What about lying about your last period?

[mamabird32]

I am wondering if anyone has lied to their midwife or doctor when asked about your last period?
Ds was "2 weeks" overdue and not even attempting to come out and when I went in for a checkup dr said let's schedule that c-section.
Even though I know the exact date I conceived.....I don't want to have a
C again so I have thought about fibbing the date.
Has anyone did this? Is this common?
Thanks

[frogleymom]

I've never lied about it before... but I'd consider it in the future.

I don't think I need to this time, my LMP was March 7th... but my cycles have been totally out of whack from breastfeeding. My last :I was April 18th and I got my first :+ April 25th, so I'm calculating based on that... any doctor or midwife is just going to have to trust me this time...

Emily

[happymomma]

If I was going to an OB or someone that I thought would induce I would absolutely lie! I was induced with my first and had 43 hours of labor. Not something I care to repeat ever again.

[*Lisa*]

I was induced with my first child, and it wasn't close to ideal. I'm not, however, going to lie to my midwife or doctor. At this point, I'm thinking that if I feel strongly about avoiding induction at 42 weeks (assuming that this one is overdue),then I'll just decline the induction. It's not like they can MAKE you do it, KWIM?

I think that doctors and midwives are great for providing information that will help you make an informed decision about what to do with your child. The ideal situation is a partnership, where you work together to insure the best outcome. That's harder to achieve if you don't have an open and honest relationship with the doctor of midwife.

Do you live in a place where there are multiple OB's and/or midwives? If so, I would try to meet with some and tell them your concerns up front. Go with the one that is most willing to work with you.

[DoulaLMT]

In this state, MWs can still attend out-of-hospital births up to 43 weeks. VERY few women go over 43 weeks (if their due date is accurate in the first place), and I'm thinking at that point acupuncture or herbs or SOMETHING ought to help jump start things.

[paniscus]

I would lie if it fits when you conceived better. With my last pregnancy I had a 5 week cycle (ovulated at week 3). So I put my due date a week later than "the wheel". I was seeing cnms and they were still pressuring me starting at 40 weeks. I went in and they looked at the baby, measured fluid, did fetal monitoring, etc and all was fine with both of us but they were still threatening to induce. We were pretty firm that we didn't want that and one mw said that if we went over 42 weeks they would not deliver with us - basically kick us out of the practice. I was SO upset and did so much crying. Turned out I delivered a little after 42 weeks (actually went into labor on the date I "had" to or else) but I wouldn't want to go through that again.

[mamabird32]

I just didn't want to have to start out a relationship with lying.
At 41 weeks is when I got scared...
I tried eveything I knew to do to go into labor.
From having sex 3xs a day, drinking beer, to relax me,
Black Cohosh tincture, castor oil, TWICE!!
Yuck!
Also, last time, ds was plannned, but I don't remember the date conceived or my last period, so really it was taking the doctors word on how far along I was.
Could not have been too accurate?!
Anyways, thanks for the opinions...
:)

[MCatLvrMom2A&X]

If you know for a fact that your edd based on LMP will be off because you o'ed really late in the cycle it is better to lie about LMP to make it line up with the little wheel they use. If it is only going to make a day or 2 of difference there really isnt a point.

Some woman will ovualate very late and it can make as much as 2 weeks difference on EDD. So they would start being presured to induce a full 2 weeks before the baby was really due. For those woman I would definatly consider lying. Especially if you go to a MW/Dr. who has that 42 week cut off rule. Because you would only be 40 weeks and as we all know many woman go over 40 weeks and it is perfectly normal.

[moondiapers]

I think I'd tell truthfully about the date of conception or ovulation. That's on their little wheel too :). But if previous experience tells me my babies come late I'd fugde the ovulation date a bit too.

[Free Thinker]

I don't think this is a good idea at all. What if you go early? If you go at 38 weeks, they will think you are only 36. This could lead to more monitoring of baby, ect. If you did ovulate later, then tell your OB/midwife and have them measure from that date. If they don't want to, find another Dr. With my second had only O'd once between the 2 girls, and while I knew I did O, I didn't write the date down. They did an early US and used that date. She was born 4 days before her EDD. The earlier US are supposed to be more accurate for EDD. This time I know I o'd on time or within a day or so (I think I o'd twice) so I am confident in my EDD.

[Cullens_Girl]

I would definitely lie if I remembered when my LMP was. I'm just going on what I *think* was my LMP.

[SeaDoula]

I am studying to be a midwife, and lying to your care provider is never a good solution. I also however am pregnant, and do ovulate later than the wheel says. I will let my midwife know, and if they do not go by that date (because I chart, so it is factual) then I will go with another provider. If your provider doesn't listen to you, or pressures you to do something, switch...I wouldn't want that person present at my birth if I couldn't trust them...to trust what I know about my body.

Also, a note about midwives in WA state where I live...Midwives could lose their insurance & their license by attending births after 42 weeks. It is not that they don't want to, but in order to maintain a standard of safety, they must adhere to those guidelines. Although many babies are born healthy & fine after 42 weeks, there is always the risk of the placenta not working as well then.

I just wanted to shed some light on why some midwives might have to turn you away. I know it would break my heart to say to someone, "you can't have your homebirth because you are 42+ weeks, but in the long run it is about maintaining your & your baby's safety.

[pampered_mom]

I am studying to be a midwife, and lying to your care provider is never a good solution.

Neither is pressuring a mama to schedule a c/s or do an induction b/c they're "overdue".

OP - if your options are limited and you feel you'll get the best care possible then I'd say that you need to do what's best for you and the baby b/c in the end....you're the only one who will be doing that.

Especially b/c in soooo many cases, CPs bull-headedly feel the need to stick with LMP.

[SeaDoula]

Neither is pressuring a mama to schedule a c/s or do an induction b/c they're "overdue".

OP - if your options are limited and you feel you'll get the best care possible then I'd say that you need to do what's best for you and the baby b/c in the end....you're the only one who will be doing that.

Especially b/c in soooo many cases, CPs bull-headedly feel the need to stick with LMP.

Well, like I said, why would any woman want to stay with a careprovider that would do this. On another note, if she did decide to stay with the care provider, don't we all have the right to say "f*** you this is my body, my baby, and my choice to make"

I really see know reason to lie, why couldn't you use that as an opportunity to either educate (about the fact that not all women ovulate on the same day, etc), or show your CP that they are not making decisions for you.

Also, even if some women go early or late one pregnancy, your next pregnancy could be completely different, so lying to play in favor of a previous situation could put you in a more dangerous situation.

Not all care providers are bad as some make them out to be, they did get into the profession for a reason. If you plan on having this person share the birth of your child, I suggest you be open enough to explain your situation instead of lying.

Assuming is never good.

[leewd]

Yes, I would lie!

I never had a real period between #1 and #2 (nursing), so my "LNP" (really just some spotting) was nearly 2 months before #2 was conceived.

My dues date was based on an ultrasound at 7.5-8 weeks, so I came up with a "LIP" Last Imaginary Period. This served me well, and prevented many unnecessary arguments.

I wouldn't do it just for the heck of it. Afterall, they will also freak out if the baby is "too small." But fudging a few days is no big deal.

--LEE