LDS Mamas and Papas #39 - Page 9 - Mothering Forums

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Old 03-13-2007, 02:03 PM
 
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The issue is that the garment is supposed to fall to your knee, and they need to be covered up. They might ride up a little when you sit, but when I look at my garments, for me to wear them properly, the hem should be falling a bit below where my knee begins.
This was my understanding as well. I looked it up in For the Strength of Youth and True to the Faith, and they just say "short shorts", which is interesting. I always thought that the youth were taught "knee length", but I guess not. They are told to keep in mind that someday they may want to wear garments, but if no one's ever explained exactly where the garment should go, they wouldn't know that. Interesting.

I think it's funny how we justify things. If a member wants to wear shorter shorts, she'll justify that her knee begins 2" above her kneecap. But if that spot gets hurt, she'd tell the doctor "my thigh hurts", not "my knee", lol. I am fully aware that I justify other things, so I try not to get too uptight about what other people do or don't do about modesty

I also try to remember that at the temple they don't get out an anatomy model and show exactly where the garment goes. Some people may have a different understanding than me. Or, they may have been taught differently by the temple matron or workers. For example, the temple matron usually gives new endowees instructions on whether or not they can wear underwear under or over the garment during their period, and a lot of times those instructions conflict with what other temple matrons say! I like discussing things like this because it's interesting to me to see what people think, but I don't dwell on it in real life or scrutinize or judge every person I come across, just so you all know, lol
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Old 03-13-2007, 06:03 PM
 
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For example, the temple matron usually gives new endowees instructions on whether or not they can wear underwear under or over the garment during their period, and a lot of times those instructions conflict with what other temple matrons say! I like discussing things like this because it's interesting to me to see what people think, but I don't dwell on it in real life or scrutinize or judge every person I come across, just so you all know, lol
You know, this exact thing was discussed by 3-4 ladies at a baby shower I attended this past weekend. They started off talking about whether or not you should wear garments while you exercise (seems like I recall a quote stating that if you CAN, you SHOULD...basketball possibly being an example used. And I always do wear my garments if I'm exercising, but most women in my ward don't). Then they started talking about the matron in the temple saying there were 2 times in a woman's life when the garments don't need to be closest to the skin: nursing, and menstruating. Although even my mom insists that the garments go under the bra for nursing (and while I didn't do that when my kids were infants and nursing, I switched to bra on the outside once I stopped leaking constantly). It definitely varies from matron to matron, and at the baby shower, everyone decided that it's ultimately between you and the Lord. Which I do agree with. Although I do tend to lean more conservatively, I suppose, with how I wear or don't wear them.

I hate buying shorts. I'm glad the style is knee-length or calf length now, but for a while there I was only having luck when buying men's shorts, which don't exactly look feminine

SAHM to Melinda (Oct '03), Jacob (Aug '05),  Alex (Apr '08), and baby.gif Malcolm (Sept 29, '11)

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Old 03-13-2007, 06:31 PM
 
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Ugh, shorts. I'm short, and capris fit me like pants. Yet I can't seem to find shorts that are long enough for me but aren't super baggy, so my garments are visible anyway. I have one pair of knee length shorts that fit snugly enough to be modest but not be skin tight, and they are wearing out. I mostly wear skirts (which I find keep me cooler in the summer, anyway) and pants made out of lightweight material in the summer. It helps that I hate shaving my legs and have spider veins on my calves... not too much incentive for me to show off my legs.

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Old 03-13-2007, 06:34 PM
 
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It's interesting to find out a lot of people have differing opinions about garments, relationship stuff and rules of the church. I mean I personally don't wear my garments while I'm exercising. I don't feel good about it. I wear them when I'm nursing with the bra on the outside and I wear them soon after having kids. I do hate the whole bleeding thing but for some reason I feel better about wearing them when I'm bleeding than when I'm sweating. I also sweat A LOT! It's seriously horrible, so that's why I don't feel comfortable wearing them.
Oh yea and when I brought up the letter of the letter of the law compared to the spirit of the law I was thinking more in poersonal circumstances. Like when someone would get judged for wearing pants but they had the experiences Valerie has had. It just proves we really don't understand everything going on in someones life. We need to love the person and hope they, the Lord and the bishop can figure some of this stuff out
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Old 03-13-2007, 07:34 PM
 
