March Homebirthers Roll Call!

[paisley]

Being as this is MDC and all there have to be a few of us planning to birth at home. ;) Come on in and introduce yourselves and let's chat!

[paisley]

Ok, I'll start. :innocent Ds was born all natural in a hospital birth center with a CNM and doula. It was a great experience but now that we are more settled house-wise, I am really looking forward to a home water birth this time around.

The MW I am planning to see was apprenticing with the CNM I saw with ds and I just love her. She is so excited that I am finally pregnant that she set an appointment to see me at 6 weeks rather than the regular 9 (I have had a couple early m/c's so we've had a couple of false starts together already). That means my first appt is in 2 weeks - thus making this pregnancy seem like it is going way too fast already! :lol

I'm looking forward to hearing form the rest of you! :)

[Arwyn]

Me me me me meeeeeeeeee! The March due month actually pushes off my plans for a year, otherwise I'd be gearing up to apply to midwifery school this fall, so there was no question this would be a planned homebirth baby! :lol

Have you started contacting midwives yet? Already have one lined up? Waiting until 2nd trimester? I live in Portland, OR, which has a glut of midwives (and yes, this is where I'm planning on practicing! :lol), but the favorites fill up fast, but I want to interview a bunch, so... :dizzy: Haven't quite figured it all out yet!

And the timeline is complicated by my being in another state next week, otherwise I'd probably start calling around then. When I get back, though, probably...

[Arwyn]

Oops, crossposted! Anyway, this is our first, and we're planning a home probably water birth (still looking for the deepest tub we can find and afford - I'm both tall and large, and those 24" pools just seem so shallow!). I've trained as a labor doula, am an aspiring midwife, and we're looking for a CPM or other DEM - kinda a no-brainer for us. :love

[Astromom]

Paisley, congrats! :balloons How great that you get to do your next at home! It's a wonderful experience!! :) So sorry about your losses. :(

Arwyn congrats to you too! :balloons That's so awesome that you are planning on doing midwifery school! As far as tubs go, I don't really know much but I'm tallish (5'7") and I loved the Aquadoula.

As for me, I'll be definitely having my second homebirth. The question is whether it will be a planned unassisted. I had a 45 minute labor (that I recognized) with my DD, and my midwife made it just in time to watch my DH catch her. :lol This time around, we moved and the nearest midwives are 45 minutes away -- except ONE, who made me cry when I talked to her on the phone!! :o And I'm not a cryer, darn pregnancy hormones. Anyway, do I pay someone 3000$ to probably not be at my birth, or do I just learn everything I can and go unassisted? Or do I go with the nearby midwife who I apparently have a personality conflict with? Ugh. I'm going to meet with her again just in case she was just having a lousy day...

[paisley]

Hi Astromom! Congrats to you too! :jumpers:

I can't believe she made you cry on the phone! :nono Maybe she will be better in person because if you two hit it off it sounds like that would be a good answer to your dilemma. Props to you for considering unassisted! I feel like it's not quite the right choice for me but I have a lot of respect and admiration for those who go UC. :thumb Good thing we get another 8 months to sort these details all out, right?

[kdf]

I am going to have my second homebirth. I just found out I am pg today so I haven't started calling midwives yet. Probably tomorrow I will. I am so excited about doing this again. I loved having my ds at home. And so happy this time I have other mamas to talk to about it.

[Full Heart]

Planning my 6th homebirth (had 1 transfer). Have to find a new midwife this time. If anyone is in the Phoenix area and has recs let me know!

[tika]

My DD was born via c-section due to failed induction. Going to avoid all intervention this time and birth at home for my best chances of a safe VBAC.

I've known I am pregnant for about a week and a half, no rush to call the midwife. I'm enjoying the peacefulness of just being pregnant and not worrying about anything else.

I have a great support system lined up, just haven't confirmed the midwife. We are very excited!

[Alisa]

I am planning a home birth and am soooo excited about it. Our twins were born in a hospital and I'm just looking forward to the intimacy and privacy of having a homebirth. There are very few midwives in our area so I already called one and we are going to meet on the 17th.

I'm so excited about this prospect. It just feels so right for our family :jumpers: .

[Astromom]

Paisley, thanks! You are so right about having a lot of time to sort it out. Exactly what I was just saying to DH. She seemed kind of spacey, like she wasn't listening to me. I got that feeling many times in the conversation, but when she told me her price and I said "Oh, that's more than I expected because another midwife quoted about 1000$ less than that a few months ago," she replied by telling me I was irresponsible for having a child without thinking about the cost. :irked: If only she could see the excel sheets I've written up in the past year figuring out all the finances involved!! :lol Oh my gosh I miss my midwife from California....

kdf, I hope you were able to talk to some midwives yesterday! You'll have to let us know how it went.

Full Heart, I hope you have no problems finding a great midwife.

tika, yay that you have a great support system set up for your VBAC! That's wonderful!!

Alisa, you're right, it is so intimate and private... it's just great. I can't imagine doing it any other way now.

So, I am starting to lean more toward unassisted as a preference instead of a last resort. My SIL (a nurse) was telling me she would come and stay here with me for a week so she could be here with me when I go into labor, and she would check the heartrates, and she would "only do vaginal exams if necessary", and etc, etc... and it made me stop and think. I had the most peaceful, beautiful experience with DD's birth.. no midwives, no dopplers, no checks, no stress, no nervousness. Yes, we were happy to see our last midwife walk in our house at the last minute as DH was catching her because we weren't expecting to do it alone. But now I'm not sure I even want the low interventions of a midwife. Anyway, yes, lots of time to think it over!

[paisley]

...but when she told me her price and I said "Oh, that's more than I expected because another midwife quoted about 1000$ less than that a few months ago," she replied by telling me I was irresponsible for having a child without thinking about the cost. :irked:
WHAT??? Nevermind what I said before about meeting her in person! And hello, doesn't the fact that you got quotes from other MWs show that you have been thinking this out? :angry

Your SIL sounds like an awesome resource. I would be thinking that UC looked really good in your situation.

Oh and where were you in CA? I'm on the central cost. :)

[Full Heart]

So how do you decide which midwife? I have talked to one on the phone. I really like her. I am meeting another in person on the 6th, I know her already shes been at 2 of my previous births. And setting up a phone interview with another midwife for after the 9th. Then I have to choose. How will I know? When I choose before it never occured me that I could actually interview people like for a job. Kinda just figured you just picked one and went with it :lol . Of course it will be made very easy if one or both of these last 2 won't take me because I am always post dates. But in case I have 3 to choose from, How do I choose?

[tika]

I would base my decision on two important things:

1) Who do you feel most comfortable with?

2) Who do you think will give you the birth that you want? What kind of interventions are you willing or not willing to accept and who is likely to be more comfortable with your decisions and not pressure you?

Yes, definitely ask them how they feel about postdates.

Another suggestion, perhaps you could "pad" your due date a little bit to give you more time without having pressure? Perhaps by only a day or a few days.

As for me, I really don't have many options if I want an HBAC. I have one midwife option or to go unassisted if I want a home birth and to avoid another unnecessary cesarean. I wish I had several to choose from! You are so fortunate.

[kdf]

There are four mw clinics where I live so I have to call all four and do an intake with them. Then the mw in the clinis meet and decide if they are going to take me. So I have only had one clinic call me back which was the one that I had last time. So the chances are good that I will get her again b/c I am a repeat client and I am having a homebirth. But the clinic told me that I should start prenatal care with a dr. I am not doing that b/c I refuse to have a dr or the baby in the hospital. I will have to figure something out if that is the case.

Good luck to everyone else trying to find a mw.

[Full Heart]

I would base my decision on two important things:

1) Who do you feel most comfortable with?

2) Who do you think will give you the birth that you want? What kind of interventions are you willing or not willing to accept and who is likely to be more comfortable with your decisions and not pressure you?

Yes, definitely ask them how they feel about postdates.

Another suggestion, perhaps you could "pad" your due date a little bit to give you more time without having pressure? Perhaps by only a day or a few days.

As for me, I really don't have many options if I want an HBAC. I have one midwife option or to go unassisted if I want a home birth and to avoid another unnecessary cesarean. I wish I had several to choose from! You are so fortunate.

I actually probably would have more to choose from, there are alot of mws here. Like 20! Last pg I padded my edd easily since I did have a pp af and it looked like I delivered 2 weeks early. That was sooooo nice. No pressure. But this time it will be very difficult to pad my edd. My lmp was May 6th, I didn't have EWCM till June 5-7th. So if I went with my LMP I would have an edd in Feb - which would make me a whole mos past my edd! I did however have bleeding the 19-23 so I can lie say I had af and would give me a edd of March 26 so I would again deliver early. But then we have the whole problem of measuring huge and hearing hb way early etc. So I am just going with my O days. Later on if we have to we can change my edd to reflect the bleeding I had.

Since I am a vetern hber I know there are some things I am just not willing to bend on so if a mw just can't see around them I will just not choose her. In the end I just hope I make the right decision.

[coffeetastesgood]

I'm considering homebirth. My last two births were straightforward. (1st son, 12 hours start to finish, 2nd son, 4 hours start to finish). No complications. I would rather stay at home than have the drive to the hospital I had last time!

[Astromom]

WHAT??? Nevermind what I said before about meeting her in person! And hello, doesn't the fact that you got quotes from other MWs show that you have been thinking this out? :angry

Your SIL sounds like an awesome resource. I would be thinking that UC looked really good in your situation.

Oh and where were you in CA? I'm on the central cost. :)

Yeah, it was a really weird conversation with that woman.

My SIL definitely IS an awesome resource -- she's had several homebirths herself, and she is an amazing source of knowledge. If she wanted to be here as my friend, that would be fine. However, the thought of her here being a medical professional and worrying about me doesn't appeal to me so much.

I was in the bay area, south of San Francisco. (If anyone's there, I can recommend the best midwife!) We were only there a few years, and I miss California a lot -- but we went back east to be near family, and we could actually buy a house where we are now. Are you from there originally?

[Astromom]

But the clinic told me that I should start prenatal care with a dr. I am not doing that b/c I refuse to have a dr or the baby in the hospital. I will have to figure something out if that is the case.



kdf, do you know why they are wanting you to start prenatal care with a dr? It's the same clinic you went to before, right? Did they ask you to do that last time too?

[lunadoula]

We're planning a homebirth. Very exciting! :) One of the doulas I know also owns and rents waterbirth tubs in the area, which is really nice! She comes and sets the up, then comes and drains and takes it all away after the birth. We have our first visit with the midwife on the 17th.

