specifically request a circ if you want one.. (They dont' do them routinely adn you have to actually "Hire" a Dr to do it cause most there won't.) So this hospital really is teh best option for us at this time. :) Maybe i can convince DH though. ;)

[Momof3Girlz]

I'm having a homebirth. I am considering doing a waterbirth as well.

[Media Mama]

Hurray for waterbirth! :love

[Momof3Girlz]

Media Mama,

I take it you have a really positive experience with homebirth? The ones I viewed on video just look so awesome! I am going to be doing some reading up on it.

[soccermominsd]

I am debating between a homebirth OR Monitrice care (laboring at home with the midwife and heading to the labor/delivery center when you're ready). I need to pick a provider and insurance network to be affiliated with for insurance purposes regardless if I have a homebirth or not.

Well, I just got off the phone with the Nurse Midwife who helped start the Scripps-Encinitas Labor & Delivery Center. What a wonderful woman. In picking the facility and provider (in case I do end up going in) I wanted to stress that I will be one of those women who won't do all the prenatal testing, that I will refuse to be strapped down and want to labor and birth in any position I feel comfortable (if I go this route); and she replied that is what she had worked for in this L & D unit. I did mention we were considering homebirth and she said she and many of the other Nurse midwives in her practice had their babies at home...isn't that cool? I was considering affiliation with the UCSD birthing center, but it's very far from here and I don't want to be in the throws of contractions in a car for 30 minutes when this center is 5 minutes away.

I figure I will work most extensively with my Monitrice (Doula who does prenatals) the whole time and the hospital is there IF I need it or choose to utilize at the last minute.

--------------------

Forgot to mention...thanks to everyone who enlightened me to my question on whether homebirth was messy. I truly appreciate you taking the time to tell me about your experiences.

[honeybeedreams]

just remember, when you buy the hospital ticket, you get the whole ride.

when you are at home, you will have no chance of having invasive proceedures, change of staff (which you can't choose) and of course the time pressure of having to birth within a certain number of hours or you get a c-section. (in a hospital you must start labor within a certain number of hours after your membranes rupture or you get induced and if you don't birth within a certain number of hours of labor you get sectioned. period.)

just realize you are getting all of that if you choose a hospital birth.

GL!

[soccermominsd]

Thanks for your Feeback Andrea, I am keeping that in mind :thumb

[Media Mama]

Media Mama,

I take it you have a really positive experience with homebirth? The ones I viewed on video just look so awesome! I am going to be doing some reading up on it.

I was very happy with my choice. We were very lucky that we didn't need to go to the emergency room for any reason, but we were close enough to the hospital (20 min) that if we had needed to, we could be there quickly. I also asked at the two best hospitals in town about the different birthcenters in Portland and chose the one that both hospitals recommended (basically, they said that in an emergency some midwives wait a little too long and bring their moms in when they are in crisis, but the midwives we worked with had a great reputation with the backup doctors and emergency room staff for bringing moms in before they had "crashed.") That said, however, I think that most midwives will know if you're a good candidate for a homebirth long before that moment, good rep or not!

[honeybeedreams]

i have only heard one woman (out of all the women i met in the homebirth community!) who disliked homebirth, but that was not because of the homebirth aspect, it was becuase she is truely very terrifed of birth period. she has not had a hospital birth, but she thinks that drugs may help her cope better. but hwo knows, the hospital may make her veen more scared and she might have a worse experience. but other than this one woman, i have never heard of any other women that regretted her homebirth... that is opposed to the 100s of women i have talked with who HATED their hospital births.

just more food for thought.

[deleria]

Quebec is not a very homebirth-friendly province, unfortunately. While we do live about five minutes from the Ontario border, I don't think I'd feel comfortable using a friend's house to birth in (considering I have very long labours!)

My first two were born in the hospital. Our second was a c-section (due to a lot of pressure in the hospital more than anything) so we've decided to go with a birthing center w/midwives this time around. I'm calling tomorrow to put my name on the waiting list and will hope that they're as keen about my VBAC ideas as I am!

[annethcz]

Another homebirth. I've had 2 homebirths, and I can't imagine doing it any other way without a valid medical reason.

I'll also chime in and say that my homebirths weren't messy at all. But I think that a big part of that was because the bag of waters was intact until the pushing stage. The chux pads on the bed very easily contained the amniotic fluid and small amount of blood that accompanied birth.

just remember, when you buy the hospital ticket, you get the whole ride.
I think this is really important to remember. While you should feel free to ask that certain requests be accomidated, it's not fair to go into a hospital birth expecting that they will throw out all of their protocols and standard procedures just for you.

[ArlyShellandKai]

:homebirth



Michele

[honeybeedreams]

While you should feel free to ask that certain requests be accomidated, it's not fair to go into a hospital birth expecting that they will throw out all of their protocols and standard procedures just for you.

a friend of mine from ICAN says, "if you go into mcdonalds and order a steak, you aren't confused about why they don't give it to you, are you?"

:thumb

you can write whatever you want on your birth plan, but in the end it doesn't really matter if it isn't on the menu.

[chrissy]

:clap

yep. i didn't realize that with my first. i really thought i'd write my birth plan, go into the hospital and have the birth i wanted. well it just doesn't work that way, at least not for the vast majority of people.

[babycatcher01]

This one will be at home again, grandma will deliver, hubby will rub my back. And most wonderful of all, every one will make me a full corse breakfast and marval at the new little guy.

[Alimaccat]

Unfortunately, I will probably not have a choice. I have had high blood pressure (as do my sister, parents and grandparents) since I was 27, despite being young and healthy with no other risk factors. High blood pressure and birth centers are not usually compatible. I was an on-call RN at the local freestanding birth center for 2 years, so I know that I will probably "risk-out." To make matters worse, I have also worked in NICU and hospital L&D during my time as a nurse, so I know what happens to mothers and babies in hospitals. I am already grieving over the fact that I may not have a choice when it comes to my own birth!

