Pregnant after a miscarriage?

[mesa]

Just wondering if anybody would be interested in starting a mini-tribe for those of us who are pregnant after miscarriage(s).....I know this is the scariest part of pregnancy for most of us.....maybe you would like someone to bounce your fears and worries off of?

I just got my first beta back today.....391. I don't know if that's good or not. I'm 4 weeks, so I guess it's ok...I go back tomorrow for another draw. I've been taking extra folic acid, 81 mg of aspirin, and progesterone cream (my doc refuses to test my progesterone OR give me supplements).

I had 2 losses, one in December on my wedding day, and another one immediately after on March 16th 07.

[ChristyM26]

Well, not a m/c but a stillbirth. Still PAL though, and I think there are others here. Do you post in the PAL forum? I'd be happy to chat though.

[yonit]

I have had 8 miscarriages although none since my baby was born 8 months ago - but 7 in 4 years before that.

I don't really do well with traditional fertility treatment so I won't do any of the early testing, progesterone, etc...

I do give the baby reiki everyday though :) That was actually very helpful in preventing a m/c last time.

[BirthFree]

Oh mesa, that is so sad... to have a loss on your wedding day. :( But really, it's sad for all of you!

I haven't had a loss that has been past 5w, but I worry all the same (no, worry would not be the right word - obsess, fear might be better). I can't imagine if I had losses how I would feel. :( I'm very worried as I don't feel settled like I have before, and I'm worried it's b/c this baby won't stay - but I suppose it's not easier either way.

Wishing you all very sticky babies to the end and healthy wee ones.
~Julie

[LacieD]

I'm here. I've had 2 losses in the past year - one at 12w1d and one at 9w1d. Both times the baby passed around 7 weeks, though. I saw a heartbeat both times too, which makes me all the more anxious because I have to wait longer to feel 'safe'.

I have the least dangerous form of MTHFR as well as LPD, so I'm on a battery of supplements. :lol Prenatal, extra calcium, Folgard, baby aspirin, and Prometrium. My beta at 4w1d was 106.7 and my progesterone was 24, and both numbers are higher than my last (m/c) pregnancy, so I'm hopeful that this will be a sticky baby. :)

I hope all of us bring home healthy babies next year. :)

[Oonah]

I had a blight ovum in '04 about 6 months after my son was born. Even though I've had a successful pregnancy since my m/c, I still have a lot of anxiety about this pregnancy. I was on progesterone support for all of my pregnancies and when I miscarried, I didn't even START bleeding until 12 weeks (3 weeks after I stopped progesterone supps)....the wait was horrible.

This time around I wanted to avoid betas, ultrasounds, progesterone suppositories and all that stuff. This was to be my stress free pregnancy! I wanted to let nature do it's thing and I especially don't want to artificially prolong a pregnancy that isn't viable.

Well...long story short...after a bleed last week I requested a beta....which doubled nicely but my p4 was on the low end of the scale (10) so I am on progesterone supps again....with an u/s scheduled for Thursday.

I am okay with the path we've taken. If I wasn't taking progesterone I'd skip the u/s however since the progesterone could delay a m/c I want to rule out a BO as soon as we can.

I feel like all will be okay....but I am still anxious....very anxious. I know in my head that I am doing everything I can to give this baby what it needs to grow and that that is all I can do. I can't prevent a BO. I know all of this...but it doesn't really bring me peace. It's nearly impossible for me to focus at work and I see that I am blabbering here....sorry.....just trying to release it, relax and enjoy.

Hugs to all :grouphug

[lmonter]

First pregnancy was a miscarriage. Started spotting on our wedding day, continued through our honeymoon. Not exactly the greatest timing. (although we didn't have to worry about birth control that week!)

I'm not doing any blood tests or anything outside of my midwife's normal routine though. If I miscarry, I miscarry and we'll deal with it. I don't have to like it, but we can deal with it.

I'm still anxious until we hear a heartbeat sometime later next month and then when I can feel the baby after that. Then I'll be worried about yet another thing. :lol

[mesa]

I know what you mean about a stress free pregnancy. After my first miscarriage, I was so incredibly shocked...I mean, I had never had anything like that happen to me before, and to be honest, I was a bit naive in thinking that it would NEVER happen....so when we got pregnant again, I thought I would "prevent" it from happening again by going to the doctor early and often (first appointment was at 5 weeks!)...I had several ultrasounds and beta checks, which all indicated everything was fine...then I went to my 10 week check up, and when the doc couldn't pick up the heartbeat by doppler, she took me in for an ultrasound. The possibility of another loss NEVER entered my head that day...even when the US tech left the room and came back in with my doc.

So, this time, when I called my doc and told her I was pregnant again, I was fully expecting to hear that she wanted to see me really soon. Now I know, though, that nothing she can do or say will alleviate my fears. All I can do is relax in the joy of the moment....love that I'm pregnant right now....and try not to worry about tomorrow.

My first appointment is November 27th, and I'm surprisingly ok with that.

How do you do reiki on an unborn baby? That's fascinating! I have high hopes for all of us.

[ChristyM26]

mesa, it's true that they can't do anything but it doesn't make it any less frustrating or stressful.

I get to go in on the 23rd (about 8 weeks, we think) to get an u/s for dating, so I'll at least know when this one should be due and should see the hb which makes me happy. Unforunately, it won't do anything to relieve my stress because I lost my twins at 20w, 3d when I went into preterm labor. So even making it out of the 1st trimester is no indication that I'll be safe and I'm a ball of stress. On the plus side, we know that there are, in fact, many things that we could do and the only tricky part is finding out what will work best. I'm feel lucky that my OB group has been incredibly supportive and everybody I've talked to has asked me how I'm doing and if they can do anything to help (obviously, from a medical perspective, but still). I think I have the best doctors in the world (so much so that I drive about an hour to get to their offices).