[cinnamonamon]

I'm hoping to hba2c...there is a midwife near me who does them, so I *think* I'm set, although I've not contacted her yet. Ds1 I trusted a dr. and ended up strapped to a bed w/ pitocin because I had a small leak, but no real contractions...20 hours later they discovered -- oops; he's breech -- almost transverse! No wonder no progress -- nothing was pressing on my cervix.

Ds2 was an attempted hbac, but my midwife was a bit antsy as my progress was slow (okay... she didn't get anxious until day 2, lol). But I should have let my body rest when it wanted to (I could have probably slept overnight??). Instead I listened to her and walked around stomping, etc. taking mild herbs/homeopathics, etc. And eventually let her break my water. Turns out he was posterior & had his head cocked to a wierd angle in/at my c/s scar. So with the water broke I ended up with his head stuck there...c/s #2. :(

I'm really nervous, but there's no way I'm just going to sit back for an elective c/s. I'm prayin' already!

[Mindi22]

I'd love to have a homebirth, but DH is a bit skittish about it. I did get him to agree to at least talk to someone who does them so we know if it will fit with us. I'm a chiropractor, and all for less intervention and no drugs, he's a little more medically minded (not a lot, just more traditional in some ways, I guess). I think he's also concerned about what his role will be at home, feeling like he has to host the event (which, ummmm, I'm doing all the work, honey!) and feeling split and not able to just support me. We'll see, though. If we do something else, we definitly want to check out the birthing center at the hospital down the street. We've heard great things, and they do have water birthing tubs there, so at least I'll get that if not at home.

I made my first appt with the CNM's that I saw during my last pregnancy. I figure there's plenty of time to change providers and change course, but it's difficult to get that first appointment, so I'm glad it's at least on the books. I'll keep you all posted as we decide. It's nice to hear others planning a homebirth - I know I'm not quite so crazy. :)

-Mindi

[lotusdebi]

We're planning a home waterbirth. I still have to interview the midwives, but there are only two to consider, so that shouldn't take long.
My son was born at a birth center, and I just feel like I'm ready for the next step. :D
My biggest concern is keeping my house clean in those final weeks. I have a hard enough time cleaning when I'm NOT pregnant!

[shalena]

We're also planning a home water birth. Like, Debi, I had my first son at a birth center but would like to have our next baby at home. We're moving into a rambler next month and I'm already planning on where we'll set up the pool! :lol
I have a great set of midwives who I'm really looking forward to seeing again.

[lotusdebi]

:wave Hi, shalena! Nice to see you! Congratulations! :balloons

[shalena]

You too! I'm glad I'm seeing a few familar faces here!

[chemE_momE]

I am so excited about having a homebirth this time! I had my DD at a stand-alone birthing center. It was great but the 45 minute drive there during transition was not my idea of fun. I did all the work myself with no meds, so I figure why go somewhere for that? I found a midwifery group much closer, and they do homebirths. I’d like to try a water birth this time, too. I'm so excited!! :lol

[PinksMommy]

Hi all! Just thought I'd bump this up, I'm planning on homebirth this time around. My birth with DD was a standard high-intervention hospital birth: pitocin, epidural, flat on my back in the bed, coached pushing.
I am really excited to have a comfortable relaxed natural birth without all of the high drama that doctors pump you up with.

[kdf]

kdf, do you know why they are wanting you to start prenatal care with a dr? It's the same clinic you went to before, right? Did they ask you to do that last time too?

Astromom, I don't know I think they said b/c if I don't get a MW then it is easier if I have already started with a dr and I don't have to worry about finding one later. Yes they asked me to do the same thing last time. And actually last time all the clinics said no until my SIL called one and begged them to take me. They said they would only if I would have a homebirth (which is what I wanted but ppl were putting doubts in my head right before I called all the clinics)
Anyways so I had a appt made with a dr and had to cancel it when I got my MW. So this time I will just wait to see if I get one. My SIL has her MW's number and said she would call her if I don't get one. I am really not worried b/c I am a repeat client and I am having a homebirth.

[FSUBecca]

Hi all. Just found out we are expecting #3, and planning our second homebirth. Leaning towards a UC this time. Looking forward to chatting with you all over the coming months!

[kerikadi]

This will be baby #5 and our 3rd homebirth :thumb

Keri

[Astromom]

lunadoula, ooh, that's cool that she'll set up and break down the tub for you! We had to do that ourselves last time (ok, dh had to do it himself, I actually wasn't involved with that part. :) ) Your first visit w/ the mw is getting close -- I hope it's a good one!

cinnamonamon, that's so wonderful that there is a midwife near you who will do HBA2Cs!! Hope you are able to arrange it with her!

Mindi22, my dh was also originally skittish about HB, but now talking to him you'd never know it! I don't think he ever really questioned his role, because I had him read Bradley books right from the beginning so he knew that he would be my coach and nothing else. But he was nervous about something going wrong, but he came around :). It's a good idea that you're going to have your dh talk to someone who does HB.

Debi, I don't think the midwives are going to care if your house is a bit cluttered! :) I seem to remember getting sort of an energy burst toward the end anyway... I remember cleaning out the cars even!

shalena, so exciting that you'll get to do your next as a HB!

chemE_momE, how great that you found a near-by group of HB mws! Yeah, the 45 minute drive during transition does not sound fun!

PinksMommy, so excited for you that you'll be doing a HB this time -- it's such a wonderful experience!

Rebecca, I am thinking about UC myself, but the pressure I will have from everyone not to do that will probably overwhelm me. :(

Keri, congratulations! So glad you could join us!

kdf -- Oh, I see. It sounds like it will all work out fine! That's good!

Well, as for me... I did meet with the midwife (the one that I didn't jive well with on the phone) and hmmm, big shocker, we didn't click in person either. Oh well. She seemed nicer than my first impression, but I just didn't get good vibes. I did meet with a midwife group that is about 45 minutes away (scary considering my previous 45 minute labor) but the cool thing is that her assistant is only a couple miles away from me! And we did really click with them! But the past couple weeks I have been really warming to the idea of UC.... so, not sure yet, but I love that I feel like I have options again. :)

[Arwyn]

KERI!!!! :w So very happy to see you here! :love

Jenny - I'm really glad it looks like things are looking up for you! Let us know how your thinking about UC goes - as DP said, even with our first, we're about this close to wanting UC. :D But here in Portland we have a plethora of midwives, so we're looking for someone very hands-on in pregnancy (in terms of fetal positioning, massage, nutrition - very relationship oriented) and very hands OFF in birth - knitting in a corner exuding confidence and trust would be my ideal, while DP and I get down to business. :love But I also want someone there in case in the moment I find I need something more, in terms of in-my-face support. Does that make sense?

[Mavournin]

I called my homebirth midwives yesterday. It will be my second birth with them. (Third overall - first baby was born at a freestanding BC) Now I just need to figure out how to pay them! :lol

I have been seeing a gynecologist very regularly over the past two years for severe ovarian cyst problems, including surgery. I love my Doctor - she actually treats patients like they are humans, but there is no way I could birth with that practice. She called yesterday with congrats (I had gone into the office for a beta) and her "next step" talk - 1st trimester u/s, more betas etc. Nope. I just can't, I know where my comfort level lies and it's just not there. I refuse to submit to a battery of tests that will only make my life harder in the end - like GBS.

[Astromom]

Jenny - I'm really glad it looks like things are looking up for you! Let us know how your thinking about UC goes - as DP said, even with our first, we're about this close to wanting UC. :D But here in Portland we have a plethora of midwives, so we're looking for someone very hands-on in pregnancy (in terms of fetal positioning, massage, nutrition - very relationship oriented) and very hands OFF in birth - knitting in a corner exuding confidence and trust would be my ideal, while DP and I get down to business. :love But I also want someone there in case in the moment I find I need something more, in terms of in-my-face support. Does that make sense?

Exactly! You put that really well. I DO really want the hands-on prenatal care, but very hands-off labor. I understand exactly, and I feel like that is probably the way I will go. If I went UC, I would get HMO OB "free" prenatal care (ya get what you pay for!) And I know that just would be lame. So, I'm thinking maybe the midwife fee is worth it for the awesome care, even if they do miss the birth! :lol

[MsElle07]

I'll be having an HB with this baby. My first was a hospital birth, my second at a birth center, and I've always said if I had a third, the babe would be born at home. No MW yet -- lots of research to do!

[lunadoula]

Jenny - Yeah, it's great (the tub person). She started a business after doing the whole ordering-a-tub thing and experiencing the joy of giving birth and then waking up in the morning to deal with a tub of nasty, bloody water :lol . So she decided to buy 2-3 tubs and offer it as a service. It's pretty affordable too.

Midwife visit got moved a week later (from this coming Monday to next Monday) b/c she has a lot of moms now who are newly postpartum that she needs to do home visits with that day. Of course I was sad to wait another week, but you can't really argue that the new mamas and babes need her a little big more. :) DW is out of town this weekend so she'll probably be exhausted and brain-dead this Monday when she gets back anyways, haha!

[Sunshinesmiles22]

I'm new here, but we're planning a home birth. My mom's best friend delivered me, and will now deliver our baby!!
It's so important to have a comfortable relationship with your midwife, so I'd definitely recommend that to anyone...

Any other young ones? (I'm 23)

[Arwyn]

:w Sunshinesmiles22! I'm 24, will be 25 when the little one comes.

[nznats]

Well I am having a UBAC so that counts as a homebirth :) This is my second baby, my daughter is currently 28 months. Looking forward to the coming months this pregnancy is so different to my other pregnancies.
ETA: I am 22 :D

[Arwyn]

UBAC definitely counts! That's so cool. :) :w Natalie!

[bemommy]

Hoping to homebirth this time around. I had a hospital birth with DD. Even with the pitocin it was fine. My OB was very good about letting me do want I wanted (after progressing far enough). No epidural, lots of walking around at the end. I just hated the whole hospital experience. I wanted out of there pronto.

I had thought I might do a birth center for #2, but then the closest birth center closed about a year ago. So as soon as we feel secure in this pregnancy I'm going to start pushing for a homebirth. I did talk with a midwife a couple of months ago (the last time I thought I was pregnant before the m/c) and on the phone I really really liked her. She was wonderful in what was a pretty dark time.

I know that DH will worry about the cost and my mom will want me to get concurrent care with someone. But I really really want a homebirth. At 34 this my be my last chance.

