Hello!!! Guess what? I'm still doing great! Monday will be one whole month free from bulimia and that's my longest in years and years...And the more time that passes without it, the easier it seems, like the possibilty of doing that to myself is just floating further away into the past. One thing that really helped was to take that suggestion in one of Gully's link (Jane Latimer's, I think) where whenever you feel like binging you instead find some "obscenely selfish" thing to do for yourself--several times I've gone into my room (locked the door, dh with dd...) and lounged with herbal tea and a novel instead of running to the kitchen. It felt great!! Also the no night eating thing is helping because that's when I used to binge a lot...
I wanted to see if anyone else is dealing with a couple of issues:
1) Sometimes my stomache feels empty at bedtime and I have a much harder time falling asleep that way! I've heard this is because its so sedating to overeat that it puts you to sleep, and its better for you to sleep without having to digest food while you're resting, but...Sometimes I feel so wide awake! Any suggestions?
2) I have this thing about not wasting food. So I'm feeling great because bulimia is the ultimate waste of food!!! But its really hard for me to stop eating when I'm full sometimes, because I hate the idea of that food having to be thrown away. I've started cooking smaller amounts, and freezing leftovers...But I was just wondering if anyone else struggles with this. We were kinda poor when I was little, and I obsess over being thifty (when I'm not guiltily overspending...). Somehow I think my issues with scarity vs. overconsumption are related to my struggles with bulimia and food, and I feel like I want to work on healing what feels like this neurosis about not wasting resources/worrying about money while going on consumption "binges" in any form. Does anyone else who struggles with food have other issues with "consumption" or "restriction" in terms of money/resources, too? It feels deeply related to me. And I'm not sure what to do with those feelings. Like it's obvious to me that its time to learn to not throw up, but how do I grow and mature in terms of my money issues?
One idea that's floating in my head is that its time for me to both trust in abundance and not obsess about having enough/wasting, and also that's it s time to become the kind of person who gives more to others in need....
Your thoughts, pretty please?
In other news, I got a trampoline, and dd loves it (me too!).
Thanks for being there, mamas!