Queer & Pregnant & due in December '08

[MujerMamaMismo]

I've noticed quite a few Dec DDC members with little rainbow ribbons in their sigs and I know some of you from other places but I thought it would be interesting to get a little thread going here...it's seems like we definitely have the numbers for it!

I'm Jess and my DP and I have been together for almost 7 years. I'm 29 and she's 27. This will be our first baby and although several of our other lesbian friends are TTC or near to TTC, we will be the first in our immediate group of friends to have a kid. It's going to be quite a change for our little community and I imagine some challenges, particularly as our closest friends are quite anti-kid.

I have loads of fears and lots of excitement around being a queer mama and look forward to sharing more with you all over the next 8 months :D

So, who else is around? Come out, come out, wherever you are!

[JenInMpls]

I'll jump in although I fear we're going to get relocated to the queer parenting forum - although I feel we shouldn't be - since this isn't about parenting, it's about being queer, pregnant and due in December 2008!!!

[Munki'sMom]

I'm straight but wanted to say hi and congrats!!!!! I think you are welcome here! Things will change for you but in a great way! Your friends will become jealous and end up having babies soon I assume. ;) You'll love being a mommy! Heck your going to have it good actually, 2 mommies in the house! Dream come true. lol Wishing you lots of luck and support. :)

[naturalmamaof1]

I love the idea of two mommies in the house!!! You guys got it made!

[chic2chic]

I love the idea of two mommies in the house!!! You guys got it made!

:yeah:

[JenInMpls]

I love the idea of two mommies in the house!!! You guys got it made!

ohhhhhhhh... you'd be surprised... at how much my wife is like a husband :lol

no, I'm totally serious.

slovenly? check. watches me clear the table after having put the kid to bed while sitting at her computer when she KNOWS I feel sick to my stomach? check. can't throw her clothes into a hamper but throws them on the floor instead? check.

I could go on but it would sound like I don't love her and I do :love

[MujerMamaMismo]

ohhhhhhhh... you'd be surprised... at how much my wife is like a husband :lol


:love I'm lucky. My DP is totally devoted to making this pregnancy really special and nice and easy for me.

The first few days after the BFP I was a bit worried - DP was shocked and very disengaged but now that the news has settled, she is a complete gem!

I'm very spoilt!

[JenInMpls]

oh, well, I'm spoiled too, in that my wife is very excited about #2 (after taking years to come around to the thought of having 2 children - she's an only child), and she will do whatever she can out-of-the-ordinary to make me feel comfortable or better, like taking us out for pizza tonight - it's just the small, everyday stuff that is just *her* that gets me. Like if she would unload the dishwasher, hang up her own coat, put her toothpaste back in the medicine cabinet and her underwear in the hamper, that would go much further toward making me feel better than constantly asking "Is there anything I can do for you?" when I grumble about my nausea. (Because if she asks that and I say "yeah, you can put your clothes in the hamper and hang up your own coat and clean the cat box before I have to beg you because it's totally going to make me barf if I have to smell it another day!" - that's just NAGGING, you see.)

Maybe it's because we're an old married couple :wink (we'll have been together 9 years end of May)

[JennM1021]

"Is there anything I can do for you?" when I grumble about my nausea. (Because if she asks that and I say "yeah, you can put your clothes in the hamper and hang up your own coat and clean the cat box before I have to beg you because it's totally going to make me barf if I have to smell it another day!" - that's just NAGGING, you see.)

Maybe it's because we're an old married couple :wink (we'll have been together 9 years end of May)

Ha!!! I totally get it!!! DW has been so sweet...trying to do so many extras. Actually, she's been doing it the entire time we've been TTC'ing. But...honestly...I can't get her to do her laundry before it is overflowing all over the floor! And once she does do it...she can't put it away if her life depended on it!! She just pulls stuff out of it all week...looks at me and says..."this isn't too wrinkled is it?" Uh...yeah...it is. AND...it's annoying me!!! :angry

Ok...enough for my venting. Honestly, DW is the best. I am completely OCD...and I know it. So, she deals with a lot from me. We've only been together for 3 years...but knew right away we were soul mates. I was in a prior relationship for 8 years...and never once thoght about children. But now, I am so proud of our family...and can't wait to make it a little bigger. :D
I'm 31...blah...31...that still sounds strange. I can remember when I thought people in their 30's were ancient!!! Now...I seriously wonder if I am "grown up" enough for all this!! My how times change. :o DW is 29...going to turn the big 3-0 in a little over a month.

Anyway...I'm absolutely ecstatic to be here with you ladies...and SOOO looking forward to the next 8 months!!! :D

[Starfish11]

Welcome, welcome, welcome :)

How are your towns in regards to gay rights? I hope you are surrounded by support.

[JennM1021]

Hey Starfish...I see you are a Baltimore mama to be as well!!! :thumb Actually...I live in Glen Burnie right now...and we're pretty sure we don't want to raise our child there. I think we might need to be somewhere that's a little more progressive. I feel pretty comfortable in Baltimore...but we'll see. Anyway, so nice to see another B-More mama on this thread! :)

[tigermiep]

hi, ladies!

DW says she will take on more as I get more pregnant, but I'm still the happy homemaker (uh, who works outside the home...).

Jenn -- I'm 31, too. :) DW is 36. I'm the young'un.

[simcon]

Hi everyone!

My partner and I have been together 10 years, and have a 5 year old, so this will hopefully be #2 for us! We've lived in a bunch of places since Maddie was born--urban, rural, conservative, progressive--and luckily it's all been fine so far being a 2-mom family. My biggest surprise lately is how many of our new friends in this place (we've been here about 3.5 years) have assumed that I had sex with our donor to get pregnant---aaaaaah, no, not last time, not this time, not ever! But aside from having to have a somewhat embarassing conversation (and for me that's a lot, since I share with pretty much everyone who doesn't run away the technicalities of queer conception..), that erroneous assumption is easily dispensed with!

I adore my partner, and she's very sweet when I've been pg, and she also is kind of messy and doesn't much like to cook, so I'm in a similar boat as Jen and Jenn in that respect! Though I have to say, we have very complementary parenting styles, so that's been good.

[Kierdan'sMom]

I'm queer and DID, but I'm in a hetero relationship :lol God only knows where that puts me!

[JennM1021]

Ladies...I'm very excited!!! I just got my second round of blood work back and my double time is well within the normal range!!! :D:D They say 48-72 hours is normal...I'm 57...so good to go. :thumb They want me to go back for another round of tests Monday just to make sure it's still progressing ok. Anyone else's DR send them for round after round of bloodwork??? I mean..I'm glad to know everything is ok...but part of me is just a ball of nerves all day waiting for that call.

On another note...my dogs have been really really lovey and clingy the past few days. They hang all over me!!!! It's so cute...almost like they know something is up. Wierd! I love my babies. :love

[simcon]

I think RE's are a little overzealous (some fertility treatments have bigger risks for multiples and early m/c--plus most people who go to RE's have put lots of money and effort into getting pregnant, so do better with lots of reassurance.), and their protocols all differ somewhat. Mine had me come in for bloodwork on days 14 and 17, and then I'll have an ultrasound at 5w6d and another at 7w6d before they send me packing, but I have heard of others who do more repeated betas than mine does.

