Epidural or none?

[mrspineau]

Just curious what you all are going to do.... I originally thought for sure that I wanted one but now my sister just recently had a baby and she didn't have time for one. She said really that it wasn't near as bad as she thought it would be without one... now I am undecided.

I have been reading a lot too about some of the cons of having one, and I am just wondering if any of you have any thoughts to share.

Thanks!

[Ligeia]

My first was a homebirth so the whole thing was natural. I can't imagine doing it any other way. It was not nearly as bad as I was expecting it to be (the pregnant brain can kind of throw things out of proportion:eyesroll). I used a hot shower or soaked in the bath a lot to help with the pain. Moving around constantly also helped. I liked being able to feel all of it completely because as it got stronger, I knew I was getting closer and closer. I feel like the pain is just something that is part of the experience, like getting a tattoo or scraping yourself up climbing a mountain. It makes it real and wonderful and that much more exciting when it's all over. :thumb

[pboj+1]

Before my first, I thought "why on earth experience pain if I don't have to". I got a great epidural, I went from excrutiating pain to total relief. I could feel my contractions, but they weren't painful. I felt I got to feel the birth but spare myself the pain.

With my 2nd, I was offered the epidural early (and thought, hey, let's spare myself even feeling that terrible pain altogether!); my water had broken late evening, and by 5 am I was uncomfortable and took the epidural -- but I was nowhere near the pain I felt with #1 when I got it. Once I took it, my labor slowed; I couldn't feel a thing, and I got this terrible reaction where I itched all over! It was so bad, they gave me benadryl via an IV. That drugged me worse than anything I did in college! I was numb, totally limp and very out of it. I did progress really really fast at that point (I think because the benadryl made me relax so much), but when it came to pushing, I couldn't even feel the contractions. Again, no pain, but not the labor I would want.

This time I am approaching this with an open mind. Assuming I feel the pain like I did with #1, I'll ask for the epi, but not until then. I will also talk w/the anesthesiologist about not getting such a high dose that I can't feel anything. I am very pro pain relief, and when approached in a logical way, I don't think it has to hinder a great birthing experience. I also believe that each of us perceives pain differently, and we have to do what feels right for us.

The nice thing is that if you are opting for a hospital birth, then you don't have to commit either way. Good luck :)

Jennifer

[alegna]

IMO it's not worth the risk for normal birth. There is a very real risk for mom AND baby.

I birth at home so that I can do my own thing and manage in my own space.

-Angela

[Dea]

This is a loaded question!
I don't want one. Although I'm having a home birth so it's not an option for me, but should I be transferred I still don't want one. (but if there is a need I will consider one)
There's evidence that they also drug the baby, so the baby isn't as alert when they are born, and I want an alert baby. There are so many wonderful things a newborn can do, and I want to experience them. Like if you lay him/ her on your belly they will crawl/ wiggle their way up to your breast to nurse. They have a "walking" reflex after they are born, but only for a short time. (it's how they work to kick their way out of your uterus) And I want to be able to look into my baby's clear eyes and see her personality. All of these things can be impeded by the drugs of an epidural.

There are also risks associated with them. You can get a spinal headache, which is when the needle isn't perfectly placed and you leak spinal fluid, which causes a worse than a migraine headache. (if this does happen drink lots of electrolytes to get your fluids back up to lessen the length and pain of the headache).
You may or may not need a lot of extra monitoring. A lot of times you will need an internal monitor, which can be a little pin like screw into the baby's head, or just a sticky pad thing on her/ his head, I think it varies. You may or may not be able to push as well, depending on the dose and when it wears off.
You may need a catheter, which I think would suck.
Also it's a needle in your spine, there are risks!

Now all of that being said, there is a time and place for one. If you are so exhausted that you can't go on and you keep pushing yourself to a breaking point where you actually can't go on and you end up with a section, perhaps an epidural could have prevented that. Or same situation and you don't get the epidural before the section and they have to put you completely under because they don't have time to put in an epidural, then you aren't even awake for the baby's birth. (this doesn't happen often, but it does happen)

I think it's fair to remember that medical science isn't evil, and these things were created and invented for a reason. People like to say that way back when before all of these medical inventions came around we still had babies, but a lot of women died in childbirth. Probably not with their first, but it was a leading cause of death for women. So epidurals aren't evil, but there is a time and place. I think it's fair to you and your baby to try not to have one, but they aren't evil.

[JennaW]

None for me. I think there are more risks involved with an epidural then the doctors would like people to believe.

I highly reccomend Henci Goer's, The Thinking Woman's Guide to a Better Birth, it goes over all of the common medical interventions, what they are, why they are used, how they are usually over used, how to avoid them, ect.. It is really great information that is proven with research. The book is very pro-homebirth but I think it is an essential read for us who have decided we feel more comfortable with a hospital birth. It's important to be informed about your choices either way.

[alegna]

People like to say that way back when before all of these medical inventions came around we still had babies, but a lot of women died in childbirth. Probably not with their first, but it was a leading cause of death for women. So epidurals aren't evil, but there is a time and place. I think it's fair to you and your baby to try not to have one, but they aren't evil.

Yes, medical science saves lives. And yes an epidural has a time and a place. But I hardly think an epidural has saved many lives.

-Angela

[2crazykids]

I had an epidural with my first and it slowed everything down, made me real sick, swollen like a tree trunk, and completely miserable. My birth sucked, and I regret every single moment. Thank goodness my baby was ok through it all but he couldn't breastfeed at all and I was throwing up too much to even hold him.

I had nothing with my second and it was a piece of cake. The contrax felt like mild cramps...I drove myself to the hospital at 7cm dilation and I never would have known! Easy birth, and no problems with nursing. I don't think birth pain is nearly as intolerable as we think. It's all in the brain. We have to believe that we can get through it and we will! :thumb

[LianneM]

I consciously knew and expressed that I just didn't need one when I was in labor with DS. It was a long labor, very hard work, but it wasn't something I needed pain relief for. I had a homebirth so it was all on my terms, I labored in water, etc. Loved it and will do it again.

I have seen friends on pitocin though, and cannot imagine going through that without an epidural. The pit-induced labors I've seen looked NOTHING like natural labor to me.

[mama to 2 girls]

Of course there are risks with everything but unless it is absolutely necessary I would not get one...

I got one with dd1, I was induced and was not progressing, as soon as I got the epidural I progressed very quickly, so in that particular situation an epiduaral prevented a c-sec for me.

DD2 was born in a FSBC and so any kind of pain relief was not an option.

If you choose to birth in a hospital than there is always that chance that something will happen that you might need one or just because it is there it is more tempting.

[DBZ]

I've birthed with and epidural and without and I prefer the without. For me the hardest part of labor was reletively short. I was so glad that I could get up and walk just an hour after giving birth. An hour after giving birth with an epidural I would have been lucky if I could wiggle my toes. I also wonder how the epidural makes the baby feel.

