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#1 of 56 Old 10-04-2011, 08:25 AM - Thread Starter
 
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I don't really fit in anywhere.  Not that I mind, but it gets a little lonely here!  I'm not atheist.  I'm not Christian but I celebrate Christmas and teach my daughters the spiritual side of it as well.  I love debating and listening to debates between Christians and those between Jews (or anybody else, really).  The closest I get to practicing spirituality is the physical practice of yoga.  I find peace in chanting "Om".  Shinto clapping rituals resonate deeply in my chest.  Aikido was a revelation that brought me back to earth to seek the wisdom within my body rather than solely in my mind.  Buddhist meditation really strikes a chord for me.  "Cutting Through Spiritual Materialism" was a revelation.  I'm not Pagan but I really groove on ancient spirituality, recently Medusa.  Realizing that "ancient Greek myths" are really relatively modern, placing the ancient deity in the role of a monster instead of representing the changing earth and the Great Mystery.  

 

I miss the caffeine-and-second-hand-smoke-fueled coffeehouse debates.  

 

Do you lurk on these two forums, but don't really belong anywhere?  


"Let me see you stripped down to the bone. Let me hear you speaking just for me."
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#2 of 56 Old 10-05-2011, 11:25 AM
 
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That is so me. I will join you. smile.gif

 

I considered myself a hardcore atheist for many years, but now I am questioning myself. It's not so much that I believe there might be a god, but more like a collective conscious that connects us all. If I had to label myself right now, I'd call myself a Buddhist, but I'm not into the ritual part of it, just the philosophy. We do celebrate Christmas, and I put up a little nativity that I've had since I was just a few years old.

 

I haven't decided what to teach my children. I was raised in an extremely strict Christian household, and I want my children to have more freedom with their beliefs than I had.


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#3 of 56 Old 10-05-2011, 10:10 PM - Thread Starter
 
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That is so me. I will join you. smile.gif

 

It's not so much that I believe there might be a god, but more like a collective conscious that connects us all. 

 


  Just before my husband was born his dad was a minister in the Nazarene church.  While his family left the ministry his (sizable) extended family has ministers and evangelists on all sides.  Calling a collective consciousness "God" really rankles him. Me?  Whatever word gets the job done.  Whatever someone else feels comfortable saying.  It is semantically impossible to coin a word that sums up what you mean in this instance.  (Maybe a weird little symbol like Prince or Dr. Seuss would be better!)  Sometimes I do prefer "Great Spirit" but even that brings up preconceived notions.  I don't believe in a god that meddles in human affairs....though what do I know?  My experience has been that all existence is connected like cells in a greater body.....and that body is conscious.

 

I am pleased to see that someone answered my post!  

 

I've been busy thinking very strange thoughts that only someone who desperately needs to get out more often begins to think just for amusement's sake.  Recently it's been my (pretty dumb) joke with my dad that Vishnu--whose eyes, opening and closing, begat and destroyed universes--was a Buddhist.  "First there is a mountain then there is no mountain then there is." (Thank you, Donovan!)  

 

As for my kids, I just hope they don't get too confused (and I'll avoid telling them that joke, for one).  I just read stories.  Greek myths, folk tales, the Nativity.  I try to speak from my heart and tell them if I don't know the answer, because in the end I don't.

 

 

 


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#4 of 56 Old 10-06-2011, 07:47 PM
 
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In response to the title of your post, which really caught your eye:  Our old neighbour before moving to our now very rural locale, wanted a coffee house for wandering souls rather literally.  A bunch of us ladies in the local community had a grass roots book club we had put together, and we were discussing needing a place for spiritual debate as non-Catholics in a very Irish Catholic community.  Some of us were off the wagon Anglicans, there was also an Atheist who just really loved discussing and yoga enthusiasts.  Anyway, she decided to put on a Sunday morning community coffee talk for people to have a semi organized spiritual chat.  It ended up being a sporadic kind of thing, but she now owns a coffee shop since we moved, and I think I've got to ask her if she ended up doing more with this idea now that she owns the perfect venue!

