Modest Dressing Mommas

[modest momma]

Anyone her besides me who dresses modestly? I have been for the better part of two years now. I have one pair of maternity pants everything else is dresses or skirts. My husband was reluctant at first but, now like that there are things just for him to see.

[modest momma]

really nobody?

[boigrrrlwonder]

I'm not sure I understand what you mean by modest. It sounds like from your first post that you consider pants to be immodest.

[zinemama]

Yes, some clarification, please. I consider myself a modest dresser, but I wear pants all the time.

[magstphil]

I, too, would like clarification. I am a modest dresser per my religion but my form of modesty might not be yours or a Muslim mama or a Amish mama, ykwim?

I am LDS (Mormon) and we are asked not to wear sleeveless, tight, or otherwise revealing clothes. Also, our shorts/skirts need to go to the knee.

At first I hated the idea of having to be modest, especially in the desert where I live, but now I love it! I have so much more respect for my body (this is my personal experience. I'm not looking down my nose at anyone) Treating my body as sacred (in my way) has really uplifted me. :throb

[Verity]

I probably don't dress as modestly as this thread contemplates, but I don't wear tank tops or tops with spaghetti straps because I don't think they're flattering on me (or on most people :duck:), and I don't show cleavage because I just feel uncomfortable with anything low-cut. The idea of drawing attention to one's chest just strikes me as odd, unless it's in the privacy of the bedroom.

I don't wear short (above the knee) skirts or shorts, mostly because of spider veins. I don't miss the shorts, and probably wouldn't wear those anyway because of my age. (I think most people just don't look good in short shorts once they pass a certain age). I do miss skirts, though.

I don't understand or like current fashions that seem to be all about showing off as much skin as possible, and wearing things that look like underwear. I'm not at all religious, but I just don't see how it's empowering to women to walk around half-naked while men wear clothes that reasonably cover their bodies.

[modest momma]

Modest in different to everyone and every body shape. I don't wear anything really low cut because I have a big bust. I don't wear pants because I get lazy and start looking like a man with my husbands t-shirts. Pants can be modest if you can't see your panty line.

[Katzchen]

Well, I consider myself pretty modest. Nothing low cut or without sleeves. I also don't wear shorts or skirts shorter than mid calf. Nothing tight on top or on bottom.

I prefer skirts but have been wearing pants a lot lately since they are more modest for me at the moment since my two year old has the bad habit of lifting up or crawling under my skirts :)

[modest momma]

Well, I consider myself pretty modest. Nothing low cut or without sleeves. I also don't wear shorts or skirts shorter than mid calf. Nothing tight on top or on bottom.

I prefer skirts but have been wearing pants a lot lately since they are more modest for me at the moment since my two year old has the bad habit of lifting up or crawling under my skirts :) I like long shorts but I have such short legs they look funny. I have a four year old that tries to climb under my skirts. When I see her coming at me I just hold my sides. Most of skirts are really long now, so it's only an occasional thing when she tries to hide...LOL

[modest momma]

I, too, would like clarification. I am a modest dresser per my religion but my form of modesty might not be yours or a Muslim mama or a Amish mama, ykwim?

I am LDS (Mormon) and we are asked not to wear sleeveless, tight, or otherwise revealing clothes. Also, our shorts/skirts need to go to the knee.

At first I hated the idea of having to be modest, especially in the desert where I live, but now I love it! I have so much more respect for my body (this is my personal experience. I'm not looking down my nose at anyone) Treating my body as sacred (in my way) has really uplifted me. :throb Dresses modest has changed me tremendously. It is not ordered at mu church it is something that once I learned more about I felt convicted about. I also noticed at one point before that men at church and other places were boob gazing a little too much. This offended me in many ways.

[neveryoumindthere]

Another modest mama here :)
I cover everything except hands and face, with a scarf and long loose overgarment.
At home I wear whatever (tight, sleeveless, jeans etc) and with my girlfriends, usually jeans and a long top, no cleavage or back showing or low rise pants without a top to cover.

[modest momma]

Another modest mama here :)
I cover everything except hands and face, with a scarf and long loose overgarment.
At home I wear whatever (tight, sleeveless, jeans etc) and with my girlfriends, usually jeans and a long top, no cleavage or back showing or low rise pants without a top to cover.
It does get really hot here and so I will wear sleeveless. It can get up and around 120 degrees! What kind of overgarment do you wear?

[MommyAnne]

I am beginning a more modest journey. I just had my fourth child, my little Charlotte, and during my pregnancy with her I felt the need to be really covered. I thought it was just the pregnancy, but it has continued, and now I wear sleeves at least to my elbow, and layers. It's already hot here, but it's probably better because I sunburn so easily. I wear some jeans, but I am transitioning to calf length skirts, and will probably, eventually, only wear those. For some reason, I would love to cover my hair, but no one really does around here, so I haven't done so yet, it'll take more courage on my part.

I think it's a matter of comfort, spiritual comfort, for me. It's me defining who am I on the inside to the outside. Also, I like the idea of my husband being the only one to see me. It's my body, I guess, I'll show off as much or as little as I'd like. I DO NOT think that showing skin is wrong, not at all, I just feel so uncomfortable when I do that it has gotten to the point of not being worth the discomfort.

Glad to know you Anita Ann!

[modest momma]

I am beginning a more modest journey. I just had my fourth child, my little Charlotte, and during my pregnancy with her I felt the need to be really covered. I thought it was just the pregnancy, but it has continued, and now I wear sleeves at least to my elbow, and layers. It's already hot here, but it's probably better because I sunburn so easily. I wear some jeans, but I am transitioning to calf length skirts, and will probably, eventually, only wear those. For some reason, I would love to cover my hair, but no one really does around here, so I haven't done so yet, it'll take more courage on my part.

I think it's a matter of comfort, spiritual comfort, for me. It's me defining who am I on the inside to the outside. Also, I like the idea of my husband being the only one to see me. It's my body, I guess, I'll show off as much or as little as I'd like. I DO NOT think that showing skin is wrong, not at all, I just feel so uncomfortable when I do that it has gotten to the point of not being worth the discomfort.

Glad to know you Anita Ann! Well, hello Linsey!! I cover my hair and let's just say I only know one person who does it in real life around here. She just started covering. For almost two years I am the only person I knew in these parts who cover...well besides a few people going through chemo. Most of shirts are 3/4 sleeves but, I have a few shorter sleeves I wear. This journey all around has made my husband and I closer. He likes how my body and hair is just for him. In saying that this was not his idea nor did he order it.

[neveryoumindthere]

It does get really hot here and so I will wear sleeveless. It can get up and around 120 degrees! What kind of overgarment do you wear?

It gets hot here too, but like they do in the desert I'm guessing the extra layers keep us from sweating to death :)

I wear overgarments called Jilbab or Abaya similar to the ones here (http://jelbab.com/Abaya.asp). The abayas are much thinner material and feel awesome when the wind blows through the sleeves on a hot day.lol

BUT I only wear solid colours with no other patterns because *for me* that is part of my modest dress. (In summer, I wear lighter coloured abayas.) Also, I never tuck my hijab in, I leave it out (they are long, to my waist) so that it completely covers my chest area. Underneath, in the summer I'm in tank tops, and pants and thinner socks with breathable shoes. It's hot but not unbearable in any way. I LOOOOVE the sun, it makes me happy! :D

HTH!

[thefragile7393]

I wear overgarments called Jilbab or Abaya similar to the ones here (http://jelbab.com/Abaya.asp). The abayas are much thinner material and feel awesome when the wind blows through the sleeves on a hot day.lol


Wow those are so beautiful! I admit I wouldn't mind wearing one....and I'm not of the Muslim faith. :o

[modest momma]

It gets hot here too, but like they do in the desert I'm guessing the extra layers keep us from sweating to death :)

I wear overgarments called Jilbab or Abaya similar to the ones here (http://jelbab.com/Abaya.asp). The abayas are much thinner material and feel awesome when the wind blows through the sleeves on a hot day.lol

BUT I only wear solid colours with no other patterns because *for me* that is part of my modest dress. (In summer, I wear lighter coloured abayas.) Also, I never tuck my hijab in, I leave it out (they are long, to my waist) so that it completely covers my chest area. Underneath, in the summer I'm in tank tops, and pants and thinner socks with breathable shoes. It's hot but not unbearable in any way. I LOOOOVE the sun, it makes me happy! :D

HTH!
Those are great. I wonder if I would offend anyone wearing something like that? I am Christian but like to be covered and comfy.

[bjorker]

I probably don't dress as modestly as this thread contemplates, but I don't wear tank tops or tops with spaghetti straps because I don't think they're flattering on me (or on most people :duck:), and I don't show cleavage because I just feel uncomfortable with anything low-cut. The idea of drawing attention to one's chest just strikes me as odd, unless it's in the privacy of the bedroom.

I don't wear short (above the knee) skirts or shorts, mostly because of spider veins. I don't miss the shorts, and probably wouldn't wear those anyway because of my age. (I think most people just don't look good in short shorts once they pass a certain age). I do miss skirts, though.

I don't understand or like current fashions that seem to be all about showing off as much skin as possible, and wearing things that look like underwear. I'm not at all religious, but I just don't see how it's empowering to women to walk around half-naked while men wear clothes that reasonably cover their bodies.

Yes, I would consider myself modest in this sort of way, and agree with most of what you've said here. I'm far from a prude, but I have no interest in that type of "fashion", or whatever... but most of it is just my personal comfort level. I try not to concern myself with what other people are wearing, though, but sometimes I do find myself wondering what the heck people are thinking. :p I don't think people should stop wearing things they like just because they're getting older, though. I do wish people were more comfortable with showing their so-called "imperfect" parts, and were more proud of their bodies the way that they are. But it's all about comfort level, and I know that I personally don't want people looking at me, unless I know and trust them already... really, really, really well.

Anyway, I never wear dresses or skirts. Ever. I used to occasionally, but I realised that I wasn't comfortable in that, either. It just doesn't feel right to me, so I stick to pants. My point is thought that I'm not at ALL traditional, which is what I think the OP might be referring to? I mostly wear boys clothes. heh.

I think it's very important to just wear what you're comfortable in, whatever that means to you!

[modest momma]

Yes, I would consider myself modest in this sort of way, and agree with most of what you've said here. I'm far from a prude, but I have no interest in that type of "fashion", or whatever... but most of it is just my personal comfort level. I try not to concern myself with what other people are wearing, though, but sometimes I do find myself wondering what the heck people are thinking. :p I don't think people should stop wearing things they like just because they're getting older, though. I do wish people were more comfortable with showing their so-called "imperfect" parts, and were more proud of their bodies the way that they are. But it's all about comfort level, and I know that I personally don't want people looking at me, unless I know and trust them already... really, really, really well.

Anyway, I never wear dresses or skirts. Ever. I used to occasionally, but I realised that I wasn't comfortable in that, either. It just doesn't feel right to me, so I stick to pants. My point is thought that I'm not at ALL traditional, which is what I think the OP might be referring to? I mostly wear boys clothes. heh.

I think it's very important to just wear what you're comfortable in, whatever that means to you!

Like I said before modesty is all in the eye of the beholder. I am more traditionally modest.

[JessicaRenee]

I dress modestly! :D

[modest momma]

I dress modestly! :D Welcome Jessica!

[JessicaRenee]

Thanks! :D

Luckily I don't have to worry about heat. If it's under 75 degrees out, I'll wear three sweaters and still be shivering. Where I live it's about 65 on average year-round. Dressing modestly is very easy for me. :p

[neveryoumindthere]

Those are great. I wonder if I would offend anyone wearing something like that? I am Christian but like to be covered and comfy.

Go for it! I can't even imagine any Muslim mama being offended by it. *shrugs*

[Tithonia]

Wow, this thread caught my eye right away! I've always been most comfortable dressing modestly (long skirts, pants, or sometimes long shorts in summer, loose tops), and did I ever stick out in high school! :D I've always felt it empowering to dress modestly. My body is my own, and I am not going to allow any cultural pressure to tell me I have to dress as an object for male eyes (I know not everyone feels that way about the way they dress, but it always felt that way to me). Dressing modestly means dressing the way I want to.

Now that I have a little daughter I feel even more that dressing modestly is part of my statement against the sexualization of women, especially young girls. Although I don't think about it much anymore; it's just who I am by now, I guess.

So a big hello to all of you who are into modesty in one way or another!

[modest momma]

Go for it! I can't even imagine any Muslim mama being offended by it. *shrugs* IO just thought I'd ask. Ya know?

[modest momma]

Wow, this thread caught my eye right away! I've always been most comfortable dressing modestly (long skirts, pants, or sometimes long shorts in summer, loose tops), and did I ever stick out in high school! :D I've always felt it empowering to dress modestly. My body is my own, and I am not going to allow any cultural pressure to tell me I have to dress as an object for male eyes (I know not everyone feels that way about the way they dress, but it always felt that way to me). Dressing modestly means dressing the way I want to.

Now that I have a little daughter I feel even more that dressing modestly is part of my statement against the sexualization of women, especially young girls. Although I don't think about it much anymore; it's just who I am by now, I guess.

So a big hello to all of you who are into modesty in one way or another!
Well hello!!! Yes, I have a daughter and am especially careful since then. I have not always dressed modestly there was a spell in my 20's when I thought I'd be sexy LOL! Not a high point in my life.:thumb

[Mama Aminah]

Go for it! I can't even imagine any Muslim mama being offended by it. *shrugs*

I agree. I can't see any Muslim being offended by it. Just don't be surprised if you see a Muslim and get greeted with a "Salam". :lol

[Mama Aminah]

I also dress modestly. After becoming a Muslim, it was a slow conversion from wearing short sleeves to head covering and overgarment. I absolutely love it and feel very empowered by it. :)

[modest momma]

I agree. I can't see any Muslim being offended by it. Just don't be surprised if you see a Muslim and get greeted with a "Salam". :lol

Hey, a nice greeting is always great!:thumb

[Mommy2anangel]

Modest mama here. I'm a Christian and I feel convicted to dress modestly. No sleeveless, cleavage showing shirts. I mostly wear skirts longer than my knees. At home only, around DH and my 2 year old would I dress in sweats and maybe tank tops (jammies). Not much of a jeans/pants type person.

[modest momma]

Modest mama here. I'm a Christian and I feel convicted to dress modestly. No sleeveless, cleavage showing shirts. I mostly wear skirts longer than my knees. At home only, around DH and my 2 year old would I dress in sweats and maybe tank tops (jammies). Not much of a jeans/pants type person.

Welcome. I do occasionally wear sweats. You know hen you have those days and you're inside all day? Tank tops I wear inside as well because let's face it, when it's hot it's hot. Where is your fave type of skirt?

[meowee]

I consider myself a modest dresser but I rarely wear skirts or dresses. I prefer pants with a long top. I buy maternity and plus sized tops for the longer coverage. For me showing my shoulders in public is a "big deal."

[neveryoumindthere]

slightly off topic, but do you dress sexy/less-covered when it's just you and DH or just at home or is covering something you do always?

A friend of mine who is Christian says that she covers when she is "prayerful" and since she's always supposed to be in that state, she even (mostof the time) covers her hair at home too..
Me, on the other hand, anything goes at home ;)(well, not the really revealing stuff around my kids)

[meowee]

I wear less indoors but not a whole lot less. I have a just below knee skirt I sometimes wear indoors, but not outdoors, and I often wear tank tops in the house, but don't outside unless it's broiling hot. Even then I avoid it/ .

I really don't know my reasons... I don't like attracting attention and I feel if I dressed the way a lot of women do (tight jeans, revealing tops, heels) I'd get attention I don't want.

