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#121 of 519 Old 08-09-2009, 03:41 PM
 
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Originally Posted by CrescentC View Post
Just a quick post to say.....I got the house!!
Yay! : tell all! what's it like? I can't believe we're going to be in this house TWO YEARS this October! How time flies.

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Originally Posted by mary3mama View Post
Yeah, I think quiet (silence being soooooo hard to come by) is my ideal recharge technique. I sent everyone off to play for the half hour or so after the friends left. I was beginning to have a terrible headache (which I always get in situations like that) and just needed to be alone and not touched for a few minutes.

It didn't help that my very easily over-stimulated eldest child was horrible during the first hour or so of the playdate. He's 10 and has neurochemical issues that emerge when he's stressed or overstimulated. I had to sit with him next to me or in my lap for about an hour to help him cope and calm down. After that, he seemed to get himself organized and played with everyone as if nothing had happened. {{snort}}

That's one of the reasons that having friends over is so overwhelming to me, I believe. I have to expend a ton of my energy just absorbing, redirecting and transmuting his.
I so hear you. Not being touched is a thing I need, too, when I'm recharging. My ds has ADHD in a huge, huge way, and so I understand (in a different way) about helping my child cope and organize. At gatherings, he's way overstimulated and can tend to be, well, just bouncing off the walls, literally.
Yesterday wasn't actually too bad. We were the first and only birthday party in the Huge Cavernous Game Room, and they didn't have the huge screen TVs (srsly, one is wall-sized) with Cartoon Network on all that loudly. We could actually talk over it!

Still, when I got home-- we were there from 11am to nearly 2pm!-- it took me till 4:30 to get myself any functional at all. Could have used LOTS longer, but had a friend over for food, because she was watching ds while I went to the ritual, and then left her dd here overnight so she could go out.

The ritual was awesome!! All golden and yellow and bread and wheat and corn. We all got our hands ritually washed and blessed, and there was dough, and we each kneaded 3 blessings into it, and it's going to be our Cakes for the Mabon rite

But I had a horrid night's sleep because when I got ds up to pee-- usually, he's asleep and utterly unaware-- he was combative and kept grabbing onto things and not letting go, so as to keep me from taking him to the bathroom. I had to pry his fingers off of the bed, the ladder to the top bunk, the covers. As soon as I pried one appendage off, he'd grab with another. He remembers none of this, but at the time, it was freaky! So I took him into my bed, and he was totally restless all night long. I slept like cr*p.

Needless to say, I am trying to recover, today. Ds was wanting a ton of attention earlier, but I'm getting some precious quiet time right now!

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Originally Posted by wombatclay View Post
Given how depressed I was about this just a few weeks ago I feel really really blessed. And I've got to figure out some sort of thank you gift. Maybe some local beers and a gift for the team leader's new grandchild?

Recharging/Chaos- I've become a fan of head covering and modified headcovering as a means of creating private space and protecting my own energy/keeping other energy out. There's a thread in Religious Studies that talks about pagan-specific head covering actually with a lot of different opinions about it/how to do it/why to do it. For me a scarf or wrap is a good way to sort of remind myself to maintain focus (sort of like my seasonal beads) as well as a sort of "shield" or "umbrella" to keep unwanted energies out.
I'd say that yes, maybe a case of local beer and a pizza party for them? On their last day? THey do sound like the dream guys!

Head covering...that sounds like a great idea, but I can't stand things on my head! I am weird about putting it up/wearing it down-- I'm vain about my hair, so I wear it down all the time when I'm out, but at home, I'm constantly putting it up in a ponytail with a scrunchy, and taking it down, and putting it up, and taking it down...not for looks, but because whichever style it's in will start to drive my head nuts after a bit

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We are having a fabulous time, the beach trip was the highlight of it.. I'll be sure to share pics after I get home & settled. I have 3 days left here
Cari! Yay!
If you pop on one more time...remember to *be here now*. Be in the moment, and don't think about leaving till it's TIME to leave. Think about your presence *in the moment*! Hugs and safe journey, when it's time!

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I was wondering if you all have any techniques for how to calm yourselves down when you're feeling stressed out in the moment. When you feel like you might lose your temper or get really frustrated
Still working on that one! I'm not very good at it. When I am, I usually have to yell to get ds's attention, just to tell him that I have to go take a time-out. And I go in my room, and shut the door, or make him stay in his room while I go outside. Usually that kind/level of stress is in direct proportion to the level of badness of ds's behavior, so he's usually by that time crying, so I go outside to not hear it so I can calm down. His tantruming will almost always escalate my stress level. I need silence (see above post about recharging ) so I have to get away from the crying to be able to come back to myself.
When I'm out there, or in my room, I close my eyes and deep breathe. Well-- outside I don't usually close my eyes. I watch and listen to Nature just being Herself. That usually calms me pretty quickly. Well....calmer.

