Circ

[Jade2561]

So - I belong to another ddc online and seriously all of the women who are having boys are going to circumsize them. I seriously have a hard time hearing about it and how "cute" circed penises are - uggh I want to throw up.

So MDC mamas expecting boys - please tell me about how excited you are to raise an intact son...I need a lift!

[writermommy]

We are expecting our fourth child and first son in July. Since we have all girls, circ is not something that has ever entered my mind. After researching it and much discussion, we have decided not to do it. I know what you mean. We have told very few people that we won't be circing him. The ones I did tell weren't thrilled with the decision. So much pressure to do it. I was talking to my SIL about the hospital and how I hate that they like to take the baby so much up here. She said they have a lot they need to do. I said, "like what?" She mentioned circ and I said we won't be doing that. She told me, "But you have to" There really is a lack of education on this issue. Many moms really do think you need to do it.

[Quagmire]

Yes, this is what makes me soo sooooo mad. Argh. Kinda weird, but I really wanted to have a boy in part so I could NOT circumcize him. I was really bummed when two friends had boys and got them to the nearest urologist as fast as possible :angry

[turtlemama77]

No one will be cutting anything off my baby, boy or girl, thank you very much!

[Still_Snarky]

I am expecting quite a load of crap from my inlaws but we won't be circing our little boy! :D He'll be the first in his daddy's family to be intact!

[bugnbean]

No way. No how. This is my third son. And people know not to even ask me any more about circumcision. Because they know how passionate I am about genital integrity for both sexes.

[Sandrine]

if we have a boy, he will be intact too just like his daddy, uncles and cousins.

[ksjhwkr]

I think my sons intact penis is VERY cute! :lol

No seriously, I got a TON of crap from my family for not circ'ing. I had to tell my Mom NOT to pull back his foreskin under any circumstances. I explained to her that it is a maintainace free penis, so all she has to do is wipe when changing his diaper!
My little brother really had a hard time with it and told me that my son would suffer sexually when he got older. I explained to him that in fact, my son's sex life would probably be better than his because he is intact!!!
Then, oh this is a funny story, my little brother and his wife were at her folks house. They were having dinner and my bro was going off on how he couldn't believe we weren't circ'ing. He just thought it was insane and that he would get teased and made fun of...blah, blah, blah, blah. Then his mil said, "Well, I think that there are men at this table who would disagree with you." Turns out his wife's dad and brothers aren't circ'd!!!! :laugh: Shut him up right away!!! Now I think that they won't circ if they have a boy!

[Red Sonja]

This new little one is a girl but I have an 18 month old DS who is intact and I wouldn't have it any other way! DH is cut but DS is not, we are breaking that cycle in our family. :)

I hear ya about DDCs on other boards, it came up on one I am on. I had to take a break from another board because the topic got me so riled up. Ain't NOBODY cutting up any of my babies, no way no how.

[beautyful]

I'm having a girl, but this has come up on another DDC I'm in. :( It's making me so sad. But I'm glad to see the responses here!

Quagmire - that's something I thought about when we found out we're having another girl.

[bass chick]

First of all, I used to work in a medical building pharmacy...and every Tuesday we would hear newborn after newborn leaving the building crying so frantically. One of my co-workers explained to me that Tuesday's was one of the doctor's days for performing circs. It made me sad. Who would want to inflict such pain on your brand new baby? Just like those stupid people who peirce their baby girls ears. Makes me sooooo mad. With ds#1, dh thought he should be circ'd, but I told him that I was not going to look into it or go with him to get it done since I couldn't bear the thought of doing that to ds. It just seems so unnatural to hurt your baby on purpose. Because our health region discourages it, dh never bothered to look into it. We had discovered that 80% of boys born in our region were not circumsized. And besides, there are no reasons anymore to go ahead with it. If ds changes his mind when he is older, he can go ahead and get it done. It can be his decision.

[sewaneecook]

Luckily DH isn't circ'd, so our little one will be untouched. Living in the south, we'll be looked at as being weird, but I want what is best for my boy (if he is a boy!). My sister has 3 boys and the first one they decided to circ and he's the only one who has had any penis issues or problems.

BTW, as for being older and a circ'd penis not being as fulfilling ... a circ'd penis is MORE sensative b/c it hasn't had to deal with constant rubbing against underwear and pants ... As for fulfillment for the woman, another woman would have to answer that one, DH's is all I've ever known! :lol

Jade2561 - maybe you could take this opportunity to educate the other women on your other DDC. Or just come here for solace when you need it!

[lotus.blossom]

I'm very proud that my son will be intact. It is a very sensitive subject for my dh, because he wishes he never got circ'ed and now he will be able to sort of right the wrong through his son. Before we knew we were having a boy I had decided to do research as I was on the fence, but the one thing that made it very clear to me was- this is my sons penis and it is my sons decision. I will not be preventatively cutting off his forekin but if he decides to do it for whatever reason later on then I fully support him!

