Healing Anxiety Support thread!! - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 14 Old 08-25-2011, 10:23 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Anyone else have anxiety issues? Mine goes off and on but I am going through a tough time of it at present. I would love to start a thread with others who go through anxiety often enough for it to be somewhat of an issue, and to support eachother and share things that we have found to help cope with and heal it. anyone else?

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#2 of 14 Old 08-25-2011, 12:05 PM
 
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Hi, I suffer from anxiety off and on. Lately, thank God, it's been off. A lot of my issues are resolved when I Let Go. Sometimes, I just have to Let Go of things and go lay down and take a nap. I also try to be kind and gentle to myself and to put my needs first. This took me years to learn.

I'm a much better person when I take care of me and honor my body. If I'm tired or overwhelmed emotionally, I stop feeling bad about it. Instead now, I tell myself, "It's o.k., this will pass." A big part of healing for me was learning to say "No" and not feeling bad about it. I was putting a lot of pressure on myself to be everything to everyone.

Dr. Wayne Dyer's book, "Change your Thoughts, Change Your Life" really helped me a lot. http://www.hayhouse.com/details.php?id=3187
Also, The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle. http://www.eckharttolle.com/books/now/

I also have a prescription for Xanax that I use when I need it. It used to be daily. Now, it's maybe one day a month. I use it when I need it and I'm grateful for it.

My grandma told me the other day, "I miss the old Bejeweled. You were so light in Spirit." Well, yes I was, but I've gone through a lot, and I've changed, and that's O.K. My young DH had a stroke and is now disabled and I'm his caregiver. He's recovered a lot; but both of our lives have changed forever. I've also just finished obtaining my Doctorate (which I had put on hold) and have a beautiful little girl that is the coolshine.gif of our lives.

Before I would try to put on the happy face. Now, I'm not so concerned about other people's opinions. I love and honor Myself and who I now am. I am a Survivor.

I'm so looking forward to hearing other people's stories.

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#3 of 14 Old 08-25-2011, 12:15 PM
 
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Low grade on-and-off anxiety...yup, that's me. It's some combination of being a sensitive (spirited? artistic? intense?) person, plus having some challenges in my life that I don't always know how to deal with (needed house repairs that we can't afford, for example), plus carrying some grief (from being an adoptee, losing my mom to cancer, having an unwanted c-section).

 

Random list of things that seem to help:

 

Books by Pema Chodron. Especially "Comfortable with Uncertainty." That one really helped me figure some things out.

 

Standing meditation. I've always had trouble with sitting meditation, but right now standing meditation is working great for me. I put it into my weekly schedule because that's how I ensure that I'll actually do it. (I do it before work on Tuesday mornings...I bike to campus, do the meditation outside, and then go in to work. And I invite others to join me, so I'm rarely alone.)

 

Exercise. My anxiety is much less now that I commute everywhere by bicycle. Yoga & dance jams are also miraculous for me. I cannot be anxious and dance at the same time.

 

Sleep. OMG, I had no idea how dependent I was on sleep until I spent 2+ years not getting it. My anxiety went through the roof after DD was born. Now that I'm getting a regular 6-7 hours a night again, things are better.

 

I feel like I could make some dietary changes that might lessen my anxiety, but the thought of having to control my eating  makes me anxious!


Living in Wisconsin with my partner of 20+ years and our DDenergy.gif(Born 10/09/08 ribboncesarean.gif). Why CI Mama? Because I love contact improvisation!

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#4 of 14 Old 08-25-2011, 01:13 PM
 
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Yes! Sleep helps me soooo much. I get at least 8 hours nightly + naps daily. I also read somewhere that you can't exercise and be anxious at the same time.

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#5 of 14 Old 08-25-2011, 01:26 PM
 
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Count me in.

 

My anxiety goes from 0 to 60mph, from a slight worry to OMG! crisis mode and I can't make it stop.  Much of my anxiety is very irrational and I know it but I can't stop the cycle of worry.  I suspect I may also have OCD linked to my anxiety.

 

Keeping very active physically helps me but for a number of reasons, I can't fit regular exercise into my life right now.  I hope to change this once DS starts school.

 

Mine the worst at night.  Lord help me if I wake up in the middle of the night, I simply can't turn my mind off.

 

I do have a Rx for ativan.  I take it only when necessary.  My family doc keeps reminding me that there are other meds we can try if I think I need a constant maintenance.  I waffle on this route. 

 

My anxiety has affected my marriage because DH and I operate in different ways.  He needs to chill out at the end of the work day.  By bedtime, he is all ready to talk about money, finances, big decisions, etc and that is the WORST possible time for me because by bedtime, I need to shut down and "check out" by reading or watching something relaxing on TV.  We really should schedule a time weekly to have serious talks so we both feel like we are being heard.

 

Recently I saw mention (maybe on MDC) that writing your worries down is freeing but I am anxious about doing that because in my mind, putting them on paper might make them more "real."


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#6 of 14 Old 08-25-2011, 01:59 PM
 
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I've told my DH and DD that I'm off duty at 9 pm. And I'm serious. By then, I'm spent. The rest of the night is MINE.