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So today, my body has told me it is ready to start again. Nice to know It also told that I'm holding a lot of tension in my jaw.

The energy here is anticipation...for the last few days, we have been told about this very hot weather tomorrow and the thunderstorms...everyone seems to be talking about it, waiting for it to happen.
Ready to start what again? How did it tell you those things? :

I love, love, love the anticipatory energy of a good storm. In fourteen years on the Outer Banks I never left for hurricanes at all. The only time I considered it, it was...I think Fran?...which took a path from the south, curved west, then continued north, so any direction we could have taken to avert it would have put us right in its path.
When we had hurricanes, I usually was on the beach It was always fun to watch the surfers and the news crews!

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So I found a copy of Hogfather at a garage sale for fifty cents and it's really fun! I rarely get into fiction but and particularly science fiction, but I couldn't resist it for that price since it's been mentioned here so often.
OK, where was I? What is this of which you speak?

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Originally Posted by wombatclay View Post
My "immediate cleaning, house must look good fast" trick is to grab some of those pretty paper "gift bags" (our dollar store sells them in packs of three for a dollar, but you can find them everywhere) and cram everything into the bags.
HOLY COW, wombat, that is the most brilliant idea I've ever heard!! How do you come up with these things?? Sigh...of course, if I did that, ds would be constantly thinking they were presents and trying to open them but I may just do that!! Decluttering a small gift bag actually sounds doable. Even if there were tons of them, I could do just one!

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#122 of 519 Old 08-09-2009, 03:57 PM
 
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Oh, I don't have a bell for the salt-n-bell cleansing... what could I use instead?
A chime; singing bowl; an xylophone, triangle; or even gently clinking a spoon against a glass 3 times (per room).

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#123 of 519 Old 08-09-2009, 04:55 PM
 
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wow i missed alot. my electricity was acting up so i couldnt get online for days. like 4 days i think. but my dad came over and him and DH found the loose wire and it is all good now. i am not sure if i can read all that that i missed. lol.

i am living with Gestational Diabetes. so that is going. also i am 30 weeks now. and am going to get my doc to write a script for a support garment. having serious pubic bone issues.

i havent been feeling "witchy" lately. i dont trust my intuition. i feel in a funk.

hugs to everybody. i might stay off the pc for another few days to rest.

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#124 of 519 Old 08-09-2009, 09:01 PM
 
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DOK- I plan to clean and purge tomorrow. The goal being- get all the stuff I am getting rid of out of the house and to the salvation army. (geez, typing salvation army feels and sounds so weird...anyway) I plan to cleanse once the space is clear and spend time adding only the elements back in that really speak to me, the girls and the school kids. (did I mention, the school is going to be in my house for a year?)

Mary- everytime I read your posts I realize that I am jut not tuned in like that. I want to be and occasionally am. When Erin was conceived, I knew she would be early, like 2-3 weeks. I was positive of my dates, and she was born 2 days after the official due date- however, my midwife said she had all the characteristics of a 37week old baby. So, was that my instinct realizing that she would cook slower?

Clay- yep we do the same thing.

I have been wearing a stone bracelet that i got at the medieval faire and it literally helps me feel grounded, which makes sense since it is a string of rocks.

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#125 of 519 Old 08-09-2009, 10:39 PM
 
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DOK- (did I mention, the school is going to be in my house for a year?)
No, I didn't know that. I've tried sending you emails but haven't heard back from you.

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#126 of 519 Old 08-09-2009, 10:42 PM
 
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dok- hrmmm? really? I promise, I am not ignoring you.

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#127 of 519 Old 08-09-2009, 10:53 PM
 
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dok- hrmmm? really? I promise, I am not ignoring you.
I think it's my email addy. A few other people have said they haven't received any emails from me for months!

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#128 of 519 Old 08-10-2009, 12:50 AM - Thread Starter
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Maia - I believe Clay was the first to mention Hogfather, the movie version because she likes to see it every yule season on the cable station ION.

Peace- Heather
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#129 of 519 Old 08-10-2009, 08:26 AM
 
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My mother decided to change her plans and she coming for an overnight visit TODAY...2 days earlier than originally planned! Eeek!