[turtlemama77]

My dh was circ'ed when he was five because he was starting school and his parents worried that he wouldn't fit in when he got older. dh vividly remembers it, so when we had the circ or not circ discussion, it was a pretty short discussion! I shared some info with dh about circ'ing and asked, "We don't have to do that, do we?" His answer was an adament "NO!" And that's that!

[LolaEight]

My son will be uncircumsized just like his big brother!!!

I'm just the opposite of those women. I, too, think uncirced is cute!!! When I change diapers at the church now, I get sad seeing all those cut penises. They look so weird to me now!!

So I'm proud to be having another all natural boy!!!

We tell people, when they ask of course, "We leave them the way God made 'em!!!!"

[ma_Donna]

I think my intact son is pretty cute, too.

My DH aso said that he wished he hadn't been circed. He said that it is our child's decision, not ours.

You're in good company here.

[MsGrizzle]

Well, I'm totally ashamed to admit my first son IS circ'd. I spent soooo much time researching about everything else, and frankly, this was never really a thought. I did regret it immediately but dh didn't. He is pretty in-line with all my beliefs but we differ on that one. Now we just found out we are having another son and I told him he will be left alone - and since I'm planning a home birth, this will be even easier. DH is NOT happy about it. I think he is worried about him being made fun of in the school locker room. The area here is not too diverse so I'd be willing to bet that most kids are circ'd. I'm not sure what the family will think, but since they are already going to think I'm a complete wack job for having a home birth (they won't be told until after), the whole circ thing will probably be an afterthought!

And the reason I'm ONLY reading mdc this time is because of issues just like this. I was pretty active on BabyCenter for the first ds and I got sooo depressed and couldn't sleep when the babies were born and it was all about lots and lots of Babywise and CIO. I decided not to return this time!

[fenwickmama]

our little guatling is intact and perfect...if this babe is a boy, he'll be intact too!

[jinkel]

Dh is intact, ds1 is whole and perfect, and ds2 will be, too. :D I wouldn't circ anymore than I'd cut off my daughter's clitoris. It's all genital mutilation to me.

When I was pg with ds, I was on other boards (hadn't found MDC yet), and it was really just too frustrating/stressful - I don't really have much in common with most of the mamas on the mainstream boards. And while it can be the perfect opportunity to educate the masses and make some converts along the way, or even a perfect platform for a spirited debate (which *can* be fun), most of the time, I wanna go to a place where I can share my thoughts with people who "get me", YK? So once I found MDC, I've never even had the slightest urge to look for another board. This is my one and only, baybee! :wink

[luckymama]

my son is lovely intact.

my next son will remain intact.

i had such a hard time with my mainstream ddc years ago, and with my dh as well. my dh's argument to circ was, "well, why not? people do it all the time!" but once my ped sister and die-hard surgeon ("if you CAN cut it, you SHOULD cut it") father weighed in with their opinions that there were more benefits to boys remaining intact and many drawbacks to circ'ing, my dh came around. now, he argues against circ.

and as if my conviction were not enough, as our ddc boys were born, i then had to bite my tongue while mamas complained about their now-circ'd babies penis care and how worried they were about the pain and the scar and chance of infection, etc., etc., etc. sigh.

intact penis - easy ... lovely ... the way it's supposed to be. :love

[JoyofBirth]

I don't have any boys. We're woorking on girl #2 so I can't talk about it froom a parent's standpoint. But my dh is not circed. He was a preemie and it just never got done. Lucky me! I can definitely say the sex is different. He is way more sensitive, which is actually kinda nice, but I won't get into that. And as far as getting teased, my dh says that he never really had that problem. He also said that if he had, he would have questioned why those boys were looking at his parts anyway. They need to mind their own business. A friend who has an intact son that's about 8 came home from school one day and said another boy saw him in the bathroom and asked him why he looked different. So he asked his mom about it when he got home and she explained it. He said he was going to back and tell the boy that and remember it in the future.
And I agree that the look of an intact penis is better.

[momsmyjob]

Not here..all 4 of my boys are intact :love and this one will be too

[puddleduck]

In the UK circ is not common - i've never even seen a circ'd penis!

One of my friends who is pregnant said she would have her baby circ'd if it was a boy - because her parents are muslim (even though she does not practice) - well i was horrified - and sent her and her husband lots of links and told them exactly what they would be doing - they have changed their minds now!!

[aydensmama]

It may be my preggo emotions, but my heart swelled and I fought back the tears reading "how "cute" circed penises are". How is it cute to cut off what is meant to be there?

My second son will be adorable and intact just like his brother, father, uncle, grandfather, great uncle, great grandfather, cousins. We are from the south and a strong family on my hubby's side. I am so grateful that the right decision was a must for this family. They believe you do not cut little boys!