[cody'smomma]

I had an mc three months before I got pg with my son. So this time I am def. holding my breath and trying not to get too into this. But I think it may be too late!! I'm already obsessing and reading every pg book I can get my hands on. PLus the timing for this one would be ideal. I don't really want to wait any longer. But I know that this is not in my hands. Everytime I go to the bathroom, I am nervous about what I might see!

[larastheme]

I had an mc three months before I got pg with my son. So this time I am def. holding my breath and trying not to get too into this. But I think it may be too late!! I'm already obsessing and reading every pg book I can get my hands on. PLus the timing for this one would be ideal. I don't really want to wait any longer. But I know that this is not in my hands. Everytime I go to the bathroom, I am nervous about what I might see!

I'm in the same boat. Every time I wipe, I inspect :o

I'm trying to be optimistic about this one (after all there's no reason this pregnancy should end in m/c too, I think) but it's hard. I waver over when to call the midwife, and then I tell myself that I probably couldn't do anything to stop another m/c anyway. (BTW, didn't do any testing after m/c--first one after two uneventful pregnancies). Soooo, probably won't go till I'm about 12 weeks, then I'd better hear a heartbeat! (Hey, how early can you see a heartbeat on u/s?)

[mesa]

I'd say about 7 or 8 weeks is a good time to see the hb on ultrasound.

[larastheme]

I'd say about 7 or 8 weeks is a good time to see the hb on ultrasound.

Mmmm, maybe I'll make that appointment earlier then. Thanks!

[ChristyM26]

Yeah, the heart begins beating at the end of week 5, beginning of week 6, so by week 7/8 you can definitely see a strong hb.

[yonit]

Yes, you should be able to see the h/b on ultrasound by 7/8 weeks no problem.

But here are some reasons you may not want to:

Seeing the hb does nothing to reduce your chance of m/c. It is still very common to have a m/c afterwards. Hearing the hb on doppler (generally around 12 weeks) is a much better indication that you are in a safer territory.

Seeing the hb makes the pregnancy MUCH more real. This can be great, but can also make a loss afterwards that much harder. There is absolutely nothing more real than seeing your baby's hb - and then seeing it stopped a week later.

Just to share my experience - with my second m/c I started spotting at about 8 weeks. I had never spotting in pregnancy before, so while I knew it could be normal, it wasn't normal *for me*. Called my mw and agreed to an u/s so that we could see how babe was doing. Baby had a good strong h/b and everyone was very reassuring that all was well and I had nothing to worry about. 10 days later I had horrible cramps and bleeding. Decided to go to the ER -still not sure why. They did another u/s, where this time it was very clear that there was no h/b and the baby had died.

This was so amazingly traumatic you wouldn't believe it - or maybe you would. I swore i would never have a first trimester u/s again. And I never have.

Obviously, you should do whatever you think is best, but just wanted to make you aware of the other side of the coin.

[dkenagy]

I've just experienced my first loss after 3 beautiful, uneventful pregnancies. I was about 7 weeks. I found out I was pg again just about 5 weeks after the m/c, so I called my OB and agreed to have an u/s to date the pgncy. I think part of me wanted to go in there and see an 11-week fetus and prove that the previous month had been a huge, horrible mistake. Instead, we saw an empty gestational sac measuring right around 4 weeks. I had betas drawn at my behest during the next week. At 20 dpo my beta was 8038 and at 22 dpo my beta was 14688. Those numbers are very high and now I am schedule for another u/s on Monday to see how many babies are in there. Multiples could be very hard on me since I didn't have any time to recuperate physically or emotionally after the m/c.

Coincidentally, I'd never had a beta drawn or an u/s before 20 weeks before this pgncy. The loss changed me, though, and now I feel like I need that extra reassurance--an extra u/s or two (for the prgncy, I don't intend to have an u/s at every visit!), beta hCG levels--those are the things I need at this point in my life.

Although I hate that any of us has had to go through the terrible hurt of a loss, I'm glad there are other PALs here. It's so different being pregnant AFTER.

[Faithsmommy]

I am pregnant after a miscarriage. My first pregnancy ended in miscarriage after I saw the heartbeat on u/s at 8 weeks. I found out at 13 weeks I had a missed miscarriage and the baby measured 9 weeks. I have been pretty paranoid so far. I am constantly comparing my symptoms to my last pregnancy, wondering if everything is okay. I will have my first ultrasound at 9 weeks. I dont really know if it will even make me feel any better since I lost the last one after I saw that everything was fine. I'm also scared to death that I will go in for the u/s and there will be no heartbeat. Oh well, I guess whatever is meant to happen will...but I am glad to know that I am not alone in feeling this way. :)

[Parker'smommy]

Hello ladies. I'm fine with a thread here but I am also active on the PAL thread in Pregnancy and Loss board. Anyone is welcome there also. It's kind of nice to talk to moms who are doing it ahead of you and they give you confidence to make it through it all. I love my PAL moms....

I'm Heather, and finding myself pregnant for the third time this year. It doesn't seem possible. I had a 20 week stillborn loss in Feb. ( after 2 uneventful pregnancies) and was single handedly the most gut wrenching experience of my life and has change who *I* am to the very core of my being. I am a different person because of my experience. I then went to lose a 3-5 week baby in May. It really put me into a tailspin..." what the heck was going on?" and now, I'm 11 weeks pregnant. I try and stay positive most days, but sometimes it's a real effort to do so. I feel like my innocence has been stripped from me, and it's just so unfair. This pregnancy is so different than any of the others....I'm just paranoid. Things I took for granted before now are so important like checking the TP every.single.time I go to the bathroom. I can NOT not look. It's obsessive.

HUGS to everyone...it's a rough journey!

EDITED TO SAY- OMG...I just posted this and I get out and realize I'm in JUNE 2008...not May 2008....and realize that it's because I was in the June 2007 ddc with my baby that I lost in Feb....ugh. Anyways, I meant all of it and really, all of you are welcome to come to the PAL thread!!! GOOD LUCK TO ALL OF YOU!!!