Yay for doubling HCG--congrats! :)

[JennM1021]

Yeah, I see your point. I mean...they're probably mostly dealing with women you actually HAVE fertility issues to begin with. Me...I was just missing the "goods" if you know what I mean. :wink Anyway, we've done one at 14DPO, 16DPO and we'll do one at 20DPO. They made it sound like if my numbers were still doubling...they'd leave it at that. Oh...and yeah...ultrasound between 6-7 weeks. THEN...they'll send me on my way. :D

[simcon]

Yeah, I see your point. I mean...they're probably mostly dealing with women you actually HAVE fertility issues to begin with. Me...I was just missing the "goods" if you know what I mean. :wink Anyway, we've done one at 14DPO, 16DPO and we'll do one at 20DPO. They made it sound like if my numbers were still doubling...they'd leave it at that. Oh...and yeah...ultrasound between 6-7 weeks. THEN...they'll send me on my way. :D

Mine I actually started with for the same reason as you, but then lo and behold, found fertility issues to deal with after many months (Hashimoto's thyroiditis, in fact, so I'm on synthetic thyroid hormone for the forseeable future at this point!). And then my IUIs weren't working either, with sperm that our donor had flown in to freeze, so I ended up getting pg on the third cycle of Clomid, with a trigger shot and fresh insems. It was all kind of odd after getting pregnant quickly with my first 2 pregnancies, completely DIY at home on the 2nd and 1st tries, respectively (same known donor). I'm so glad I finally got pregnant again--I was starting to become convinced that I was too old or something! (I'm 34 with fine #'s on all their blood tests except for the thyroid one, so my worry was in spite of all that...)

[JenInMpls]

I'm queer and DID, but I'm in a hetero relationship :lol God only knows where that puts me!

Hrm, how about "among friends"? :lol I don't think that anyone is going to (hopefully) get into any arguments about heterosexual privilege here... although I know those fights - no, debates - no, discussions - um - whatever - go around the queer parenting forum now and again.

Anyone else's DR send them for round after round of bloodwork???

bloodwork? *blink blink* I think it must be the working with an RE, because my midwife took my word that my pee stick was positive and made me an appt for 8 weeks out (Tuesday, FINALLY!). Glad that I am not chasing around getting all that bloodwork - can't imagine dragging a child with me to do *that* every day.

eta: simcon: I'm 34 too and managed to get pregnant in time to give birth before reaching that (obnoxious, ridiculous) big red flag of 35!!!

etaa: miep: I didn't know that M is closer to 40 than 30!!! teeheeheeheehee!!! :wink

[tigermiep]

bump!

bump bump!

hi.

so, are you other queer preggos planning to join any kind of LGBTQ family organization? Our usual tribe is not so full of the queers with kids (Jen and her fam are the exception).

[JenInMpls]

miep which season of the L Word did you watch this weekend? :lol I had to ask and it seems that no one, in any of the other Dec 08 threads, wants to actually have a conversation - or maybe it's that there are just way too many women - which there are.

We've yet to get into Rainbow Families although I'm starting to think that we should because T is starting to get to the age when he's noticing he doesn't have a daddy while all of his friends do, and we only have a couple of other sets of friends - one in Duluth, a bit far away until we get that high speed commuter rail line :bgbounce - who are two-mom families.

I had (and my friend had) a very interesting experience, which I must first set up for you: in my Sept 04 DDC I met a woman who, at the time, was living in Tanzania where her husband was doing PhD research. In May 04, they moved back to the US. To Mpls. To 1.5 blocks away from us. :D we became great friends and her son Ozzy was born 8 days before mine. They grew up together, played all the time, and had a special understanding that they had with none of the other neighborhood pals.

They moved to Champaign, IL in August of 07 which left a gaping hole in our lives - not only the loss of my son's best friend but of my best friend too :( besides my partner, there was no one I trusted more with my son than her - not even my mom. Sh**, do I still miss her. Sigh.

We went to visit them in September 07 for the boys' birthdays and it was the first time Ozzy had ever spent a lot of time with both me and my partner and T, and he really paid attention to how T interacted with us, and how we talked to him, etc.

Up until that visit, he had always called his mother "mommy", which is what T calls my partner (I'm "mama"). After that visit, Ozzy took to calling his mother "mama". I guess it seemed to him that my kind of parenting was more in line with his mother's parenting style than my partner's, and since my partner was mommy and I was mama, then his mother should also be mama, to align with me.

He also told his mom that my partner was a "very angry girl". :eek

Just an interesting aside that maybe belongs in the queer and pregnant thread but I'm not re-typing it :lol and it has to do with the lgbtq parenting thing. so there. :D

[MujerMamaMismo]

We have a glbt playgroup nearby which I'll definitely be jumping into as soon as Squeak is born. I'm also a member of our Rainbow Families Council and have several friends who are too. We live in a bit of a dykes with kids mecca and consider ourselves to be very very lucky.

So, for those of us who are having our first, who have you told and how are people responding? We've only told people really close to us and even then, I was worried that people wouldn't embrace it as an exciting event for DP but so far people have been just as thrilled for her as they have for me. I'm so pleased.

DP is having a hard time trying to tell her mum though because she's always stressed and is jealous of DP. If she tells her at the wrong moment, her Mum is likely to say something rude and make DP feel like shit.

I told my Mum yesterday and she is beyond ecstatic. :D

[MujerMamaMismo]

btw Jen - I've now watched the whole 5th season of L Word. It was definitely better than the previous few seasons but still not as great as the first.

[JenInMpls]

btw Jen - I've now watched the whole 5th season of L Word. It was definitely better than the previous few seasons but still not as great as the first.

Well, it would be difficult to trump all of that gratuitous sex... :lol

seriously, were *any* of the following seasons as sex-laden as the first?

[tigermiep]

I watched the 4th on surfthechannel. it was addictive, but so devoid of real CONTENT.

and sex. like, the sex scenes were so short and fleeting, save one or two, that just as I was starting to enjoy them, they'd cut away.

[2happymamas]

:wave

I'm here. :thumb

I am so glad to have the crew here. So happy. :love This is like Queer TTC Part II.

[JenInMpls]

Whoop whoop! party on. *distribute champagne flutes and pour sparking apple cider*

Actually, I should be pouring lemonade, as I've been craving the stuff, which is really weird, I think. Vitamin C, maybe?

And last night, as soon as my son was in bed and my partner was going upstairs to give him his tuck-in, I ran out to buy a bottle of chocolate milk. First real craving! The quart is already gone and I am plotting going to get another one before I pick my kid up at preschool!!!! :o

How are all of you feeling??