I had all my cleaning plans in place and now I have to try to clean the house in a few hours instead of a couple of days. Um, yeah, right.

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#130 of 519 Old 08-10-2009, 08:32 AM
 
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Morning mamas. How is everyone doing? I don't have time to catch up this morning, but will try later tonight. I have a house full of company and have been running all over town for almost 2 weeks. We are on our way to Boston today. Hope everyone has a great day.

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#131 of 519 Old 08-10-2009, 09:06 AM
 
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Originally Posted by Aeress View Post
Mary- everytime I read your posts I realize that I am jut not tuned in like that. I want to be and occasionally am. When Erin was conceived, I knew she would be early, like 2-3 weeks. I was positive of my dates, and she was born 2 days after the official due date- however, my midwife said she had all the characteristics of a 37week old baby. So, was that my instinct realizing that she would cook slower?
I'd imagine so.
We're all tuned in in our own unique ways, KWIM?
Where I am now...what I sense and what I know...is so different from where I was 2 years ago. It's constantly changing, evolving, helping me to become whatever it is that I am destined to be and/or learn during this time on the planet.

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#132 of 519 Old 08-10-2009, 09:24 AM
 
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The ritual was awesome!! All golden and yellow and bread and wheat and corn. We all got our hands ritually washed and blessed, and there was dough, and we each kneaded 3 blessings into it, and it's going to be our Cakes for the Mabon rite
That ritual sounds lovely! Glad to hear it went well!

In terms of what my body is doing to tell me it is ready to start again...by that I meant start trying again to conceive another baby, after the ectopic pregnancy we just had. Emotionally, the healing was actually much faster than we anticipated. I had a feeling right from the start that something was off...and shortly after, I had a dream of a developing fetus in a "bubble" that popped. Of course, follow that up with a ruptured fallopian tube and that should have been my hint. The reason I know is that I actually had a pretty average cycle, for the first time since DD was born (2 yrs ago). Even my body temps are higher than they were (they were in the 35.5-35.9 range pre-ovulation, and low 36's if I was lucky after). Now they are right where they should be...it makes me wonder why, but I am thankful...and now we are on cycle day 3 and I don't mind a bit This month or next would be great but ultimately, it will happen when it is meant to happen.

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Mary- everytime I read your posts I realize that I am jut not tuned in like that. I want to be and occasionally am. When Erin was conceived, I knew she would be early, like 2-3 weeks. I was positive of my dates, and she was born 2 days after the official due date- however, my midwife said she had all the characteristics of a 37week old baby. So, was that my instinct realizing that she would cook slower?

Clay- yep we do the same thing.

I have been wearing a stone bracelet that i got at the medieval faire and it literally helps me feel grounded, which makes sense since it is a string of rocks.
I agree! It sounds wonderful to be that receptive (I'm sure it has it's challenges too though). I am certainly working on that! Dreams are my way to really see things so far. I had a few dreams while pregnant with DD where she was a blonde curly haired, blue eyed little girl. We didn't find out if she was a boy or girl and everyone was concinced boy...I knew she was a girl (and she does have blue eyes...her hair is brown right now but there are huge blonde streaks. Both DH and I started with dark hair, had bright blonde hair as kids, and now our hair is darker again...same with my dad).

Aeress - same here. I even told my midwife that I thought she was coming pre-term at one of our appointments. Two weeks later, on the day where we had our appointment (35 weeks, 4 days) DD was born (and she was also smaller than the average 35 weeker).

Here, we saw an amazing lightning show. It was just incredible. We turned off lights and other electronics and lit candles and watched the storm. After DD went to sleep, DH and I played scrabble by candlelight, it was a good time

I also got a message from my mom on my cell/work phone wanting to talk about my youngest sister. Now here is the background story - she was always pretty emotionally abusive growing up, and yep got spanked...a lot. She hated when I reached out for help. My dad was also abusive but left when I was 12. Fast forward to when we were expecting DD...we were trying to find a nice house but nothing was what we wanted. She had a house she bought for my (middle) sister to live in while in college, and she said we could stay there and just pay utilities etc. Good deal? Well my sister was supposed to stay the summer to finish work, then move home...she never did. She also never cleaned anything...fruit flies everywhere, it was disgusting. DHs family came over after DD was born after Christmas and we were up playing board games one night. My sister was leaving the door open and just letting whoever come over! My mom didn't want anything to do with it, even though she had told us other things. My sister was also stealing money for whatever she wanted out of the house account. So the next day, with the help of DHs family, we packed up everything we had, moved to where we are, and haven't told anyone. It has been the most peaceful things we could have ever done.