[larastheme]

Obviously, you should do whatever you think is best, but just wanted to make you aware of the other side of the coin.


Wow, that's certainly something to think about. And I'm so very very sorry that you had to go through that; in fact, I'm sorry that any of us had to go through what we did.

We all need a very big :grouphug

[happyhippiemama]

I'll join. I had a m/c in 03/02 at 12 wks along. It was a missed miscarriage, so her gestational age was actually about 8 weeks.

My DD was born with a birth defect, a month early, in 08/03.

I m/c again in Feb of this year at about 8 weeks, again.


I'm nervous as hell.

[mamatosaskia]

Hi,

I just tested positive and I am freaked out! I have one dd who is almost 3.5 and I have had two miscarriages so far this year. This pregnancy does feel different than the previous two. I am super tired and my boobs REALLY hurt! With both pregnancies that ended in a m/c I knew, based on my cycle, that I would get pregnant, but they didn't feel right. I called my midwife right away and asked if I could get my betas drawn along with progesterone, just to see if things look 'normal'. I can't wait until this baby is here!

With dd I had spotting throughout my pregnancy and had a partial placental abruption at 33 weeks. After hospitalization and bedrest, she was born with Group B Strep infection and spent two weeks in the NICU. Needless to say, I just want a healthy, happy, pregnancy this time around!

I am sending out positive vibes to all of you who have experienced a loss. It is so hard!!! But, how great to know we can share our fears/concerns with people who have been there.

Take care,

Jacqueline

[mesa]

so, I got my beta results back...391 at 4w3d, nearly 700 at 4w5d.....I got my NP to agree to prescribe prometrium, even though she didn't test my progesterone levels. My first ultrasound is on Halloween. it's kind of weird, I more nervous now than I was before. My stomach was in knots most of yesterday.

My levels from my molar pregnancy were sooo high compared with this one. 5w2d, they were 1760, 6w2d they were 19631. Molar pregnancies are characterized by abnormally high hCG for dates, which neither I nor my doc noticed. My levels this week actually seemed low in comparison, :lol but I understand that every pregnancy is different....right down to levels.

I hope soon I can relax and just enjoy this pregnancy.

hugs to all of you!! I have high hopes for us all!!

[queensgirl]

I'll join too. I had a mc a year to the date before my last pregnancy with DD. It was a blighted ovum and I was truly devestated. It scared me every day of my last pregnancy. I know that fear is so unhealthy so in this pregnancy I am working on positive visualization exercises and just being pregnant. For me that means wearing my designer very fab maternity jeans.

[mesa]

I've been drooling over that new belly style at mimi maternity...the 7 For All Mankind jeans. My goodness, mimi is expensive, though....I've been wanting a cashmere sweater for ages, and DH asked me if I wanted that cashmere maternity one they had....I told him, if he was going to spend a hundred or more on one sweater, it better be non maternity, because I want to have it for the rest of my life :lol

I might, just might, splurge on some 7 For All Mankind though.

[starlightsound]

I'll join in. I had a full term loss in April and am now about 6 weeks along. I've been in lurk mode in the PAL threads... not quite ready to move out of the TTC thread, not quite willing to commit to posting in the PAL thread... I'll feel better once I find a new doc/practice and get through the first trimester. Although I already know I won't rest easy until this babe makes it out into the world alive and okay. This is going to be a long, long winter.

[LacieD]

Well, my second beta yesterday was 501, up from 106 on Monday. Looking good so far! :D

[Oonah]

Fear does suck!!!

I accepted my m/c but I hate that it forever changed my first trimester experience.

[sunflwrmoonbeam]

hi! This is my 4th pregnancy in a year, so I know all about early miscarriage. Needless to say, I'm scared. My HPTs have been faint (I'm only 14DPO, my period isn't even late yet), and I have my first beta this morning. I"m nervous, as I've never had a positive beta in my life.

Hope I get to stick around.

[mesa]

starlight, welcome! I'm so, so sorry to hear about your loss. :hug

Lacie, are you going to keep getting your betas checked? I kind of want to, but I'm not sure. Besides, I bruise so badly with every stick...people actually thought I was an IV drug user the last time I donated blood. They blew a vein in each arm, and it took 3 people to get the blood going. I have baby veins...:lol

sunflower...wow. I'm sending you all the sticky baby dust I can find. After my second, I thought I was going to die. Shortly after that, I told my husband that I wanted to get my tubes tied, because nothing was worth that pain.

But you, my dear, are my hero. I'm praying hard for you.

[LacieD]

I know I'll for sure have my beta/progesterone checked at my next appt. (Thursday) but after that, I'm not sure. I have weekly appts. with my RE for the first tri, and I believe I'll have weekly or semi-weekly u/s once I get to 6 weeks. :)

[ChristyM26]

Lacie, I'm glad to know I'm not the only one who'll have u/s appts constantly. I was beginning to feel like a wierdo.

sunflwr, much love and sticky baby vibes for you!

And I have to say, that my maternity jeans come from Old Navy and I adore them. They are as close to perfect as I can get. They're not to long and they're not some strange shape. The only down side is the belly panel is big and at the moment, I don't fit in my normal clothes but these are a bit to big. I'm making due though. :wink

[imbarefoot]

Pregnant after miscarriage here. My m/c was in July. I'm very happy to be pregnant this time around and I really hope it sticks.

After going through the m/c at home in my bathtub, it really liberated me! It was very painful and surreal. It makes me confident for this birth, my UC.

Do I have worries? Yes, from time to time. I try not to give them power and I try to think positively. I think this baby is doing great and I think I will give birth to a healthy child in June. Sometimes I worry when a symptom goes away. For instance, I had bloody gums that all of a sudden stopped this morning. But I still have other symptoms.

Either way, I don't need an ultrasound to confirm anything. If I lose the baby, I'll lose the baby. If the baby is doing great, then I'll know that as the pregnancy progresses.