[JennM1021]

2HM...so glad you are here!!!! :D

Well...still avoiding the m/s so far...thank god! I mean...I get a tad nauseous here and there...but nothing to complain about. The past few days I've realized though...I cannot complete a meal the way I used to. Nothing really appeals to me to begin with...and I just can't seem to get much down. It doesn't taste good...and I just feel really full. It's a wonder I can eat at all in this zombie-like state I am in! Wow...I honestly can't believe how tired I am! I feel...just kind of out of it. Oh...and the boobs...don't get me started on the boobs!!! Ouch!!! BUT...I am so thankful every day I wake up and feel like crap!! Hopefully that means this little bean is gonna stick!!! :thumb

[Starfish11]

Really just popping in to say that I LOVE the L WORD. I am sad that their last season is coming up :( I thought this past season had plenty o' sex--loved it!

[JennM1021]

Oh...I know!!!! And they're only gonna give us like 8 episodes to close out the series! It's sad that I'm so distraught over a tv show. :o

[Starfish11]

WHAT?! That's ridiculous! I seriously love the show so I don't think you are being "sad" at all. I mean, they could just fill it with more honeylove sex and the viewing public would be fine with it!

I am really interested in the Max storyline. They are seriously exploring gender identity and sexuality with him and I love it!!!!

AND I just know that Alice and Tasha aren't going to make it... :(

[JennM1021]

Oh yeah! They definitely took a very interesting story line twist with Max this past season! I think I was a little annoyed by him at first...but now he has grown to be one of my favorite characters! Maybe I'm just being sentimental because "the end is near"...but I even started to like Jenny toward the end of the season! What's up with that?! :nut I think you're right about Alice and Tasha though...and I LOVE Tasha! :( I do think they need to work Dana back into the final season somehow. I think she "appeared" to Alice at some point after she died didn't she? Maybe they can do something along those lines again...I need to get my Dana fix before it's too late!!

Oh...and Starfish...I'm a B'More mama too!! :D

[2happymamas]

Um, Tasha. :eat:

[JennM1021]

Um, Tasha. :eat:

:yeah:

[JenInMpls]

I swoon at Tasha because my first girlfriend looked a lot like her... except my gf had a very short haircut (read: 1/4" long maybe) and was a little lighter. Pitter patter. But my first gf has now become a man, changed her name to Phoenix and moved to the other end of the country, which I'm still trying to wrap my brain around. :dizzy:

Jenn: liking Jenny?! Wow you MUST be getting sentimental!!! I've found her becoming more and more detestable as the seasons go by. Especially with that little dog in season 4. Puh-leeze!!

What I'd like to see most is Shay coming to live with Shane permanently, and Shane and Paige getting together, buying a house together and being one big happy dyke family. I'm sure it isn't going to happen (I haven't seen season 5 yet so NO SPOILERS PLEASE!!), and frankly, I'm still pissed at Shane though for ditching Carmen who was probably one of my most favorite characters EVER (along with Ivan Aycock!)!

The scene where Dana showed up was when Alice was fuming and refusing to go to Tasha's going away party before she was deployed back to Iraq.

Oh gosh, see, this is why I don't watch much TV - I get obsessed :lol

[JennM1021]

Ok...if you haven't seen Season 5 yet...I won't explain my..."almost" liking Jenny. :o I guess I should say I sympathize with her a bit more. Oh trust me...I HATED her after last season! She was so unbelievably annoying!!! I thought she was really just a meaningless character...and they focus on her a bit in S5...so initially I was even more annoyed. I guess she grew on me though. :o But...yes...CARMEN...my absolute favorite EVER!!!! Do you watch that show Life she is on now? It's not terrible...best of all...she's got the "tough bitch" cop thing going on...so it's worth the hour. :wink

[Starfish11]

I thought Paige was AWESOME! I am hoping that your prediction comes true, although I think they will keep her with the daughter of the chancellor. I know in real life her name is Clementine Ford, but I can't remember what her show name is.

Does anyone else think Shane needs to cut her freakin' hair? She's such a hot woman but her hair drove me nuts all season!

I still think the "prettiest" of them is Helena. Gorgeous! I'm so glad she
came back.

As for Jenny: aye yay yay that one. She was unbearable at the end of Season 4 but she grew on me a bit after Season 5. I LOVED the ALL ABOUT EVE turn that her assistant took! So good!

Jen! So cool! Where are you birthing? Do you have a m/w? I heart Bmore and love meeting people who live in the city!

I'm in Hamilton. We are going to do this at St. Joe's and work with Women's Health Associates and their gaggle of midwives.

[JennM1021]

Yes!! I HATE Shane's hair! For a "hairdresser" by profession...awful. Actually...I don't find her the least bit attractive. I might be in the minority...and my get my lessie card taken away...but just...no...ew. But...Helena...heck yeah!!! Carmen is still my all time favorite...but Tasha and Helena work for me too. :wink

Yeah Starfish...it's exciting to have another local mama in this DDC! :D Long story short...we lived in the Waltherson/Lauraville area (very close to you!) but moved to Glen Burnie about a year ago. We both work in the city...and spend most of our time here...but GB is home for now. I actually am hoping to use Kathy Sloan's practice at Mercy. It's close to home...work...and I've heard really good things about the practice. Although...I did hear that there was a bunch of turnover recently...so I'm a little sketchy about that. Anyway, I know they do water births...and I'm looking into that a lot and getting very excited about the idea. Anyway...it's so awesome to have another B'More area mom on here!!! :D

[Starfish11]

Oh, bummer, you really were right around the corner from us :( BUT you are still close enough :) There's a sale going on in Glen Burnie of gently used baby stuff. It's sponsored by the MD,DC,VA tribe from this forum. Have you heard about it? It's the weekend after Memorial Day.

I have been a long time Sloane and Associates patient as one of the midwives was my gyn. Julie, my midwife, had to leave for family reasons :( I was so distraught. I have an appt with Kathy next week b/c I was going to see how we meshed, but I had a problem a few weeks ago with odd pain and ended up at St. Joe's and then the WMHA. SO, long story short, I will stick with them. I have heard good things about Mercy, too, b/c they have remodeled and focused on their women's services. The only issue I heard about the hospital is parking can be difficult. This isn't a problem for city dwellers ;) but my in-laws from Hilton Head would freak out if they didn't know how or where to park.

I have to admit that I am feeling silly b/c it bothers me that our child will be born in TOWSON and not the city. Seriously, a weird thing to bother me, but I can't help it :lol

[JenInMpls]

I have to admit that I am feeling silly b/c it bothers me that our child will be born in TOWSON and not the city. Seriously, a weird thing to bother me, but I can't help it :lol

I understand that... we live in the city but both of my kids will be born in suburbia - especially the 2nd one... 3rd or 4th ring suburb bleah!

jenn, every time your breasts ache or you find yourself spilling out of your bra, you just think of your old pal Jen in Mpls who would be thrilled to take some of that soreness from you because it means you'll have BOUNTIFUL milk for your little one!!

I felt decent yesterday, but today I feel so lousy. Just when I was starting to have hope for turning the corner! :inthet

[Starfish11]

I love that you understand my "worry" :) Towson is definitely suburban AND...ahem...a bit conservative compared to my chosen home :)

AND if sore boobs=plentiful milk supply I should consider being a wet nurse!