 

About the question: I don't really feel like a wandering soul as much anymore, though I once did.  I've become comfortable with some ambiguity (some would call this hypocrisy) and have settled into being Christian, an Anglican, but also a strong believer in science and reason and therefore I have a metaphorical interpretation of the Bible.  I just can't swallow it as literal truth, yet my faith feels true to me, and at this point I can live with that and be honest with my community about that.  And I would never agree to allowing my faith to be something divisive between myself and others, and feel pretty sure everyone can find their way just fine with some honest help rather than interference.  So, not wandering, but maybe also not cut and dry or "typically" Christian.  Oh, and I practice yoga, at times really seriously, also a little less common for Christians.  Rather than a wanderer, I'm a firmly rooted eccentric!


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#5 of 56 Old 10-15-2011, 09:00 AM - Thread Starter
 
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So, what is your version of meditation?

 

Recently I've been lucky to get time for my "lonely walk".  It took me years to convince my husband that I needed this walk without taking one of the girls with me.  It is my only time to myself except when I stay up late at night, or the day or two per week that I work.

 

Because we live in a rural area, my walks are pretty much the same every time.  I think about whatever, but it quickly lulls me into thinking about all the spiritual claptrap.  First it's just noticing my body, like walking yoga.  Then I walk past the cemetery.  Sometimes I hate that I have to walk by a cemetery because of the morbid thoughts sometimes get stirred up.  This time I start thinking about how you ground yourself without a body (I have no idea what this means, but somehow it made sense at the time).  Suddenly a car pulls up and a lady is asking me if I've seen her golden retriever. ("Sorry.")  

 

Completely snapped me out of it.  (Very Zen!)  Of course, the second I start to analyze it the moment is gone!  The relief remained, however.


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#6 of 56 Old 10-23-2011, 08:00 PM
 
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Hey! I'll join you. Spirituality is a big part of my daily life, but I'm not religious.  I'm a wanderer and find truths in many different practices -- I find that when I am too rooted in one, then it tends to feel too narrow and fundamental to me, so I move on, always trying my best to stay centered in a place of love, compassion, and with a firm connection to God, or source, or universe, or light, whatever label we give it.  

 

I've practiced Vipassana meditation for a few years, and I find this practice very grounding and calming, but I also feel that it lacks a connection to a more universal -- God -- energy, a void which I fulfill with other sorts of meditative practices like chakra work or energy healing.  

 

Sweetsilver -- that walking meditation sounds divine.  I find it difficult to get out of the house much without the baby, and your description of it sounds so refreshing that I think I will see if I can get out tomorrow morning before DD wakes.  

 

 


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#7 of 56 Old 10-24-2011, 09:53 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Hey! I'll join you. Spirituality is a big part of my daily life, but I'm not religious.  I'm a wanderer and find truths in many different practices -- I find that when I am too rooted in one, then it tends to feel too narrow and fundamental to me, so I move on, always trying my best to stay centered in a place of love, compassion, and with a firm connection to God, or source, or universe, or light, whatever label we give it.  

 


This is why I've never found a "home" for my spirituality.  I even tried our "local" Unitarian Church, but the openness they embraced was given a name-- Unitarian Universalism-- and I just couldn't accept that.  It felt like it was contained within a box and I just couldn't get past it.  That's not a judgment on the church.  Perhaps it was my own closed-mindedness.  Perhaps it was that I was seeking a way to share the ecstatic and joyful and trying spiritualism that lives in my heart.

 

The walks have evolved over these last few years.  The best advice I received was given years ago by a mom-and-baby yoga instructor as we practiced Savasana (when I had time with only one baby on my hands).  She said that this meditation would be different than we were used to.  More a state of alert attentiveness than a deep relaxation.  That one piece of advice has saved me from a lot of frustration as my kids vault and climb over me during our occasional yoga videos.  Just two years ago there would be tears in their eyes as I left for my walk and tears and mandatory nursing time when I returned.  Definitely did not make for a relaxing walk as I was always thinking of getting home.  Now it's easier.

