help me get my ducks in a row, MY FATHER IS CALLING THE STATE ON ME - Mothering Forums
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#1 of 23 Old 11-15-2003, 04:26 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I cannot express the level of frustration I am feeling right now.

I'm going to call my chiropractor as he has exemption forms for the state of Vermont (do we have a philosophical exemption?).

I want to print up as much as I can and put it in a binder. If anyone can think of some good websites w/specific information, that would be great. Or some links here that provided great info. I will be searching, but right now I'm too busy shaking.

He called what I'm doing child abuse, which is humorous, as he was a child abuser extraordinaire!

Any advice would be helpful. Has anyone worked w/the state of Vermont and how were they?

Okay, I'm babbling, I need to go lie down.

Thanks,
Amy
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#2 of 23 Old 11-15-2003, 05:21 PM
 
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First of all; read this article:

http://www.pacificjustice.org/resour...D=ART513510669

It refers to homeschoolers, but is invaluable to any parent.
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#3 of 23 Old 11-15-2003, 05:26 PM
 
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I'm sorry your father is being such a jerk.

I honestly don't think you have anything to worry about. Not vaccinating is legal. You are the mother. It is your desicion to make. I doubt whoever he calls, will even care (unless he makes other claims at the same time).

Your child is not even a year old. You can safely say that you are delaying vaccs. You can confidently say that you choose not to vaccinate at all. Your father has NO say in this.

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#4 of 23 Old 11-15-2003, 05:42 PM
 
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Melanie,

I must respecfully disagree with you on this. I believe it is best to CYA before any problems come up. Amy has actually been threatened. It is prudent for her to know her rights AND provide documentation of such.
------------------

Amy,

Vermont has all three exemptions. Here is the link to the code:

http://home.san.rr.com/via/STATES/allstates.htm
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#5 of 23 Old 11-15-2003, 05:57 PM
 
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Here is an example affidavit:

VACCINE EXEMPTION FORM

[Insert your state code here. Find it at:

http://home.san.rr.com/via/STATES/allstates.htm


I,____________________________, as the parent of the child _______________________ after considering the risks and benefits of the vaccine(s) do hereby decide not to vaccinate my child with the following vaccines:

Diphtheria
Pertussis
Tetanus
Measles
Mumps
Rubella
Polio
Varicella
Hepatitis B
Prevnar
Anthrax
Smallpox
Haemophilus influenzae type b


This is pursuant to my right to refuse vaccination on the statutory grounds of "other grounds". Pursuant to the statute I am providing a copy of the statement to the child's school administrator or operator of the group program pursuant to (insert code).

Date: ____________________
__________________________________
Parent/Guardian or Person in loco parentis
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#6 of 23 Old 11-15-2003, 06:08 PM
 
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Amy,

I just realized that you are the same mom that posted about your son's eczema & allergies : .

Even with those conditions; It would be simplest to go with the philisophical exemption. If you want a more extensive affidavit then here is a link:

http://www.vaclib.org/legal/refuselt.htm
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#7 of 23 Old 11-15-2003, 07:36 PM
 
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well, if any cps person walked into my house today, they would see that I have taken my son to all his well baby visits.
they would also see my book shelves filled with vax and non vax books.... the only thing I have not done is a binder of stuff...but that's not a bad idea.

if you want a list of stuff to get or add to your info... check out my cheat sheet.

all of the books are reputable and can be purchased on amazon. They are not some random vanity press book.

http://mothering.com/discussions/sho...threadid=57794


also, you may want to go to my cdc link that is at the top of the the cheat sheet thread.

just so your friggin' father knows....as of last week....ending November 14.

there were this many reported cases in the entire united states

measles 43
diptheria 1
mumps 167
rubella 7
tetanus 13

hib cases under 5 years old
sero-b 19 cases
non sero b 79 cases
unknown b 163 cases...

out of a population of over 250 million.

you'll find this onmy first link. print it out, put it in your file.


Your father does not get a christmas present this year.