[PinksMommy]

Another young mama here, 21 about to turn 22 on August 18th.

DH is starting to have a lot of doubts about a homebirth....we've got plenty of time to talk about it and work it out. I'm open to considering a birth center, but I think that we really would be fine with a homebirth.

[Sunshinesmiles22]

:w Sunshinesmiles22! I'm 24, will be 25 when the little one comes.
Thanks, Arwyn. I'll be just shy of 24 when our little one comes! (though my mom insists we'll have an April baby! ha ha

[MandyWelch]

My answer is "I don't know yet." With the way my last birth went, I'll say that I'm pretty sure I'll be at home. My first 2 were planned hospital births. My last one was supposed to be as well but I planned to labor at home as long as I was comfortable and then head to the hospital for the actual birth. Well I used hypnobirthing and got to the point where my ctx's were 2 min apart and lasting a minute and a half before I realized it was time to go. We had to wait until someone got to our house to watch the other sleeping children (our neighbor) and we booked it to the hospital. We got there at 5:47 and ds was born at 5:50. I really, really, really don't want to do that ride again!!! He was crowning for half the ride (which took about 15 minutes).

DH is not too keen on HB, but understands where I am coming from. HE told me that it's me going through the pregnancy and birth so it's ultimately my decision. I just don't know if I could justify spending the $$ on a midwife when I know I'll want to be by myself anyway and I'm an RN in an NICU where I attend high-risk deliveries all the time so I know what to do if something goes wrong. I just keep thinking that I would never forgive myself if something happened to me (Like uncontrollable bleeding) that renders me unconscious and unable to help the baby.

I guess I still have alot of research to do.

Mandy

[LuvMyLittles]

Barring anything crazy, I will be having number three here at home. First dd (who is 14 now) was a hospital birth and although I managed to keep the delivery free of interventions, I had to fight for the whole time I was in labor. Then they kept trying to tell me that my over 8 pound, 41 week gestated baby was premature and needed all kinds of tests - huh? I was only 18 and exhausted so it wasn't until I walked down to the nursery (over the protestations of the duty nurses) to find my baby that I saw what they were doing to her. When I asked them to stop so that I could get some explainations the lady who wouldn't give me my baby was yelling at me. I had to call the head of nursing and throw a fit to get my baby back and them away. (She was fine by the way - low apgars at birth because her cord was wrapped around her neck and fine scores ten minutes later).
So we had the last one at home. He's only 13 months. Crazy. 13 years between the first two - 13 months the next time.
My midwife moved away, but the fabulous woman who was actually my first choice last time and assisted at that birth will be able to take my insurance. I am so glad. She is wonderful. And she teaches nutrition at the local midwifery school. Perfect since I am a little nervous about having enough in me to grow a baby and keep nursing ds.
I didn't do a water birth last time, it seemed like too much work after the baby, but I might go for it this this time - I have to see what kind of pools they have on sale next month.
I'm excited to see so many other hb mamas out there!

[bjunkie]

Have children spread all out, and this pg was the first oops ever :dizzy: Still in shock, but starting to accept this. I am still nursing (alot) my just turned 2 yr old daughter too.

Due 3/14? Still early..... pretty high chance of miscarriage at my age, so cautious about getting excited.

I am a SAHM now and homeschooling too.

bjunkie

[JennyClaire]

Hi all! :wave I'm Jenny (due 3/24) and I plan to have a home birth.

LuvMyLittles, I also had my 1st DD 14 years ago at age 18 at the hospital (luckily with a CNM). When then admitted me, I refused examinations, fetal monitoring, etc.... and threatened to leave if they tried to touch me. I was only there in case something went wrong --- and because Mom STRONGLY encouraged me to go :lol! The birth was all natural, but very unpleasant. My two complaints with the hospital occured AFTER the birth. (1) they wouldn't let me hold DD as I slept in the hospital bed "in case you drop her" :rolleyes --- and (2) they said she had to drink a bottle of formula before discharge because she'd lost more than 10% of her body weight, then sent me home with cans of the SH*T "just in case." Luckily, this didn't interfere with our breastfeeding relationship.

DS was born at home two years ago with a lay midwife. Unfortunetly, it's illegal in my state, so there are no certification/training requirements. Everything went fine though. Even though we'd only moved 5 days before, I felt much more comfortable than in the hospital! I was not happy with the midwife though, and hope to find another for this birth. She'd recently broken her wrist, and DROPPED DS as he came out!!!!!! We'd originally planned on DH catching the baby, but I was nuts with the pains, and told him I needed his support near my face. Now, looking back, I feel soooooooo guilty about that, because at least I know DH would have been able to catch his precious baby.

BTW, DS is fine. He had strange lumps on his head the 1st week, but is very intelligent (if also demanding).
:zzz <--------- ME

It will be nice to have a group of ladies to chat with about planning a HB during this pregnancy. I felt so alone last time!

Jenny

[Astromom]

Be, wow, I've heard those pitocin contractions are so painful! I bet you'll sail through a homebirth! :)

PinksMommy, my DH wasn't sure about it at first either but he came around after I gave him enough research. Hang in there.

Mandy, it sounds like a homebirth would be perfect for you. I'm also trying to decide between a MW and UC. Although, unlike you, I don't have being a NICU nurse going for me!

LuvMyLittles, oh that sounds like such a terrible experience with your first DD! How cool that the midwife you want is available and able to take your insurance! That's great!

Sue, welcome! I hope this pregnancy goes smoothly for you!!

Jenny, will you have trouble finding a different midwife? I don't blame you for wanting a different one!!


As for me, I'm still trying to choose what to do regarding UC. I actually am leaning toward that midwife group that we liked. But first I'd have to figure out where to get the 500$ deposit for the first appt.... sigh...

[kdf]

Astromom, I got my same MW as last time. I am so excited that I for sure get to have another homebirth.

[didkisa]

Homebirth all the way, baby! :thumb

I'm one of those kinds of people that likes to have everything planned waaaay ahead of time. I started going to a midwife center about 4 years ago for my regular GYN to "test them out". After my m/c in March (oooh, ironic there!), I realized how awful they are! (so many complaints, so little space!) Needless to say, I was sooo glad I went on another search and found another practice where everyone is so extremely kind, friendly, helpful, and available!!!

I'll be using Birthcare in Virginia. I've already been to their orientation session, and a couple of consultation visits, so I'm fairly confident in my decision. I never considered homebirth before the orientation session there, but by the end of it I was completely won over! (so was my husband, which initially surprised me!) It just makes so much sense, doesn't it?

[coffeetastesgood]

We have definitely decided on homebirth. Yay! (we were considering earlier but after meeting with a HB MW we have decided we are definitely doing it!)

[Astromom]

kdf, yay, so glad that worked out!

Colleen, how wonderful that you already have it all planned! (I know I will be so relieved when I get the details squared away.) So glad you could join us!!

coffeetastesgood, yay!! Doesn't that definitiveness feel so good?

:)
-Jenny

[JennyClaire]

First of all, ya'll can call me JennyClaire if you want to since we already have a Jenny. It might be less confusing!

Jenny, will you have trouble finding a different midwife? I don't blame you for wanting a different one!!

Yes, I will have an extremely difficult time. The midwife's apprentice has apparently become a large animal vet or something, and every other midwife I'd researched before was over 1 hr. 45 minutes away (my labors are very short, by the time I'm sure it's real labor, there's a good chance they'd miss the birth). I plan to ask the local docs (ha! ha! ha!) if any of them are open to a HB. I will see if there are any new midwives in business. And we may consider UC, especially if we move closer to town (house has been on the market for 2 1/2 months).

I'm so jealous of those of you who have an abundance of home-birth options! Lucky duckies! I forgot to mention that my mother had my little sister at home with a midwife (in MA) when I was 8. That has always made the whole process seem normal and natural for me. And made me closer to my little sister!

:hola:Colleen and coffeetastesgood! Coffee does taste wonderful, although in the last few days it's not tasting quite so good anymore! Luckily, I'd mostly switched to decaf anyway (yuck), so I'm not missing much!

JennyClaire

[coffeetastesgood]

First of all, ya'll can call me JennyClaire if you want to since we already have a Jenny. It
:hola:Colleen and coffeetastesgood! Coffee does taste wonderful, although in the last few days it's not tasting quite so good anymore! Luckily, I'd mostly switched to decaf anyway (yuck), so I'm not missing much!

JennyClaire

LOL! Doesn't it though? It was funny because when I was signing up on MDC I was enjoying a particularly yummy coffee and was like "coffee tastes sooo gooooood".... its one of my simple pleasures... so thats what I used my signin name as... after the moment passed, then I was like "hmmm. now people are going to think I am a fiend." :duh

[JennyClaire]

LOL! Doesn't it though? It was funny because when I was signing up on MDC I was enjoying a particularly yummy coffee and was like "coffee tastes sooo gooooood".... its one of my simple pleasures... so thats what I used my signin name as... after the moment passed, then I was like "hmmm. now people are going to think I am a fiend." :duh

:lol

Not at all! Of all the MDC user-names I've seen, yours is one I can definately relate to! My father started spooning his coffee into my milk when I was a little child, and it's been a (mostly) blessed relationship ever since (barring the times at age 16-17 when I though I was having heart attacks from drinking 10+ cups/day)! :dizzy:

:coffee I love my coffee, and don't feel quite myself without craving it as I usually do!

[Lisie]

This will be my second birth, first homebirth! and I gotta say, I think most people I tell think I'm kidding. I don't know ANYONE, except you guys! who has had a homebirth. I'm afraid to tell the inlaws because I know they will object. Everyone is so medically minded. But I am very excited about this. I also live in a boarding school, which means in a house attached to a dorm, so hopefully this baby comes while the students are on March break! Actually, I think it would be good for them....I know the "school" will also think I'm crazy. I just hope no one tries to tell me I'm "not allowed", since we don't actually own the house...anyway, great to meet all of you!

[didkisa]

We're not telling anyone we're having a homebirth until after the fact. Don't have much support in general IRL with our beliefs and lifestyle. Certainly don't want to open any Pandora's boxes. We tend to keep to ourselves unless someone shows positive interest. We're more than happy to discuss our life choices with someone with an open mind who's truly interested.

