Quiverful Tribe: It's 2009! (Part 1) - Page 5 - Mothering Forums

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#121 of 993 Old 01-29-2009, 07:18 PM
 
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Originally Posted by Kidzaplenty View Post
It's about time for another question of the week, I think!

So, here goes.

Question of the Week:

If you had to picture the "perfect" family (or the one that is the closest to perfect) by using a "famous" family (TV family, historical family, litterary family, or the like) who would you choose and why?
Great question!

My initial response was the Duggars!

Let me think about it...

Mama to 9 so far:Mother of Joey (20), Dominick (13), Abigail (11), Angelo (8), Mylee (6), Delainey (3), Colton (2) and Baby 8 and Baby 9 coming sometime in July 2013.   If evolution were true, mothers would have three arms!

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#122 of 993 Old 02-01-2009, 12:01 PM
 
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Heyla all!

Just a quick reminder that, even when we disagree with a person's individual beliefs, the Spirituality Forum is not the place to debate these differences. According to the Spirituality Forum guidelines:

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The Spirituality board is a forum of support, respectful requests of information, and sharing of faith and practice. To uphold this purpose the board will not host discussions of debate or criticism. Disagreements about spiritual issues should be set aside out of respect for the diversity and varying interpretations and beliefs that we hold as a community.

While we will not restrict discussions to persons of the faith being discussed we will be active in discouraging an individual from posting for the purpose of disagreement, with no interest in practicing the faith or belief in discussion, or to prove a faith or a belief to be wrong, misguided, or not based on fact. Prosletyzing, to convert to a faith or from one, will not be permitted. Controversial subjects of discussion related to spiritual and religious beliefs and origins can be found elsewhere on the internet and we invite you to seek out other sites for that purpose.
And of course, no matter the forum, the MDC User Agreement guidelines remain in effect:

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Thank you again for your patience, please feel free to PM me with any questions or concerns, and enjoy your tribe!

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#123 of 993 Old 02-01-2009, 06:35 PM
 
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Hi mamas! After a recent m/c DH and I are preparing to give our fertility up to God! We have had several fertility controlling mishaps, that perhaps I will get into on a later date. We do fundamentally believe that fertility is not ours to 'control' but we/more like I have really been uptight about some 'natural' b/c for most of our marriage.

I have to be released from pelvic rest and perhaps straighten out a small toxin/health issue, but after that, it is totally on. I have such a sense of peace about it! No more worrying!

As to the BF topic, I am nursing an almost 3 year old right now. Not a ton, but it is something I think about because AF stayed away for 2 years with him. I did not expect that and though I was initially against weaning to regain fertility, I don't know quite what to do given that my fertility seems so responsive to BF . . . I haven't been BF for BC, I just love the health benefits/comfort he is getting from it and did want to practice child led weaning. I also generally feel that in ancestral times women nursed MUCH longer than we now think is normal. Definitely don't want to debate, just sharing my motivations for BF this long.

I have had a regular cycle though since he was 2 and did get pregnant the first time I tried, so it seems that I can BF and conceive after a (long) point. I guess I am trying to strike a balance between weaning being a form of 'control' and BF being a form of 'control' kwim?
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#124 of 993 Old 02-01-2009, 06:44 PM
 
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I'm on bed rest. I knew this was a big possibility and I had prayed it wouldn't happen... But here I am. Strict bed rest is so hard when you have a toddler who wants to play with you. But with my cervix misbehaving, I just have to lay around and take my nifedipine and thank God for each day I don't go into labor. I'm over a week further along than I was when I had my daughter.

And as for the QOTW....
If you had to picture the "perfect" family (or the one that is the closest to perfect) by using a "famous" family (TV family, historical family, litterary family, or the like) who would you choose and why?

I think I'm going to need some time to think about that one.

