View Full Version : DH Wavering




skybluepink02
11-27-2007, 10:34 AM
For the last year, DH has been right on board with not Circ'ing any boys we have. However, recently he was diagnosed with Lichen Sclerosis and has had some foreskin problems because of this. Of course, I'm firm on not circumcising, but DH says that he is begining to think if he had been circumcised, he wouldn't be having this problem. I pointed out that it occurs in circ'ed men too, but he is right when he says it's overwhelmingly in uncircumcised men. I'm not and will never consider circumcising a boy, but I would like DH to be firmly behind the decision, as he once was. Does anyone have information on the genetics of Lichen Sclerosis or how likely it is to be passed down? Again, even if it's genetic, we won't be circumcising our boy on a possiblility that he might get the disease, but I'd like some info to reassure DH.




LavenderMae
11-27-2007, 10:49 AM
I don't know a lot about it. But form my understanding the cause is unknown and it's more common in girls.

MCatLvrMom2A&X
11-27-2007, 11:38 AM
To me that falls under the heading of removing a girls breast at birth because her mom or female relatives have a high chance of breast cancer. Just because it is a issue for your dh dosnt mean that it will be for any boys you might have.

skybluepink02
11-27-2007, 11:42 AM
It is most common in women. It occurs in men occasionally. I'm trying to find something that says why it happens more often in uncircumcised men than circumcised. I'm hoping it's something like the penile cancer statistics where the statistics are skewed and people keep using them.

skybluepink02
11-27-2007, 11:45 AM
To me that falls under the heading of removing a girls breast at birth because her mom or female relatives have a high chance of breast cancer. Just because it is a issue for your dh dosnt mean that it will be for any boys you might have.

:) THis is the exact argument I used :lol He's said that I have good points, but he "can't help but think if I'd been circumcised, this wouldn't happen"

However, it's a mild, treatable disease that has a low probability of actually happening to our boys. I'll keep giving him reasons, but in the end, he's just going to have to suck it up if he doesn't like it.

carriebft
11-27-2007, 11:52 AM
Well, I think the thing is about this...at least from what little research Ive done, the moist, mucosal tissue of the foreskin and the way it leaves the glans makes them succeptible....but those things are also what makes having a foreskin so great! That moisture increases sensitivity and that mucosal and moist tissue is full of lots of nerve endings.

Circed penises are not as at risk because they are dry and calloused over and, obviously, they lack the tissue of the foreskin.

Claire and Boys
11-27-2007, 12:19 PM
Maybe intact men are more at risk of getting certain things like this, but being circed isn't exactly a guarantee of no penis problems - I'm thinking of the 10% of circed boys that wind up with meatal stenosis, I bet lichen sclerosis isn't anywhere near as common as that.

Quirky
11-27-2007, 12:26 PM
http://www.cirp.org/library/treatment/BXO/

BXO is a rare disease that affects only 6 of 1000 males (.6 of 1 percent).21 It can affect males of any age.21 The traditional treatment has been radical circumcision.16 However, many conservative treatment options are now available.

Mommiska
11-27-2007, 12:44 PM
Maybe intact men are more at risk of getting certain things like this, but being circed isn't exactly a guarantee of no penis problems - I'm thinking of the 10% of circed boys that wind up with meatal stenosis, I bet lichen sclerosis isn't anywhere near as common as that.

:yeah:

I don't have any links, I'm afraid, but I bet you could do a quick google search and find a mainstream board where moms are talking about their son's circumcisions and all of the problems that they cause.

Problems that are a lot more common (and a lot more serious) than your husband's current problem.

There's no telling what kind of complications your dh would have had if he'd been circumcised...

Bm31
11-27-2007, 01:56 PM
:yeah:

I don't have any links, I'm afraid, but I bet you could do a quick google search and find a mainstream board where moms are talking about their son's circumcisions and all of the problems that they cause.

Problems that are a lot more common (and a lot more serious) than your husband's current problem.

There's no telling what kind of complications your dh would have had if he'd been circumcised...

:yeah: To you and Claire both, you're right on the money. This whole notion "if only I'd been circ'd...." for every little problem an intact man has pales in comparison to the lifelong damage that can be done by a circ. There can be naturally arising problems with any body part, but the last thing any parent should want is to be the cause of the problems.

Ron_Low
11-27-2007, 02:34 PM
he was diagnosed with Lichen Sclerosis and has had some foreskin problems because of this. Of course, I'm firm on not circumcising, but DH says that he is begining to think if he had been circumcised, he wouldn't be having this problem.

He's probably right about cut guys not being troubled with LS. I heard that it affects about 1 in 3000 intact adult men or women, but I see estimates vary (probably due to inconsistent/inconclusive diagnosis). Protopic ointment usually gives relief.

If he's 1 in 3000, he should buy a lotto ticket, not cut someone's genitals.

AXEius
11-27-2007, 03:21 PM
tell him if he likes the idea of painful erections, scar tissue, a dry calloused glans without feeling, dissatisfaction with sex, loss of penile sensation, having little to no inner foreskin, and losing the prepucial sphincter many of these problems happen in 100% of circumcised men, then maybe circumcision might be worth considering for the unbelievably small chance of getting what he has now. to me its simple, 100% chance of many life altering problems, or a tiny chance of a few minor problems (which females are still at greater risk for all genital problems and yet they get to keep all their parts).

skybluepink02
11-27-2007, 03:52 PM
:) I talked to him more tonight. He said "I know you're right. I'm just upset about this happening" He's agreed not to argue anymore about it. :lol It wouldn't have happened anyways, but I'm glad he's behind it again, instead of a stumbling block. He's got OCD, so it's hard for him to move on from problems. He obsesses instead.

wannabe
11-29-2007, 02:32 PM
Just mention it the next time you have sex, point out what would be different/gone if he were circed - I'll bet THAT convinces him!

paquerette
11-30-2007, 06:38 AM
Poor guy. I'd just offer lots of emotional support wrt what he's gone through and steer conversations around decisions regarding hypothetical sons. Sounds like he's just venting and maybe saying things he doesn't really mean in the process. He'll come around; just give him the space to do so.