[Arwyn]

As an aspiring midwife, I'm used to telling people all about homebirth and its advantages (cool story - I was at my parents' church this weekend, and one guy, probably 70yo, whose name I recognize but I don't really know comes up and starts talking to me, telling me how much he loves my parents, talking about the new baby - my niece, who was there that day - asking about what I'm doing. I tell him I'm planning on attending midwifery school next year, and he just lights up and starts enthusing about how wonderful midwives are, and how some doctors don't get it, but they're just great, etc etc. That was so cool! I find support from the oddest places sometimes! :love), so I'm also very open about planning a homebirth, if it comes up in conversation.

I've been working on my mom (she's a family doc MD) for a few years now - she's WAY pro-natural birth, had me in an old ABC in the hospital, regularly told me all about my way cool mostly hands-off birth, etc, but she also did a residency rotation in a hospital OB ward, and learned a lot of fear and "what-ifs" from that. I don't know whether she's come to embrace homebirth, think it's a kind of acceptable choice for kooks like me, or has just learned to shut up about it 'cause she knows me, but it doesn't cause issues with my family. Even my "homebirth-isn't-safe, plan-my-epidural-before-conception" SIL knows better than to say anything, and is at least outwardly supportive of my planned career.

On the other hand, I know I'm very, very lucky to live in an area where homebirth is more common, midwifery is accepted and legally protected, and breastfeeding is the norm, so that makes it much easier to be open about my birth plans. I don't generally evangelize, though - if someone asks about my doctor, I correct them with midwife, or about which hospital I'm using, I tell them I'm planning a homebirth, and so on. I'm just so positive, confident, and enthusiastic about it that the worst I've ever gotten has been confusion or bewilderment, never any negative comments.

I haven't started showing and getting questions from random strangers, yet, so we'll see how long that lasts. :lol

[mamafish9]

Well how cool! I am on an expecting in March board on another site, and I'm the only one even considering homebirth.... shoulda known to check here sooner!!

I'm 8 wks pg with #2 - DD was an absolutely amazing birthcenter waterbirth experience. However, the 1.5 hours in the car to get there was easily the worst part of my labor. Here my only birthcenter option is across the 520 bridge, and at some times of the day, an act of God couldn't get you across, so home sounds pretty good (hopefully the 20-something singles in the basement won't mind, LOL...)

DD was born in Tennessee, now we are in Seattle, and I am totally overwhelmed by how mainstream midwifery and homebirth are. My insurance will pay for a homebirth???? Crazy!! There is also a service here, on call 24/7 that delivers a really nice, big, high water tub, and takes it all away after the birth.

I think I have found my midwife (two more interviews to do, but I really liked her) - she is an ND and LM - half her practice is midwifery, the other half is pediatric and women primary care, so we will be able to stay connected with her for years. Oh, and she won't make me take the glucose test, yay... (easily the sickest day of my first pg...)

[Sunshinesmiles22]

We've been really lucky to have a midwife all ready for us. She delivered me years ago, which makes for some nice chatting. I grew up around natural childbirth being the norm, so I guess I always knew I'd do the same. Wasn't sure about my husband, but he's been extremely supportive. We had our first appt. yesterday, and he's singing her praises to the in-laws and his siblings. I thought it would be my job to defend our choice, but he's doing it on his own: unprompted. :lol

I'm feeling very comfortable with our mw, and highly suggest everyone trying to spend some time just talking with yours. (if you don't) Feeling at ease with someone like that is VITAL for me to be able to relax. What's your experience been with your mw??

[FLMama092485]

I am so scared and yet so excited. I am trying to find a midwive that will do a VBAC home birth. I am so hoping I can make this happen. The c-section with my daughter was very uncalled for. My doctor was an idiot and didn't want to let nature take it's course. But I am open to any advice from anyone. I have no idea what I am doing. :dizzy:

[cinnamonamon]

FLMama - hbacs are legal in Florida, but the midwife has to have a doctor see you once & sign off to say it's okay. In the Sarasota, FL area there are a couple, but I don't know about your area... If you can't find any resources on searching for them, you might want to try contacting the midwife I attempted my hbac with: sarasotamidwife.com She may know how to find midwives in your area. Good luck!

[lotusdebi]

:bump:

[JennyClaire]

Thanks for bumping lotusdebi. I hope you all are doing well!

This reminds me that I need to get my butt in gear and start looking for a midwife. Since I feel queasy and exhausted most of the time, this is hard to contemplate. Wish I'd done my homework in advance like Colleen.....

Please send some energy vibes my way...

[Arwyn]

Energy dust! :dust

I've put off calling midwives until just over a week from now, after I'm done with the babywearing conference, so you're not alone in being "behind".

I have been doing a BIT better in the energy and nausea department the last few days, and I'm only nearly 9w. Here's hoping it lasts - hope you get a bit of a reprieve soon too. :hug

[lotusdebi]

I'll be 9 weeks tomorrow. I made interview appts. for Wednesday with both of my midwife options. I'm a bit nervous about having the appts. so close together, but I think it'll be easier for me to compare them that way.
I'll try to send energy vibes your way, Jenny, but I don't have much energy myself, so I'm not sure I can get the energy up to send you energy vibes... :dizzy:

[honestmomma]

We're planning an HBAC. I interviewed DEMs over 18 months ago... There was no way I was going to be unprepared for this in any way shape or form.

Our first official meeting with the MWs is next weekend (yay!). I'm going to have an OB backup (who knows about my HBAC plans) which is to make my husband more comfortable (he wants to know that if we have to transfer we won't end up with someone stupid.)

[Arwyn]

Hey, that's a good reason to have a backup lined up... Although you do have to make sure that THAT person's backups are also cool, unless s/he's the super-rare OB who actually works on call.

:w by the way!

[honestmomma]

He actually works when he's on-call. But his partner is acceptable, too.

Thanks for the welcome!:)

[hairylegs]

This will be homebirth #2 for us! We're so excited! We have the most awesome midwife-I met with her a few days after I found out I was pregnant, and will meet with her to begin official prenatal care on Thursday-I'll be 7 weeks. Although this was an unexpected pregnancy, I am so thrilled for the chance to birth at home again! Yipee!

[coopnwhitsmommy]

Hi I'm planning a HBA2C (that's homebirth after 2 c-sections)

My first two "births" Well they sucked raisins through the eye of a needle.
both sections were ultimatly unnecessary, the first was a failed induction for absolutly no good reason "suspected PIH" The second/last was a coerced section for "big Baby" What can I say I grow em Large :lol

[jmhammond]

Officially, we are planning to birth in the birthing center BUT I REALLY want a home birth. REALLY REALLY REALLY. I even know a great MW who is delivering a friend in a few months, who shares our religious beliefs, and is just pretty amazing.

I'm working on DH, but wanted to post here to keep up with you guys and hopefully glean any advice. I think the hardest sells for DH are that we live in a VERY small apartment, and I had some MINOR complications with my placenta last time...

DH has agreed to have a meeting with the midwife, so hopefully she'll win him over! :thumb

[earthkid]

This will be our 2nd homebirth, and I couldn't be more excited. I was very pleased with our first birth...and we had a wonderful midwife. I am also a very tall mama (5'9) and used the aquadoula, and had no trouble whatsoever. It's wonderful to see so many mamas embracing their birth!

[fljen]

Wow, there're a lot of hbacs due in march, Awesome! We're another hbac in florida, seems to be a glut of them this month ;) My ds was a c/s from birthing center transfer. I made sure to have a midwife lined up beforehand for this one and she's awesome, brings her own tub and everything. Should be an interesting ride :)

[coffeetastesgood]

Jodi,
Would it help if you told DH that a birth in a birthing center is basically just a homebirth in someone else's house? Ultimately if you are comfortable enough to go for a birth in a birthing center, then you might as well stay at home in your own environment where you will be more comfortable...

[JennyClaire]

:dropjaw

Carrie, I've never heard anyone say that before, but it makes so much sense it's scary!
:thumb

Welcome Jodi and EarthKid!~

[Arwyn]

And because it's in someone else's house, there are more bugs that you don't have resistances to (well, higher risk of encountering the same). It's a perfectly good option for people not comfortable laboring in their own home, because of lack of space, negative associations, roommates, etc, but if your place is adequate and you feel comfortable there, it does seem a little silly to drive to a birth center.

[bemommy]

your place is adequate and you feel comfortable there, it does seem a little silly to drive to a birth center.

With one exception (this is what I'm running into with talking and thinking about our birth with DH) A homebirth is going to cost us AT LEAST $3,000 all out of pocket. My insurance will not cover a homebirth. I can go to a Birth Center and have it totally covered. I'd love a homebirth but at this point I'm thinking that I feel more comfortable not dipping into our savings.

[MotheringHeart]

Hey ladies! I'd like to join ya'll. I just found out that I'm excpecting #4 in late March! Yippee. We are planning on a homebirth and it will be our third homebirth, second with this group of midwives. I'm totally psyched already and I've got nine more months to wait!!!!

[jmhammond]

Yeah, thanks for the angle with DH, he's out of town for the week, but we're going to discuss options when he gets back. I told him to think and pray about doing a HB while he's gone.

I still have SO much research to do also, I haven't even started thinking about what my insurance will or won't cover. I know in some states insurances cover midwives and HB, but not everywhere. I gues the MW will know when we talk to her what the costs will be. thank you ladies for giving me so many things to think about and consider... :)

[tika]

Yay for all of the Florida HBAC's! Too bad we all have to be in that "AC" club to begin with.

[quiddit]

I'm 27. My youngest is 1 (14 months to be exact). All were homebirthed (including the breech one), but the first three were with a mw and the last two were UCs (one planned and one unplanned). We're moving from NC to Hawai'i in Jan/Feb, so lots of work ahead of me!

(I have been stalked online so I can't use my name.)

--Quiddit

[Arwyn]

Good point, Be - a difference of three grand is hardly silly!

:w Quiddit! :hug about the stalking - it's ok about your name. That's a crazy time to be moving! You'll be 7/8 months by then! I don't envy you. Will you be doing another UC with this one, or looking for a midwife in Hawai'i?

[JennyClaire]

:wMotheringHeart and quiddit!

That's good point about the money. If our house sells (and 3 people have come to look in the last 4 days) and we move closer to town and the hospital, I will seriously consider UC because my insurance won't pay for a HB either. However, it's cheaper than $3,000 around here. Tough decision.

Have you all see the new smile?
:uc

[quiddit]

We are planning another UC wherever we are :thumb However Hawai'i is awesome for homebirthers. My best friend's mom is a midwife, so I may use her. Midwifery isn't regulated by the state at all! Cool huh?