She wants me to call...I don't want to. I'm so over the desire to see her proud of me someday. I was never good enough. Even when I was in labour, she came to the hospital and told DHs family that I was so independent, she could just strangle me...lovely

Anyways, I have a work meeting at 10, so I better shower. I welcome any thoughts

Nicole: mama to DD and DS, childbirth educator and doula. Dancing the spiral dance of life bellycast.gif

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#133 of 519 Old 08-10-2009, 11:21 AM
 
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I've been out of town for awhile.

Congrats on the house Crescent!

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#134 of 519 Old 08-10-2009, 11:29 AM
 
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Morning Mamas!

We had a FANTASTIC adventure yesterday.

The heat has finally gotten me. Nearly 100 degrees for Sunday/Monday/Tuesday this week. That's the first time it's gotten anywhere near that hot this whole summer. So we were looking for something to do that was COOL. DH's solution: one of several local cave/cavern tourist spots.

So we went to Luray Caverns in Virginia (not too far from home) and enjoyed being underground for a while.

Here's something I wrote in my personal blog/journal this morning:

Quote:
I found it deeply inspiring to be within Mother Earth.
We humans spend most of our time upon the earth and sometimes above (tall buildings/airplanes) but rarely ever within the earth.

This was deeply spiritual for me…to be within Mother Earth and within such beauty. It was cool, wet, dark and completely harmonious.

As we proceeded to the lowest level…the depths of this great cavern…I was given the inspiration to ‘rebirth’ through the experience.

Although most of the passages down to the deep were fairly wide, the ones back up were fairly narrow. As we walked up the narrow ramps with darkness and dampness and the walls of the earth on either side, I thought of birthing.

When the walkways required more effort, I remembered the effort that it takes to birth. When the walkways evened out, I remembered that during labor there are active and less active times.

I said, ‘I am leaving behind my last birth…into a family that didn’t honor or cherish me.’ ‘I am choosing to move fully and finally into this family of my choosing and making knowing that here I am loved, honored and cherished.’

It was a powerful time.
Tears came to my eyes multiple times. My throat closed several times. It didn't feel contrived or artificial at all. It just felt right
.

Words cannot fully capture how deeply spiritual this was for me. To be WITHIN the earth and then to consciously choose to be reborn. Awe-inspiring.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
As for being 'in tune' I need to tell you about my maternal grandmother, Gertie. She was a dear soul and my only trusted-adult as a child. She was also quite 'sensitive.' She never thought of herself as psychic, nor would allow anyone else to. But she was very in-tune with everyone around her...always knew when women would be getting pg, or when the baby would be born, always knew the baby's gender, frequently knew when and how people were going to die.

It was extraordinary...but just part of her normal life. When I would ask her about it (when I was a teenager and could start to realize how unusual this was) she would tell me that she was given messages 'from the holy spirit' and that her job was just to receive the messages, sometimes share them, other times just prepare herself and others for what was to come. She was a deeply-religious-conservative woman. And I respected her for that...she lived what she spoke and was never a hypocrite about any of it.

She passed away one month before my eldest child was conceived -- and I think the timing is important. I do not believe that she is the spirit of my eldest...but I do think she was watching over me and helped to end our 18 months of infertility in some way.

So, the deeper connected I get to the Great Spirit/Goddess/Mother Earth the more I start to understand what Gertie was saying. I do not think I have some incredibly unusual ability. I am not a medium, nor a psychic. But I can be open to the messages and impressions that the Spirit wishes me to have/understand.

I don't think this is unique. I do believe, quite fervently, that every individual will receive messages of guidance and love and 'rightness' and some sort of future foretelling if they are connected to whatever Spirit resonates within them.

Part of my learning-curve lately is about respecting the limits of these messages/impressions especially with regards to mis-interpreting. I need to just let them flow through me without trying to make them logical or understandable. The impressions will unfold in degrees when I allow them to BE.

I've also been given very clear messages about not feeling the need to 'fix' other people (like DH) but rather letting them go on their path as they need to. This is a hard one for me, when I see DH stressing I want to send out vibrations to fix his situation.

I have to repeat the following mantra inside my head/heart: "All is as it should be."

I think I'll make it a habit to keep connected all month long in little ways, but to go outside and talk with the Full Moon each month for recharge/reconnection.

For daily rituals, I try to sing this to myself every morning...as soon as my eyes open:

Quote:
Good Morning Father Sun,
Good Morning Mother Earth,
We thank you for the stars and night,
we thank you for our birth
And then when I am in bed and settling in to sleep:

Quote:
Good Evening Mother Earth,
Good Evening Father Sun,
We thank you for this day we've lived
and all the ones to come.
Very simple. But very effective for me.

