I'm not sure where to post this, so I'm posting here.
I'm an adult only child, I do have a step-sister and a step-brother who are rarely around my family except my step sis will come over for holidays. My mom *hates* Thanksgiving because her mom would buy the hugest turkey cook it until it was way overdone and then feed it to them for months from the freezer, so she hates turkey and therefore Thanksgiving.
The holidays when my parents were together were a nightmare, our families lived on the other side of the state, SO we would travel to see them. I remember my parents being super stressed because we had to see EVERYONE in 3 days. Dad's parents, my mom's mom, her aunt....it was very stressful. My g-ma on my mom's side is a horrible, guilt-tripping woman, if she wasn't my g-ma I'd probably never speak to her again because she says mean stuff about me, my kids, and most everyone. She treats my mom like dirt and my mom puts up with it. She now lives close to my mom because she is aging and needs help. My mom has a brother who lived down the street from g-ma for 20 years, he put up with much of her crap for that 20 years. We moved across state, then out of state. Now my mom and her brother are fighting because he hates his mom, I can hardly blame him, he doesn't want to see her because, well she's wretched.
Anyway I'm babbling....This year I don't want to go to Thanksgiving at my mom's-at all. Her house is not baby-proofed and I have a 13 month old busy baby, I've already done this scenario before with my DD. I am fine without some baby-proofing but this borders on scary dangerous, my DD has found scissors, sharpened pencils, there's a burning hot woodstove by the main walk way.
My mom is guilt-tripping me now, saying my step-sis is coming, she told g-ma and g-ma is bummed(whatever
). She hasn't said she's annoyed that we are not coming, yet I can fully hear it in her voice and her inflections while speaking. She gets really ho-hum when things don't go her way-exactly
what she hates about my g-ma.
I really just want a nice holiday at my IL's, no worrying my son is going to fall on a stove or stab himself with scissors. She's just being so depressed acting and I know even if she wouldn't admit it she's trying to guilt me into coming over. Now she won't answer her phone(also g-ma's MO).
Ugh. Any advice? TIA