LDS mamas -- a question or two from a newbie to the church... - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 5 Old 12-06-2002, 10:53 PM - Thread Starter
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Hi LDS mammas,

I recently have had a personal revelation/realization that the lds church is my right path. It makes me happy, but also seems odd to me, and I'm scared to talk to my hubby about it. So I have a few questions:

First, are there any good lds boards out there? Are there also any boards for new-ish converts?

Second, I am troubled about my husband. When we got married, I was a fence-sitter btwn a secular humanist and a pagan. (Although I secretly sometimes went to the Episcopal church bcs. it felt almost-right, too). DH is anti-religion, having been raised in a real scary hellfire-and-brimstone church that told him at age 6 or so that he was going to hell! So I do understand his feeling that religion in and of itself is harmful.

I have mostly been told that it's ok for me to convert and not put pressure on him to do the same. But recently, on an lds chat, I was told that I should be discouraged from joining for the sake of family unity. I find it odd that a church that has, so far, shown me love, compassion, and welcome, would say that I should let dh's disagreement over religion hold me back spiritually. We've never had the same beliefs, and I don't expect he'll tell me NOT to join (he's smarter than that.) However, I do expect him to kind of freak out, and also to stand by an insistence to never bring dd, who wants to go.

I guess that's really two issues there, but I'd love some input. Thanks.


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#2 of 5 Old 12-06-2002, 11:58 PM
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Originally posted by CorasMama
When we got married, I was a fence-sitter btwn a secular humanist and a pagan. (Although I secretly sometimes went to the Episcopal church bcs. it felt almost-right, too).
I'm responding to this because I recognize some of myself in this statement. I'm Episcopalian, but my husband is not particularly religious, although he leans towards paganism which is something that interests me; and I often feel like I come across more as a secular humanist in the past few years. Yet a couple years ago, I actually was considering the LDS church. I attended the church a few times, and had discussions and a Bible study/prayer with my neighbor and two of the elders. I mentioned the fact that my husband had no interest in converting and they didn't seem to think that would be a problem. I almost think the idea was that if I joined and became strong in my faith, perhaps my husband would have a change of heart. As it turned out, I couldn't embrace it fully, and my thoughts of conversion fell by the wayside. I tried to have a talk with my husband about it, and he was a little concerned because his first wife was a non-practicing Jew who became a born again Christian, and she left him, so a sudden conversion on my part would have worried him. But frankly, that was in the works for a long time from the sound of it, so I don't think it was an issue. Whenever the subject of the LDS church came up, he told me to let him know when it was time for him to go out and get more wives. :

Best wishes to you on this new path in your life! Hopefully some of the LDS mamas here can help you out with the message board question.
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#3 of 5 Old 12-07-2002, 01:47 AM
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Hi- Have you been to or ?

If you joining would cause serious discord (as in your dh completely opposed resulting in divorce etc.) in your home and marriage it would be discouraged. Have you talked to a local bishop? I know of a board on babycenter and there is also an ap lds moms board but I can't remember the url.

There is a thread further down called lds mamas #7 where you could post and maybe get a response quicker.

Best wishes! Let us know how everything goes!!

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#4 of 5 Old 12-07-2002, 02:04 AM
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I have a hard time imagining a situation where religious differences with a spouse would keep you from joining, at least from a church standpoint. It would have to be extremely extreme--like probability of divorce that Sarah mentioned. Even then, if you really felt it was right.... I think this is something where you just have to follow your heart--no one else can tell you what to do, feel, or believe.

The LDS ap mom's group is

There's also a group

There's an LDS parents board at parents place.

I don't know of any others, or any specifically for new converts, but I would search yahoogroups--I'm sure there is something.
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#5 of 5 Old 12-07-2002, 04:14 PM
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There used to be a nice board on Lots of religious folk who just didn't fit in their home churches but needed their religion fix.

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