PALS in the house!

[paisley]

Welcome to the Pregnancy After Loss Support thread. Whether you've experienced a miscarriage or late term loss prior to this pregnancy, being pregnant again is likely to bring up all sorts of feelings that the average person might not have. We are here to offer each other support, understanding and reassurance. If this sounds like a good place for you, please come on in and introduce yourself. :)

[paisley]

As for me, I am here after 10mos of TTC and m/c's in 9/05 and 4/06. Both my losses were early so they have been attributed to low progesterone. I am on supplementation this time around and both my P and hCG levels looked great at my last blood draw. I go back and forth between happy and nervous but I am trying to stay positive. I think I will feel a lot better once I get past 10 or 12 weeks (which seems so far away right now!).

[lotusdebi]

I miscarried in late Feb, a week after I found out I was pregnant. I became pregnant right after going off of the pill, and getting pregnant so fast was a surprise. I've been TTC since then, and put off testing for a week after my period was due, since I was afraid of getting my hopes up again. I was making all sorts of excuses about my symptoms, including coming down with the flu. :lol
I'm still feeling anxious. Just kinda waiting and hoping that things will go well. Every twinge makes me cringe a bit, and I keep looking for blood when I go to the bathroom. I'm trying not to think about possible names. And I'm not interviewing midwives just yet.

I haven't told my son that I'm pregnant. I think that's the hardest for me, since I'm a SAHM. DS knew about my pregnancy last time, at the same time that my husband did. But, explaining the miscarriage was really hard. And DS had a difficult time processing that. I don't want to put him through that again. Especially since his cat just died.

So, that's where I'm at. I really appreciate this thread! Thank you!

[paisley]

Hi Debi! Congrats and lots of sticky vibes to you! :dust :sticky

I am right with you on feeling anxious. I have been feeling some cramping/stretching sensations and that's definitely a bit nerve wracking. And every time I go to the bathroom I wonder if this will be the day I find blood (total toilet paper checker here too :o). Could we all just have a pregnancy remote control and fast forward to the 'safe' part please?

My son is a bit younger than yours so with the first 2 m/c's we didn't actually tell him, but I think he knew. With the first, he weaned right after I O'd and then started asking to nurse again right before I started spotting. The second time he announced that there was a baby boy in my tummy. It's so hard to untell people, especially the little ones.

I'm glad that we're here for each other. You know, not for the loss part, but for the support and understanding part. :hug

[Llyra]

I'd love to join you. I'm not PG immediately after a loss; I had DD. But three years ago I lost my son at 19 1/2 weeks, which is right on the edge of stillborn vs. miscarriage. It was a horrendous and horrible experience for me, and I was so fearful the whole time I was pregnant with DD. I have resolved to try and keep that fear under control this time, but I can't help being anxious. By 19 weeks, you start to feel safe, ya know? Today, my boobs aren't sore suddenly, and that sent me into a tailspin of worry this morning. I am also a toilet paper checker, and every little twinge or ache gets blown way out of proportion with me.

So I understand the added anxiety that comes with having been through a loss or even more than one. It's nice that we can support each other like this. So here's some happy healthy sticky baby vibes for one and all!!!!!!

[Astromom]

Paisley, yay that your numbers are so good! How long will you be doing the supplementation?

LotusDebi, I'm sorry for your loss. I know what you mean about checking for blood every time. This is such a stressful time.

Llyra, I'm so sorry for the loss of your son. It's such a horrible experience to feel safe, and then have that happen.

My biggest fear is another missed miscarriage. With our first pregnancy in 2001, we discovered at 14 weeks that the babe had died at around 10 weeks. I waited 3 more weeks to miscarry naturally, but my body refused. Looking back, I really see the evidence that things were going badly, but I was oblivious at the time. Mainly the fact that I never got very strong pregnancy symptoms, but other things should have clued me in too. It was my first, and I didn't know any better.

With DD's pregnancy after that, I was a lot more confident that things were going well because I was so very badly sick. When that let up at 13 weeks, I got paranoid and did an hCG draw which came back fine. When the midwife could hear the heartbeat at 16 1/2 weeks with the fetoscope I was so happy. And I could feel movements not long after that.

I miscarried again the beginning of March, naturally this time. It was an early loss, and I attribute it to being low weight and I was still nursing a little bit too... I think my body refused to put up with all that. I didn't have any early pregnancy signs with that one either.

I've gained enough weight to make me comfortable since then, and my daughter weaned herself. I'm feeling good strong symptoms and I will continue to assume that this pregnancy is viable. But at the same time, I'm being realistic... I've told DD that sometimes things happen to babies and if they come out too early they won't make it. She seems to understand, and sometimes she sits on my lap when I'm here at MDC and she'll see an angel in a siggy and say "Oh, no, that mommy had a baby that died." However, she has been exposed to life and death from sort of a very early age because we rescue (and adopt out) orphaned kittens and sometimes they come to me way too weak and little and we have lost a couple of them -- sometimes I wonder how healthy it is for her to be exposed to that kind of reality, but she seems to be a pretty well adjusted little girl. Anyway, I just had to tell her I was pregnant this time (she didn't know we were pregnant in February, but she came up to me and said that she was going to be her daddy's movie buddy, and the little sister in my tummy was going to be my ski buddy:bigeyes). And again, in June, she told me I had a baby in my tummy.... so of course I had to let her know she was right. :)

I'm sorry this was so long. It's really helpful to me to say all this though.

I won't be doing doppler or u/s unless I lose the pregnancy signs I have now, or start to bleed. The cramps seem to be going away, so I'm relieved about that. It's hard to rely on my symptoms alone, but I'm not convinced about the safety of doppler/us... so it's all I've got for now. And then of course, there are times when the signs aren't so strong, like Llyra mentioned, and then I'm stressed.

If anyone made it this far through my post:lol , will anyone else be going through pregnancy after a loss but not doing doppler?

OK, all you little ones, GROW and STICK please!

[celesterra]

greetings, ladies.

i am also interested in this thread. my loss feels complex, since i have been struggling for 12 years (2 marriages) with infertility. my husband and i have been ttc for nearly six years now.

the first time i suffered a loss was in 2004. we were in a horrible car accident after a driver come into our lane and hit us head-on. the night before we had estimated that i was ovulating and had dtd... in the accident, my pelvis was broken in two, and i broke an arm. during the 3 weeks i was hospitalized, i feared i was pregnant, but of course the nurse blew it off as post-accident stress. to make a long story short, 2 weeks after i got home, i learned that we were experiencing an ectopic prenancy (7 weeks pg). i was so irrational, i pleaded with the doctor to just move the pregnancy to my uterus. so, not only did we lose the pregnancy,of course, but i ended up with a burst fallopian tube at 9 weeks. i have a c-sec scar from that lovely abdominal surgery.

after that, we started fertility treatment in 9/04. we have used all kinds of drugs and we've done IUI several times. i have PCOS, so that's our factor in fertility impairment.

we got pregnant last summer, and lost that one to a m/c at 9 weeks again - in September. after that, we did one more cycle and then took a break to re-group and heal. this is our very first cycle back, using the same injectable meds and IUI that got us a + last summer.

while i am really confident about the pregnancy, i am also falling prey to fear. i'm another tp checker. i also wish that the symptoms i am experiencing were constant - i can't wait to puke! people say i'm crazy, but it would be such a reassurance.

Jenny, i would love to just get through the first trimester w/o an u/s period. because i see a RE, they want to monitor with internal u/s and i just don't want to do that again. i feel deeply that it was part of the reason for our loss last fall. they'll want to ceck my ovaries, though, and i know they'll also want to check for multiples. i'm not very good at standing firm, but i feel so strongly about this.

i'm really glad to find you guys here, since it feels to me like i will be able to share more authentically in this kind of forum.

[trying for #1]

I would love a pregnancy after lost forum.. Ihad a m/c in 10/02 and I haven't been the same. Now that I'm pregnant again, I'm very paranoid.. I think it would help ease my mind.. Like the rest of the forums..:thumb

[raversangel]

hi all! i'm comming over from the ttc after loss thread...i had a m/c in may 06, i had had an unusual ultrasound a couple days before, so i was trying to prepare myself, but nothing really can prepare you for loosing a child...i had bacterial vaginosis after and went on meds for it and just recently got a yeast infection...(way tmi i know) and was about to go on diflucan (i have an open perscription for it) and told my dh i wanted to test to make sure (i only EVER get yeast infections the week i find out i'm pregnant...lol)..i'm only on cd26 so i wasn't expecting much, but wanted to make sure...and i got an instant :+! so i'm excited!! but extrememly scared at the same time...i have no clue on my edd b/c i haven't had a normal period since my m/c so i'm going off my last funky bleeding time...lol...so i guess my edd is around March 15th or so... :D

[ASusan]

Hi all,

I'd like to join you. My story is similar to Debi, in that I had an early miscarriage in February, just a week or so after I found out I was pregnant. It was on day 39 of my cycle. I'm at day 35 now, so if I can just make it through the next week, I'll start to feel a little better.


I know we're not supposed to chart temperatures after getting a BFP (supposedly they're all over the place and don't tell you anything); however, I did chart that pg, and it was a drop in temp that signaled the miscarriage coming on. I got a small drop this am, so, of course, I'm a little concerned.

My pg will be considered high risk, as I have lupus. However, the disease is VERY well controlled; I don't feel anything at the moment. Partially due to meds, and partially, I feel, to having done acupuncture for the past 6 months. I haven't had an acu treatment for about a month, but I think I'll schedule one for next week. If I *do* have another early mc, then acu will help move things along. If I'm still pg, well, I'm sure she'll find a place to put the needles!!

[cvillemama]

I'm so happy there's a forum for TP checkers! I had our son in May 04 with no complications or questions. Unfortunately, my coworker had a miscarriage at 22 weeks just prior to my giving birth...and that was the end of my pregnancy ignorance. Ignorance really is bliss. I wish I could return to that mindset, believing that nothing will happen to my baby.

I learned in February that a neighbor had miscarried at 14 weeks last year, and then in March, I joined the 44% (according to my midwife) of women who miscarry (and that's only the ones who knew they were pregnant!). I miscarried at 6 weeks, and vowed in her office to never poas again.

I have become a complete TP checker. I haven't poas still, but will be 6 weeks on Sunday if the sticky vibes keep working. Midwife said to call her Monday so I can go poas and listen for a heartbeat there. I called her to mention my absolute paranoia about going to the gym, having sex, doing anything that might possibly bring detriment to the cells working so hard to multiply in me. She calmly reassured me that women have to live a normal life, and babies will stick or won't, regardless of what we do or don't do.

So glad there's a place to share our paranoia.