[lil_earthmomma]

I'm WWWWWWAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYY more terrified of a needle in my spine then I am of labor. Labor is hard work, and at times mighty unpleasant, but I wouldn't classify it in the same class as say... a root canal, or breaking my leg even. The beautiful part about natural labor is the breaks between contractions. It's clean, there is no residual feeling, and for those small periods of time you can rest, drink, eat, kiss your partner etc.

I also suggest reading some birth possitive literature. My fave is Ina Mays Guide to Childbirth.

[DreamsInDigital]

I've birthed with and epidural and without and I prefer the without. For me the hardest part of labor was reletively short. I was so glad that I could get up and walk just an hour after giving birth. An hour after giving birth with an epidural I would have been lucky if I could wiggle my toes. I also wonder how the epidural makes the baby feel.

:yeah: I'll be having my third homebirth and I couldn't imagine giving birth with an epidural ever again.

[moderngal]

I had one with DS and it was actually a good labor experience.

I will be doing everything I possibly can to avoid one with this baby though. I know more now, I trust my body more now, I have more confidence in myself now.

I think they key is to educate yourself. Being unsure or afraid is going to lead you down a bad path. Find out as much as you can and make a decision. Once you have decided "yes I want a natural birth" you will find ways to make it work (a doula, a birthing class, positive affirmations, etc). If you choose an epidural, make sure you know what exactly that means, be prepared for the way you will labor, have your partner ready and able to advocate for you and the baby, etc.

I recommend the book The Thinking Woman's Guide to a Better Birth. It's an excellent resource. :)

[ananas]

IMO it's not worth the risk for normal birth. There is a very real risk for mom AND baby.

I birth at home so that I can do my own thing and manage in my own space.

Same. Plus, I would never give up my birth experience for the epidural. I think we should be able to go through a few hours of pain for our children, anyway.

[so_blessed]

As long as you prepare for an unmedicated birth, and know what to expect in terms of the different stages (level of pain, self doubt, etc.), you should be fine without an epidural. I have had four unmedicated births, which I really appreciated. I was able to feel the urge to push and respond to it, had no meds slow down my contractions or pose a risk to my baby, and we were both alert at the time of delivery to fully enjoy the moment!

[the_lissa]

I had an epidural with my first birth, which was a planned home birth turned hospital transfer for maternal exhaustion. It was good because I was able to rest, baby was able to get into a better position, so I could dilate further, etc.

However, it hurt like freaking hell. Getting the epidural hurt way more than any contraction. My bp crashed and I had to have it turned off at one point. The catheter hurt so much. I had spinal headaches and backaches for weeks. It made me feel emotionally and physically disconnected from my labour. It contributed to both my pp hemorrhage and our breastfeeding problems.

My second baby was born at home, unmedicated obviously. Even though it hurt more, I had no desire for an epidural. My labour wasn't as long and I was able to eat and drink to keep my energy up.

I will never have an epidural again.

[Shiloh]

first child and second child were both born with some form of epi...
1st - ended up with four degree tearing due to inablity to push..
(thats a tear THROUGH YOUR RECTUM....sorry ;)

2nd - got epi in transition - what was the point....the painful part IMO is contractions, dilation, etc not pushing...
3rd - ALL natural no interventions, no drugs Nothing..
I healed so fast, got right up and went pee felt like me who gave birth not out of it or disconnected...I will try next birth to remove it as an option as I know how much better the drug free version was..and with a home birth planned there won't be anyone to answer my screams if in a low moment I say get me an epidural ;)

all I say you really need is options for natural pain relief, visualisation etc all lined up and ready to go. a walkman worked well for me to just be in the moment with my favourite music...balls, hair brushes, etc.

a supportive person (or more than one)
and knowing how to push helps don't skimp out on breathing practice you can't just automatically breathe in a panic situation practice it ;)

PS don't assume cause you want one you will get one either..
my third child it wasn't an option as the anesthesia dude was in a section...
I could have had it written in bold on my forehead, birthplan, tshirt..
I wouldn't have gotten one as dc3 was born in less than 1hr after we got to the hospital..
I couldn't get a tylenol either as the doctor was in the section...
a nurse delivered my child and she said they deliver a good number of babies (I think she said about 20%)

[New_Natural_Mom]

I don't want one. It can increase the chance of having a c-section and longer labor. We are using Hypnobabies and going natural all the way. I am also going to refuse Pitocin unless it is absolutely medically necessary.

[Mamato2boy]

My first two were 100% natural and I am going to try to do the same thing again this time! I think I am more afraid of a needle in my back than anything!

[Tiffanoodle]

I am also terrified of a needle in my back. I went into my first labor not necessarily wanting to be a "hero" but knowing that I react VERY strongly to medications and wanted to do it naturally. Well, there were other plans since labor stopped and the Dr. wasn't completely comfortable sending me home based on how I was feeling and the results of the nonstress test from that morning. (I was 41.5 weeks) I had a very long Pit labor with a couple doses of Demerol about 4 hours before the pushing began. I pushed for 3 hours and then ended up in an emergency c where they didn't even have time to do the epidural so they knocked me out completely. Definitely not my choice.

Second one, I was VERY against an epidural. I switched OB's at 37 weeks because the one I was going to informed me that she would want to do an epi at the first moment possible "just in case the VBAC failed" Uh, no. Water broke, had to have Pit to induce since there were no contractions, and got talked into 3 doses of Nubain 6 hours before he came out (with 5 pushes through 2 contractions).

This time my goal is no Pit, no Demerol, no Nubain, and DEFINITELY no epidural. Just a beautiful vaginal birth...possibly helped along by induction with non-pit measures. :)

[Tiffanoodle]

Oh, and you should have SEEN the looks on the nurses and doctors' faces when I told them I didn't want any drugs. They thought I was delirious. :lol

[patchynurse]

I don't want one. I am not planning on having one. That said. I do understand stuff happens and if I ended up in labor for 40 hours or became exhausted I'd consider it. They do have their place and time.

[ZARAMAMA]

nope, going all natural!

[pazerific]

i was never planning to have one with dd, since we were hoping for a home birth. we had to transfer and i had pitocin. it took 6 hours from the time i got the pitocin until dd was born, and there's no way it wasn't manageable. i had supportive people around me (dh, my parents, my mw and her apprentice) and they're really the ones who helped me get through it. like a pp said, there's nothing natural about a pitocin augmented labor, but for me it was necessary. (dd had a really strange hand/arm postition and i NEEDED something to help me get her out, and i would rather that than forceps or a vacuum.) but even if you have pit, you can still do it with out an epi.

on a side note, one of my bff's had a botched epi. she had spinal headaches for days. she says it really got in the way of bonding and breastfeeding for them--not to mention the HORRENDOUS headaches.

so no, no epi for me, thankyouverymuch! :)

[Beverly]

I've done it with and without. I vastly prefer without.

[Lousli]

Same. Plus, I would never give up my birth experience for the epidural. I think we should be able to go through a few hours of pain for our children, anyway.

I've read women describe their experience of childbirth as being drawn and quartered. I do not think this is the normal experience, but it can happen. I don't think it is appropriate to say what "we should" be able to do or not to do. I think you may be able to say for yourself, but every person has a different experience and makes their decisions based on that.

