Can we have a "I Have One Child and I Am DONE. NEVER AGAIN!" group?

[HappilyEvrAfter]

Originally Posted by SweetPotato

I don't want another child nearly as much as I want to cherish the precious child I already have and grow my relationship with her. She owns my heart. She made me a mother. She is enough.

This is a wonderful sentiment!!

I wish I could own it 100%, but really it's just because I don't think I could raise another kid along with this one.
I had a decent pregnancy physically; not so good emotionally.
It was r-o-u-g-h.

Then out pops this highly spirited, highly energetic kiddo. He's intelligent, loving, humorous, adventurous, inquisitive, empathetic, intense and generous, but, OMG!, he sucks the life out me.
I feel like I always have to be two steps ahead just to keep up with him.

When I had my miscarriage just before the divorce I was devastated, but I don't honestly know how I would have been able to deal with two..even if the second one came out very docile.
But, who knows, maybe he's one of those kids that would have been easier to handle if he'd had siblings...I dunno, I'm not eager to find out.

Basically I ask you all: is your current DC worth what you went through? I assume most of you will say yes. So why isn't the next one? Maybe for some that hardship is worth it to be a parent, but after one that's accomplished and all bets are off. I guess its more than that for me. I don't know...

Yes, the next one would be well worth the hardship.
It's not the hardship that concerns me....it's worrying about the quality of mothering I would be able to provide.

Right now, I feel like I can provide enough mothering for one (even being as emotionally strapped as I am), but throw another one in and I'd be compeltely depleted. I don't think I'd be a good mommy with two.

But, I'm a single mom right now. My answer might vary greatly if I saw a partner in the picture.

[rhianna813]

For me, I was not sure if I could pregnant or how easily anyway. So I sorta prepared myself for no kids. Good news is I did get pregnant but it took about 1.5 years with not using any birth control and some acupuncture treatments. I was 35 when DS was born.

He is an awesome, easy going kid. But I am happy with just one child. Because when I started to do the math in my head it looked a lot like this:

2 years to forget about childbirth and adjust to motherhood = age 37
1.5 – 2 years to get pregnant = age 39
Being pregnant, working full time and raising a 4 year old. Plus I do all the cooking and housework, and would automatically be considered a high risk PG = age 40
No thanks!

DH started out wanting 2-3 kids and I have never pressured him into wanting something different but I let him know I was happy with one. Once he realized how much attention one kiddo needs, he joined my camp right away. We’ve passed along all the baby stuff to others.

I am now 41 and happy with my single child, who is turning 6 soon. I get flack from random busybodies I know like my coworkers, but most of my friends also have single children.

Rhianna

PS: I am in Oregon too and yes, it is currently raining