I am all things. Some might call me a Unitarian. Yet I haven't found a home there either.
I've been searching, looking for Christ, trying to commit, to say I am this one thing.
Yet I'm attracted - instinctually -- to Buddhism.
I love the Course in Miracles.
I feel warmth toward paganism.
The thing is, I'm beginning to feel that this is okay.
I remember once years ago, I had this big stack of books on the table around me at the library. They were all different faith books. Critical studes as well as personal revelations. I sat there for hours looking through them and then finally, after a point of reaching pure absurdity, I laughed out loud! I was actually thinking that in one of these books I was going to find THE answer -- to life!!!!!!
Forget all of the history of theologians arguing until they're blue in the face! Iwould discover the TRUTH for all people!
And for so long, even still, I have felt that accepting all things as truth was like accepting nothing as truth. And especially if I didn't
accept Christ as truth I was denying the love I feel and have felt for him.
Now I think I am becomig comfortable with the idea that my belief does not have to fit in a box. It is as individual as I am. I am not denying Christ if I also accept other truths as truth.
For so long I felt that I needed a church to accept me, to fit my ideas into. Sometimes I still think this would be nice. But now I know that it is not necessary. I do not like sitting in a pew being lectured at for an hour. (I know not all churches do this.)
And I guess...finally...at long last...I'm okay with that.