I forgot to say earlier that I think Shane is ok, but is really hot during sex scenes--she always just looks like she is LOVING it ;)

[JennM1021]

Hey Starfish...thanks for the info on the sale in Glen Burnie! I didn't know about that at all. I don't frequent the local tribe much...but I'll go check it out for some info. And, yeah...part of me misses living in the city...then again we're there ALL the time...and we're so close...it's not that big of a deal for us. I get what you mean about birthing in "suburbia" though. Towson is ok though...it could be worse!! I just knew...NO WAY I'm giving birth in AA county. NO WAY!! I think I heard about a birthing center somewhere close by...but I just feel much more comfortable giving birth in the city. I guess for me...it's a comfort zone because I feel more at ease there given my...um...domestic situation. I guess I just feel less judged...like less eyes will be on DP and I when we walk into an appointment together. At least I hope so. I haven't been to Kathy's practice yet, so I guess we'll see how open they are. I have an appt in a couple weeks to meet the ob/gyn director there to get an "all clear" to use the midwifery service. I was shot down initially because I have high blood pressure...but they said there may be some way we can manage it...and I can still use them. So, fingers crossed for that!

[JenInMpls]

Even though I am in suburbia for my mw care and my birth, I loved this one:

nurse: "Are you married or single?"
me: "partnered."
nurse: "And what's her name?"
me: "Jo, J-O." (Since otherwise they always spell it Joe... even though she's a woman and Jo isn't exactly a rare women's name... ???)
nurse: (jot jot jot) "And when was your conception date?"

I loved it. She realized, without missing a step, that there was an obvious chance that I knew exactly when I conceived, given my marital situation.

There also was no confusion about the fact that I conceived by IUI with donor sperm - in fact they didn't really seem to care at all how I got pregnant, which was not the case with my last midwife group, where I repeatedly found myself explaining TO A NURSE MIDWIFE the difference between IUI and IVF - although the nurse did ask if I had any paperwork with the donor's medical history and his blood type on it just for proof so they can wave that in a nurse's face when she wants to give me rhogam at the hospital and I refuse it.

I guess, all in all, I was pretty tickled by how blasé they were about me as a patient, as if it were nothing new or spectacular to have a lesbian mama there. Which happens to be my hope for the world - that we are nothing out of the ordinary. :love

[Starfish11]

That is SO great that you weren't treated "differently" or even as a bit of a spectacle. I dig progress :)

[JenInMpls]

AND if sore boobs=plentiful milk supply I should consider being a wet nurse!

Well, if you weren't in Baltimore, I'd set you up with some glass bottles and have you send all the extra to me, but that's a long trip for the milk. Last time my friend in Madison sent me milk in a cooler by Greyhound - worked great and was always still frozen completely solid when it got here.

I'm hoping that I'll have enough women in town who will be willing to pump for me... :1praying:

[JenInMpls]

beep beep!

How y'all doin'?, as Justin Wilson would say.

miep, I could definitely go for some of those cream cheese wontons today.

I have not yet - knock on wood - felt barfy today. If I am turning the corner, I will be thrilled.

2 weeks til the first 12 weeks have passed.

[JennM1021]

Hey Jen! Glad the barfyness is subsiding a bit. Boobs are still terrible on this end...but I don't want to feed into your boob envy so I won't talk about that. :wink Wow!! You're 2 weeks from the big mark! I'm slowly approaching 7 weeks...so I've still got a bit to go. I do have my ultrasound Monday morning...so :fingersx:.

Mmmm...cheese wontons...:eat:

[Starfish11]

Holy COW cheese wontons sound so good!

So great that you are almost out of the second trimester. Surely you will pop right up and became immediately industrious :)

Still majorly sore boobs here, too, and nausea has kicked in full force (pesky, pesky, pesky!)

[MujerMamaMismo]

We had a meet and greet type thing last night at our birth centre. Usually they do it with up to 5 couples but no one else turned up so we got the midwife all to ourselves! It was actually a really good opportunity and I'm glad no one else attended because it made the whole coming out to the care provider thing so much easier. The midwife asked me if DP was a friend and when I said, 'no, she's my partner' she she didn't skip a beat. It was great.

I really loved the birth centre too. It has 4 birth/family suites with tubs and showers and lounge suites and an enourmous bed...and a large communal space with a great kitchen and living area. I didn't actually get to see a room because 4 babes had just been born and the rooms were all in use but I did notice that one of the new mums was a lesbian so that's pretty cool.

I dreamt of the birth centre all night last night and even though my first choice was a home birth, I'm pretty happy with the BC now.

My first official appointment there is in the first week of June! :D

[Starfish11]

I'm so glad you had a good experience at the birth center :) Sounds like the one-on-one time was perfect.

[JenInMpls]

<artificially cheery voice> good morning!! </artificially cheery voice>

Well, my best beloved, after determining that she wanted so desperately to cuddle with me last night at bedtime, convinced me to try sleeping again in our bed, which inevitably turns into the family bed at some point between 3 and 6 when our son climbs in with us, instead of sleeping in the guest bed, which I have been doing for the past week and getting semi-decent sleep.

And, of course, T climbed in at 4, he and Jo exchanged full-voiced words, as usual, and here it is, 4:52, and I'm nowhere near going back to sleep, Jo fell back asleep within 15 minutes because I would hear her snore and then T say "STOP!" to her snoring. Over and over. She doesn't notice, because she's asleep, and I think that they may both have fallen back asleep now, but I think I'm doomed to the guest bed for the rest of my pregnancy! (And beyond, since I'll sleep with the baby and she'll sleep with T until baby sleeps on a somewhat normal schedule... so probably like 2+ years *snort*)

I came downstairs to eat an apple since I could not stop fantasizing about food (hallmark of my 2nd tri with T, too) to find that it's already getting light in the east at 4:45 AM.

So how are all of you? I hit 12 weeks yesterday and it seems that some of the nausea may be easing just a touch. I won't say that too loudly but I'm hopeful :fingersx:

I had way more than my fair share of cream cheese wontons the other night and while they were tasty, they were not crispy which was a vast disappointment. Oh well :lol

All right, I'm done yacking, I just wanted to know how the rest of you are doing and feeling. I'm off to make a piece of toast and try to go back to sleep... maybe this time my wife will notice when our son gets up and actually get up with him (and my supersonic ears will sleep through him waking)!

ps can you imagine - I have all next week to myself, as wife and kiddo are traveling to see grandma who is having surgery. I have NO IDEA what I'm going to do with myself that whole time.

[Starfish11]

Ugh. I am always infinitely annoyed by Tim's capacity to fall right back asleep. He doesn't snore in his sleep but he MOANS and talks which keeps me awake even longer. It's tough being the "non-sleeper" in the family for sure. :hug We can't get mad at our partners, but in the middle of a sleepless spell it's hard to be rational--at least for me.

Ok, cream cheese wontons sound delicious!

I am at 10w2d and am doing ok. I"m not as tired, which is great. I'm also not quite as nauseated, although that's easy to say on the weekends. My m/s seems to be acutely triggered by th act of taking an early morning shower, followed by me brushing my teeth. When I can putter around more and not get going so early, I always feel much better throughout the day.