I'm just so thankful to have concieved again after that m/c. :love

[suzysprite]

I've had two miscarriages. The first one was years ago, and very early. The second one was last November at 11 weeks (the fetus was only measuring at 6 weeks, and they never found a heartbeat). I told myself I wasn't going to get too excited about this pregnancy until I at least heard the heartbeat. I don't have a midwife's appointment until Nov. 19th, though, and I'm already busting at the seams with excitement. This is bad.

I really do feel more pregnant this time around. My breasts ache worse than they have since puberty, my brain is constantly shutting down for no real reason, and I am so, so tired.

Sending good thoughts to all of you for healthy, full-term babies!

[Nimbus]

I'll join, too. I'm not quite ready to commit to the full DDC, but a PAL for June 2008 group feels welcoming! Glad to have this as an options - thanks for starting it.

I had bleeding 8-12 weeks when preg w/ ds and went on to have a 'normal' pregnancy and birth. Had a missed m/c and d&c at 9 weeks at the beginning of July '07. Now I'm 5 weeks, have known for about a week, and am finally letting myself believe it. I had a beta hcg of 1386 and progesterone at 38 at 17 dpo.

Although I know the u/s doesn't really provide any security, I'm still looking forward to it. The baby I lost stopped growing at 7w5d, so I'm looking at that as the 'safe' marker, but I know it doesn't really mean anything. I'm going to try really hard to just enjoy the pregnancy and not freak out too much, but I'm switching back and forth between the two approaches.

[Cardinal]

Hi everyone! I am tentatively, quietly and cautiously joining in...

I had a miscarriage last summer and a molar pregnancy in the winter. That was awful!

I am about 5 wks along and probably due around June 18! The ultrasound showed so far that the baby is neither ectopic nor molar, but we're not sure about anything else since it is not far along enough yet.

I am very excited though anxious and trying to not really let myself get too happy.

-Carolyn

[mesa]

Hi Carolyn! I had a partial molar in March. You are the first person I have met on MDC that has had one too. Welcome! My sono is next Wednesday, so hopefully we'll see a heartbeat.

[mesa]

I'll join, too. I'm not quite ready to commit to the full DDC, but a PAL for June 2008 group feels welcoming! Glad to have this as an options - thanks for starting it.

I had bleeding 8-12 weeks when preg w/ ds and went on to have a 'normal' pregnancy and birth. Had a missed m/c and d&c at 9 weeks at the beginning of July '07. Now I'm 5 weeks, have known for about a week, and am finally letting myself believe it. I had a beta hcg of 1386 and progesterone at 38 at 17 dpo.

Although I know the u/s doesn't really provide any security, I'm still looking forward to it. The baby I lost stopped growing at 7w5d, so I'm looking at that as the 'safe' marker, but I know it doesn't really mean anything. I'm going to try really hard to just enjoy the pregnancy and not freak out too much, but I'm switching back and forth between the two approaches.


I know what you mean. I spent a good hour yesterday reviewing my notes from both of my miscarriages....trying to calculate exactly when the pregnancies ended....and trying to make a note of those same milestones on my calendar....then I realized, why am I putting this negative energy into this pregnancy? I just need to chill, really. But it's so, so hard. For instance, after my first miscarriage, I went to the OB super early when I got pregnant again...had two early ultrasounds (too early for heartbeat, though) and 4 beta draws, all that pointed to a healthy pregnancy.

It didn't make one whit of difference. So I'm trying to ease myself into a state of mind that allows me to relax. But man, it's hard.

I had a dream night before last that I gave birth to boy/girl twins, in my bathtub here at home. Here's the funny kicker, though...I had two midwives, a doula, and an anesthesiologist.....because I had an EPIDURAL. Nuts.

Then last night, I dreamed I had a boy, with white blond hair. I named him Caleb. These dreams are so, so vivid. I'm glad I'm putting it all on here, so I can have a record for after the baby's born. (How's that for optimism? :) ) I didn't keep good records with my boys...and I really wish I had.

[Cardinal]

Hi Carolyn! I had a partial molar in March. You are the first person I have met on MDC that has had one too. Welcome! My sono is next Wednesday, so hopefully we'll see a heartbeat.

They think mine was a PMP too. That was a nightmare. I had a D&E that nearly killed me (lost a LOT of blood) and a tough recovery emotionally and physically. Hated the monthly blood draws too. Yeah, it's tough also in that so many people don't know what a molar pregnancy is, and therefore you get to talk about it A LOT. Good luck next wednesday. Keep me posted.

[mamatosaskia]

Hi,

Just curious how many of you are getting early ultrasounds at your first prenantal? I have mine in two weeks and I am thinking of getting one. I had a partial placental abruption with dd, so I think technically I am going to be monitored more closely anyway.

I have had two dreams so far this pregnancy that I lost the baby. I still have all of my pregnancy symptoms and morning sickness has started, but the dreams have left me very sad and scared!

Anyway...

Jacqueline

[berkeleyp]

This is my second pregnancy after a stillbirth. My living daughter is 2.5. I thought that I would be better this time around now that i've had a living baby but i am feeling more concerned about miscarriage than I did before. I hope its not a bad but true premonition. I'm trying to stay positive and not live in the shadow of my loss through another pregnancy but its tough.

[Nimbus]

Anyone else having cramps? I know it can be normal but it's also a sign of miscarriage, so I'm worrying over every twinge (and more period-like cramps, too.)

I'll be getting an ultrasound as soon as possible (I'm only 6 weeks), even though I know it doesn't provide a safeguard against miscarriage. I just really want to hear the heartbeat. I didn't get to last time. I think we missed it by just two days or so.

[suzysprite]

Ditto Nimbus. I have my first appointment on the 19th, and I'm not leaving wihtout an ultrasound. :lol I hear its risky to get too many, but I won't feel secure until i hear the heartbeat, since I never heard it with my last one.

[happyhippiemama]

Ditto Nimbus and suzysprite. I didn't get to hear the hb with either of my m/c, and there's no way I'm leaving this appt without hearing it.