[Leilalu]

I'm gonna go ahead and join in. I was in the Feb group, but am pretty sure Imiscarried. But since we are trying, I'm gonna move in here for awhile.:)
I think I was about 8- 9 weeks when I miscarried. Which was about 2 weeks ago or so. I am getting an appointment with my old OB to see what's going on with my body.

So, I'll be here:lurk:

I have a history of miscarrying before each of my pregnancies.

[ASusan]

I'm really, really worried this morning.

My temps are gradually going down (from a high of 98.8 on Sat to a low of 98.3 today). I KNOW that some of you will tell me to stop temping, but the drop in temps is one thing that alerted me to my miscarriage last time.

I also had very bad cramps that kept me awake from 3-5am. I've been having cramping all week, but these were different - more like when my miscarriage started last time (like really bad period cramps - constant and all over my abdomen).

Finally, I miscarried on day 39 last time, and I'm on day 36 today. So, I'm really, really concerned today. I guess the only thing I can do is wait...

At least my breasts are still sore!!! (That's one symptom I lost about 5 days before my last miscarriage.)

[lotusdebi]

:hug

:sticky

Thinking of you!

[Astromom]

Oh, Susan, you are in my thoughts!! I hope everything's ok!!

[raversangel]

ASusan - :hug i will definatly send sticky vibes your way!

ugh its hard not to worry...i never get symptoms so its not really something i can depend on ya know? i'm a big girl, so showing i'm pg doesn't happen till i'm 5months along or so, so i don't even have that as a comfort...i do get bouts of nausea and just now a 5min bought of sorness in the boobs (which is odd since i'm still bfing it feels like i'm letting down) but nothing constant...it makes it hard not to worry...but i have a good feeling about this one! i had been asking dh for a pg test for weeks b/c i swore i was pregnant...and i feel good...last time i was centered on a m/c and that something was wrong, and it was...but this time its different...

:sticky to EVERYONE!!

[paisley]

Thinking of you today Susan! :hug :sticky And I will be the one to say it, put your thermometer away. I had to force myself to do the same last week when my temps were dropping despite my blood hCG levels clearly doubling. My philosophy is that whatever is going to happen is already set in place, so it is up to us to enjoy what we so have and keep focused on the positive. Totally easier said than done but I think it's a good thing to aim for. And if you can't stop temping, I know there are a few ladies in the 'I'm Pregnant' forum (I think that's the one) who are a few weeks ahead of us, still temping and have posted their charts which do show fluctuations and drops in temps. I will try to find that for you later and post it here. Please keep us posted. :hug

I hope to be back soon with more personals when my little daycare dude takes his nap.

[paisley]

Ah, naptime. :)

Welcome to everyone! I'm glad that there are so many of us here to support each other. :grouphug

Llyra - :hug I have a friend IRL who experienced a 20wk loss. It was so hard because you're right - by that time you're feeling pretty safe. She is pregnant again and just passed her 20wk u/s with flying colors and now she finally feels like she can bond with this pregnancy. I know 19/20 weeks is a long ways away still but I hope that after that mark you will be able to breathe easier, if not before.

Astromom - :Hug to you too. I am also aiming to avoid doppler and u/s unless necessary (spotting, signs of multiples, etc.) for the same reason you are. Both my MW and the OB/fertility specialist I as seeing are very supportive of that decision, so it's nice not to have to put up a fight there. With the progesterone, I am supposed to supplement until the placenta takes over, which is at 8-9 or 10-12 weeks depending on who you ask. I can see how going off it might be a stressful time for me, but I have a few weeks until that all goes down. (I still have to figure out when to stop the baby aspirin, so if anyone has any advice on that I'm all ears.)

Celesterra - Wow Mama, you have been through so much. :hug I'm so sorry for your losses. I think the only thing worse than experiencing a loss is having to TTC for a long time to get there in the first place. Have you talked with your RE about skipping the u/s? Maybe you could bargain with them and only do an abdominal u/s if they insist that you have at least one. I'm not sure what the earliest date is for ab u/s to work, but I'm pretty sure it's in the 1st tri and the exposure risk is supposed to be less than vag u/s.


Shoot, he's awake again so that's as far as I'm going to get right now. But I do have more I want to say (naturally! :blah :wink) so hopefully I'll be back soon. :)

[celesterra]

paisley, you're so good with the personals... :D

i am having a little scare this evening... even though i should be thrilled. i got my beta back this afternoon - my first one this time... and it is 415. they want me back tomorrow to make sure it's doubling, and i have to say, i'm pretty scared. i did look up my numbers from last time and i should be very assured - last time my first beta was only 80. but still... the challenge of summoning this faith in my body and this pregnancy that is suddenly catching me by surprise.

i definitely will have to bargain with the doc about the u/s since i really feel strongly about it.

thanks for listening... it's nice to have you guys to talk to.

[raversangel]

ok, i take it back...the symptom bug hit me HARD today :fever: i have never had nausea this strong or this unforgiving...all i have to say is all meat is getting banned from this house today...it seems to trigger my nausea bad...the heartburn is getting there and i'm not wanting to eat...which if you knew me you would know something is wrong :lol and i DIED today...put the younger one down for a nap yawned and i was OUT...that never happens...that makes me feel so much more secure!!!!

:sticky :sticky :sticky

[paisley]

Trying for #1 - Hi and :hug. I remember answering your post in The One Thread about hCG. I'm so glad you're here with us March Mamas. :) Are you doing any further monitoring or tests? How do those results look so far?

Raversangel - I sort of know you from the TTC after loss thread. :wave Congrats on your short stay over there! What a rollercoaster ride these last couple months have been for you. If you are still dealing with the yeast, I recently used a homeopathic deal for yeast infections called Yeast-Away by Boiron (?). It worked for me but was way more messy than your average suppository so be prepared! The 7-day kit was ~$15 at my LHFS. And sorry that you feel crappy but yay for your new symptoms! :balloons

ASusan - Here's (http://www.mothering.com/discussions/showthread.php?t=478488) that thread for you with extended charting by pregnant peeps. How are you doing tonight? :hug

Cvillemama - Sorry for your loss. Mine were early too - 7wks and 5wks. Amen on ignorance being bliss. Sometimes I wish I could go back to that innocence of knowing that everything would be perfect with my baby. But OTOH, I think what I have been though and learned has helped make me a more understanding person when it comes to loss and trouble TTC. It is amazing how once you are introduced into the world of pregnancy loss, that you find so many women going through the same thing. I had no idea before I went through it myself.

Leilalu - Welcome! You can be our official voice of reason. How's that sound? When's your appt and are you thinking about running tests? I had some done this last cycle and certain ones are best done on certain CDs (days, not diapers ;)). I am by no means an expert, but I'm happy to share my knowledge with you if you'd like. PM me. :)

Celesterra - Thanks for the compliment! :love How many DPO were you when your hCG was drawn? If you are feeling nervous about it, what about waiting for the 2nd draw until 48 hours has passed? It does mean another day of that awful waiting and wondering but I've heard that 48 hours is the max acceptable time for doubling. That way you don't have to stress if your 24 hour draw comes back a little low or go in for a 3rd draw. I did the 48 instead of the 24 for the first time this cycle and it turned out really good for me because by doubling rate was 150% at 48 hours. Totally acceptable timeframe and rate but I think it would have scared me if I got the 24 hour draw back as 75%. Just an idea.

Lotusdebi - How are you doing today?


As for me, I am 5 weeks today. I feel like I've been pregnant for longer than that though! I suppose I have some symptoms - so tired, emotional, a little crampy, boobs hurt, and nausea. Hey that looks like a pretty good list once I type it out. :lol But I still sort of wish that there were more obvious signs. Perhaps a flashing neon sign that said 'pregnant!' on my lower abdomen? :innocent Here's to hoping that we're all kicking ourselves in a couple weeks for asking for more symptoms! :wink

And for everyone - Here's a little item for us to consider. I am thinking of changing the title of this thread. I feel a little bad about having this reminder of what could go wrong floating around on our DDC page. I just don't want to scare anyone who doesn't need to be scared. I hope that makes sense and doesn't sound bad - sometimes I can't quite get my thoughts into the right words. Anyway, I have two ideas. First is 'The PALS Thread'. (PALS standing for pregnancy after loss support). That one definitely has the air of secret societies and decoder rings. :kewl :lol The second idea is 'TP Checkers Anonymous' which totally cracks me up even though we're not very anonymous. :p So please cast your vote and feel free to nominate other ideas!

[lotusdebi]

Lotusdebi - How are you doing today?


Thanks for asking, paisley! You are so on top of things!
I'm not doing great. I'm about as far into this pregnancy as I was when I started miscarrying in the last one, so I'm paranoid. I woke up early today, rubbing my belly, saying, "Stick with me, baby. Stay with me. You are wanted and loved" over and over. I'm checking and rechecking pregnancy symptoms. I'm definitely paranoid. :(

As far as changing the name of the thread goes, I kinda like TP Checkers Anonymous. :p

[raversangel]

paisley - yeah, i'm on a final day of miconizal or however you spell it :lol i had to get help fast, i know this is waaaay tmi, but i was swollen to the point i couldn't walk...it was bad...and after the first dose all symptoms were gone...my ob said it was ok, i was kinda peeved b/c i really wanted to try to get rid of it a more natural way, but comfort won out...lol...i'm doing a bit better today...today is when i was due for af, and i'm feeling a little crampy, but not really, just a pressure in the area where i normally get af cramps...and everything is still high and tight, so i'm sure i'm good :thumb

[ASusan]

Thank you all so much for your support yesterday. It really meant a lot. I even had my DH read your posts. (He's a little leary about this "chat room" stuff, which is how he refers to it.) Reading my post, and then your replies, made him realize why I read these pages, and also that you're not a bunch of weirdos! (He's ultra-cautious about keeping private information private, and not taking advice from "strangers".)

My temp is back up to 98.6. I will probably temp through the weekend and then try to stop after that. Breasts are bigger than before, if that is possible. DH is happy about this, even though he can't touch them!

I have my first OB/midwife appointment on Tuesday. I told them I didn't need a long appointment, as I already had the lunch-meat lecture back in January.

The night I had my bad cramps, DH had a dream that I'm carrying a girl. He said that he met her. (My concern is that he always sees his dead relatives in his dreams, but he was smiling when he told me this on, so I guess it's all good.)

Paisley - Thanks for the chart links. I went looking for them yesterday, but wasn't successful in finding them.

Raversangel - I enthusiastically recommend garlic for yeast infections. Please forgive me if I've mentioned that to you before, but I'm VERY enthusiastic about it.

eta: I vote for the PALS Thread. I don't actually check the tp. I just look in my underwear. My spotting always seems to be enough to make a mess! (I had 4-5 days of "implantation spotting" for each pg.)