Having said that, I will say that although I have had two births with epidurals, I would very much like to have experienced natural birth. I know I was unprepared with my first, and my second was an extremely unusual situation. If I were to ever have another child, I would definitely prepare myself and hire a doula in an effort to have a natural childbirth.

[Barcino]

I have had two totally natural births until my first ended up in csection at the very end so I literally had only a spinal for the surgery. My second was 100% unmedicated. Had I known better though I probably would have taken the epidural at the end of my first birth to see if that helped me relax and help the baby get into better position. This has happened to friends of mine. And my sister in law pretty much avoided a csection after taking an epidural. She had to be induced due to preclampsia and she took the pit for long enough. She pretty much had a horrific birth until the epidural. She had been stuck for hours and hours at 4 and went from 4-10 in one hour after the epi and had some time to rest and get herself ready to push. SO I can see how at some points it might make sense.

So... I am planning on taking nothing for pain this time around and not worried about the pain really - but also keeping an open mind through the whole thing. I am ok with that - I cannot picture myself having an epidural but if things take a bad turn or if for some reason it makes sense at the time I am going to be ok with it too. And I know the risks so this would not a ouch it hurts I want one type of a decision.

This is an individual decision. To me I am not going to end up with a csection without trying other less invasive things first - had I been wiser I would have done that with my first. At least I would have known I had tried everything. My doula and midwife are 100% backing up my wishes and understand that I do not want pain medication unless we are running out of options. They think it is a great approach because both of them have seen the epi work. I would not chance it if it made no sense but I think with #1 I had a lot of pride and an obsession with a perfect birth and let me tell you a csection is not a perfect birth either. I am learning that labor is totally unpredictable and I will do my best to make it a beautiful experience no matter what curves I am thrown. Now what I cannot ever imagine taking are those other pain relievers that make you groggy. I cannot imagine that - ever! Demerol? Sounds like a total waste and I don't want to be loopy.

[thismama]

I find the whole 'oh pain is all in your head' argument offensive. I see it here a lot and it undermines the argument for natural birth IMO. Just because pain was all in your head for YOU doesn't make it so for other women. Or because you didn't have pain, etc., it's offensive to conclude that everyone can have a pain free birth. /rant

That said, I birthed my first naturally (long, very painful labour) and hope/plan to do the same again this time. The risks scare me, and by the time I was begging for an epi last time holding still long enough for one would have been terrifying and torturous. And the ecstatic feelings that accompany natural birth make the challenge of it worthwhile, for me.

[~patty]

I personally never wanted one. Just the thought of having something in my spinal cord and being confined to the bed is enough to deter me. I definitely recommend reading up on the pros and cons, because I think people assume that there are no side-effects from it because it is used so frequently.

Good luck with your decision.

[Barcino]

I agree that the thought of having something stuck with a needle in my spine make me weak just thinking about it :dizzy: To me is funny that women that are I want an epidural as soon as I get there because I am so afraid of pain are not afraid of that part. Yikes!

[mrspineau]

Thanks everyone.

In the town that I live in (a very small town) people seem to think that it is crazy NOT to have one. I am seriously thinking about not having one, and it is nice to get a sense of how tolerable the pain of natural labor may be.

[greenmom4]

I haven't had an epi with either of my two kiddos and I won't have one for this baby, either. For me, they aren't necessary. To be honest, it never really crossed my mind to have an epi.

[polishprinsezz]

first off welcome to mdc. as you can see this is a natural parenting forum. most of these women here go against the grain of mainstream parenting. you will learn alot here too. it is really nice to be able to connect and learn here. i wrote this paragraph below last nite but the server was very busy. make sure you check out the other topics in this forum. you will learn soo much.
I DONT THINK THE COMPLICATIONS THAT COULD ARISE FROM AN EPI ARENT WORTH THE RISK. FIRST OFF YES, LABOR CAN HURT BADLY. IT CAN BE MANAGED NATURALLY THOUGH. I WALKED THE WHOLE TIME MY LAST LABOR AND IT REALLY HELPS MANAGE THE PAIN. I THINK IT IS EASIER TO CONCENTRATE ON THE TASK AT HAND WITHOUT PAIN MEDICATIONS. IT IS SO NICE TO GET UP IMMEDIATLY AFTER YOU HAVE THE BABY AND MOVE AROUND. YOU CANT DO THAT WITH AN EPIDURAL. IT IS A SCARIER THOUGHT TO NOT BE ABLE TO MOVE OR FEEL MY LEGS THAN TO HAVE TO EXPERIANCE PAIN.THE MORE MEDICAL INTERVENTIONS YOU HAVE THE GREATER YOUR CHANCE GOES UP FOR A C-SECTION. I DECIDED A DRUG FREE BIRTH WAS FOR ME WHEN I READ THE BOOK ON THE BRADLEY METHOD.IT IS SO MUCH MORE REWARDING IN MY EYES.

[LolaK]

For me an epidural can lead to things I don't want to happen like slowing down of labor or a sleepy baby. I had a pretty fast labor the first time so it isn't like I was in pain for 24 hours.

I have friends who had epidurals and turned out fine though, for me there just wasn't any need. The pain hurt more then anything in my life, it hurt more then hell, but it was also totally managable.

I think very important for you OP, because is sounds like you are worried about the pain, is to do some reading (Henci Goer and Ina May are great ones) and take some kind of class to prepare yourself.

If you are birthing in the hospital be prepared for a possible feeling of panic when you get there. It can be very disorienting to leave your comfy home and go to the hospital where everything is bright, there are lots of people, nurses pushing drugs on you, etc. You might feel a little bit like a caged wild animal for a time - that's why I really think you should do your birth homework - you don't want to get scared into having an epidural when you didn't really need one.

[Teenytoona]

There was a thread about the pain in another forum (I forget which forum and what thread) where someone said that the pain of childbirth without and the pain of childbirth with epidurals (and the potential cascade that may issue from it) were two different kinds. Such as pain/recovery in labor with no medications/interventions is intense, but, generally, short lived (generally is important here, I know even the most natural birth can be rough to recover from). Whereas pain/recovery with epidurals and other interventions is manageable during labor, but with a generally increased recovery time and possible other recovery issues (again, generally, some folks come through it all well). The poster said something along the lines of rather have it all in one fell swoop than have to recover and be in pain a greater amount of time. That really made sense to me. Now granted I'm still waiting on this baby to arrive, so we shall what I say ultimately, (though I am planning a homebirth). But I think that seems to be a reasonable assessment of the differences.

But I also think that not having an epidural can allow a mom to stay more intouch with the changes in her body. For instance, my SIL went into labor and when she got her epidural, the process really halted.

Of course, everyone has to make their own decisions regarding their own particular experiences. But, my personal thoughts are, if women have been doing this since the beginning of time, I'm pretty sure I can do it too. I'm going to work at it, and struggle, but for me the experience and all the sensations will be worth it.

