visiting an LDS friend - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 8 Old 11-25-2002, 10:58 AM - Thread Starter
 
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in may of next year i'll be visiting and an old and very dear friend. her husband and her are very hard core with the mormons. does this mean that i don't or cant drink my morning java? please enlighten me. i've heard that it would be disrepectful to drink anything with caffeine in her house. I should say that i knew her befor she became a mormon. i would appreciate any advice.
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#2 of 8 Old 11-25-2002, 11:08 AM
 
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As a former Mormon AND a serious Java junkie I wanted to respond to your post. First of all, I know you and your friend are happy to see each other again. One of my dearest friends is LDS and we go on vacation together. Since her kids remember when I taught Sunday School for them, I don't drink coffee in front of the kids. I would drink coffee in front of her, but not make a big deal of it.

I would ask her how she feels about it. My friend often let me slip out for a bit so I could drink some java in peace (I have three kids and she has four. We do almost anything to give each other a little peace at thap point, kwim?)

I would definitely not drink alcohol at her house, just like I wouldn't bring a T-bone steak over to a veg household. Just enjoy being with your friend!

Miranda
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#3 of 8 Old 11-25-2002, 11:12 AM - Thread Starter
 
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yes, i agree, but i'll enjoy our time together more if i can have that morning java. i don't drink at all and her and i used to be big drinkiers together. by the way , why can't mormons drink coffee. i know it has to do with caffeine. but why?
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#4 of 8 Old 11-25-2002, 11:34 AM
 
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I would talk to her about it. My LDS friend feels that since we are not members that it's not a big deal if I consume coffee or caffinated soda in front of her. But every person is different, and consumption isn't the same as preparing it in her home.

BTW, if I remember correctly they don't do alcohol, caffine (in all forms including soda) because they are drugs.
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#5 of 8 Old 11-25-2002, 12:09 PM
 
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I am LDS. My parents-in-law drink tea, coffee and other things that we choose not to drink. Right now my kids are small, but this year I'm sure dd is going to ask specific questions when we see them this week.

In the past we've just explained that X is grandma's drink and not for sharing.

Right now we have started explaining about different people making different choices. If you are traveling together, then take your tea/coffee, etc. yourself. Don't expect an LDS person to serve that, just ask if you can boil water. Also, talk with your friend to find out what she's comfortable with.
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#6 of 8 Old 11-26-2002, 07:18 PM
 
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I'm LDS. Your question is a good one and it is sweet that you don't want to offend your friend! I am not sure how I feel! I for sure wouldn't serve coffee or tea, but I don't think that I would be offended if an old friend came to visit and made their own. Hmmm. I did like the post about not taking along a big steak to a veggie household. I am not very helpful!: I don't think it is that big of a deal. Ask your friend! I am sure that she will be honest. She will probably be so happy to see you that she won't care!
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#7 of 8 Old 11-27-2002, 12:27 AM
 
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Well I'm LDS and it wouldn't bother me any. If you offered it I'd just say no thank you I don't drink coffee. No biggie in my opinion but everyones different!
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#8 of 8 Old 11-27-2002, 12:49 AM
 
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I do not expect my non-LDS friends to try and behave as if they were LDS in my precense. That said, we do have a rule that will always stand that we do not allow alcohol in the house (or cigarettes, etc). But coffee is not equal to alchol. Hmm...this is a tough choice. (and I actually LOVE the smell of coffee...) My son already knows that we do not drink coffee or smoke (we have neighbors whom we see all the time who do) but that some people do not believe the same things that we do and choose to take such things into their bodies. I would not have a problem with a friend coming over with a to-go cup of coffee in hand. I don't know how I would feel about a friend preparing her coffee in my kitchen, though.
Like has already been suggested, I'm sure she would be open to you asking her about her preferences! Have a great trip!

Oh, and in the word of wisdom it says we should not take strong drinks into our body, meaning green or black tea and coffee because it is not good for our bodies. There is no hard fast rule about caffinated soda. It's personal interpretation and revelation at that point.

Heidi : Married for 15 years, expecting our 8th baby in July!

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