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#135 of 519 Old 08-10-2009, 11:36 AM
 
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Hey all- I'm back! We had a great time on our camping trip, it was so relaxing. I swam in the lake for hours every day.

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There is an amazing thunderstorm here right now. I wish you all could see it. It feels very cleansing, I love it!
We experienced that thunderstorm- that's the night we packed up and headed home. ( we were in ID, and came through Spokane, down a bit, home.)

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I just got word that the baby has dropped and so may be coming sooner than expected. The EDD is 9/21. So, Yikes! (BTW we are prospective adoptive parents.) Now I am nesting more than ever and trying to think of the BEST baby name to boot!
Yay! I hope the birth goes well and you have your new babe in your arms soon! What names have you come up with???

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Just a quick post to say.....I got the house!! :::

Inspection will be Monday and if everything looks good, we will close at the end of September! :
Wonderful! How exciting- I hope the inspection goes great today.

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Originally Posted by LionessMom View Post
wow i missed alot. my electricity was acting up so i couldnt get online for days. like 4 days i think. but my dad came over and him and DH found the loose wire and it is all good now. i am not sure if i can read all that that i missed. lol.

i am living with Gestational Diabetes. so that is going. also i am 30 weeks now. and am going to get my doc to write a script for a support garment. having serious pubic bone issues.

i havent been feeling "witchy" lately. i dont trust my intuition. i feel in a funk.

hugs to everybody. i might stay off the pc for another few days to rest.
Nothin' like having your body out of whack to make you feel less tuned in. Take care of yourself, recharge as much as you can, and it'll come back to you eventually. :


Welcome to the newcomers!

Maia- how soon is your granny lady coming?

Clay- still cookin' the babe? I sure hope he changes his mind about challenging his exit! Safe, smooth, and healthy birthing :

Relaxing/recharging- I like to read, take a bath, knit/sew/bead to chill out. And tap. I've really come to incorporate eft/tapping into my day, as needed. And I journal where necessary too.

Camp- Early summer was just nuts, wasn't it? Things have settled down for me. I'm hoping for a later summer camp, that's nice and relaxed like we discussed initially.
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#136 of 519 Old 08-10-2009, 12:04 PM
 
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I lurve Terry Pratchett! (author of Hogfather). I can't wait till the girls are a little bit older since he has a series of books that are going to rock for the "tween pagan girl" (the Tiffany Aching books, though I think Susan is a kick butt roll model too). His Discworld books are certainly a specific "style" (sort of a monty python, "educated silliness", british farce, fiction/fantasy) but they're the sort of thing I can pick up any time, enjoy, and put down feeling a little sillier about life. Actually, I always pack a Pratchett book in my hospital bag and DH always reads it to the new babe...

One thing I really enjoy is how he really pushes assumptions and expectations and flips things around. Plus I find that my personal feelings towards religion, organizations, cynicism, etc are pretty much in line with his so the quotes sort of stick with me. For a feel, check out one of the quote pages (like this)

~~~~~~~~~~~~
paper bag decoration- I don't know if I saw it somewhere or what, but as a dirt poor grad student living in a shared studio in Brooklyn I had to get really creative. No closets, no privacy, big holes in the plaster walls, no money, no "rights" to change anything in this elegant space, etc. So I got a bunch of gift bags from the dollar store and a box of thumb tacks/tape and I covered the walls with the gift bags. Instant multi-sized mobile storage, wall art, hole covering, "disposable" trash can with built in handles, clutter buster, privacy screen, shopping accessory, instant gift wrapper, off the floor food storage, etc and all for under ten dollars.

Though seriously... it does drive DH totally bonkers.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
We had a gully whumper of a storm last night... we lost power around 2pm and then the rain started coming in sideways. Literally. Trees and branches down, wires down, no power till early this morning (ugh) and non-stop lightning. It was almost a strobe effect for a solid 4-5 hours. Very much good fun and I had hopes that the funky barometric pressure combined with the Murphey's law (the joy of getting the girls to the car in the deluge, the lack of power, no shower access, etc) would move this babe along but no such luck. Lots of contractions, no progress. Ah well.

When I told DH about our second pregnancy the birthday I put on the card was a "pulled at random" date and it turned out to be her actual birthday! The date on the card I made for this babe is tomorrow (the 11th) so maybe he's just waiting to follow the family tradition and prove his mama right?

