Thanks so much for taking the time to post!
I do feel "constrained by my feminine role" as you thought...
I feel frustrated with being a SAHM. I do too much for my kids, not enough for me. It's winter and the isolation is difficult.
I don't take the time to be myself and feed my passions (I'm at heart an artistic creative person, but you would never know that to look at my life.)
Yes I do feel I am "questioning my self image as a mom."
WheN I try to make friends with other moms I feel left out. I've found it hard to click with people. Even in the circles I do find myself in, I never feel comfortable with myself/them.
renegade/energy...what a cool observation.
I feel that my overeating makes me tired. I am working on changing (yoga helps me to not overeat so much
social mores, chafing at them...
the women on the View all have lots of makeup, gleaming teeth, perfect hair...I feel they are very fake, feel low about how I look in real life.
Some phrases you wrote:
high school being judgemental of social roles...
not accepted by others...these are my issues for sure!
Repressed male energy...
now that is interesting. That's a neat new perspective. I feel tired and passive and sluggish and sick of housework...Creativity and energy and finding something to be INSPIRED about sounds really cool.
Males in my life...yes I definitely have issues with men in my family...nuf said, I could write a book. I'll look at that some more.
(And expectations, if I am like (X) am I feminine, am I a good enough mom etc. Roles my parents took on (games) and dh and me.)
Abuse...yes I have baggage but I also feel my daughter in the dream represented me. I worry about the world not accepting her for herself as she grows, but is this really about ME (eating too much to deal with emotions may be what the food represents) When I dream about her maybe it really represents me. Yes the other child is a boy and I found him right away in the dream. (You commented on that indicating gender issues.) Do I think men matter more, are treated better, have more freedom?
(PS her birth was also an abusive experience, and it involved drugs...maybe that is part of the symbolism!)
I've been dreaming SO MUCH this week. Another theme (TWICE THIS WEEK) is about race. I feel it's symbolic. Twice I have dreamed about being in a group of African Americans and fearing they wouldn't accept me as a white woman, then finding out I was wrong and being pleasantly surprised by love and support.
Very cool huh?
To sum it all up, I need to find loving supportive networks and community in my life, and I need to love myself and be myself, and I'm finding it a challenge.
Thank you so much!
PS If you do find the time I would like to hear more about the male energy in myself idea...