[modest momma]

I cover except while in the shower and in bed. But, you know sometimes I will dress a bit sexier for the hubby. Nothing wrong with that, sexy is even in the Bible.:treehugger:

[magstphil]

It does get really hot here and so I will wear sleeveless. It can get up and around 120 degrees!
I hear ya, mama! It has been known to push 130 here :dizzy:

Thanks! :D

Luckily I don't have to worry about heat. If it's under 75 degrees out, I'll wear three sweaters and still be shivering. Where I live it's about 65 on average year-round. Dressing modestly is very easy for me. :p
Lucky! *pouts*
And hey, Jessica! :love

I also dress modestly. After becoming a Muslim, it was a slow conversion from wearing short sleeves to head covering and overgarment. I absolutely love it and feel very empowered by it. :)
This is probaly way OT but the Muslim mamas here have been talking about their "overgarment" and a light went off in my head. Some LDS wear an undergarment that is sacred to us and I find it so interesting how we all of all faiths and walk of life have such similarities. :grouphug

Totally random, I know! Sorry. :o

slightly off topic, but do you dress sexy/less-covered when it's just you and DH or just at home or is covering something you do always?
This is another thing I love about dressing modestly- it reserves so much of me just for DH! :innocent I dress modestly all the time (excluding the shower and swimming although I would like a much more modest swimsuit than I have. I went from hating one pieces as being too frumpy and now feel they show waaaaay too much!) except for DH. But that's between us. :W


I seem to remember someone talking about daughters and modesty here. When do you think we should start dressing our daughters modestly? I have 3 little girls and I have a hard time with this. We live in the hot hot desert and it seems so harsh to cover them in such extreme heat. For my oldest (4) who can regulate her temp a bit better I think cap sleeve and shorts to the knee are ok but my two babies (1 and 2) I worry about. Thoughts?

[sunkissedmumma67]

I'm considering dressing more modestly, i've never dressed sleazy, but i have always thought that it was ok to dress a little sexy. I wear alot of spagetti strap t's, alot of my shirts show some cleavage, but i'am beginning to have different opinions on it! Though where i live theres not alot of modest dressing going on, (Cali) especially with young and middle aged women!

[Mommy2anangel]

Welcome. I do occasionally wear sweats. You know hen you have those days and you're inside all day? Tank tops I wear inside as well because let's face it, when it's hot it's hot. Where is your fave type of skirt?

I love jeans skirts and gypsy, bohemian type skirts (especially when it's super hot :lol )
What about you mama??

[tricia80]

I dress modestly.. i am a recent christian (mennonite) convert.. so i dress in cape dresses and wear a head covering even at home... My dd wears dresses that are modest as well 100% of the time..

it wasn't always like this... when i was lost i was dressing in pants and shorts and would show cleavage... my dd now believes modesty is best and i am soooo glad because she is 9 yrs old and the children at her old public school would wear pants with words on their bum and short shorts.. it was just terrible...

[magstphil]

OT but Tricia your daughter is so gorgeous!

[annettemarie]

Oh, wow, Tricia! I didn't know you converted to Mennonite! I was just at a Midwife Day celebration with lots of Amish and Mennonite midwives. Some were "granny" midwives (there was one very old Amish women. She looked rather severe but Daniel loved her. She would pick him up and they would just beam at each other. He was trying to pull the pins from her dress :lol) and some were CPMs.

I do dress modestly. I mostly wear skirts (I like "hippie" skirts) and knit tops for nursing. I love dresses, but don't find them to be very practical for nursing. Tricia, I love the cape dresses with the nursing pleats. For some reason they work so much better than any nursing dress that's manufactured.

I used to dress my daughter only in dresses. My premise was that if she grew up wearing dresses, she would just be used to it. I did let her where pants around when she was 4 and she asked for them. I realized that I was operating out of fear, and "God did not give us a spirit of fear." Since I don't believe there's a specific command to wear skirts and dresses only, and it's just a personal conviction, I decided it was unfair to hold her to a standard that I had set for myself (does that make sense?) I do only buy modest clothes for her, although it's getting more and more difficult to find things new. Luckily, I am the thrift store queen. :lol

I will say that I find it's fairly easy to find modest clothes in the regular stores. I've looked at some of the "modest" shops online that seem to be targetting a specific audience, and they seem to have confused modest with ugly.

[heidirk]

Please hear my gentle tone as I give my opinion... :shy

My mom made such a big deal about dressing modestly when I was a DC that I grew to hate the word. I felt like my body was dirty, and needed to be hidden. I feel much differently now, though, especially after one too many men talked directly to my breasts and not to me. I should say that I know this is the way God made them. I don't hold itagainst them, but I on't encourage it either!

I've wondered if too much emphasis on modest dress too early can be just as sexualizing as no emphasis, cheeky shorts, etc? When would you start? And how do you say it in a way that makes a girl feel special and like a treasure?



I do prefer modest dress for myself, I have an issue because it's hard for me to find shirts that don't show my boobs. Because I am a ministry candidate now, I've askedmy (female) pastor/mentor to alert me if I am dressed at all inapropriately. So I do support modest dress, but how early is too early?

[annettemarie]

I think those are great points, and you said much better what I was trying to vocalize. For me it's a great decision, but I don't want my daughter to stress out about it.

Since kids don't buy their own clothes (at least not mine) I think you just buy what you're comfortable with. And then deal with things on a case-by-case basis. I have no problem with my seven-year-old wearing a sun dress with spaghetti straps now. I don't know how I'll feel when she's older, but at some point, I have to trust her own judgment on these things.

You really make some great points!

[magstphil]

Growing up I hated modesty as well. I kept thinking "why should I be ashamed of my body and hide it away?" Now I have a different perspective and I wholeheartedly plan on sharing it with my girls (and boys if we ever have them :lol). I am not in any way a "because I said so" type mother. I will make sure my daughters understand that their bodies are sacred and beautiful and deserve to be treated as such. When we share too much of something it can lose it's sacredness. Of course this is all individual but this is my personal experience- I am not trying to speak for others. This actually brings me to my other worry- I am worried that my kids might think those who don't dress as modestly as we might are less than us or "sluts" or whatever. I want them to know that that is just not true. That a person shouldn't be judged by what they wear. That a persons worth isn't in their attire. I'm really concerned they will become holier-than-thou about it. But all we can do is talk it through and be open with our kids and lead by example. They won't ever hear such judgments out of my mouth. Hopefully that will be a big influence.

[monkeyscience]

Wow those are so beautiful! I admit I wouldn't mind wearing one....and I'm not of the Muslim faith. :o

I've thought that so many times - they look very classy and comfortable! I'm also a Christian and a modest dresser (sleeves, no cleavage, shorts/skirts at least to the knees and generally longer, etc.), so I doubt I'd ever wear a jilbab or abaya. Well, unless I moved to the Middle East for some reason... then I definitely would!

Current fashion frustrates me a lot (although I'm glad longer shirts have come in!). It's already difficult for me to find clothes that fit my body well (apparently my thighs are disproportionately big :p), and trying to find things that are modest on top of that is often impossible. My favorite skirts are homemade, from a pattern someone introduced me to when I was a missionary (for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (www.mormon.org))... they're mid-calf length, wide, and flowy. No one can tell you have fat thighs in a skirt! I'd like to make some summer ones, though, as the ones I currently have are way to heavy for winter. (In case anyone's interested, it's Butterick 4136.) Anyone else have good patterns, or cheap sources for modest clothing?

[monkeyscience]

Please hear my gentle tone as I give my opinion... :shy

My mom made such a big deal about dressing modestly when I was a DC that I grew to the word. I felt like my body was dirty, and needed to be hidden. I feel much differently now, though, especially after one too many men talked directly to my and not to me. I should say that I know this is the way God made them. I don't hold itagainst them, but I on't encourage it either!

I've wondered if too much emphasis on modest dress too early can be just as ualizing as no emphasis, cheeky shorts, etc? When would you start? And how do you say it in a way that makes a feel special and like a treasure?

I think it depends a LOT on how you go about it. When kids are really young, you pick their clothing anyway, so they'll wear what they have, and that's that.

Once they get old enough to start noticing other types of clothing and to ask for them, then you need a new strategy. :) I don't have children yet, so take this with a grain of salt, but I think that's a great time to start teaching them about how special their bodies are, and who gets to see them and who doesn't. Unfortunately, in the world we live in, this is also important so our kids can learn to recognize and report s*ex*ual abuse. :( I plan on trying to accentuate the positive in every possible way, though - telling them how wonderful their bodies are, instead of how bad it is to reveal them.

I really do think, though, that dressing modestly (whatever that means to you) should be taught from a very young age. It was hard for me to understand why I'd been allowed to wear things (like tanktops) my whole life, and then, suddenly, I couldn't any more. (This happened when I was around 10.) JMO.

(Pardon the *s... I'm working around the Cybersitter. :p)

[JessicaRenee]

If a skirt is just a tiny bit too short (like, it hits right AT the knee instead of just a little below, which is where I like mine to go), you could jazz it up a bit with a pretty patterned fabric or thick lace. On The Purl Bee there was just a really cute pattern for a wrap skirt. Here's the link: http://www.purlbee.com/the-purl-bee/2008/5/1/colorful-crafting-with-jen-indygo-junction-its-a-wrap-skirt.html

Layering things helps a lot, too. I just bought two tank tops, one with spaghetti straps, that I wear over and/or under other shirts or sweaters. Boleros/"shrugs" are great too. This is where being a knitter comes in very handy! ;) If a shirt is too short, they have patterns for knit or crocheted 'corsets' (they aren't really, but that's the closest image I could come up with). Or you could get something like this ( https://www.downeastbasics.com/index.asp?PageAction=VIEWPROD&ProdID=32 ) to wear under shirts.

[lilsparrow]

I dress modestly! *To me* anyway.:D

I do wear pants, but not if they accentuate my butt too much, and they can't be too tight.

I think spaghetti straps are ugly, just MO.

And I've tossed all of my super high heels. Just don't have it in me to suffer like that anymore.

Nice to meet you all.:love

[Olives]

I'm considering dressing more modestly, i've never dressed sleazy, but i have always thought that it was ok to dress a little sexy. I wear alot of spagetti strap t's, alot of my shirts show some cleavage, but i'am beginning to have different opinions on it! Though where i live theres not alot of modest dressing going on, (Cali) especially with young and middle aged women!

I think I'm very much where you are right now. I've decluttered my closet and have given up so many things but, I have a few dresses and tops that aren't very modest that I just can't seem to give up. Although, I've been noticing how much more comfortable I am when I'm dressed modestly.

[JessicaRenee]

Where is your fave type of skirt?

I like A-line skirts best.

[magstphil]

I have a few dresses and tops that aren't very modest that I just can't seem to give up.
You might be able to alter these. For instance I have a few gorgeous sleeveless dresses that i love. What I do is I wear a cap sleeved shirt underneath them. You could even wear a sweater or shrug if the sleevage is the issue.

[GooeyRN]

I consider myself a modest dresser compared to the mainstream. I do not wear low cut tops. I never show cleavage. I really don't like to wear shirts below the collar bone, but they are difficult to find. I do not wear spaghetti straps or sleeveless. I do wear short sleeves that go half way to the elbow, though. I do not wear my tops tight. I do wear pants, but not jeans. And I do not wear pants tight/form fitting. If they are low rise I am certain to wear a long shirt that does not allow any skin to show when I scoot down or bend over. The skirts I wear are at least knee length, and not tight/form fitting. I do sometimes wear shorts but they are knee length. I usually avoid shorts b/c I am short and wearing long shorts looks silly on a short person. I do not wear high heals or strappy sandals, or boots with heals. I do not have an elaborate or sexy hair style. It is butt length, all one length and straight. I wear it in a bun, pony tail, or braid.

I am Catholic and supposed to dress modestly, but I was never taught what exactly is or isn't modest, ya know? I try to avoid things that are "sexy". I think its ok to be stylish, but not sexy. I don't really dress stylish, though. I am more of a bland dresser. DH says that I dress "frumpy". He wants other men to oogle me, b/c then he feels like I am a catch.

My goal is to NOT look like I am trying to attract men, or cause a man to lust after me causing them to sin. For me to dress sexy, and a man to look at me lustfully, is not only his sin, but my sin also for not covering enough. If a man looks at me lustfully and I am not dressed sexy, that is not my sin, only his.

[JessicaRenee]

I have a few dresses and tops that aren't very modest that I just can't seem to give up.

You could wear a longer skirt under the dresses if they're too short.

[UmmIbrahim]

I'm a Muslim mama who dresses modestly...I've worn hijab (head scarf and modest clothing) since 1999! So quite a long time.

I must say, I am totally a fan of ShukrOnline...they r a bit pricy but the quality is FANTASTIC and ALL is very very modest yet classic/stylish. I LOVE their stuff. I used to pretty much just wear long thin/lightweight coats called manteau (montoo) or Jilbab, but now since I had my son I have moved to long tunics and baggy jeans and sometimes skirts. Hence my luv for Shukr. I travel to Iran frequently and so like to stock up on scarves and the shorter style manteau.

I keep trying to get myself more into skirts, but just am having difficulty doing so...I don't feel as comfy in them as I do a baggy pair of pants, eh...we'll see whether I can ever move more into them. Eventually I hope to move back into the longer manteau/jilbabs...but only after my son is a bit older (I always worry about tripping, etc)

[UmmIbrahim]

I don't understand or like current fashions that seem to be all about showing off as much skin as possible, and wearing things that look like underwear. I'm not at all religious, but I just don't see how it's empowering to women to walk around half-naked while men wear clothes that reasonably cover their bodies.

I agree with you entirely...I know it's not just religious folk who dress modestly but many sensible people do so as well...and honestly, I don't understand fashion nowadays either! It's almost obscene...really, sometimes I blush! And I'm a female! I pity the guys. Plus I find it depressing how some women feel they need to show off their assets to get attention from men and hence feel good about themselves...frankly, I never thought self-esteem was linked to how many times a guy scopes you out. *yuck*. It's a very twisted sense of self-esteem.

ugh

[GooeyRN]

I don't understand fashion nowadays either! It's almost obscene...really, sometimes I blush! And I'm a female! I pity the guys. Plus I find it depressing how some women feel they need to show off their assets to get attention from men and hence feel good about themselves...frankly, I never thought self-esteem was linked to how many times a guy scopes you out. *yuck*. It's a very twisted sense of self-esteem.

ugh

ITA Needing to be checked out to feel good about yourself is sad.

[Tithonia]

This is such an interesting thread! I haven't met very many people who purposefully dress modestly, so I'm really enjoying reading all your posts. :) It's really making me think about WHY I choose to dress modestly. I think for me it's part comfort and part principle (female empowerment, to be specific--same reason I don't shave...)

I really appreciated the comments from heidirk about dressing our daughters. I agree that (for me, at least) a large part of how I dress her is that I want to avoid her seeing herself as a sexual object (at least as long as possible, in this culture). And like she said, that means I don't want to emphasize modesty when she's young, either. There is definitely lots of clothing out there that I would consider inappropriate for little girls, though, and I'm definitely not going to dress her that way. There is also lots of clothing that is pretty without being inappropriate. It may seem silly to be thinking about this now, since DD is still an infant, and yet... DH and I have chosen to never dress her in pink, because we don't like the "girly" associations. In a way, that's a modesty issue. I've been thinking about what modesty means, and I'm thinking it means, at least in part, dressing appropriately. This means different things to different people. But in our family that means that it is fine for everyone to be naked at home as long as everyone is comfortable with that... I grew up in a family like that, and I think it really contributed to the positive body image I had as a teenager, which in turn meant I didn't feel the need to affirm myself through sexy clothing. I don't consider that immodest because, well, there was nothing that needed covering. Outside of the family, on the other hand, why should I show strangers what I'm not doing them or myself any good by showing?

By the way, I also make my own skirts and divided skirts--full and ankle-length, the way I like it. :)

[Moonprysm]

oooh wow! I was pointed here! YAY!!

I am currently transitioning to modest/simple dress. I've already taken pants entirely out of my wardrobe (with the exception of when I go to births - I just haven't found a skirt that works yet, and I wear 3/4 length thai pants, so they've pretty baggy and modest). I'm currently working on making all of my clothes. I have 4 dresses that I've made so far, and although I've made some compromises to help DH deal with the transition (such as using funky prints on my simple dresses - the last one I made was a black top with a hot pink skirt that had skulls and stuff on it), they are a plain design that works for nursing AND maternity. My goal is to have clothing that will work for all seasons of my life so that I don't have to spend excessive money to have a seperate wardrobe for maternity and nursing and neither.

