Why Can't People Just Be Supportive?

[Cathi]

I have never had good luck when it comes to choosing a midwife.
I guess I got the bad apples of the bunch, not just once but several times. Even now as I am planning my dream birth I am getting flack from certified midwives about the safety of a homebirth after ceserean. You would think those would be the most supportive and believing in birth, but sadly in my experience thus far certified midwives have no passion, only the same perspective as OBs.

I understand getting heat from regular people I meet in real life or on message boards. They don't have the knowledge about homebirth safety versus hospital dangers, and most of them have never experienced a csection or the grief it causes. So I just consider them ignorant. They have a right to their opinion, but I don't think it's right for them to tell me I'm making the wrong choice for my family.

Why does no one support VBACs? Why does no one support HBACs? I never thought it would be this difficult to do something so natural. It makes me so sad that no one around me believes in my body's ability to birth a child. :crying

[chichimama]

Well, I for one believe it the safety of VBAC and the safety of HBAC. Most of the people that think VBAC isn't safe are either talking out of ignorance or fear, or a little of both. Same with those who think that homebirth isn't safe.

The studies and the numbers are out there to support both VBAC (not induced) and homebirth.

CNMs have a nursing background before they learn midwifery, so they have the medical background just like an OB. That is probably why they don't think it is safe.

I had a direct entry midwife at my homebirth after cesarean this summer. She wasn't scared, and I felt much safer with her than with an OB or a CNM in a hospital.

I for one believe in you. I know there are a ton of people who do, you just have to find them. But, the only person you need to worry about believing in you, is YOU. Then you can make decisions based on your confidence and anyone else can just move aside.

:)

[chichimama]

Well, I for one believe it the safety of VBAC and the safety of HBAC. Most of the people that think VBAC isn't safe are either talking out of ignorance or fear, or a little of both. Same with those who think that homebirth isn't safe.

The studies and the numbers are out there to support both VBAC (not induced) and homebirth.

CNMs have a nursing background before they learn midwifery, so they have the medical background just like an OB. That is probably why they don't think it is safe.

I had a direct entry midwife at my homebirth after cesarean this summer. She wasn't scared, and I felt much safer with her than with an OB or a CNM in a hospital.

I for one believe in you. I know there are a ton of people who do, you just have to find them. But, the only person you need to worry about believing in you, is YOU. Then you can make decisions based on your confidence and anyone else can just move aside.

:)

[weesej]

As an apprentice homebirth midwife, I have attended a rather large % of VBAC moms. I very much believe and see often that VBAC moms can birth their babes in the safety of thier homes!!:) If the midwives you are talking to are unsupportive, FIND ANOTHER MIDWIFE! The supportive ones are out there and you do not want to surround yourself with doubting careproviders whether they call themselves a midwife or an obstetrician. Are you in an illegal state? I might be able to put out an e-mail on midwifery boards to help you locate a supportive careprovider.

[RainCityMama]

I believe in you :)
I also believe in the safety of VBAC and personally I believe that HBAC is even safer!
I was lucky to find a fantastic midwife who attended me in the birth of my VBAC baby at home - she believed in me 100% and had faith in my bodies ability to give birth- EVEN after a c-section :thumb

I found my midwife by joining ICAN, I met a lot of other women in my shoes (preparing for VBAC/ recovering from the trauma of c-section) and they pointed me in the right direction as far as finding the right care provider for me. There are still some wonderful midwives out there, you just need to look hard and trust your instincts.

Don't let the naysayers get you down - You can do this!

[weesej]

OMG i'm so sorry, I thought my computer had gone offline when I was trying to send those. Could the moderator delete them??????

[indiegirl]

i deleted the extra posts !

Jesse