 


"Let me see you stripped down to the bone. Let me hear you speaking just for me."
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#8 of 56 Old 10-24-2011, 01:19 PM
 
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Sweetsilver -- I feel the same way! I've always thought about joining the Universal Unitarian church in our area because I do long for a spiritual connection with others and I'd love to have a spiritual community for my DD, but anytime I've visited one it still feels boxed-in to me.  I also prefer groups with decentralized leadership, and/or ones where the leader is humble and not ego-centered. 

 

I like that -- alert attentiveness -- I think meditation really has helped me be a better mother (and partner to my husband) too, because I've learned how not to be reactive.  


Kelly: Mama to a spunky, joy-filled DD kid.gif(10/04/10), and a loving wife to a music-making DH broc1.gif (07/14/07) We fly-by-nursing1.gifand familybed1.gif, and are just starting to TTC#2 dust.gifhh2.gif

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#9 of 56 Old 10-27-2011, 05:06 AM
 
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I think I may wander into this group as well redface.gif.  I've always been a seeker of some kind and I've dabbled in many different traditions.  Nothing fits exactly for me, but I am also longing for study and community.  I've even searched online to just find a webside with daily spiritual something????  I don't know.  Let's see...  I have some real literalists in my family on my mothers side that are usually trying to convert me and I despise their practices, but I also feel like to each their own you know (course that won't leave me mine).  When I was 21 I went to a very spiritual massage school where I was introduced to all kinds of "weird shit" as my Reiki Master would say winky.gif.  Started working in birth, which I feel is my calling and I find it very spiritual.  Went through nursing school, etc and I'm contemplating when to start my midwifery program, but I am preggo so I think I'm holding off a bit.  Became a yoga teacher-- still feel like a beginner though and I enjoy that tradition and philosophy though it's not everything for me.  I align with Buddhism probably the most, but not sure where to go with that.  I have attended a UU church which I enjoy, but there really isn't one close to me....  Anyway, help shy.gif


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#10 of 56 Old 10-27-2011, 08:03 PM - Thread Starter
 
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This is exactly why I started this thread-- because despite considering myself a very spiritual being I really no longer have a way to talk about it with others.  Years ago I read Barbara Tuchman's "A Distant Mirror".  In a passage on 14th century mercenaries, one had written about the experience of battle and how it drove him to be aware of that exact moment.  It was very spiritual in its tone and it was that moment that I had to reassess in my mind what exactly it meant to touch the divine, and the pathways from which it can be found.  It was at that moment that I began to break down my assumptions.  I have these very distinct moments where I get jarred permanently into a new paradigm.

 

This post is a little disjointed because I am collecting my thoughts and now I have to hurry up and get the girls to bed.

 

"NOW MAMA!" Alright!  

 

Anyway, goodnight....


"Let me see you stripped down to the bone. Let me hear you speaking just for me."
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#11 of 56 Old 10-28-2011, 12:39 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Originally Posted by Jessimaca View Post

 I have some real literalists in my family on my mothers side that are usually trying to convert me and I despise their practices, but I also feel like to each their own you know (course that won't leave me mine). 

 

You mean literalists, like interpreting the Bible as actual fact?

 

 Became a yoga teacher-- still feel like a beginner though and I enjoy that tradition and philosophy though it's not everything for me.  I align with Buddhism probably the most, but not sure where to go with that.  I have attended a UU church which I enjoy, but there really isn't one close to me....  Anyway, help shy.gif

 

A strange feeling, isn't it being a teacher and a beginner at the same time?

Sorry for the seeming randomness of the previous post.  It was a profound moment though, and so important in my own journey.
 