Q

[warrior mama]

I'm hoping/praying for a HBAC. I truely wish to avoid a RCS and I feel like this is the way to do it! Keep away from the hospital unless absolutely necessary.

[risen_joy]

Hi all!

We are hoping for a home/water birth - but someone told me it's illegal in GA! I've got the name/number of a few midwifes that said they've done them anyways - so we'll see. I doubt insurance will cover it though so I really hope it is affordable for us right now! I'm just so excited to even be pregnant!!

Elizabeth

[lotusdebi]

I interviewed the homebirth midwives in my area today. I absolutely fell in love with the CPM! She and I have very similar (possibly identical) views of birth. She's very hands-off and believes that birth is a normal, natural process that a woman's body is capable of handling with little to no intervention in the majority of cases. She doesn't do a lot of the testing, unless it's requested. She doesn't weigh people at all. She's perfect for me! I love that she has her appointments in her home! And that she has no problem with my animals or my son being present at the birth. She very much has an attitude of being there as an assistant to the birthing woman if she's needed, rather than being at all in-charge of the experience. I'm absolutely thrilled with her! I felt that we had a great rapport and good communication. We're on the same page. We have the same thoughts about birth and interventions. And her presence is so calm and quiet that she wouldn't bother me at all, even if she was in the same room as I was. She has good energy.
My insurance may not cover her, but we're going to find a way to pay for her in any case. And she has her own Aqua Doulas which she rents for an affordable price!

The other midwives were a team. They attend births together. They were more like the birth center midwives I used for my son's birth. They follow ACOG guidelines for some things, they prefer to do testing and such, they check weights and do nutritional counseling, I'd have to do a 3 day food diary there, and they just seem much more hands-on. I didn't feel a good relationship buidling with either of them. It was much more business-like and less homey than the other midwife. Less comfortable for me. And I felt that they take a position more of being in-charge of the birthing experience. While I think they'd be a good fit for a lot of women, I don't feel that they're right for me. I want to do this myself, not with people in my space and in my business all the time.

So, now I have to find out if my insurance will cover the midwife I want, and how to handle paying if they won't. I'll probably call by next week to set up my first appointment.
I'm just so excited! :D

[Astromom]

That's great lotusdebi!!!!! She sounds PERFECT!!

risen_joy, I hope you are able to get the birth you want. I've never understood how midwives can be illegal anyway. :irked:

[risen_joy]

risen_joy, I hope you are able to get the birth you want. I've never understood how midwives can be illegal anyway.

Thanks! And I know!! Hello - how did the whole world come into existence before hospitals came along?? I mean SERIOUSLY!! :hopmad

[Arwyn]

Hey all! I have my an interview with who is probably my first pick midwife and her apprentice next week! :love She's an hour away, and so offered to come here in the evening, so I invited her over for dinner. So DP and I get to sit down, eat, and chat with two really cool women next Thurs! :D How cool is that?

I still want to call and set up interviews with another couple midwives, just to get a feel for who's available in the area and what our options are. Haven't called any yet, have to go find the paper with the list on it.

How's everyone else doing?

[tika]

doing good here, had my mw consult last week. It went great, there are a few things that I didn't like but I am pretty picky and just hoping that they won't affect me. She is truly my only option for HBAC in the area, other than UC, and I really do like her a lot.

My mw is also an hour away, I have to go to her for most appointments except for the ones that traditionally take place in the home (36-ish week, birth, 24hr post partum).

I have my first real appointment on the 25th, two weeks from today.

It's still surreal that I am actually planning my HBAC!!

[lotusdebi]

My midwife and I are playing phone tag, trying to set up an appt. She doesn't need to see me for two weeks (when I'm 12 weeks pregnant), so I'm not stressed about it or anything.
I can't figure out where I'm going to put the Aqua Doula. I think my bedroom would be the perfect spot - close to the bed and to the bedroom bathroom, plenty of privacy (I'll have a family member or two at the house to take care of DS and the dogs while I'm in labor), and just perfect overall. Except that I think we'll have to move the dressers out of the room to make space for the birth pool!
I know I have plenty of time to figure this out, but its on my mind now...

[tika]

...I can't figure out where I'm going to put the Aqua Doula...

...I know I have plenty of time to figure this out, but its on my mind now...

LOL Me too!!!

I know I want it somewhere in my bedroom...

Hoping I'll get dibs on the one my mw has so that I don't have to rent one.

[DayDreamer]

Hi all. Just found out we are expecting #3, and planning our second homebirth. Leaning towards a UC this time. Looking forward to chatting with you all over the coming months!

We're in the EXACT situation as you, baby #3 and planning second homebirth, first UC.

[Arwyn]

See, I'm thinking the birth pool belongs in the living room. :p Also not sure which kind to get - I'm kind of leaning toward buying an inflatable (maybe La Bassine?).

I still haven't set up any more interviews yet. I know the one I'm seeing Thursday is ALMOST DEFINITELY who I want, but I'm a huge believer in Murphy's Law, and jinxing, and so I feel like if I don't set up other interviews, we totally won't get along in person. Am I crazy? :o :lol

[DayDreamer]

I used this http://www.qualityinflatables.com/56493.html inflatable pool for the homebirth of my son. It was nice b/c it was easy to set up (we used our vaccum to inflate it) and it was comfy having the inflated bottom. Also the sides were sturdy enough for me to sit or hang on.

Here are some pics if you'd like to see it in use. They aren't the greatest pics, but you will get the idea.

Me hanging over the edge holding my midwife:
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v11/Univfire/IM001827.jpg

Me laboring in the pool:
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v11/Univfire/IM001830.jpg

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v11/Univfire/IM001831.jpg



FWIW, I only labored in the pool, I didn't birth there. When it came time to give birth I wanted OUT of the water, lol.

[cinnamonamon]

i used a pool like that. it was way comfy -- i'm going to buy another one in the stores before the season is over. keeping it warm was easy -- my midwife & dh would scoop a few buckets out & put more hot in.

[chemE_momE]

I am also very much a believer in Murphy's Law and don't want to jinx myself. Case in point: I thought I had done my research early on and been super organized. I started researching homebirths in January, and interviewed two midwifery groups in March. The one I decided on was closer geographically, though I had only met one of the two midwives (who I had strange vibes about). But the other midwife was the one who came highly recommended, and I figured since they both attend births, I would be fine. Not so (of course). I met the other one last week, and it was the appointment from hell (she is very hands-on and was downright rude when I told her I wanted to decline testing). So, now I have to find someone new. :gloomy: Not exactly something I feel like doing during my first trimester when I am feeling crappy and tired and unmotivated. :irked:

Anyway, I'm glad I'm not the only one still searching for a HB mw. There are only three who do HB's in my area (that I know of). I guess I should just be thankful that I have other options and that I found out early enough to find someone new!

[chemE_momE]

I still haven't set up any more interviews yet. I know the one I'm seeing Thursday is ALMOST DEFINITELY who I want, but I'm a huge believer in Murphy's Law, and jinxing, and so I feel like if I don't set up other interviews, we totally won't get along in person. Am I crazy? :o :lol

If you're crazy, then so am I! :lol

[lotusdebi]

See, I'm thinking the birth pool belongs in the living room.

See, my living room is also the playroom. If I knew I could count on a super fast labor, I'd go for it. It's definitely the most comfortable, open space. But, since I don't know how long it'll take, I want to keep the playing and eating areas free for my son and whichever family member is watching him. None of us really wants his Uncle Mike to see me naked. And I don't really want to be distracted by whatever cartoon DS is watching, or have to worry about the midwife tripping over an intricate railroad set up. So, the bedroom is all that's left. If we can make room. I think we'll be moving a lot of furniture around...

ETA: I have my first prenatal appt. in 3 weeks! I'll be 14 weeks along then!

[coffeetastesgood]

I'm planning on the fishy pool for the cheapness factor and plan on setting it in our bedroom... its our sanctuary and I also get a sense of calm and peace when I am in there.

[Arwyn]

The VACUUM! We can blow it up with the VACUUM! How genius is that??? I had been thinking we needed to buy a special inflator thingie, but we have a really great vacuum (Kirby), and can just use that! Why didn't I think of that?? Thank you! :kiss:

I like our bedroom too, but our living room is nice and calm (and much closer to the water heater), and, well, not filled with toys. Yet. :D We arranged (or rather, are in the process of arranging) the living room so there's a big empty space in the middle for the dogs to play, to stretch out and do yoga, etc, which is why I think living room. And there's a lovely fireplace. Who knows, though? I may decide I want way more privacy in labor, and set it up in the bedroom. That way, the midwives can be out in the comfy living room knitting and chilling, and in the kitchen making me tasty food, while DP and I get on with the intimate business of having a baby in the sanctuary of our bedroom. :love

[DayDreamer]

The VACUUM! We can blow it up with the VACUUM! How genius is that??? I had been thinking we needed to buy a special inflator thingie, but we have a really great vacuum (Kirby), and can just use that! Why didn't I think of that?? Thank you! :

Yep, a Kirby is what we have also. Has that nifty little attachment that works perfectly!

[Lisie]

What does UC stand for? I assume it is unassisted, but what is the C?? just curious.

We have interviewed 2 midwives, and have one more to interview. I am leaning towards one so far, but trying to remain neutral until we meet the third. Hard to do!

I am also thinking about putting the pool in the living room. The only thing is it is definitely in the center of the house, so not much privacy, but then I was walking around naked in the hospital for my first birth. The other thing is that I was definitely dripping blood at one point during my first labor, and our living room is carpeted---is this an issue for anyone?? I do want to be able to move freely, at least I think I do.

I'm just wondering who will be my son's designated person. I know we have time to figure that out, but it seems unclear to me who it should be right now! Also because I want him to be there for the actual birth if he wants to, so it would need to be someone who we are comfortable with being there as well....any ideas? So far I'm thinking my close friend, but she also has a child, so her husband would need to be available for him...

[DayDreamer]

UC stands for Unassisted Childbirth.

My daughter was 2 at the time of my son's birth. I went into labor and she actually slept through it right next to me. We woke her 15 mins before my son was born and my MIL took her to the livingroom to "wake up" and adjust to what was going on, and she came in the bedroom just in time for the birth.

My birth pool was set up in a spare room we had at the time. It was a small room, but big enough. I had it in that room so the rest of my house "stayed in place" and it was private and intimate. However I did not stay in the tub the entire time and I walked around my house naked during labor. I'm just that type though. (And there were no men other than my DH there, so it made me more comfortable).