[quote name="Caneel" urlMy anxiety has affected my marriage because DH and I operate in different ways.  He needs to chill out at the end of the work day.  By bedtime, he is all ready to talk about money, finances, big decisions, etc and that is the WORST possible time for me because by bedtime, I need to shut down and "check out" by reading or watching something relaxing on TV.  We really should schedule a time weekly to have serious talks so we both feel like we are being heard.

 

Recently I saw mention (maybe on MDC) that writing your worries down is freeing but I am anxious about doing that because in my mind, putting them on paper might make them more "real."

[/quote]


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#7 of 14 Old 08-29-2011, 03:38 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I have always had a tendancy to worry- but not always I guess- I have been pretty brave uch of my life but maybe an undercurrent of worry. But having my first child 17 months ago- wow- I am like a worry maniac. NOt like a helicopter parent type of worry- more that the world is just so mean and scary and dangerous in so many ways- and my child is so pure and beautiful and lovely- and I just want to keep me and him safe- but there is so  much to worry about. sigh. it is a heavy load to carry when I am feeling afraid.

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#8 of 14 Old 08-29-2011, 04:13 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Snapdragon View Post

I have always had a tendancy to worry- but not always I guess- I have been pretty brave uch of my life but maybe an undercurrent of worry. But having my first child 17 months ago- wow- I am like a worry maniac. NOt like a helicopter parent type of worry- more that the world is just so mean and scary and dangerous in so many ways- and my child is so pure and beautiful and lovely- and I just want to keep me and him safe- but there is so  much to worry about. sigh. it is a heavy load to carry when I am feeling afraid.



I completely understand.  I stopped watching the news after DS was born.  Anything that related to risk to a child, illness, suffering, etc. sent me into an anxiety spiral.   It has gotten somewhat better (my son is nearly 6 yo) since the baby years.

 


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#9 of 14 Old 08-29-2011, 07:47 PM - Thread Starter
 
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sometimes I write these posts when I am in the middle of a hard feeling- which of course passes. Then I go back and look at it when I am feeling calm and happy- like right now- and I feel embarressed. I am not always worried by any means, I ust get into these boughts of it. I do have this anxiety thing that comes and goes and is part ofme, but I also have lots of calm strong feeling too- just had to say as that last post felt kind of extreme to me that I Wrote and I am like= oh, I don't feel like that always!

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#10 of 14 Old 08-29-2011, 07:52 PM
 
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No need to feel embarrassed. That's what MDC is here for---support in the good and not so good times.

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sometimes I write these posts when I am in the middle of a hard feeling- which of course passes. Then I go back and look at it when I am feeling calm and happy- like right now- and I feel embarressed. I am not always worried by any means, I ust get into these boughts of it. I do have this anxiety thing that comes and goes and is part ofme, but I also have lots of calm strong feeling too- just had to say as that last post felt kind of extreme to me that I Wrote and I am like= oh, I don't feel like that always!



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#11 of 14 Old 08-29-2011, 08:54 PM - Thread Starter
 
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thanks!! I am reading this really cool book right now called Original Self by Thomas Moore. It has a section that talks about not trying to be a perfect person but rather living an authentic life with all its cycles and ups and downs and even our challenging aspects of self as part of this whole dance of life. I like that thought.

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#12 of 14 Old 08-30-2011, 06:58 AM
 
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I woke up feeling so good today. This is after not feeling so good yesterday and the day before. In the down times, it's so hard to remember that things will soon be up. It is all cyclical.

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#13 of 14 Old 08-30-2011, 01:23 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by *bejeweled* View Post

I woke up feeling so good today. This is after not feeling so good yesterday and the day before. In the down times, it's so hard to remember that things will soon be up. It is all cyclical.


I hear you! IT is a weird thing to talk about one's challenges- I always feel like I need to defend it- like, well, I am dealing with all this anxiety- but really I am a good person, a good mother, have all these strengths . . .as if having a weakness in a particular area means that I am inherently faulted- so I guess that is my disclaimer-  to be free to talk about the challeneges while recognizing it is just one aspect of me.

 

It is all cyclical- and also depends on circumstances.  I am getting ready to go home tonight after having a sort of vacation the last few days in which dh was with me all the time and we stayed in a nice place/ I get so nervous about daily life at home with ds sometimes. I have a lot going on at home that I ahve to deal with- bills to pay, so many things to organize- it felt good just to get away from it all for a while. I think modern life can be so stressful and isolating. I have recently met some nice women with kids- a few different ones with young kids- that I am slowly starting to connect with which is great. But I still don't have a really solid support network built up. I hope these various women and I can deepen our friendships. anyway

 

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#14 of 14 Old 08-30-2011, 04:52 PM
 
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My anxiety paralizes me.  When it is bad, I can't get anything done, at all.

 

I read somewhere that "the enemy of anxiety is action" or something along those lines so when I am in my anxious periods, I force myself to do little tasks to take my mind off all the bad thoughts.  I am working on decluttering right now, which is having so many positive results.  The areas of the house I have tackled (and maintained!) are working for me and reducing my day-to-day stresses.  I still have a ways to go on these projects but I am seeing light at the end of the tunnel.  I don't expect this to be a magic cure but I think simplifying my life will allow me to focus on positive changes like more exercise, more time for creative pursuits that will be good for my mind.

 

Have anyone tried diet changes or natural remedies?  I have read that caffine and alcohol ramps up anxiety.  I am wondering if anyone have seen a difference after eliminating either or both.


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