 


"Let me see you stripped down to the bone. Let me hear you speaking just for me."
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#12 of 56 Old 10-29-2011, 05:12 AM
 
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Sweet~  I didn't think your post was random, I followed I think smile.gif.  Yes, I have some bible literalistis (Jehovah's Witness to be exact) in my family.  Yes, and being a teacher and beginner at the same time is often unsettling.  But I just try to stay true to teaching what I do know and not going beyond that.  It inspires me to keep learning I guess.  But, there are also times when I feel like pulling out of teaching until I've studied 20 more years or something!  I mean, you could study yoga forever!

 

So, this is where I'm stuck.  I feel stuck anyway.  I wish I had a way to continue learning with others, growing.  Like a study group or something.  Learning and studying on my own is okay, but isn't the same as being with a group.  Sometimes I also wish there was a tradition that I bought hook, line, and sinker you know.  Like total faith in something.  But, that may be impossible for me.

 

What are you most drawn to?


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#13 of 56 Old 10-29-2011, 02:44 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Years ago, my faith was influenced by my hippie lifestyle: Eastern religions spoke to me, the easy way they addressed the journey of the spirit.  But it was the main philosophies, not the practice of the faith that interested me.  Christianity, distilled down to its essence spoke to me as well.  The general theme of all this was the denial of the body and the nourishing of the spirit.  Giving away possessions, asceticism, nonviolence.  But as you said, I didn't follow one faith, and I agree that that can feel like being adrift.  I think there is value with following the path of one faith, dedicating yourself to the rituals that bring you to the..... ?????..... source.

 

Then, after some crisis of identity, I came down the earth.  At first I felt like a sellout.  I stopped roaming, settled down, set aside the conversations that held spiritual meaning for me.  Along the way I picked up Aikido, not expecting it to bring me back to the spiritual path.  But this was different.  This path was clearer, and it grounded me.  

 

My Aikido teacher wrote a passage in his book: 

 

"You are not here to develop the spirit/ Your spirit is already developed/ Address the needs and health of the body with exercise and good nutrition/ You are an embodied soul/ If you deny the body you stifle the soul/ The lessons you need are in the physical plane"  (From "Moving Toward Harmony" by Eric Oberg)

 

This, along with that great guru of Ganja, Bob Marley:  "Some people say/ 'Great God will come from the sky/ Take away everything/ And make everybody feel high'/ But if you know what life is worth/ You will look for yours on Earth/ So now you see the light/ Stand up for your right"

 

Thank you, Bob, for helping me out!

 

I started yoga as well, and this was just like an extension of Aikido but one I practiced with my own body instead of in tandem with others.  Connecting my body to the spiritual path actually lead me to a calmer, less confusing place.  I anchored myself in my body, in the earth, and have lead a very mundane existence ever since.  Now, away from the Dojo and limited to yoga videos and walks, my main source of growth has been raising my girls.  And so this continues.  My "place" is to continue working with the mundane troubles of the world.  There is something quite profound in something so simple.  I'm sure there is a name, a "yoga", for this kind of path.  It suits me very well.  I have stopped worrying about the results....mostly.  There is still doubt and confusion sometimes.

 

My husband's mother has bazillions of friends through her church.  I still wish I had a place, a church, whatever, to talk about this to people, but in some ways I think that is a diversion, preventing me from immersing myself entirely into daily rhythms of life, forgetting myself and finding peace within that.  Even this thread could be considered a distraction.  Loneliness, boredom, confusion, all seem to me to be the Fire before the gates of the Great Mystery.

 

"Chop wood, carry water".  Our 21st century version might be "Boil water, cook spaghetti, pay the power bills".  I remember an excellent passage from Trungpa's "Cutting Through Spiritual Materialism" (about as deep into Buddhism as I ever got.)  He made the point that the Japanese Tea Ceremonies, which Westerners found so fascinating, were actually based on the dull rituals of a dull, everyday task.  The point was to bring the practitioner to the point of profound boredom, and Westerners were missing that point because the ceremony looks so exotic.  That was his take on it, anyhow.  (Maybe a spaghetti-making ritual for Americans?)