[Astromom]

Susan, so glad things are better!!

[Astromom]

Celesterra, you have been on such a long journey, and your strength is so inspiring! I hope that this pregnancy goes smoothly for you! I hope you are able to get what you want regarding no u/s!! Maybe your doctors would be satisfied waiting until a bit later, like the 2nd trimester?

trying for #1, I'm sorry for your loss. Congratulations on your pregnancy, may it be an uneventful one!

raversangel, I'm so sorry for your recent loss! I'm so glad you are able to join us here in the March DDC! By the way, I think in the roll-call thread you didn't mention your EDD, but I see it's the 15th here. Would you like me to edit the rc thread to show it? I think I have it as "sometime in March" right now. And yay for those strong symptoms hitting, even if it is rough! There's nothing quite like that nausea to bring on the secure feeling!

cvillemama, I know what you mean about the paranoia of doing ANYTHING in fear of harming the little one! This early time especially seems so fragile and delicate. I hope you have a good appt with your midwife Monday!

Leilalu, I am so sorry for your loss! My sister-in-law also has a history of miscarriage before each of her pregnancies. She has had 5 children, and she has miscarried before every one of them. She has always gone on to get pregnant the next cycle and carry to term. I hope you will also be able to!

Paisley, no clue on the baby aspirin! I'm glad you aren't having to put up a fight with your OB about the doppler/us. Are you going to see the OB and midwife concurrently throughout your pregnancy? Your list of symptoms is long and reassuring! But yes, I wouldn't mind a flashing neon sign myself. Actually, can I just trade my nausea in for one of those? As for thread titles, either one works for me. :)

Lotusdebi, oh that is a hard time. Keep on sending those positive vibes to your little one!! :)

[pianojazzgirl]

Hi everyone! I recognize some of you from the TTC after a loss thread. :)

Well I had a mc at 8 wks pg in April.... and today I just found out I'm pg again! So glad to find you guys for support!

Hugs and stickydust for everyone! :hug :hug :hug

[paisley]

Pianojazzgirl!!! Yay!!!! :balloons :jumpers:

Back later with more, not supposed to be online right now, shhhh... ;)

[pianojazzgirl]

Thanks hun! :D :D :D

[pianojazzgirl]

Anyway, I have two ideas. First is 'The PALS Thread'. (PALS standing for pregnancy after loss support). That one definitely has the air of secret societies and decoder rings. :kewl :lol The second idea is 'TP Checkers Anonymous' which totally cracks me up even though we're not very anonymous. :p So please cast your vote and feel free to nominate other ideas!

I like both ideas (TP checkers annon made me giggle!). I guess I'd vote for PALS though - gotta love an acronym! lol

[raversangel]

astromom - actually you can just leave it as sometime in march, b/c i have a sneaking suspicion that when i saw the doc june 2nd (enlarged uterus and thick walls) that i had JUST gotten preggers again...b/c i never had a period after that....the only time i bled was from my m/c...so lets just leave it till i go see a ob and get an 'official' date :lol

pianojazzgirl - YAY!! welcome!!

[pianojazzgirl]

Thanks raversangel! :)

[raversangel]

ASusan - YAY! seriously, give your thermometer to your dh and have him hide it!! that is so cool that your dh had that dream! i'm sure it is a good sign :thumb

[lotusdebi]

So, I was symptom-free yesterday. And that freaked me out. My first sign of impending miscarriage last time was losing my pregnancy symptoms. But, then, around 9:30 at night, I started feeling really nauseated! And I had a twinge, which I hadn't had since the 4th. I was 3 hours late taking my last 3 prenatals of the day, and I'm really wondering if my prenatals are keeping me from experiencing nausea.
I'm only occasionally feeling pregnant. Mostly I'm still waiting before I get too connected to the idea of being pregnant. But, the more symptoms I feel, the happier I am!

[PrinceE&LsMom]

With my last pregnancy I had plenty of morning sickness and exhaustion so I decided to tell my kids I was pregnant when I was 9 weeks along. The baby was lost at 12 weeks 2 days and they were devastated. They saw blood, they saw me leave an ambulance, they were crushed. Now over 4 months later they say things like "I want my baby," or "I'm sad our baby died" at least 2x a week. I just can't put them through that again so I probably won't tell them until I'm least 14 weeks along or maybe even later.

[chrissy]

:lurk:

[Arwyn]

Don't think we don't see you looking there, missy Chrissy! :nono

:lol

I'm mostly butting in 'cause I saw Chrissy's name as the most recent post, and I'm totally stalking her. :mischief

Many many years ago as a teen I had an early miscarriage (I saw the conceptus, about a quarter of an inch long), but I hadn't known I was pregnant, and it would have been an unwanted pregnancy anyway, so I never feel like I belong in threads like these. But I gotta say, if you change it to TPCAnon, I'll definitely be poking my nose in more, 'cause I'm obsessive about checking my TP (especially because I actually have been spotting, very sparse and dark though). So PALs might be better just for that reason. :)

I too have been asking baby to stick and feel much happier now that I have more symptoms, especially because I have suspected low progesterone, but hadn't done anything to correct it before I got pregnant. Whoda thunk I'd be glad to be nauseas?

[raversangel]

ASusan - how exactly would garlic work? i'm done with the treatment of miconizole and still feel the itchies and i'm not doing another one of those...blech...

[DecemberSun]

Hi all. :wave
At this time last year I was m/c'ing. (About 10 weeks.) I had only been off the Nuva Ring a month, and I kinda had a feeling something was amiss from the very beginning with that pregnancy. Never got sick, never had sore boobs, had some cramping and spotting on and off. This time around I had only been off the pill for a month, and I had some spotting when af was expected... But I still got a positive test! I have very sore boobs and I have been having some waves of nausea today, so I'm :fingersx:. Every time I feel cramps I wonder when I will feel "the gush". :(

So, yeah, I have been known to check the old TP. :thumb

:dust and sticky vibes to all you mamas... Good luck, and thanks for starting this thread!

[paisley]

PrinceE&LsMom - Wow, what an intense experience - for you and for your kids. :hug I'm so sorry you had to go through all that. How are you feeling so far this time around?

Raversangel - Not Astromom ;), but what I've heard about the garlic is that you peel it and place a clove up in your yoni. Don't cut or scrape the clove though or it will burn. Eating a lot of garlic would probably help as well as the usual probiotics, cutting out sugar, carbs, and so on.

DecemberSun - Welcome and congrats to you! Your symptoms sound good so far. I've been trying to think of that uterine sensation more as a "stretching to accommodate new healthy life" kind of feeling rather than calling it cramps and that seems to calm me a bit. But you're right, it isn't the most comforting feeling.

Lotusdebi - Interesting about the possible prenatal connection. Didn't you say in the other thread that you are taking Rainbow Light? I know they put herbs in there, maybe they add ginger? I saw a friend yesterday and she reminded me that a lot of women don't start truly feeling like crap until the sixth week. So I have put a temporary hold on wishing for more pronounced symptoms until then. :wink

Celesterra - Did you get the results of your 2nd beta back?

Chrissy - I see you there!! Still got a cushy spot for you on this wagon here. :love :love

Arwyn - :wave How's the move? I missed you!

We went to the farmer's market today and oh, how I love summer! We came home with a bunch of amazing heirloom tomatoes, sweet corn, figs, tangerines, strawberries, artichokes (for the lunch I'm making my mw - 1st appt on Tuesday!), and cucumbers. Everything was fresh, beautiful and organic. It felt so good to be buying all that great food knowing that I would be using it to help nourish the little life inside me. :heartbeat

For our thread title, it looks as if things are swaying in favor of PALS, right? Any objections, last minute nominations, or calls for recounts? I know there is a joke to be had here about voting and pregnant chads but I can't quite put it together. :lol Hope everyone is having a good night!

[Arwyn]

Paisley - we better get that cushy spot dusted off and spruced up (maybe put a bucket next to it), 'cause I just KNOW she's gonna be more than munchin' popcorn in this DDC come Monday!

I can't remember what the garlic recommendation was for, but garlic is a great generic antibiotic, antiviral, antifungal... Well recommended for killing off strep, whether in the throat or the yoni. Paisley got the instructions just right. (Haven't tried it myself - haven't needed to :fingersx: - but it's been written up a couple times in Midwifery Today.)

There is some ginger in RLCompletePre (too tired to type that all out! :lol), but I don't know if it's enough to do anything. :shrug

The move was... stressful. And tiring. And not even over! The people before us had more stuff than they said they did (as did we, I'm sure), so another truck will be there on Monday. Of course, I won't, so here's hoping it all goes smoothly... And I'm (even more) extremely tired - jet lag and all that. I try not to think about the radiation exposure my bean just got and what a horrible mother I already am, but the blissful thought of finally having my king size incredibly comfortable foam bed back definitely helps with that.

A little more on topic, today DP and I had PIV sex (penis-in-vagina) for the first time since getting a :+. Had a little bit of bright spotting after, which is to be expected, of course. But is anyone else thinking about all the prostaglandins in semen and the uterine spasms of orgasm as, for the first time, not necessarily good?? I know it's complete paranoia, or at least my brain knows that, but it does enter in to my thinking about making love now. :( Is it just me?

[chrissy]

paisley and arwyn, you mamas are so sweet! :love :love :love

i'm afraid i'm going to be the big downer on this thread. i just feel that this is sure to end badly. my temp was down this morning- though still above coverline and i did wake early, but still. :( and i took 2 more tests- 1 was - , the other only very faintly +. so still waiting, waiting, waiting. no more spotting though. so first thing tomorrow i'll call the dr. i wonder if low progesterone could cause low hcg, you know like if you don't have enough progesterone the baby just won't grow fast enough? i don't know. i hope that if low progesterone is the issue that tomorrow won't be too late to clear it up.

arwyn, so is PIV a midwife's term or did you just make it up? either way, it cracks me up! :lol i too worry about having PIV sex now. not so bad for me b/c i haven't been too interested but poor poor dh. i'm sorry you are having spotting and worrying about it. in my first pregnancy (with my big healthy 4.5 year old to show for it) i had lots of spotting and even bleeding on and off in my first trimester. it was very scary but everything turned out just fine! sending calming vibes your way~~~~ (they're mail order though b/c i'm fresh out of calm here right about now :lol)

paisley, wow what a wonderful farmer's market trip! sounds delicious- all of it. what are you going to make for your lucky midwife?

so, i guess my intro here is that i have 2 living children, noah is 4 (will be 5 in november) and lilah is 21 mos (will be 2 in october). i was due with our third this coming october but miscarried at 8.5 weeks, back in mid march. i'm still nursing lilah. i get regular acupuncture (2x a week lately).

well, i've got to go and figure out a way to put all of this out of my mind for the rest of the day. ha!!! but at least i have to try.