When I'm not wearing the dresses I've made, it's usually a skirt from Goodwill and a t-shirt that is loose enough not to hug my curves. I also headcover. My outfit for the day often shows a lot of how I'm feeling spiritually. If I'm feeling strong, I can cover with a bandana and wear a skirt and t-shirt. If I'm feeling spiritually weak, I can put on a simple dress and a traditional covering and it's like dressing for success. It's a constant reminder of my faith and will often help me get through a difficult day.

I'm so glad to have found you mamas!

[damona]

i've been reading and thinking about the things i've read in this thread since y'all started it. i don't dress particularly *sexy*, i don't think, but i'm not as *modest* as many of you are either. i wear pants (usually jeans) or capris, but rarely, if ever, wear shorts. if i wear shorts, it's only in the house, cuz it gets hothothot in summer! all of my skirts are knee-length or longer, and the 2 i wear the most are ankle length. i do wear tank tops, but not usually spaghetti strap ones, or super low cut ones. i don't cover my hair (which is almost to my waist and orangy-red!) but i do wear it up 99% of the time in a bun or a braid. i hate swimsuits, i can never find one that feels like it covers enough, so if i swim at a friends pool or lake i wear long cutoffs and a tshirt. the only makeup i wear is light mascara and lip gloss.

i went through a period of time where i tried to dress provacatively and do my hair all down and everything, but it was rebellion, pure and simple. my mother hated those clothes, so i wore them every chance i got. it took me awhile, but i realized that the male attention i got was really not worth it AT ALL, and i got myself into pretty bad trouble a couple times.

now, it just seems both easier and more comfortable to dress more modestly. a lot of my friends still "dress to impress" if you know what i mean, but... it's just not that appealing anymore. we aren't either christian or muslim, so it's definitely not a religious thing (hope i'm not insulting anyone, just that those are the 2 religions that i know of that sometimes have rules about modest dress). my husband sometimes presses me to dress sexier when we go out, he likes when other guys check me out, but i'm really not into that anymore. we have our unconventional little family and that's quite enough!

[meowee]

Please hear my gentle tone as I give my opinion... :shy

My mom made such a big deal about dressing modestly when I was a DC that I grew to hate the word. I felt like my body was dirty, and needed to be hidden. I feel much differently now, though, especially after one too many men talked directly to my breasts and not to me. I should say that I know this is the way God made them. I don't hold itagainst them, but I on't encourage it either!

I've wondered if too much emphasis on modest dress too early can be just as sexualizing as no emphasis, cheeky shorts, etc? When would you start? And how do you say it in a way that makes a girl feel special and like a treasure?

I agree with you! I'm taking a moderate approach with my DDs. I "tell" them to cover shoulders and just to the knee (above the knee is ok) and that anything else IMHO is sort of like being naked in public, which around this house is considered rude. But, it's more of like I "strongly suggest it," I don't go overboard. One problem I've found is that with so many girls sharing clothes, some things will be much shorter on one girl than another. So the "just to the knee" rule seems to work.

However, if they reach teenagehood and decide to go nuts and dress in a way I find inappropriate, I will not make a big deal of it. I'll tell them my honest opinion of how they look, but never in a shameful way or in a way that makes them feel less than beautiful. "I wouldn't wear it, and I think it shows too much skin, but if you're determined to wear it I'm not going to fight you..." something along those lines.

[meowee]

I
I must say, I am totally a fan of ShukrOnline...they r a bit pricy but the quality is FANTASTIC and ALL is very very modest yet classic/stylish. I LOVE their stuff.

Oh wow, that stuff looks great. This is exactly the sort of outfit I am comfortable in, minus the gathered cuff on the sleeve:

http://www.shukronline.com/wb0661.html

But you're right, it is kind of pricey.

[damona]

thanks for the shukr link, the skirts are just the type that i love! i bookmarked it, so when we have $$ again, i can get one! :)

[Faliciagayle]

To those who mentioned a desire to dress more modestly now that they have daughters... do you have sons as well?

I wonder, would the birth of a son spark the same kind of desire?

(fwiw, I'm a Jewish mama moving towards more observance, slowly making the move to more modest dress. Also, I have batwings. When did that happen? Not so cute in tank tops, let me tell you.)

If I could choose any style of dress, it would be the Indian/Hindu Kameez style of tunics over pants. They are SO beautiful and flattering! I personally wouldn't feel comfortable, however, since they are so closely associated with another culture and religion. I also enjoyed the link to ShukrOnline - totally my style ;)

[Olives]

wow, thank you for that link! I can't wait to save up and get a few items.

I have a question... how did all of your husbands respond to your modest dressing? For my husband this is a huge change from what he is used to. Especially since all of his friends are not even church goers at all. He has been really supportive of my views but I don't really want to push too far too fast...

Any tips would be great!

[Moonprysm]

To those who mentioned a desire to dress more modestly now that they have daughters... do you have sons as well?

I wonder, would the birth of a son spark the same kind of desire?

(fwiw, I'm a Jewish mama moving towards more observance, slowly making the move to more modest dress. Also, I have batwings. When did that happen? Not so cute in tank tops, let me tell you.)

If I could choose any style of dress, it would be the Indian/Hindu Kameez style of tunics over pants. They are SO beautiful and flattering! I personally wouldn't feel comfortable, however, since they are so closely associated with another culture and religion. I also enjoyed the link to ShukrOnline - totally my style ;)

I only have a son, but I hope to have daughters in the future. It wasn't so much his birth that inspired me, but it is now his life. I started going to the LDS church when he was 9 months old and joined in December, and I just think about how I lacked a proper role model growing up, and I want my son to grow up in a home where he has respect for women and wants to marry the right kind of woman, kwim?

I have a question... how did all of your husbands respond to your modest dressing? For my husband this is a huge change from what he is used to. Especially since all of his friends are not even church goers at all. He has been really supportive of my views but I don't really want to push too far too fast...

My husband had an issue at first. I stopped wearing pants (something I've been wanting to do for YEARS but never did) and he said he wanted me to occationally wear something sexy out so he could "show me off". Once he realized that that wasn't going to happen, he was fine. It was more of a "I respect your choice, but I just want to make sure you know my complaint" and then it was dropped. I recently bought some really wild fabric to make a dress with because he wanted me to wear something more "gothic". It turned out really awesome, and it's still the same, modest dress pattern I usually use, just spiced up a bit more to DH's liking.

picture of dress (http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v205/moonprysm/dress001.jpg)

[tricia80]

OT but Tricia your daughter is so gorgeous!

Thank you.... :love

[tricia80]

Oh, wow, Tricia! I didn't know you converted to Mennonite! I was just at a Midwife Day celebration with lots of Amish and Mennonite midwives. Some were "granny" midwives (there was one very old Amish women. She looked rather severe but Daniel loved her. She would pick him up and they would just beam at each other. He was trying to pull the pins from her dress :lol) and some were CPMs.


Yeah it is usually a shocker for all who know me... my family still has issues with the conversion but my mom is supportive and i have a new family now so its all good...

i feel free'r this way... i don't have to worry about making sure im completely covered by pulling down my shirt etc... it is disgusting to see what the young girls wear these days... i am glad that my dd has followed in my ways and she goes to a private mennonite school and we don't have to worry about bad influences...

[monkeyscience]

If I could choose any style of dress, it would be the Indian/Hindu Kameez style of tunics over pants. They are SO beautiful and flattering! I personally wouldn't feel comfortable, however, since they are so closely associated with another culture and religion. I also enjoyed the link to ShukrOnline - totally my style ;)

I would live in clothes like that, too, or, as I mentioned previously in a jilbab or something similar, but I have the same concern with wearing something that is part of a culture/religion I clearly am not a part of. It's not like I'd feel 'less Christian' or anything... it's hard to explain. I just don't have that much of a go-against-the-flow mentality, I suppose.

[lilsparrow]

I confess, I have drooled over some of the clothes muslim women wear. I would LOVE to wear them. I just don't think I am so *go against the flow* either.:innocent

But oh I wish I was. Some of the sites catering to orthodox Jewish women are very pretty too. I'll have to see if I can dig up some links.

[neveryoumindthere]

Put your reservations aside and wear what you want! Even if you think it belongs to some other "culture"/religion. What's that saying "Imitation is the best form of flattery" or something like that:) I'm sure I butchered that.


Anyway off topic, but do you modest mamas have anything you prefer to wear in labour/birth??
I designed a pair of pants that are totally covered with a hidden slit in the crotch area for the birth time but when it comes down to it I honestly want to wear something "nice" for the labour. Maybe a knee-length stretchy dress? I don't know..I know most of the replies I see on MDC say they went naked, but I'm not comfortable doing that, even if I were to UC. I just dont walk around naked yk?
Wondered what you all did.

[*andiflipping*]

Put your reservations aside and wear what you want! Even if you think it belongs to some other "culture"/religion. What's that saying "Imitation is the best form of flattery" or something like that:) I'm sure I butchered that.


Anyway off topic, but do you modest mamas have anything you prefer to wear in labour/birth??
I designed a pair of pants that are totally covered with a hidden slit in the crotch area for the birth time but when it comes down to it I honestly want to wear something "nice" for the labour. Maybe a knee-length stretchy dress? I don't know..I know most of the replies I see on MDC say they went naked, but I'm not comfortable doing that, even if I were to UC. I just dont walk around naked yk?
Wondered what you all did.


I plan on wearing a long swim skirt with a comfortable tank top. It will only be Dh and the 2 midwives here though.

[neveryoumindthere]

I've seen shorter swim skirts, but not long ones. Where could I get one?
That sounds ideal

[imnottelling]

I confess, I have drooled over some of the clothes muslim women wear. I would LOVE to wear them. I just don't think I am so *go against the flow* either.:innocent

But oh I wish I was. Some of the sites catering to orthodox Jewish women are very pretty too. I'll have to see if I can dig up some links.
http://www.fmfcorp.com/familyspot/shopping.html has a fabulous collection of links.

Regarding to what to wear in birth, by my home birth, I wore a knee length t-shirt, and put a robe over that, planning on removing the robe for delivery...I had no presence of mind to do that, and I ended up wearing my robe hiked up and just delivered my baby standing!

[Moonprysm]

I saw a skirt designed for modest birthing once. Maybe you could google it? Personally, labor is a whole different arena. I can't stand to have clothes on. But I understand that some people aren't comfortable with that. :)

[*andiflipping*]

I've seen shorter swim skirts, but not long ones. Where could I get one?
That sounds ideal

Mine is just above my knees. I don't know if that is long enough for you but better than naked if you are going for that. My friend gave me mine but I have seen long ones at JcPenny and Kohls and stores like that.

[*andiflipping*]

I saw a skirt designed for modest birthing once. Maybe you could google it? Personally, labor is a whole different arena. I can't stand to have clothes on. But I understand that some people aren't comfortable with that. :)

Here is a good site...

http://www.birthinbinsi.com/index.htm

I would love one but I am too cheap to spend that on one day. :innocent

[Moonprysm]

Here's a birthing skirt. Now the one I originally saw, though. I'll keep looking.

http://www.supermomz.com/store/original-birth-skirt-binsi-p-272.html

[sunkissedmumma67]

:lurk:

[Moonprysm]

Put your reservations aside and wear what you want! Even if you think it belongs to some other "culture"/religion. What's that saying "Imitation is the best form of flattery" or something like that:) I'm sure I butchered that.

I agree. The headcovering that I wear a lot is somewhat mennonite/amish. At first I felt kind of uncomfortable going out of the house in it, but eventually I learned not to care. And I've never had anybody say anything bad about it, and we have a huge mennonite community here.

[3tammuz]

Hi. I just found this forum. Please add me to the group of modest-dressing mamas. I am Orthodox Jew and thus always dressed with arms and legs covered. Only wear skirts. Head covered - I usually wear hats or scarves, but own a wig for "fancy" dress. I have enjoyed reading and learning from the group.

[CharlieBrown]

I dress modestly. So do my children, including 4 yo son. :)

[Parthenia]

:tiphat: I dress modestly.
I have one pair of jeans, but my other pants are big baggy patchy cords that I wear in winter. In cold weather I wear long skirts. In warm weather I wear shorter skirts that go below the knee so they don't get tangled in my bike. Occasionally I wear capris, but no shorts. I mostly wear 3/4 length or longer sleeves year round. I have a couple shorter sleeve tee shirts.

I cover my head, but for practical reasons. I have really long, heavy hair, and scarves and hair wraps keep my hair out of the way.

[Kidzaplenty]

:wave

Hi! I am a modest dressing MOMYS. :D

FTR, my idea of modest is nothing overly tight or revealing. I will wear short sleeved shirts, and SOMETIMES (although very rarely, and usually only when REALLY hot) a sleveless shirt, but never anything that can not be worn without a bra (so no speghetti straps, strapless, or backless). I MAY wear shorts, but only longer shorts (and those, again, only if REALLY hot, and only around my house and yard).

I prefer to wear LONG skirts, ankle lenghth (my preference, not an "obligation"). I will wear dresses that are calf lenghth and I will wear jeans.

My basic "standards" for modesty that I and my family adhere to:
Shorts, only if longer than the tips of your fingers.
Shirts, that you can conceal a bra under and will not show belly when arms are lifted above your head.
Skirts, that come below the kneecap when sitting, at least.
Pants, that are waste high (no really low cut, or bagging so they fall off), and not overly tight.
Bathing suits, one piece unless it is more of a shirt/shorts combo kind, and is not "high cut on bottom" or "low cut on top".
And my girls wear bras as soon as they begin to show. (I know that is a big thing here, but we are a "little" on the bigger side so it looks much nicer when we have them on.)


My girls (including me) do not cut hair shorter than shoulder length (conviction), we believe girls should look like "girls".
My boys do not have hair longer than shoulder length - not really a conviction, but a standard based on beliefs as well as practicallity-DH, and my boys have very "wirey" hair, more like AA hair so it "afros" if it gets long and looks really horrible.


I don't force my beliefs on others, nor do I look down on someone that is dressed differently. Even for my girls, it is not a burden that I "force" on them, it is just a standard that I have always believed and they have picked it up by watching my example over the years.

Anyways, just wanted to introduce myself a bit. :D

[magstphil]

Hey Jenny! You know how I love to have you around :lol Glad to see you here. :D

[ghostlykisses]

Hi there, another modest dressing Momma here.

I have gone through different phases of modesty since I became convicted about the way I dressed. When I was a teen and young adult I dressed sexy often. Short shorts, cleavage, the whole nine yards.

In my early 20's I felt I needed to change my dress and went in the total opposite direction of where I had been. I was wearing some pretty frumpy stuff. My poor DH was horrified.

I slowly found my own standard of modesty and style. Mostly long skirts and shirts that were not too low cut. I really like "hippy" patchwork skirts and a t-shirt. I like ankle length skirts best but I have a couple that are just below my knee. Knee length is as short as I go.

I have recently added capris back into my DD's and I's wardobes. I do not like how shorts look on women or girls, it is a personal choice so we just do not go there. I will wear a pair of my husbands at home to garden or work out but not in public.

I wear tank tops as long as they do not show unneeded cleavage. I also wear some more form fitted t-shirts because while I want to be modest I do not want to look frumpy and baggy shirts make me look like I am really over weight because I have a larger chest and it makes the shirt hang off me like a tent.

I have the same standards for my DD who is 8. I have been teaching her about modesty since she was quite small so she is used to it and has no problem with it. I really have never had a time when she has complained or asked for something that was not modest. She does ask at times for jeans which I do not love but I will let her wear if they are modest and not too low cut or tight. I do not want her to be a a sexual object.

It's good to hear that there are so many modest ladies from all backgrounds who are choosing to go against the grain and dress more modestly than mainstream culture wants us to.

[JessicaRenee]

Hey, I don't know how you ladies feel about swimwear but I usually dread this time of year because I can never find a cute bathing suit. All the "modest" ones are modest on top with thick straps and higher cuts, but the bottoms still show off too much leg (that, and, ahem, I don't wax :innocent) and I get discouraged. But I just found this website with has swimming shorts & skirts and thought some of you would be interested.

http://www.athleta.com/jump.jsp?itemID=475&itemType=CATEGORY&LeftNavToExpandID=27&iMainCat=4&iSubCat=475&viewall=1

There's also this site:

http://ohanaswimwear.com/

[Moonprysm]

Does anybody know where to find a modest plus size swim suit that doesn't cost $100??? Holy cow. I may just have to stay out of the water this year. :(

[Moonprysm]

Ok mamas, I need your help! I need modest maternity shirts/skirts/dresses patterns, BUT I need plus size. I'm having a REALLY hard time finding anything, so help would be great! (and for dresses, they really need to have a nursing option so that I don't get caught in a position where I can't nurse DS if we're out somewhere and he gets tired).