 

I find the ancient stories of myth endlessly fascinating, but I think that is a sideline.  It's fun to contemplate the cosmic meaning of Medusa or Kali, or the Hero's journey, but it is merely brain candy.  Rituals were meant to dull the mind and ground the spirit, like a trance, to be forgotten along with Ego, not to feed the Ego with Profound Ideas to share and make us look Wise and Holy.

 

Am I making sense?  

 

I found that by teaching Aikido, I was learning it more deeply than I ever could have.  So, when you begin teaching you can truly begin learning.  Let your students teach you.

 

 


"Let me see you stripped down to the bone. Let me hear you speaking just for me."
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#14 of 56 Old 10-29-2011, 09:52 PM
 
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#15 of 56 Old 11-08-2011, 03:56 AM
 
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Love the quotes by your teacher and Bob!

 

I also find comfort in focusing on my physical body through yoga.  I also used to work with horses when I was younger-- I took trail rides out all day and that also felt very spiritual.  That first ride in the morning...  being in nature and with such awesome animals.  Walking in nature still is one of times when I feel closest to spirit, the universe, my higher Self, God, whatever you wanna call it ;-). 

 

Okay, kind of off topic.  Read an awesome book the other day-- Yoga Bitch.  Loved it!  She had a kundalini rising experience during her yoga teacher training.  I had one in my massage training 10 years ago so it was really cool to read someones account of it.  I'm not good at expressing myself and I love finding people who are :-)  Anyway, this brings me to your point about community.  I think that's what I feel I'm lacking.  Community and direction.  I need it.  My experience in massage school 10 years ago was profound and it totally changed me because I was sorrounded by a community on the same path.  I swear you get so much more from that.  I think that's what I'm looking for, but how?????  I did not have that in my yoga teacher training.  Hypocrisy mostly.  Fake people.

 

I have read some buddhist books that I really enjoy.  I guess lately reading and yoga are my spiritual practice.  And I'm pregnant with my first baby, so I will be starting on that spiritual journy as well.  I'm just always looking for more direction.  Always a seeker....


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#16 of 56 Old 11-11-2011, 06:52 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Why do we seek community for our spirituality?  Is it better shared?  Is it because we are afraid?  Why do we "worship" (insert preferred word here) together?


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#17 of 56 Old 11-12-2011, 06:07 AM
 
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I'm not sure-- it seems a natural human condition.  In my massage training they talked about getting further with a group of like-minded individuals-- because you have support, understanding, etc.  But who knows?  I just feel like I stay motivated with a motivated group.


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#18 of 56 Old 11-13-2011, 06:42 AM
 
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"Rather than a wanderer, I'm a firmly rooted eccentric!" FarmerBeth I like your thinking!  

 

I was raised in a secular household, but, always myself aware of something divine - be it my inner self or something higher, one can debate.  I've read and studied so many religions.   I converted to Catholicism!  That was in a desperate attempt to "fix" my immediate family's issues and appease my catholic in-laws.  Not a good move on my part. I love the mass but not in agreement with the boys' club, the dogma or many other things.   My family has been going through our own hell in recent months and I find no support from this church or community.  

 

I have on my nightstand right now Tibetan Book of Dead, a Buddhist meditation book, a copy of Al Anon support literature, a Christian Science book by Mary B. Eddy's,  a Bible and two hoodoo spell books.  Oh yeah, and downstairs I'm reading a book on Judaism.    I practice meditation and kundalini yoga too. 

 

To be honest, I have found that Buddhist thought seems to help me detach and cope with my own personal issues right now.   I've been attending an Al Anon and a AA 12 step program in recent months to help me understand my own issues and my husband's issues. I find applying Buddhist thought to 12 step, quite a powerful tool!  