[NaturallyPeachey]

Thanks for the post. I was struggling with the Epi/Natural route myself, I'm due with #1. I've decided to go natural and believe me, I've stopped telling people because they just like to jump on it and beat me down with my decision. What is it to them anyways?

These are the reasons why I am going natural (barring any complications) after reading Dr. Sears book:
1. I react to meds. and have the worst luck out of any one I know. I'll be the woman who gets an epi. and the resulting complications like spinal headaches etc.
2. I've had a catheter in me once....that's all I'm going to say.
3. I'm terrified of some one poking something in my back close to my spine
4. The thought of my little guy crawling up my tummy to nurse fascinates me and I hope that we have the chance to see if it really does happen

Good luck with your decision! If you do go the natural route read up on it and do the relaxation techniques and exercises to help prepare you. It will be easier to do prepared then trying to wing it! :thumb

[Barcino]

Yes for sure prepare because it IS intense as all get out and it IS painful - I agree that it is manageable but it is a good thing to be prepared and to have a doula ;) :thumb

[pboj+1]

I find it really interesting that people are so terrified of the NEEDLE part of getting an epi. I had to get a spinal tap once to rule out meningitis -- it was exactly like getting the epi. It barely pinches. And if the catheter hurts after they place it, it means it needs to be adjusted (just like catheters in your IV shouldn't be hurting.) The needle doesn't stay in your back, btw, a catheter does.

I'm not advocating epis vs. not, just wanted people to be aware that getting one, in and of itself (not talking side effects) shouldn't be a painful experience at all.

[the_lissa]

Well getting the epidural hurt like freaking hell for me, and I had to be poked over a dozen times because they were having a hard time getting it in right because of mild scoliosis. IVs also hurt like hell for me no matter how they are placed, no matter who gives them, etc.

[elfinbaby]

I'm on birth #4 and I've never had one. I'm birth at home.

First, I'd say make sure you know the risks. That could be a HUGE deciding factor. Looking at Henci Goer's book esp. The Thinking Woman's Guide.

Second, and I've never birthed in a hospital so take what I say with a grain of salt, I would make sure that my careprovider and my hospital understood that I'm going to need freedom of movement, choice of birth position, to eat and drink, etc. It seems ridiculous to me that a woman should have to ask for these things but I know that if for some weirdo reason I had to birth in the hospital, it could be a very difficult experience if nurses were coming in and out, blaring lights were on the whole time, I was hooked up to IVs/EFMs, the made me stay in bed, etc. Frankly, I'd feel like a caged animal. Again, start reading - I think that will help you immensely by giving you an idea of what you might need while birthing w/o meds.

Third, I'd start looking for some relaxation technique info or a natural childbirth class. Not everybody needs it but I come from a small town too and I know what you mean that everybody thinks you HAVE to have meds. You don't but imo you have to educate yourself, prepare yourself, and commit to your optimal birth experience.

I did Bradley Method w/the first 2 kids and it's a good class. I even became a teacher. The childbirth ed. part of it is excellent! However, I need more than what I had learned in the relaxation dept. I moved on to Hypnobabies - it has a homestudy course that is outstanding. I'm using it now and wouldn't use anything else. Baby #3's birth was calm, peaceful, just beautiful. Hypnosis sounds kooky - I know, I've been there - but I think of it more of teaching yourself how to relax completely and easily. Check it out.

I think it's great that you are contemplating the possibility of an unmedicated birth. It's the best choice for healthy, low risk women if unforeseen complications don't arise imo. You can do it:)

April

[meowee]

I had three unmedicated births that were painful but manageable-- severe pain only at the very end. They empowered me and left me feeling really positive. Then I had a traumatically painful homebirth... what I experienced was devastating and indescribable, in terms of pain. So because of that, for my subsequent birth I had an epidural, and apart from being in the hospital (nasty nurse, unfamiliar environment) the experience of the actual birth was quite lovely and I have zero regrets. My daughter was born with her eyes wide open, cried well, and nursed well. She even continued to kick me like mad through each contraction-- she wasn't sedated at all.

It's an individual choice. Don't let anyone pressure you into one, or out of one.

[saving_grace]

I had the epi with my first which was a pit induced labor for pre-e. Before I got the epi, I was able to move around the room, rock in the rocking chair through contractions, change positions, etc. The pit made the contractions pretty intense and close together so I opted for the epi pretty early on. Once I got the epi, I was pretty much confined to the bed for the next 12 hours unable to feel my legs. It really slowed down my labor progression. The worst part was when they turned down the epi so I could feel the contractions in order to push but I was stuck flat on my back through it all - which is the worst position for mom during labor. Since I was flat on my back, I pushed for 3 hours until I was exhausted. I also opted for an additional push of pain meds through the epi during this time. The doctor gave me the option of a c-section or forceps. Neither option sounded good but I went with forceps and subsequently a 3rd degree episiotomy. :( Baby's head was bruised from the forceps and I felt I was mutilated. It would take well over a year for me to not feel anymore pain associated with the episiotomy scar. My son was taken away from me after only a brief introduction I suspect because the final push of pain meds I had opted for were surpressing his breathing. I did not get to hold him until 5 hours later and he had already been fed formula by the NICU nurses. It was very hard to get him to latch after that and he was very sleepy. In hindsight, I should have waited longer for the epi and wish I would have had a doula to help me cope better. My labor nurse was fresh out of college and had no idea how to help me. Barring any medical conditions that would necessitate a hospital birth, I am going the homebirth/natural route with this baby. It seems like alot of women I've met or talked to online that want homebirths or natural births have had bad hospital experiences with their first. I highly recommend seeing the documentary "The Business of Being Born".

[DawnLasp]

This will be my first child, and I do not know if I'm going with epi or natural. :confused:

My menstrual cramps are sometimes so bad that my blood pressure drops suddenly, I turn white and get cold sweats, my energy level plummets, I vomit, and my bowls do weird things. It usually lasts for about 2 hours, then goes away like night and day. I found that if I eat dairy in the days leading up to my period, that it would most certainly trigger these episodes. I think that dairy causes more inflammation in my body than I can handle during that time of the month. I have not eaten any dairy since I've started trying to get pregnant, and will not throughout the pregnancy.

With that said, I'm afraid of what my body may do under intense pain of child birth. :eek However, I do hate needles, and all other aspects of my life are extremely natural. :goorg: I'm in week 5, and I have a lot to learn about the topic. I read the entire thread up to this point, and have learned a great deal. Would anyone like to offer me some advise? :help

[seamama11]

That is a very loaded question. I had one with my son it although I really visualized a completely natural birth, my son was posterior, never turned and labor was very long and hard. I am not sure I had it in me to deliver vaginally had I not had a break and relief from the pain. This birth (due last week) I want more than anything to do naturally, but once again the baby is posterior.
I am more educated and confident so am hopeful. But I dont think it is fair for those mamas out there who act like an epi is evil. Each woman gets to choose for herself. I think it slows things down and does lead to the intervention train when used too early on. I was 7 cm, so close I know, when I opted for one, and it didn't slow me down at all, and I was able to turn it down right before pushing so I could feel the contractions/pressure, however at that point the best thing for me would have been to be able to squat or get on all 4s, to open my pelvis more and I wasnt able to do that because of the epi. I pushed for almost 3 hours and finally my dear son was born vaginally. Oh, and he nursed right away and was literally awake and alert all day minus one two hour nap. It is possible drugs got to him, but I didnt noticed anything. They put him right on my chest and he reared up to look at me and almost fell off...:)
Each to her own I suppose.
Heres to wishing for an epi-free birth this time around, but open to having one too.
Sarah

[mrspineau]

Thanks again. It really helps to come on here and discuss things with other mothers, people who have experienced what I am going to experience. There is a lot of knowledge on this board and I have found it helpful in so many ways.