[pianojazzgirl]

Oh Chrissy, I've got fingers and toes crossed for you hun!!! :hug

Arwyn - yeah, I find PIV (lol) sex a bit scary too. I think everything this pg is going to be scary... sigh...

Paisley - mmmmm.... jealous of your farmer's market trip! :)

[lotusdebi]

Yep, Arwyn's right, my vitamin bottle says: Ginger [root] Fresh Juice 10:1 Extract
It's part of the "Gentle Prenatal Blend" which also includes Red Raspberry [leaf] 4:1 Extract and Chamomile [flower] 4:1 Extract. The Gentle Prenatal Blend is 89 mg (equivalent to 500 mg of herbal powder).
I have no idea what that means. But, if it's helping, I guess I don't really care!

Oh, the prenatal bottle also has: Vitamin B-6 - 20 mg - 800%DV so that's probably helping, too. Serving size is 6 tablets, which is what I'm taking. :blah


Good luck, Chrissy! :fingersx:

[pianojazzgirl]

Feeling so crampy today. :( It's making me scared. :(

[lotusdebi]

:hug Thinking of you, Kate! :sticky

[chrissy]

kate, i'm hoping it's that little bean burrowing in there really well. :hug

[raversangel]

paisley and arwyn - thanx! so um any suggestions on retrieval? :lol or does the whole clove just break down? do you know how long you leave it in?

arwyn - yeah PIV sex has yet to happen in this household b/c of my yeast infection...my dh is really yeasty as well and i could smell it on him so we won't be dtd for a while yet...but yeah, its definatly there in the back of my mind...

chrissy - where in NC are you? we are moving there in a couple days! it would be nice to have a preggo buddy there w/me!

things are switching up daily with me...i got really naueas when i was due for af (couple days ago) and sick as everything, then it passed yesterday and i was just STARVING, and having dreams about eating food...lol...how sad is that? i'm starting to stress out a bit, we are moving literally across the US in two days!! i can't believe it! i'm excited and freaked that everything will work out right :D

[chrissy]

raversangel, i'm in greensboro. where are you going to be?

[pianojazzgirl]

Thanks Chrissy and lotusdebi. :)

[paisley]

Arwyn - A bucket! :rotflmao

Chrissy - I posted on the 6+ thread too, but try to hang in there. :Hug I felt similar feeling this time around before I got my test results back too. (And then I got the results back and I kept thinking it was a lab error. :rolleyes) As far as temping, put that thermometer away. I posted a link somewhere on page 2 (at the top maybe?) for ASusan to a thread with links for ff charts kept by women who are pg and a few weeks ahead of us. They have fluctuations and temp drops too. For P/hCG, the connection is that there has to be enough P for the embryo to implant and hang out and thus produce more hCG (or at least that's my understanding. someone please correct if I'm wrong).

Raversangel - Ah yes, retrieval. My best advice is to dig deep and bear down. :o I launched my little clove way up next to my cervix and it was a little interesting to fish out. It didn't really break down after about 24 hours. Good luck on your move! I hope you wind up near Chrissy because she is one wonderful Mama!

Pianojazzgirl - :hug Me too. I wonder when this stretching/crampy feeling stops. Soon would be good. :)

[raversangel]

raversangel, i'm in greensboro. where are you going to be?

YYYAAAAYYY!! i'm going to be in mooresville!! (dh is going to UTI NASCAR devision) so we need to find a place and stuff, but i think we are ony an hour or so apart!! i remember my dh was going to transfer to delux checks in greensboro but we just didn't want the drive from mooresville to greensboro every day :D

paisley - :lol i'll just give that job to my dh, i'm sure he'd have fun with retreival...lol...so only 24hrs is all it takes? wow, i'm going garlic all the way next time!!

[paisley]

paisley - :lol i'll just give that job to my dh, i'm sure he'd have fun with retreival...lol...so only 24hrs is all it takes? wow, i'm going garlic all the way next time!!
Sorry - I should have been more clear. I only did it for 24 hours and then switched to that homeopathic kit I was talking about earlier. Do some searches (yay search function!) in health and healing or I'm pregnant about yeast and garlic. I can't remember what the protocol was for garlic. Sorry for any false hopes! :o

[Arwyn]

The protocol (it's a tentative protocol, there's a midwife trying to research what gets the best results) for GBS is to do one clove a night for three nights, removing each morning. And yea, either wrap a thin layer of guaze around it to which you tie a string, making a stinky little tampon, or just push/pull it out.

For yeast infections I also recommend a topical application of high-quality powdered probiotics. Make a paste with a quarter to one teaspoon of the powder and a couple drops of water, then apply to the affected areas. Leave on over night, shower as usual in the morning. It's sticky, but it works!

PIV sex is actually a sex educators' term, I believe. I didn't make it up, but I use it because I love it (the term I mean! well, that too :lol). There are so many different kinds of sex - PIV is just one, and as a bisexual sex-positive linguist it annoys the crap out of me to hear "sex" being used only for that one type. Thus, PIV sex.

Thanks for the mail order calm, Chrissy! I'll definitely be breeding it and sending some back your way. :love I think I actually got it today, because I'm rather more optimistic today. I'm getting used to the light spotting and cramping, and I keep feeling more and more pregnant, so unless something worse comes along, I think I can deal with this ok.

Kate - :hug I've been cramping off and on since before the LBP (little bitty positive :lol). If I end up miscarrying, well, this advice is for naught, but I'm doing pretty ok so far. I think it's pretty normal, if rather scary. :hug

Oh, and while my right breast has had a dark blue pokey outty vein for several days, this morning my left did too. :D It's so silly, but that makes me so happy! :lol

[Llyra]

I think I need to borrow that bucket!

I can't change diapers anymore-- every time DD poops, I hurl. It's like an automatic process. I've even started changing her diapers in the bathroom, because I know it's coming. The smell is just way more than I can handle. I wish I could put her back on breastmilk just for the next two months, to give my poor stomach a break. At least then it wouldn't stink so badly.

It's weird though. I get this strange sort of excitement when I get sick, or when smells make me gag, or when my boobs ache so badly that I wanna scream. At least I know baby's still sticking. I would never have imagined I'd be so happy to puke!

chrissy, :Hug and lots of sticky baby vibes for you!

[Arwyn]

Aw geez, Llyra! I'm laughing because I love, really! :lol

No puking here quite yet. :1praying: it stays away... my best friend/sisterish type person is due in Oct, and got away with nausea but no vomit. I sooooo wanna be like her!

[raversangel]

Llyra - hopefully your nausea will get better in the next week! i keep a roll of saltine crackers handy in the house (like literally one roll in each room) and munch on em all day and it helps a ton to stave off the strong inpulses to retch :hug

not much going on here...this is d-day for us, packing up the trailer and riding on out to NC!! i'm excited and freaked that everything will work out ok, but mostly excited...and trying to figure out how to get my parents over here to help pack so i don't have to lift the washer and dryer and stuff, b/c we aren't going to tell ANYONE till i'm in the second tri...

so i won't be on very much over the next week! i'll try to check in as much as possible! :hug

:sticky

[chrissy]

well mamas, it's over for me. i sincerely sincerely hope and pray that i am the only one of us to have to leave this ddc. i wish you all absolutely beautiful, peaceful pregnancies and births.

[lotusdebi]

Oh, chrissy! I'm so sorry! :hug :crying
Sending healing vibes and lots of love your way!

[celesterra]

chrissy, i'm so so sorry for your loss. :grouphug :crying

[Llyra]

Oh, chrissy, I'm so sorry. :Hug

[celesterra]

Celesterra - Did you get the results of your 2nd beta back?

:innocent sorry to keep you waiting, and thank you for asking, paisley. i should have listened about the 48 hr beta because as it was i got completely freaked out when i got the "24 hr" results and haven't quite recovered. my last pregnancy had problems right from that 2nd beta.

so, the nurse called, and of course the level was NOT supposed to double in 24 hours, but she'd SAID it, so when she said it was up from 415 to 530 (22hrs), i almost died. BUT she said that she's very happy with it and told me not to worry.

i spent the whole weekend worrying.

i feel somewhat better today, but still cannot keep those dark thoughts from entering my mind. also, the fluxuating symptoms are so scary - i am have stopped eating papaya and drinking "pregnancy tea" just so i can FEEL the symptoms more! i'd rather feel nauseus than not at this point.

today i am 5 weeks. it's still so very early... i can't wait to move on from this stage.

[Arwyn]

Oh Chrissy, no! :hug :crying

[DecemberSun]

:hug to chrissy... :(

My aunt is a Nurse Practitioner who specializes in high-risk pregnancies. She told me that 1 in every 7 pregnancies result in a miscarriage. I think she was trying to make me feel better, but it actually made me feel worse because statistically some of our pregnancies may not progress... I promise not to be the pessimistic party pooper, though. I am really :fingersx: that the bad news has ended for this group!

I am so very sorry for your loss, chrissy... I hope you and your DH can have fun TTC again when you have healed from this. :innocent

[paisley]

Ugh, I spotted a bit this morning. Just got back from a beta and P check, hopefully will have the results by the end of the day. Dh is out of town until Saturday. Where's the trying-to-hold-it-together smilie?

[Arwyn]

:hug Paisley. It's ok to lose it a little bit if you need to, but I fully believe everything will be ok for you.

I've been spotting (EXTREMELY lightly for the last couple days, but more earlier, including some brighter red and one small clot) for nearly two weeks now. But I feel more pregnant than ever (and my BBT is still nice and high ;) ). It'll be ok. :hug

And I'm so sorry your husband is out of town while you're going through this! That makes it that much harder, I know. I started spotting shortly before I left for Indiana, and I was completely convinced I was going to miscarry while out there and completely bereft of any support (we're not telling friends yet, so the people I was staying with didn't know). It was so scary. :hug

[paisley]

Thanks for the love and reassuring words, Arwyn. :love

Got my beta back - 34,000 at 27DPO. Phew! Doc said it wasn't necessary to go back for the 2nd draw with a number like that. So I am relieved that everything is ok, but this isn't very reassuring for the singleton theory. :lol Averages for single pregnancies at 27DPO are more like 9500. :bigeyes Ruh-roh.