I find it frustrating that so many healthy low-risk women who could have the natural birth I dream of would choose to be strapped down in a hospital...and they don't seem to mind! :irked:

I am trying to cope as best I can. I have a few natural birth friendly friends that work as nurses at the hospital where I will deliver and the midwives I know and trust can deliver there as well. I will stay with them unless medical indications would necessitate that I transfer to an OB.

Thanks for listening to me vent. I envy all of you who have the choice to deliver at home. You are truly blessed.

[honeybeedreams]

Unfortunately, I will probably not have a choice. I have had high blood pressure (as do my sister, parents and grandparents) since I was 27, despite being young and healthy with no other risk factors. .

you always have a choice, that's part of they way they control us, by making us believe we don't have choices. have you read the story of the breech (first) birth at "the farm" in the birthstories section?

i'm sure there are midwives you can consult with down there and if your BP is controlled i can't see why it would be an issue.

and there is always UC, i know several L&D nurses who have had UCs.

GL!

[leurMaman]

We had our son in a free-standing birth center. It was a lovely birth except for one party - when I passed out for a few minutes. My husband was so nervous that he's pleaded with me to have this second one naturally, but in a hopsital. I found a team of nurse midwives (I did a meet and greet with them, and they are really great) at a hospital near me that has a good reputation for natural births. I'm happy with this decision (though the room won't be nearly as luxurious and pretty as the one in the birth center).

[Alimaccat]

you always have a choice, that's part of they way they control us, by making us believe we don't have choices. have you read the story of the breech (first) birth at "the farm" in the birthstories section?

I know the choices that are available to me. I have been researching natural birth for over 5 years as I originally went to nursing school with the intent of becoming a midwife. Yes, I do know the story.

i'm sure there are midwives you can consult with down there and if your BP is controlled i can't see why it would be an issue.

I am currently seeing the midwives from the birth center. They know me well after working with me for two years, but they are also limited by their own protocols. My BP is controlled now, but I am also at a higher risk for PIH. My mother and sister developed PIH with all their pregnancies and there is a genetic component to the condition.

and there is always UC, i know several L&D nurses who have had UCs.

UC is not a choice I could make for myself for personal and professional reasons.

Thank you for your encouragement, but I am trying to be realistic about the choices available to me. I will fight hard within the system I know for the natural birth I desire. I have attended over 150 births as nurse, so I am well aware of how to work the system to my advantage.

[soccermominsd]

I hate to sound ignorant...but I've read "UC" in other posts and I'm not sure what it means. What is UC?

[honeybeedreams]

UC = unassisted childbirth.

a birth where there are no paid birth attendents. (there is a forum here on MDC for it)

[honeybeedreams]

Thank you for your encouragement, but I am trying to be realistic about the choices available to me. I will fight hard within the system I know for the natural birth I desire. I have attended over 150 births as nurse, so I am well aware of how to work the system to my advantage.

good! then you do have choices, i wouldn't want to give anyone new to the birthing community the impression that there aren't choices, because there are always choices, even if they would be really hard to make.


:D

[soccermominsd]

Unless something medical comes up that dictates otherwise - DH & I have definatively decided to do a hombirth :)

I keep coming across so many stories of women fighting to have a natural childbirth-I don't want to fight. We're pretty tight on funds right now, so the midwife expenses are going to be a sacrafice. We still need the insurance through the state, which will be minimal, but will pay for all the tests and such we will need.

Now if I could just relax a bit more and enjoy this pg. I get peaceful, but then I feel overwhelmed with worry. UHG!

[Media Mama]

We decided to use a midwife last time in order to have a homebirth and had to pay for the entire thing out of pocket. At the time I thought spending the money was a sacrifice too. But now I know it was an investment. Even if we hadn't been able to have a homebirth and had ended up in the hospital, I wouldn't have traded the excellent prenatal care for anything (even insurance coverage :D ). We're planning the same thing with this baby (home water birth) with the same midwife and will be paying out of pocket again. This time we know that while the expense may seem high, there's no amount of money worth worrying about when it comes to this amazing experience. The money will come from somewhere, and after the birth you probably won't even remember where! But the baby - :heartbeat - you won't forget a single thing about where he or she comes from!

[cam&kat's_mom]

good! then you do have choices, i wouldn't want to give anyone new to the birthing community the impression that there aren't choices, because there are always choices, even if they would be really hard to make.


:D


You're right there are choices but it becomes more and more apparent with each post i read that if you pick a choice that others disagree with they will to no end try and convince you that your choice is wrong or somehow there is a better choice out there.

oh and FWIW I had a birth plan with both kids that was followed EXACTALLY as I wished. Even parts that went against hospital policy (Allowing a induced mother to walk the floors and use whirlpool tub to relieve pain)
Im not wanting to debate here. But i thought the topic was where are you giving birth. not why homebirth is so much better than a hospital? Or maybe I misread.. sorry if i did. :(

[chrissy]

:hug cam and kats mom, i'm sorry you feel attacked. i don't even have any idea if the quote you posted was intended for you.

i do want to respond to your posts though. your earlier post in this thread was a lot different than this later post. in your earlier post you said you would love a homebirth, but that your dh wouldn't go for it- based upon fears that aren't grounded in reality. that always kind of gets my dander up, as a homebirther. choosing to have a homebirth is NOT the same as choosing to have a less safe birth, in fact those of us who choose homebirth believe it it to be the safest choice.

anyway, mdc is a natural family living website and supports and promotes homebirth. lots and lots of us here do believe that home is the safest place for healthy moms and babes to birth. i don't think anybody wants to make you feel inferior for your choice but many of us do want to stress that it IS a choice- a safe and often superior choice for mom and baby. (and i don't mean moms who homebirth *are* superior just that the choice is often best for both mom and baby.

i truly am sorry that you felt attacked.

[lotusdebi]

I hope to have a waterbirth at home. We still have to meet the midwife, but my DP is already mostly convinced that a homebirth will be safe.