HTH

[lotusdebi]

My whole house is carpeted, except for the kitchen and bathrooms (none of which have room for a birthing pool). I'd be more concerned about the carpet if we didn't have multiple animals and a kid always making messes on it already! I figure that the steam cleaner will pick up whatever mess we make. Eventually.

We've asked my foster mom and foster brother to be our son's designated people. My foster bro ("Uncle Mike") doesn't work, so he'll be available just about any time, unless he's drunk. My foster mom is a better choice for being around me when I'm naked, but she's not as readily available. We also have my foster sister as back-up. She lives farther away, but works nearby, so that would mostly depend on timing.
What we had to look at when picking people to be with our son was: Who is he closest to? Who do we trust the most? Who are the dogs comfortable with? And who's going to freak out the least about me giving birth at home? My foster mom strikes out on the last one, but is otherwise a great choice. :wink We have friends who are closer, but they're not comfortable with the dogs, nor as comfortable in our house, and they already have kids to worry about. If labor goes too quickly, then my son will be fine without someone there to help him. He wants to participate in the birth, but he also knows how to keep himself entertained (and even fed) if he gets bored or uncomfortable with what we're doing.

[Mavournin]

I was going to put the birthtub in the living room with my last birth, but the midwives wanted it on the same floor as the bathroom. (We only have one) So we put it up in my bedroom. It was big (AquaDoula) but it worked well. And I was glad for their suggestion because I spent the majority of my labor on the toilet.

This time I have bought a smaller inflatable birthtub. Not a fishy pool, but one made specifically for labor. I'm still thinking about renting an AquaDoula again though. It is amazing to have all that space and the option of Dh and/or the kids joining me in it.

[JennyClaire]

Not exactly something I feel like doing during my first trimester when I am feeling crappy and tired and unmotivated. :irked:

Right there with you. Ugh! I've NEVER felt so miserable in the first trimester. Either it's the strain of my energetic nursing toddler, a molar pregnancy, or twins. Blah!

Anyway, I'm glad I'm not the only one still searching for a HB mw. There are only three who do HB's in my area (that I know of). I guess I should just be thankful that I have other options and that I found out early enough to find someone new!

Yes, you're lucky. I hope one of the other ones work out! I am having no luck --- still waiting to hear back from several online places I've left my name, but (so far) no one's gotten back to me. Not sure what the next step is if they don't...

[Astromom]

Arwyn, hope the interview w/ the midwife went great today!

tika, glad you found someone you're mostly happy with!

chemE_momE, how disappointing that you have to start over again finding a new midwife! Have you had any luck interviewing the others?

I also am having truble figuring out who, if anyone, should be here to watch dd. Our family nearby is not supportive of homebirth, and all our friends have kids of their own. She'll be 4 1/2... so I'm leaning toward no one for her right now (dh will have to split his time supporting both of us.) Considering how quick labor went with her (less than an hour), I'm hoping it won't really be an issue.

With her birth, we had the AquaDoula in the (carpeted) living room and it was fine, but we didn't have anyone else there to worry about. This time, I'm actually wondering if I even want to mess with the pool. I loved laboring in the water (for the whole 10 minutes I was in there :rolleyes) but looking back I do not think I liked birthing in it. I think I would prefer to get out to birth this time. So I'm actually thinking I'll just labor in the oval garden tub in the master bathroom. It's not a huge thing, but it's bigger than a standard bathtub. What do you all think?

And I finally decided to go with a midwife and not do UC. I just wasn't sure if they would make it in time, but even if they don't they'll get here eventually and can help clean up, help with the placenta if needed (it took 2 hours to come out before), make sure all is well, do laundry, all that stuff. So add that to the prenatal care and it's worth the $$. I read a lot in the UC board, looked through some other UC resources -- and it seems like if you have ANY fears at all, it's just not a good idea. And I do have some fears that I'm not sure I could work out before the birth.

So my first appointment is next week and I'm pretty excited!

[mamafish9]

What we have decided to do for our DD (she's 2.5 now) is to hire a doula just for her. We don't have a good family/friend choice, and I didn't want DH trying to deal with both of us :p . We found a wonderful woman who has two young daughters of her own, and she will spend some time with us prenatally so that DD is comfortable with her. I figure she will be able to react to DD's needs, but also to see where I'm at and be able to "encourage" DD out of the room if I need it, or whatever. Also, if DD needs DH (to put her to bed or something like that), then the doula could be with me. It's not the cheapest solution, but it has brought me a lot of peace, meeting DD's needs gracefully was one of my biggest concerns about this birth.

I'm torn on what to do about a tub, however. I had a waterbirth with DD at a birthing center - huge deep tub, and I loved it. I got in at 5cm dilated and was only in for 2.5 hours - fast first labor. I have the option of renting an Acquadoula-like tub here, or buying an inflatable tub. I like the rental tub being deeper (I did a lot of my labor in a squat), but if I have a fast labor, it might not get filled up in time. I don't want to mess with having to keep water warm if this babe has a bigger head than DD did, however. Thoughts?

[Arwyn]

Oooo, I love doulas for siblings. :thumb

People who have done long waterbirths with an inflatable say they do bucket scoops and refills (or rather, their partners and midwives do!). I've even talked to one midwife who doesn't like the rentables because they're so much more expensive and she doesn't find the heater adequate. :shrug

Jenny - just like with hospital v. fsbc v. homebirth, I don't think UC is about having NO fears or worries, just finding the option with which you have FEWEST. Glad you're feeling comfy with your decision! :love

My interview is tonight - we're serving them dinner, and had all these great plans about doing bbq kebobs, etc, and, um, haven't done a darn thing. :o So who knows. And I don't have any other interviews set up, although I've contacted another couple midwives (sent emails, haven't heard back), so I'm feeling a little like I've jinxed the whole thing! Eeep!

[lunadoula]

Hey everyone, I haven't posted for on this thread in awhile b/c nothing much on the homebirth front. But I have to say I am really, REALLY excited about the postpartum care! I have been a doula for 4 years but only attended one homebirth (the rest were hospitals) and honestly I had no idea that homebirth midwives (at least mine, anyways) have such great postpartum visit schedules - coming to my house so frequently and so many times! Kind of a "duh!" but I just had never thought about it. It makes me feel *so* much better just knowing this now - I feel comfortable with the idea of giving birth (yes I'm sure I'll freak out eventually but I know at least from seeing so many births that I know I can do it) but I was really concerned about postpartum - I really don't know a whole lot about breastfeeding beyond basic knowledge. I feel a lot better knowing my midwife and/or the apprentice will be there so often. I see so many families as a doula who go home and have problems or no support (besides me, and I only do 2 pp visits) and that was freaking me out.

[Astromom]

Exactly! I had totally forgotten that part of midwifery care for some reason. :duh When I pulled out my old records and realized that our dd's midwife spent 6 hours with us after the birth -- I was surprised. I had forgotten how long she was there helping, and I don't know what I would have done without her constant care. It was definitely a big part of my decision to go ahead with midwifery care this time.

So now I'm thinking the perfect birth would be something very like dd's -- a short easy labor, dh brings me water and looks after dd, the midwives walk in as I'm pushing, and then they stay and pamper us for half the day! We'll see if I can orchestrate that. :lol

Arwyn, did the dinner work out??

[Arwyn]

It went great, except I was totally out of it. I had spent too much time on the computer earlier in the day, had a monitor migraine, and was just soooooooooo "Ummmm.... soooooo.... yeaaaaaaaaaa...." DP picked up the slack though and asked a bunch of questions. It was weird, though, because we already knew their basic philosophy 'cause I've talked to the main midwife here on MDC, and her apprentice helps run the correspondence course I'm taking! So really, it was more about seeing how well we got along in person, which went pretty well. They went gaga over our dogs. :love We basically spent two hours eating pizza and bitc- er, talking about standard birth care, and I was thinking, yea, this is probably going to be good. Then as they were leaving I got a hug, and it just CLICKED. It was like YES! This is the energy I want at my birth! Is that weird?

Anyway, then I wake up this morning and got an email from another midwifery practice I had contacted a couple days ago, so we're probably going to interview them, too, just to get a comparison.

The prenatal and postpartum care is definitely one of my main draws to midwifery care, because otherwise we want a REALLY hands-off birth. But the one we're considering lends a fetoscope out at 30 weeks, teaches the partners palpitation and auscultation, then comes to the house something like four times over the next two weeks. And that's just rad.

[Astromom]

Yay Arwyn, that's great! They sound perfect! :bgbounce

[JennyClaire]

:bump:

Okay, here's my update. Found a midwife, and finally got psyched up to call so I could go on vacation without that hanging over my head. DH and I (with DS in tow, I suppose) have an appointment 9/19. She has more experience than I'd thought, and I have a feeling that this will work out for us, if we can afford it! I have learned to wait and ask most of my questions during the 1st visit instead of over the phone...

Hoping the birth will coincide with DD's spring break so that she'll be able to watch DS during the birth. Unless I'm very late, this should work out... I know lots of women like having their kiddos in the room, but I turn into a terrible grouch and like to labor (mostly) alone.

[Scattershoot]

Hi there- wow, i have some catching up to do with this board! i have an edd of 3-23, we had ds in a birthing center and plan on hb with this one. I'd love to do a uc but we've already had 3 mc, and have spent hundreds on accupuncture to get this one to sick :wink the "what if" factor is weighing too heavy and am going with a HB midwife for insurance.

I did get to the thread on how to pick a mw. in my area Austin TX there are tons of mw! Lots to choose from! When I got prego the i sent out an email interview with important questions (to me) including their philosophy of birth, what tests they require, what their procedures are when you are "past due", what the charges are, where prenatal appts would be, etc... to get a feel for the best fit for us. We wanted someone who was going to have minimal interventions and not freak out when we decline all the tests that we don't feel are neccessary for us.

After limiting it down to a couple, we set up face to face interviews... I am really happy with our choice. She's got a very sweet spirit and is willing to work with me despite my unconventionalites....

see ya'll 'round!
Katie

PS I have to add that dh posts around here and we are sharing the screen name ( he's usually hanging out on the vac board....)

[DayDreamer]

Well, I found out today that my first choice midwife is not comfortable being my midwife because of my financial situation (although on her website it says she has a "sliding scale" and will take partial barter). I was disappointed, but figured this was meant to be and called my second choice.

I click so much better with my second choice, she was only my second choice because she is double the distance from me. However every time we talk (and we've talked in the past b/c of my desire to go into midwifery) we talk for hours and the conversation flows so easily. My first choice midwife has only had contact with me via email and never once gave me her phone number and has declined my request for her to call me. So really, I'm sorta relieved that I'm going with my second choice, if that makes sense.