[celesterra]

paisley, SUCH GREAT NEWS! HOORAY!!!

well, I'm next up. tomorrow we go in for another blood draw and 1st u/s. i'm still not too keen on doing the u/s so early - i'm only 5w2d today, so what's the point, really? i'll talk to the doc about it tomorrow. i am considering putting dh on the afternoon cell phone duty - i dont want to get another call about the beta. i was thinking to ask them not even to tell me.

i just want to quit all this monitoring and be pregnant. :o

[Arwyn]

Celeste - oh boy do I understand that. Although I haven't done anything really to monitor this pregnancy (other than temping :duck:), but I feel like sometime in the last week I decided (not consciously) that I wasn't going to be tentative about the pregnancy anymore - I'm just pregnant. And that rocks. :D

Paisley and others with progesterone experience - so I finally got the results of my 6dpo prog. saliva test, with low (but not insanely low) results. 71, with a normal of 100-600. Dr had been ready to prescribe sublingual prog., but then I told her about being pregnant, and it was like watching her brain kinda break. :lol She had to shift gears really rapidly, and ended up deciding to call and talk to her favorite pharmacist before we decide whether to supplement or anything. Anyway, I'm not sure - on the one hand, I'm a as-few-meds-as-possible kind o'gal, and was going to go the vitex route for the short LP (which is discontinued after a BFP), but on the other hand, I don't want to lose the pregnancy because the corpus luteum can't quite keep up the progesterone long enough for the placenta to take over, and correcting hormonal imbalances is just a good idea in general... Help? Advice, experience, suggestions?

[ASusan]

Chrissy - I'm sorry your little one didn't make it. Stay strong

Raversangel - I put the clove of garlic in like an ob tampon (only without a string). YOu can string a thread on it if you wish for retrieval help, but mine worked it's way down over 6 hhrs and was fairly easy to get out. I changed it every 4-6 hours, for about 3 days. I nicked the clove (afterr the first one, which went in whole without nicks), with progressively more nicks each time. Some people find that nicking releases too much juice, which burns. That wasn't the case with me. Felt fine. Worked REALLY well. I love garlic!

Arwyn - no help with the progesterone, only to say that they put me on it today. I took my first dose around noon...


Update on me - It was a day of appointments. Midwife in the am - she was great. Spared me the lunchmeat lecture and got down to business. Took blood for BSU today, and will take it again Thursday and Saturday. Going in for a transvaginal ultrasound on Thurs at 6w1d. Started progesterone orally. Still very few symtoms...She said I had a very nice chart and suggested I keep temping.


My parents are coming to help me pack for my move. They were planning to come tomorrow (Wed) but I called Mom late this afternoon to ask if she would come to a medical appt w/ me on Thurs (DH is 6+ hrs away). She and Dad rearranged their plans, then she asked what kind of appointment.
me: "an ultrasound"
Mom: "of...? what kind of ultrasound?"
me: "a vaginal ultrasound"
Mom: "for...?
me: "Well, hopefully we'll get to hear a little heartbeat, but it may be too early for that."
Mom: "OH!" (general excitement). "That's not my specialty" (Mom's an RN)
me: "well, brush up, because I need you to pay attention, ask questions, and take notes"
Mom: "Oh, this is so exciting. I think I'll keep quiet about it for a bit." (I think she was not going to tell dad...not sure why or why not. Dad's driving down here, too, but he won't go in for the ultrasound! He'll probably stay at my house and take a nap,)

I also told my best friend, who told me a few weeks ago that she was 4 weeks. She was cramping, and nervous, so she called me for reassurance. I haven't talked with her since, so I started the phone call asking for updates and being chatty. "So, you're how many weeks along?" "8 1/2" "Oh, so you just 2 1/2 weeks ahead of me." Then, we griped about lunch meat and hot showers.

I'll post more later - after my ultrasound, probably . Thanks for indulging my chattiness tonight.

ETA - the rest of my appts:

late am = last haircut at the salon I love

noon = acupuncturist. I was so wired that I didn't fall asleep. I always fall asleep. She said i was stronger this time around, that my pulse was stronger. However, it wasn't strong enough to tell me if it is a girl or a boy. I think I'll try to schedule another appt on Monday. If the ultrasound/HSG info is bad, she can help me move on with a miscarriage. If it's good news, then she can help with that, too.

mid-afternoon orthopaedist. They couldn't do an x-ray of my foot, but they discharged me anyway. The dr barely GLANCED at my foot. Just asked me, "the left one, was it?" and when I asked for an update on my PT prescription, he said he didn't think I needed any more PT. So, I guess my foot is healed! (OK, I'm still wrapping it in an ace under my sock, and I"m still a little careful wth it. I still take calcium and vitamin D...)

[Arwyn]

OK, not that I eat it ever anyway, 'cause it's just not good stuff, but what's with the lunchmeat prohibition? And hot showers?

Oh, and Paisley - can I just laugh at you a little? :mischief Actually, I was laughing so hard when I read your "ruh-roh" that DP, who was in the other room, asked me what was so funny. :lol Anyway, uh, CONGRATS! :D

[ASusan]

OK. the lunch meat prohibition comes from the possibility of listerosis. You should heat the lunchmeat to steaming before eating it. At my first prenatal appt last Jan, the doctor spent an hour with me, talking about my family history, genetic testing, diet, etc. A full 8 minutes - more than 10% of our time together - was spent talking about not eating lunch meat. When I asked if wasn't that (avoiding lunch meat) going overboard, she lectured me a little more and told me that there were three cases (or did she say 3 outbreaks) of listerosis three counties over last fall.

When I said to the midwife today, "You can spare me the lunchmeat lecture. I already had it last time I was here." She said that there were other things she was more concerned about, like all the fish advisories, which go beyond mercury. Farm raised salmon can have more (or fewer) PCBs, depending on where it was raised...She also said that she liked Having Faith. She is concerned about the fish advisories, because of the great benefits of Omega 3s. She asked if I was supplementing with Omega 3s. (I am.)

Somewhere along the way, I remember being satisfied with the idea that lunchmeat was ok if it was from a clean, reputable deli. Around here, Wegmans fits the bill for that. (A student of mine with OCD worked there. She was super-impressed with their food prep hygiene practices. This was a woman who used a new toothbrush every time she brushed.) However, after I move, Wegmans will be a thing of the past for me. I am so sad.

The prohibition on hot showers comes from the warnings about not overheating your body (raising your core temp) because of the potential for birth defects (something with the ear? I'd have to look it up; I can't remember). My girlfriend doesn't take hot showers because of this concern. I would avoid a really hot bath or a hot tub, but I don't think my concern extends to hot showers. I don't think my hot water heater (a) is turned up THAT high, and (B) has enough water for an extended hot shower that would result in a core temp raise.

[Arwyn]

Oh. Well, I knowingly and happily ate raw sushi the other day - I shudder to think what that doctor would say to me. :D With poor quality lunch meat, I'd be more worried about the chemicals they put in it, nitrates etc. Well, and there's a big difference between high quality fresh sushi and poor quality old lunch meat in terms of risks of infection. :shrug

As for hot showers, there was a study quoted in I believe Midwifery Today an issue or two ago that found that even being in a hot tub for more than two hours failed to raise core body temperature enough to be a problem - and the women all wanted to get out before then because they were uncomfortable. I don't have the article with me, so I can't quote numbers, but the gist was that the dangers of hot tubs are completely overrated. So that's another old doctors' tale we can safely discount. :p

[lotusdebi]

I had a couple drops of red blood in the middle of the night. This was after a day of feeling sharpish pains where I've been believing the baby-to-be implanted. I still feel pinching there.
So, I'm scared. Worried. Freaking out. Checking TP even more. I'm 6 weeks and 2 days pregnant today. I want to stay pregnant!!!
I did have PIV sex last night, before the bleeding. That was after the pain all day. But, I wonder if maybe it had something to do with the blood.
I'm just really scared.

[celesterra]

i'm saying good bye. best of pregnancies to you all.

[Astromom]

Chrissy, Oh no, I'm so sorry for your loss! :hug

Oh Celesterra :hug -- I'm so sad you are saying goodbye!

I'm thinking of both of you in this difficult time. :(

[Astromom]

I'm feeling bad here because I'm very behind in life and therefore am behind in this thread. But reading through now it looks like there are several of you spotting and I want you all to know that I am thinking the strongest sticky vibes ever to all of you!!!

:sticky

[lotusdebi]

:hug celesterra
I'm sorry, honey! :crying

[Leilalu]

I am so sorry I somehow lost this thread:bag:

Ok, off to read:Sheepish:


I haven't made the appt yet, sigh, but I neede to. i just hate appointments that could be filled with a confimation of bad news.

I totally FEEL pregnant. But, I don't test well, so I got a negative. I just don't get it.
Ok, off to read and get an appt!

[paisley]

Celesterra - No! :( I'm so sorry. :hug

Lotusdebi - :hug It could very well have been the PIV that caused the slight bleeding.

[SweetPeaSD]

I too am very anxious right now! Can't wait to get past the main mc worry period!! I had an early miscarriage in 10/05 and we went through the experience of having to un-tell everyone about the baby... It was sooooo hard emotionally, but I grew closer to my whole extended family because of it, I never would have known how common it was so close to home! So when I found out about this pregnancy we decided to tell everyone regardless of the outcome - it was such a joy to see that positive again! I had skipped a period in May, I think it might have been a chemical pregnancy, but then AF in June again and voila! big + last week! :) I am hoping beyond hope that next March I will be having a beautiful baby! Until then I just have to LOVE love love my DD (9/04) and stay positive (literally too! lol)!!

Wishing you all tons of sticky vibes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[lotusdebi]

I'm feeling better now. Thank you!
My first symptoms of miscarriage before were losing my pregnancy symptoms, and then some very slight spotting. I had some spotting last night. And my pregnancy symptoms haven't been strong. Plus, I haven't had to deal with insomnia for the past couple of nights, and then I woke up this morning with neither nausea nor feeling like I was starving. So, I freaked out.
But, now I've got reflux. I've got nausea. I've got that feeling of extreme hunger. So, I think I'm okay!

I hope...

[Arwyn]

Oh celesterra - :hug :hug :hug I'm so sorry.

Lotusdebi - PIV sex can cause light red bleeding (did for me). And some cramping is normal. So I think you're fine! :thumb

Isn't it amazing how thankful we can be for nausea? :lol

[lotusdebi]

Isn't it amazing how thankful we can be for nausea? :lol

It is! I've actually put off taking my prenatals for a couple of hours a few times now just so I could be sure of the nausea! :o

[DecemberSun]

Poor celesterra... :(

:dust Sending sticky vibes and spreading baby dust around to all you mamas! I am still having light cramping on and off (er, growing pains...) so I am :fingersx: for a :sticky!!!

[paisley]

Welcome Sweetpea! Hope your stay here is long and uneventful. :)

Lotusdebi - How far along are you? I just hit 6wks today and all of a sudden am so ill.