I was crampy most of last week, but that's gone away for the most part, too.

A friend of mine is in her second trimester. Last night her DH had to give her an enema b/c she hasn't had a movement since a week ago Wednesday!!! Aye yay yay.

[JenInMpls]

Oh, my gosh, get that woman some fiber. Psyllium husks at every meal! Oatmeal for breakfast! Water water water! (yeah who am I to talk? I ate 1/4 of a leftover quesadilla for breakfast...)

At some unpleasant hour this morning my chirpy son came into the den and started hitting at my leg, and I remember saying to him "go back to mommy and get her to go downstairs with you now, please, or else I will remove you from the room and lock the door." I guess he went because I woke up around 9 to the sound of a tickling session going bad and erupting into self-defensive hitting which garnered him a sit on the floor. A tactic that does not work for this child, but my wife insists on employing it because she swears it works for her with him.

And now they have gone to a trade show for which she had free tickets, and I am left by myself to do who knows what! wow. :D

[JenInMpls]

I heard the heartbeat today :loveeyes: 160s.

[JenInMpls]

*tap tap*

anyone home?

how are you all?

I am longing for a SMALL group of folks due in December who can actually chat back and forth, like my last DDC... alas, MDC has become so popular, that's what happens, I guess...

[2happymamas]

:wave

Hey, Jen (and everyody else).

I have been lurking in the January DDC and Queer TTC thread, just hoping to see another queer mama. No such luck. I was so disappointed that no one from the TTC thread got pregnant this month.

I have been so flipping tired. It is ridiculous. I went to bed at midnight last night and did not get up until 11:25 this morning. I had to go to work from noon until five. Then I got home and slept from 6-7:70. I am so sleeping my life away and have not been to the YMCA since finding out I was pregnant.

How are all my other lovely queer mamas feeling?

[JenInMpls]

2hm, your blog has a great soundtrack, I've been listening to it now for the last 45 minutes or so... :D

Could I get some lessons on being single?

My family is gone for a week. I almost had an anxiety moment this evening as I realized that my personal identity is so tied into my child and my family that I feared for a moment that I no longer had any individuality left. I haven't got an agenda for the next week. There is a concert I want to go to on the 31st. I need to clean the house. I get to sleep a lot without being woken up. But I am at a complete loss for what it is that I used to do when I was single and not dating. OK, granted, there was work during the week. But what did I do on the weekends? Besides laundry?

All of my friends I have are through my son. No, that's not completely true; I have friends from before he was born, but now they have kids too, and it feels like we're friends through our kids, but we're not. And tigermiep is my friend, and she doesn't have a kid YET. :wink And my best friend, to whom I haven't talked in nearly 2 years, won't return my phone calls, and I have no idea why, but it's making me sad, because we have - had - been friends for almost 30 years.

All this angst has nothing to do with having a baby in December. But I felt like unloading. Sorry.

On the preggo front, my nausea comes and goes and is mostly okay if I have food in my belly, the heartburn does the same. I am craving a glass of white wine like no one's business. This kombucha I'm drinking right now, however, must have fermented just enough to have a tiny tickle of alcohol in it, because I suddenly feel way more mellow.

And I'm feeling movement now and then although I am sure my midwife would dismiss it.

I hope you're all doing well and M3 I hope that Bali was REJUVENATING!

[MujerMamaMismo]

I'm back! Bali was good, not great. The first half of the trip was really hard work. I was sick a lot and spent 80% of the first 4 days in bed. By the last couple of days the nausea evened out a bit but I was still pretty useless because the heat made me so tired. Nonetheless, it was great to be in such a beautiful environment with my every desire catered for. I never had to cook or smell food cooking and the friend we stayed with has housekeepers so despite my protests, I didn't even have to wash or iron my clothes or make my bed. That was exactly the kind of luxury I needed. (although I would have liked to indulge in a bit of massage but alas, not in the first trimester - and not in Bali where you're never quite sure what you're gonna get!)

At 11 weeks, my nausea is now pretty low key. I'm still gagging a bit but I haven't vomitted for a week and I haven't had a full day of nausea since Wednesday. These days it seems to come and go in waves and is much less severe.

I've got my first ultrasound in about 10 days. I'm oscillating between serious excitement and sheer terror - most of the time I feel pretty assured that Squeak is perfectly fine but every time I hear a story of an empty sack or a dead foetus I spend half a day freaking out.

Jen - were I you, I'd revel in aloneness. I'd be taking myself to the movies and browsing in bookshops every day. I'd be calling friends I haven't spoken to properly in years and gossiping for hours. I'd let the dishes pile up and I'd stay in bed until 10 every day. And baths! Take long, luxurious bubble baths.
Enjoy!

[2happymamas]

Jen-

So what are you doing to enjoy your alone time? Anything fun? I think it would be hard for me to have something to do for a week now, too. Drugs and strip clubs aren't really my thing anymore. Margaritas would be nice, but not now. :)

MMM-

I am so jealous of you going to Bali. Anything with sleep sounds great. How are you doing now that you are back home?


We had another ultrasound this morning and saw our Lovey. It was so amazing. We have the video of the ultrasound and the heartbeat sounds so loud, healthy, and strong. I :love it! His head is all tucked down, chin to chest. His heart is so strong and visible.

I am thinking of taking a belly shot and putting it up on the sticky. I know there must be other mamas who are not itty bitty. Nothing at all against those who are itty bitty, but I have seen so many people mention that they are bigger and want to wait. Eh, I have such an odd body. I am not especially large, but ALL of my weight centers directly around my stomach. All of it. And it makes me look several months pregnant at all times. Women's bodies are beautiful, IMO, both smaller and bigger. I think I'm gonna show it off.

Put it up or not? Whatcha think.

[JenInMpls]

PLEASE do. I'm so sick of all of the size sixes with flat little bellies with no stretch marks. They make me bitter as a lemon. I will post some belly pics once I actually have a belly to post and not just my fat tum. Because although I have little against my fat tum, it hasn't changed in a pregnant way yet.

I'm taking myself out to eat right now. I have felt like, in my dad's own words, homemade s*** all day and it is getting progressively worse. :inthet

[2happymamas]

I did it! I just posted two belly pics. Heh. I am the biggest in there.

[JenInMpls]

I am so going to scope out yer belleh right now :wink

[MujerMamaMismo]

I did it! I just posted two belly pics. Heh. I am the biggest in there.

Yay you! Have pride in that belly!
I'm no skinny mama but I've lost a bit of weight with this all day sickness so really have nothing to show yet. I WILL post when there's something worth seeing though.

[Starfish11]

PLEASE do. I'm so sick of all of the size sixes with flat little bellies with no stretch marks. They make me bitter as a lemon. I will post some belly pics once I actually have a belly to post and not just my fat tum. Because although I have little against my fat tum, it hasn't changed in a pregnant way yet.

I'm taking myself out to eat right now. I have felt like, in my dad's own words, homemade s*** all day and it is getting progressively worse. :inthet

This cracked me up b/c I don't remember the last time I was a size 6--was I EVER a size six?!