[phathui5]

For some reason, I would love to cover my hair, but no one really does around here, so I haven't done so yet, it'll take more courage on my part.


I started this a few months ago and it's a very comfortable thing for me. I cover with a scarf or bandana. There are some Jewish women around here and some headcovering Mennonites, so it's not just me (though it's still not common).

I seem to remember someone talking about daughters and modesty here. When do you think we should start dressing our daughters modestly? I have 3 little girls and I have a hard time with this.

I've always dressed my daughter modestly. As she gets older, I give explanations about why I have her wear some things. "We put shorts under your dress so you can play without people seeing your underwear." For me, I think starting out this way has kept her from feeling like it's a restriction and more that it's just the way we dress in our family.

[JessicaRenee]

Moonprysm, here's a tutorial on adding a drop-front to your dress for nursing. It's on a Regency-era dress but it should be very easy to adapt to any dress pattern. :) Hope this helps! :)

http://www.sensibility.com/pattern/dropfront/index.htm

[monkeyscience]

There's also this site:

http://ohanaswimwear.com/

Oh my gosh! Swimming suits with LEGS! Jessica, you are my hero. If I end up moving to Hawai'i, I'm definitely going to save the money for one of those! I really love the Molokai one - it has a modest tanktop so I can still get some sun on areas of my body that are actually exposed when I'm not wearing a swimsuit, but no more worrying about the bottom half!

Thanks for the link!

[nurnur]

couldn't sleep and then stumbled....or was lead here. Im an LDS mama and try to follow modest standards, I don't do tank tops or shorts, nothing too sexy or revealing. I think this is a good place for me to be since I need the influence of others who are living and teaching modesty to their families. I have twin 8 yo girls who want to be at the height of fashion, this time of year I dread taking them into any store that has clothing. They have many friends from school and the neighborhood who wear things we don't and they sometimes think it is "so unfair".

[Gabesgrrrl]

Hi everyone,
hmmm....I read some of these posts, (not all of them-there are a LOT!) and have something similar to chat about:

I live in Canada, and live in a largely Muslim area. I'm NOT muslim, and have no issues with modest dress, (actually LOVE head coverings!) though I wouldn't say I would classify myself as such...

But: Here's the thing: I have SUCH a tough time with the Muslim dress that only leaves the very little slot for the eyes.

I know I'm an American, and there are cultural beliefs I'm sure I hold without realizing it-but I strongly am against women dressing in such a way as it feels to me like it removes their identity-and that they're hiding something...I have respectfully approached and spoken with one woman in such a garment, and learned a lot-but she contradicted her "free" choice by saying:" My husband lets me wear anything I want to when we're at home-even pants!"...

I'd love to hear others thoughts on this, and am open to gentle discussion about the topic, as I don't want to offend or insult anyone and their beliefs-I'm just human, and this is the one thing I can't seem to work through by myself!

Thanks for listening, and for any future responses.:)

Marcie

[neveryoumindthere]

I'll bite:)
I know there is at least one sister (Nabbe) on MDC who wears the face veil/niqab, so she may be better able to answer, but I'll try anyway.

I did wear it for a few months, but unfortunately found I wasn't strong enough to handle all the stares and comments and general mean-ness of ppl..

Anyway, the muslim woman wearing the face veil is not hiding her identity. That is *part* of some muslim womens' identity. To be recognized as a practicing muslimah. It's just another level of modesty. The face is a place of beauty, and many women choose to cover it. Many women at the time of the Prophet Mohammed (peace and blessings be upon him) wore the face veil.

As for whether or not it's obligatory, there are 2 scholarly opinions. One is that is mustahabb(strongly preferred/liked) for a woman to cover her face, and the other is that it is obligatory. I struggle(d) with this for years because both sides have strong evidence from both the Qur'an and Sunnah(teachings/sayings/actions approved of by the Prophet)

I know sisters in both camps. Most of them though wear it because they feel it is strongly preferred and they feel more comfortable and protected covering their face in front of unrelated males. If you were in some social setting where there were only women and children, most likely they would lift their veils.

As for her comment about her husband letting her wear whatever she wants, I can't speak for her, but perhaps it was worded that way because of the common misconception that her husband *made* her wear the veil so she's like "huh? that's so silly, I can wear whatever I want at home."

As I said I know many many niqabi sisters, and not *one* is doing it for her husband. They are very much doing it to please their Lord. If it pleases their husband in the process, great. If not, oh well.

In my case, for instance, when I decided to start wearing it, hubby was *not* impressed. He doesn't feel it's necessary and he preferred I didn't. I did it anyway :shrug

If it makes a difference, I'm not from "another culture". I'm speaking as a North American, born and raised in this culture who came to Islam when I was 19.

HTH

[annettemarie]

Please keep in mind that Finding Your Tribe is a support-only forum. This particular thread is a support thread for women who choose to dress modestly. It is not intended to be an "ask a modest dresser" thread. Questions such as the one above are best hosted in another forum, probably spirituality. Thanks!

[Gabesgrrrl]

I didn't realize it wasn't a good place to ask. I'll move it elsewhere.:)

And thank you to neveryoumindthere for her very honest, very informative answer to my question!

Hugs!

Marcie

[AJP]

I just wanted to say that board shorts and rash guard shirts make great swimwear, and knee-length board shorts aren't uncommon, sometimes you can even find them in capri lengths. They're made from quick-drying material, and designed for going in the water. I dislike regular swimwear, both because it's too revealing for me to want to be in public in it and because it's so uncomfortable to me. Try surf shops or catalogs with surf wear for that kind of stuff.

[*~Member~*]

I've recently become personally convicted to dress modestly. But am having a bit of a tough change over. However I've been sort of conservatively dressing for about 5 years. I've not worn anything shorter then capri mid calf pants or long pants in that time. The tank tops is what will be hard for me to give up.

I'm slowly doing it though

[Eve80]

Hi Mamas,

I'm a hijab wearing Muslim woman and have been for...about 15 years or so. I just found this (http://welovehijab.com/)site and I thought it was cool, especially the profiles of "Haute Hijabis."

[annettemarie]

I'm so excited! I found a suitable suit for Katie Grace at Target today. I don't hit the modesty stuff hard with my kids or anything, but you know it's bad when the children are all "Why are there holes in the side?!? That's not modest!"

[*~Member~*]

Thank you to whoever posted the SHUKR site! I adore adore some of those tunics and I LOVE the skirts!! I have a lot of very wide leg pants or full skirts.

My favourite is the Asymmetrical Flared Skirt and the jean skirts!

[damona]

i discovered something very odd a couple of days ago.... i can't stand to wear jeans anymore! i've got 3 ankle-length skirts, and as soon as it started getting warmer i started wearing them all the time. i wore jeans to one of my kids' dr appts the other day, and they felt so strange... like itchy and overly confining... not to mention the pressure on my bad hip was just uncomfortable... as soon as i got home i changed into my long denim skirt! it was downright strange, i tell you...

[GooeyRN]

i discovered something very odd a couple of days ago.... i can't stand to wear jeans anymore! i've got 3 ankle-length skirts, and as soon as it started getting warmer i started wearing them all the time. i wore jeans to one of my kids' dr appts the other day, and they felt so strange... like itchy and overly confining... not to mention the pressure on my bad hip was just uncomfortable... as soon as i got home i changed into my long denim skirt! it was downright strange, i tell you...


I HATE the feeling of jeans. I can't wear them.

[*~Member~*]

I also do not wear jeans. Haven't for years. I do wear denim skirts but the feeling of jeans drive me NUTS

[moonshoes]

Hi Mamas! Glad I found this thread. I've been wanting to dress modestly for years but somehow always end back up in my jeans and tshirts,,,

I think mostly it is because I don't come from a religious family and my husband is not religious so I feel funny coming out and truly living my faith the way that I feel convicted to do...I have a hard time staying out of the secular world, but recently my DD (6) has been saying she wants long shorts, doesn't want her legs showing, and I really feel she is being led to dress modestly in a natural way and that I have a responsibility to be her example.

Anway, thanks for being here and giving me inspiration.

[imnottelling]

I just took a look at the birthing skirt...is it really worth it to spend almost $50 on something that likely will get ruined, when you can get a regular flairy skirt for $10?

[phathui5]

I haven't tried birthing with clothes on, but I would get the cheaper skirt myself.

[imnottelling]

Hey, I'm not looking to buy anything -- I was just curious what the market is out there for spending so much money for this :p

(I actually gave birth to my second in a long robe hiked up because I completely forgot to take it off; my labor was that fast and intense!)

[heidirk]

I birthed in the nude!

Oh well. . .


I couldn't stand to have anything touching me once I hit transition.

[magstphil]

BUMP!

How is everyone doing in the summer? I for one hate my bathing suit! :(

[Faliciagayle]

I'm good. I have completely stopped wearing tank tops in public :) Around the house is totally different. I'll wear jeans out (like today, we went hiking) but I'm pretty much in skirts and 3/4 length tops all the time. I love it! Still got the hair uncovered.. and I dig my pants at the moment.

The bathing suit thing, oy. Baby and I are taking a swim class together and I've been wearing a long workout tank top and skirted swim bottom, while searching online for a good modest alternative. I think I'm going with a rash guard and board shorts, since that's where I am currently... not ready for the frum suit (http://www.frumfashion.com/home) or the princess suit (http://www.modestswimwear4u.com/english/english.html), tho I like that one a lot.

Also, are any other moms here athletes?

I compete in triathlons and I've been curious how other modest moms balance their athletic wardrobes with modesty? I can't see competing in some of the stuff I've seen online.

[Moonprysm]

I bought a t-shirt like bathing suit top at walmart YEARS ago (we were going to visit my grandparents and I didn't want them to see my tattoo on my back, lol). I found it in my drawer a month or so ago and my MIL helped me to take it apart and make a pattern out of it (plus make it maternity, lol) so I made a maternity version out of really cute fabric i got on sale at Hancocks. Then i took a bottom I had that had a "skirt" on it (it was like, 4 inches long, bleck) and I ripped the skirt off and put a longer one on. It's still a good deal shorter than I would wear "normally" but much more modest than that 4 inch crap. lol

[heidirk]

I was intrigued by those who don't wear jeans particularly. I do wear them, and I feel more comfortable in them than lots of ladies 'trousers' or dress slacks. I guess jeans just don't feel overtly feminine to me, they feel more gender neutral. Truthfully they feel like armor to me, I feel protected and anonymous when I wear them.

I guess modest dressing for me is a lot about just being not eye catching? :shrug

I got a fabulous plus sized maternity swimsuit at OldNavy.com! It has spagetti straps, but it completely covers my breasts, and the top is so roomy it hung down a bit like a skirt. The bottom had adjustable sides, so I could make it as modest as I liked.

I think the board shorts and surf wear are very cute, but with my sensory issues, I don't know if I'd ever get past all that wet fabric sticking to me.


I also found flowy capris at Motherhood maternity, which I adore. :love

[_apmama_]

Hey there! Another covered mama:thumb

I am a Muslim so covering belongs to my faith. Before I converted, well, I was a completely different person! I used to wear the shortest skirts I could get, short tops, you get the idea :yikes: It was very hard to change my ways and it didn't happen from one day to another either. I used to wear pants a lot with long shirt or tunic over. Then I got pregnant, couldn't fit into any pants anylonger so I started to wear skirts only - well and when I gave birth and lost all the extra weight, I realised that pants were not comfortable any more. Too tight at certain places :shy. So it's just skirts now. And I'm glad, it makes me feel like a woman. I love how women used to dress before, long skirts, aprons, you know. I don't always wear jilbab or abaya (traditional muslim clothing), I sew my own clothing as well.

But I still wear sweatpants at home. And one of my resolutions is to start dressing well while at home as well. Maybe not that modestly but I want to feel like a lady :innocent which is hard to do when wearing jogging pants and husband's tshirt.

[heidirk]

"Maybe not that modestly but I want to feel like a lady which is hard to do when wearing jogging pants and husband's tshirt." by apmama

:rotflmao


I know what you mean!

[chely7425]

I try to dress modestly, but I am still working towards it. I do wear pants, for awhile I didn't but then I got skinnier and I am not coordinated enough to take things in, so I have just been wearing what I have. I don't really wear tank tops in public, or shorts. Mostly knee length skirts or pants, and t-shirts or long sleeve shirts. We are on a really tight budget so I am just trying to make sure that as I am able to buy new things that I buy modest clothing. For me, I love feeling more feminine and I don't want to be looked at like a sex object if that makes sense.

I do have a question... I have very long legs, like abnormally long compared to the rest of me, how do I deal with this? Knee length skirts often end up being shorter then I am ok with and long skirts look odd because they hit me at a weird place... any tips?

[heidirk]

I have the same problem. I think the only way to get around that is either buy Talls or make your own. Buying Talls gets expensive though.

[bwylde]

Another LDS modest mama here. I always wear long skirts, tops to the elbow (although I've recently discovered and love 3/4 length sleeves! Where have they been all my life, lol!) and I have 1 pair of pants that I never wear (but may need someday) and I now have 2 pairs of capris (mostly for camping or when I go to the Dr or dentist and worry about skirt flying up). I love dressing like this! At home I usually wear a head scarf (not expressly for modesty's sake, but it just feels "right"). It's comfortable, I generally always look presentable, mind you I have some clothes just for the house as a mama gets stained easily, lol! I do have a problem in the chest area as I'm very overweight but I'm surprisingly small chested proportionately. So sometimes I have a bit of "hang" there with a couple of shirts (now relegated to home use). I have bought some tanks to layer with so that helps with my nice shirts that I don't want to give up, although that gets hot for someone who is always too warm.

My struggle is with DD. She's 3, almost 4 feet tall and 60lbs. Everything that fits is WAY too short! When I find things that are long enough, they are huge up top (usually since they're sized for girls around the age of puberty). I think I am going to have to start making her clothes since she's so hard to fit. MIL, who knows we strive to be modesty, often buys her things that compromise our standards. My mom has no standards :shy

BTW, I hold DS to the same standard but it's so much easier for boys.

[gagin37]

FTR, my idea of modest is nothing overly tight or revealing. I will wear short sleeved shirts, and SOMETIMES (although very rarely, and usually only when REALLY hot) a sleeveless shirt, but never anything that can not be worn without a bra (so no spaghetti straps, strapless, or backless). I MAY wear shorts, but only longer shorts (and those, again, only if REALLY hot, and only around my house and yard).

I prefer to wear LONG skirts, ankle length (my preference, not an "obligation"). I will wear dresses that are calf length and I will wear jeans.



This sounds very much like my brand of modesty too! I only wear shorts if I am not leaving my house, and if I wear a tank top in public I usually wear something over it, to cover my shoulders, even during the summer.

I also really like the idea that my naked skin is something just for my dh to enjoy. While I'm happy with my body the way it is, I don't want it to be on display. It's really refreshing to know there are other like-minded ladies out there, because sometimes mainstream American culture makes me feel frumpy and prudish.

[phathui5]

We did the beach thing last week and what I did was wear a thin cotton skirt from Target (dries quickly) and a t-shirt when we were in the water.

[phathui5]

I was posting some links on another thread and wanted to share them here. These are Christian links:

http://www.modestclothes.com/simple/articles/tips-for-christian-ladies-new-to-plain-and-simple-dressing.html

http://e-menno.org/headcvr.htm

http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/239780/why_i_wear_a_headcovering_a_christian.html

[Momma Aimee]

new here

I have always dressed "world modest" -- ie modest to most people -- no deep V neck lines, no short shorts, no lower back showing over my jeans and so on

but I am feeling drawn to be even more "orthodox / traditional" modest ... I espcailly feel drawn to cover, but i am really struggleing -- I feel "you can't cover and still wear shorts, tha tis jsut silly" and then i wonder "can you cover and still wear pants at all? or is that silly too" ... I mean if you (general you) are covereing for the sake of Modesty, to save yourself for DH, to obey God and stay in a constant state of pray or service .... uh your hair is, imo, the last worry -- the shorts and shirts are a more ready issue -- yk?

so I really don't know where i stand.