~~~~~~~~~~~
Singin: I don't "get along with" my mom. While I am always amazed at how well she coped given her history of abuse and how hard she fought to provide my brother and I with a "normal" childhood, the fact remains that she has mental health issues and at this time she just can't be part of my family picture. It's really painful, and difficult, and I really really wish it were different. But it isn't, and it's taken me years to get to a place where I can accept that I need to protect my own children/family and my own self first. So I understand some of the feelings you may have...

I'd suggest sending her a letter if you feel you really must have contact. A letter you can craft, and work on, and put down, and pick up, and keep a copy of for future reference (I don't know if this is something that would be necessary in your situation but is in mine). It's also a way to insert some emotional space... you can't be pulled into an arguement or guilted or yelled at or made to feel less or whatever it may be with a letter, but you can in a phone call. And a letter removes a lot of the potential drama as well... you can't slam down a letter (well, you can, but the writer of the letter doesn't know about it) and while you can return it unopened that's about the worst of it.

And I've found that just writing the letter is sometimes enough to remind me of why the sitution exists as it does and what would have to change in order for the situation to become healthier. So just the writing sometimes clears my mind/emotions making the "sending" of the letter unnecessary.

Hang in there... actually, as Pratchett points out, "Happy Families" is one of those games that very very few people can actually play. There are a lot of people in this thread who can sympathize with your situation.

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#137 of 519 Old 08-10-2009, 01:08 PM
 
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Mary - your reflections about your experience are incredibly moving! I really love your reflections about birth and the healing.

Clay - that is part of why I don't want to do the phone call thing. I don't want to feel guilted into something or yelling or anything else. I firmly believe that all the stress I was under is what caused DDs pre-term birth. Of course, that isn't the reason why we left and she does not have our home address/number. However, I am starting to wonder what is going on with my youngest sister. I tried her cell phone and it isn't even ringing. I've left a voicemail and text message and I keep trying. Hopefully I'll have an answer soon. I like the letter idea and I have to write one to my grandmother too. I've wrote one to my dad a few years ago...but since he moved and I don't know where he lives anymore, I can't send it, but just writing that letter brought me some peace and allowed more healing to happen. I know my family isn't happy because I invited only my youngest sister to our wedding, but my mom doesn't like DH anyways and doesn't support our relationship so why would I invite her. haha. Maybe some general writing would help too so I can get my own thoughts in order. The sad part is, as much as I try, I really honestly do not have good memories about my family...I do however have great memories of friends and other adults I trusted.

One memory that I seem to hang on to was when I was young (elementary school aged) and living with my parents. Once the fighting stopped, I was in my bed and the moonlight from a Full Moon just poured over me in the silence. That was the most peace I had ever felt there.

DD has gone down for a nap...time for some good reading, cleaning...and I think cleansing. Oh I had to add that yesterday, admist the cleaning, I took one of our besoms and put it by the front door. It was more on instinct but it just feels so right. I think I'm going to sweep away some negative energy and perhaps get some of this negativity with my family out too.

I also wanted just to say thank you to everyone. I think I have grown spiritually since I started reading and participating in this thread/community. I had spent a few years studying with a coven but I don't feel like it really meshed with me. I actually ran into a friend and he is now the summoner for the coven and his wife is the maiden. I'm happy for them, as long as it works for them. I am happy here, doing my own thing, living life full of spirit and learning as I go along. So thank you all for sharing your thoughts, ideas, practices, etc

Nicole: mama to DD and DS, childbirth educator and doula. Dancing the spiral dance of life bellycast.gif

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#138 of 519 Old 08-10-2009, 07:04 PM
 
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#139 of 519 Old 08-10-2009, 07:12 PM
 
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#140 of 519 Old 08-10-2009, 08:08 PM
 
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#141 of 519 Old 08-10-2009, 08:21 PM
 
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Epona-lol well at least it is a pretty color

Mary- I felt very connected when I was way down under ground.

Oh my, if you drive 15 minutes from my house towards lake erie you will end up in silver creek, which is now more than a creek, it is a complete lake. many have lost homes, businesses and other things- thankfully little injury but there was one death. say a prayer for the families if you would

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#142 of 519 Old 08-10-2009, 08:27 PM
 
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#143 of 519 Old 08-10-2009, 10:42 PM
 
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Has anyone been watching the mini series Merlin? I'm really enjoying it. I actually found myself feeling disappointed that it wasn't on tonight.

Can't help it. I love magical shows.