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It's interesting to find out a lot of people have differing opinions about garments, relationship stuff and rules of the church. I mean I personally don't wear my garments while I'm exercising. I don't feel good about it.
This definitely is interesting! I feel the exact opposite about exercising And both of us are basing it on being the most respectful to the garment! It really is interesting

I take a once-weekly yoga class, and a lot of the women wear tank tops. I know one is LDS, because I can see the waist of her bottoms But obviously she doesn't wear her tops. I have not felt comfortable considering a tank top, but I've been thinking about getting one, because I get some serious chafing from my garments and shirt during class. Before I go to a tank top I'll try some shea butter before class or something.

I think I mentioned earlier that I've been nursing straight for over 5 years. I never even thought about wearing my bra inside my garments. And if I did, it would be a very long term thing for me, since I've gone so long.

Where sweat is concerned, when you step outside in Houston in July or August, you are *literally* wet within minutes, regardless of how much or how little physical exertion. So I and my garments will just have to deal with sweat
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Old 03-13-2007, 07:40 PM
 
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Is everyone comfortable with the scope and depth of this conversation? This is a very public board. . . But I don't think anyone had said anything inappropriate so far. Does everyone agree?
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Old 03-13-2007, 08:09 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Is everyone comfortable with the scope and depth of this conversation? This is a very public board. . . But I don't think anyone had said anything inappropriate so far. Does everyone agree?
I don't think that anything that has been said is "out of line," so-to-speak. I think we're doing pretty good. As long as we avoid particulars, i.e. things about the garments you only learn in the temple, then I think we'll be fine. Nothing that has been said here is much different than what the First Presidency has outlined in letters to the wards and stakes about the wearing of garments in the past couple of years. So, I think we're good. FWIW.

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Old 03-13-2007, 08:48 PM
 
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I think I mentioned earlier that I've been nursing straight for over 5 years. I never even thought about wearing my bra inside my garments. And if I did, it would be a very long term thing for me, since I've gone so long.

Where sweat is concerned, when you step outside in Houston in July or August, you are *literally* wet within minutes, regardless of how much or how little physical exertion. So I and my garments will just have to deal with sweat
I wear my bra over; I put it on under a few times for chiro appointments, and I found it was a lot less comfortable right against my skin. Of course, I rarely wear a bra now, so it's not so much of an issue.

I'm up in Ontario, but in the summer inside without a/c, I'm constantly sweating and wet. Ugh. That's when my garments are the least comfortable.

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Old 03-13-2007, 09:07 PM
 
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i don't have garments yet, but i have heard several female members talk about wearing them or not during exercise. it seems mixed.

i am not a fan of shorts at all. i am short too, i wear cropped pants as jeans LOL. i have several pairs of maternity capris and i will be wearing those mostly this summer. i do have two pairs of maternity shorts and i think they both hit my knees.

are there garments for pregnancy? or do they sorta grow with you?
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Old 03-13-2007, 09:11 PM
 
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They have maternity garments. The bottoms are a must, unless you want to wear the waist below your belly. I am really short-waisted, so like Marly said, my bottoms go up to my bra! I am 17 weeks along and still easily wearing my bottoms, except now they fit closer to waist level, lol. I don't think maternity tops are necessary, especially if you wear the chemise tops (very stretchy) and if you have the maternity bottoms.

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are there garments for pregnancy? or do they sorta grow with you?
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Old 03-13-2007, 09:12 PM
 
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Wow... I have never considered wearing my bra over my g's... is that a normal thing? Of course, the thought of going without undies under my g's makes me feel creepy and naked... None of the women in my family wear their bras over thier g's either. I wonder who first thought of that?

My matron never discussed any of this either, was she supposed to? I've just sort of done what came naturally in regards to them...