I had my son at a birth center. It was a good, empowering experience, but I strongly feel that a homebirth will be even better! If I have any kids after this one, I may even be ready for a UC!

[cam&kat's_mom]

:hug cam and kats mom, i'm sorry you feel attacked. i don't even have any idea if the quote you posted was intended for you.

i do want to respond to your posts though. your earlier post in this thread was a lot different than this later post. in your earlier post you said you would love a homebirth, but that your dh wouldn't go for it- based upon fears that aren't grounded in reality. that always kind of gets my dander up, as a homebirther. choosing to have a homebirth is NOT the same as choosing to have a less safe birth, in fact those of us who choose homebirth believe it it to be the safest choice.

anyway, mdc is a natural family living website and supports and promotes homebirth. lots and lots of us here do believe that home is the safest place for healthy moms and babes to birth. i don't think anybody wants to make you feel inferior for your choice but many of us do want to stress that it IS a choice- a safe and often superior choice for mom and baby. (and i don't mean moms who homebirth *are* superior just that the choice is often best for both mom and baby.

i truly am sorry that you felt attacked.


I actually wasn't really feeling attacked. I was jsut pointing out somethign I and a friend that reads here have noticed (she's too scared to post cause she's overly sensitive and feels attacked abotu everything .. her words not mine ;) )
AND you are right I woudl love a home birth. I am not saying it is unsafe. It does hurt though fo ryou to tell me that my husbands fears are not grounded in reality. You don't know his situation and having lost a niece during a homebirth (NOT Saying that she wouldnt' have passed if she were born in teh hospital) he has right to fear for his child's life regardless of where they are born and if he finds more comfort knowing that medical technology is there than the thought can comfort him.
Also I personally feel that teh brith (and every other parenting decision) of a child is a decision that needs to be made by both parents. It is selfish in my opinion to ignore his fears adn tell him too bad, I'm delivering where i want to.
I wasn't angry about the choices comment.Just wanted to point out that this wasn't the homebirthing forum and "thought" that we were just stating what we were going to do. Not trying to convince each other otherwise. I'm sorry if i misunderstood the purpose of this thread. Sometimes a helpful PM with a link to info or a simple post...
Anyone that is unsure abotu homebirth here's some great info...
Woudl be better and more appreciated than comments that are slated one way or another.
Again. Sorry- this is why it took SO LONG for me to register adn come out of Lurk Mode. :(

[soccermominsd]

I think cam&kat's mom has a point. I have noticed challenges to when women post their choice to birth at a hospital. I intended for this thread to generate discussions on where we all were choosing to birth our babies and why. It enlightens me to know & understand why some women choose to go one route and other women to go another; whether it's hospital, birth center, home birth/water birth with a MW or unassisted birth. It's a very personal choice based on perceptions of birth, your DH's wishes plus a myriad of emotional and physical reasons that may not be revealed.

I agree with chrissy that this is definately a pro-natural birthing board as a whole. Yet I've read in other due date clubs where other women express their choice or decision to go to a hospital with no challenge to their decision; they are simply just expressing themselves.

I would encourage anyone who wishes to post where they are having their children and why. There may be other women like you who are making the same choice and it encourages them in that choice, even though it may not be the popular one on this board :)

[geekmediainc]

At home, unassisted.

[chrissy]

yeah, i think by all means everybody should feel free to say where they are birthing. i don't think anybody challenged anybody on that though. :shrug i didn't mean to if i did.

we all make the choice we think is best.

[leurMaman]

I don't sense any great judgment or hostility in any of these posts. I am a newbie to the Mothering forum (last pregnancy I was on ivillage.com message boards and felt that everyone had very different opinions that I did in just about every aspect of parenting - not that that is bad:)

Anyway, I have to chime in just because I'm one of the hospital birth posters. I want to stress that I don't think homebirth or birthcenter births are dangerous in themselves. I think that 90% of pain and safetly during birth is controlled by the mother and the father's mind/body/spirit connections. There is still the 10% that is out of our control - and that can happen at a hospital too.

I started out wanting to have this second birth at a birthcenter like the first one. My husband literally begged me to have it at a hospital. The reason is this: during my 14 hours of labor, I passed out at one point. The midwife, who was capable and seasoned, panicked and ran out of the room to get another midwife. I had collapsed in my husbands arms and was out cold for several minutes. She left him alone, and he sat there weeping thinking that he was going to lose me and the baby. Until that moment, he would have been the one arguing for a homebirth or birthcenter birth. After that experience, he is too traumatized to face it again. He took 10 weeks of Bradley Method classes with me and is an amazing force of stregth and love duirng the birth process. He wants us to do it naturally - just like the first time - but in a hospital. When I saw the deep care in his eyes, I conceded that I would try it once. I like the team of midwifes that works there, and I've heard good things about their support of birthplans, waterbirths, and med-free births.

I have nothing against birthcenters. What happened to us was a fluke. It was, nonetheless, a failure on the part of the midwife. She should have been more careful of my husband's emotions and explained things more thoroughly. I'm sure that this is not likely to happen again, but the damage has already been done to my husband.
Fathers undergo just as much of an emotional shock as mothers do - and I think they should be listened to about birth plans as well. Of course, I can't think of anything more beautiful than a father delivering their own baby at home either - but I just wanted to support what Cam&Kat'sMom said about her husband's fears and feelings. I know each of us are making the best decision for their families:)

[alison_in_oh]

There are a lot of factors involved that we will have to work out. We are moving in June to one of 9 cities, all of which have different birthing options and cultural atmospheres. My husband is in training to be an emergency physician, so he is well versed in the myriad rare complications that would make immediate obstetric response important, so I predict he will object to a non-hospital birth. And I still have some fears to work through, for example I was born by emergency, crash C-section (they cut my mom so quickly she wasn't fully anesthetized yet). Monetarily, we will probably have insurance for a hospital's network of physicians, and I doubt it will cover a birthing center or homebirth midwife even 60%.

