How do we go about adoption

LittleBlessings · 11-03-2009, 03:05 PM

My BF would like to adopt my DC but the problem is we do not no were DC bio father is so he can sign away his rights and what if we do find him and he chooses not to sign them away?

lunabelly · 11-04-2009, 09:24 AM

My cousin was adopted by her step-dad. They couldn't find her bio dad, so they had to sign some forms saying that they made a good faith effort to find him (including putting ads in the newspaper-- this was before internet).

Not sure what happens if you do find him, though.

Good luck!

Trish

ProtoLawyer · 11-04-2009, 09:36 AM

Each state has a slightly different procedure, but it usually boils down to making a reasonable attempt to locate (which, here, things like phone books and googling usually suffice--a PI usually isn't needed when Dad's been out of the picture for years) and then publishing a notice in a newspaper in Dad's last known place of residence.

If Dad doesn't answer, his rights can be terminated by default. If he does answer, he can consent to termination, but he does have the right to contest the termination, but then the court has to decide whether termination is in the child's best interest. Refusal to accept parental rights and responsibilities can be grounds for involuntary termination, as can abandonment. At least here and barring truly extraordinary circumstances, most judges will accept a loving stepparent ready to adopt over a biological father who's been absent for a decade.

Good luck.

Edit: Just noticed the Canadian flag. I don't know how similar provincial laws are to U.S. state laws, but there should be a similar mechanism for you.

nutritionistmom · 11-06-2009, 05:17 PM

I spoke to my lawyer about this not too long ago and just wanted to confirm what the two previous posters have said. My lawyer said it was as easy as sending a registered letter to his last known address. And like ProtoLawyer said, a judge will usually side with a loving step parent over an absentee father.

LittleBlessings · 11-08-2009, 06:33 PM

Thanks for all the feed back.

annie2186 · 11-09-2009, 08:39 PM

The only thing I have to add (and I have NO idea about Canada) but I know in my state you actually need to be married for at least a year to the bio-parent in order to do a step-parent adoption........

Maybe the laws are different in Canada! But other than that - ditto to what everyone else said!

LittleBlessings · 11-09-2009, 10:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by annie2186

The only thing I have to add (and I have NO idea about Canada) but I know in my state you actually need to be married for at least a year to the bio-parent in order to do a step-parent adoption........

Maybe the laws are different in Canada! But other than that - ditto to what everyone else said!

Do you have to be married or can you just be common law

annie2186 · 11-09-2009, 10:53 PM

I live in Colorado - which DOES acknowledge common law marriage......so I am assuming that it would be the same as actually being "married".

However, since we were married (not common law) for more than a year before I looked into it - I really don't know all of the details that would involve being common law vs. actually married.

It probably wouldn't be hard to find out alot of basic info for free. I talked to several lawyers about my situation over the phone completely for free!