Although I need to go make the appt soon, huh. :lol

[beansavi]

Just wanted to chime in and say that with my dd in this situation, my midwife had me try and focus on the present, and to think about one day at a time. She told me to light a little candle on an alter at the end of each day and say thank you to God and the child for today.

Everything was fine.

My midwife also gave me some good grounding advice about pregnancy: she said, "You plant a row of seeds, and most of them come up". That let me know my body was perfectly normal, regardless.

I had 2 more kids after my miscarriage, and I worried a bit with both of them. But it all was okay.

Blessings to you all! :)

[mesa]

Hey, I don't think I told everyone about my ultrasound last week. We measured right on at 6w4d, and heard a heartbeat of 120 bpm!! I didn't make it this far with my last two miscarriages, either, so I feel so much better.

Oh, and after reading the thread slamming the DDCs on IP, I feel the need to say to anyone who may be lurking and judging our need/desire to have early ultrasounds....anything that reduces my stress level in these early weeks is a GOOD thing. Also, I suffered from a molar pregnancy with my last miscarriage, and that particular condition requires early and constant monitoring....google it if you don't know what it is. :wave

[Oonah]

"You plant a row of seeds, and most of them come up

I LOVE IT!!!!!

[Oonah]

Hey, I don't think I told everyone about my ultrasound last week. We measured right on at 6w4d, and heard a heartbeat of 120 bpm!! I didn't make it this far with my last two miscarriages, either, so I feel so much better.



yeah!!! I bet you're so relieved!!!

[BlueMoonBean]

Hey, I don't think I told everyone about my ultrasound last week. We measured right on at 6w4d, and heard a heartbeat of 120 bpm!! I didn't make it this far with my last two miscarriages, either, so I feel so much better.

Oh, and after reading the thread slamming the DDCs on IP, I feel the need to say to anyone who may be lurking and judging our need/desire to have early ultrasounds....anything that reduces my stress level in these early weeks is a GOOD thing. Also, I suffered from a molar pregnancy with my last miscarriage, and that particular condition requires early and constant monitoring....google it if you don't know what it is. :wave

Yea for your bean's heartbeat!! :) :)

I saw that thread, too... it just made me glad that our DDC is so warm and welcoming. We will be having an anatomical scan at 20 weeks... Audrey had some congenital heart defects and we want to know if this bean has any problems that might need immediate care. I consider my choices for my children very carefully in light of the needs of my family and my sanity. One of the things that I love about MDC is the gentle supportiveness for all the choices made by all of the mamas here. Oh, yeah, and the lack of the sheep mentality... I think most MDC mamas assume that whatever choice you make, you've "made" it, ie - you were informed about the choice and made the right choice for you! To me, that's more important than reflexively making the "natural" choice (which would be just another version of being a sheep). :)

I had two miscarriages... one extremely dangerous and full of interventions, the other less so. Both were early and highly traumatic. I hold my breath for the first trimester, and to a lesser extent for the entire pregnancy. I am trying as hard as I can to find a peace in the process and to have faith in my body. I have a tendency to view pregnancy as a risky stage before I can protect my child with my actions... I'm trying to reach a point where I can view pregnancy as the time when I can also protect my child with my actions and my choices, even if it's only through trying not to be stressed or full of fear... if that makes any sense??

This time is even harder... I have a tiny little worry that b/c this baby was a surprise, somehow I might not deserve to have an easy pregnancy and healthy baby... b/c we weren't as open to having a baby now, so we don't deserve one.... I don't know, just a guilt complex, I suppose. :(

Ugh, sorry for crying on your virtual shoulders... b/c my m/c were so long ago, I sometimes discount how present they are in my psyche.

Thanks for being here, mamas...

[ChristyM26]

I am having an incredibly hard time with life. My twins should have been born in 2 weeks and although in some ways having this baby is helping (that inate fear that I would never have a living child is gone, for the time being) I am having a terrible time with people who are having babies now. My babies should have grown for another 20 weeks and instead I'm looking at another 7 months of waiting. I'm sorry - I'm being an incredible down note but I don't really know where else to turn to, KWIM? Has anybody gone through this? :gloomy:

[mesa]

Oh, Christy, :hug I know it's not the same, but my friend's SIL was due right around the same time I was when I had my first miscarriage. I miscarried before she even found out the gender...and she made it perfectly clear that the only reason she was pregnant again (after 2 girls) was because she wanted a boy...and if she had another girl she was going to have a really hard time loving the baby. I never did find out what she ended up having, as my friend and I had a huge fight right around the time of my second miscarriage and we haven't spoken since.

So, I think I kind of have an idea what you're talking about....I had subscribed to those "your pregnancy this week" email newsletters, and it really sucked opening my email box every week to see "This week your baby is practicing breathing movements and sucking his thumb" and stuff like that. My EDDs were really hard too.

[starlightsound]

Anyone else having cramps? I know it can be normal but it's also a sign of miscarriage, so I'm worrying over every twinge (and more period-like cramps, too.)

I'll be getting an ultrasound as soon as possible (I'm only 6 weeks), even though I know it doesn't provide a safeguard against miscarriage. I just really want to hear the heartbeat. I didn't get to last time. I think we missed it by just two days or so.

I've been feeling crampy up until this weekend. I'm just about 8 weeks. They were more like period-cramps, now that you mention it! I tried really hard to just work with them and not worry too much. Sigh. But in truth, all I wanted to do was lay down and wish them away. We go in for our first prenatal exam tomorrow. We were supposed to go in last week, but had to reschedule because of a birth.

ChristyM26: My son was born at full term: 40w5d. There is not a day that goes by that I'm not at least a little bit angry about losing him. It's just not fair that we're here WAITING for a baby, sometimes twice or three times as long. What are we, elephants?! I never thought I'd have such a long "gestation" for a child. I'm with you. Grump.

[ChristyM26]

Thank you! It helps just to know that I'm not alone.

