carmen, thanks for the insights! your comments sparked several cool ahas! your "pushing through" observation and comment about regrets about birthing are totally right on and i can't believe i didn't see it myself! i birthed ds at home, we had a birthing pool (!) in the family room (i hated being in the water tho, didn't help me at all). my only regret about the birth is that i knew i was ready to push at one point in the family room but the midwife checked and didn't think i was fully dilated, so i went thru 2 1/2 more hours of transition, until she ultimately figured out that i was fully dilated in mid contrax but it wasn't evident between them, maybe b/c my waters hadn't broken yet) so i've felt regretful that i'm not going to have another one b/c i want a chance to experience my birthing as it was meant to be (however, two spirited/high needs whatever you want to call them children is quite enough for me right now!)
"Vast, untapped resources that only take a bit of imagination and openness from me to see!!!" -- this is such an inspiring thought! i'm going to let this one percolate in and see what comes up...
about your dream, parismaman,
portland/alameda is definitely significant, either for what the place represents for you emotionally, or, since you didn't spend much time there, maybe more obviously as a pun. port land? i'm trying to remember what alameda means in spanish. do you know spanish? i just looked it up and i get either poplar grove or boulevard or promenade, which doesn't seem immediately promising to me. if you play around with either of those place names, do you come up with anything?
if this were my dream, assuming that the male friend is an aspect of myself, i might think about this being the masculine energies i mentioned in connection with momtwice's dreams -- doing, creating, fixing, stuff you can't do when you're intensively raising a little one all day. so this side of me is paralyzed and, intriguingly, deaf (when i first read hard-of-hearing i thought, "hmmm, a part of me isn't being heard," but i don't know if that fits logically with this particular interpretation scenario.)
the bitchy woman could be another part of me, the part that drives me to be a perfect mom, maybe ingrained/absorbed cultural concepts of a female role limited to nurturing. so, of course she's asking snottily where my kids are.
so she asks my male aspect and i answer for it that he's been trying for years. if this were my dream, (b/c i have felt creatively blocked for years) i would interpret my male aspect's "children" as creative projects/output and think i am feeling creatively barren...
sign language is an interesting detail too, (though it ties in of course with deafness)
somehow, i feel like the hard-of-hearing part and communicating to your masculine aspect with sign language are important to decipher, but i'm not getting any further with them.
well, i should help dh chase down the little ones. i'll be very interested to hear your continued interpretations of your own dream.... lots of strong symbolism in this one, i think!
thanks again carmen and mamajamz (and noooo, congrats will not be needed anytime soon! i just don't know how moms cope with more than two kids! of course, i wondered how i was going to handle more than one, before harrison came along! but, still, i am not going there, even though i can't stop thinking about it ever since dh mentioned it... i think it's just my ovaries that are thinking about it. really. not me.)