On the other hand, the most beautiful image I can conceive of is having my family together under our own roof from the first moment my baby draws breath. Cuddling up in our own bed instead of waiting 12-24 hours and strapping a tiny newborn into a cold plastic car seat.

So I guess we'll find out where we're going, have another "medwife" visit, and start making decisions from there.

[honeybeedreams]

my .02. making an informed, empowered choice about where to birth is miles away from making a choice based on uninformed fear, pressure from others or bowing to convention.

phrases like... "too paranoid" "no choice" "my doctor told me" etc are red flags to me that the women has likely NOT throughly investigated the safety and reality of homebirth and is not making an empowered choice... and while it's not my place to point this out... it is my place to point out that this this is a forum that does support NON-medicalized birth that is grounded in evidence based research about what is best for mother and baby, rather than convenience based medicine, which is is only best for the doctor, hospital and insurance companies.

i throughly support any woman who has looked at each and every option she has, throughly and with open eyes and heart and made a decision based on what is best for her, her baby and her family.

i will not, and refused to be guilted into, support any woman who chooses any option for birthing when she has not thoughtfully and throughly considered what is truly best for her baby.

i am a homebirth advocate. i believe it is what is best for women, babies, families and society. i believe hospital birth is only for very few women who have very special situations and issues. i believe almost all women can birth safely without medical interventions at home. and i will speak my truth when i feel it is the right thing to do.

[cam&kat's_mom]

Sory ladies for getting all bent out of shape over this. Pregnancy hormones are in full rage already adn i'm barely 6 weeks!!
I'm going to do some research for Dh to show him how safe it can be, and that way he will be informed. Regardless if it changes his decision or not at least he will have the information. It has really helpe d me to read everyone's reasonign behind their decisions though. And if i found enough positive informaton for him he woudl be more understanding adn more willing to give it a try.
And actuallly i was thinkin today a lot abotu this and what i believe as a person adn what kind of life i want for my childrne and am thinking even more that I want to try the homebirth.. but just need to find the right approach for him. (Also doesnt' help that the nearest midwife is about 1 hour away:() But i did met a person IRL today that had a homebirth in my town and she's gonna give me her midwives name and info (At least the lady will know where' she's going LOL)

[lotusdebi]

it is my place to point out that this this is a forum that does support NON-medicalized birth that is grounded in evidence based research about what is best for mother and baby, rather than convenience based medicine, which is is only best for the doctor, hospital and insurance companies.

i throughly support any woman who has looked at each and every option she has, throughly and with open eyes and heart and made a decision based on what is best for her, her baby and her family.

i will not, and refused to be guilted into, support any woman who chooses any option for birthing when she has not thoughtfully and throughly considered what is truly best for her baby.


:clap

I appreciate you speaking up and reminding everyone that this is a natural family living board.

The evidence shows that, for the majority of births, less medical intervention leads to better outcomes for mother and child. So, in most cases, a birth center birth is better than a hospital birth. And a homebirth is better than a birth center birth. Of course, both because this is a natural family living site, and because of the evidence, MDC is going to support homebirths rather than hospital births (again, for the majority of circumstances). People here shouldn't have to apologize for stressing the benefits of having homebirths. And the people here who are choosing to have hospital births shouldn't be surprised that there are many here who want to educate them about other, safer options.

[ladybugchild77]

I am "hoping" for a home/water birth but am a "high risk" pregnancy so we'll just have to see. Dh's aunt is actually a midwife who has 30+ years of experience so I am very comfortable with her delivering the baby. With dd I had a midwife in the hospital and most of my birth plan was followed - I had pitocin after 26 hours of labor and stalling at 6cm. I did have no pain drugs but those three hours were the most awful of my life (sorry to scare first time Mamas but pitocin is not called "the pit" for no reason!!! No wonder most Mamas have to have pain meds - OUCH!) I had a doula with me and until the pitocin I labored in the bathtub. I had a pretty good experience but I want to try it at home this time!:thumb

[leurMaman]

:clap

And the people here who are choosing to have hospital births shouldn't be surprised that there are many here who want to educate them about other, safer options.

Okay - first, I'm really enjoying this board and all you ladies on it. I'm not offended, and I totally don't feel attacked. So this is not some hot topic thread I'm trying to feed. I just wanted to clarify that while I've chosen a hospital birth this time around (after having tried a birth center), I am not going to support medical interventions during the birth. I am a seasoned birther, so I know my body and the process enough to know how to demand respect for my birth plan. I have also carefully chosen a women's center that has a team of midwives who happen to deliver in a very nice maternity center. I live in Seattle, and we just got ranked 6th in the nation for best birth cities. The hospital I've chosen is very progressive and has a great reputation for respecting mothers during birth. The team of midwives that I see have an acupuncturist and a hypnotherapist in their office that work along beside them for birth preparation, treatments, and pain relief during birth. I think I'm lucky to have this option - and the women that I've talked to who gave birth with this team succeeded in their natural births and had good experiences. This is an exception to the hospital standard, and so I don't think that it is an "unsafe" option for me. I have done my research. I am going through Bradley Method training this year to teach/host classes, so I am very serious about med-free births. I think the problem is that most hospitals are not an environment appropriate for a natural birth - and so when you hear me say the word "hospital", you feel concern for me...and I appreciate that.

[honeybeedreams]

i think there are a few baby-safe hopsitals in the country.

very very few, but they do exist. i know a woman who birthed in SF in CA and she decided to not even try nursing (she had BRS, but has some serious body issues too), which she never told anyone and there was NO formula in the hospital for her baby. the doc had to write an order for it before the hospital could get some for her. (man was her midwife pissed she didn't tell anyone she wasn't even gonna try)

so i do think some hospitals are better than others... and i do think that as long as you (general you) have explored the issues fully and made an informed choice, then it is likely a Good Thing.