 

When my children were not yet in school, I was very lonely and tried to meet "moms" at church groups, thinking I could conform my thinking and make friends at same time.  Didn't work. I did make a lot of friends but funny enough - they seemed fairweather.  If I wasn't accepting Jesus as my saviour, then bye-bye from them.

 

I've found more community and more friends just following my own interests. Not spiritual but rather taking Nia dance classes and studying musical instrument - you find that like minded people drift into the same paths.    But I guess one realizes not everyone will be a reflection of themselves.

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#19 of 56 Old 07-29-2013, 09:26 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Welcome back to the Coffeehouse.... it looks like we are back in business for a while!

 

I felt a strong need to resurrect this old thread of mine.  I almost began a new one, but by dredging this one up, I don't need to reiterate relevant details.  And, quite honestly, I found my posts to be a good review.

 

So, what brought this up?

 

Over the last few years, I've found myself moving further and further into the pagan side of spirituality.  Still very much influenced more by metaphor and story than by actual religious practice, but I find myself coming down squarely into the ancient, feminine camp and getting more and more disgruntled with patriarchy and rigid monotheism.

 

Oddly enough, what prompted this came not from a book on theology, but from a history of swearing I am reading by Melissa Mohr entitled "Holy Sh*t".  The chapter "On Earth As t Is In Heaven" covers the symbology of the ancient Yahweh, when he was still one of many, usually more "powerful" deities worshipped in that part of the world.  His folk counterpart was Asherah, whose symbol is the Tree of Life (which grows out of her vagina).  Whether from misogyny or (more probably) from the drive for absolute monotheism in that folk religion, Asherah disappeared and the Israelites are instructed to cut down sacred poles ("asherah").  So, I'm thinking about the Tree in the Garden of Eden, and the Serpent (another symbol of the Sacred Feminine) that gets a bad rap in Genesis (the same happened for Medusa and her snakes, but not Kali and hers).

 

Harumph.  I'm surprised (am I?) that this has become something of a tirade for me, the erasing and misappropriation of the Ancient Goddess, even though I am far from a worshipper.  I still groove on mythology (the stories that religions, past and present, are based on) but I am still very much a lowly hippie-- grooving on the cosmos in all its forms.


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#20 of 56 Old 09-23-2013, 04:38 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Enjoying this article on faith in science:

 

http://www.npr.org/blogs/13.7/2013/09/23/225239775/does-science-require-faith?utm_content=socialflow&utm_campaign=nprfacebook&utm_source=npr&utm_medium=facebook

 

Yikes, that was a long url.... let me know how the link works.  I was logged onto FB at the time.

 

Be sure to check out the link to her previous blog on faith and reason.  I'm still reading through it.  I need some coffee......


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#21 of 56 Old 09-24-2013, 06:04 AM
 
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I just stumbled on this thread and found it very interesting.  I too find it difficult to fit in anywhere spiritually.  Recently, I have come back to Catholicism.  I am fascinated by the lives of saints and I just read an amazing book The Mystical Life of Jesus, which really paints him in a different light as a mystical and spiritual teacher and even has evidence in the bible.  I also have read books on Buddhism such as the Tibetan Book of the Dead and The Tibetan Art of Parenting.  I practice daily meditation and also do yoga which is strange for most Catholics.  Why does meditation have to be something different than prayer?  I guess I am fascinated and amazed by all religions and have found so many parallels.  That is really cool that you are finding symbolism throughout the traditional bible stories also.  My biggest question I have right now that I meditate on frequently is what happens after we die?  I grew up with the idea of heaven but I am now leaning on the side of reincarnation and maybe heaven is within once you are enlightened?  I just don't know, maybe it will come to me one day during meditation. 

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#22 of 56 Old 09-24-2013, 09:03 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Welcome, VE, glad you found this.  It had laid dormant for a long time before I felt the need to resurrect it.  