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#8 of 23 Old 11-15-2003, 08:18 PM
 
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I work for the state of IL in this area and definetly recommend CYA. Not all workers know that you can get an exemption from vaccinations. I'd recommend talking with (or having some call) social services and find out what there by-laws says. In IL there is a policy that says we cannot take kids just because of immunizations but not everyone knows. Make sure they mail you a copy or tell you where to find it to have on hand. Get the section or law or wherever its at so you can show the worker if they show up.
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#9 of 23 Old 11-15-2003, 09:56 PM
 
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I have heard of people being pro-active when they are threatened. I don't have enough information to give you a plan of action, but maybe if I mention it, another mama can give more details.
My memory:
Someone knew their MIL was going to call on them due to a family squable, and reported to CPS, "My mother has threatened to call CPS and report that my children are neglected. She is angry with me due to an unrelated family dispute over money and because I have restricted her access to my children. I would like to have a note of my call added to her complaint, if she does call." Then you would document your call with a letter. It might guarentee you get looked at, but you will anyway if he calls.

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#10 of 23 Old 11-16-2003, 01:01 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Thank you.

My father called me and left me a nasty msg about how insane I would be to think that he would call the state on me. So our relationship may be over, but it looks like I'm safe for right now.

I'm still getting my ducks, not chickens, in a row though. We've had an incredible rough night, my dog bit my son in the face and I'm trying to find a home for him. I'm a little numb as this was my original baby boy (he's a pug). My son is fine, he didn't break the skin, although he meant to and that is all that matters.

I'm going to construct my binder and have it ready. I'm also thinking about getting a crib to keep in our room, just in case. Don't want to seem to alternative. I'm also glad that we go to our well child visit, in fact, we go to our well child visits for this reason only, to CYA.

I'm going to get some of those books Trabot, taking them out from the libaray is different than having them in your house. I also have to get Erin Pavlina's book on "Raising Vegan Children in a NonVegan World", I know she has information on what to do if CPS shows up at your door.

AAHHH. This is undoubtedbly a week from hell.

I have to go to sleep.

Thank you,
Amy
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#11 of 23 Old 11-16-2003, 01:10 AM
 
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#12 of 23 Old 11-16-2003, 11:49 AM
 
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Here goes my paranoia. Istopped my sons visits by 6months, yet attempted to make appointments but the ywere cancelled by the Doc. etc. I gave up. The few non vaxers I know have NO issues with but I am so damn paranoid now! The ysay it ain't illegal to avoid Docs, btu you know what the system sees as good parenting...
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#13 of 23 Old 11-16-2003, 01:39 PM
 
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We haven't been to ds's well child visits since he was 2 months (he's 11 months now). Haven't seen a need to...is this something I should be worried about? Should I take him in for the heck of it? I guess I've not only been avoiding it because he is so incredibly healthy and we've not needed it, but also because I just don't feel like confrontation about not vaxing.
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#14 of 23 Old 11-16-2003, 10:51 PM
 
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Hi,I'm very sorry you are going through this. I had my son taken for 2 weeks by the state of RI. I gave birth to him unassisted and when I called to make a well baby appointment, the dr completely freaked and had him taken.

He was found to have a heart defect(tetralogy of fallot) so even though I had switched peds to one that while he did not agree, supported our decisions, the original ped called CPS again and said he was medically neglected and needed to be removed from us immediatly, even though Gabe was in the hospital at the time!! It's a long story.

Anyway,CPS tried to force vaccinate Gabe. He ended up having one hep b while he was in the hospital, but has never had another vax. He came home at 2 weeks, but we didn't get CPS out of our lives until he was 5 months. They even forced his open heart surgery much sooner than expected, even though we were fully planning on having it done. Thankfully we had an excellent ped cardiologist who fought for us, and got the best surgeon around and Gabe did very well.

My advice to you (I"m not yelling just trying to make this stand out) GET THE LEGAL EXEMPTION FOR YOUR STATE NOW. CPS CANNOT , I REPEAT CANNOT COME INTO YOUR HOME WITHOUT A WARRANT. EVEN IF THEY COME WITH A POLICE OFFICER,THEY NEED A WARRANT. VIDEO AND/OR AUDIOTAPE ALL CONTACT WITH CPS. I did not know this. Stand at the door, preferrably with your child. That way they can see him and see that he is well. Chances are they will not seek a warrant. To make you feel even better, have a lawyer on call. Be very careful with lawyers. My first screwed us completely, I would have had my son back at 10 days instead of 2 weeks as well as had the case dismissed by 2 months had I had a decent lawyer.