[Chicky2]

HOMEBIRTH alllll the way!!!! If it werne't going to be getting cooler, my dh wanted to build a birth hut in the woods. he was going to run water down there and I'd do a waterbirth outside. I do plan to at least labor outside alot. A walk in the woods under the moon will be fab!

My first birth was a hospital birth which ended in incorrectly diagnosed CPD. I just got stuck at 4 because I was in a bed, and couldn't get up. So I didn't dilate fast enough for my ob.

2nd birth was in a free standing birth center. Last birth was at home, in deep water. THE BEST!!!!!

I will definitley do another waterbirth this time!

[carrieV]

Wow, it is so nice to see so many women having babies at home! This is my first baby, and I am planning on having it at home too. I work as a doula, and the most wonderful experiences I have seen were at home! I cant imagin going to a hospital. That is one of the more scary things I can think of. Well unless it is 100% necessary... I guess it is a blessing they exist. but not for a normal birth

[Media Mama]

I live in Seattle, and we just got ranked 6th in the nation for best birth cities.

:thumb

I saw that too, and not trying to one up or anything, but I live in Portland and we were ranked number one! Hurray for the Northwest! :D

[alison_in_oh]

I saw that too, and not trying to one up or anything, but I live in Portland and we were ranked number one! Hurray for the Northwest! :D

LOL, you just upped my anxiety a notch. ;) We are hoping :fingersx: HOPING to move back to PDX this June, but it's not entirely up to us and we'll get the news in a little under three weeks. *anxious*

Where are these rankings from? I'd like to look up our other potential cities!

[Helen White]

I'd love to have a homebirth, but there aren't really any midwives to speak of in my area. That is to say, I know of one, but she's not certified, and I was unable to find any who are. I plan on renewing my search this time around. In retrospect, we could have had DD with an unassisted birth. We barely made it to the hospital, had her on the floor by the elevator, and she was crying before anything but her head had made it out. lol Still, I'm not comfortable in planning an unassisted birth, and that may very well be my only option with a homebirth.

[leurMaman]

Alison in OH - let me think...I think I read the birth cities in Fit Pregnancy.

Helen White - that is soooo funny that you had your daughter on the floor next to the elevator. Guess she was in a hurry to meet you!

[alison_in_oh]

Alison in OH - let me think...I think I read the birth cities in Fit Pregnancy.

Thanks! I found it, here is the link if anyone else is interested:
http://www.fitpregnancy.com/bestcities/

How relieving, our top five or so cities are all in the top 20 of that ranking. :)

On the other hand, some of the details in the "needs improvement" sections are kind of worrisome. :(

[Kathryn]

Unassisted home birth. Wouldn't do anything else.


OT, but hi LotusDebi! :wave

[lotusdebi]

Hi, Kathryn! :love

[Kathryn]

Did you ever figure an edd or are you just going by October and November like me? :lol

[lotusdebi]

I still don't know exactly. I'm putting my EDD at Oct. 25. I think I'm due within five days of that, in either direction (so anywhere from Oct. 20-Oct. 30.) So, I'm hanging in both Oct. and Nov. DDCs. :D

Halloween is my favorite holiday, but I can't imagine being in labor while kids in costumes were ringing my doorbell, looking for treats. And on that night of the year, me screaming my head off wouldn't scare them away!

[Kathryn]

Mine is coming in around the 23rd. It'd be neat to have a couple day old baby on halloween.

[Peony]

Homebirth for us.

[leurMaman]

lotusdebi - that cracked me up! I never thought about the dynamics of trying to labor with kids ringing the doorbell over and over! Maybe you could post a sign on the front lawn that says: "Sorry, we're busy delivering a little warewolf"....

[Media Mama]

We are hoping :fingersx: HOPING to move back to PDX this June

If you do (:thumb ), you should check out the Alma birth center. Laura Erikson, my midwife from last time - and this time too - just started it about a year ago. It's LOVELY, close-in SE, and she really, really rocks. Years and years of experience, super supportive, and what we love the most - you just feel good when you're around her :love .

We'll think happy Portland thoughts for you!! :wink

[littleteapot]

Home, unassisted.

My daughter was home, short transfer to the birth center in where I was WAYYY too cowardly to face the drive back home on unpaved potholed roads while in transition, so I stayed and ended up having her ten minutes later! Guess it was a good thing I stayed... I would have had her in the back of my midwife's van.

My son was UP, but born "emergency" c-section. Died soon after.

I'll be damned if I ever have a baby in a hospital again. Hospitals are for sick and broken people, not for pregnant people!

[greeniegreen]

We're absolutely having a homebirth. I've worked attending births for many years and have experienced supporting women in a variety of settings and you'd have to drag me kicking and screaming into a hospital. Besides the nice wallpaper and their appearances of being family friendly, I don't agree with their philosophies on management or how their malpractice insurance dictates how they practice (even if that goes against the research). Even the nicest doctors and midwives still induce, deep suction babies, manipulate babies as they're being born, cut episiotomies, etc. Their protocols dictate all of that, it has nothing to do with their own personality. No way.

Helen White - there are many fabulous midwives who are not certified. Some do it because of philosophical reasons vs not having enough experience. I know of an extremely experienced midwife near me who has been practicing for over 30 years and is a wealth of knowledge who chooses not to become certified because she doesn't want to follow the state's protocols. Not sure if that applies to the midwife that you had heard of, but that's an insider's perspective ;) as I'm not sure if I might ever choose to become certified if I decide to start practicing again, especially if protocols get anymore restrictive.

[greeniegreen]

Scripps La Jolla is where I had my DD last time but now they added a labor & delivery center in Encinitas. I was considering going to the Scripps L&D unit (http://www.scrippshealth.org/Services.asp?ID=139) and inquiring about what their policies are now (as far as restrictions, ect) as well as the UCSD birthing center (http://health.ucsd.edu/Women/child/facilities/center.htm).


Just had to respond to this because I HATE how hospitals are now stealing the term birth center or family birth center away. Birth center/family birth center, unless it's independent, is the new term for labor and delivery ward. Most of them do cesareans on the same floor. That one always gets my feathers ruffled up, but I don't think that a lot of people realize the difference between hospital-based ones and independent ones.