For those of you waiting for an u/s, I hope you get to hear that wonderful sound.

[Cardinal]

Hey, I don't think I told everyone about my ultrasound last week. We measured right on at 6w4d, and heard a heartbeat of 120 bpm!! I didn't make it this far with my last two miscarriages, either, so I feel so much better.

Oh, and after reading the thread slamming the DDCs on IP, I feel the need to say to anyone who may be lurking and judging our need/desire to have early ultrasounds....anything that reduces my stress level in these early weeks is a GOOD thing. Also, I suffered from a molar pregnancy with my last miscarriage, and that particular condition requires early and constant monitoring....google it if you don't know what it is. :wave


YES YES YES ABOUT THE MOLAR! I am all for natural birth and natural EVERYTHING but an ultrasound was what allowed me to know that I had a molar pregnancy and going to the doc today and having an ultrasound proved this is a healthy, viable pregnancy. A molar pregnancy can kill you. I am all about the natural way of birth but I'll never go without an u/s early in pregnancy. It can reveal soooo much and help determine appropriate courses of action.

[Cardinal]

I've been feeling crampy up until this weekend. I'm just about 8 weeks. They were more like period-cramps, now that you mention it! I tried really hard to just work with them and not worry too much. Sigh. But in truth, all I wanted to do was lay down and wish them away. We go in for our first prenatal exam tomorrow. We were supposed to go in last week, but had to reschedule because of a birth.

ChristyM26: My son was born at full term: 40w5d. There is not a day that goes by that I'm not at least a little bit angry about losing him. It's just not fair that we're here WAITING for a baby, sometimes twice or three times as long. What are we, elephants?! I never thought I'd have such a long "gestation" for a child. I'm with you. Grump.

I am so sorry about your son. :( I can't imagine your pain and I just wanted to wish you wonderful vibes with your new babe. I hope this goes well and smooth and quick for you.

[starlightsound]

Thank you, Cardinal!
We had out first appt with our OB today...

They did a urine test to confirm pg, but it came out really faint. The Dr came in, told us the results weren't as "positive" as he'd like, but said not to worry, we'd just take a look. He immediately took us back for a quick ultrasound, and there was a perfect little bean with a nice yolk sac. We measured perfectly to the day, and the HB was over 150!

Jeez, I can't even tell you how terrifying those couple of minutes between "test results" and "picture" were. I thought I was not going to be able to walk into the room. He'll be doing a blood draw as well.

I'm so relieved.
Christy: how are the cramps? Mine have kind of come back a little.

[Nimbus]

Mesa, starlightsound, and Cardinal -- congrats on positive ultrasounds!

I totally agree that, if having a u/s will help reduce your stress level, it's worth it. I have to wait until the 28th of this month for mine, but I'm feeling okay about it. I'm still having a little cramping, but I don't have the odd sense that something is wrong. I did last time -- it was like I just knew things weren't going right. I can't explain it. Did anyone else experience that?

BlueMoonBean -- we're all here to support one another. I, too, am so glad to have this resource (MDC) and outlet for questioning, venting and sometimes just shooting the breeze. There's a great sense of community here.

Happy u/s's to all who are waiting!

[LacieD]

This is turning out to be a really difficult week. The anniversary of my first m/c is coming up this Sunday, and two of my friends on another board just found out within the past few days that they've m/c - both of them were around 12 weeks, just like I was. So all of it combined has brought back a flood of memories and it sucks.

I have an appointment tomorrow morning, and while I'm not scheduled for an u/s this week, I'm going to try and see if they'll squeeze me in for a quick peek, just to set my mind at ease.

[lmonter]

I'm still having a little cramping, but I don't have the odd sense that something is wrong. I did last time -- it was like I just knew things weren't going right. I can't explain it. Did anyone else experience that?
Yes. My first pregnancy was a missed miscarriage, and I just had this forboding feeling during our honeymoon (I started spotting on our wedding day, D&C a week after we got back from our honeymoon). I hadn't had a chance to fine-tune my mommy instincts yet, so I wasn't sure about anything and all that. Now I know to trust those instincts. :)

[Cardinal]

Yes. My first pregnancy was a missed miscarriage, and I just had this forboding feeling during our honeymoon (I started spotting on our wedding day, D&C a week after we got back from our honeymoon). I hadn't had a chance to fine-tune my mommy instincts yet, so I wasn't sure about anything and all that. Now I know to trust those instincts. :)

Forgive me for my ignorance but what is a missed miscarriage? Would you mind sharing your experience? If you don't wish to, I understand. I used to hate when people asked what a molar pregnancy is...

[lmonter]

Forgive me for my ignorance but what is a missed miscarriage? Would you mind sharing your experience? If you don't wish to, I understand. I used to hate when people asked what a molar pregnancy is...
No worries, I've got no problem talking about my miscarriage - it totally helped/helps my healing process to share. :)

A missed miscarriage is a miscarriage that happens and the baby dies, but your body doesn't expel it and basically thinks you're still pregnant. At least that's how it was explained to me. I.e. my baby died around my birthday in early May at 8 weeks along, I started spotting on our wedding day (May 25), continued brown/pink tinged spotting for the following week on our honeymoon (just barely enough to use a pantiliner a day and to see it on toilet paper), had an ultrasound on June 4th to discover the baby hadn't developed beyond 8 weeks (I should've been 12 or 13 weeks by then - so a definite difference), and a D&C on June 12th because my body wasn't doing anything but spot on and off - no cramping, no more bleeding besides spotting, etc. And just knowing I had a dead baby in me, for over a month, kinda wigged me out. I just wanted the whole ordeal to be done and go away, you know?

[BlueMoonBean]

Forgive me for my ignorance but what is a missed miscarriage? Would you mind sharing your experience? If you don't wish to, I understand. I used to hate when people asked what a molar pregnancy is...

