Weight gain

[Carlito's_wife]

Is anyone having issues with weight gain? I have gained a few already and I have been trying to tell myself it wouldn't matter when I did because I would actually have an excuse to eat and not be obsessed with it. Seems like I'm more obsessed now than ever. I won't even let DH touch me or look at me because I feel so awkward. I have had an eating disorder for the past 12 years.

I tried to read up in a book about what I could try to do and it pretty much told me if I couldn't stop purging to check myself into a hospital so I could be monitored and if I didn't want to do that then I should think about if this is the right time to be pregnant? (Where they implying that I should think about terminating the pregnancy?)

I have already purged a few times since finding out and I really want to stop and not only that feel comfortable gaining the weight for my baby. I don't know what to do though. It seems like I think about it all day.

Anyone going through the same thing or know someone who did and how they handled it while pregnant?

[flapjack]

Not any more. I'm a recovering/recovered bulimic- I still have issues with overeating and using fluff as protection but I can deal with that. With my first pregnancy, I was desperately, desperately ill with hyperemesis gravidas which kind of put things into perspective- my weight dropped below eight stone at 28 weeks and the only reason I wasn't hospitalised is that I had no idea that normal people didn't throw up 30+ times a day. The forced vomiting before I found out is also one of the reasons why it took so long before I did a pregnancy test- 16 weeks, to be precise. That story has a happy ending- I got away with it, had a healthy baby (possibly the largest homebirthed baby in Britain) but the experience of being seriously malnourished and not in control was a major reality check for me.
My guess is that the next few weeks are probably going to be pretty hard for you- there are times during pregnancy where I get so nauseous that I'm tempted to stick my fingers down my throat to see if it feels better. I would strongly suggest that you go and do some deep soul-searching. I know how badly you want this baby. You can change your way of life for him/her, if you want to badly enough.
I'd also go post in mental health and ask for support there :hug It's tough, but you can do it.

[azyre]

I'm struggling here a bit too. I have been dieting sensibly for a long time and have lost 25 kilos. I am really struggling to switch to maintenance mode, and going OTT eating wise. I don't have a problem with purging, I do have a problem with feeling really badly about gaining any weight as yet from over eating. I'm overweight and I don't want to lose the physical advanatge the weightloss has given me thus far, I want to feel fit this pregnancy.

I think I am going to have to go back to calorie counting - eating for maintenance level - and avoiding the scales. Really hard, I haven't got a handle on it yet. I'm hoping to find a midwife who is sensitive to these issues for a big of guidance.

Anyway, I know it is a slightly different problem but want you to know you are not alone in your preoccupation. I wish I had a healthy relationship to food, and I have been working on it, and it is getting better, but not quite there yet.