[Helen White]

Helen White - there are many fabulous midwives who are not certified. Some do it because of philosophical reasons vs not having enough experience. I know of an extremely experienced midwife near me who has been practicing for over 30 years and is a wealth of knowledge who chooses not to become certified because she doesn't want to follow the state's protocols. Not sure if that applies to the midwife that you had heard of, but that's an insider's perspective ;) as I'm not sure if I might ever choose to become certified if I decide to start practicing again, especially if protocols get anymore restrictive.

Thanks for the input. I'm sure there are some wonderful uncertified midwives, but I've seen threads here on MDC warning about the uncertified midwife I was referring to. I have to admit that certification would be a big plus for me, as it would give me more confidence about a midwife's experience and training, but it's not my only consideration.

This week I've actually been given information about a couple local certified midwives, but I don't know that we can afford them. It's hard to come up with that much money when we still have student loans and are trying to get out of credit card debt, especially when we have great insurance that will cover 100% of our expenses if we go with an ob and hospital birth.

[alison_in_oh]

If you do (:thumb ), you should check out the Alma birth center. Laura Erikson, my midwife from last time - and this time too - just started it about a year ago. It's LOVELY, close-in SE, and she really, really rocks. Years and years of experience, super supportive, and what we love the most - you just feel good when you're around her :love .

We'll think happy Portland thoughts for you!! :wink

Seriously? Augh, I've been drooling over Alma for a couple of weeks now, and I was going to ask your recommendation when we get the news, because it sounds like you've been so comfortable with your birth choices.

I dunno. I'm trying to make myself be happy with OHSU, they have a very nice looking birthing suite and waterbirthing midwives. But chances are we'll at least tour Alma. Who knows. ;) And I have to keep reminding myself that it's not a sure thing that we'll even be in PDX.

But thanks for the good thoughts! Every little bit helps. :D

[carriepurkhiser]

Homebirth! Homebirth! Homebirth! If you are a low risk pregnancy - WHY NOT! We have had wonderful experiences with homebirths.

Our first two children (ages 6 and 3) we had a midwife attend.

With our third child (19 months) we were suppose to have a midwife, but the baby couldn't wait, so my husband delivered him in the garden tub (all 9 pounds 10 ounces of him!).

Our fourth (7weeks today) we had at home, but had a local doctor attend because he only lives 10 minutes away. The dr. was called as soon as I was sure I was really in labor this time. He arrived 11 minutes later (talk about being able to get dressed quickly - it was 2:35 am). I delivered (8 pound 13 oz baby girl in our garden tub)just a short 9 minutes after he arrived. He didn't interfere, just was here if we needed him (for emergency - like shoulder distocia). - It's so funny, my 7 week old has a preference on where she wants to take her bath - she smiles and loves to be in the garden tub - the exact spot she was born. She is so calm when she has her bath there, but not in the baby tub or the other bathroom!

Homebirth is such a serene experience. It is so wonderful - I would give anything to be back delivering any one of my children. It is so quiet and peaceful during labor. The only sound being made is you breathing or softly moaning/grunting and sometimes the sound of your husbands voice whispering encouraging words to you. No one is there telling you what to do and when to do it. No one is nervous and running around like something is wrong. There are no monitors, straps, needles, or other means. There is no rush to weigh the baby or take the baby away from mom. I stayed in the tub a good 35-40 minutes after birth just enjoying my new baby, until I wanted to get out!!

That first moment you meet your child eye to eye, in the comfort of your own home, without loud noises or bright lights, is a moment you will never forget, and NEVER want to end!

There are SSSOOOO MANY advantages to homebirth! I could list them forever, but I don't have time right now!

Good Luck and RESEARCH, RESEARCH, RESEARCH!!!!!!

Carrie

[faithhopelove]

We are having another homebirth.

My first was a c-section. Second was a homebirth with a midwife. My last baby was born at home unassisted and it was thes best birth ever. We didn't plan to UC though... hubby was always gung ho about it, I wasn't though. But, at 38wks we KNEW all of a sudden it was what we were supposed to do and fired the midwife. (who was awesome by the way)

For this one... people think it's automatic that I would have another UC. But, I really have no feelings about it at the moment. Right now we are in Delaware and are moving to Iowa at the end of my pregnancy. I've decided to get prenatal care at a birth center here (I just learned they will do prenatals for me, even though they won't do vbacs there, yay!), then switch to a homebirth midwife in Iowa and if I get the feeling to UC again... well, awesome :)

CRystal

[bartokg]

We had both of our boys out of hospital in a birthing center--our second was born under water--wouldn't pass up the freedoms of out of hospital birth for anything (minus a true emergency). The next one, we've decided, we'll have at home. We are very excited and looking forward to it.

[DavinaT]

I must say I was horrified to hear of women being strapped down in hospital for birthing :( It sounds like some kind of torture :(
Here women, including those on pain meds and those who have been induced are free to walk around, stretch, squat, lie down, even take a bath while in labour in hospital. They are required to check back with the staff for monitoring every hour or so but aren't confined to bed unless very ill and unless there is an emergency, in the major city hospitals (can't be sure about rural ones) the birth plan is respected generally unless there is an emergency.

The one thing that would concern me about a home birth and feel free to advise, flame, attack etc on reading this - is the pain.
I have heard it described as unremitting excrutiating agony. My eldest sister remembers screaming the place down and actually went past her pain threhold and passed out at one point attempting to have a natual birth. As a result her blood pressure and her baby baby's heart rate dropped so low, she ended up with an emergency c-section, which she hadn't envisaged. :(

On baby No.2, she had an epidural on request and had a lovely calm birth anbd could enjoy her baby, I fact she said the worst part was the stiff feeling in her legs afterward but says she's definitely going for an epidural with baby No3.