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Old 03-13-2007, 09:14 PM
 
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I personally prefer having the waistband under my belly, instead of wearing an extra layer over my belly. So I generally wear the chemise top and then regular garments down low under my belly.

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Old 03-13-2007, 09:17 PM
 
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Wow... I have never considered wearing my bra over my g's... is that a normal thing? Of course, the thought of going without undies under my g's makes me feel creepy and naked... None of the women in my family wear their bras over thier g's either. I wonder who first thought of that?

My matron never discussed any of this either, was she supposed to? I've just sort of done what came naturally in regards to them...

~Valarie~
When I was endowed, my escorts and I went into a room and the matron went over how to wear the garment. Of course I'm only going by my own experience, and from what I know, you're supposed to wear your bra over the garment, since the garment should be closest to the skin. I've never encountered anyone wearing underwear or a bra under the garment regularly, though I've heard of some women who use pads that wear underwear during their period. Again, this is all from MY experience and observation (though I'm in Utah, so I've observed a lot) - I'm not sure if there's a specific "rule" or not
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Old 03-13-2007, 09:57 PM
 
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chiming in here. I've always worn a bra over my garments and of all those I've seen, including my mom, sisters, and a few roommates, I haven't seen anyone do it differently, but that's just my experience. Once when I was very first learning how to nurse, I thought it would be easier with the bra underneath. That lasted all of about 10 minutes. It's a sensation I just was not used to anymore, so I went back to the bra on the outside. Then I gave up on the nursing tops and nursing bras entirely and just lift everything up. I find it's much easier and a whole lot more discreet than carefully unclipping and finding the slot on the garments and so on. I've heard this is easier if you are smaller busted. And it allows some skin to skin contact.
When I was first endowed, I had to really figure out how to get the bottoms to stay in place while I pulled pants on. Until I did, they often bunched around the top, but I figured that as long as I was covered as much as they would have covered me, it was okay. I've since gotten a better handle on getting dressed but it did take some getting used to.
I didn't used maternity garments at all my first pregnancy because I didnt' get very big. Second time around I used the bottoms the last couple of months. We'll have to see what happens next time.
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Old 03-13-2007, 10:02 PM
 
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Then I gave up on the nursing tops and nursing bras entirely and just lift everything up. I find it's much easier and a whole lot more discreet than carefully unclipping and finding the slot on the garments and so on.
I no longer wear a nursing bra. I wear a formed-foam (not padded) bra from Target, and I pull the garment top and the bra down. It's probably best to do this with a cheap bra, as I imagine it's not too good for it

I detest the nursing tops. I have really sensitive skin, and the elastic drives me crazy. The chemise tops also have no lace around the sleeves, which I like. My skin is not a fan of the lace.
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Old 03-13-2007, 11:15 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Just out of curiosity, does anyone know where Mags disappeared to? She seems to have dropped off the face of the forum.

"A mind needs books as a sword needs a whetstone, if it is to keep its edge." - Tyrion Lannister

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Old 03-13-2007, 11:21 PM
 
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Just out of curiosity, does anyone know where Mags disappeared to? She seems to have dropped off the face of the forum.
So has LTB. I've wondered about her too.
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Old 03-13-2007, 11:30 PM
 
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I haven't seen either of them, but I usually only come here

I can't handle the nursing tops or pregnant bottoms. My babies would kick the elastic and it would drive me nuts! I just wear my regular bottoms with chemise tops, when I get too big for my regular tops. I wore ultra low rise pants my entire second pregnancy. It wasn't bad until he dropped, then it was just way uncomfortable and I just didn't do up the buttons

I also pull mine down to nurse and I don't use nursing bras. I do have a $40 Victoria's Secret bra. They've all held up really well I just didn't like looking like an old lady when I wasn't very full. Isn't this fun to do again?!