I have been and will continue to read as much as I can about a lot of different things, epis, circumcision, GD, baby-wearing, and a lot of other topics that I want to be educated on.

I think that I am leaning toward NOT wanting the epi, but I guess in some way I am worried that when I am actually in the situation, I'll change my mind. lol I guess I'll just have to wait and see :)

[meowee]

With that said, I'm afraid of what my body may do under intense pain of child birth. :eek However, I do hate needles, and all other aspects of my life are extremely natural. :goorg: I'm in week 5, and I have a lot to learn about the topic. I read the entire thread up to this point, and have learned a great deal. Would anyone like to offer me some advise? :help

If you want to have an epidural or at least the option of one (which means you'll have to be in the hospital), have it administered as late in labor as your OB/MW will allow it. Some practitioners have policies that they won't put the epidural in after 8 cm-- so make sure you verify if there is a limit with your practitioner. Then make it clear that you want it administered as late as possible into labor. Then make sure you get a clear answer as to how long will elapse between your request and the actual administering of the epidural. So if it will take an hour to have it put in, request it around 6-7 cm with the hope that it will be put in around 8. Try to get at least to 5 cm before you request it.

If you end up being certain you don't want an epidural, it's probably best if you have a homebirth-- that way you can have freedom of movement, privacy, a warm bath to soak in through contractions. All those things help with pain management.

[the_lissa]

This will be my first child, and I do not know if I'm going with epi or natural. :confused:

My menstrual cramps are sometimes so bad that my blood pressure drops suddenly, I turn white and get cold sweats, my energy level plummets, I vomit, and my bowls do weird things. It usually lasts for about 2 hours, then goes away like night and day. I found that if I eat dairy in the days leading up to my period, that it would most certainly trigger these episodes. I think that dairy causes more inflammation in my body than I can handle during that time of the month. I have not eaten any dairy since I've started trying to get pregnant, and will not throughout the pregnancy.

With that said, I'm afraid of what my body may do under intense pain of child birth. :eek However, I do hate needles, and all other aspects of my life are extremely natural. :goorg: I'm in week 5, and I have a lot to learn about the topic. I read the entire thread up to this point, and have learned a great deal. Would anyone like to offer me some advise? :help

I have the same cramps issues. My cramps were as bad as labour in fact. If you are pron to bp drops, I would discuss it with your caregiver. A side effect of epidurals are bp drops. Mine dropped dangerously.

[the_lissa]

Thanks again. It really helps to come on here and discuss things with other mothers, people who have experienced what I am going to experience. There is a lot of knowledge on this board and I have found it helpful in so many ways.

I have been and will continue to read as much as I can about a lot of different things, epis, circumcision, GD, baby-wearing, and a lot of other topics that I want to be educated on.

I think that I am leaning toward NOT wanting the epi, but I guess in some way I am worried that when I am actually in the situation, I'll change my mind. lol I guess I'll just have to wait and see :)

You can always change your mind. You can plan and prepare for natural birth, but can change your mind in labour if you need to.

[DawnLasp]

I have the same cramps issues. My cramps were as bad as labour in fact. If you are pron to bp drops, I would discuss it with your caregiver. A side effect of epidurals are bp drops. Mine dropped dangerously.

Thank you, this is great information for me that caters to some of my specific fears. I have my first prenatal visit in a few weeks. I will definitely ask!

:Thanks

[the_lissa]

You're welcome. I remember being so scared of labour because I thought 'if my menstrual cramps, how the hell am I going to deal with labour?' But labour was about the same as my cramps, maybe a little more painful, but I found the break between contractions to be wonderful; whereas my cramps were quite constant.

Good luck.

[KrisM]

I had nothing with my second and it was a piece of cake. The contrax felt like mild cramps...I drove myself to the hospital at 7cm dilation and I never would have known! Easy birth, and no problems with nursing. I don't think birth pain is nearly as intolerable as we think. It's all in the brain. We have to believe that we can get through it and we will! :thumb

I don't think everyone's pain is the same, do you? Mine was like knives in my hip joints and down my thighs. Extremely sharp and localized and constant. The pain of the uterus contracting was nothing compared to that. Is that the type of pain you had and thought was mild cramps? I didn't get an epidural for a long time because I didn't want to slow down labor, but the pain was horrific. I did Bradley the first time and Hypnobabies the second time and neither method helped me relax at all. The tub helped, but not a ton.

The pain was most definitely not in my head. I trully believed I would have a no-drug labor and birth and kept telling myself I just had to change positions, etc. But, nothing worked, including the epidural actually.

[Barcino]

I must have missed that post about pain not being a big deal. That might have been your case - lucky! I did find my labors - both painful. VERY painful during transition and very intense. I did a good job relaxing and managing it - so for me the pain was manageable - I was very focused - but it was by no means in my head or not real. I think is ridiculous to dismiss other's pain just because you did not experience it. I would for sure prepare for pain and prepare to cope with it.

[MammaB21]

So, I am not prego, but hope you all don't mind if I pipe in on this one. :o

I had a naturall child birth with my DD. It was in a hospital, but with the midwives. The reason I chose to do it without an epidural, was because, in my opinion, epidurals can lead to other medical interventions. I didn't want any interventions, like an episiodomy, a vaccum birth, or a c-section. I aslo didn't want my waters broken, because once they break your waters your labor must progress in a certain amount of time. If I would have had an epidural, I feel like I would have been free game for the docs to proceed with any and all medical interventions. For me, it was much scarier to think of not being in controll, (since I am kinda a controll freak :innocent). I made sure to write a very strict birth plan. Even with that birth plan, I felt very pressured at times to do things I didn't want to do. I also had a few experiences where I felt very vialated. All in all, it was a beautifull water birth, but I will deffinately be planning my next one at home, where I know I can have the peacefull, empowering, and respected experience every women deservs. Happy birthing to all you mammas.

[lil_earthmomma]

I find it really interesting that people are so terrified of the NEEDLE part of getting an epi. I had to get a spinal tap once to rule out meningitis -- it was exactly like getting the epi. It barely pinches. And if the catheter hurts after they place it, it means it needs to be adjusted (just like catheters in your IV shouldn't be hurting.) The needle doesn't stay in your back, btw, a catheter does.

