Other people's reaction to family cloth? - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 15 Old 06-25-2010, 11:45 PM - Thread Starter
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My good friend is refusing to come over because of our family cloth and bucket system I'm not sure how to deal with this.
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#2 of 15 Old 06-26-2010, 12:01 AM
 
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No to many knows that we use family cloth. We still have paper towel in the bathroom for guests, but I try to keep mines cloth buckets most of the time empty when we have some guest. I totally feel that is just choice for my family is nobody else business.

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#3 of 15 Old 06-26-2010, 11:55 AM
 
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Are you willing to have a few rolls of actual toilet paper in the house for guests? This should solve the problem.

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#4 of 15 Old 06-26-2010, 11:58 AM
 
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Seriously? Refusing to come over? I guess travel to Mexico would be out of the question too, since tp there is usually put in a trash can instead of flushed.

Sounds like she's either really misunderstanding things, or has issues that this triggers. Can she clarify what the problem is? Is it the family cloth itself, or something about the bucket system? Would she like to bring her own tp? Would she like to read the family cloth support thread here?

When someone asks to use our bathroom, I tell our friends that they can find tp up on top of the cabinet or use the cloth wipes in the pretty basket, which then go into the metal step can. I don't offer more discussion unless asked. I find that people who want to know more are genuinely interested and open minded, and those who might be weirded out spare themselves by not asking for more information.

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#5 of 15 Old 06-26-2010, 12:00 PM
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Originally Posted by sleepypeanutsmom View Post
Are you willing to have a few rolls of actual toilet paper in the house for guests? This should solve the problem.
That's what I was thinking. "Family" cloth shouldn't (IMO) mean "family & friends" cloth. There are a lot of people in the world who have trouble just using a bathroom in someone else's house....especially for #2. Wanting them to use cloth and having you being responsible for laundering their wipes is a high expectation in our society.
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#6 of 15 Old 06-27-2010, 11:03 AM
 
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Yeah, I'm all for family cloth, but I don't want to use someone else's (as in not my family) nor do I want to use another familys' cloth.

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#7 of 15 Old 06-27-2010, 04:23 PM - Thread Starter
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I do have paper tp available. I totally agree that it would be weird to use someone elses family cloth.

My friend just has an issue because the used family cloth is in a bucket next to the toilet. We have a cover for the bucket, but often dd1 and dd2 forget to put it back on. She said she is also icked out by the bucket we use for going number 2. We use it after much research that squatting when defecating helps digestion and reduces cancer risk. I rinse out the buckets after use, but she just can't handle it. I wonder if she had some sort of issue growing up regarding defecation? IDK? She seems pretty weirded out
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#8 of 15 Old 06-28-2010, 01:28 AM
 
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I think that it would be pretty common for people who are more mainstream, or haven't heard of family cloth at least, to have that ick factor. I know my extended family and friends would be a bit weirded out by it, especially if it was out in the open, so don't take it personally.

Since you do provide tp, would she be comfortable visiting if the family cloth and bucket were placed under the sink, or in the bathtub with the shower curtain closed, instead of being out in the open? That way she wouldn't have to see them as they make her uncomfortable, but they would still be in your washroom for you and your family to use.
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#9 of 15 Old 07-01-2010, 09:07 PM
 
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Originally Posted by PancakesMancakes View Post
I do have paper tp available. I totally agree that it would be weird to use someone elses family cloth.

My friend just has an issue because the used family cloth is in a bucket next to the toilet. We have a cover for the bucket, but often dd1 and dd2 forget to put it back on. She said she is also icked out by the bucket we use for going number 2. We use it after much research that squatting when defecating helps digestion and reduces cancer risk. I rinse out the buckets after use, but she just can't handle it. I wonder if she had some sort of issue growing up regarding defecation? IDK? She seems pretty weirded out
Ah, that's a whole different situation. I would just do what ElaynesMom suggested, put the buckets in the tub with the shower curtain closed, while your friend is there. I do that with my family cloth basket when certain people are visiting. Some folks I don't worry about, lol. Hopefully your friend will visit if she knows she doesn't have to see either bucket. Because it would just be silly if she wouldn't! Has she never visited someone who forgot to flush?

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#10 of 15 Old 07-02-2010, 10:28 PM
 
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We only use family cloth for #1 so we still have have tp. I don't think any of my friends would use it though. They all think I am crazy for using it. My cousin uses it at her house so I think she and her kids use it here and we use it as her house, but besides that they use tp.

If we used family cloth for poo as well and didn't buy tp I don't think I would buy it just for guests but we don't get many visiters up this way. If I had lots of people visit I may buy it just for them I don't know.

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#11 of 15 Old 07-03-2010, 04:50 AM
 
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My sister lives with us and is totally grossed out. She buys her own toilet paper now because she doesn't like the kind I keep on hand for guests, and because I only buy them one roll at a time now. Used cloths go into the diaper pail next to the toilet, we have a "diaper" sprayer, so I don't worry about hiding the pail when people come over, there is nothing to see.

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#12 of 15 Old 07-06-2010, 09:15 PM
 
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Let me clarify. You don't go #2 in the toilet, you go in a bucket and then wash the bucket? And you also use family cloth?

Is it family cloth, the poo bucket or both that freak her out?

I will say that we use family cloth for #1, I don't expect others to use it, don't want to use anyone else's and I would be icked out about a poo bucke too. That might be something you don't even want to tell people.

It's not something most people will understand.

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#13 of 15 Old 07-07-2010, 03:13 AM
 
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I admire the poo bucket idea...it probably is much healthier. Me and my germ/anxiety issues could probably never do it though.

My dd and I use family cloth for everything. But I do put out tp for guests when they're coming.

I've been told numerous times that I'm gross...but that's usually as far as the conversation goes. Lots of other people say that they think it's neat, but that they could never do it themselves. And for all I know I've converted some folk.

If someone refused to come over to my house over it...I don't think they're the kind of friend I would want anyways honestly. Put the poo bucket in the shower or somewhere, make sure nothing stinks and the lid is on the cloth holder bucket. And if she's a real friend that should be more than plenty for you to do to keep her happy (unless she has ocd or some other major issues).

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#14 of 15 Old 07-07-2010, 05:51 AM
 
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If someone refused to come over to my house over it...I don't think they're the kind of friend I would want anyways honestly. Put the poo bucket in the shower or somewhere, make sure nothing stinks and the lid is on the cloth holder bucket. And if she's a real friend that should be more than plenty for you to do to keep her happy (unless she has ocd or some other major issues).
Exactly! It bothers me that a friend would refuse to visit OP because of something she doesn't have to have anything to do with. Everyone has some habit or whatever that would bother a person. The bucket gets rinsed, the friend doesn't have to use the bucket or the family cloth. It's a non-issue. The friend would definitely be bugged in my bathroom because I keep the used wipes in a plastic basket with no lid or anything. And hey, look at that, they don't even smell.

Okay, I'm tired and feeling overly snarky and such. I'll stop now, lol. It just amazes me that someone could make such a big deal of what is really nothing, to the point of threatening a friendship (is what it boils down to). Very sad. Hugs, PancakesMancakes!

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#15 of 15 Old 10-06-2010, 01:50 PM
 
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i dont tell people and i WOULD not let guests use our cloth...i would feel weird about that. anyways our "diaper pail" is in the bathroom as well as our "baby wipes" and no one knows otherwise....besides i use them as wipes for DD (we bought really nice FC from a WAHM) and her dipes do go in the same pail (aka SS trash can bathroom sized)

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