I think this is why the church has so many different materials and styles. Hopefully they can appease us a little bit I mean think about it, they used to all be one pieces. I've worn on once, and haven't since
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Old 03-13-2007, 11:40 PM
 
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Chiming in to say, both the temple prep class teacher and the temple matron said that bras, etc. should be worn over the garment, but it was OK to wear panties underneath when you're menstruating if it was easier/you felt comfortable. When I used cloth pads, they were the kind that snapped around panties, so that's what I did. I do just buy plain white panties and had to special-order plain white cloth pads -- everyone seems to love funky colours and patterns on their pads I think both the prep class teacher and the matron said that if you do wear anything underneath, it should be plain white. And anyone else I've talked to about it wears her bra over her garments. I don't think its something that someone would have first thought of at some point... it's simply part of wearing the garment against your skin, as it should be worn as much as possible.

I also do the cheap bra that I pull down to nurse thing. It helps that I'm petite in that area. It can get uncomfortable, though, and I wouldn't do it if I were engorged and/or thought there was any chance of a plugged duct happening from the pressure of the bra.

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Old 03-14-2007, 01:29 AM
 
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Ok, I'll chime in.

When I got married in 1989, I was told at the Dallas Temple that I could wear my G's however I wanted with my bra. It was no biggie. So, I chose to wear my bra under my G's. I tried over, but hated it. When I had first DS, I tried wearing the nursing bra under the G's, but it just didn't work with the flaps. It made my shirts look really weird with that bunch of material there. I tried leaving the bottom part under my bra, but that didn't help either. I when I nurse, my bra goes over my G's, and everyday when I put on my bra, I say to myself..."it won't be long, it's won't be long." I hate wearing them over my G's. And I like wearing pink/colored bras. : And I can't wait to not nurse anymore so I can start wearing strapless bras again. : I hope NCD isn't reading this.

My mom thinks I'm weird because I like wearing them under. And she tried and tried to convince me to change, but I told her no.

As for the chemise top, I wonder if that's what a lot of the younger generation are wearing, since Brisen says they are more "skimpy?" My mom says they have a real problem with a lot of young wives in their stake who wear low V neck-lines, and they wear G's. I told my mom that I know that some G tops do go down low. Like my nursing tops. They are a deep V. And I am wearing the right size. I can wear V neck shirts, and my mom thinks they are to low, but I haven't altered anything.

Before my sister quit wearing her G's, she hated the women bottoms, so she wore men's bottoms. Is that illegal? She said they were lots more comfortable. Is that true NCD?
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Old 03-14-2007, 01:39 AM
 
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Definitely will be a while until i understand all the talks going on the last few days, but wanted to say Dh gave his first talk on Sunday, which went very well, it was just a short talk about us finding the Church, and how we converted. In the shyness factor, I gave opening prayer in Sunday School, which was my first time ever giving prayer in public... I won't say i did well, but I was happy I could get over my shyness to do it, and really enjoyed sundays meetings, really feeling close to the spirit. Can't wait, almost at general conference, I really enjoy the talks.

Nancy, Mom to Kyra (2005), Zoe (2006), Callie (2007) (2008), and Xavier (2009)
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Old 03-14-2007, 01:56 AM - Thread Starter
 
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She said they were lots more comfortable. Is that true NCD?
Dunno. Never worn the female garments, so I don't have a frame of reference :

"A mind needs books as a sword needs a whetstone, if it is to keep its edge." - Tyrion Lannister

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Old 03-14-2007, 01:58 AM
 
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Hey Nancy!! That is awesome!! I know whenever I asked new members to say prayers in RS, they get all nervous and tell me they'll mess up, etc... I tell them that they will do great.

And just to let you know, I am super shy and nervous when it comes to speaking out loud. Maybe that's why I like "chatting" so much. I had to give a lesson in RS back in October, and it was the first time in 19 yrs that I have attended RS that I was asked to do a lesson. And in the 19 yrs that I have been an adult, I have spoken 1 time in Sacrament Meeting!! 1 time!! And I was so scared, that I didn't even do 1/2 my talk. I was done like in 5 minutes, and so after DH was done with his talk, we had like 20 minutes left!! I don't think the bishop was thrilled.
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Old 03-14-2007, 01:59 AM
 
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Dunno. Never worn the female garments, so I don't have a frame of reference :
:
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Old 03-14-2007, 02:05 AM
 