I'm not advocating epis vs. not, just wanted people to be aware that getting one, in and of itself (not talking side effects) shouldn't be a painful experience at all.

I'm not afraid because of the pain, I'm afraid of having a giant needle inserted into my spine!!! I kinda like my spine, and it has an important function. :lol

As for the pain in your head thing, I don't think the poster was saying labor is pain free, she was saying it's managable, and that getting all terrified about the horrible pain might not be the best way to mentally prepare. Our attitude and coping abilities are all in our mind. At least that's how I read her post.

As for the op, is there any way you'd consider a home birth or birth center birth? If you don't want an epi, but the community around you is very pro medical intervention, maybe you can be proactive some way?

[honeybee]

I think every woman should learn ncb tecniques and prepare some relaxation/coping techniques for birth, whether they plan on getting the epi as soon as their first contraction or not. I think it does women a disservice to portray the epi means every woman will get an automatic pain-free birth. Most women seem to have no clue that they may have to labor for a while before being allowed to get the epi or that they may not be able to get one at all. Or, the side effects may be worse than the labor pains. Learning all you can about normal birth and how to prepare can never hurt you, no matter what you end up deciding about the epi.

Also, keep in mind that very, very few women have normal physiological births. The problem is not with the epi persay, but with the cascade of interventions that causes labor to be more difficult and challenging than it needs to be that leads up to a "need" for the epi. The problem is with the whole way birth is "managed." The question, IMO, should not be "Do I want the epi?" but "Do I want a managed birth or a normal physiological birth?" Because whether you "need" the epi or not depends on a whole host of things that may happen before you actually make the epi decision.

So, assuming you go into labor on your own (which is a pretty big assumption in today's OB environment), this is what managed care looks like. First, you have to leave the comfort and security of your home environment. (My car ride to the hospital really sucked, and it was only about 20 minutes.) Next, they make you lie down in triage so they can strap a band to your belly and monitor contractions. Laying down on your back makes labor more painful and can potentially slow things down. Then some stranger you've never met (in my case a really sleep-deprived young resident) checks you for cervical dilation, potentially introducing bacteria and infection into your vagina.

Then, they determine whether you are truly in active labor. If you aren't in active labor, they used to send you home. Now they give you a room anyways and put you on a time clock. Either way, you are given an IV, told you can not eat or drink, you have a pulse monitor on your finger, and a blood pressure cuff on your arm, and you still have a EFM strapped to your belly continuously. Sure, you can get up and move about 2 feet away from the bed if you so choose, or maybe walk around a bit pushing the IV poll with you wherever you go...
unless of course the EFM catches some "heart decels" due to your movement making the monitor miss a few beats. Then you have to lay down in bed again. Movement helps make the pain manageable and the pain actually helps your body know how to move to make the baby move down best. The bed makes labor much more painful and impedes the progress of the baby.

Then, after an hour or two, and probably at least one more unnecessary vaginal exam, if things are not progressing at their preferred rate, they tell you that you need pitocin or will offer to break your water to help "speed things along." Or, maybe the doc will just break your water during the exam without bothering to ask you first. Now, you are on a time clock, and if you don't give birth within 24 hours, you're guaranteed a c-section. (or, it could cause a chord prolapse necessitating an emergency c). Breaking the waters can also make the contractions stronger and more difficult to manage, but as the baby is higher up than he might otherwise have been when your water breaks naturally, you will experience that more intense pain for a longer period of time. Baby also can't move as easily in order to shift into a better position if need be.

In some areas, 80-90% of women will end up with pitocin to augment their labors. Pitocin causes very strong, intense contractions that are much closer together and put more stress on the baby than normal contractions. And now you really are attached to the bed and the EFM, because pit can cause fetal distress and they have to be able to catch those heart decels in order to cover their asses.

So, you are experiencing magnified contractions, you are hooked up to numerous wires, things are blipping and beeping, you can't move much, you're dying of thirst, but they only offer you ice chips, the lights are bright, and the doc has pulled your dh aside to convince him to convince you to get the epidural so you can "rest" and so, not so incidentally, your hospital staff won't have to help you cope with the pain (which they are not trained to do, because "everyone" gets an epidural). This is not birth, this is torture, and is the reason the epi is lauded as a savior. The thing is, it's not saving you from the pain of "birth," it's saving you from the horrendous experience of a medically managed birth.

At least, if it works right, it saves you temporarily from the pain. Then it may cause your progress to slow, requiring more pit, which requires upping the epi dosage, which slows labor, so the pit is increased, potentially causing some disturbing heart rates, so they screw a metal rod in your baby's head in order to get a good read on the heart rate. After enough of this circular reaction, the baby may go into distress, requiring him to be "saved" by emergency c-section. Or, perhaps you will "only" need an episiotomy or forceps/vacuum to finally birth baby vaginally. Most likely you will at least tear due to having less feeling to push or from being in the ineffective lithotomy position.

Actually, I'm amazed the c-section rate is only 33%. It astounds me that nearly 70% of women are able to deliver vaginally despite all the things done to them to inhibit labor. I think that's a true testament to women's natural abilities to give birth even in the worst circumstances.

Of course birth doesn't have to be this way, even in a hospital. But you need to either be really lucky or really prepared, informed, and determined to fight for your rights for a normal birth if that's what you decide you want.

[pboj+1]

I think every woman should learn ncb tecniques and prepare some relaxation/coping techniques for birth, whether they plan on getting the epi as soon as their first contraction or not. I think it does women a disservice to portray the epi means every woman will get an automatic pain-free birth. Most women seem to have no clue that they may have to labor for a while before being allowed to get the epi or that they may not be able to get one at all. Or, the side effects may be worse than the labor pains. Learning all you can about normal birth and how to prepare can never hurt you, no matter what you end up deciding about the epi.

Also, keep in mind that very, very few women have normal physiological births. The problem is not with the epi persay, but with the cascade of interventions that causes labor to be more difficult and challenging than it needs to be that leads up to a "need" for the epi. The problem is with the whole way birth is "managed." The question, IMO, should not be "Do I want the epi?" but "Do I want a managed birth or a normal physiological birth?" Because whether you "need" the epi or not depends on a whole host of things that may happen before you actually make the epi decision.

So, assuming you go into labor on your own (which is a pretty big assumption in today's OB environment), this is what managed care looks like. First, you have to leave the comfort and security of your home environment. (My car ride to the hospital really sucked, and it was only about 20 minutes.) Next, they make you lie down in triage so they can strap a band to your belly and monitor contractions. Laying down on your back makes labor more painful and can potentially slow things down. Then some stranger you've never met (in my case a really sleep-deprived young resident) checks you for cervical dilation, potentially introducing bacteria and infection into your vagina.