We are Christian, but not a fundemental or consertive church or congergation. and DH is treating this whole thing -- a LITTLE as I have told him -- as kinda silly adn another one of my whims ...

:eyesroll

I am aslo caught trying to be pratical -- ie not money for all new clothing, worried myself it is a whim or phase or "something", still need to play on the playground with 2 year old (and baby brother following him) and go to pool and so on .....

so i am totally struggleing.

:duh:shrug

and there are so many thing i keep thinking of ....if i am taking the boys to the playground, would i actually be MORE modest in pants / jeans than in a skirt? It is still modest to wear a bathing suit -- at the pool only -- just not on the way back and forth -- yk? ...and so on --

Also no one areound here covers, or really dresses THAT modest -- so then i worry am i actually drawing more attention to myself by covering / dressing ina certain way (and drawing attention is the oppseit of what i feel i want to do) ....

:bigeyes

so thanks for letting me join --

[OkiMom]

Hey ladies! Maybe you all can help me out.. Im 28 weeks pregnant right now and DH is in the Marines. Im due around the same time as his Marine Corps Ball (which is required for him to go to) so Im trying to find a modest maternity formal gown.. I haven't found anything. Someone suggested finding someone to make me one but then Im looking at a lot more money than I can afford. Anyone have any ideas where I can find one?

My requirements are: It has to have sleeves, it has to be high cut in front (and in back) and full length.. The ball is formal/semi formal but Id like to err on the side of causion and get a more formal dress (Ive been to several and I was very embarrased for the guys whos dates didn't dress right).

eta: it also has to be able to be shipped to Japan since thats where we are stationed right now (Im not asking much huh?)

[Momma Aimee]

Hey ladies! Maybe you all can help me out.. Im 28 weeks pregnant right now and DH is in the Marines. Im due around the same time as his Marine Corps Ball (which is required for him to go to) so Im trying to find a modest maternity formal gown.. I haven't found anything. Someone suggested finding someone to make me one but then Im looking at a lot more money than I can afford. Anyone have any ideas where I can find one?

My requirements are: It has to have sleeves, it has to be high cut in front (and in back) and full length.. The ball is formal/semi formal but Id like to err on the side of causion and get a more formal dress (Ive been to several and I was very embarrased for the guys whos dates didn't dress right).

eta: it also has to be able to be shipped to Japan since thats where we are stationed right now (Im not asking much huh?)
where HAVE you looked? so we don't re-suggest antyhing?

How about a dress with a shwall cover? I wore a lace shwall over my wedding gown, the whole time, and that was nice -- it would "cover" a less high back or longer slevaes and look sytleish

A

[GooeyRN]

I second a shawl, OR a maternity jacket to wear over a not modest enough dress. If you choose a black dress, it may not be as hard to find a black jacket to cover more shoulder, arm, and back area.

Finding maternity clothes that are modest sucks! Both times I was pregnant in the summer all I could find was sleeveless stuff. I looked frumpy and was hot all summer b/c I won't go sleeveless.

[imnottelling]

Firstly, maternity in the summer online is pretty easy if you go to the outlet/clearance sections of many bigger online retailers that sell maternity -- you usually can find decent coverage for even more decent prices :D

About formalwear: I had the same issue. My brother in law got married at the end of my eighth month. I ended up spending a bit to put together an outfit of 2 pieces: http://www.prettymematernity.com/index.php/special-occasion/c_17.html
I got a Japanese Weekend ballgown skirt from here (which I can wear even when not pregnant as it's a stretchy panel) and put a top I bought locally with some satin trimming....it wasn't cheap, but it's mix and matchable enough to get my money's worth.
This site above has some dresses too as well as a crop jacket that looks nice which can easily add coverage to a sleeveless dress...I found them to be very efficient in getting my order processed.
Ebay sometimes has things too. I almost bought a 2 piece maternity outfit, but decided the size wasn't right (it was sleeveless, but I could have easily added sleeves since the skirt would be quite long).

And as far as the idea of getting a black dress and putting a black jacket on top, I think that's harder than getting a black dress and adding a bit of color on top which probably is easier to match...

Good luck!

[blessedNjoyful]

Hello! My name is Leah. My husband, Scott, and I have been married for 8 years. We have 3 precious sons (6, 4.5, and 22 mo) so far and another baby blessing due in early November! I've always tried to dress conservatively (according to the world) but was really convicted to start dressing differently 4-5 years ago. It wasn't until 2.5 years ago that my husband finally understood why I wanted to dress differently and agreed. I've always loved to wear dresses, skirts, and jumpers so moving to "dresses only" was an easy step for me. I do wear pants and shorts to sleep in but always wear a dress or skirt otherwise. I just love looking like a lady. :)

Having had 3 sons so far we have had the opportunity to talk about modesty and why mama chooses to wear dresses and skirts. I'd be interested to hear what other mama's of sons allow them to wear. If I'm not going to let my future daughters wear shorts should I also remove them from my son's wardrobes? And what about going shirtless?

I look forward to keeping up with all the mamas here!

[heidirk]

For me, I've always abmired the eastern tradition of a tunic and pants. skirts never end up being very modest for me, being tall and long legged, anything made to be ankle length is tea length (midcalf) on me anyway. And don't get me started on maternity stuff, either. Being tall, long legged, broad shouldered AND busty all at thr same time means that IF I find any dresses, they are NOT modest on me. On the off chance I find something appropriate, it is DEFINATELY not on sale! You guys are very lucky! :D

I actually found a maternity option for a skirt that I thought was rather inventive! Y'know those tube dresses with the flowy shirts, and no straps or sleeves? they always looked so cool, and I knew I'd never be able to wear one. I got inspired and decided to see if one would fit me as a skirt! The stretchy panel fits nicely over my preggo belly, and hips, and it's long enough, but still cool! Now if I could only find more of them. . . . :p

[Momma Aimee]

Hello! My name is Leah. My husband, Scott, and I have been married for 8 years. We have 3 precious sons (6, 4.5, and 22 mo) so far and another baby blessing due in early November! I've always tried to dress conservatively (according to the world) but was really convicted to start dressing differently 4-5 years ago. It wasn't until 2.5 years ago that my husband finally understood why I wanted to dress differently and agreed. I've always loved to wear dresses, skirts, and jumpers so moving to "dresses only" was an easy step for me. I do wear pants and shorts to sleep in but always wear a dress or skirt otherwise. I just love looking like a lady. :)

Having had 3 sons so far we have had the opportunity to talk about modesty and why mama chooses to wear dresses and skirts. I'd be interested to hear what other mama's of sons allow them to wear. If I'm not going to let my future daughters wear shorts should I also remove them from my son's wardrobes? And what about going shirtless?

I look forward to keeping up with all the mamas here!

nak

i have never though much about it

:o

most of my own desire / need is what i feel God putting on me. also biblical also the sacanity of marriage and saving myself for DH.

I DO agree the kids need to dress appropitly

hummmmmm

:o I let the 2 year old run naked in the hose in our yard (no one can see our yard).

I will be intrested in what more experience moms have to say

[imnottelling]

I let my sons wear shorts, but then again my oldest is only 3 :)
When he is about 10 or so, I think shorts will be fazed out; my husband doesn't wear shorts (except to sleep)...but at this young an age, I don't see a reason to impose that...

[momma_unlimited]

I've been thinking about dressing more modestly.

The thing is, I have a very strong desire to dress BEAUTIFULLY. The Bible talks about how Solomon in all his glory didn't wasn't arrayed as beautifully as the flowers... I think, my dress should point to the royalty of my heavenly father, the fact that I am of worth to Him and an ambassador to the world. I don't see how dressing in dull colors or clothes that strive to hide the form of the one who created me is very spiritual at all. I get very frustrated because I can't find beautiful dresses that are functional for a mom of two small boys with nursing access!

I liked this thread- I am thinking of going more middle eastern with tunic and pants. The other day dh saw some Indian girls with long braided hair and flowing silky tunics and he commented on how beautiful they looked. When I go to the store or out in public, I see so many women, modest and immodest, who just plain look... unattractive. Either too dolled up and self-conscious or too plain and, especially, I think women should wear colors that complement the coloring God blessed them with. What do you think? Aren't we examples of our Creator's unparalled artistry? Not that how we look should become a matter of obsessive thought, as in "vanity".

Honestly, I'm starting to think that modesty is more of an attitude- the opposite of vanity- in which you do not spend inordinate amounts of time considering what you look like. Also, as the opposite of vanity, it does not seek to show off, whether that be vaunting your curves or bare skin around, or make you feel like there is anything shameful about the human body. I feel like I should strive for modesty in my attitude, and externally for beauty and grace. With a heart that is in the right place and a vision for the beauty my Creator took such pains to imbue His creation with how can I go wrong?

[imnottelling]

You have a great attitude toward modesty, IMO...what I find for nursing is to forego one piece dresses (alternatively, you can add in side zippers) -- I dress in 2 piece outfits, a top and skirt..the top is usually button down and I wear a shell underneath so that I am completely covered when nursing (I open from the bottom, so baby covers up that area, the other side is still covered, and the shell covers the top).

[momma_unlimited]

Good idea- skirts and shirt layers.

Now I just need to find cozy layers to keep my legs warm this winter. We go outside a lot! And I don't like nylons.

[imnottelling]

Leggings?

[Liquesce]

Good idea- skirts and shirt layers.

Now I just need to find cozy layers to keep my legs warm this winter. We go outside a lot! And I don't like nylons.

A good set of snug thermal underwear works great under a full length skirt. Nice boots, aside from being practical, hide anything of them that might show beneath the hemline.

[heidirk]

Momma Unlimited- I like your ideas, lets hear it for women who think! :joy:

I think it's interesting that your location is Amish country NY, bc I'm in amish country PA, and I think they're a good example for what you were saying. They make it a point to be so 'other' that you can't help but stare, I don't really think that embodies a modest attitude at all.

And I am cold in skirts for the winter, so it's jeans and long sweaters for me!
Mmmm. . .thick socks, tights, warm layers. . .I can hardly wait for fall! :D

I have to agree that all beautiful things magnify our Creator, so I guess we each have to find our own balance, YKWIM?

[momma_unlimited]

They make it a point to be so 'other' that you can't help but stare, I don't really think that embodies a modest attitude at all.

Right! Now I am guessing that its become so cultural that they don't even think much of it... so they probably are modest for the most part. But, I think the original people who went out of their way to make a big point of being simple (rather an oxymoron) suffered from some "false modesty". To me, it's not "simple" to legislate a handful of colors; it may even be inconvenient. What if another color was on sale but you were stuck buying the "right" color? Simple just means... don't spend too much time worrying about it or trying to be "special"- just let it be a natural reflection of what you are comfortable in, what complements your coloring, and what conveys that you are an ambassador/daughter of a Creator who sought to make His female creation lovely & pure.

Not to downplay or insult people who believe that only certain colors are appropriate. Most cultures believe this to some degree (weddings attire, funeral attire are examples).

My mother, a very "modest" woman, spends at least 1.5 hours every morning getting ready. She's not stuck up, but grew up in poverty and believes she will be treated better if she has every hair in place. But, I still think its rather vain...

[moonshoes]

I think it's interesting that your location is Amish country NY, bc I'm in amish country PA, and I think they're a good example for what you were saying. They make it a point to be so 'other' that you can't help but stare, I don't really think that embodies a modest attitude at all.



hmmm...sorry, I have to disagree here. Maybe it is everyone else that is so 'other' that they "have to" stare. I think it is really self-centered to think that the Amish sit around thinking about how to be "different" - seriously. And to claim they don't have a modest attitude -:scratch

And also it is important to realize that many women are dressing modestly for different reasons. Some follow religious conventions that may preclude them from wearing pants, and some feel personally convicted to dress in a certain way. So what if someone thinks I look frumpy? The person next to them might think I am immodest.:shrug

Nobody here covers, and I mean nobody, but I feel personally convicted to do so. Does that make me immodest because it draws so much attention? Should I not do it because I don't fit in? Let's just try not to judge one another.:love

[momma_unlimited]

Does that make me immodest because it draws so much attention? Should I not do it because I don't fit in?

I think the difference is, if you are "flaunting" modesty or wearing "unconventional" clothing to make some point of your spirituality, then it would seem.. vain.

If you are dressing in a certain way because it is comfortable, inspiring, or beautiful to *you*, or because it is cultural and normal to you, and you are not obsessing over it, than it can totally be modest, even if it's weird to other people.

I really don't take issues with *followers*. They are often just trying to do the right thing and are happy not to have to decide what that is on their own, or else they are truly inspired to follow an example they believe is good. I take issue more with originators who try to legislate the expression of someone else's spirituality. Inspire me to be less self conscious, not to be very conscious of what I put on so that I feel like I am "bad" if I don't wear it!

[annettemarie]

I don't know. I find the idea that the Amish flaunt their modesty to be somewhat absurd.

Those weird "modest" bathing suits, however, I totally think are modest to a fault.

[momma_unlimited]

And while I'm on my soapbox...

I even think that it is dangerous to go out and condemn people mentally for their skanky clothing. It would be far more "spiritual" to notice a woman in immodest clothing and pray for protection for her in her naivete or brazenness, than to put her down. Right? I wish my mother had taught me to do that, rather than to look down on women showing their cleavage.

[momma_unlimited]

I don't know. I find the idea that the Amish flaunt their modesty to be somewhat absurd.

Just to clarify I was not thinking of the Amish when I mentioned flaunting modesty. I was thinking more of some women I know who do not have cultural reasons to dress differently, but do it to make a point and have a rather sour attitude towards women they consider immodest.

[annettemarie]

Oh, I know. I think I was piecing together several posts in my mind and picturing flaunting Amish. I just couldn't see it. :lol

[bmcneal]

I try to dress modestly. I don't really wear sleeveless, I only *like* wearing ankle/calf length skirts (I've been wearing pajama pants, but that's only because they have the drawstrings. For some reason even though I'm "showing" a little, my skirts are mostly too big now?) I've been trying to find dresses like the "teen princess dress" here (http://fldsdress.com/clothing.php?Cat=Girls) but they don't have them in my size. I just like how modest they are, and how they aren't all "Here I am. Come have a look." I haven't seen anywhere to get them, and I don't have a sewing machine, so if any of you know where I could get one, please let me know. :)

I have been wanting to cover my head for some time now.

[Liquesce]

Those weird "modest" bathing suits, however, I totally think are modest to a fault.

:shrug: I've heard the same said by calf-length skirt wearers about women in ankle-length skirts, non-hair-coverers about women who cover their hair, hair coverers about women whose hair covers don't cover ears or neck, and so on ... I'm a little wary of the whole "my modesty is ok, and yours is too much" thing.

I've been trying to find dresses like the "teen princess dress" here (http://fldsdress.com/clothing.php?Cat=Girls) but they don't have them in my size.

Maybe not exactly what you're looking for, but you might try something from here (http://www.ringgerclothing.com/). :)

[annettemarie]

:shrug: I've heard the same said by calf-length skirt wearers about women in ankle-length skirts, non-hair-coverers about women who cover their hair, hair coverers about women whose hair covers don't cover ears or neck, and so on ... I'm a little wary of the whole "my modesty is ok, and yours is too much" thing.


That was actually my point. ;) We all have our own opinions, but I don't think we can apply our own motivations and convictions to others.

[Liquesce]

That was actually my point. ;) We all have our own opinions, but I don't think we can apply our own motivations and convictions to others.

I'm not above missing something in someone's tone, apparently ... bummer, 'cause I was looking forward to getting all soapbox-y. :wink:p

[annettemarie]

I'm not above missing something in someone's tone, apparently ... bummer, 'cause I was looking forward to getting all soapbox-y. :wink:p

:lol Your pictures in your signature are absolutely beautiful, btw!