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#144 of 519 Old 08-11-2009, 12:23 AM
 
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Thanks for the well wishes! Sorry I haven't updated....things have been busy!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Maiasaura View Post
Yay! : tell all! what's it like? I can't believe we're going to be in this house TWO YEARS this October! How time flies.
It's a 3 bed, 1 bath, built in 1947. Hardwood floors throughout the entire house. Five (!!) closets! Great, open, bright kitchen with an island. French doors from living to dining/kitchen & another set to the backyard. Faux fireplace with built-in bookshelfs on either side. Property is two lots, so the yard is massive! There are three wisteria bushes (my very fave!) as well as a mimosa tree and some big, beautiful oaks. There's def. enough room for a garden and compost. Also has a one car garage which is such a great bonus. It's on a quiet street in a really good neighborhood and is about two blocks from my daughter's daycare. It's zoned to a great elementary school and is convenient to everything in town...grocery, hospital, my work. It's a dream!

As for updated house news, the inspection was today and went amazingly well. The inspector even said he was surprised that a house of its age was in such good condition. There is one thing I'm going to ask the sellers to do, but other than that, it looks like this house is a go!! Whoohoo! :

Sweet girl has just woken....more later!

Mama to an angel boy and a pixie girl
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#145 of 519 Old 08-11-2009, 12:39 AM
 
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Morning Mamas!

We had a FANTASTIC adventure yesterday.

The heat has finally gotten me. Nearly 100 degrees for Sunday/Monday/Tuesday this week. That's the first time it's gotten anywhere near that hot this whole summer. So we were looking for something to do that was COOL. DH's solution: one of several local cave/cavern tourist spots.

So we went to Luray Caverns in Virginia (not too far from home) and enjoyed being underground for a while.

Here's something I wrote in my personal blog/journal this morning:

.

Words cannot fully capture how deeply spiritual this was for me. To be WITHIN the earth and then to consciously choose to be reborn. Awe-inspiring.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
As for being 'in tune' I need to tell you about my maternal grandmother, Gertie. She was a dear soul and my only trusted-adult as a child. She was also quite 'sensitive.' She never thought of herself as psychic, nor would allow anyone else to. But she was very in-tune with everyone around her...always knew when women would be getting pg, or when the baby would be born, always knew the baby's gender, frequently knew when and how people were going to die.

It was extraordinary...but just part of her normal life. When I would ask her about it (when I was a teenager and could start to realize how unusual this was) she would tell me that she was given messages 'from the holy spirit' and that her job was just to receive the messages, sometimes share them, other times just prepare herself and others for what was to come. She was a deeply-religious-conservative woman. And I respected her for that...she lived what she spoke and was never a hypocrite about any of it.

She passed away one month before my eldest child was conceived -- and I think the timing is important. I do not believe that she is the spirit of my eldest...but I do think she was watching over me and helped to end our 18 months of infertility in some way.

So, the deeper connected I get to the Great Spirit/Goddess/Mother Earth the more I start to understand what Gertie was saying. I do not think I have some incredibly unusual ability. I am not a medium, nor a psychic. But I can be open to the messages and impressions that the Spirit wishes me to have/understand.

I don't think this is unique. I do believe, quite fervently, that every individual will receive messages of guidance and love and 'rightness' and some sort of future foretelling if they are connected to whatever Spirit resonates within them.

Part of my learning-curve lately is about respecting the limits of these messages/impressions especially with regards to mis-interpreting. I need to just let them flow through me without trying to make them logical or understandable. The impressions will unfold in degrees when I allow them to BE.

I've also been given very clear messages about not feeling the need to 'fix' other people (like DH) but rather letting them go on their path as they need to. This is a hard one for me, when I see DH stressing I want to send out vibrations to fix his situation.

I have to repeat the following mantra inside my head/heart: "All is as it should be."

I think I'll make it a habit to keep connected all month long in little ways, but to go outside and talk with the Full Moon each month for recharge/reconnection.

For daily rituals, I try to sing this to myself every morning...as soon as my eyes open:



And then when I am in bed and settling in to sleep:



Very simple. But very effective for me.
Mary, you are one very rad lady! Thank you for sharing this.

Mama to an angel boy and a pixie girl
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#146 of 519 Old 08-11-2009, 12:52 AM
 
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Hey all- I'm back! We had a great time on our camping trip, it was so relaxing. I swam in the lake for hours every day.

That sounds wonderful!


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Originally Posted by singin_angel View Post
Here, we saw an amazing lightning show. It was just incredible. We turned off lights and other electronics and lit candles and watched the storm. After DD went to sleep, DH and I played scrabble by candlelight, it was a good time
I bet that was fantastic!!