It's where your pregnancy ends, but your body doesn't notice right away. I had a pregnancy end at around 6 weeks, and I didn't start to bleed for almost another 4 weeks... and when I did, I almost immediately started to hemorrhage. Badly. I was in a hospital for about three days after my d&c. That's actually how I found out that I have a didelphic uterus. And when the MDs told me I would never carry a child to term. :nana: to them!

[kltroy]

I am having an incredibly hard time with life. My twins should have been born in 2 weeks and although in some ways having this baby is helping (that inate fear that I would never have a living child is gone, for the time being) I am having a terrible time with people who are having babies now. My babies should have grown for another 20 weeks and instead I'm looking at another 7 months of waiting. I'm sorry - I'm being an incredible down note but I don't really know where else to turn to, KWIM? Has anybody gone through this? :gloomy:

So sorry you have to go through this. While I haven't personally lost a pregnancy, I do have two twin sisters who were born at 21 weeks (to my mom, obviously). I can't even imagine how difficult that must have been for her - they lived for a little under 1 day each and it was her first pregnancy. My dad still gives her flowers on their birthday. Best wishes for a healthy happy pregnancy this time around.

[starlightsound]

LacieD: How was your appointment today?

[LacieD]

It was great! Well, the appointment itself was nothing much (I have to wait until next week for my u/s) but my progesterone went from 13 last week to 27.5 this week! Yay for PIO shots! :D

[happyhippiemama]

My first appt with my CNM isn't scheduled until Dec 7, which'll put me around 12 weeks. So I raised holy hell about not knowing my dates and my previous missed miscarriage at 12 wks and the rest of my history, even started crying on the phone.

Wellll....

I got an appt for u/s on THIS MONDAY!! You know I'll be posting here before and after. I'm keeping my fingers crossed for a hb, or at least measuring not so small that it's unlikely there's viability.

[Gr8ful Momma]

I go for my appt on Wed morning. I have had very little symptoms with this pg and it is freaking me out. Even with my missed m/c I had horrible morning sickness until I didn't. I have had 3 boys and was horribly sick with both pg. I keep telling myself that I am so symptom free because it is a girl.

[Nimbus]

Lacie -- hooray for your good hormone levels.

HappyHippieMama -- good for you for demanding the service and attention you deserve from your midwife's office. I'll keep my fingers crossed for your appointment.

[happyhippiemama]

I just had my ultrasound today. We're doing fine, so far.

Heartbeat = 176, measuring at 8w2d, puts my EDD at 6/21. Keeping my fingers crossed. My prior 2 m/c we didn't get a hb.

But now I'm all paranoid about having had a t/v u/s. If I start spotting from this I'm gonna freak out all over again. :o

[ChristyM26]

happyhippiemama, :hug. I never spotted from mine - I think the skill of the tech plays a part in that. And that hb is almost the same as what we got at 8w5d (ours was 171). Good news!

[starlightsound]

Just keep in mind Happyippiemama that the risk of miscarriage gets significantly smaller if you do get a heartbeat... I'm not positive, but I think I read it drops to 5%. So, yay for 176!!!

[ChristyL]

Hey everyone, I'm pretty new to Mothering. I had a miscarriage with my first pregnancy back in May... it's hard to believe that I would be so close to having a baby at this point. I'm just glad to be pregnant and here!

[BlueMoonBean]

Hey everyone, I'm pretty new to Mothering. I had a miscarriage with my first pregnancy back in May... it's hard to believe that I would be so close to having a baby at this point. I'm just glad to be pregnant and here!

:wave Welcome to MDC! When are you due-ish? :)

[BlueMoonBean]

So, I go in for an u/s on wed. morning. I *know* that all this morning sickness is probably a good sign, but I'm managing to worry about the worst case scenarios related to high hCG. Ugh.

Plus, I'm still spotting lightly. I just really need to see a heartbeat.....

[LacieD]

Hey Christy - are you on BOLU as well? Either way, welcome to our group. :)

Well, I made it past the one year mark, hopefully still with a healthy baby. I can't wait for my u/s on Thursday!

[Cardinal]

It's where your pregnancy ends, but your body doesn't notice right away. I had a pregnancy end at around 6 weeks, and I didn't start to bleed for almost another 4 weeks... and when I did, I almost immediately started to hemorrhage. Badly. I was in a hospital for about three days after my d&c. That's actually how I found out that I have a didelphic uterus. And when the MDs told me I would never carry a child to term. :nana: to them!

My pregnancy symptoms have totally stopped and I am really scared. Did your symptoms stop suddenly?

[happyhippiemama]

In my missed miscarriage (around 7 wks), my symptoms didn't stop AT ALL. My belly grew and everything. I had no idea I had lost the baby until I began spotting at 12 weeks, 2 days before my first appt.

[BlueMoonBean]

No. They never really started. It was my very first pregnancy, so I was just waiting around for them to show up. I did spot a bit, for about half an hour on one day early on, but not nearly enough to make you automatically think MC, KWIM? It was heavier than I would ignore now, but then I thought it was just normal implantation bleeding.

The rest of the story gets a bit hairy and, I don't want to be *that* mama... you know, the annoying one on the playground with all the horror stories. In a nutshell, I started to hurt REALLY badly and then to bleed profusely. There was no mistaking it. :gloomy:

I think you are just seeing the light on the other end of the tunnel. In my subsequent and successful pregnancies, I've always spotted a bit (later than implantation bleeding should be) and my symptoms almost always disappear almost overnight. And everything was always fine! :)

:hug Mama! Please don't hesitate to talk to your care provider about getting some reassurance. Take care of yourself, and maybe try talking to the babe. Find a nice calm nook and a cup of good tea. Relax and breathe. It can be so scary and really hard to focus on the miracle of the process. You are in my thoughts (and prayers if you desire them). Try to find a way to be at peace for now. :hug again....

PM me if you have any more questions or just need to talk, OK? :)

[Gr8ful Momma]

Welcome Christy, I am sorry about you m/c but happy about your pg.