[Liquesce]

Oh, thank you. :love

[Kidzaplenty]

Thank you for that link. I love modest dresses. My biggest problem is, of course, nursing and wearing them. I am going to have to make my own, I guess (if I ever get my sewing machine fixed). Or if I can find any that are nursing dresses (I know they make them, but finding them and affording them are my problem).

Oh, well! For now, I will stick to my skirts.

[annettemarie]

Mennonite cape dresses are great, because they're made for nursing. I'm actually wearing an older style Motherhood nursing dress today, and it reminds me of the cape-style dresses.

I generally wear tops and skirts when I am nursing.

[damona]

going back a few posts to the how to keep your legs warm in winter bit... i bought a couple pairs of pettipants at the renaissance faire last summer, one is cotton and one is silk. they work great in summer to keep your legs from getting chafed and in winter they help to keep you warm! they have an elastic waist and the ankles and are kind of blousy, not form fitting like leggings. of course, i have long legs, so i usually end up with the "ankles" just below my knees!

i also double up skirts when it's chilly. i have a bunch of those ankle length, crinkled cotton skirts, so i just put one under the other like petticoats.

[heidirk]

That was actually my point. ;) We all have our own opinions, but I don't think we can apply our own motivations and convictions to others.

I had a feeling this would come up, and rightly so! :thumb I'm not judgeing the Amish. My dad grew up plain mennonite, and so did my Grandmother on my mom's side. The knew and worked with a lot of Amish families, so they are in a position to know and understand attitudes, etc.

It's funny because they judge each other on their standards of plain dress, with some Amish thinking the Mennonites are not modest, and some Mennonites thinking the Amish are affectatious in their modesty. My dad said that how plain you were was definately a point of pride among church members, and that they did look down on the English for their 'wild' ways.

Neither my father or my grandmother joined their churches, partially because of these attitudes. When my mother was in elementary school, the plain girls would tease my mom and her sisters because their skirts were too short, and said they could smell their crotches because of it.

So, yeah, there's some prideful flaunting going on there.


On a different topic- I found a promising site for nursing dresses, I think it's in my favorites, let me go see. . .

http://nursingmamas.com/e_commerce/cart.php?m=product_detail&p=6230

There it is!


And Moonshoes- No, it's not flaunting to follow your convictions, even when noone shares them. That's strength! I'm not going to do or not do certain things (like swear, for instance) just because I would be conspicuous otherwise, I just do not swear, period. It does make me stick out, but it doesn't mean I'm flaunting my nonswearingness! :lol

[tricia80]

I am a conservative mennonite convert... I used to dress immodestly even though i thought it was quite modest at the time... I wear a full cape dress and a headcovering and yes i do get stares even though i live in mennonite country ( i used to live in the city and that was way worse).. I feel people can stare all they want.. I am letting my light shine.. by looking at me and talking with me they know i am a christian and I follow my bible and church accordingly. Some days it would be easier to just throw on a pair of pants and go but that is not what the Lord has led me to do and i personally am convicted that women are to dress different than men.. That is MY opinion.

At the same time I will NOT degrade another persons attire they so choose or at least attempt not to (yes i am human). I will actually pray for that person and hope that they are kept safe especially with all that is out in the world. Personally if you are flaunting ur figure or whatever u are looking for attention and definately in the wrong way. Again that is MY opinion. I don't force my opinion on anyone. I have lived on both sides of the fence and this stems from MY experiences.

Some amish and mennonite churches are just modern churches with the word amish and mennonite in them. And some are just culturally mennonite. There are tons of mennonites out this way with varying views. it is too hard to generalize them all because the beliefs maybe the same but the applications from the bible are different.

Ok i have no idea what i am writing anymore or if its even beneficial at this point.. but hey its typed up now.. :lol

[heidirk]

No! I understand what you're saying! I did try to specify that this was my family and area and experience. . . HTH :innocent

[intorainbowz]

Backing up a bit, I find that for formal wear, it is easiest to combine a shirt and skirt. When I was pregnant I found a lovely long sleve crepe blouse at maternity. Problem was that it had spagetti straps in the liner tank. (WHO can wear spagetti straps while pregnant and not have their bra show. I mean I needed the industrial strength bra.) I bought a coordinating blouse with cap sleves, which fit my definition of modesty and sewed it into the blouse. After the formal, I unsewed it, and had a cute top. I love mixing and matching things to make something immodest modest.

For me, modest does not include being frumpy or not calling attention to myself with my clothes. I'm LDS, and others have described our clothing requirements. I LOVE LOVE LOVE to be fashionable. I adore looking at fashing magazines and figuring out how to combine things to make them modest, and still fashionable.

Oh, and I'm in love with those tunics linked above.

I've really thought a lot about getting one of these style suits http://www.bodykini.com/ or http://www.splashgearusa.com/ I'm ok wearing a one piece and skirt, but my skin is so pale, I'm very limited by the sun. If I had one of those suits... I could play outside in the water all day. Plus... not having to shave every day I'm on vacay (what is that? I forgot) would be a HUGE plus.

[bmcneal]

I have a question about head coverings. What do those of you who wear them use? I purchased a head covering from our church, but DH would like for me to only wear it during liturgy or times of prayer, so I need something more day-to-day. I've looked at scarves, but I'm not sure how to wrap/wear them, so any advice or suggestions would be appreciated.

TIA!

[imnottelling]

I have a question about head coverings. What do those of you who wear them use? I purchased a head covering from our church, but DH would like for me to only wear it during liturgy or times of prayer, so I need something more day-to-day. I've looked at scarves, but I'm not sure how to wrap/wear them, so any advice or suggestions would be appreciated.

TIA!
These are pretied bandannas which are pretty simple to wear -- they have elastic on the bottom, and tails from the side so you don't have to tie them.
http://www.covermyhair.com/index.php?main_page=index&cPath=69&zenid=8c6926d72443a22471c49d8347d48aed
http://coveryourhair.com/WomensPreTiedBandannas.html

Alternatively, here is a great guide to tie scarves:
http://www.tznius.com/cgi-bin/tying.pl

http://happyheadwraps.com/ looks cute, but I haven't tried them out myself.

[moonshoes]

speaking of coveringings...is there a tribe/thread specifically for head-covering mamas?

[bmcneal]

I don't know, but that would be nice if there was :)

[annettemarie]

If you're talking about religious covering, you may want to check in Spirituality. If there's not a tribe, you could start one.

[imnottelling]

I don't know, but that would be nice if there was :)

Feel free to start one :D

[phathui5]

If I'm not going to let my future daughters wear shorts should I also remove them from my son's wardrobes? And what about going shirtless?


My boys do wear shorts in the summer. It wouldn't be practical for them to wear pants in the heat. In that same vein, dd wears lighter dresses in the summer so she's not baking either.

I do let my younger two go shirtless, but not the older two.

[phathui5]

Mennonite cape dresses are great, because they're made for nursing. I'm actually wearing an older style Motherhood nursing dress today, and it reminds me of the cape-style dresses.

I generally wear tops and skirts when I am nursing.

Last week we were at the house of a woman from our church (we go to a Mennonite church). Most people there wear store bought clothes, but she wears the cape dresses. I was so surprised when I saw her start nursing the baby, because I couldn't tell her dress had any openings.

I have a question about head coverings. What do those of you who wear them use? I purchased a head covering from our church, but DH would like for me to only wear it during liturgy or times of prayer, so I need something more day-to-day. I've looked at scarves, but I'm not sure how to wrap/wear them, so any advice or suggestions would be appreciated.

I use a regular bandana all the time. I just wear it tied in the back, with my hair up in a ponytail or twist underneath.

[simonsmama]

I consider myself pretty modest. I usually wear jeans (or capris)and a nice shirt with sleeves that go to the elbow or longer. I like ankle length skirts, but I'm such a tomboy that I don't feel very comfortable in them. I do wear them to church and such. I personally feel its sad the way some women dress so immodestly, showing off almost everything. I fell like it's sort of against the feminist movement as it's like I'm objectifying my body (but you can't). I dunno, am I making any sense? It just seems weird to me. How can you wear a super low cut shirt and expect men NOT to stare? I mean, come on. We all know how men think:D

[Momma Aimee]

I fell like it's sort of against the feminist movement as it's like I'm objectifying my body (but you can't)
ITA

[rainbowmoon]

I have been dressing modestly for a few years now (meaning I 99% of the time don't go in public with my arms/legs showing, though I will wear capris and short sleeved t's on occasion I try to keep covered as much as possible now days) I do wear sandals out and I wear tanks and stuff around the house. not sure how it happened but this is where I'm at! (I'm mostly identifying with agnostic pantheist beliefs these days, so no religious reasons) I just hate my skin showing in public or drawing attention to my body in anyway! though I have gone in a jacuzzi (I have a pretty modest swimsuit though and only at night!)

my kids are mostly little nudists in the summertime. (we are in AZ) I have no rules for them. it's just something I'm comfortable with for me. I have only talked about this to one person IRL who actually noticed and asked me!

I really would love some tips on flattering clothes that cover though (I hate frump!) I am into gauzy cotton but headed back east mid week until Jan or later. so am going to be needing some warm stuff!

[gilamama]

http://www.yanaeverywhere.com/

this is a great site for modest nursing clothing.

[heidirk]

I had a great idea for nursing clothes, since the 'pull-up-your-shirt' thing exposes WAAAYYYY too much boob for my comfort- not to mention belly, sides and back. And it's COLD!

So, I'm going to get a bella band and wear it over my jeans/whatever, and pull it all the way up to my bra. THat way, I'll be covered, and warm! It'll also help the whole 'I'm-tall-and-none-of-my-shirts-are-long-enough' thing. I think the whole effect will be flattering, like a longer camisole under all my shirts, but without extra layers or straps! :joy:

Whad'ya all think? :D

[Moonprysm]

I did that with an old tank top that didn't fit anymore. I cut the top part off and just used it like a belly band. But eventually I preferred to wear a nursing tank under whatever shirt as I felt my boobs were better covered with the combo.

[heidirk]

On most nursing clothes, my boobs are either A. too big to fit through the holes, or B. too low to hike up through the holes.

/Thank goodness I at least found nursing bras in my right size this time!

[HennyPenny]

hello! I'm a modest dresser here =) I cover my hair in public (not always at home b/c I think a head needs to breath! and my husband likes it out sometimes), I wear long skirts/dresses and no sleeveless or cleavage showing or tight shirts. I double layer on top if possible and my clothes are never tight or revealing in any way.

You could wear a longer skirt under the dresses if they're too short.


I do this!! people may think I'm crazy I don't know. but i have a couple of old dresses I just love but they are way too short so I match them with a coordinating solid colored skirt and wear it underneath for a layered look. I am very comfortable with this as it's very loose and also very easy to either wear in hot or cold weather. I can layer more tights and knee socks if it is cold. e or just sandals if it is warm.

[Liquesce]

I do this!! people may think I'm crazy I don't know. but i have a couple of old dresses I just love but they are way too short so I match them with a coordinating solid colored skirt and wear it underneath for a layered look.

I buy shorter dresses to wear as shirts. :o I just hem them up to mid-thigh or above the knee if they fall below.

[HennyPenny]

I was posting some links on another thread and wanted to share them here. These are Christian links:

http://www.modestclothes.com/simple/articles/tips-for-christian-ladies-new-to-plain-and-simple-dressing.html

http://e-menno.org/headcvr.htm

http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/239780/why_i_wear_a_headcovering_a_christian.html


I'm actually bummed we didn't meet in person when I lived in Maryland (AA county) I always saw your posts about church searching and what not and read them b/c I too was searching. I have no clue if you recognize my name or not lol... but anyhow I noticed your covering on you siggie the other day (I still lurk the Maryland tribe boards b/c I make it back often enough for special events and what not) and I was like "yippy! Im not alone!" haha and now I realize there really are lots of covering mamas on here. how nice! I really thought I was the only christian covering mama here!

by any chance the lady you were talked about who nursed her baby in the cape dress, does she have two little girls and a baby boy? someone not long ago from balti visited my old church in Goshen, Md and I have forgotten her name!! it's right there on the tip of my tongue! just curious if it's the same family. anyhow I know they were starting a home bible study but we moved before we were able to attend.... anyhow if it's not this person just ignore this part ;)

[HennyPenny]

re: boys "dress codes"


my son has standards as well as my daughter. He can wear shorts but they have to be loose and below the knee. and not out on certain occasions out of respect - like church or what not. around the house is fine. and if it's REALLY hot going out is fine too. no tight t shirts and with weird symbols on them. and I prefer him to wear button down shirts b/c they are easy functional, hide stains really well! (plaid) and look a bit more modest in a lot of ways.

[phathui5]

by any chance the lady you were talked about who nursed her baby in the cape dress, does she have two little girls and a baby boy?

Sounds like Patty?

[Beeblebrox]

I have been dressing more modestly. Wearing more skirts, tights, long sleeved or looser fitting shirts (no tank tops out) and covering my head. I'm pretty flexible with my head covering. I do allow hair to show, just as long as I have something over the top part. For me it's not about hiding my hair but a deliberate action I do that brings me close to God and gives me reminders throughout the day to talk with Him.

On that subject, my friend gave me a bag of bandannas of every color imaginable! I normally just tie it back underneath a ponytail, but I was wondering if there are websites that show different ways to wear and tie bandannas.

[smeisnotapirate]

There is a tribe for coverers, over in Spirituality.

:wave

Jewish convert here. I've been really drawn towards covering and modest dress. I think it's lovely and elegant, etc. I just can't get past giving up some of my favorite articles of clothing (I know, it's so silly :eyesroll). What I've been doing is whenever I buy clothing now, I only buy modest clothing (3/4 sleeves, skirts below the knee, covered collar bone). Now, so much of my wardrobe is LOVELY modest stuff :love that I find myself really enjoying dressing modestly.

For me, the hardest is the high necklines. I have a sensory thing with my neck, and I hate wearing t-shirts and other collared shirts unless they're fitted (like a turtleneck), so I find myself wearing v-necks with a modest tank underneath it. Not 100% kosher, but I just can't wear crew neck shirts. Come winter, though, I'm all over the turtlenecks!

:topic
Heidirk, how you feeling?? I been on the same threads as you recently! Let me know if you need food or anything when your LO comes. :D

[heidirk]

Hey thanks! When I read back over some of my threads, I realise how up-and-down I seem, but that's just the way it's been going. I feel fine, but I'd happily give birth any time at this point! What I'm really trying to do is just not worry about what I can't do anything about! I always have that moment of panic when something changes, but I've really been trying to focus on getting the house clean for the baby, and taking a back seat so God can take care of me! :innocent It's hard to do.

For right now, our material needs are met. I have yet to hear back from Medicaid about our application. And DH slid his car off the road on Saturday, and it needs some major repairs. Again, all I can do is call medicaid and make sure I did the application properly, and wait. I can't drive the car more safely for DH, so there we are. :eyesroll

I will definately let you know if we hit a point where we need more help, thank you so much for offering! :hug



I am glad the weather has cooled down. I had a huge problem staying modest during this pregnancy, I was so HOT all the time. Literally I felt like I would suffocate, so I tried to stay home so I could wear as little as possible. What's funny is, as my belly grew, DS started trying to pull my shirts down to cover it! I don;t have a huge around-the-house maternity wardrobe, so sometimes I just had to say, 'I'm sorry baby, I know mama's belly's sticking out, her shirt is just not going to stretch that far today.' I think it's cool that even my 2 yo son knows that certain parts of mamma should not be exposed!

[averysmomma05]

I try to dress modest and trying to get better at it. I am going to subby

[HennyPenny]

Sounds like Patty?

yes PATTY! that is it... and rueben I think? (sp maybe?)

sorry I didn't see this reply sooner. they are such a nice couple.

[herdingkittens]

hi there. great thread. i have a question for all of you modest mothers.

i would like to only wear dresses for a variety of reasons:
1. dresses make me feel feminine
2. dresses make me look feminine
3. i am not good at matching. :o i have a good supply of clothes, but many of them don't go together (skirts and tops).
4. i think i would look more "put together" in a dress
5. i'd always be ready for church at a moments notice!
6. i can throw one on ...little effort

the only problem is nursing! i am feeding two right now, and cannot seem to find any nice dresses to nurse in. the budget is small and i have zero time to sew at the moment. any ideas? does anyonew have a style of dress that they LOVE nursing in? know of any good online nursing clothing resale shops?

