Am I the only one?

[JSMa]

Turns out my midwife doesn't do an ultrasound until at least week 20... is that weird?

I know so many people who get one at least at 11 or 12 weeks and get to see their babies heartbeat and stuff...

I might die before 20 weeks not being able to make sure everything is all in the right place and that beating heart!!!

Am I the only one that can't rest easy until they see the heart beat or hear it? How am I supposed to wait til 20 weeks??? *cries*

Actually it will be even later than that because week 20 I'll be on my honeymoon.


I just feel sort of deflated... I see all these women saying they got to see or hear their babies heartbeat at week 8, 10... all these things in first trimester.... I feel left out. :(

[A Mothers Love]

IDK for sure, but I think maybe some others are getting early u/s because they were seeing an RE. Or have had losses before ??? This is just a guess really....like I said IDK for sure.
My MW said she will do one @ 20 weeks too. You shouldn't have to wait until then for the heartbeat though. Your MW will be able to pick it up on doppler well before that.(maybe around 10 weeks)

I"m curious why others get to see so early too:p

[Bloomingstar]

no, my midwife isn't sending me for one until I'm 18 weeks or so. Iwant to hear the heartbeat but I'm not sure I want to see in there too much--as long as I know everything is ok, which is what the 18 week ultrasound is for, I'll feel ok about it all.

But I can understand being anxious--I amjust as anxious to have my first prenatal appointment so i can somehow feel like something official has happened, even though i know damn well it's official right now :eyesroll

[annanicole]

20 weeks is pretty standard, but they will listen for your little beans heartbeat after 12 weeks. Does that make you feel better? I know the wait to hear the heartbeat the first time was agonizing.

This is my second pregnancy and I'm completely at peace that all is well with my little one.

Good luck!!!!!

another nice thing about the 20 week ultrasound is they can check everything at one time instead of having to do multiple screens. :thumb

[JSMa]

Thanks for the calming comments. lol People in my area just seem to be sent for u/s for everything. My friend who is only about a month ahead of me has already gone twice and has pictures of her little bean already.


I aksed the lady about hearing the heartbeat on doppler and she said that likely won't happen at the first appointment because 8 weeks is too early to hear it. :(


I know it's just first pregnancy jitters... it's like I need to see it to beleive it or something. lol I don't know... I'm so scared it's not true somehow.

I get so nervous when I move around and don't feel my hard bump... for some reason it seems more prominent at certain times than others and it FREAKS me out. :p


I need to learn to chill. Any advice? lol I have no family history of anything like m/c... but weird things always seem to happen to me... like the whole I just stopped ovulating... :eyesroll

I guess I just continue to pray everythig is safe and as it should be down there and continue to wait....

[A Mothers Love]

Best thing to help you chill is to stay busy. That works for me anyway:D If your 1st appt. is at 8w your next will be at 12 and you will hear that sweet sound then.:love

[rachel616]

My midwife isn't sending me for any ultrasounds at all unless I want one or there's a need. DH is whining about that - he wants to see the picture, but I don't know yet if I'll want to do it. Maybe at 20 weeks. :shrug
She does do a Doppler at 11 or 12 weeks so we can listen to the heartbeat. We're both psyched for that, and my mom is in town and coming with us to that appt so she'll get to hear it too! Yay! :love

My advice: trust and evidence. Trust your body and your baby to do their thing, even though it can be frustrating to not be consciously part of the process! And, without evidence to the contrary, you can be pretty confident that your little one is doing perfectly well. :thumb

And, don't stress about being stressed! That always sends me into a crazy spiral! :nut If you're feeling stressed or anxious, talk about it, write about it (I journal every day - that helps tremendously), cry, exercise, eat ice cream, do whatever you need to do to process your emotions, but don't suppress them or beat yourself up for worrying! It's normal! Embrace the crazy! :lol

Also, congrats on your wedding and honeymoon coming up! :D

[JSMa]

That is a bit more reassuring AMothersLove. *nods* Thank you! :hug Still seems forever away! lol

DP made it seem like it would be sooner because he keeps saying he can't wait to hear the heartbeat and how awesome it is. And brings it up like daily. lol

[JSMa]

That is terriffic advice Rachel. :hug Thank you! *nods*

I've been meaning to get a special journal to note things throughout to put in a keepsake box for little bean when they get older... really need to pick one up. *nods*

[mamajody]

I get to go at 8 weeks because of previous history of multiples. I can't believe I have to wait 4 whole weeks!!! On the other hand I had figured out there were 2 in there on my own by 8 weeks last time.

[annanicole]

Thanks for the calming comments. lol People in my area just seem to be sent for u/s for everything. My friend who is only about a month ahead of me has already gone twice and has pictures of her little bean already.


I aksed the lady about hearing the heartbeat on doppler and she said that likely won't happen at the first appointment because 8 weeks is too early to hear it. :(


I know it's just first pregnancy jitters... it's like I need to see it to beleive it or something. lol I don't know... I'm so scared it's not true somehow.

I get so nervous when I move around and don't feel my hard bump... for some reason it seems more prominent at certain times than others and it FREAKS me out. :p


I need to learn to chill. Any advice? lol I have no family history of anything like m/c... but weird things always seem to happen to me... like the whole I just stopped ovulating... :eyesroll

I guess I just continue to pray everythig is safe and as it should be down there and continue to wait....