I went in for my first u/s this morning...my dates are right on and the heartrate was nice and strong. They only saw one in there this time.....boy was my DH relieved. :lol

[BlueMoonBean]

We saw a healthy heartrate and a single baby!! :jumpers:

Had some issues with dating, but I think everything is fine. :)

[happyhippiemama]

Welcome Christy, I am sorry about you m/c but happy about your pg.


I went in for my first u/s this morning...my dates are right on and the heartrate was nice and strong. They only saw one in there this time.....boy was my DH relieved. :lol

We saw a healthy heartrate and a single baby!! :jumpers:

Had some issues with dating, but I think everything is fine. :)



:thumb:love:bouncy:clap:bgbounce to Gr8tful Momma and BlueMoonBeam!! Congrats on your heartbeats!! :heartbeat

[starlightsound]

Yay for heartbeats! Welcome to the group, ChristyL!

[LacieD]

I've got another u/s at 10:15am tomorrow - wish me luck and heartbeat/healthy baby vibes!

[Nimbus]

Hooray for the recent good u/ses -- Gr8ful Momma, BueMoonBeam, happyhippiemama.

Weclome ChristyL!

LacieD -- sending good vibes your way for your u/s tomorrow.

Cardinal -- my pregnancy symptoms didn't go away until about a week after I had my d&c. That was about two weeks after my baby stopped growing. Sending you :hug :hug

Having lots and lots of m/s here. I have to keep reminding myself that's a good sign! :p

[Gr8ful Momma]

Cardinal, just reading the whole thread and wanted to send some more :hug your way.

Just a question, on the days I don't remember to take my pre-natal vitamins, I have absolutely no m/s but on the days I take it I am so freakin' sick. Is this happening to anyone else? I've tried on both full/empty stomach and it is always the same result.

[suzysprite]

Gr*tful momma, I've had that experience, as well. Or at least, MS is much more manageable on the days when i forget to take my vitamin (which is most days :duck:)

SO happy to see people getting heartbeats- what a positive sign! I meet with my midwife for the first time on Monday, and I'm extremely nervous. I haven't met her at all before, and i hope she isn't very medical minded, but on the other hand, I'm going to be very upset if she doesn't check for a heartbeat at this first appointment.

Cardinal, I really hope all is well with you.

[happyhippiemama]

Cardinal, just reading the whole thread and wanted to send some more :hug your way.

Just a question, on the days I don't remember to take my pre-natal vitamins, I have absolutely no m/s but on the days I take it I am so freakin' sick. Is this happening to anyone else? I've tried on both full/empty stomach and it is always the same result.

I've had that happen to.... and have horrible constipation to boot (even when NOT pg I only have a movement once or twice a week, so you can imagine with all the extra iron...)

So I think I'm gonna get some kids gummy vitamin bears and some folic acid tabs and take those instead. it's gotta be better than not taking anything regularly, which is what I'm doing now...

[ChristyM26]

Lacie, I hope the appt went well and all is good.

Cardinal, any news?

Gr8ful Momma, I've not had a problem with my prenatals, thankfully, but I would think that if they're making you sick that you should probably look into an alternative. As long as you get what you need, I don't see where that should be a problem.

[lmonter]

Just a question, on the days I don't remember to take my pre-natal vitamins, I have absolutely no m/s but on the days I take it I am so freakin' sick. Is this happening to anyone else? I've tried on both full/empty stomach and it is always the same result.
Yes. Happened during both my pregnancies with my kiddos. Not to mention I just *can't* swallow giant horse pills anymore, so I think I only took like 8 prenatal vitamins when I was pregnant with my 18mo. :duck: This time around I'm just taking 1-2 times the amount of kiddo gummy vitamins I give my 4yo (heh, when I remember, so I'm not OD'ing on anything by any stretch) and taking a folic acid supplement that's a nice, small, little pill.

[LacieD]

Our wee blob is absolutely perfect! She was measuring right on track (8w4d) and had a heartbeat of 177BPM. I can't even put into words how relieved I am! Bean and Wiggle (my 2 previous m/c babies) both stopped developing before this point, so I feel at least somewhat in the clear. Yay! She was starting to move around ever so slightly, too - so neat!

[Cardinal]

Hey guys! Well the baby is doing fine right now and I saw on the u/s the baby and a heartbeat. I think I am 8 wks and 3 days. I am very relieved, but like you guys are probably feeling, I am still nervous. Having a miscarriage just changes things... I think you always feel nervous, ykwim? Anyway, I am very excited. :) I have my next appointment on Dec. 3.

[BlueMoonBean]

Hey guys! Well the baby is doing fine right now and I saw on the u/s the baby and a heartbeat. I think I am 8 wks and 3 days. I am very relieved, but like you guys are probably feeling, I am still nervous. Having a miscarriage just changes things... I think you always feel nervous, ykwim? Anyway, I am very excited. :) I have my next appointment on Dec. 3.

:jumpers: yippee for a healthy :heartbeat!!!!! :) :)

I'm so glad to hear that... I had a HMN meeting last night, and I was wondering how your u/s went! :hug

[starlightsound]

I've had that happen to.... and have horrible constipation to boot (even when NOT pg I only have a movement once or twice a week, so you can imagine with all the extra iron...)

So I think I'm gonna get some kids gummy vitamin bears and some folic acid tabs and take those instead. it's gotta be better than not taking anything regularly, which is what I'm doing now...

I can't take the constipation from the iron. I'd recommend Floradix, it's a plant-based iron supplement so it won't bind you up as much. I get it at my local natural foods store. Oh, and Omega-3 helps get things "ahem" moving for me as well.

[Nimbus]

Just a question, on the days I don't remember to take my pre-natal vitamins, I have absolutely no m/s but on the days I take it I am so freakin' sick. Is this happening to anyone else? I've tried on both full/empty stomach and it is always the same result.

I took them before I got pregnant and used to have the same problem. I switched to taking my vitamin at night (& Omega-3 & other stuff) right before I go to bed.

LacieD & Cardinal -- glad you guys got good news!