Just turned down a great job - Mothering Forums

Forum Jump: 
 
Thread Tools
#1 of 5 Old 03-03-2010, 07:37 PM - Thread Starter
 
destinybound's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2004
Posts: 73
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I am a sahm and have been for years, my ds is 6, dd is 4. I applied for this part time (20 hours) job that I would have loved, I went to not one but two interviews and then called today to tell them to take my name out of the running. I believe it was the right choice, although we are usually out of money by the end of the month, we are surviving and leaving the kids at least three days a week sounded so hard....my mom was willing to take them but they have school, (we are in a cooperative school so i am there ALOT) and it would have all been turned on its head.

SO, I am still poor, still thinking about whats next but do love the fact that I get to be with the kids for a while longer anyway...

Anyone else been through this type of thing? Please tell me I made the right decision.
destinybound is offline  
#2 of 5 Old 03-03-2010, 07:48 PM
 
AngieB's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Northern California
Posts: 1,555
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Yep, last year I turned down my dream job. It was the job I have said I wanted since I was 17 years old, I had planned for it and thought it would all work out, the person was going to retire just about the same time my youngest was starting kindy. I have been doing the job very part time and was all ready to step in...Then I got pregnant again. youngest dd was only 2 when the switch was to take place and I just couldn't do it so I turned it down. Someone else took the position and I now have at least another 7 years before it will open up again. I still sometimes get made that I gave it up, like when the kids are driving me crazy or we are once again short on money, but I do know it was for the best. My time will come when all the kids are older.
AngieB is offline  
#3 of 5 Old 03-03-2010, 07:49 PM
 
blizzard_babe's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Land of Beer and Cheese, baby.
Posts: 4,900
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Honestly, I don't think it's a right decision-wrong decision kind of thing. You say that you LOVE being home with the kids, and that you'd have LOVED the job. The way I see it, you were in a win-win situation, and you picked the one that is the bigger win for you and your family AT THIS MOMENT.

There will be jobs out there when you're ready. If you made it to round 2 of the interview in this economy, you must be an attractive candidate to employers in a field you know you'd like .

Me+DH+DS1+DS2+Dog=me and a house full of guys, which is really just peachy, thanks.
blizzard_babe is offline  
#4 of 5 Old 03-03-2010, 07:55 PM
 
carfreemama's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2007
Posts: 1,517
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Whether it was the "right" decision or not, it was very brave and full of love for your kids. If it would have interfered with a school situation you think is really good for your kids, or whatever else would have had to change, then you probably made a really good decision. When dd was born, I was sure I would go back to work full time after my 1 year maternity leave. As the months wore on and she was nursing all the time still, I started to get a sick feeling. People would ask me if I was looking forward to getting back to work and I just couldn't answer. I finally blurted out to dh that I just didn't want to go back. Like you, we were surviving; but really needed my income. To my surprise, he was fine with me staying home and completely understood. I have gradually returned to work full time; but dd is 6 and I work from home. I am there to pick her up for lunch and after school and we don't need any childcare. I am very glad I made this decision.

I do think that if you WANT to go back to work, you should consider your own needs and how much the extra money might add to your family's quality of life. I think your kids would be fine with your mother looking after them (if you feel comfortable with that). But I once read someone who said not to confuse quality of life with standard of living and that's become my motto, too.

I think you did a great thing for your family and I think it took guts.
carfreemama is offline  
#5 of 5 Old 03-04-2010, 10:58 PM - Thread Starter
 
destinybound's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2004
Posts: 73
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Thanks so much, these are the best responses I have gotten from anyone!
AngieB, our time WILL come and I think once it is back to work time, it will be for a long time and no matter how awesome the job is we will pine for the days when our kids were little,

blizzardbabe, it IS a win win, you are right, thanks for that perspective,
carfreemama, many days at home with the kids and a blow up pool are so much better than one week on an island....the money and time will come, thanks for that....
destinybound is offline  
Reply

Quick Reply
Message:
Drag and Drop File Upload
Drag files here to attach!
Upload Progress: 0
Options

Register Now

In order to be able to post messages on the Mothering Forums forums, you must first register.
Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.
User Name:
If you do not want to register, fill this field only and the name will be used as user name for your post.
Password
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.
Password:
Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.
Email Address:

Log-in

Human Verification

In order to verify that you are a human and not a spam bot, please enter the answer into the following box below based on the instructions contained in the graphic.



User Tag List

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page


Forum Jump: 

Posting Rules  
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off