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After DH gave his talk in SM, a bunch of people came up after to say he did a good job they enjoyed it, whatever, but most of them followed it with"and you're next right?" To me... Where the shaking in your boots smilie, from someone who has to fight to make it out the house, or even open my "mouth" online when I am fighting depression, having the courage to go up and speak in front of everybody? I would have a lot of praying to do

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Old 03-14-2007, 02:40 AM
 
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Definitely will be a while until i understand all the talks going on the last few days, but wanted to say Dh gave his first talk on Sunday, which went very well, it was just a short talk about us finding the Church, and how we converted. In the shyness factor, I gave opening prayer in Sunday School, which was my first time ever giving prayer in public... I won't say i did well, but I was happy I could get over my shyness to do it, and really enjoyed sundays meetings, really feeling close to the spirit. Can't wait, almost at general conference, I really enjoy the talks.
Nancy-
Yay! Congratulations!!! We have lots of Hispanics and Marshalese here, and oftentimes they'll give testimonies or prayers in Spanish or Marshalese. It's so fun to hear new members give prayers and talks!
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Old 03-14-2007, 02:43 AM
 
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Wow... I have never considered wearing my bra over my g's... is that a normal thing?
When I took out my endowment in Dallas while in college (I think it was 1991) we were told that our bras go on the outside, and we could wear panties on the inside if menstruating and concerned about staining our garments.

When DH and I were sealed in 1996, again in Dallas, it was reiterated that the garment should be worn next to your skin at all times- and bras should go on the outside. I mention the two different occasions because there were two different matrons who told us this.

Then when one of my best friends took out her endowment last Fall, in the St. Louis temple, she was told to wear the garment on the inside next to her skin, bra over the garment. Just my experience .
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Old 03-14-2007, 02:50 AM
 
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Nancy, I'm sure when your time comes, you'll do awesome!!
So, I was endowed when I was 18 (3 years ago) and I have tried the "regular" tops and the chemise tops. I'm rather large busted, and the regular tops' "cups" are too small for me, so thus I only can wear the chemise tops. It has nothing to do with them being skimpier or anything like that. And you can pull the top of the chemise tops up a little bit so that they're higher above your bra, if you choose to, so that they are just as covering as any other style top. And I was told to always wear the tops underneath my bras! I never wore maternity garments, my regular ones stretched enough! I did wear nursing ones, but had a problem with all the elastic ripping on every single top I owned! So, next baby, I'm not sure if I'll bother, I'll probably just pull them down. I also wear the Petite bottoms (I'm 5'2'' in shoes!) and once they've been washed, they fall to about 2'' above my kneecap when I'm standing. But they fit fine directly at my waist. And the only fabric I can wear is the silky one! It makes me feel a little more feminine in the rather unattractive garments! Besides, the other fabrics tend to shrink! And not stretch as much!

Wife to D (12/03) and totally smitten Mama to DD (4/05) DS (2/09) and expecting DD#2  6/23/11
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Old 03-14-2007, 09:11 AM
 
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I love wearing garments. My bras don't chaffe and my underwear doesn't hike up, especially when wearing the drysilques with jeans. Aaaaah!

It's 5:00 am and Ihave insomnia and so I haven't been to sleep yet. One of the fun sides of OCD - I can't get bizarre scenarios out of my head and stay up worrying about things that haven't and may never happen. Hurray for Red Bull!
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Old 03-14-2007, 09:28 AM
 
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I'm sorry Alisa, if it makes you feel better, it's 7:30am here, and I haven't been to bed yet either b/c I work 3rd shift. And, to boot, my 1st shifter is late, she was supposed to be here by 7am. DD normally sleeps in till around 10:30-11am or so (she's a night owl) and the fact that I have to stay late is cutting into my nap before Isabel wakes up!
I'm sorry you can't sleep though! I have a special book reserved for such occassions, it about dream interpretation. I bought it like 6 years ago and still have not finished it, b/c every time I pick it up to read it, I fall asleep within a few pages!

Wife to D (12/03) and totally smitten Mama to DD (4/05) DS (2/09) and expecting DD#2  6/23/11
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