Just another SAHM identity/existential crisis... - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 4 Old 07-31-2013, 12:27 AM - Thread Starter
 
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deleted.

Thanks.


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#2 of 4 Old 08-03-2013, 06:28 PM
 
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I am posting so I can come back to your thread when I have a little time to give so thoughts, and also in hopes that someone else will come along and have advice.
 


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#3 of 4 Old 08-03-2013, 06:43 PM
 
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This is so painfully familiar. I'll come back to post more.
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#4 of 4 Old 08-03-2013, 08:52 PM
 
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I thin kthat no matter how much you may think you don't need in real life friends, or how anti social and socially awkward you may be, you really need to find some adults irl to hang out with. humans (and animals) are social creatures. We are not designed to live in isolation.  I think you should try to find some people to hang out with regularly! I think you shouldn't worry about if they are the perfect friends for you or if you have enough in common with them or if they like you enough-- just that they are good nice pleasant people. Even going to a store regularly and talking with the cashier. But more than that- just finding people to talk to most days is so so important.

 

I think sometimes people who feel socially awkward and isolated feel like they have to go from zero to a hundred and it is too overwhelming. Like, you have no friends now and you are supposed to go out and make a group of likeminded close friends. How would you do that?

I think instead of that goal, just have a goal to try to socialize more days. Pack up your kids in a double stroller ( or a single stroller and a baby wrap!) and go to whatever town you live in. Go to thestore, the café, the library.

 

Say hi to the moms with kids, they will say hi back. then just keep going out! you don't even have to manage meaningful conversations, just start socializing yourself. It is too lonely to live alone and just work. The joy of life comes from connecting with others,. Also sometimes if I am feeling down I will go out and see people- just in town wherever, and just talk to people and it reminds me of joy.

 

Not that all people are joy! Far from it! I happen to live in a town (thank goodness after looking around a lot) that has nice people in it. But there are nice people to be found most places.

Just get yourself out of the house more- walk around, see people. Start there. Isolation is no fun. Good luck!!!

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