well, it's time for me to talk about my "secret" success, even though the process is not yet complete.
this is one of those 'secret successes' that is not physical manifestation, but the manifestation of an emotional/spiritual aspect. i'm kinda psyched about it.
months ago, i decided to take responsibility for a certain behavior pattern. in this process, i became very conscious and conscientious about certain actions and reactions, certain behavior patterns. i was very diligent in my process, as well as looking for opportunities from the cosmos to help and enlighten me in the process.
one of the lessons i learned is that i don't have to take responsibility for other people's reactions. in the past, i tended to do this, and then would end up in a resentment pattern for the way that they treated me. so, my big lesson over the last couple of months has been about learning to set appropriate boundaries with certain types of behaviors from others.
with this, i knew that the process would recur in different ways but with decreasing levels of severity until i "got it." the first experience lasted a year, the second lasted 4 months, the third lasted 6 weeks, and this most recent one lasted--
*drum roll please*
a single conversation.
now, i consider that, a success.
it looks like i'm starting to 'get it.' i'd hoped to 'get it' a bit sooner, but honestly the last two were 'tests' after some of the things that i'd gotten. I've really gotten over the resentment part and recreating that, but i also now understand why others are behaving this way in response to me. i can recognize 'my part' and i can recognize 'their part' and i don't have to take responsibility for the whole.
now, the next step is to figure out how to tell people thati'm not responsible for their stuff in a graceful way.