I think that's being a first time mom, I was the same way and I'm feeling mighty zen with this one. You tend to listen to others more when you have no experience yourself which tends to lead you down crazy tyrants!!!! LOL

[ainh]

You HEAR the heartbeat...just not SEE the heartbeat. Usually around 12 weeks it's picked up easily.

[mclisa]

You really can't tell if everything is in the right place until 20 weeks - hence the timing.

I'm having an u/s on May 23rd since my last lmp is July 4, 2006...no period when bf and boom got pg. I have just a guestimate of a due date.

[leogirl79]

Nope, with my first I didn't have one until after 20 weeks. Reason was because I didn't have a need. With my other pregnancies we have had to have them because I was nursing or had just finished nursing and we where not sure of dates. This time we'll have one early for that reason as well, but I have to have a c-sec, otherwise it wouldn't be such a big deal. Hang in there. I hated it then, but now I appreciate that it was because I didn't have any problems and was not at risk of any either! Hugs!

[leogirl79]

My advice: trust and evidence. Trust your body and your baby to do their thing, even though it can be frustrating to not be consciously part of the process! And, without evidence to the contrary, you can be pretty confident that your little one is doing perfectly well.

I hadn't read this when I replied.

THANK-YOU!!!!!!

I went and saw my psychologist for counseling today (anxiety issues from our last baby) and she wasn't as helpful as you!!! I needed to hear just that!!!

[xakana]

Turns out my midwife doesn't do an ultrasound until at least week 20... is that weird?

No, that's normal. I always wonder about the ones getting all the extra u/s--none of the OBs here do more than the 20 week unless they think there's something wrong. Getting them constantly can potentially cause problems. I'm convinced that the vaginal ultrasound killed my baby that was due this July and will never have another, not even in an emergency (which that one was).

[JSMa]

Thank you all so much for letting me know this is normal. Here it doesn't seem to be the norm. My friend has had 2 already and she is only about 4 months along.

I'm just going to keep thinking positively. *nods*


If it was an ectopic... I'd have pain by now, right?

[jnet24]

I go to an obgyn and nurse practicionar, and they do two us. One at around 6-8 weeks and then at around 18-20 weeks. I guess the first one they use to try to pinpoint the due date. They measure the baby and then use the size to estimate how far along you are. The other us is the standard us to make sure everything is growing properly and such.

[annanicole]

Thank you all so much for letting me know this is normal. Here it doesn't seem to be the norm. My friend has had 2 already and she is only about 4 months along.

I'm just going to keep thinking positively. *nods*


If it was an ectopic... I'd have pain by now, right?


Yes, you would have significant pain by now, not a little but a lot. btw where in Eastern PA are you?

I'm outside of Harrisburg.

[JSMa]

*whew*

Thanks, annanicole! That is such a releif to know!! lol I had a cousin and someone else have an ectopic all in the past year and I as scared to death of them.


We are only about an hour and a half away from each other then. :D I'm in Allentown.

[annanicole]

*whew*

Thanks, annanicole! That is such a releif to know!! lol I had a cousin and someone else have an ectopic all in the past year and I as scared to death of them.


We are only about an hour and a half away from each other then. :D I'm in Allentown.

where are you having your baby? I'm going to birthcare in Quarryville outside of Lancaster. We also looked at the birthcenter in reading, but they didn't take our insurance. :( But it all worked out in the end I had the greatest combo of midwives at Birthcare that I could ask for and Maribeth attended our birth. It was awesome!!!!

I yelled at my sister the other day for reading that fear mongering book what to esxpect when you're expecting. THat book is SCARY ARY. Nothing like grabbing all the worst case scenarios and throwing them into one book. Then forcing terrified mommy's to wait a month between appointments to ask all the questions LOL

[JSMa]

lol! Yeah I have that book... but after some wise Mama friends told me to take it all with a grain of salt. I was freaking about being 30 lbs overweight.. my NP told me to push that right out of my head and said I was perfectly fine. She is so nice. :)


I'm having a midwife deliver at Lehigh Valley Hospital. They have their own birthing unit there and it's as free from interventions as you want it. :D

[annanicole]

that sounds nice!!! LOL put the book down and slowly step away from it. :D

[KatyLinda]

Hey PA ladies! I grew up in Whitehall and went to college outside Harrisburg! :) I'm living in Baltimore now though. :wink I used to work at Lehigh Valley Hopsital. What a small world!!

[annanicole]

Where did you go to College? I like our area, the weather SUCKS but the area is great we're so central to soo much, yet we still have the nicetys of smalltown USE

[KatyLinda]

I went to college at Messiah College in Grantham. Just outside Mechanicsburg. Total cow country :wink I did enjoy the time I spent there, but we made a lot of trips to Baltimore for some fun! LOL

[JSMa]

lol I know where all of that is! Neat!

I grew up in Easton, went to Wilson High School. Then moved around a little. Did a year of schooling at Johnson & Wales University in Providence, RI. Lived for two years in Columbus, OH.

Now I'm back and not leaving again. I agree that I love the area... close to big fun cities like NYC and Philly, but still has a small town feel.

[annanicole]

I went to college at Messiah College in Grantham. Just outside Mechanicsburg. Total cow country :wink I did enjoy the time I spent there, but we made a lot of trips to Baltimore for some fun! LOL


My mom and stepfather work there, if on campus you ever saw the crew of mentally handicapped guys in the kitchen or cleaning, that was my mom and her crew.

I live in Carlisle, and have spent a lot of time at messiah, it's sooo pretty. Yes we travel to the cities a lot. DC and NYC are my fav day trips!