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So the next day, with the help of DHs family, we packed up everything we had, moved to where we are, and haven't told anyone. It has been the most peaceful things we could have ever done.

She wants me to call...I don't want to. I'm so over the desire to see her proud of me someday. I was never good enough. Even when I was in labour, she came to the hospital and told DHs family that I was so independent, she could just strangle me...lovely

Anyways, I have a work meeting at 10, so I better shower. I welcome any thoughts
Nicole, it sounds like you are taking care of yourself and I believe that is the most important thing. Do what you feel serves you and DH and DD best. I think people are so used to dysfunction in our world that they don't know any better anymore...it's sad, but true.


Quote:
Originally Posted by wombatclay View Post
When I told DH about our second pregnancy the birthday I put on the card was a "pulled at random" date and it turned out to be her actual birthday! The date on the card I made for this babe is tomorrow (the 11th) so maybe he's just waiting to follow the family tradition and prove his mama right?
Here's hoping tomorrow is the day!

Since I'm all caught up on this thread, I'm finally off to bed! Have a lovely rest of the evening, ladies!

Mama to an angel boy and a pixie girl
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#147 of 519 Old 08-11-2009, 02:50 AM
 
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#148 of 519 Old 08-11-2009, 03:21 AM
 
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I've really been hoping/trying to get more in tune with the world around me. For a few periods in the past, I have been absolutely shocked at how connected I have felt - in particular to people close to me and my environment. Unfortunately, the last time was nearly 10 years ago. I think it actually got so intense then that I kinda freaked and turned my back on the connections I had. It has really only been since the birth of my son 19 months ago that I have really had the desire to acknowledge a spiritual side again. I used to be extremely intuitive and I think that was what really freaked. I believe that I am now in a better place to accept that I don't need to understand something for it to be true - but I still get frightened when I have glimpses again. I also started getting the reputation of a bit of a psychic among some of my friends that was getting to draining. I know I can't serve that role. I wish I had more quiet time to meditate - but with a toddler running around and another in November, I don't really see "more time" being realistic. Perhaps, I just need to find more creative ways to use my time.

Well - that is my ramble. I really find all of you ladies inspiring as you work your way through your own lives - struggles and successes.

Congrats

Liza - Bird watching, tree hugging, dirt eating, kinda-crunchy momma to my cub (3) and bird (1). treehugger.gifcold.gifdust.gifflower.gif
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#149 of 519 Old 08-11-2009, 07:35 AM
 
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I also got a message from my mom on my cell/work phone wanting to talk about my youngest sister. Now here is the background story - she was always pretty emotionally abusive growing up, and yep got spanked...a lot. She hated when I reached out for help. My dad was also abusive but left when I was 12. Fast forward to when we were expecting DD...we were trying to find a nice house but nothing was what we wanted. She had a house she bought for my (middle) sister to live in while in college, and she said we could stay there and just pay utilities etc. Good deal? Well my sister was supposed to stay the summer to finish work, then move home...she never did. She also never cleaned anything...fruit flies everywhere, it was disgusting. DHs family came over after DD was born after Christmas and we were up playing board games one night. My sister was leaving the door open and just letting whoever come over! My mom didn't want anything to do with it, even though she had told us other things. My sister was also stealing money for whatever she wanted out of the house account. So the next day, with the help of DHs family, we packed up everything we had, moved to where we are, and haven't told anyone. It has been the most peaceful things we could have ever done.

She wants me to call...I don't want to. I'm so over the desire to see her proud of me someday. I was never good enough. Even when I was in labour, she came to the hospital and told DHs family that I was so independent, she could just strangle me...lovely

Anyways, I have a work meeting at 10, so I better shower. I welcome any thoughts
I agree with WombatClay. I also have issues with my parents. I wrote a letter to my Father. I felt it was the only way to say what I wanted/needed to without it turning in to a yell fest. He couldn't protest, just had to read/hear me. I felt better getting everything off my chest.

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#150 of 519 Old 08-11-2009, 07:41 AM
 
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Morning mamas. Well, one group of company is leaving but got a call last night and another is on their way and will be here today. This has been such a busy month for me. I am hoping I will soon be able to get back to drinking my coffee on the porch. Plus Hubby put the for sale sign up. How am I ever going to keep the house ready to be looked at with 12 people here?

Well, I hear a thunder storm moving in. I think I will sit and relax before the house gets up. I hope everyone enjoys their day.

Thinking about you today Clay.

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