I have "identity" talks with myself all the time. I worry about being co-dependent and then think that my life is about to be swallowed up by a baby. DH and I work really hard to have "separate" interests which I think is healthy, but I mostly miss him when I am doing something without him. Meh.

Ok, Bali sounds awesome! I was in Phoenix all of last week but that's nowhere near as lovely as Bali! I've never been to Bali, but i'm assuming this is so. Like you, I was sick as a dog while traveling! I threw up so vehemently one day that I broke the blood vessels around my eyes :( Do you think the travel exacerbated the symptoms (e.g., nausea, fatigue, sickness)?

I *think* I would love alone time just so I could be miserable without feeling guilty about how my attitude was affecting the people around me.

[JenInMpls]

I am quite certain that, in no time in my personal clothes-buying history, have I ever worn a size 6. I do remember a time (possibly) when I was in early junior high school and may have worn a 7 or a 9. I was wearing a 12 when I got out of high school, Wore a 14 when I was in college, and then my dad died in 99 and everyone brought us cake... I'd be thrilled to work back down to the 14 again but I would even be tickled to be in a 16 again. I was shrinking to that point right after I gave birth to my son (oddly enough), but the combination of way-stretched-out skin and that following winter spent indoors with a wee one plus probably post-partum depression helped me put it aaaaaaaaall back on. And will I be able to lose it after this one? Lord, I don't know. I certainly didn't start out the pregnancy the same way: losing 13 pounds in my first trimester... at my last MW appt I had gained one pound and they were happy with that. I was actually hoping that I had lost but unlike last pregnancy, I am forcing myself to eat.

Anyway.

Can you imagine: my MIL had a second surgery yesterday to remove a tumor from her abdomen. Her first surgery was in the beginning of April and a 15-lb ovarian cyst was removed. This surgery, the doctor removed almost all of a suspected cancerous tumor and it weighed in at 13 lbs. At our wedding in 2001, my MIL weighed around 175. Before surgery yesterday, she weighed 132 and the doc removed 13 of that. DW says that her skin is just hanging off of her. But I can't imagine having nearly 30 lbs of tumors removed from my belly!!

The time to myself has been good but I was very lonely and sad last night at bedtime. Missin' my peeps.

[JenInMpls]

Me again. Dell, yes I think that as relaxing as a vacation can be, it can also be stressful. You're not at home with your regular surroundings, bed, food, even the water is different. Sorry to hear about how sick you've been... has it been lessening at all? I was starting to feel better and now my nausea's getting worse but I haven't vomited so I will count my blessings...

Nothing like a visit to theshapeofamother.com/ (http://theshapeofamother.com/) to regain some refreshing perspective on womens' bodies. I just hopped around there for a while - was delightful to see so many bodies that look like my own... stretch-marked to the nines, saggy, lumpy... just hard to see it as a mark of pride sometimes when what's held up as beautiful are flat, smooth little tummies.

Oh, 2hm, last night I did have a fine time at the local pub eating my fish-n-chips, I had an insanely cute, attentive waiter who would have been happy to refill my iced tea all night if I had wanted to sit there. I gave him a BIG tip. :wink and my sis sent me this text message right after I ordered my food:

have a half pint its good 4 u and the baby!

It made me laugh - I showed it to the waiter and it made him laugh - and I did have a half pint and yowza was it tasty, but obviously I have not turned into a lightweight, I felt absolutely no effect from drinking it! So I guess it was the perfect size.

When I ordered my food he asked me if I wanted an adult beverage since I was celebrating my solitude and freedom from small child, and I said boy howdy do I ever, but I'm trying to behave because I'm pregnant. Still, we've got big plans for after-the-baby: babysitter for T, Sunday afternoon at the pub, a half pint for me and 6 Nations Rugby on the big screen, go Wales! I'll need to get a red sling so that the little one can have team spirit too :wink

[Starfish11]

That is a way cool site! Thanks for posting it :)

Um, I feel better somedays. I've gone from having intense nausea a few times a day to having medium nausea most of the day. And it's a rare day that I don't throw up at least twice (four is my max so far, though, thank goodness). I had my acupuncture appt last night and she was shocked that I wasn't more upset with being sick, but I honestly expected to be based on other people's experiences AND there will be a baby at the end of all of this so that makes me happy. She suggested coconut water that Whole Foods sells. We'll see if I can stomach the yuppiness of the store as well as their overindulgent prices. I love going to her b/c I find her so comforting and wise. Plus she just really takes her time talking to me and giving (welcomed) advice. She said that later on in the pregnancy she'll be able to hear the baby's heartbeat piggybacking on my when she does my pulses--so cool!

Rugby, eh? Did you play? Is your ds into it already to? We are a big soccer fans in our house. I told DH I was pregnant by presenting him with onesie that had the emblem of his favorite futbol team on it (AC Milan).

Are you a LOST fan? Last night's finale was SO FREAKIN GOOD! Of course I stayed up way too late and am now so tired...

We had a weird night anyway. We have four dogs and two cats but they aren't big players in the nighttime drama. At 3:30 one of our dogs started seizing. Two of our dogs are seizure dogs so it's not a huge deal for us to deal with it, but it's not fun. This was our BIG GUY and he's harder to manage during it all. Our old, old dog in the middle of it all went to the corner of the bedroom and just started peeing! :angry He's so good about letting us know he has to go out and he gave no indication. Aye yay yay. It took 45 minutes to get everyone settled, then the dog that had seized whined and whined until he got into bed with us whereupon he laid across DH and I. I was too tired to protest. I finally got back to sleep at 4 AM. I get up at 5:45 normally but that didn't happen this morning.

Um...apparently I had a lot to say this post :lol

[2happymamas]

Hello!

Jen, I saw your post in Queer TTC and have to agree. I miss that thread so much. It is still the first thread I check after logging on here. I have to say that I miss the sense of understanding and closeness. And I miss wishing everyone fingersex. And I also wanted to say that I am really upset! I went to the thread about sharing spotlight weeks, saw that MMM was willing to share, and started to reply. Yeah, about five minutes after you replied. Ugh. :wink (I am not really upset, in case the wink did not give me away as teasing).


How are you doing, MMM? Your first appointment at the BC is this week, isn't it?

What happened to Tiger and Simcon?

[JenInMpls]

well, why don't you share with mmm and me and we'll just have big happy queer mama week? :lol

I hung out with tigermiep on Friday and got to OGLE ULTRASOUND PICTURES OF HER ADORABLE BABY. :jumpers: She's got a cute little belly, and is going to hopefully adopt my ridiculous maternity jeans I bought on eBay that turned out to have silver stitching all over the butt. She is obviously more of a sparkly-butt gal than I am. tee hee :wink

My family came back yesterday, and I am very glad to have them back, but am not happy to be sharing the bed again with Ms. Snoring-while-taking-up-2/3-of-the-bed. :angry I think I woke up about 5 times in the night last night and was up for breakfast at 5:35. uuuuuuuuuuuuuugh. At least my son slept til 7, in his own bed the whole night (woo hoo!). I swear I'm going to bed when he does tonight. :zzz

Off to go pick up a little before they come home with Papa John's. Lived on that stuff with my first pregnancy... just couldn't stomach the local non-chain favorite option this evening.