Bri: mom to K: and M: at 27 weeks and 33 weeks :
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#125 of 993 Old 02-01-2009, 07:00 PM
 
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[QUOTE=momtokimari;13109249]I'm on bed rest. I knew this was a big possibility and I had prayed it wouldn't happen... But here I am. Strict bed rest is so hard when you have a toddler who wants to play with you. But with my cervix misbehaving, I just have to lay around and take my nifedipine and thank God for each day I don't go into labor. I'm over a week further along than I was when I had my daughter.
QUOTE]

I'm sorry to hear you are on bedrest! That must be so hard with an active young one. I will keep you all in my prayers!

Rachel, proud Army wife to my superhero.gif and SAHM to my crazy boys jumpers.gif... Trevor 4/08, Trenton 6/09 and Travis 10/10
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#126 of 993 Old 02-01-2009, 08:51 PM
 
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I met a QF lady at church today! ::::

We always felt alone on that issue. She's also from a "mixed" family (Malaysian and Thai) and is in a biracial marriage, and they courted rather than dated, and has a background much like dh's. We are *definately* having them to our house sometime soon.
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#127 of 993 Old 02-01-2009, 09:42 PM
 
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[QUOTE=chely7425;13109354]
Quote:
Originally Posted by momtokimari View Post
I'm on bed rest. I knew this was a big possibility and I had prayed it wouldn't happen... But here I am. Strict bed rest is so hard when you have a toddler who wants to play with you. But with my cervix misbehaving, I just have to lay around and take my nifedipine and thank God for each day I don't go into labor. I'm over a week further along than I was when I had my daughter.
QUOTE]

I'm sorry to hear you are on bedrest! That must be so hard with an active young one. I will keep you all in my prayers!
Thank you.

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I met a QF lady at church today! ::::

We always felt alone on that issue. She's also from a "mixed" family (Malaysian and Thai) and is in a biracial marriage, and they courted rather than dated, and has a background much like dh's. We are *definately* having them to our house sometime soon.
Awesome.

Bri: mom to K: and M: at 27 weeks and 33 weeks :
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#128 of 993 Old 02-02-2009, 01:06 AM
 
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Originally Posted by cappuccinosmom View Post
I met a QF lady at church today! ::::

We always felt alone on that issue. She's also from a "mixed" family (Malaysian and Thai) and is in a biracial marriage, and they courted rather than dated, and has a background much like dh's. We are *definately* having them to our house sometime soon.
That is so cool!! I wish we had more friends who didn't think we were a tad nutty

Rachel, proud Army wife to my superhero.gif and SAHM to my crazy boys jumpers.gif... Trevor 4/08, Trenton 6/09 and Travis 10/10
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#129 of 993 Old 02-02-2009, 08:51 AM
 
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I met a QF lady at church today! ::::

We always felt alone on that issue. She's also from a "mixed" family (Malaysian and Thai) and is in a biracial marriage, and they courted rather than dated, and has a background much like dh's. We are *definately* having them to our house sometime soon.
That really is cool! I wish I knew some QF people IRL. Seems I am the only one I know of that even knows what the term means.

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#130 of 993 Old 02-02-2009, 09:04 AM
 
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Question of the Week:

If you had to picture the "perfect" family (or the one that is the closest to perfect) by using a "famous" family (TV family, historical family, litterary family, or the like) who would you choose and why?
I have had to think about this. As simple as the question was to write, it really is not simple to answer, is it?

I think I would have to choose the Ingles family. Not that they are "perfect" but they were my "wanna be just like them" family growing up.

If I could have climbed through the TV or into the books to be Laura, I would have. Strange, I know.

They always seemed to "fix" every problem with kindness and ingenuity not too common today. And there did not seem to be anything that could not be done. I like that.

My other choice would have to be Eight is Enough family. Only because I really liked that show years ago. And I always wanted many children.