Can everyone muster up some extra special love and positive vibes for Celesterra tonight? Please? :dust

[bemommy]

I'm not even willing to admit myself pregnant yet. I will admit to positive pregnancy tests. . but I can't think of myself truly pregnant yet. Does that make sense?

Anyway, HI, I'm Be. I lve in Massachusetts with DH and DD. We've been trying for #2 for between 1.5-2 years. For a lot of that time I was breastfeeding and that had a huge impact on my fertility. I've had 2 early losses one in October and one in May that were devastating to me. I'm on progesterone supplements now and playing the waiting game. My first beta level was good (I go for the second today) but even with supplements my progesterone level is "weird". My script is being upped and I'll have another level taken next week.

Now I'm going to go back and read as much of this thread as I can. Looking forward to getting to know you all. Hope I get to stick around :) (I can't bring myself to post to the roll call thread for this DDC, at least not yet)

[lotusdebi]

Paisley - I'm only two days ahead of you, due March 5. :)

[paisley]

Bemommy - Welcome! I was lurking a bit on the 12+ thread for Celesterra's updates and I was hoping that you would come play with us soon. :) It makes total sense that you're not feeling mentally pregnant yet. TTC for a long time helps make it a little unbelievable and then with prior losses, I think it's natural to be a bit guarded, kwim? I hit 6wks yesterday and had a great beta earlier this week, and just then was finally able to admit/feel sort of pregnant. What are you doing for P? This is my first cycle doing sublingual P. I use ProgonB by Bezwecken, you can get it online for about $30/month. Last time I got tested, my P was at 4.57 17DPO in the middle of an early miscarriage. With the ProgonB, my 7DPO was 32.1 and my 14DPO (pregnant) draw the same cycle was 44. Looking forward to getting to know you! :)

[bemommy]

Paisley - Thank you so much for the warm welcome. The progesterone is screwy. On CD21 (or 4 DPO) my progesterone level was 24.5. An excellent number. I had started taking supplements on CD20 (when I knew for sure that I had O'ed) it was a vaginal gel. . procheive, once a day at night. When my progesterone level came back at 11 at 15 DPO, they upped my script. I now have vaginal suppositories each 100mg to do twice a day. Maybe they'll help, maybe not.

I'm waiting to hear about my second beta.

[celesterra]

hi ladies... :innocent i've had such a horrific 36 hours. i have been posting the updates on the ttc thread in 12+, like paisley mentioned. it looks like all is not lost at all, but i'm going to lurk until we know for sure. the good news is here (http://light-of-unity.livejournal.com). i just didn't want to bring all of that drama to this thread, which is so much about hope and embracing our pregnancies as we can.

be :hug i totally know where you are. how was your beta today??

[bemommy]

be :hug i totally know where you are. how was your beta today??

I was pretty much where you were today. . Sofa city sweetheart :loveeyes: Sure I went out for my beta and to pick up the new script oh and to get the oil changed in the car. . Then I came home and treated myself to and afternoon of lounging and movies (DD is at her Oma's for the evening).

Don't know what my beta was today. The results haven't come in yet :dizzy:

I don't really like this cautiously optimistic crap. . It kinda sucks. I can do cautious and I can kinda do optimistic. . I'm not sure I can combine them.

[Ben's Mommy]

Hello mamas. May I join you? I just got my bfp this morning and am over the moon! I've been trying for SO long!

My first baby passed away 3 days after he was born. I am praying that I can bring this little one home. It just feel so surreal right now. Ok, I'm off to read up on our ddc and try and catch up on the thread here. :)

[Astromom]

Sandy, I am so glad you have joined our DDC! Congratulations!!! I lurked a bit in the other PAL thread so I know this has been a long ttc journey for you and I'm so happy for you. I am so very sorry about little Ben.

bemommy -- hoping for a great beta for you!!

oh celeste, I am thinking of you! This must be incredibly difficult to be going through. I am so glad to hear that there is still hope!!

SweetPeaSD, welcome and congratulations! I also have been spreading the joy of the positive regardless of the outcome! :)

Mamas, I'm so sorry for all your previous losses. :( Here are some more sticky vibes for everyone! :sticky

[DecemberSun]

Ok, here's my cautiously opstimistically hopeful vibes to all the MamaPals:

:fingersx: :+ :+ :+ :sticky :sticky :sticky :surprise: :storkgirl :storkboy :belly :belly :belly :grouphug :dust

[paisley]

Wahoo Sandy!! :love :love So glad you're here! :jumpers:

[Ben's Mommy]

Wahoo Sandy!! :love :love So glad you're here! :jumpers:


Me too! Thanks for the warm welcome mamas. I feel so behind on this ddc already. I can't wait to get to know each and every one of you! :love

[pianojazzgirl]

Yay Sandy!!!! Congratulations! :D So glad to see you here!

Celesterra - thinking of you and keeping fingers and toes crossed!


I've been away for 4 days at the inlaws - still have more reading to catch up with all my PALS. Welcome to any and all newcomers! :) Sticky dust for everyone!!!! :heartbeat

[bemommy]

My second beta came back. . 350 at 17 DPO. It almost doubled in just less than 48 hours. The OB office is sounding more optimistic.

I do another beta on Monday. Then another progesterone level on Wednesday. The nurse even talked about an u/s at 7 weeks. The last 2 pregnancies have't made it to 7 weeks.

Wow, ok. I'll have to admit now that I'm pregnant. I just hope to stay that way.

[Astromom]

Got my beta back - 34,000 at 27DPO. Phew! Doc said it wasn't necessary to go back for the 2nd draw with a number like that. So I am relieved that everything is ok, but this isn't very reassuring for the singleton theory. :lol Averages for single pregnancies at 27DPO are more like 9500. :bigeyes Ruh-roh.

Paisley, when I saw your numbers my eyes did ---> :bigeyes and my jaw did ---> :dropjaw on your behalf! :lol Wow... twins... that would be, well, FUN, right?!

And I had to tell ya... we're getting tons of twin vibes over here ourselves! No betas to back it up, but I did pull 20 sets of twin cherries out of the cherry bag this morning. :lol

[pianojazzgirl]

Oooo... someone around here's gotta be having twins! :wink

[Arwyn]

I call notme!

[pianojazzgirl]

:lol

[Ben's Mommy]

I think twins would be cool, but I don't know if I could handle it. But unless it's a freak accident, I'm sure I'll have a singleton.

Double the fun, double the :dizzy: :dizzy:

[ASusan]

I'm trying to stay hopeful, but it looks very much like this one will not stick around. I had an ultrasound on Thurs, which should have been exactly 6 weeks by my calculation. They saw a sac, and dated it at 5 weeks. (5 weeks was exactly when I was awake for 2 hours in the night with bad cramping - perhaps it stopped developing then?) My betas on Tues and Thurs were 5200 and 7000, respectively. Very slow rise. I had another blood draw today and will find out the numbers late this afternoon or tomorrow. There are 2 (3?) possible scenerios at this point:

1. The numbers continue to rise slowly, in which case they'll want to do another ultrasound in 10 days-2 weeks.

2. The numbers are flat or decreasing, in which it's over, just not coming out! If this is the case, I wish my body would get moving.

3. The numbers shoot up and we keep going.

Either way, I'll see my acupuncturist on Monday if she can get me in. I've lost any symptoms I had before. My cramping - both what I consider to be "good" cramping (sharp and lower pelvis) anbd bad, period-like cramping (that preceeded my last miscarriage) - has gone away completely. This makes me think that it's over, AND my body has given up trying to get it out on its own. If the rise is still occurring, an ultrasound in two weeks will be logistically difficult, see below.

This is all complicated by the fact that I'm in the middle of a move. Here's the story (which I won't even try to keep it short). My DH is in DC until the end of July. I'm in upstate NY. We will both be living in Ohio. My parents came Thurs to help me pack. (Yes, this was the same day as my ultrasound; Mom came with me.) DH and I had already packed a lot of my small house, but there was a LOT left to do. Movers came yesterday to load the truck. It was great having someone else do that part!! I'm in an empty house, preparing to get as much of it cleaned today before the temps go into the 90s tomorrow (no ac). I still have to pack my office and lab - about 2 car-loads, I estimate. Mostly books, files and paper. I'll do that on Mon and Tues. On Wed., I'll visit my parents to help them with their garage sale (first one in over 27 years). Then, I hope that my dad will help me move my office/lab to Ohio. I have to meet my moving truck on the 26th. We hope that DH's moving truck can show up on the 27th. (That's about the time they'd want that second ultrasound. I don't yet have a health care provider in OH. I *think* my new insurance wil be in effect, though.) They told DH yesterday that it would be the 26th, but it seems a bit much to have 2 trucks delivering in the same day to a smallish apartment. I think DH wants me to be in DC that weekend (28-30) to attend his "good-bye" celebration and a small college reunion. We drive to Atlanta for a week after that. (for the first week in August to visit his family.) We then drive to Ohio and fly from Ohio to NH on the 9th to visit my family. We're taking a road trip to Prince Edward Island with my grandmother for 10 days. We fly back to Ohio on the 19th. I start my new job on the 21st. Elves will unpack all of our boxes while we are traveling and have the apartment sparkling clean upon our return. Perhaps it's best I won't be facing first trimester exhaustion for the next 6 weeks.

I still don't have a place for my cat to live - she can't move to OH with me because DH is allergic.

(ETA - I can't edit the title - it should read, "All about me." I guess "Akk" pretty much sums it up, though.)

[paisley]

ASusan - How are you doing? :hug I saw your post in my inbox right before the servers went down but I couldn't get here fast enough to post. I've been thinking about you a lot and sending you lots of good vibes. What a hectic time in your life and then to have to worry about all this. I'm really hoping for good news. Please update when you can. :hug

[Arwyn]

Oh no! :( I was so afraid something like that would happen while MDC was down... Here's hoping you were wrong! :fingersx:

Give us an update!

How's everyone else? I stopped spotting before the server update, and am doing just dandy - all nice and nauseas and super tired and PREGNANT! :bouncy

[paisley]

Oh yeah, I forgot to say than I've been sicker than all hell. Actually puked yesterday, yum. I felt a little better this morning but that of course made me super paranoid that something was wrong, until this afternoon when I started feeling like poo again. :rolleyes

Arwyn - Clean out your Pm box! ;)

[Arwyn]

Aw geez, girl! Some of us don't have the 5gazillion for-pay PM box some OTHER fancy shmancy so-and-so's have! :lol

Anyway, done! :p

[paisley]

Well maybe some of you should spring for the giant box! :mischief

[Arwyn]

So, Paisley, what's the word on that twin issue?