 

I find the rituals of Catholicism interesting.  It really is an ancient religion, if you think about it, and the symbolism is rich.  All this aside from the politics of the religion, which I won't comment on here.   I love the study of symbolism, but then am drawn towards simplicity in the end. I haven't explored it personally, in my life, just learned *about* it.  They are aids for the journey of the spirit in the same way that a familiar smell will transport you mentally back to your grandparents' house.

 

I would love to hear more about your meditations on "life after death".  The most recent thought I've had about it is the spirit "remembering" its true nature.  I'm not sure if I believe in heaven and hell beyond personal experiences-- perhaps hell is the spirit getting lost, not remembering true nature?  I have not read the Tibetan Book, but did see a PBS (?) special about it, and following a man on his death bed, with the Book being read to him in his last days.  It mentioned reincarnation, and stated that  if your spirit starts forgetting before its journey is finished, it should take the first path to a new life, so that it does not enter the new life completely lost (my words).  Interesting idea.  Not sure what to make of it.

 

I used to be terrified of death as a child.  Not so much anymore, but it makes me sad that I will not see the entirety of my girls' lives.  Need to get over that.  But I have reached a place where I would be glad to accept death of the body with my eyes wide open.  Eventually.  When I'm old enough :)


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#23 of 56 Old 09-30-2013, 08:36 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Cosmic!

 

OK, one last link that touches on science and faith right at the bottom of the article.  Great article in its own right:

 

http://www.npr.org/blogs/13.7/2013/09/29/225359504/how-does-the-world-work-top-down-or-bottom-up?utm_content=socialflow&utm_campaign=nprfacebook&utm_source=npr&utm_medium=facebook

 

If anyone has a problem with the link, let me know.


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#24 of 56 Old 10-02-2013, 04:45 AM
 
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Subbing!  This is where I'm at.  I feel there can be a connection to a bigger sense of life, but I have a hard time accepting that there is one religion that has the inside scoop on who God is.  (Or the life force, or higher power, or whatever you call it.)  I grew up in the woods, before kindergarten, and I was aware of a kind of humming of life that connected everything in one continuous sheet of existence.  All the plants and trees and bugs had a kind of quiet humming.  Not the kind of humming I could hear with my ears, but I heard it through my skin.  It all hummed right through me and through the trees, connecting everything.  If anything moved in the woods, I was aware of it, because we were all connected.  This was all my own personal perception of the world, and I never told anyone, because I didn't think it was unusual.  So no one ever told me it was wrong of me to experience the world this way.  (I was slightly autistic, so my sensory system was in overdrive. It could have been synesthesia.)  Sadly, I also witnessed violence at a young age which blasted silent holes in the continuous sheet of humming which stayed there.  I hate the holes. 

 

I've recently gotten back in touch with this part of myself.  As I grew up, I forgot about the humming, or maybe blocked it out.  But now I've tried listening for it again, and it is still there, if I am paying attention.  I would like to visit the Sequoia forest someday, to hear what the trees say. 

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#25 of 56 Old 10-02-2013, 08:07 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Even if it was synesthesia, what an incredible experience!  I, too, have had moments of physically feeling connections to everything around me, but they were either fleeting or induced by psychedelics (which, like your experience, I do not discount just because it was influenced by something else.)   

 

In fact, one particular experience is the root of all my faith: that we are connected to everything all around us, and that all the connections together, the universe, has a consciousness.  

 

I'm glad you've been able to reconnect with that incredible gift.


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#26 of 56 Old 10-02-2013, 08:11 AM
 
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Subbing too! I would like to make a post later, when I have a quiet moment to actually think!

I liked your last link, SweetSilver. I copied a response that I would like to share....