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#131 of 993 Old 02-02-2009, 09:06 AM
 
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I'm on bed rest. I knew this was a big possibility and I had prayed it wouldn't happen... But here I am. Strict bed rest is so hard when you have a toddler who wants to play with you. But with my cervix misbehaving, I just have to lay around and take my nifedipine and thank God for each day I don't go into labor. I'm over a week further along than I was when I had my daughter.
Hoping for a sticky baby for you (at least until closer to EDD). Seems many that have gotten "sticky vibes" because of early labor stuff end up going "over due". So, here's hoping for "semi-sticky" vibes!

Any misspellings or grammatical errors in the above statement are intentional;
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#132 of 993 Old 02-02-2009, 09:57 AM
 
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I love Laura Ingalls Wilder too!

Just posting an intro - I'm Akie, currently pregnant and separated from my husband, but also LDS *Mormon*. Are there any LDS church members like me who also agree with many of the QF beliefs?

I hope to have more children, whether with this husband or another, but am unsure if this will happen. It is likely that even if stbx and I stay together he will not want more children, which I do not agree with.

Akie, single mom to M (02/18/06), E (08/04/07) and Z (06/22/09)
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#133 of 993 Old 02-02-2009, 10:06 AM
 
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Oh, and growing up I loved to watch "Just the Ten of Us". Does anyone remember that show? I loved how diverse the family was - strictly Catholic, but the children were all so different, and that's okay.

Akie, single mom to M (02/18/06), E (08/04/07) and Z (06/22/09)
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#134 of 993 Old 02-02-2009, 10:37 AM
 
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I know I'm late for last week's QOTW, but I wanted to answer anyway. A few close friends know, but most people don't. When people ask if we're having more, or ask how many we plan to have, I say we figure it out one baby at a time. I'm not really comfortable discussing this aspect of our marriage while making small talk. But I'm pretty introverted. I do sometimes think about saying something about us just waiting for the next baby to show up, but I generally chicken out. I belong to a church that encourages big families, but it is very rare nowadays to find a family who doesn't use b/c to plan when their big family happens. I'm just glad that there are still a few families with more kids than ours has!

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It's just not fair to blame individual mothers for problematic attitudes in which our whole society is deeply entrenched.
I just wanted to quote this because I think it's a great point.

As for this week's QOTW... my first thought was the Ingalls family, too, from the books. I'll try to think of someone else. How about Jo and... Fritz? whatever his name was, in Little Men. I like how they had a balance of book learning and hands-on work experiences. The laid-back attitude that Jo has, letting the kids do their own thing so much, while still being in the lead is wonderful. I find that balance difficult.

I'm at the point now where I'm often wondering if I could be pg, though I'm much more calm about it than I used to be. I don't even have any pg tests in the house! AF returned a few months ago, and it's always very light, so I'm wondering if it's actually my period, or maybe it's lunar spotting. And my youngest is about a month shy of the age my oldest was when #2 was conceived. So I wouldn't feel overwhelmed if we conceived now. I think.

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#135 of 993 Old 02-02-2009, 11:10 AM
 
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I'd be more inclined to assume it was just the little girl talking. (Leave it to me to assume the best.)

See, I am not in any type of "competition", I don't TTC. My children all know this. We will have another baby if and when God gives one to us. Yet, I have heard my own children ask others how many children they have. They also like to "shock" people in public by telling them the "number" of children not with us at the time. (Like, "You think FIVE is a lot, we have NINE altogether!" And then they will go on to tell them all about those at home as well as those no longer with us.) It is like a game with them. They think it is cool to be one of the only families they know with so many children.
LOL, we were the same way in my family. We were just competitive about everything.

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#136 of 993 Old 02-02-2009, 11:31 AM
 
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Glad the thread is back.

I can't think of any TV or literary families I identify with. Sorry, no fun!

Akie, we're LDS, too.

DH and I talked about family planning recently and it was a really great talk. DH is on board with "leaving the door open" and "leaving it up to God" (which to him means praying about family planning before making a decision, but that's good!) and he doesn't think I'm crazy. So that was exciting. Now I just need to work through my own fears!