So maybe you can see why I am a little put off by the idea of a natural home birth. Bear in mind, I am a woman who almost passed out while having an IUD inserted (had to be manually dilated - ugh!! :irked:

As I said, please feel free to advise, attack, assist, flame etc. I don't get easily offended :D

[ocelotmom]

It largely depends on the US hospital. My local hospital encourages walking, laboring out of bed, and changing position. They do constantly monitor people being induced or if they're worried, but they can move around and go in the water with monitors on. Women are allowed to eat and drink as much as they desire throughout labor. They have big tubs, do waterbirth, and encourage this over pain medication. All of this applies to women on pain meds or being induced, too. I'm a volunteer doula there, and I expect I've seen the worst that this hospital has to offer. I'm still pretty comfortable with the idea of giving birth there. Moreso than with the idea of homebirth given our probable living arrangement (nothing against homebirth there at all. I'll switch in a heartbeat it if we're living somewhere where I feel comfortable with it.)

On the other hand, it wouldn't matter how uncomfortable my living situation was - I wouldn't set foot in the hospital where I gave birth to my son again.

As for the pain - read positive birth stories, and try not to let your sister's experience influence you too much. Maybe it will happen, but your mental state can have such an impact on how you perceive labor. During my own labor, the only times I really had a problem coping was when I thought of the phrase "excruciating back labor". A doula is also a great idea.

[Teri Lynn]

I would love to have a homebirth, but midwives aren't allowed to attend homebirths in IL. There is one place where the OB attends with the midwife, but they don't take our insurance and are $$. SO, I will hopefully have a midwife attended hospital birth. The whole insurance thing is really aggravating!
There are CNMs who do homebirths, legally, (it's CPMs who are not legal yet in IL.) in IL who also accept insurance. If you are in the Chicago area, there is a group of homebirthers, midwives, doulas, etc. that meets monthly to discuss issues around homebirth. For info on them, go to homebirth.meetup.com.
If you need names of midwives, let me know.
Blessings!

[Chicky2]

The "Pain" of homebirth....Well, I can honestly say that yes, it hurts. But yk what? I was prepared for it, had an excellent support team who knew just what to say right when I needed it, and *that* is what makes homebirth such a great thing. That pain is the only pain in this world that you get such a great result from! Someone on another board tried to compare unmedicated birth to an unmedicated tooth extraction. No comparrison!!!!

OH, and the pain is there for a very good reason. That is the way your body truly knows what to do and you can really listen to it.

[Helen White]

As far as pain goes, I've never even had a homebirth, but I labored at home the entire time last time (ran through the parking lot of the hospital as the baby was crowning). The pain was SO much more manageable at home. Being home and truly able to relax seemed to make such a difference. When we left for the hospital, I thought I was 4 cms at most (rather than dilated to 10!), because it didn't hurt any worse than 4cms in the hospital had. In the hospital I was tense and stressed, and it made the pain so much worse.

[tansyflower]

Homebirth again! My last two midwives were local but they have retired so we will have to travel a bit for this one but we don't really mind. There is no place like home

[DavinaT]

Someone on another board tried to compare unmedicated birth to an unmedicated tooth extraction.

- Now I feel as tho' I want general aneasthetic from about the third contraction :(

[littleteapot]

I've had TWO unmedicated labours (44 hours, and 4 hours) and one completely unmedicated, 20-minute wisdom tooth extraction.

The tooth extraction was about 100x worse.

For the record, I'd also repeat the 44 hour hard labour ANY TIME over the recovery from a c-section, which I had once my son was crowning after the second labour.

[CrunchyMamaToBe]

We're planning to have this baby at home. In the fishy pool (http://www.qualityinflatables.com/56493.html), maybe. We have to move out of our apartment over the summer, so I don't know where home will be yet, but no way I am going to the hospital!

[ocelotmom]

People compare birth and dental surgery not because they're comparable in terms of pain, but because they're both things you can get medication for to lessen or remove the pain. Really, it's apples and oranges. Try not to let the absolutely stupid things some people say unduly influence you :)

[Chicky2]

- Now I feel as tho' I want general aneasthetic from about the third contraction :(


Well, I guess I should have mentioned that the woman making this silly comparison had had a 'natural birth' (her words, but I would have never considered the way she did it natural) in the hospital 'not by her choice'. See, when a woman is prepared for an unmedicated labor/birth, it is soooooo different than a woman who goes to the hospital ASKING for an epidural, and finding out is was too late to get one. There is a world of difference when one is prepared, and when one is 'forced' (again, her words) into an unmedicated birth. Preparation is key, and a wonderful support team, who truly believes women are made to do this. When a laboring woman says she needs drugs, what she really needs is the right words spoken to her, not drugs. She needs encouragement, not a room full of ppl telling her, 'oh sorry, hon, you'll just have to deal w/it because now you are too late for pain meds. Gosh, it must be awful for you." The one time I said I wanted relief, I got it in the way of words. I heard, "Oh hon, you are doing so great! You are doing just perfectly,and you sure are listening to your body well! You have come so far!" That was all I needed. I only asked for relief because I was in transition, and that is a common time to feel that you cannot go on. When in reality, you are almost done! And the pushing feels SOOOOO GOOOOD!!!!!

[vespersongs]

Earth Mama,
You should dig a little deeper into homebirth in Japan! I know I've read about it recently. If I come across it again, i'll post again.

[DavinaT]

Ah I see what you mean now, Chicky2, the comparison was between and forced natural birth rather than the woman wanting it and being prepared. Yes, of course it must be an awful shock to be expecting an epidural and discovering it was too late and having to manange on pethidine and gas & air (and other appropriate pain meds) alone.

littleteapot - 44 hours in labour. Wow, you must be one strong strong lady.:thumb In hospitals here (home birth being different) labour is not allowed to continue past 14 - 18 hours, without intervention except on the express wish of the mother with the obs/gyn's consent.