Quote:
 For me, anything that helps us mirror the Universe as it really is, should be included. Why can't it be top down, bottom up, reductionism, non-linear dynamics, genetics, epigenetics, and culture all at the same time... the only thing that keeps us from utilizing all valid models is the inability of our awareness to accept paradox or to realize that any one conception of reality is no more than one view of the elephant (blind men and the elephant). That is simply the nature of human awareness. It always sees partially but those partial views don't have to be mutually exclusive. Reality is a whole and always has a coherence and unity even if our awareness is fragmented.

Back later! Thanks for starting this thread :)

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#27 of 56 Old 11-01-2013, 06:02 AM
 
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I just stumbled on this thread.  Thank you for starting it.

 

I was raised Catholic and then gradually grew away from the church.  I've always felt I didn't need a physical structure to experience the Divine.  That everything is a part of one giant web.  It was difficult to break away from the rituals of the church, and I still feel something stirring when I smell a particular incense or when I hear the Rosary.  I realized after awhile that I can create my own practice.  Spirituality is such a personal thing.  I cringe when others try to pin other people down with their beliefs.  Even when it's me doing it! 

 

I've never understood why science and spirituality can't be interconnected as I believe they're simply different ways of expressing the world around us.  They don't have to be separate.

 

I love to walk our property and just experience the land..the plants, rocks, dirt, spiders, birds, deer...whatever critters are out there.  I can kinda identify with feeling the "hum" of it all.  Yet it's such a tough thing to describe in words.  I take photos of Nature to capture those moments where it seems like something is reaching out to me...or just because I am dumbstruck by the Beauty of it all.  I call it Zen photography.  Thank goodness for digital cameras!  I once used up rolls of film.  :-) 

 

I've experienced things that lead me to believe there is "something" out there.  I don't want to label it.  I've been helped at just the right time...I've seen "what goes around, comes around" in action and been awed by it.  I've wondered about reincarnation after an interesting experience during an acupuncture session.  Oh and I believe Catholicism once embraced reincarnation but I think it was removed from literature.  I think there's even a saint. 

 

Any way, I'm rambling! 

 

Take care everyone.  May you all have some Peace in your lives today and always.

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#28 of 56 Old 11-01-2013, 08:36 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Ramble away, milagras, that's what we are here for.


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#29 of 56 Old 11-07-2013, 12:01 PM
 
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I think I belong in here. I don't know - I'm getting pretty used to just not fitting in anywhere :p

 

I haven't been a super active poster on here in the last little while. But I come back and lurk and read in the homeschooling/unschooling forums and always pop in and read a few threads in this forum. 

This thread in particuar is interesting to me. 

I used to spend a lot of time thinking about my spiritual beliefs, trying to put them into sensible thoughts and words and feelings. And then life gets busy, and I forget. And now I'm making a concerted effort to NOT push any spirituality onto my children, I'd like them to just come to their own beliefs when they feel it. However, that means I keep my spirituality "in the closet" so to speak. 

 

Lately, with the Canadian remembrance day creeping up on us (Nov 11th), my mind is full of my pacifist beliefs and then I remember "oh yeah, I used to try to look for some Quaker meetinghouses near me, and there weren't any, I wonder if there are some now?" and then I think that I would love to introduce that belief system to my kids and then I feel conflicted and then I remember I live in backasswards Northern Ontario where there are just no places for me to go to gather with people who believe similarly. Then I forget again and life gets busy. 

 

Some days I feel this tremendous need to fill my spiritual cup, other days I think "is it really this big of a deal"? 

I really wish I lived around others like me. 

 

Whoa, rambly. I thought my thoughts were clearer than this lol. 


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#30 of 56 Old 11-09-2013, 12:56 PM
 
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When it comes down to it, on those days when I really want to put myself in some kind of spiritual category - and I fail miserably - I just remember that I'm a good person (most of the time). :-)  It bugs me when others tout the idea that one must belong to a certain church or practice to be good.  So many spiritual paths come down to one simple thing.  do unto others.  Harm none. 

 

Yet part of me still longs to fit in sometimes.  My childhood church always had dinners and bazaars and trips to places like Washington DC.  It is the community I miss.


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