♥ blogger astrologer mom to three cool kiddos, and trying to figure out this divorce thing-- Blossom and Glow ♥

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#137 of 993 Old 02-02-2009, 03:29 PM
 
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Hoping for a sticky baby for you (at least until closer to EDD). Seems many that have gotten "sticky vibes" because of early labor stuff end up going "over due". So, here's hoping for "semi-sticky" vibes!
Thank you. I'm hoping he stays in long enough for a home birth. I trust that God will give me another healthy child. This is going to make it hard for people to be supportive and happy for us when we have more though.... I apparently don't have the best cervix and will need to be stitched closed for subsequent pregnancies. And people think that having more preemies is selfish. Of course, my mom did offer to carry some for me. So she's not that opposed to more grandbabies.

Bri: mom to K: and M: at 27 weeks and 33 weeks :
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#138 of 993 Old 02-03-2009, 12:42 AM
 
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I think I missed something :

Mama to 9 so far:Mother of Joey (20), Dominick (13), Abigail (11), Angelo (8), Mylee (6), Delainey (3), Colton (2) and Baby 8 and Baby 9 coming sometime in July 2013.   If evolution were true, mothers would have three arms!

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#139 of 993 Old 02-03-2009, 09:35 AM
 
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I'm LDS, too, akichan

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#140 of 993 Old 02-03-2009, 01:10 PM
 
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I think I missed something :

Me Too

Hi everyone, haven't been on here in a long time. I am so so glad these threads are still going
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#141 of 993 Old 02-03-2009, 02:29 PM
 
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Well, not much has happened. Question of the week posted. Thread locked. Thread unlocked. Question of the week answered. Plus other odds and ends. That's about all!

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#142 of 993 Old 02-05-2009, 12:25 AM
 
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Hi Mamas,

Checking in here with news of a new baby :

Our second blessing arrived two weeks prior to his due date, surprising us all (I went three weeks over with DS1). He is healthy and amazing, praise God. His name is Linus Kenneth Neil and he was born on January 28th weighing 7lbs 13oz and 19.75" long.

I have been mostly lurking here recently but I wanted to share our exciting news. He is quite a blessing and we are all over the moon.

Alison
Mama to Toad (08/06), Frog (01/09)... and new baby Newt born on his due date, Sep. 8, 2010
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#143 of 993 Old 02-05-2009, 12:52 AM
 
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Chely/Rachel,

Response to your question: we are using "natural" methods of BC. I'm just paying attention to my body, I haven't even charted or anything, but I know when I'm fertile and when I'm not. We don't engage in activities when I know I'm ovulating. Luckily, my cycles are very regular.

As for the QOTW: I really liked the Ingalls family. I just read "The Long Winter" which I haven't read since childhood and really enjoyed the simplicity of their lives. I also got a kick out the mother continuing the children's lessons even though they were snowed in. No such thing as "snow days" back then, revert back to "homeschooling" methods!

Glad to see the thread back! I was panicking for a few days here!
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#144 of 993 Old 02-05-2009, 09:30 AM
 
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Congratulations, Alison!

I don't think I noticed your location before. I'm in Ottawa.

Mom to DS(14), DS(12), DD(9), DS(6), DS (4), and DS(2)  

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#145 of 993 Old 02-05-2009, 09:46 AM
 
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can anyone point me in the right direction for larger homeschooling families please? thank you

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#146 of 993 Old 02-05-2009, 10:39 AM
 
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Congratulations, Alison!

I don't think I noticed your location before. I'm in Ottawa.
That's awesome! We're in Belleville, but my mother in law lives in Ottawa :

Alison
Mama to Toad (08/06), Frog (01/09)... and new baby Newt born on his due date, Sep. 8, 2010
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#147 of 993 Old 02-06-2009, 02:58 AM
 
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: I just wrote this all out... and then accidentally hit "undo" so I have to start ALL OVER. Now it's going to be just facts and not the cute story-like version I was going to give.