Crazy for smilies tonight. :bgbounce

Hogs and quiches, j

ETA: I must be griping? All of the google ads are for gripe water. :lol

[MujerMamaMismo]

yeah 2hm - let's have a big 'ole queer mama spotlight week! I'll go suggest it in a minute :D

and yes! I made it to 12 weeks! woohoo. My first midwife appt and my first scan are scheduled for tomorrow. I have to miss half a day of work and I'm thrilled! I'm going to be so much happier once I've seen a little being bouncing around in my belly.

incidently jen - I LOVE that you always notice the go.ogle ads. I never even see them and early when you used to mention it, I thought you must have had a different page to me! :lol

ETA: 2hm - if you make a request first, then I will go and support it. It might look weird if I just outright state that we want you in our week even though you've expressed no interest. :lol

[JenInMpls]

Dell, I forgot to say - although I meant to say - that I'm sorry for your middle-of-the-night craziness with your furbabies. I suppose it's good preparation for being up in the night with a little one... although at least your baby (probably) won't pee in the middle of the floor.

And no, I have never played rugby. Jo and I discovered it totally by accident this year, she downloaded a game off of a British TV site and we were fascinated by how it is actually such a cleanly played game. And the rules. are. neverending. There is so little attitude like there is in American Football, and so much more athleticism. So fun to watch.

We even found our boy's name watching rugby... :o shhhh! (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ronan_O%27Gara)

ok, off to pick up the big brother from preschool... who, btw, refers to the child-in-da-belly as "my baby". As in HIS baby. too cute!!

MMM, how was your appt today?

[MujerMamaMismo]

:D
I've been walking on air all afternoon folks! My midwife appointment was so wonderful. I'm so thrilled with how inclusive she was of DP - in fact, in the end she started asking DP all the questions because I had an attack of pregnancy brain. Because our system here works so differently to the US and we are using public health, we don't have a choice of midwife - we just see whoever is on the roster at the birth centre on the day you attend. We soooooo lucked out - this woman is a stated, active feminist and she's so queer friendly. I'm ecstatic. So far we've met 2 of the 4 midwives and I would be privileged to have either of them deliver my baby!

And then (just by coincidence) I had my ultrasound today too...I saw my baby, perfectly formed with all the appropriate limbs and appendages - with a strong, healthy heartbeat and no detected foetal abnormalities (probability 1:4730). It was so wonderful and I feel soooooo much happier and less anxious now.

Even throwing up all day hasn't killed this buzz!! :jumpers:

[2happymamas]

:!wback:


I wanted to bump this so I remember to post an update when I get home from grocery shopping early this evening. Quick, mini-update......things are really good. I :love this babe!

Like the welcome back sign?

Everyone else?

[avivaelona]

This is like the only thread on this DDC where people are just chatting. Can I be an honorary lesbian? I have some qualifications (I wouldn't kick Grace Jones out of my bed). Plus I used to live in Baltimore too. Plus I just like chatting.

[JenInMpls]

personally, I don't mind one bit. I understand the desire to have a small group that just has a few things in common that hold us together, and then just gabbing. I miss that - horribly! - because i was so spoiled with my Sept 04 DDC. I'm still in touch with some of those women, one of them donated her milk to me for my son for the first 3 months of his life, i went to her blessingway for kid #2, another came and visited me from Florida!, etc, etc.

And I don't have to start a whole new thread in the DDC to discuss my low back pain and have 75 women reply "me too!", and then it dies. That's just not what I'm looking for...

But seriously, yeah, I did just spend the last 4 days visiting my sister and i have a backache that is killing me. My chiro treatment last Friday seems to have had no effect. I guess I need to get back to yoga, but not this week, because one evening we're having dinner with friends we haven't seen in 2 years, Tues evening, all day Weds, Thurs and Fri and Sat morning I'm at a conference while T goes to preschool for 3 full days which he's never done before, I've got a MW appt Tues morning (which my partner can hopefully finally come to), and lest I believe I can collapse into a heap on Saturday after the conference is over, I've got to clean the house so that it looks decent for when a friend of mine from Germany comes to visit on Monday.

:zzz

BUT in :thumb news, today I am serving as a "model" for a class on prenatal massage and shiatsu at a local massage school :bgbounce 1 hour of massage - free! mmmmmmmmmmm.

17 weeks along and still feeling moderately barfy... this could end, any time...

[IrelandsMama]

Hi ladies, I never know if I should include myself or not, since I'm married to a male, but I'm sure some of you can understand that doesn't exclude me from being queer. I also lead a totally straight lifestyle and don't even seem to know any ladies like myself anymore. Anyways I miss the understand that you can be leant only ladies like yourselves.

I'm 23, I have one high spirited, funny, sweet, and adorable toddler who is 19 months, and I'm married. I am a total birth junkie and a doula. I love women, I love birth, and I love love love the power and love that only women seem to demonstrate. I'm addicted to being part of the picture.

Anyways, I decided to post mostly because my sister who is 19 seems to be in her first relationship with a female friend of ours. It's strange for me since I find myself being excited about the little things I see. It reminds me of old relationships I've had and makes me miss that female bond. I've asked my sister if what I think is going on is going on, and she says nah, but I see them light up for each other and I know she's just wrong, she will find out soon enough. Plus it's just not that easy to accept for some people. Young love, funny stuff.

Well just thought I would kind of vent a little..... every now and then I get a little sad and yearn for what I used to have. It's not that I want a divorce or to have other partners, it' more that I know it's a relationship I'll most likely never have again, and am a wee bit jealous that others do. Silly huh?

take care much love ladies,

Sav

[avivaelona]

thanks Jen! Though maybe I should just start a "kitchen table" chat thread instead, I can totally understand wanting a place to talk about issues that really apply only to certain situations and unless Grace suddenly stomps into my life, I know that isn't going to apply to me.

Meanwhile though, how was the massage?, and did you friend find you with a clean house or not ;) ?

Funny Sav, I miss the female bonds I've had in the past too lately. Not romantic relationships but I've had closer female friends in the past and I would love some more close female friendships. A close "mommy friendship" I had dissolved last year, and since then everyone I've met has stayed on the acquaintance level. I'm sure its not the same thing, but I do know what you mean about missing a certain balance of relationships.

[simcon]

JeninMpls, I'm sooo jealous of your massage! I think I might have to get myself one of those. I've been laying low--not on email much, as I'm in the middle of three back-to-back and intense business trips, and exhausted.

Glad to see everything's going well with everyone--I'm all about welcoming our lovely allies here too, and queer-but-kinda-straight-appearing folk.

More when I come up again for air!

Btw, just hit 14 weeks and all is well--we had an NT scan last week with great results, and saw our little cutie with his/her tiny nose and pursed lips on the u/s.

[MujerMamaMismo]

JeninMpls, I'm sooo jealous of your massage! I think I might have to get myself one of those. I've been laying low--not on email much, as I'm in the middle of three back-to-back and intense business trips, and exhausted.