:mischief

[paisley]

The word is shhhhh (aka denial). :lol

[lotusdebi]

:hug Thinking of you, ASusan!

[bemommy]

Ah, it's back. I've been jonesing for MDC.

My betas are good
15 DPO 190
17 DPO 350
21 DPO 2784

I go for a progesterone test today. Hope everyone is doing well!

[paisley]

Yay Be! Looking good with those betas. How are you feeling?

[Astromom]

Susan, I'm sorry you're having to deal with a move on top of all this!! I'm keeping my fingers crossed for the third scenario!!

[bemommy]

I feel pretty good paisley.

More tired than usual and either super hungry or totally off food. Pretty much how I felt when preggie with DD.

[Arwyn]

So what's the consensus on the progesterone issue? My ND is bugging me to make a decision. My prog was low but not superlow and I'm torn between thinking on the one hand that everything is going well, so why mess with it? and on the other I'd do anything to reduce my chances losing the pregnancy (which I'm not entirely convinced progesterone supplementation will help with), and that fixing hormonal imbalances is a good idea in general...

Thoughts?

[paisley]

Arwyn - I've heard that the placenta takes over P production between 8-12 weeks. And you're 7 weeks now, right? So maybe you're close enough that you'll be ok. I've also heard that P needs to be started asap after O to have its full effect. The best way to figure out what is going on would be to do some testing and/or an ultrasound but I'm pretty sure you don't swing that way anyway. ;) If, if, something wasn't going right though, I think starting it now could be too little too late. Not positive about that though. Ok, so did I help or confuse you more? :shy If you are stressing about it and worried that not taking it would be doing the wrong thing, then I'd just go ahead and do it because you wouldn't be on it for long anyway and to the best of my knowledge it can't hurt.

[ILoveMySofie]

Hello everyone. I would like to officialy move over here. I got a :+
on the 15th :-)
This was our first try after our loss. I feel incredibly blessed and hope to stay that way for 9 months.

thanks in advance for all the support :innocent

[ASusan]

Hi All,

Just a quick post to let you all know that I'm still in the game! The third round of beta was higher (I don't know my DPO, because the ultrasound was a week off - or I was a week off!!). Anyway, here's the numbers:

Tues, 7/11 5200
Thurs, 7/13 7000
Sat, 7/15 13,391

They're doing an ultrasound (probably) next week as a follow-up. I say "probably" because I'll be at a new OB's office in Ohio (post-move). I have an initial appt with a Nurse Practitioner on Tues for history and bloodwork, and an appt with the OB on Wedesday. They do have ultrasound equipment in the office, so I would think they would use it...

I have had some ms. Ate $5 worth of raspberries for breakfast on Monday, then lost them 15 minutes later. Went to the acupuncturist Monday afternoon, and she stimulated some points to help with ms. It's fine, as long as I eat a little bit all day long.

It's still incredibly hectic in my life. I'm writing from my parents' house, where I['m helping them with their second yard-sale. (The first was 27 years ago, when my mother was just pregnant with my sister!) We had just gotten everything out onto tables and were pricing, when there was a thundershower. ..

I drive to Ohio on Monday, have doctors appointments on Tues and Wed. My moving truck comes sometime on Wed., and DH's moving truck comes on either Thurs or Fri. We drive to DC on Fri...then to Atlanta on Sunday or Monday.

Hope you're all doing well!!

[Arwyn]

Oh Susan that's wonderful!!! So glad to hear it! :bouncy

Good luck with the moves - we are NOT having fun with ours. :irked:

[Astromom]

Susan, yaaaayyy!

That's so great!

[pianojazzgirl]

Yay Susan!!! :)

Well I've missed you guys! I've had TWO scary paranoid preggo things happen to me since MDC went on hiatus. First of all my friend thought she had rubella and I'm not immune to it. Eeek! Turns out she got what her dr said completely wrong and it was that her antibodies for rubella were low and she needed a vaccine (not sure how she got that one so wrong! lol).

Then today we were driving to the lake and we went past this farm where they were spraying horrible pesticides. We don't have air conditioning and so all the windows were down and the wind was blowing it right into our car. Ack! I'm still kind of freaking out about that since I know pesticide exposure during first tri is NOT GOOD... but I'm trying to relax and think about how it's prolonged exposure that's shown to cause birth defects and miscarriages, and how I was only exposed for a very short time.

I am finding it very hard not to go off the paranoid deep end this pg. :(

[pianojazzgirl]

Hello everyone. I would like to officialy move over here. I got a :+
on the 15th :-)
This was our first try after our loss. I feel incredibly blessed and hope to stay that way for 9 months.

thanks in advance for all the support :innocent

Congratulations and welcome! :D

[bemommy]

Ugh, what a freakin day!!

Called the OB office this am to 1) find out my progesterone results from Wednesday and 2) Make an appointment for a 7 week ultrasound.

Made the appointment then headed down to my mom's for the day. On my way I decided to call and check voice mail. There were 2 messages from the nurse at the Ob's. . that they wanted me in for an ultrasound TODAY and that IF that went well we were going to change the progesterone supplements.

Thankfully DD was in an excellent mood and was barely phased about the change of plans. Turned around and headed to the doctor's office and called DH and asked if he could leave work (I really didn't want to be alone with Libby if things were bad).

DD happily went to the child care room while I had the ultrasound. Which was fine. . too early for fetal pole or heartbeat but nice yolk sac, good lining. It all looked good.

Then I met with the NP, my blood serum progesterone is basically in the toilet. But everything else looks pretty good so far (ugh). I've now been upgraded to injectable progesterone (wonderfully not covered by insurance). DH needed to learn how to give me the injections. Never thought I would be the proud owner of a sharps container.

I'm ready for a nap!!!!

[Astromom]

Ugh, Be, I wish the OB's office hadn't worded their message like that -- wonder why they felt they needed to maximize stress levels? Good luck with the injectable progesterone -- sorry you're having to go through that. :hug But yay that the U/S was good!!

[DecemberSun]

I woke up this morning sick... I think I am officially pregnant? I won't be convinced until I feel actual kicking though. :lol

:fingersx: for all the struggling mamas... Hang in there. Come springtime we'll be posting in the Life With a Babe forum in a "March 2007 Babies" thread. :love

[PrinceE&LsMom]

I need your prayers ladies. Last week at 4weeks 4 days my hcg level was at 1701.6 and then at 4 weeks 6 weeks 3884.2 which is good. Progesterone was at 30.4 which is also good. On Thursday I had some very light pink spotting a few times throughout the day. Nothing Friday then this morning bright red :(. I am freaking out of course!! Hoping my cervix is just irritated from my yeast infection???

[lotusdebi]

:hug Thinking of you, Prince E&LsMom! :fingersx:

[pianojazzgirl]

PrinceE&L'sMom - :hug :hug :hug You're in my thoughts hun. :fingersx:

[Ben's Mommy]

My prayers are with you mama. :heartbeat I hope everything turns out ok.

[Astromom]

Come springtime we'll be posting in the Life With a Babe forum in a "March 2007 Babies" thread. :love

Awww, you totally made me smile sooo big with that comment! :love

[Astromom]

PrinceE&LsMom, I hope that the spotting is nothing!! :hug

[celesterra]

hi ladies... :innocent i'm coming out of my self-imposed lurkdom.

apparently my doctor's prognosis from 2 weeks ago was incorrect... i'm still pregnant. :duck: i'll be 7 weeks on wednesday and would love to re-join you if you'll have me.

[shalena]

Omg celesterra!



YAY!! I'm so glad you are still here! :love

[Mavournin]

Oh Celeste. I am so happy to see you here. You've been on my mind for weeks.

[Astromom]

Yaaayyyy Celeste!!!! Great news!!!!

[celesterra]

Oh Celeste. I am so happy to see you here. You've been on my mind for weeks.

Mav, thanks so much. Actually your comment at some point about spotting through your previous pregnancy has helped me a lot. I've been thinking of YOU too!

I can't honestly say that I'm out of the woods, but until I have an actual m/c I am assuming that everything is going to be fine. I have opted to stop going in for those stupid ultrasounds. I'm still spotting... every day. :irked:

thanks for the warm welcomes... I've had my eye on all of you! :love

[Arwyn]

YAY Celeste!!!!

I got to nibble on my 3mo niece this weekend, for the very first time - oh my goddess can we say BABY LUST?? I was just blissed out on the thought that in a year that would be ME sitting there NIPing in front of my whole family with the most beautiful baby in the world. :love

And then my brother saw the pics of the :+ :+ on my phone, and now the two people I most wanted to wait to tell know. :eyesroll But at least they're being mum about it. I haven't confirmed anything, they haven't said anything, but as we were saying goodbye, my brother was extra solicitious, and kept glancing down at my belly while saying "Now you take care of yourself... And take care of your DP so he can take care of you [significant glance]." Oy. We're still sticking to our original plan of telling my family officially in September, when I'm staying with my folks for a week. I'll be about 14 weeks, and with any luck showing at least a smidge. :fingersx:

[paisley]

Celeste!!! :Kiss

[ILoveMySofie]

PrinceE&LsMom- hope all is well with you.

Celeste, hi. I just wanted to tell you that in my previous pregnancy i spotted for at least two weeks! :sticky


I go to see my doctor tomorrow. I am incredibly nervous. I just want to see that u/s and to see that all is the way it is supposed to be. I am counting the minutes until my appoitment...

[bemommy]

Celeste - so incredibly happy to see you here.

[pianojazzgirl]

Wow Celeste - I'm so happy for you!

[ILoveMySofie]

:moon




i couldnt find the icon for "bump" so figured this was just as nice.


:lol

[PrinceE&LsMom]

Hello again. Well that bleeding I had on Saturday lasted about 5 hours and then absolutely nothing since???? It was never enough to make it to the pad but I would wipe 4-5xs and see plenty of bright red. I went ahead and scheduled my 7 week u/s which I normally would NOT do but any little peace of mind I can get at this point is priceless.

[DecemberSun]

I can't get in to see my OB until September 1st! That's how booked they are! :irked: The receptionist said "OK, so that's 2:30 on Sept. 1st, and you'll get your annual exam and they'll confirm your prgenancy." Um, hello, I'll probably already know by then, idiot! :lol I have been feeling milldy nauseas lately, and tired, so I'm convinced (for now) that I am pregnant. I m/c last time at 10 weeks, so after 12 weeks I think I can relax. :thumb I'll be about 14 weeks by the time I finally get in to my OB. All I really want is an u/s around 20 weeks to determine the sex, and someone available to treat me for preterm labor if it happens again. I really like my doctor and the NP at the office, so I'll just have to wait I suppose...