If only everyone else would just do the right thing....

[JennInSeattle]

My son is also intact. I actually had to bribe my husband to do this with $500 but whatever - it's totally worth it!

I see moms of circ'd sons having to push out their little penis and wipe all around it, I don't think it looks attractive and I don't think it looks easier (at all).

My mom wasn't thrilled with my decision but she got used to it, my grandparents had a few things to say the first week after we had him and didn't circ but as soon as we got out of the range of circ'ing I was totally left alone about it - no one has said a word since and I'm glad. :)

I think it was a great decision, he's had no infections and no problems down there. He didn't have to have unneccesary surgery that he couldn't understand at a tiny age and he has the foreskin that God gave him. It's just not for me to take away. When he's MUCH older, if he would like the surgery I will definitely pay for it and I will be the one explaining to him why he's not circ'd should he ever ask. :throb

[AidansMommy1012]

No one in my family or DH's family is circumsized, so fortunately there have been no questions and no criticisms. DH's family even has a story about FIL standing guard over DH's bassinet in the hospital 24-7, turning away nurses (they do the circ'ing in the hospital here). And our awesome family practitioner, who delivered DS1 and is now his pediatrician, taped a big notecard with "DO NOT CIRC!" written in bold black marker to his bassinet at the hospital. DH is very vocal about his anti-circ status. My best friend and her husband found out they're having a little boy as well, and his first question (so much for tact, but that's DH for you) was "You're not going to cut him, are you?" And he was actually the one (I helped, but was waay outdone by DH) who tracked down all the links and articles and resources against circumsizing for them. So they aren't doing it now. :D He may not always have the greatest social skills, but the man can take care of business.
I was talking to my mother a little while ago, and she mentioned that my 16 year old brother wishes he was circ'ed because he's embarressed (he's an athlete and spends a lot of time in locker rooms). He's kind of a sensitive guy, anyway. So I casually engaged him in a convo about why DH and I didn't circ, all the things that can go wrong with circ'ing, and the stats that non-circ'ing is actually slowly on the rise. Hoping that helped relieve some of the embarressment. Or I could possibly have made it worse by being a crazy big sister talking about penises to my teenage little brother.:lol I'm sure he'd fall over and die if he know I was posting this.

[tsk_mum]

So - I belong to another ddc online and seriously all of the women who are having boys are going to circumsize them. I seriously have a hard time hearing about it and how "cute" circed penises are - uggh I want to throw up.



I belong to another group too & that was almost all of their reasonings behind it!
OH PLEASE!!!!!!!!!! Some reasoning, HUH!?!? :shake

[Red Sonja]

Or I could possibly have made it worse by being a crazy big sister talking about penises to my teenage little brother.:lol
Hey, that's me! Only my little brother (19) is circ'd. When DS was a few months old I called my brother back during a diaper change and brought up circ. It turns out that he is anti-circ (did some reading about it after he learned about FGM) and thinks it is cruel, wouldn't circ his future kids. Now hopefully his flighty little fiance (who giggles at the word penis) feels the same way.

[cjcolorado]

I, surprisingly, had to do a little bit of convincing with my DH (who is circ'ed). His dad is a urologist and 'generally' recommends it, but doesn't overly advocate it. Thankfully, my SIL is married to a European who is not circ'ed and they did not circ their son (both of them are also in the medical profession and my FIL respects their opinions on medical stuff much more than mine since I'm the lone liberal artsy person in the family!) So, I can thank them for paving the way with him, should we have any boys. I can't see my parents caring one way or another. I've also never really gotten the whole locker room argument...what on earth are guys doing staring at each other and commenting on private parts, anyway? Weird.

[PancakeGoddess]

Cori, my oldest boy (11) is also circumcised. My other two are not and the one I'm carrying won't be either. It was very hard with my spouse, during that second pregnancy. I was not going to waver, and neither was he. We eventually worked it out and he now agrees it's a terrible idea, but it was very difficult. It's a major regret, but I try not to wallow. I don't feel ashamed, just naive and sorry.

And I don't really think penises are cute at all, but if there are any cute penises, it's baby penises :-) Either way - I thought all my babies were cute from head to toe, incl the first.

[ksjhwkr]

Or I could possibly have made it worse by being a crazy big sister talking about penises to my teenage little brother.:lol I'm sure he'd fall over and die if he know I was posting this.

:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

[sewaneecook]

Why is it that the surgically altered penis is considered the "norm" and the guys who are whole are the ones who "get made fun of?" I've never understood this logic. Aren't 50% of American boys circ'd? That means that it's half for both sides, one shouldn't be more common than the other. Of course, I come from a family who supports non-circ (both mine and DH's), so my viewpoint is very biased here.

[homemademomma]

well, i guess i'll be the voice of dissent here. . .






just kidding. yuck. and for the record, my ds' penis is super cute!!!!!