Maiden to Mother Rituals - Mothering Forums

 
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#1 of 13 Old 11-23-2008, 01:35 AM - Thread Starter
 
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I'm having my first child in a coupla months, ie, entering my Mother phase of life. Does anyone know of any or have any ideas of how I can put together a symbolic ritual to mourn my Maiden and welcome my Mother aspect? I'm feeling in need of something to help me with the transition emotionally and psychologically.
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#2 of 13 Old 11-23-2008, 01:36 AM
 
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A Mother Blessing (popularly if incorrectly and inappropriately known as a "Blessingway") type ritual? That's a group thing. Are you thinking more individually?
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#3 of 13 Old 11-23-2008, 01:39 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Although I'd love to do a group thing, I don't know others who share my values in these ways--at least not in person. So yeah, individually if you have any suggestions.

(I'm going to look up a "Blessingway" anyway to see if maybe I can gather some ideas, tho. Thanks!)
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#4 of 13 Old 11-23-2008, 01:40 AM - Thread Starter
 
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BTW Arwyn, that's a RAD siggy quote! That's exactly how I feel!!!
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#5 of 13 Old 11-23-2008, 01:48 AM
 
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Well, maybe not as satisfying, but you could always do one online. For individual, I'd just write me own. I have a few ritual books I use for inspiration, but generally I just like to write things myself. Which is not much help to you.

And thanks, I love it too. I'm actually thinking of getting a bumpersticker with the quote in bold (and normally I don't do bumperstickers; love them, but don't use them, because there's not that much I'm willing to take that much of a stand on).
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#6 of 13 Old 11-23-2008, 01:50 AM
 
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You did mean the marriage part, not the horse part, right?
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#7 of 13 Old 11-23-2008, 01:52 AM - Thread Starter
 
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What sorts of symbols do you think you'd use? I like to write my own, too....but I'm trying to think of what symbols to use to express what I'm feeling. It usually helps to get inspiration from others and then create my own. Especially since I'm still new at ritual writing.
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#8 of 13 Old 11-23-2008, 02:24 AM
 
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Hm... For me, I'd probably honor the Maiden (well, Maiden Mother and Crone, with special emphasis on the Maiden), then burn something representing maidenhood (?), then honor and welcome the Mother. Something involving red : red dye, red candles, red silk. Then, being pregnant, I'd honor and welcome my baby, and state that I am ready to welcome hir when s/he's ready to come.

I'm not sure what would represent maidenhood to me. I keep picturing Diana (I have a Diana flag hanging right next to me at the moment ), but I'm not sure what I would use on an alter for it.
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#9 of 13 Old 11-23-2008, 11:42 AM
 
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Personally, I wouldn't worry about burning anything from my Maiden stage. (No offense Arwyn!) I wouldn't want to totally sever all connections with the "maiden" in me. I would probably try to incorporate both aspects. When I tried to sever all ties with my "Maiden" form, I became very depressed, anxious, and felt very old. When I realized that the maiden was still within me, it was like a weight had been lifted and I stopped trying to suppress her. I feel much more... rounded out now, if that makes sense.

If I were doing the ritual, let's see. I'd set up an altar with three candles, one for the mother, one for the maiden, and one for the crone. At the start of the ritual I would already have the maiden candle burning, and after a prayer or two I would use the maiden candle to light the mother candle, so I would have both burning. The crone I would leave untouched for now, or maybe even cover with a little piece of silk to represent that the lessons of the crone are still veiled. Of course I would probably have more to the ritual than that, but that would be the climax.

Perhaps you could also bless a piece of jewelry to represent this new stage, and then always wear it from now on. An appropriate stone necklace, or one of those necklaces that have a mother's heart and a crystal for the baby inside of it, or a ring, or something of that nature.
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#10 of 13 Old 11-23-2008, 07:03 PM
 
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I wouldn't see it as a severing, just an offering, and a chance to mourn.


ETA I didn't/don't feel any need to mourn or let go of the maiden in me. I feel like I have all three aspects in my at all times, and while one may have primacy at a particular moment, they're never all gone. But the OP was asking for something specific, so I was trying to help brainstorm some options.
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#11 of 13 Old 11-23-2008, 07:11 PM
 
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Hmmmm well i cant really comment on the ritual part however I had a hard time releaseing my maidenhood after I was in Motherhood awhile I realized how much I missed that part of my life. Consequently I got my one and only tattoo of a triquatra on the back right shoulder and it helped my to symoblize the stages of my life and come to terms with it kwim?

Denise, Mama to DS1 (7) and DD1 (5) and new baby due June 2012!

 
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#12 of 13 Old 11-23-2008, 08:11 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks for the suggestions, ladies! I'm taking notes on symbolism and thinking about what it all means to me. Something will form over time.

Hopefully I don"t go mad in the meantime. I know something's goin on cuz I just got done crying like my mother died because I wanted to take a shower and there was no hot water...... :
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#13 of 13 Old 11-27-2008, 01:23 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Arwyn View Post
You did mean the marriage part, not the horse part, right?
Actually...I like the horse part

Mama to 10 so far:Mother of Joey (23), Dominick (15), Abigail (13), Angelo (10), Mylee (8), Delainey (6), Colton (4), ID girls Dahniella and Nicolette (2 in July), and Baby 10 coming sometime in July 2015.
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  If evolution were true, mothers would have three arms!
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