I just got home from the hospital today. I went in on Tuesday for my u/s to check my cervical length and it had shrunk to 1.5cm. So the doctor called L&D and sent me over right away. They strapped me to some monitors, and hooked me up to magnesium sulfate and gave me some steroid shots. Anyway, the contractions stopped after a while, and this morning another u/s showed my cervix as having lengthened to 2.5cm! : So I got to go home. Now I'm on modified bed rest at home and on terbutaline. If you've never taken terb... I don't recommend it. Makes you feel like you drank a starbucks out of business. Every 4 hours. Yeah. Fun stuff. ::sarcasm:: In any case.... This little set back has cause our friends and family to give their 2 cents about whether or not we should continue reproducing. After all, we've got "The Set" and I'm obviously not good at keeping babies in. This isn't fair to my older kid(s) and it can't be good for me or the baby to have to take these drugs. So why not have my husband get "snipped"? Seriously. How is it ok to just suggest vasectomies to people? I wouldn't walk around telling someone they should PIERCE their genitals, why should you tell them to render them impotent? This is of course frustrating, but I expected it after the doctor said that I'd need a cerclage for any future pregnancies. What is more frustrating and less expected... My husband is actually considering this! He said he wouldn't do it without my blessing... But... what??? How were we just talking about 6 kids and now we're talking surgery to prevent them?

What if my husband really wants this? Like, really really wants it? He's not particularly convicted (since he is kinda wishy-washy in the faith department) and was just going along with being QF because it made me happy... but he does seem to share the idea that it's selfish to birth more kids. Is it better to listen to my heart or my husband? Especially since I've always felt called to adoption anyway. But if I wasn't meant to have more kids... why am I perfectly capable of conceiving them, despite the fact that I can't seem to get them to stay in there? And then there's the feelings I know I shouldn't have, but I need to work through. Why do the people who DON'T want their kids have the easiest time of things? They get pregnant easily, have easy pregnancies, easy births and then just go about their lives. Sometimes after giving the child to someone else... Sometimes after growing up and taking responsibility. But I did this the right way! I was married, I've wanted kids forever. How is this fair? And do I have a right to complain? No. I don't. At least I can have them. God was gracious enough to give me children.

If you read this far... You are up for sainthood. And I just think I need some prayer. I know it'll all work out. I just wish I knew how it was going to work out ahead of time so I didn't need to worry about it.

Bri: mom to K: and M: at 27 weeks and 33 weeks :
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#148 of 993 Old 02-06-2009, 09:22 AM
 
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Bri, hopefully this is just all part of the stress of what's going on now and the thought of troublesome pregnancies in the future. Your dh is probably very concerned about you, and a lot of doctors looooove to do the dead wife/dead baby thing while they're doing a little social engingeering on the side. : Concentrate on this baby right now and let the fear and stress blow over, and then start worrying. I know a couple of ladies who's husband's were scared out of their wits by doctors and who later sorely regreted their sterilizations. Just because he's thinking aobut it now doesn't mean it's set in stone yet.
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#149 of 993 Old 02-06-2009, 10:34 AM
 
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MOMTOKIMARI DH got the "with the economy the way it is, when are one of you getting snipped" speech last night. AT A FUNERAL no less.
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#150 of 993 Old 02-06-2009, 11:47 AM
 
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Originally Posted by momtokimari View Post
If you read this far... You are up for sainthood. And I just think I need some prayer. I know it'll all work out. I just wish I knew how it was going to work out ahead of time so I didn't need to worry about it.

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transtichel.gifMom of three - (2.5 yrs, 7yrs, and 11yrs). Birthing Doula, editor, and wife to my soulmate. I've had a c/s, hospital VBAC, UC and not yet decided what I'll do about this next little one

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