I am 7 weeks 3 days now so moving along nicely (I hope!). :)

[ASusan]

Hi All,

I'm sorry I havn't been around to be more supportive. I have been in the middle of moving, and nowhere near a computer, let alone one with internet access. After tomorrow, same thing for about a month.

An update on me: I had my second ultrasound yesterday. I like my new OB in my new city. He saw a yolk sac and a fetal pole, but no heartbeat. At this point, they would have liked to see a heartbeat. The U/S dated me at 5 weeks, 6 days, +/- 2 days. So, in the 13 days since my last u/s (which dated me at 5 weeks), I've made 6 days of progress. Not good.

The dr said that he's not yet able to say that it's over, and I have another u/s scheduled for the 8th of August. He generously squeezed me into his schedule, as I'm going to be in town for only a day. (We're doing a ton of traveling in August.) So, there's not much I can do but wait and see...and I'm drinking organic whole milk. (For some reason, DH thinks whole milk is the key, so I'm drinking it!)

I hope you are all doing well, avoiding the worst of ms, and getting all the naps you need.

Susan

[paisley]

Susan - :hug Ugh, the 8th of August. That seems so far away. I'm thinking good thoughts and sending positive vibes your way. :hug

[lotusdebi]

:hug Thinking of you, Susan.

[celesterra]

Susan, the uncertainty is really terrible - I'm sorry to hear that this is unfolding like it is. :grouphug I hope by August 8th your little babe will pop right up on the ultrasound screen!!!

[celesterra]

How about updates from the rest?

I've been feeling rather shy about posting, since my own situation remains unclear. I haven't been back to the doc for more u/s this week - I am just waiting this out. I feel too vulnerable by the daily brown spotting to allow another u/s. The symptoms are still with me, though... and the spotting isn't ever red, and no cramps... :dizzy:

paisley, did you get my pm last week?

[paisley]

paisley, did you get my pm last week?
Yes but I've been a real flake about writing back. :bag: Sometimes I get frustrated because there's so much I want to say but I type so slow. Just know that I have been sending you love from afar and that I will probably get a chance to hog the computer tonight and write you back. :love

[celesterra]

:innocent no prob! you're pregnant! :wink it's the perfect excuse :lol

don't worry about it.

How ARE you???

[bemommy]

:wave Hello all

Susan - sorry to hear about the uncertainty. It's a difficult storm to weather.
:hugs

[bemommy]

Wanted to post an update on me.

Went for the second u/s today and saw Speck's lovely little flickering heart. What a huge relief. So wonderful to finally be able to think of myself as pregnant. I'll be getting the daily shots for awhile and go for another progesterone level on Tuesday.

But, I'm ready to embrace it. . pregnancy, the exsitence of Speck. Lovin' it!

[pianojazzgirl]

Hi everyone!

Susan - :hug

Well, here I am almost 7wks pg. I am so damn paranoid this pg. Everyday I find something new to obsess about. I think I need a lobotomy....

[Astromom]

Be -- oh that's wonderful!

Celeste -- :hug It sounds so promising, since you have the symptoms still, and no cramps!

pianojazzgirl -- Ugh, I hate the paranoia!! :hug

I'm a little over 9 weeks today. I'm sicker than ever, and if it's like DD's pregnancy then this will be my worst week and then I'll gradually start feeling better after I hit 10 weeks. I felt great at 12 weeks with her, and as much as I'm looking forward to that moment, it was nerve-wracking for me because I couldn't feel her yet and we don't do doppler. Always something to worry about, no matter what the stage. However, I figure this time I'll be able to better follow the growth of my uterus to make sure all is well during that time. It's not as immediate as a nice kick, but it's something.

[DecemberSun]

Yes, I'd love to feel the kicks, too. My mom asked me when I'll feel more secure about the pregnancy and I told her "When I feel some movement!"

I am still here... Still pregnant, I think... Eight weeks today and counting. :love

[Arwyn]

Every night, DP puts his head on my belly, and "listens" to the baby. He says he's waiting to get kicked in the head - it's the next thing he's most looking forward to. :love

[pianojazzgirl]

Yes, I'd love to feel the kicks, too. My mom asked me when I'll feel more secure about the pregnancy and I told her "When I feel some movement!"


I feel exactly the same way.

[ILoveMySofie]

I too feel like I just cannot wait to feel movement. I dream about that day so much!
Unfortunately for me, that will also open up a whole new level of worry since I will be checking for movement obsessively at all times. Because of how I lost my angel baby...and since it was almost at the end of my pregnancy that pretty much leaves me the entire pregnancy to be worried. Really sucks.

Im trying to prepare myself every single day for this. I cant lie-im very scared.:dizzy:

[Astromom]

ILoveMySofie, :hug :hug :hug

[pianojazzgirl]

I too feel like I just cannot wait to feel movement. I dream about that day so much!
Unfortunately for me, that will also open up a whole new level of worry since I will be checking for movement obsessively at all times. Because of how I lost my angel baby...and since it was almost at the end of my pregnancy that pretty much leaves me the entire pregnancy to be worried. Really sucks.

Im trying to prepare myself every single day for this. I cant lie-im very scared.:dizzy:

:hug :hug :hug

I think I'll be the same way. I came so close to losing my dd when I was 37.5 wks pg. She just stopped moving one day. We went to the hospital and her heartrate had dropped so low that they rushed me for an immediate emergency c-section. They never found a reason for her distress either. I am going to have that in the back of my mind until this baby is born safely.

[Ben's Mommy]

Because of how I lost my angel baby...and since it was almost at the end of my pregnancy that pretty much leaves me the entire pregnancy to be worried. Really sucks.


Ditto. :( Although I got all the way thru the pg, so that leaves me just a bit more time to worry! I think I'll have my big sigh of relief when I get to take my baby home with me! :o Man we all are going to have a rough 7+ months to go, aren't we? :dizzy:

[ILoveMySofie]

thank you all for the hugs.

Sandy I must say im afraid it will indeed be a bit rough. I know its crazy to think about this now but i can already see myself staying up all night too just watching the baby sleep.

[Ben's Mommy]

thank you all for the hugs.

Sandy I must say im afraid it will indeed be a bit rough. I know its crazy to think about this now but i can already see myself staying up all night too just watching the baby sleep.


Oh YES! All night, all day and then some. I can already see those dark circles forming under my eyes! :o

[JennyClaire]

If anyone made it this far through my post:lol , will anyone else be going through pregnancy after a loss but not doing doppler?


Me! Like you, I will not have any kind of U/S during the 1st trimester. Even bleeding (without pain) will not cause me to "check." At 6 weeks along, there's nothing they can do even if there's loss! And I have big concerns about the use of ultrasounds.

I didn't know what PALS stood for, that's why I haven't dropped by sooner. :shy I will catch up later, but I wanted to say "hi" and subscribe now.

My name is Jenny, and I have a daughter (14) and a son (2 next week). Between those two, I had a miscarriage at 8 weeks in 2003 (a little :yangel conceived on Christmas Day).

I was so worried during my pregnancy with DS because I had bright red spotting for several days, and cramping, (DH and I cried and greived the loss of that pregnancy too) but he's running around the house as I type. :duck:

[pianojazzgirl]

Welcome to the thread Jenny! :) Wishing for a Happy and Healthy 9 months for you! :)

[JennyClaire]

Thank you Kate!

The only thing I could bring myself to eat tonight was hot and sour soup (not homeade). I think it must have had MSG in it, because now I have a splitting headache, and I NEVER get bad headaches. Ugh! Trying not to worry about the babe. I swear I worry about things that most people haven't even thought of ---- like ------

x-rays aren't safe during pregnancy, but what about those metal detectors at the airport? Or, do you get even worse amounts of radiation from flying itself? DD is going away to school in September, and I want to feel like it's safe to got visit whenever she needs me.

During my last pregnancy, I actually asked them to hand search me so I wouldn't have to walk throught the metal detector. They acted like I was crazy, but obliged.

And if saunas and hot baths MAY be dangerous, what about drinking tea or eating soup. That always raises my temps. And the weather's been pretty hot, and we don't have A/C......

Thanks for letting me worry here, ladies ---- everyone else would think me insane -- if they don't already!
:nut

[Arwyn]

Actually, hot tubs ARE SAFE. Honest, I swear. There was a very good study quoted in Midwifery Today earlier this year that said that in a 104* tub, it took something like 2-4 HOURS for a woman's body temp to raise even half a degree. And all the women WANTED to get out before then. Raised temps aren't even remotely dangerous until AT LEAST over 100. Hot tubs are safe! (Well, maybe not with the chlorine, but that's a different topic. :lol)

We're mammals - it really takes a lot to raise our core temp significantly. Yes, if it's 110 degrees where you are and you're dehydrated, I might worry, but more because of the risk of passing out than of damaging the baby.

And I don't think you're insane at all, Jenny, and if it makes you feel better to avoid hot tubs and saunas, by all means do so. It's just not evidence based (like much of OB recommendations - it was a good theory, but isn't supported by science).

[Arwyn]

Oh, and the radiation, I just don't want to think about. I did two cross country plane trips, involving two planes each, at about 3 weeks past ovulation (there was just no way around it, short of selling all our stuff in Indiana or having DP quit so he could do the trip). So I'm very LALALAAAA I CAN'T HEAR YOU on that topic. :lol

[paisley]

Welcome Jenny! Sorry about the cryptic title. Our secret decoder rings are backordered ;), but I'm glad you found us!

Sandy and ILoveMySofie - Hugs to both of you. We need a giant cosmic fast forward button so we can all get to our safe points. :hug

I'll be 9 weeks on Wednesday. My nausea has gone way down since I started eating wheat again last week so of course that's making me worry a bit. It does feel nice not to feel so sick, but then what if that's not a good sign... Oy. :nut

[Astromom]

JennyClaire, I understand what you mean -- I don't think it's odd at all to worry about things like extra radiation when you fly. I had to fly for a business trip a few days after ovulation and I must have spent a couple of hours researching that exact topic! Eventually it came down to benefit vs risk -- the benefit of not losing my job outweighed the risk of a brief 2 hr flight. Like Arwyn -- she didn't have a choice either. Although I have to admit, I hate flying anyway and at one point right before the trip I said to my husband "Oh forget it. I'm quitting. Can we afford that?" :lol

Aw, Paisley, :hug. That nausea is such a comfort in a way. Sending peaceful thoughts your way.

What I found with DD was that I never really felt safe until she hit 1 year old. First trimester, second trimester, third trimester, being born -- none of those were safe points for me. When I felt the first kicks, all it did was reassure me that things were ok up to that point. Same with the first heartbeat on the fetoscope. I still always worried for the future. So I figure the same thing will happen this time