THANKS!!!

btw, my husband likes me to wear flattering styles (i.e. no jumpers!).

[hollyvangogh]

btw, my husband likes me to wear flattering styles (i.e. no jumpers!).

While I understand the sentiment (and wearing my jumper makes me feel a bit like a stereotype or something) my husband LOVES me jumper. He thinks it's cute/pretty. :p

[Liquesce]

He thinks it's cute/pretty.

I think so too, but not having the potential to be a husband my comment probably doesn't count for much in this respect. :lol

[Kidzaplenty]

I really like jumpers too! :D

However, I have to admit that they are not very flattering to the feminine body. If you are going to flatter the curves, you need a waiste line. Skirts and shirts are the only thing that I have found to accomplish this while nursing.

The way to do your wardrob for skirts is to just find a solid color, flattering, easy to nurse in top that will match multiple skirts.

But if anyone knows where to find flattering dresses that are easy to discreatly nurse in, I am interested.

[Liquesce]

But if anyone knows where to find flattering dresses that are easy to discreatly nurse in, I am interested.

Hmm ... I have a jersey-knit mock wrap dress (this one (http://www.lanebryantcatalog.com/pagebuilder/lane_bryant_catalog_product_page?item=850019&source=8LBFRG&tid=CG%20Google&ci_src=14110944&ci_sku=29-460-%20850019-66-24W) ... one of the dresses I bought to shorten into a long top :o) that, with a tank under it, works beautifully for nursing ... the crossover wrap front in the somewhat stretchy fabric is so easy to pull aside or even just out to let the baby's head rest behind it.

The specific dress may not be what most people are looking for length-wise, and they seem to be sold out of all but the higher plus sizes anyway, but just for the *type* that I think fits the definition.

[herdingkittens]

ack! I hope I have not offended anyone! Actually, I would love to live in jumpers, myself, but I have to compromise! :wink It's hard to find something that suits my age and style that isn't revealing or too short, etc.

[ancoda]

Hi :wave
I consider myself pretty modest. I am another LDS mom. I wear loose knit pants and longer sleeved t-shirts and blouses. All of my skirts are at least mid-calf and most are ankle length.
I am hoping for a sewing machine for Christmases so I can learn to make some of my own clothes, because everything that is at all modest now seems to always be so expensive.
As far as my sons dressing modestly. They can wear shorts, but they need to be to the knees. They have to have sleeves on their shirts. They wear shirts when we are out in public, including to swim (though this is becoming a point of contention with my 6 year old.)

[Kidzaplenty]

ack! I hope I have not offended anyone! Actually, I would love to live in jumpers, myself, but I have to compromise! :wink It's hard to find something that suits my age and style that isn't revealing or too short, etc.
Not offended here! :D

I love jumpers. But I must admit that they can make me look more rounded rather that shapely. And since I am already a bit more round than I would like, I save the jumpers for when I am pg, or those "instant dress" moments when I jump out of bed only long enough to run Hubby to the bus before crawling back under the covers. :love

[hollyvangogh]

Not offended here! :D



Me either! I totally got your point. And if I wasn't pregnant DH might not like a jumper over other outfits as much as he does. I agree with the PP who said other dresses and skirt/shirt outfits that show you have a waist are more flattering.

[Mimi]

Oh I don't wear trousers! I did when I was pregnant, but now it's all skirts,
I prefer to dress "proper".. :)
(don't want to offend anyone, if you like to wear trousers that's your thing, i personally find them uncomfortable anyway :D )

[heidirk]

Ohhh, see, I love wearing trousers, but for me it's more of a sensory thing. Sometimes in skirts, I feel too 'light' and it makes me anxious. Same reason I prefer sweaters, I think!

'course, in the winter I can wear tights under skirts, so that's better.


For coordinations sake, most of my bottom peices, be they skirts, or trousers, are solid/neutral colors, and most of my tops are prints/textured, so it's easier to pull together an outfit that way.

[bmcneal]

I have a bunch of skirts that are pretty thin. I don't *think* they look like summer ones (although I think they technically *are* spring/summer styles). Right now, money is kind of tight. I was wondering if leggings underneath them would work, or if it would look tacky (if you could see them? I don't know if you could or not.) or basically what you ladies' opinions are. DH said I can get some denim skirts come end of November/beginning of December, so if you think it would work but not really well, that would be alright too.

[ldsmom06]

I think I might have posted before but I don't remember. I am another LDS mom and I dress modestly and actually prefer to wear long skirts instead of pants but cannot find any long skirts and dresses anywhere and all mine are too small since I am 65lbs heavier since having my lo's.

Does anyone know where I can get some? I really would like a couple long jean skirts and a few plain colored ones.

I seem to feel like a better wife and mother while dressing in long skirts because it makes me feel more femime(I can't remember how to spell it). If that makes any sense.

TIA!

[ancoda]

Does anyone know where I can get some? I really would like a couple long jean skirts and a few plain colored ones.

I seem to feel like a better wife and mother while dressing in long skirts because it makes me feel more femime(I can't remember how to spell it). If that makes any sense.

TIA!
There are several cute long denim ones on this site (http://www.denimskirts.com/index.html)

soft cotton ones here (http://www.mapleclothing.com/).
Love most all the clothes here at hannah lise (http://www.hannahlise.com/default.aspx)

[Liquesce]

Does anyone know where I can get some? I really would like a couple long jean skirts and a few plain colored ones.

Hi. :) I don't know your budget ... most places I know online are a little higher priced than I'd like myself, but I'll share anyway.

Devora Fashions (http://www.devorafashions.com/womens.html)
Ringger Clothing (http://www.ringgerclothing.com/shop/shop.php)
Style J Ebay Store (http://stores.ebay.com/Style-J) -- really good for a wide size range of denim skirts
Modest World (http://www.modestworld.com/)
al-Mujalbaba (http://www.al-mujalbaba.com/skirts.html) -- just basic, solid color, low-maintenance, stretchy-waisted skirts
Artizara (http://www.artizara.com/long-skirt-modest-skirt-ankle-length-skirt-Islamic-skirt-s/38.htm)
Shukr (http://www.shukronline.com/womens-skirts.html?sf=1&sd=a#sortblock) -- this is usually where I go first ... not cheap, but well made, generally all natural fibers, and with few exceptions generally on the more simple side. They should be updating their stock for fall soon though.

[magstphil]

I have been dieing for long denim skirts too!

subbing :love

[heidirk]

I have a bunch of skirts that are pretty thin. I don't *think* they look like summer ones (although I think they technically *are* spring/summer styles). Right now, money is kind of tight. I was wondering if leggings underneath them would work, or if it would look tacky (if you could see them? I don't know if you could or not.) or basically what you ladies' opinions are. DH said I can get some denim skirts come end of November/beginning of December, so if you think it would work but not really well, that would be alright too.

I don't think leggings would look strange at all. from a style point of veiw, leggins are comeing back anyway! :p

[smeisnotapirate]

Liquesce, the Artizara site is GORGEOUS! I just love the section of formal wear. :dropjaw Wow.

As always Shukr has great skirts, and cheaper than I thought!

[darling_deedee]

I'm not a mom (yet) but I'm a modest dresser - head covering gal, too.
There's something very feminine to me about dressing modestly.
I won't lie, I love (modest) blue jeans. I turned some of 'em into skirts, though.
I'm a garden variety Presbyterian and the only gal in my congregation who covers which is hard sometimes... I get a lot of ugly looks and comments from people when they realise it isn't a fashion statement! Oh well. It has nothing to do with them. Its something I feel convicted about.

:D

At any rate. I'm excited to find a group online of other modest gals. Do any of you cover your head?

-Deedee

[smeisnotapirate]

Hey, Deedee! :wave

Lots of us headcover as well. There's a thread in Spirituality (don't know if you have access to that forum yet) where we talk specifically about that.

What kind of headcovering do you wear?

[darling_deedee]

Hey there!

I'll have a look and see if I can enter the Spirituality Thread.

My head covering is similar to this one:
http://www.tznius.com/cgi-bin/bun.pl

I'm so excited to meet other ladies who cover. :D

-Deedee

[joiedevivre184]

*waves* i'm a modest dressing not-yet-mama. I'm not yet skirts only, but i never wear shorts or tank tops or anything very revealing. I'm having the hardest time finding long skirts, especially jean or corduroy. I've even looked in thrift/second hand shops! It's very frustrating! I'm also starting headcovering. I have a friend that is making me some after the holidays. (i really love the headcoverings on www.garlandsofgrace.com)

[Effervescence]

Mennonite cape dresses are great, because they're made for nursing. I'm actually wearing an older style Motherhood nursing dress today, and it reminds me of the cape-style dresses.

I generally wear tops and skirts when I am nursing.

Is there a link to a picture?

[Faliciagayle]

Wanted to post a link to a modest workout clothing site: http://skirtsports.com/shop/new.cfm


probably not modest enough for some, but I have a hard time finding modest workout gear and the Tough Girl outfit from this site is just perfect for me at this moment in time.

I just wish I could afford it. :lol


eta: not all of their stuff is modest, so be aware :)

[brittneyscott]

Wow... lots of great links here. I'm starting to re-assess the wardrobe here. I've been known to wear things I definitely shouldn't but lately I'm not wanting to dress that way anymore. I can't take the plunge into some of the very modest clothes though. I'm just not sure I'd be comfortable in some of them although I'm no longer comfortable in my current wardrobe. Finding modest clothes (something not advertising my figure IMO) isn't easy either as I'm very full figured. I'm fairly small in size too but with a huge bottom and extra large top. I look like Barbie for lack of a better description and often get called "Dolly" as in Dolly Parton.

I'm wanting to find some simple clothing in pretty colors and prints to start wearing. Just going to have to look around I guess to find something that will fit me and not be a budget breaker.

[Faliciagayle]

I'm back in my home state of CA for the holiday, and seeing some friends for the first time in 6 months. I started the modest dressing journey before graduation in May but I guess some friends didn't pay too much attention or it was too obvious. It was strange to be "noticed" by people I'm close too but haven't witnessed the progression. I got some comments on my headbands and necklines. It's not enough to change anything but I wasn't expecting it. I don't live in an area where anyone really covers, nor is it the norm with my friends from home.

On a side note, I was shopping for boots and I ran into a gaggle of Frum (Orthodox Jewish) girls looking for boots at the same time. We instantly recognized each other and smiled :):joy: I did feel kinda sheepish because it was the ONE DAY I wasn't wearing any kind of headband or scarf..:o

[Heather :D]

I am a modest dressing woman. I only wear skirts because when wearing pants/shorts, it highlights and encourages people to look at my rear. I think I read that there was a study done that showed that people, all people, not just men, automatically look at the rear end of a woman who is wearing pants. Not so with men wearing pants. I am not interested in either drawing attention to myself nor aiding someone in committing sin. I do believe that when one looks upon the body of another in any way other than pure, we are taking a step toward sinning against that person.

[magstphil]

(i really love the headcoverings on www.garlandsofgrace.com (http://www.garlandsofgrace.com))
:jaw those are GORGEOUS!!!!

I am thinking of headcovering but not really for religious reasons. I am and have always been suuuuuper sensitive about my hair. I only let DH touch it (haven't had my hair professionally cut or styled in over 10 years) and honestly for me that is more intimate then.... erm... other things. :o When I go out in public I stress about my hair. I'm sure this is from years of friends and family making fun of it and saying not so nice things about my crazy curly hair (which I am going to dread as that is what it naturally wants to do). So I have been thinking if I cover maybe I will be able to think of other things. Does that make any sense? DH likes the idea as his brushing and braiding my hair has become something very personal to us.

Anywho that brings me to modesty in general- at first when I returned to Mormonism it was something I *had* to do and I didn't like it but now I am even finding myself wanting to cover more than the bare minimum of the standards. My body has just become something sacred to me and in that I find myself feeling much different things than I expected.

[Kidzaplenty]

OK, for all you covering ladies, how do you possibly keep it on?

I have thick coarse hair. And I have a hard time keeping anything on it unless I clip it really tight. I can wear a metal clamp but that is about it. I do have one head band that I have found that will stay mostly in, but it has elastic at the back and makes my hair itch and hurt where it touches the back of my neck. And bobby pins never really stay where they are put for me.

So, perhaps I am just doing it all wrong. Or perhaps these beautiful head coverings are made special. I just look at the pictures in the link above and know that if I wore something like that, it would stay on my head maybe five minutes before it slipped right off the back.

What's the trick?

[smeisnotapirate]

OK, for all you covering ladies, how do you possibly keep it on?

I have thick coarse hair. And I have a hard time keeping anything on it unless I clip it really tight. I can wear a metal clamp but that is about it. I do have one head band that I have found that will stay mostly in, but it has elastic at the back and makes my hair itch and hurt where it touches the back of my neck. And bobby pins never really stay where they are put for me.

So, perhaps I am just doing it all wrong. Or perhaps these beautiful head coverings are made special. I just look at the pictures in the link above and know that if I wore something like that, it would stay on my head maybe five minutes before it slipped right off the back.

What's the trick?

Check out the Covered Girls (http://www.mothering.com/discussions/showthread.php?t=985372) thread. We've discussed the joys of slipping headcovers at length. :thumb

[Kidzaplenty]

Thank you! :D

[theretohere]

http://www.shukronline.com/
I wanted to let everyone know that Shukr is having a sale! I just got a wrap dress top (I'll wear it as a dress) and a really cute denim skirt, as well as a scarf. :thumb:thumb:thumb:thumb:thumb from me.

[heidirk]

Oh! Those pants and skirts!!! :drool

How do their sizes run? I'm a 16/18 so I'd be an XL or what?

[Kidzaplenty]

I LOVE that full lenghth coat that link has. I just wish I had it at this moment. It is so cold here!

[Liquesce]

Oh! Those pants and skirts!!! :drool

How do their sizes run? I'm a 16/18 so I'd be an XL or what?

Their size chart (http://www.shukronline.com/size-chart.html) goes by measurements. If you're closer to the lower measurement range in a given size, I'd go a size down -- I do myself and have never had problems. Size large and up are reeeaaaally long ... at 5'6" I always need to give things a good hem, and I like things down over my ankle so it's not like I'm wanting things to be high off the ground ... just not dragging in the mud.

[heidirk]

well, I'm 5'10" with long legs, so those sizes seem right on for me!

Everything that's ready made and supposed to be ankle length ends up 'tea length' on me! :lol

[smeisnotapirate]

well, I'm 5'10" with long legs, so those sizes seem right on for me!

Everything that's ready made and supposed to be ankle length ends up 'tea length' on me! :lol

Maybe we can take the extra 6 inches off even the "short" length pants for me and stick it on yours! :lol

I'm going to try to beg DH to let me buy some skirts off Shukr before the Eid sale ends.

[ohmeeohmy]

Oh yay! a whole "tribe" of modest dressing mommas! Now I don't feel like a freak :lol. I'm new here, and my name is Jeni. It's nice to meet you all. Forgive me for not having read the whole thread. . .it's long! Anyhow, I dress modestly for spiritual reasons, but also because that's how I'm comfortable. I've been considering head covering, too. . .but I haven't decided gotten that far yet. Anyhow - hi!

[mama_nomad]

hello, Mamas. I am just recently feeling a pull to dress more modestly now that i have had my third child....i am not religious but after my amazing homebirth it has brought my husband and i's marriage to a whole new level, and i feel like i would like to keep my body a bit more "of a secret", for his eyes only.

i bookmarked that head covering site right away! what i am interested in is making myself some bloomer/pantlettes to wear under skirts. i have not gone through this whole thread (not enough time!) but could anyone point me toward links to bloomer patterns or sources?

thank you!

[smeisnotapirate]

hello, Mamas. I am just recently feeling a pull to dress more modestly now that i have had my third child....i am not religious but after my amazing homebirth it has brought my husband and i's marriage to a whole new level, and i feel like i would like to keep my body a bit more "of a secret", for his eyes only.

i bookmarked that head covering site right away! what i am interested in is making myself some bloomer/pantlettes to wear under skirts. i have not gone through this whole thread (not enough time!) but could anyone point me toward links to bloomer patterns or sources?

thank you!