[Arwyn]

Pregagain - definitely sounds like the "second" midwife is the one for you! The midwife we went with lives in Salem, which is an hour away, even though there are like twenty gazillion midwives here in Portland. It's all about who you feel comfortable with.

Speaking of which, we had our first prenatal appt last night!!! :love It went really well, although I totally lost all my street cred and opted to use the dopplar. :bag: And we heard...

The placenta! That's right, all that angst over ultrasonic radiation, dopplar having way more radiation than visual ultrasound, and I have an anterior placenta and we couldn't pick up the heartbeat anyway. :eyesroll Ah well. Serves me right. :lol

On the other hand... we heard the placenta! How cool is that?! There's a PLACENTA in there!!! :D And DP got to feel my uterus! WOOHOO!!! :bouncy



OK, coming down off my high now. Honest... ;)

[cinnamonamon]

Speaking of which, we had our first prenatal appt last night!!! :love It went really well, although I totally lost all my street cred and opted to use the dopplar. :bag: And we heard...

The placenta!

:lol That's awesome! I caved as well. We heard baby's heartbeat -- she was waaaayy down low -- the midwife had to move down to my pubic bone & work her way up. We won't use it again until labor, though. ;)

Pregagain -- I'm glad everything worked out for you! :D

[chemE_momE]

I interviewed my second choice for midwife (second choice b/c she is farther away than my first choice) last week and she was awesome. She was *totally* fine with me declining all blood tests. I feel so relieved that things are falling into place now and I can start to enjoy my pregnancy. :)

[coffeetastesgood]

I too had my first hb prenatal...and wow! What a difference! (other 2 kiddos were hospital births)
I had such a quality appointment. My HB MW already knows me better than my old practice. Our appointment lasted almost 3 hours and included lunch :)

[Nicole77]

I'm in! This will be our second homebirth. The first was a truly amazing experience and a really easy birth. Fingers crossed for the same thing this time!

[Turkish Kate]

Well, I can now stand up and clap and raise my hand and say, "Me too!" We met with the only English-speaking midwife around here (and her partner, a massage therapist/doula) and are thrilled that we now have a birth team put together. It turns out that one of the reasons she didn't get back to me quicker is that she was considering leaving the country since she couldn't really find people who were wanting natural births, either home or hospital. Then along comes me--and she's decided to stay! Since then, she's apparently been contacted by two more couples, so she feels like she's made the right decision.

I feel like a huge load has been taken off my shoulders. If it wasn't for her, hubby and I would be doing it at home unassisted, which is not really ideal for us right now.

Whew!

Kate

[Astromom]

Kate, what a relief! I'm really glad that the mw will be available for you!!

Welcome Nicole! :wave

coffeetastesgood, yep aren't mw appts the best? So personable and fun!

I cannot wait until my appt next Tuesday!!! Only 6 days and we FINALLY will get to hear the hb!! (At least I hope so!!! We heard it at 16 wks with dd on the fetoscope so I'm hoping!!) :fingersx:

[lotusdebi]

I had my first prenatal appt. today!
My son was a handful, but the midwife's apprentice helped by talking with him while I talked with the midwife. We decided against bloodwork. I checked my urine. The midwife checked my fundal measurements (14 cm - perfect since I'm 14 weeks pregnant), found the heartbeat with the Doppler (DS was impressed!), and checked my blood pressure. I filled out a bit of paperwork, and we talked. That was it! Very low-intervention - just the way I like it! And all done in the midwife's home! :D I wish I didn't have to pay $4 in tolls to get there and back, but it's worth it. She's awesome! I have another appt. to see her in a month. :)

[Arwyn]

Yay Kate!

debi - sounds great! :) I'm really looking forward to our next one. A month seems so long to wait! :lol

Not that there's anything to do... we'll probably talk diet a little, maybe movement or birth plans, palpate the fundus... But I don't want to do dopplar again, it's too early for fetoscope (my midwife has partial hearing loss, can't usually pick up anything with fetoscope until 20-24 weeks), we're not doing blood work or urine dips or anything. Really more a chance to sit and chat. And I can't wait! :lol

[ChristieB]

I want to join! I'm due Mar. 7, and we're planning a home birth.

We planned one last time, too. But I ended up being induced in the hosptal at 42 1/2 wks. I was really bumbed about it for awhile, but really, as I look at it, it turned out as well as it could have. My midwife and her apprentice were there with me. The mw's back-up dr. was there and stayed about 12 hrs. after his 24 hr. shift ended so that he would be there for me. I ended up pushing about 4 1/2 hrs., and everyone assures me that no other dr. would have allowed that. They would have done a c-section. And I had a 4th degree tear, and it took him 2 1/2 hrs. to stitch me up. But he did a fabulous job. And he had no objections to me holding and nursing my ds while he stitched. A friend of mine who knows him said that he's a midwife in disguise. :lol His wife is a midwife, and they've birthed their children at home.

I've been a bit bumbed lately, because my midwife is going on sabatical starting next Jan. We were both in tears when I called her to tell her I'm pregnant. But, she has someone taking over her practice for her, and they will become partners when the sabatical is over. I met with that mw, and I really like her. I felt really comfortable with her, and since she's in the same office, I felt really comfortable there, too. She was great with ds, too. And she's fine with no u/s or doppler, no testing, etc. And she's willing to come out here (we're almost 2 hrs. from there -- there's no homebirth mw out here). And she'll have the same back-up dr., which is nice. I don't plan on needing him this time. :thumb But, knowing how real the possibility is, it's nice to know that we'd have him if needed. I'll meet with him once during the pregnancy, so that technically I'm a patient of his. That way we wouldn't have to just hope he's on duty if/when we need him. We'd be able to call him. Anyway, I really like this mw, and I'm feeling really good about things. My first prenatal is next Thurs. I look forward to talking to her more, and measuring the fundus. And, since Astromom mentioned hearing the heartbeat with a fetascope last time at 16 wks., I'll ask her to try that.

I don't think I'll go so far post dates this time. My uterus is already tightening. I don't remember much of that at all last time. And if I had BH last time, I was unaware of them. And I'm quite aware of my body. I think last time my body for some reason just wasn't ready for labor. Does that make any sense? Anyway, I feel like this time my body is kicking into gear, and that makes me very happy. Plus, now I know that acupuncture can induce labor naturally. I will definitely try that this time if I'm "late".

Well, this has become quite long, so I'll stop for now. Glad to be here!

Christie

[kerikadi]

We had our first prenatal yesterday at 12 weeks. This is our third homebirth with this midwife and we just love her sooooo much :love She really is part of our family. My older children know and love her and, of course, the girls have known her since their births.
One of the best parts of being pregnant was the fact that I will get to see her all the time again :thumb
Oh, and in the first trimester I only gained 1 pound which I am pretty proud of considering I haven't been able to work out like I usually do because of the nausea. The good news is that I am feeling better and plan to hit the gym tomorrow :D

Keri

[kdf]

Well I had a second prenatal appt. It was crazy. I had my 4 year old nephew, my 2 year old neice and my 15 month old ds with me. It was a short visit. But we heard the heartbeat, which is all I wanted to do. I love that noise. I am measuring a little small but my mw isn't concerned. Everything else was great.:thumb

[Astromom]

Christie, welcome! Wow, that OB sounds incredible!!! So glad you have him as a backup this time too (of course you won't need him!) It's great that you hit it off with the mw taking over your current mw's practice! Good luck hearing the hb next week! Just to warn you I think hearing the hb with the fetoscope is more like a 20wk event, maybe 18wks... so definitely don't get discouraged if they don't hear it. It certainly doesn't hurt to try though! For my mw to hear at 16 wks was probably a combination of dd being in a good position, my mw's patience, being on the skinny side, and a bit of luck! I'm hoping for the same this time around!

Keri, that's so wonderful that you have such a great relationship with your midwife!

Kristy, glad your little one's doing well!

3 days left til my 2nd appt, whoo hoo! My dh gets to go this time, I'm so excited! He just talked to baby last night for the first time through my tummy -- I think it's finally starting to become real for him. :love

[ewp11100]

Well I guess I'll chime in here:LOL We are planning a hb with this one too. My ds was a transfer and ended up comming 30-45 min after we got to the stupid hospital :dizzy: About due dates and fibbing dates. I was going to do just that, my son was 9 days late only because i was being pressure by my midwife to meet that 2 weeks after window and had her strip my membranes. He wasn't ready, imo. All my family have babies 42-43 weeks so it was a big concern for me. When I interviewed my midwife I told her that it was a family history and I didn't want any pressure and if she had a policy about it we might not work well together. Forcunately she was very understanding about the whole thing. As on your interview before you give dates as to what their policy is.

[honestmomma]

We had our second visit with the HB midwives. Inbetween the two, I had an appt with my backup ob... man. What a stark difference. My "appt" with the midwives was 90 minutes of sharing, support and laughter. My "appt" with the OB was 90 minutes of me sitting on a paper sheet (that I glued myself to with sweat! Yuck!) before a 10 minute visit where the ob told me I was perfect VBAC candidate. Well, thanks.

Why didn't I HB my first?! :)

[Astromom]

Had my second appt today -- all is well with the little one, whoo hoo!

The other day we were out at dinner with my husband's family, and his sister started talking to me about the pregnancy. Then she started to tell me a story about a friend: "I have a neighbor who had a totally normal pregnancy and she had a homebirth BUT..." and then she stopped and looked at me. She said "Hmm, do you want to hear this story?" I said "Does it have a happy ending?" She said "No." Well, good god girl, what do you think? I told her no thanks, and then I went on to tell her that homebirths are as safe or safer than hospitals. I reminded her that I would not have made it to the hospital on time with dd because labor was so fast, and I would have had her in the car. Then she said "Oh, well, you could just schedule a C-section in the hospital." WHAT????!! Did you JUST meet me? :dizzy:

Had to share with people who would understand my frustration. :)

[cinnamonamon]

I don't remember if I shared this or not, but at our appt last week we heard little bean's heartbeat. I had flip flopped on whether or not to do it, and finally decided to do it this time and then not again until she can use the fetoscope.