Gabe is now 2,and very healthy. He's had surgery at Boston Children's Hospital,as well as developmental testing and a brain MRI a year later,and they never gave me any problems about him not being vaxed. He also gets in home services for some delays,and these workers(4 of them) have never given me any problem,and they are required by law to report any abuse.

I refuse to go into my reasons with any nurse,dr,or social worker. Since RI only has a religious exemption besides medical,I just write no vaccines religious exemption on any paperwork. They cannot ask questions about which religion. No one even bothered us at our local emergency room,when Gabe had to get staples for a cut on his head. I expected to hear it there,and nothing was said. This way he is covered if some nurse decides to vax him against our wishes,we would have a better chance with a lawsuit. Good luck and hang in there. Stay confident in your decision.

Lisa
SAHM to homeschooled Kasia,5, ,and Gabrion,2 ,and wife to Billy

Student mama to one awesome,talented and unique dd,15 and one amazing, sweet and strong ds,12(born with heart defect Tetralogy of Fallot,also on the autism spectrum),9 cats,and 2 gerbils.
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#15 of 23 Old 11-16-2003, 11:50 PM
 
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I wouldn't worry about it. You have the law on your side. Just make sure you have a copy of the law and an exemption form filled out.

Why would your father do such a thing to his own daughter though?

Oh, and what is CYA?
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#16 of 23 Old 11-17-2003, 12:39 AM
 
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Cover your a$$

::
momma to 4
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#17 of 23 Old 11-17-2003, 09:04 AM
 
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Hi I am from vermont also. We do have a philosophical exemption. Try not to worry. I know soooo many mamma's who do not vaccinate. Personally, I think CPS would not pursue this especially in Vermont where people are fiercely protective about their legal rights. where in vermont are you from?
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#18 of 23 Old 11-22-2003, 02:15 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally posted by trabot
well, if any cps person walked into my house today, they would see that I have taken my son to all his well baby visits.
they would also see my book shelves filled with vax and non vax books.... the only thing I have not done is a binder of stuff...but that's not a bad idea.
Trabot,

I wanted to address this part of your post. Did you read the link in my first post on this thread? Let the burden of proof be on them. You do not need to show them anything. Please do not let CPS or police in your house without a warrant.
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#19 of 23 Old 11-23-2003, 03:38 AM
 
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Quote:
I wanted to address this part of your post. Did you read the link in my first post on this thread? Let the burden of proof be on them. You do not need to show them anything. Please do not let CPS or police in your house without a warrant.
gilnikche:

Actually it was a theoretical discussion more than a real heart pounding issue for me. I actually agree with you that the burden would be on CPS. But the facts are that I'm not too worried about it. I was saying it more in a theoretical manner, "If" CPS came in, here is what I know...wellbabyvisits, books..and sure a binder might be a good idea.
But yes I agree that if it really looked like it was going to happen, I'd get a lawyer so fast, and make the burden fall on them.

I don't forsee CPS showing up unless there is a law against a mom wearing sweatpants too many days in a row. If that's the case I'm going to Leavenworth.

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#20 of 23 Old 11-23-2003, 05:07 AM
 
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I did indeed know that it was theoretical. But as one who has been there; I try to help other know what their rights are before any such occurance.
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#21 of 23 Old 11-25-2003, 09:09 PM
 
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CYA = call your attorney

I assume!???
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#22 of 23 Old 11-26-2003, 12:39 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally posted by Gitti
CYA = call your attorney

I assume!???
Hey, I like that ! Not a bad idea either.
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#23 of 23 Old 11-27-2003, 06:46 AM
 
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Quote:
...after considering the risks and benefits of the vaccine(s) do hereby decide not to vaccinate my child with the following vaccines:
you may want to add Hepatitis A to that list, as well. It may not be required in Vermont, but is being added to the "required" list in some states.

I hope this all blows over for you soon. Sorry to hear about your dog.
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