I never thought of bloomers, actually! I've been buying up those capri-length leggings that EVERYONE seems to be wearing, and layering them underneath skirts. You can get them at Kohl's for $5 (if you have a Kohl's near you).

[phathui5]

You can get bloomers at www.theplaydress.com I get dd's dresses from her.

[rivkah]

I have read through about a fourth of these posts and I'd like to introduce myself and share a few of my thoughts.

I was raised in a very religious community (Jewish) and at some point, I rejected it. I went through a phase particularly, of rejecting the strict standards of "modesty," which I felt, and still feel get mixed up with demonizing the body, and with sexism. About 4 years after I got married, I like to went through a stage wore tight jeans and tight, tight tops, and bikinis at the pool, etc.. I assure you, I got a lot more attention that way (not from dh who did not like it), and it can be sort of addictive.

However, I have since come to appreciate the idea of modesty. I don't feel that bodies are evil, or that sexual impulses are bad. In fact, we all want to be looked at as a sexual object at times--it just needs to be from the appropriate person in the appropriate situation.

I have really started dressing much more like the women in the community in in which I was raised, minus some of the aspects I find silly. For example, I live in Texas--it is regularly in the 100s for weeks at a time. I do not feel compelled to wear black stockings under sandals in the summer. I think I can be perfectly modest and I don't think I am causing any strange men to go into paroxysms of lust at the sight of my toes. I also wear pants suits at work frequently. I am a professional, and it is appropriate. I wear very loose pants that do not emphasize my curves, and I never show chest (not big enough to have cleavage). But generally, I just cover myself--not because I feel bad about my body, but because I don't like to attract attention to myself in an inappropriate way.

My dd is 11, and I find that I am just trying to get her to understand appropriateness. She is totally "fine" with not wearing short skirts or tight jeans so far. She loves the long, long skirts. It of course helps that she has many Orthodox Jewish girlfriends, and went to an Orthodox school for a long time, though we have since moved.

I have come to believe that it is all about what is appropriate for a given setting, and not wanting attract inappropriate attention from the wrong parties. Ultimately, it is about self-respect, and feeling confident enough in yourself to not have to feel that you need to dress provocatively in order to feel good about yourself. If you are married, I think it is also about respecting your spouse.

I have a question for head-coverers. I mentioned that I am a professional--I work full-time. I do not cover my head at work. Most Orthodox women often wear wigs at work or "out." I hate wigs! They are uncomfortable, expensive, and hard-to-care-for, IMO. I am fine with a tichel (scarf) or hat in other settings, but it just doesn't look right with a business suit. I am also not in an area with many Orthodox women or Muslims, so it is very, very rare to see women with covered heads. If I wore a tichel at work, I'd just attract a lot of unwanted attention. Any ideas?

[smeisnotapirate]

Hey, rivkah! :wave

Have you tried to find hats? Some suits look lovely with hats. Maybe you can also wear a snood, depending on the outfit.

Sadly, I've found that the only headcovering that looks truly "professional" is a hijab. :lol

[rivkah]

Hey, rivkah! :wave

Have you tried to find hats? Some suits look lovely with hats. Maybe you can also wear a snood, depending on the outfit.

Sadly, I've found that the only headcovering that looks truly "professional" is a hijab. :lol


I think you are right! For some reason, I'd feel fine wearing a hijab. Maybe because it is so different, people wouldn't comment, and everyone knows that many Muslim women wear hijab. However, If you wear a snood or a hat to an office in Texas, you just look weird. I guess I could say, "I'm Jewish," but that would puzzle people too, because most of the Jewish people in this area are not very religious and very few dress "frum."

Maybe I will try to see what I can do with a hat. Honestly, I don't know that I am all that committed. I am pretty much happy if I cover my head while praying.

Here is a site with a decent selection of long skirts in the $30-40 range:

http://belowtheknee.com/

[imnottelling]

Alternatively, there are things called 'falls' which are half wig, have nothing, and you cover with a headband, scarf, or hat the 'nothing' part. Some people say they are much lighter (I don't have one) and you can get for much cheaper than a full wig. I don't find wigs hard to care for, I wash, let air dry, and then blow dry when it's almost dry to get it smoother and into a "style".

[heidirk]

rivka- It would depend on how long your hair is, but you could pin it up, in a twist, or something similar. Women used to wear their hair up all the time, and it does conceal most of your hair, it's length especially. Then you could look very professional, and not too 'out-there' and still keep your hair as something very special. You could even cover it with a scarf or cloth headband, and havea bit more coverage. You can even arrange it to cover your ears.

[chely7425]

Hi everyone!! I have been moving back towards dressing more modestly lately. I was raised in an orthodox jewish home, so grew up dressing very modestly. Now I wear jeans or skirts that go past the knee. I do wear short sleeve shirts but rarely do I wear tank tops outside the house without something over it. I was wondering if there were any online places you ladies recommended to buy cute modest clothing? Everything I can find around where we live is like... grandma clothes and I am only 23!! I want to be modest and covered but not look like I am wearing a bag, does that make sense?

[ancoda]

i bookmarked that head covering site right away! what i am interested in is making myself some bloomer/pantlettes to wear under skirts. i have not gone through this whole thread (not enough time!) but could anyone point me toward links to bloomer patterns or sources?

thank you!

Just found these bloomers while looking for some other stuff. http://www.myculottes.com/bloomers.html

[ancoda]

Hi everyone!! I have been moving back towards dressing more modestly lately. I was raised in an orthodox jewish home, so grew up dressing very modestly. Now I wear jeans or skirts that go past the knee. I do wear short sleeve shirts but rarely do I wear tank tops outside the house without something over it. I was wondering if there were any online places you ladies recommended to buy cute modest clothing? Everything I can find around where we live is like... grandma clothes and I am only 23!! I want to be modest and covered but not look like I am wearing a bag, does that make sense?
Welcome Rachel. I find this site (http://www.modestclothes.com/) a good place to start in a quest for modest clothes. It has several degrees of modest clothes, many that are still cute while covering.

[chely7425]

Welcome Rachel. I find this site (http://www.modestclothes.com/) a good place to start in a quest for modest clothes. It has several degrees of modest clothes, many that are still cute while covering.

Cool!! Thank you very much for posting that site :D Hopefully I will be able to buy a couple tops after the new year!

[rivkah]

Alternatively, there are things called 'falls' which are half wig, have nothing, and you cover with a headband, scarf, or hat the 'nothing' part. Some people say they are much lighter (I don't have one) and you can get for much cheaper than a full wig. I don't find wigs hard to care for, I wash, let air dry, and then blow dry when it's almost dry to get it smoother and into a "style".

Yeah--I may try the fall. IMO, I think they look a lot more natural than most wigs.

[rivkah]

rivka- It would depend on how long your hair is, but you could pin it up, in a twist, or something similar. Women used to wear their hair up all the time, and it does conceal most of your hair, it's length especially. Then you could look very professional, and not too 'out-there' and still keep your hair as something very special. You could even cover it with a scarf or cloth headband, and havea bit more coverage. You can even arrange it to cover your ears.

It isn't really a modesty thing with me, it is a religious thing. Jewish people (Orthodox) believe that married women should cover their hair. Part of it is modesty, but it is sort of a complicated religious issue that goes further than that. I am pretty wishy-washy on the whole matter, as you can tell, so please do NOT take me as a representative of the religious Jewish community. I do not represent the majority at all! I just wondered if anyone had suggestion for head covering, since many women, for a variety of reasons, wear head coverings.

[Faliciagayle]

...I've found that the only headcovering that looks truly "professional" is a hijab. :lol

This amuses me :) I was playing with my tichels the other day, experimenting with ties and such, because I also feel like they don't look particularly elegant, and I put one on like hijab, it was an epiphany. Like, YES, this is how I want to look. I posted way, way upthread about liking the salwar kameez (http://www.wholesale-beadedjewelry.com/image/salwar_kameez/CFSK-6.jpg) style of dress best for modesty and femininity, but I would feel sooooooooooo out of place wearing that, and/or hijab.

But I do admire the looks. I also find (I hope I'm not offending anyone) that modest Muslim women are much more fashionable than other religious types of modest dressers.... IMHO. :love

[Kidzaplenty]

I posted way, way upthread about liking the salwar kameez (http://www.wholesale-beadedjewelry.com/image/salwar_kameez/CFSK-6.jpg) style of dress best for modesty and femininity, but I would feel sooooooooooo out of place wearing that, and/or hijab.

I LOVE that style, I just do not think I could pull it off. I am too round.

[Liquesce]

TBut I do admire the looks. I also find (I hope I'm not offending anyone) that modest Muslim women are much more fashionable than other religious types of modest dressers.... IMHO. :love

I am forever insulted that you dare refer to my people as fashionable. :hopmad



:wink



The funny thing to me about salwar kameez being considered feminine is that, style-wise, it's natively gender neutral. Regardless, I can't pull that look off either, myself ... and even if I could in terms of body shape, it would just feel a bit much like cultural appropriation for me too ... it's too distinct. *But* a nice slightly fitted duster jacket over trousers or jeans gives the same basic effect while still letting the wearer blend in in the West.

[Summertime Mommy]

The funny thing to me about salwar kameez being considered feminine is that, style-wise, it's natively gender neutral. Regardless, I can't pull that look off either, myself ... and even if I could in terms of body shape, it would just feel a bit much like cultural appropriation for me too ... it's too distinct. *But* a nice slightly fitted duster jacket over trousers or jeans gives the same basic effect while still letting the wearer blend in in the West.

i agree. my mom bought me one for christmas. (she is christian, i am muslim) but i won't wear it outside the house, other than to walk the dog and such, because i would feel like i was taking away from someone else's culture.

of course i kind of feel the same way about abayas, but i am trying to get over that.

[tikva18]

Hi, thought I'd join in here - if you all don't mind. I endeavor to dress modestly - including keeping my hair covered.

[sarahsmiles]

I am just beginning to explore covering, and will likely only do it for Mass, since I work in a "professional" environment and the motivation I have is really respect for the Eucharist, anyway.

But ... I have a huge head and thin fine hair that I'm growing out from a pixie cut, and have really run into problems trying to cover. I discovered a headband/scarf/thing called Buff http://www.buffwear.co.uk/ that is clearly marketed at the outdoorsy crowd, but is working pretty well for me to do a do-rag style.

I don't think they'd work for heavy or longer hair, which is probably what most of you have. Everything else I've tried gives me a headache, but even these tend to slip because my hair is so fine. I have bought a few, but I still feel conspicuous and uncomfortable, even though they don't scream "covering" in any way. I'm just wondering if anyone else has used these, and if I'm missing something in how I wear them, or if the problem lies with me ...

[tikva18]

I am prone to migraines which I sometimes get from covering my hair - I've found that pre-tied tichels are super light weight and don't cause headaches. THey aren't what I typically wear, but are great for those times (I usually wear snoods or a sheitl (wig)).
I did a quick google search and this was my first hit.
http://alizasboutique.com/prbaga7.html

[miriam_bat_avraham]

Replying to the beginning of the post (who knows what's happened in 11 pages!), I dress modestly in partial accordance with the Torah. I wear shirts that at least mostly cover my collarbone with no cleavage showing (and I'm a 38F-G, so I have a whole LOT of cleavage to cover!) and my skirts all cover my knees, and often are ankle-length. I cover my hair based on where I'll be and who I'll be with; I haven't yet converted to Judaism or discussed it with my parents/brothers so I'm avoiding covering my hair when going to visit them.

[ThreeJane]

I am just beginning to explore covering, and will likely only do it for Mass, since I work in a "professional" environment and the motivation I have is really respect for the Eucharist, anyway.

But ... I have a huge head and thin fine hair that I'm growing out from a pixie cut, and have really run into problems trying to cover. I discovered a headband/scarf/thing called Buff http://www.buffwear.co.uk/ that is clearly marketed at the outdoorsy crowd, but is working pretty well for me to do a do-rag style.

I don't think they'd work for heavy or longer hair, which is probably what most of you have. Everything else I've tried gives me a headache, but even these tend to slip because my hair is so fine. I have bought a few, but I still feel conspicuous and uncomfortable, even though they don't scream "covering" in any way. I'm just wondering if anyone else has used these, and if I'm missing something in how I wear them, or if the problem lies with me ...

They have cowls (convertible to thick headband) here:

http://garlandsofgrace.com/cawl.html

They also have snoods and such.

[kangamitroo]

i don't sew, and i'm wondering if one of you might have a good suggestion for modest clothes for Barbie dolls? my dd got some at a yard sale, and their clothes are so immodestly tight she cannot get them on and off. the alternate clothes i saw in the store were, well, unacceptable options. i don't require complete coverage or anything, a nice knee lenght skirt would even be an improvement.

perhaps one of you has some older, more modestly-styled barbie clothes that you would want to get rid of for, say, the cost of shipping?

i do not formally observe modest dress but it is something i have been thinking about a distracting amount of late...hence my dropping in here.

thanks for any tips!

[RainRaven]

i don't sew, and i'm wondering if one of you might have a good suggestion for modest clothes for Barbie dolls? my dd got some at a yard sale, and their clothes are so immodestly tight she cannot get them on and off. the alternate clothes i saw in the store were, well, unacceptable options. i don't require complete coverage or anything, a nice knee lenght skirt would even be an improvement.

perhaps one of you has some older, more modestly-styled barbie clothes that you would want to get rid of for, say, the cost of shipping?

i do not formally observe modest dress but it is something i have been thinking about a distracting amount of late...hence my dropping in here.

thanks for any tips!

http://bonekasalma.com/
They apparently make clothes for this doll.

here is a link http://bonekasalma.com/?cat=6

also here http://www.dollclothessuperstore.com/casualdresses1.html

[Kidzaplenty]

Those are really great dresses. I especially like the Barbie with the hajib (sp?).

[meowee]

BUMP! :)

I don't remember who it was, but I wanted to give an extremely grateful THANK YOU to whichever mama recommended shukr... their clothes are stylish, very well constructed, made of excellent fabrics, and fit my tall frame. I am just thrilled with the order I placed and immediately placed a second order as soon as I wore the first order for a few days. My husband is going to be shocked when he sees the CC statement (I am usually ultra frugal) but this is the first time in my life I have found modest clothes I am comfortable in. I have a lot of fabric sensitivities so I was going nuts trying to find the right clothes and am so happy to finally have clothes I don't dread wearing!!

I love shukr :love:love:love:love:joy: and recommend it to anyone looking for pretty, modest clothes.

[meowee]

Did anyone notice Pelosi's tunic at the speech last night? It had a mandarin collar, loose sleeves, deep pleats and detailing on the front. I wonder who designed it??

http://i2.cdn.turner.com/cnn/2009/POLITICS/02/24/obama.speech/art.obama.03.pool.jpg

http://www.whitehouse.gov/blog/09/02/24/The-Presidents-address-Excerpt/

Around 15:00 you can see it.

[Bellapink]

I'm a Christian who has been feeling led to dress more modestly. With 2 daughters I am trying to be an example to them as well. I also enjoy wearing skirts more than pants, though at home I wear capri sweats or a simple cotton skirt.

[Montana Mom]

Hi there. We were dresses only for several years and I have recently been thinking about getting back on the wagon, so to speak. =)

[MariposaMami]

I am a traditional Catholic Mama and have always covered my head at Mass. For the past 8 years, I've pretty much only worn skirts below the knees, and haven't gone out in public with sleevless shirts. For some time now, I've felt an ardent desire to cover my head, not just at Mass, but elswhere as well. I see the Blessed Mother, and can't help to feel how beautiful she is and always has her head covered. I am starting to wonder why we aren't called to cover our head not just at Mass, but always, if we are always in the presence of God? Anyway, I love these styles in particular: http://www.tznius.com/cgi-bin/tying.pl

I also have a hard time finding nice modest clothing that doesn't make me look like an old bag lady. I'm 28 and would like to look modest, fresh and vibrant for my husband and when out representing with the family :) I've read Colleen Hammond's book, "Dressing with Dignity", and it has helped me, but I still feel like I need a modest clothing fashion rescue/makeover! I'm thinking maybe the Bohemian style might work for me... Hmm....