Then, they determine whether you are truly in active labor. If you aren't in active labor, they used to send you home. Now they give you a room anyways and put you on a time clock. Either way, you are given an IV, told you can not eat or drink, you have a pulse monitor on your finger, and a blood pressure cuff on your arm, and you still have a EFM strapped to your belly continuously. Sure, you can get up and move about 2 feet away from the bed if you so choose, or maybe walk around a bit pushing the IV poll with you wherever you go...
unless of course the EFM catches some "heart decels" due to your movement making the monitor miss a few beats. Then you have to lay down in bed again. Movement helps make the pain manageable and the pain actually helps your body know how to move to make the baby move down best. The bed makes labor much more painful and impedes the progress of the baby.

Then, after an hour or two, and probably at least one more unnecessary vaginal exam, if things are not progressing at their preferred rate, they tell you that you need pitocin or will offer to break your water to help "speed things along." Or, maybe the doc will just break your water during the exam without bothering to ask you first. Now, you are on a time clock, and if you don't give birth within 24 hours, you're guaranteed a c-section. (or, it could cause a chord prolapse necessitating an emergency c). Breaking the waters can also make the contractions stronger and more difficult to manage, but as the baby is higher up than he might otherwise have been when your water breaks naturally, you will experience that more intense pain for a longer period of time. Baby also can't move as easily in order to shift into a better position if need be.

In some areas, 80-90% of women will end up with pitocin to augment their labors. Pitocin causes very strong, intense contractions that are much closer together and put more stress on the baby than normal contractions. And now you really are attached to the bed and the EFM, because pit can cause fetal distress and they have to be able to catch those heart decels in order to cover their asses.

So, you are experiencing magnified contractions, you are hooked up to numerous wires, things are blipping and beeping, you can't move much, you're dying of thirst, but they only offer you ice chips, the lights are bright, and the doc has pulled your dh aside to convince him to convince you to get the epidural so you can "rest" and so, not so incidentally, your hospital staff won't have to help you cope with the pain (which they are not trained to do, because "everyone" gets an epidural). This is not birth, this is torture, and is the reason the epi is lauded as a savior. The thing is, it's not saving you from the pain of "birth," it's saving you from the horrendous experience of a medically managed birth.

At least, if it works right, it saves you temporarily from the pain. Then it may cause your progress to slow, requiring more pit, which requires upping the epi dosage, which slows labor, so the pit is increased, potentially causing some disturbing heart rates, so they screw a metal rod in your baby's head in order to get a good read on the heart rate. After enough of this circular reaction, the baby may go into distress, requiring him to be "saved" by emergency c-section. Or, perhaps you will "only" need an episiotomy or forceps/vacuum to finally birth baby vaginally. Most likely you will at least tear due to having less feeling to push or from being in the ineffective lithotomy position.

Actually, I'm amazed the c-section rate is only 33%. It astounds me that nearly 70% of women are able to deliver vaginally despite all the things done to them to inhibit labor. I think that's a true testament to women's natural abilities to give birth even in the worst circumstances.

Of course birth doesn't have to be this way, even in a hospital. But you need to either be really lucky or really prepared, informed, and determined to fight for your rights for a normal birth if that's what you decide you want.

Wow! I agree that the more informed we are, the better. And if we have strong desires for things to happen a certain way, then we need to find out if our caregiver(s) and/or facility can accommodate that. However, I've had 2 "medically managed" deliveries, and I wouldn't describe them as "horrible" or "torture" or anything like that at all.

The facility I deliver at and my doctors only "require" fetal monitoring 15 minutes every hour. So I walked a lot. When labor was slow in the start, I was asked if I wanted to go home, or stay put. And the list goes on.

I think the key is information. For what is "torture" to one, is fine to another.
Just my perspective.

Jennifer

[ScotiaSky]

I think every woman should learn ncb tecniques and prepare some relaxation/coping techniques for birth, whether they plan on getting the epi as soon as their first contraction or not. I think it does women a disservice to portray the epi means every woman will get an automatic pain-free birth. Most women seem to have no clue that they may have to labor for a while before being allowed to get the epi or that they may not be able to get one at all. Or, the side effects may be worse than the labor pains. Learning all you can about normal birth and how to prepare can never hurt you, no matter what you end up deciding about the epi.

Also, keep in mind that very, very few women have normal physiological births. The problem is not with the epi persay, but with the cascade of interventions that causes labor to be more difficult and challenging than it needs to be that leads up to a "need" for the epi. The problem is with the whole way birth is "managed." The question, IMO, should not be "Do I want the epi?" but "Do I want a managed birth or a normal physiological birth?" Because whether you "need" the epi or not depends on a whole host of things that may happen before you actually make the epi decision.

So, assuming you go into labor on your own (which is a pretty big assumption in today's OB environment), this is what managed care looks like. First, you have to leave the comfort and security of your home environment. (My car ride to the hospital really sucked, and it was only about 20 minutes.) Next, they make you lie down in triage so they can strap a band to your belly and monitor contractions. Laying down on your back makes labor more painful and can potentially slow things down. Then some stranger you've never met (in my case a really sleep-deprived young resident) checks you for cervical dilation, potentially introducing bacteria and infection into your vagina.

Then, they determine whether you are truly in active labor. If you aren't in active labor, they used to send you home. Now they give you a room anyways and put you on a time clock. Either way, you are given an IV, told you can not eat or drink, you have a pulse monitor on your finger, and a blood pressure cuff on your arm, and you still have a EFM strapped to your belly continuously. Sure, you can get up and move about 2 feet away from the bed if you so choose, or maybe walk around a bit pushing the IV poll with you wherever you go...
unless of course the EFM catches some "heart decels" due to your movement making the monitor miss a few beats. Then you have to lay down in bed again. Movement helps make the pain manageable and the pain actually helps your body know how to move to make the baby move down best. The bed makes labor much more painful and impedes the progress of the baby.

Then, after an hour or two, and probably at least one more unnecessary vaginal exam, if things are not progressing at their preferred rate, they tell you that you need pitocin or will offer to break your water to help "speed things along." Or, maybe the doc will just break your water during the exam without bothering to ask you first. Now, you are on a time clock, and if you don't give birth within 24 hours, you're guaranteed a c-section. (or, it could cause a chord prolapse necessitating an emergency c). Breaking the waters can also make the contractions stronger and more difficult to manage, but as the baby is higher up than he might otherwise have been when your water breaks naturally, you will experience that more intense pain for a longer period of time. Baby also can't move as easily in order to shift into a better position if need be.

In some areas, 80-90% of women will end up with pitocin to augment their labors. Pitocin causes very strong, intense contractions that are much closer together and put more stress on the baby than normal contractions. And now you really are attached to the bed and the EFM, because pit can cause fetal distress and they have to be able to catch those heart decels in order to cover their asses.

So, you are experiencing magnified contractions, you are hooked up to numerous wires, things are blipping and beeping, you can't move much, you're dying of thirst, but they only offer you ice chips, the lights are bright, and the doc has pulled your dh aside to convince him to convince you to get the epidural so you can "rest" and so, not so incidentally, your hospital staff won't have to help you cope with the pain (which they are not trained to do, because "everyone" gets an epidural). This is not birth, this is torture, and is the reason the epi is lauded as a savior. The thing is, it's not saving you from the pain of "birth," it's saving you from the horrendous experience of a medically managed birth.