This is baby number 3, but it was the most amazing thing, ever! I think maybe since the first 2 were so planned & expected I sort of scratched my head & thought -- well, of course there's a heartbeat -- we wanted to get pg, we tried, we succeeded (sp??), and now he's growing -- end of story. This one it just sort of made it (more) true, iykwim. :throb


Jenny -- isn't it scary -- that's what so many have begun to believe! :bigeyes

[tika]

Jenny, isn't that attitude so sad...and terrifying? *sigh*

[Full Heart]

ChritieB - I always go to 42+ weeks and have lots of BH in each pg. I think some babies just like to cook longer. :lol they come out well done. Your back-up sounds wonderful though!

Astromom - :dizzy: A nice short labor or major surgery? Hmmm...which one?

My next appt is friday. Might have to cancel...My brothers have cp and am waiting for my kids to get them. But it might be a good things since the free wayto my house is closed that night and mw would have to take surface streets to get here. Which would be a pitb.

[kerikadi]

Full Heart - Good luck with the pox. I exposed my girls in February and they both got them :thumb :fever: I exposed the girls on the same day and one of them broke out two weeks later and the other two weeks after her :dizzy: Part of me wanted to get it done and over with but I guess it was good that they weren't both miserable at the same time.
I made my girls daily smoothies to boost their immune systems - we didn't have any high fevers, nothing over 100, no lost sleep and almost no itching:thumb

Keri

[txgal]

Hi Keri,

Just cruising around and saw you here. See you at BIRTH fair, Kathryn and Guyler are going to model in the fashion show, should be fun.

Lydia

[cinnamonamon]

I made my girls daily smoothies to boost their immune systems - we didn't have any high fevers, nothing over 100, no lost sleep and almost no itching:thumb

Keri Keri, what did you put in the smoothies? I was bummed that the neighbors got cp this fall -- dh thought ds1 & 2 were way too young to get it (intentionally, anyhow), and we were both a bit nervous about the pregnancy & cp thing... I'd love any info on immune system boosting, though...gotta start my file -- they'll get sick eventually, lol.

[kerikadi]

:wave Hi Lydia! Yes! I will FINALLY get to meet Kathryn :D

We put all kinds of good stuff in the smoothies because the girls weren't eating great, let me see if I can remember everything:

Berry flavored protein powder - PermaLean is my favorite:thumb
Banana
Strawberries
Blueberries
Flax Seed Oil
Fish Oil
Emergen'C
Powdered Greens
Echinacea

I'm thinking there is something else but can't remember it right now. My girls were 3.5 and 2. The younger one got it the worst but I think that is because she got it from her sister. They say it is better to get it 'casually' than with someone you live with.
We also gave them nightly oatmeal baths and I had an anti-itch homeopathic from Boiron but I can't remember the name right now. We didn't put anything specific on the pox because that would really draw their attention to them and make them think they were supposed to itch. We did keep them in cotton long sleeves and long pants pajamas so they also didn't see them and start itching.

Keri

[cinnamonamon]

:notes: Thanks Keri! :D

[ChristieB]

Don't have much time now, but wanted to let you know that my mw heard the baby's heartbeat with the fetascope yesterday! :banana It was faint, and just for a couple of seconds, but she heard it. Even though ds was talking the whole time. And I measured in at 15 cm, just right.

It was a great visit. 1 1/2 hrs. long. She wanted to hear all about ds's birth (which, of course, I love talking about :p ). And she said that she's been looking for a back-up mw, just in case she can't make it (like if someone else goes into labor or something), and that my former mw has offered to be a back-up for me. So sweet! And it feels really good knowing that no matter what, someone who I feel comfortable with and good about will be here for the birth.

Christie

[honestmomma]

I have an "issue" i'm hoping y'all can give me some thoughts on.

I'm a VBAC this time around, and we're planning a HB with a DEM. We live a whopping two-ish blocks from the hospital, so in the case of an emergent transport, it wouldn't take long to get there.

I have an OB (he wasn't my ob with my first birth) who's agreed to be my backup (last year at my annual). I have an appt Monday, and I need to set the details of what he's going to see me for, etc. I'm a little nervous, though, because I know he's backed up for women who've seen the CNM who does homebirths, but I don't know if he's backed up a DEM before. (The CNM can't attend me for insurance reasons)

I've chatted with my DEM, and she says to just tell him you've decided to go the home route, talk with him about what it means to him to back up, etc.

Part of me, honestly, just wants to tell him "we're doing this at home, thanks for your time" but I know my DH would feel much, much better knowing that if we transport, our OB will meet us there (and that would make me feel better, too). But I know "on-call" means you-get-who-you-get but it makes me nervous to think I might get the OB who delivered our son (You'd seriously have to sedate me if that woman is near me). I'm hoping my OB says "you call, I show up, no matter what" but I'm not holding my breath.

So, I guess what I'd like to hear are your plans. Do any of you have back ups? If you are a VBAC, what are you doing? Do you think a back-up is even needed in case of emergent transport?

Thanks!!

[lotusdebi]

I don't have a back-up, and my midwife can't come to the hospital with me in a midwife capacity (CPMs aren't "legal" in my state.) Basically, if I end up in the hospital, it will only be in the case of an absolute emergency (truly emergency c-section, or a definite need for me or the baby to be immediately seen by an MD.) I don't know of any good OBs at the hospital closest to me, nor am I going to try to find one. I don't expect to have the time or the mindset to call on such a person in the case of a true emergency, honestly. If I'm at the point that I actually need to go to the hospital, things are already out of my hands.
I don't expect an emergency situation, however, and I trust my midwife completely. If something happens during my pregnancy that indicates that I may need to deliver in a hospital rather than home, I'll worry about it at that time.

[tika]

My thinking is the basically the same as Debi's on the issue. If it's a true emergency, whatever can save me and/or my baby the fastest is the care I need. There may not be time to call my back up OB and get him to the hospital.

My midwife will give me paperwork toward the end of my pregnancy to show that I've had prenatal care.

If it makes you feel better to have a back up, then do it. If you think it would add more stress (which is very likely when you're VBAC'ing), then don't. I don't see why a VBAC mom needs a back up OB anymore than anyone else. If you decide on shadow care, you don't have to go to every visit...cancel a bunch if you want. If it becomes too stressful for you, you can always just stop going. By all means, check the situation out...if you don't like it, you don't have to stick with it.

I'm just trying to enjoy this pregnancy in peace and I don't think having shadow care would allow me to do that as much.

[Arwyn]

I'm not having a backup - my midwife (CPM, LDM - legal in this state, but obviously can't do hospital birth) knows or knows of many of the OBs, and for a non-emergency situation (which the VAST majority of transfers are, even when transfering for a necessary c-section), she calls around to the local hospitals and sees who's on call, making sure it's a doctor she can work with (or rather one who's willing to work with her, and with homebirth transfers, and be reasonably polite about it). In a real emergency situation, we go to the nearest hospital ASAP and take whoever is there. :shrug

[Scattershoot]

I am using a mw and paying oop, my insurance is very basic and doesn't cover maternity. (We only have it for emergencies like a car crash or something). Just planning that all will go well.

[kerikadi]

There is a back-up OB that works with my MW and she likes me to see him once during the pregnancy so that we can basically say he is my doctor.

Having said that the only way I would see him is if it wasn't an emergency because the hospital he is on staff at is nowhere near my home.

We know which hospital we would transport to - it is important that you know how long it will take to get there and that they have at least a stage 2 nursery because a MW brings sage one with her so if, by chance, the baby became the issue and you went straight to a stage one nursery/neonatal then it is likely you would be separated as the baby would have to go to a different hospital via ambulance or even helicopter if there was grave danger :(

So, you want to make sure that whatever hospital you plan to go to has at least a stage 2 neo :thumb
We know that if the emergency was me it doesn't really matter who my doctor is because he won't be the doctor seeing me but it is kind of nice to be able to say 'Dr. G is my OB but was too far to go'. By nice I mean easy to explain to the hospital so they don't get all freaky on you. My MW would transport with me but her role would change as soon as we crossed the threshold - she would then be my Doula/Advisor and no longer my Primary Care Giver/Midwife.

Keri

[MsElle07]

I'm not having a backup - my midwife (CPM, LDM - legal in this state, but obviously can't do hospital birth) knows or knows of many of the OBs, and for a non-emergency situation (which the VAST majority of transfers are, even when transfering for a necessary c-section), she calls around to the local hospitals and sees who's on call, making sure it's a doctor she can work with (or rather one who's willing to work with her, and with homebirth transfers, and be reasonably polite about it). In a real emergency situation, we go to the nearest hospital ASAP and take whoever is there. :shrug

Same here, except my MW is a CNM.

[JennyClaire]

I've been struggling with this same issue myself, and am not 100% sure of what I'm doing. My MW's backup would be too far for a transport. I have no idea if my small, rural hospital has a stage 2 nursery, but I rather suspect they don't. Not many options when you live in the middle of no where!

Torn because I feel that it would be the "responsible thing" to have an OB backup, but the thought of even one visit with the mainstream medical community makes my skin crawl. Definately couldn't do shadowing, but I dread the conversation where I tell the doc that I'm actually planning a HB.

BTW, FINALLY met with the MW on Tuesday. It went well, and we talked for 2 hours, but she didn't feel that there was anything for her to check at 13 weeks unless I wanted to use the doppler, which I don't.

[bred]

KERI!!!! :w So very happy to see you here! :love

Jenny - I'm really glad it looks like things are looking up for you! Let us know how your thinking about UC goes - as DP said, even with our first, we're about this close to wanting UC. :D But here in Portland we have a plethora of midwives, so we're looking for someone very hands-on in pregnancy (in terms of fetal positioning, massage, nutrition - very relationship oriented) and very hands OFF in birth - knitting in a corner exuding confidence and trust would be my ideal, while DP and I get down to business. :love But I also want someone there in case in the moment I find I need something more, in terms of in-my-face support. Does that make sense?

Arwyn, how did you get so SMART?! I mean, not as in: those who don't do it this way are dumb, but just that you really have this all figured out, and you've never even done it before!!! I'm envious, and so so happy for you.

I'm Breana, and this will be baby #3... and my second baby in the last year almost!:nut With my first, I *thought* I had it all figured out--read everything I could get my hands on, considered having a doula but had all of the women in my life in the room instead (16 people there, total--HA), and a detailed, well-researched and thought out birth plan...but chose to birth in the hospital with an OB, and ended up having a c/s for a mal-positioned baby.:(
After that I became a doula, and found ICAN, and realized what I needed to do to increase my chances for a normal, natural birth that was more like the one I wanted. So, we chose to have a homebirth with our son this last february. My l