Glad to see everything's going well with everyone--I'm all about welcoming our lovely allies here too, and queer-but-kinda-straight-appearing folk.

More when I come up again for air!

Btw, just hit 14 weeks and all is well--we had an NT scan last week with great results, and saw our little cutie with his/her tiny nose and pursed lips on the u/s.

Awww boy - I don't know how you do 3 work trips - I've just come back from one and I'm completely wrecked...and I was only gone for 36 hours!

:D congrats on making it through the scary bit. you must be so relieved. :thumb

DP and I celebrated our 7 year anniversary on Sunday - I can honestly say that we couldn't be happier with each other and where we are in our lives. We are so very lucky. :love

And welcome to everyone - straight but not narrow folk are certainly welcome in my book!

[2happymamas]

But seriously, yeah, I did just spend the last 4 days visiting my sister and i have a backache that is killing me. My chiro treatment last Friday seems to have had no effect. I guess I need to get back to yoga, but not this week, because one evening we're having dinner with friends we haven't seen in 2 years, Tues evening, all day Weds, Thurs and Fri and Sat morning I'm at a conference while T goes to preschool for 3 full days which he's never done before, I've got a MW appt Tues morning (which my partner can hopefully finally come to), and lest I believe I can collapse into a heap on Saturday after the conference is over, I've got to clean the house so that it looks decent for when a friend of mine from Germany comes to visit on Monday.

BUT in :thumb news, today I am serving as a "model" for a class on prenatal massage and shiatsu at a local massage school :bgbounce 1 hour of massage - free! mmmmmmmmmmm.

17 weeks along and still feeling moderately barfy... this could end, any time...

Any word yet on when you are starting yoga? DW just asked me this past weekend when I wanted her to budget in money in our monthly expenses for yoga classes. I wish a bunch of us lived closer and could do the yoga classes together.

I am so jealous of your massage. How was it? Still feeling barfy is horrible. Just horrible. Has it let up any this week?

JeninMpls, I'm sooo jealous of your massage! I think I might have to get myself one of those. I've been laying low--not on email much, as I'm in the middle of three back-to-back and intense business trips, and exhausted.

Glad to see everything's going well with everyone--I'm all about welcoming our lovely allies here too, and queer-but-kinda-straight-appearing folk.

More when I come up again for air!

Btw, just hit 14 weeks and all is well--we had an NT scan last week with great results, and saw our little cutie with his/her tiny nose and pursed lips on the u/s.

Congrats on seeing your beautiful baby's lips and nose. I bet they were so darn cute. How are you doing intense trips for work? I can't begin to imagine how exhausted you must be.




DP and I celebrated our 7 year anniversary on Sunday - I can honestly say that we couldn't be happier with each other and where we are in our lives. We are so very lucky. :love


Congrats to you and DP. Seven years, huh? That is quite the accomplishment. Did you two do anything special on your anniversary?

Ireland and Avivaelona:

Welcome to the thread.

Me:

The fatigue is getting better. I still like to take a nap everyday, but scheduling a two hour nap into my day is no longer mandatory. I am starting to feel better. However, I did break down in sobs last Thursday because I wanted a cigarette. Nice, huh? :eyesroll

We are getting ready to take DW's two brothers (they are 2 and 4...she was an only child until the month before she turned 32) camping over July 4th weekend. We are really, really excited.

Things are going great! :D

Shhh....Secret Time: I finally hit the 12 week mark this past Saturday. I giggled the day someone posted a thread about us all being in the second trimester because I know my EDD is 01/03/2009. I just wanted to be with all of you. Either way, I passed that critical point. Phew! It would not have been pretty if I lost another baby. Not pretty at all.

[JenInMpls]

Any word yet on when you are starting yoga? DW just asked me this past weekend when I wanted her to budget in money in our monthly expenses for yoga classes. I wish a bunch of us lived closer and could do the yoga classes together.

I am so jealous of your massage. How was it? Still feeling barfy is horrible. Just horrible. Has it let up any this week?

Well, the yoga studio I go to has a fairly mellow attitude... you can sign up in advance, or you can drop in. They are small, with one studio, and focus primarily on pre- and post-natal and baby yoga. They have yoga for non-pregnant women and mommies, though, too. :) my sister bought me 3 months of yoga for my birthday, and so I purchased the sessions ahead-of-time - I bought 12 sessions and I've been to 4. Hopefully I can get back at it next week which is looking way less busy.

I am, however, very much looking forward to this conference I'll be at this week. Hoping to get to hang out with many of my former colleagues who will hopefully be there. It's in town, too, which is a lovely serendipity - usually you have to travel halfway across the country to make the conferences because they move from school to school. My son's actually looking forward to his 3 full days at preschool and the fact that he gets to bring a pillow and stuffed animal for naptime.

The massage was freakin' delicious. :yum I can't describe it any other way. The therapists were all trained therapists who were just getting hours for relicensure or learning prenatal shiatsu. I got a very cool therapist who was very responsive and attentive and once she found out I had a female partner she asked some fun questions like "so did you and your partner have to decide which one of you would carry the baby?" - they were the kind of questions I like, out of genuine, open curiosity. And her hands were SO WARM. mmmmmmmmm. I might actually call the school and see if I can get an appointment for another one since they charge only $35 an hour. It helped my back out, too. So I heartily recommend to all of you to see if there are any massage schools in your area and whether they're doing prenatal classes and need volunteer models for the students to practice on!!

2hm yaaaaaaaaaaaay!!!!

[2happymamas]

Check out the siggie....I linked pics of K and I! Five years later and I still think she's the hottest thing ever....

[avivaelona]

You are so cute! Your user name totally fits. Your wife has a very beautiful and kind looking face.

Jen I'm so jealous of the massage and the impending adult conversation I can't even talk to you.

I put up a belly pic on the belly pic thread, but I'm clothed and headless, not very interesting, I just put it up for future comparison.

[ommom]

i'm due in january & feel pretty straight these days (& for the past few yrs) but definitely identified as queer for quite a span of time earlier in life. just wanted to say hi and YAY and glad y'all are here. xo,

[JenInMpls]

Most of you probably gleaned this from the queer & pregnant thread already, but we had our US today: :storkboy

My son's a bit disappointed, as he wanted a baby sister; I'm a touch disappointed, both for him and because I was convinced it was a girl, too! But I'm still happy about the good scan we had today!

[avivaelona]

yay Jen...dissappointment is ok, it will pass

[MujerMamaMismo]

Most of you probably gleaned this from the queer & pregnant thread already, but we had our US today: :storkboy

My son's a bit disappointed, as he wanted a baby sister; I'm a touch disappointed, both for him and because I was convinced it was a girl, too! But I'm still happy about the good scan we had today!

I'm sorry Jen, I didn't acknowledge your disappointment in the queer & preg thread...I think partially because I'm terrified of my own disappointment if the US discovers a boy for me. I'm sure I'll be thrilled to have a happy healthy baby but I do have a girl preference and after a really intense dream where I reacted almost violently upon learning it was a boy, I'm a bit scared.

Anyway - there I go making this about me, when all I wanted to do was give you a hug and lend you an ear. :treehugger: