Midwife interview questions...

[Ooey]

I am having my first midwife interview this week, and wondering if there are any special questions I may want to ask...

I think I have all the basics coverd like what is your experience, your background, what inteventions do you do, what emergency situations have you had to deal with and yada yada yada... But I am wondering if there are any really special quesions, ones that most prospective clients don't think of asking at first? I am getting pretty close to my due date, and would like to be able to build a good relationship with the mw rather quickly, so any questions that could help with that process would be helpful.

Also, I know this may sound stupid, but I am kind of nervous about the interview. I am ftm, and my pregnancy has been pretty smooth and easy, and I am a really laid back and open minded kind of person, so ther is really no reason for a midwife not to want to take me on as a client, but I am still worried about that happening. :( I guess it stems from feeling like I don't really know what to expect out of birth at all, but I guess every first time mom probably feels that way. Also, I have been on Zofran, which I feel bad about as I am usually an anti-drug kind of person, but it has been the only thing that has helped me stop puking every day, I guess I am worried about being juged for that.

Sorry that was kind of a little rant *felt good to get that out* anyway, some suggestions about interview questions would be greatly appriciated :o

[courtenay_e]

How have you prepared for child birth? Have you taken any classes (Bradley, Hypnobirthing, etc)? Be sure that your midwife is familliar with and supports the behavior of a woman in labor who has taken your specific classes. If she doesn't understand/agree with the methods you use, it could cause tension/problems that you really don't need during labor.

When will she come, and when she hangs up the phone with you, how long will it take her to get there? Rather than sleeping when we could, we waited for our midwife for several hours in the middle of the night so that her knocking wouldn't wake our toddler. It should have taken her an hour or so to get there...maybe an hour and a half for "wake-up" time added in. It was almost four hours after the call before she got there.

Do you plan to birth in bed? Do you have a favorite side? Does she care which side you birth on? I found this disagreement to get me a little off stride, as it took place during labor.

Does she have experience in water birth? IF you labor in a tub and want to stay, does she have the experience to let you do that?

What are her "limits" on exhaustion?

Will she sit and make you tell her when every contraction starts and ends, so that it can be charted, or is she experienced enough to let you labor with the occaisional listen to the baby's heart tones? This "reporting" can get annoying, if you're a "relaxer" during contractions.

Does she have preferred positions for birth? This is an important one if you want to get in any position you please. The correct answer would be something along the lines of, "however you end up is fine."

How does she handle sleep deprivation and slow labors? Does she get cranky, or need a nap, or coffee? Honestly answered, this question can really let you know what kind of midwife you're dealing with.

How does she handle a woman who is losing her composure due to increased intensity/back labor, etc. Ask for a visual and verbal demonstration. This may leave her at a loss for a moment. I don't like to be bullied, but some people actually need a "strong arm" to bring them back to focus. You'll know which one you are...and when she answers this, you'll know a little better whether you'll be a good fit.

Remember this, you're interviewing each other. The answers to some of these questions may lead BOTH of you to believe that you're not a good fit...but the midwifery/natural birth community is rather close knit, and many of us know that we have different styles. You may (and probably would, if you ask)be able to get a referral for the style of care you're looking for, if the two of you just aren't a good fit. Trust me, she will feel more comfortable sending you to one of her friends, than not having the absolute best fit for both of you! On the other hand, you may love one another from the first handshake.

Good luck in your search. What an exciting time!

[teachinmaof3]

Ask for references and check them. :thumb

[sapphire_chan]

Unless my views on birth change drastically between now and when we start looking for a midwife, I want one who can answer the "what if something goes wrong?" questions of my dh while allowing me to basically birth unassisted. So I'm going to let him handle the questions about how she'd respond to an emergency. I on the other hand, plan to ask things like:
Describe a typical birth you've attended, what did you like about that experience?
Tell me your thoughts on vaginal exams.
Have you read Ina May Gaskin's book "Spiritual Midwifery"? What do you feel are some of the positive and negative aspects of her protrayal of midwifery?

Basically, I want a midwife who of her own accord and with no prompting from me espouses an non-interventionist approach. I've read too many stories (seriously 3 is too many) of midwives to talked a good line, but when push came to PUSH harder! they were bullies. After I find a midwife with a good basic philosophy, then I'll discuss my actual goals for the birth. But I want someone who can actually help me have the birth I want, not someone who just says all the right things.

Okay, so I really want Pamamidwife as a midwife, but she lives 2000 miles away.:( :lol