A completely unmedicated, 20-minute wisdom tooth extraction :angry ?? Now that is something that is NEVER permitted here. In fact, I suspect strongly that any surgeon attempting it would be struck off. Wisdom tooth extractions here are generally done under full aneasthetic in hosptal. They MAY be done in certain rare circumtances in a dental surgery under local aneasthtic with HEAVY HEAVY sedation.

You had a c-section when your son was crowning - oooh, you must have been in a very tough situation. Hugs to you. :Hug
I guess my view on c-section was influenced also, when a close friend of mine had one electively and was recovered, tho' still a little sore in about 3 weeks and back driving after 4 and half weeks. I take it that this then is little unusual. Of course I relaise that again, an elective section is quite different from an emrgency one.

[littleteapot]

A completely unmedicated, 20-minute wisdom tooth extraction :angry ?? Now that is something that is NEVER permitted here. In fact, I suspect strongly that any surgeon attempting it would be struck off. Wisdom tooth extractions here are generally done under full aneasthetic in hosptal. They MAY be done in certain rare circumtances in a dental surgery under local aneasthtic with HEAVY HEAVY sedation.

You had a c-section when your son was crowning - oooh, you must have been in a very tough situation. Hugs to you. :Hug
I guess my view on c-section was influenced also, when a close friend of mine had one electively and was recovered, tho' still a little sore in about 3 weeks and back driving after 4 and half weeks. I take it that this then is little unusual. Of course I relaise that again, an elective section is quite different from an emrgency one.

On the tooth extraction... I'm allergic to most pain meds, and adrenaline. The dentist was very experienced and had never had a tooth take more than 30 seconds in his career. Because I couldn't have the adrenaline, the shot they gave me would wear off in under two minutes completely. They were only allowed to give me three shots in total and NOTHING else was available to me that I could have.
So, thinking that two minutes was plenty of time he went ahead and gave me two shots and then started pulling. It hurt immediately, and TERRIBLY and I started screaming. He asked me if it was pain or pressure and I was already loopy from the pain so I said, "I don't know, just keep going". He had to brace his foot on the chair and it took him almost 20 minutes to get it out. The "pain medication" they gave me wore off after about one minute. The tooth had roots an inch long and were curve inward and up underneath.
However, I didn't have a single second of pain after the tooth was out. I didn't even take a Tylenol. I suppose I paid for it all in advance!
I screamed so much the assistants at the station started crying! They came in and held my hands, but I only vaguely remember that. My mother told me about it later.

On the c-section: they didn't find out he was frank breech until he was on my perineum, despite my telling them otherwise. They "don't do" breech there, even though I was prepared to deliver him that way. I only went into the hospital because I was in preterm labour (34 weeks). It was a very, very complicated situation. It was completely unnecessary.

As for recovery, I was told I recovered "Really fast". I was having sex within two weeks and resuming normal activities by 3-4 weeks. But I certainly did NOT feel like it was a "Good" or "fast" recovery at all. Compared to my recovery with two days of hard labour? I'd do that again any day.
A few days of feeling sore vs. weeks of intense burning pain from the incision, the numbness, the violation and losing the ability to say I ever "Gave birth" (ripping my abdomen open and taking my baby out is NOT 'giving birth'. I did nothing. I was unconcious.)?
Sorry, no contest! Natural birth ALL THE WAY!

[DavinaT]

Oooh you poor thing - the wisdom tooth extraction sounds like some sort of torture.
I guess that is why they do them under full aneasthetic here (or lots of local with heavy sedation). Not sure if dentists here use adrenaline but I do know that lignocaine (injected for local aneasthetic) makes a lot of people sick (nausea). So we end up on nausea meds first, then lignocaine (5 shots for my last dental procedure - felt like my whole head was numb) , then more nausea meds.

Ooh sounds like you were in a really tough situaion with your son and the hospital just didn't listen to you. That happns here from time to time too and it makes me really :irked:
Please tho', don't feel as tho', you did nothing. You carried him, nurtured him. sustained him. He came into world thru you. Thru your body. And you continue to nurture all your babies, emtionally and psychologically as well as physically .:hug
I gues elective sections are different in the sense that there is no emergency and both the mother and surgical team are calm and prepared and unless on request, is usually done under epidural.

[littleteapot]

Ooh sounds like you were in a really tough situaion with your son and the hospital just didn't listen to you. That happns here from time to time too and it makes me really :irked:
Please tho', don't feel as tho', you did nothing. You carried him, nurtured him. sustained him. He came into world thru you. Thru your body. And you continue to nurture all your babies, emtionally and psychologically as well as physically .:hug
I gues elective sections are different in the sense that there is no emergency and both the mother and surgical team are calm and prepared and unless on request, is usually done under epidural.

I'm not saying it out of self-pity, I'm saying it because it's a fact: in a c-section you don't "give birth". The phrase "giving birth" implies that you birthed the child, but you don't. The doctors who pull him out of your stomach did. In a c-section you do nothing but lie there numbed up (or in my case, completely unconscious). You really don't do anything at all during the "birth" process.
I have given birth once, to my daughter. It was wonderful; and I'll do it again. :)

I have no idea why they put me out, I think perhaps because they felt they didn't have time to wait for an epidural to kick in. I also don't know if I'm allergic to that, but I have been put under general anesthetic before.

[Brisen]

At home :love

[leurMaman]

Littleteapot - why did you get an unmedicated wisdom tooth extraction? Were you pregnant? Just curious. Ouch!

editing - I see...found your reply. Oh my - you poor thing!

[DavinaT]

bertrandsgirl - I'm just curious, but why would a dentist do an unmedicated extraction on a pregnant lady?
I would have thought the shock and pain alone would be bad for her baby as well as herself.
Not sure about were you ladies are but here those who are pregnant get top priority for all dental treatment - includinf orthodontics (related to clacium depletion caused by pregnancy) and the state pays :)
There's another benefit to being pregnant
- the only disadvantage being that some dentists are a little unwilling to give nausea meds in the first trimester without your obs/gyn's sayso.