At least, if it works right, it saves you temporarily from the pain. Then it may cause your progress to slow, requiring more pit, which requires upping the epi dosage, which slows labor, so the pit is increased, potentially causing some disturbing heart rates, so they screw a metal rod in your baby's head in order to get a good read on the heart rate. After enough of this circular reaction, the baby may go into distress, requiring him to be "saved" by emergency c-section. Or, perhaps you will "only" need an episiotomy or forceps/vacuum to finally birth baby vaginally. Most likely you will at least tear due to having less feeling to push or from being in the ineffective lithotomy position.

Actually, I'm amazed the c-section rate is only 33%. It astounds me that nearly 70% of women are able to deliver vaginally despite all the things done to them to inhibit labor. I think that's a true testament to women's natural abilities to give birth even in the worst circumstances.

Of course birth doesn't have to be this way, even in a hospital. But you need to either be really lucky or really prepared, informed, and determined to fight for your rights for a normal birth if that's what you decide you want.

Hmmm were you at my birth? Cause its sounds just like the birth of my DS.

He was a hospital transfer for being post dates and my water had been broken for almost 24 hours and no contractions. So Pit was started and well it went all down hill from there. In spite of me being very informed.

So I've had a hospital birth with an epidural and a Birth House birth with no Meds.
I prefer the NO Meds birth a million times more then the one with the Epidural.
Having a epidural did not mean a pain free birth for me...it just spread the pain out over weeks recovering rather then a few hours of labour and pushing.

Giving birth in a comfortable environment with people I knew and knew what I wanted for my birth and were willing to help make it happen makes all the difference. It was an amazing experince that I personally never would have been able to have in a hospital.

Yes I felt pretty happy that I had had my son and avoided a C-section by the skin of my teeth but it had nothing on the high feeling and well being I had after the birth of my daughter.

[mkmama]

thismama had a great point in her previous post. I wasn't going to post as i felt bad saying i couldn't handle the pain.

But after reading many many birth stories, grieving my birth, and talking to many moms/midwives...i did have a very hard labor. But my desire for an all natural birth got in the way...I was so stubborn and determined even tho the pain was unbearable and i was utterly exhausted...i wouldn't do the epidural or any pain medicine.

My body gave out and i ended up with an emergency c-section. I wish i had gotten an epidural.

that said, this round with #2 i will still go for an all natural birth...i pray it is faster and easier and more tolerable as many of you ladies describe...as i never go to push my son out, i did get to 9.5 cm naturally before the spinal for the c-s.

But my stubborness/pride in saying "women should be able to handle it" will not be my motivation this time. Doing what is right for me and my situation will be what makes my decision. I will be so happy if I can have a VBAC. If that means getting an epidural (i hope not), then it doesn't make me less of a woman b/c I didn't go naturally as I dream.

Do what is right for you and dont' worry about anybody else's expectations. I advocate all natural, no epidural...but don't let your stubborness lead you to a dangerous rode like I did.

[honeybee]

Wow! I agree that the more informed we are, the better. And if we have strong desires for things to happen a certain way, then we need to find out if our caregiver(s) and/or facility can accommodate that. However, I've had 2 "medically managed" deliveries, and I wouldn't describe them as "horrible" or "torture" or anything like that at all.

The facility I deliver at and my doctors only "require" fetal monitoring 15 minutes every hour. So I walked a lot. When labor was slow in the start, I was asked if I wanted to go home, or stay put. And the list goes on.

I think the key is information. For what is "torture" to one, is fine to another.
Just my perspective.

Jennifer

Jennifer, I'm guessing you did not have pitocin, if you were only monitored once an hour, is that correct? The more interventions you are able to avoid, the better the overall experience, most likely. I was speaking in generalities of a very common and typical birthing scenario in our culture... and I do think most women in our culture experience birth as "torture..." otherwise why all the horrified comments about going without an epidural? But, most women don't truly experience normal physiological "birth." They experience a medically managed birth.

Of course not all medically managed deliveries are torture. I actually had a pretty decent hospital birth with my first. I had more interventions than I had planned on, but in the end had a good, unmedicated labor. But I think that was due to a combination of being lucky (good position of baby, and hereditarty tendency to fast labors), choosing a good caregiver, and being relatively well informed. Even so, being strapped to the bed with the IV and EFM WAS torture. Luckily, it was not torture I had to endure for very long because I DID end up getting up... but that darn EFM was still strapped to me the whole time, and my doula had to hold it to my belly as I moved so it wouldn't skip traces, "requiring" me to get back in bed. Then I figured out I could just hide out in the bathroom, and things went better.

And, of course, there are cases where an epi is really needed. There are moms who have really difficult labors even with the best support and laboring environment. I think that's evidenced by the fact that most hb mw I talk to say most all of their transfers are 1st time moms with a posterior or other difficult presentation, who go for the epidural to allow them to rest and still have an opportunity to birth vaginally. How wonderful that option is available in this day and age.

My point is that the question about how to birth is a lot more complex than just "should I get the epi." There are a whole host of other things that come into play, and you can't separate each one out. You have to look at the whole picture.

[pboj+1]

Jennifer, I'm guessing you did not have pitocin, if you were only monitored once an hour, is that correct? The more interventions you are able to avoid, the better the overall experience, most likely. .

Well, my first was pitocin free -- which after laboring for two weeks, and taking drugs to hold it off, seemed to make sense ;) I was actually allowed less walking with this one, I don't remember why, but something to do with the fact that I was on antibiotics (having been ruptured so long) and other stuff....

With my 2nd, I didn't start pitocin till much much later in the process. Once the pit started, I was allowed to get up and use the bathroom, but no more "hall walking" -- I actually forgot about that. What was so unusual in my case, they say, is that my labor was moving along "nicely" all by itself; around midnight I allowed her to break my water (I must say, it was totally my choice!) I was really hoping to avoid 20 hours of labor like with my first. Then, much to her amazement, my labor halted! I was prepared for fast and furious labor.... anyhow, that's what made the pitocin decision . . .. . and the epi didn't come for another 5 hours or so (followed by the benadryl for the bad reaction.)

Believe, me I hear you loud and clear. Once they "mess" with any part of the natural labor process, it invites in a whole host of additional interventions. Hence, my finding this board, and wanting to plan a more natural birth process, with my own understanding that I'm likely to choose an epi at some point . . .. What I will do differently -- Stay at home till it hurts like hell; not allow the water to be broken to speed it along; and not accept an epi unless I NEEDED it. Having taken it too soon with #2 slowed things down, and that sucked.

Jennifer

[almadianna]

nope. not at all. i am having a home birth btw.

[YouKnowMe]

I had two attempts with an epidural but neither time were they effective. This last birth was all natural using Hypnobabies. I can honestly say I felt NO pain. It was defintely intense and there were a couple times I thought for a moment "what have I done", but I would have 50 more births if they could be as beautiful, empowering and healing as the birth of DD!

Our bodies are designed to give birth! Women are perfectly capable! Regardless of what the medical model and the media tells us.