Mindful Parenting Book Club Part IV - Page 5 - Mothering Forums

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Old 02-26-2003, 12:03 AM
 
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Thanks, Breathe, we are pretty sure it's b/c I switched detergents - it just never occurred to me that Seventh Generation might cause a problem! But, it has, probably b/c of the Borax in it, which my DH also reacts badly to. You are missed, but it IS good that you haven't felt like being on the computer...wish I could say the same thing.

Analisa, Mama to Meg 12/12/01, Patrick 12/24/03, Catherine 12/24/03, Ben 2/26/06
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Old 02-26-2003, 12:26 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Is it just me or is this part of the book a lot of work to process? I'm so impressed with those that can stay focused and relate this stuff to their own lives. And I appreciate not being judged here when I am unmindful in my posts and in my life.

Breathe~I'm so glad you are being true to yourself and being wherever it is you need to be. Thanks for your honesty.

Analisa~Here's a big fat and some get better soon vibes to lil' Meg. Has she got her any of her molars yet? Ds just got one the other day and is working on more.

Mamak~Very thoughtful and mindful post! You are one of my mindful idols here! I can commiserate so well with the others but you are such an experienced and sweet AP mom and it shows!

Gotta go, mamas...
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Old 02-26-2003, 02:32 AM
 
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I think she's working on several molars but I can't get in her mouth well enough to be sure.

I had a few very nice mindful moments in the bath tonight after a really tough day. I just lied (lay?) there and breathed and felt the air going in and out of my nostrils. I had a book I wanted to read in the tub with me but I just focused on the breath and the warm water for a while first. Good for me!

Analisa, Mama to Meg 12/12/01, Patrick 12/24/03, Catherine 12/24/03, Ben 2/26/06
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Old 02-26-2003, 12:51 PM
 
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This is so hard for me. I really want to see people in a clear light. I had family who came to visit at the last minute. It was hard not to see them the way that I always do - with my same pre-conceived notions of who they are and what bugs me about them.

At what point can you just say - "these people are idiots - I am discerning this - not judging?" KWIM?

I have moved on in the book and have gotten into the chapters on birth and labor. Makes me want to have another baby and I have a 3 month old!

I've had some mindful moments with family in town. I found myself falling into the same controlling, directing role that I tend to fall into when my little borther is around. A good 5 times, I would say, I really managed to step back and just allow the situation to unfold and didn't tell everyone what to do or how to act. I actually was much more relaxed and I was severely sleep deprived.

Still struggling with mindless eating. I got this computer program that you can enter all the food that you eat into it - my fat grams are off the chart and my diet is not balanced. I need to focus on that. I think that I allow myself to eat to eat like crap as a "reward" for doing better in other areas. I need to find a different "reward" - any ideas?
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Old 02-26-2003, 04:38 PM
 
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Ig~ can you say, These people are not people I enjoy spending time with?

Heather, Yes I am listening ot this.

I am still working very hard, but I am also being mindful as much as I can. With DD especially. SHe is stressed out by my stress and I am finding it in myself to just be with her and my stress. And to just be with her tantrums (a result of feeling stressed I guess)
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Old 02-26-2003, 06:49 PM
 
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Hi all

Ig - I think that Jacqueline is right that it's ok to think negative thoughts about others. I think that if I take it one more layer and think about how people often act out of fear (our earlier discussion) and that maybe so and so's feeling a little insecure or vulnerable right now. It's hard to get out of self-reinforcing patterns of behavior with others, so just recognizing and being able to step back a few times seems like great success to me.

Sorry to hear about all the sad babies, the nugget and meg. Hugs to you both.

Thanks, mamakarata for your thinking about how you relate to your kids without straightjacketing them. I think the grades example is a really tough one. The social pressure/rewards/etc associated with grades is immense even if it's not pushed in the home. I'm wondering what she thinks about the grading system. I remember in school that I thought it was totally a game--a game that I knew to play well and that i sometimes enjoyed--but a game nonetheless and I tried to not let it get in the way of learning. But being "smart" was an important part of my identity that helped me deal positively with not being "pretty" or "outgoing." It's so tricky walking that line between accepting societal standards and challenging them. Uggh!

Hello to Breathe and Heather - just be where you are and take what you need. no pressure from us

I'm off to knit in a wine bar with some women tonight --whoop dee doo!. Have a great night, mamas!

Angie, Mama to Finn (6/01) and Theo (4/05)
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Old 02-26-2003, 06:56 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks, Angie! Have fun tonight. Ds is throwing up every fifteen minutes and is just very quiet acting and just needs to be held (with a towel or bucket handy). I called our midwife and she said since he is nursing not to worry too much. I'll be back later if he goes to sleep again this afternoon or when he goes to bed this eve...dh will be gone so I need to have some form of entertainment.
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Old 02-26-2003, 07:23 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Ds is asleep...for who knows how long. I'm trying to do some soul searching and I'm getting nothing that is helpful in regard to my judgments of people like ds and family members. But this chapter is very helpful in my perceptions with dh. We've been getting along very well since I have almost completely stopped seeing him like a fifteen year old and started to purposely notice things about him that make me feel good about him as a spouse and father to ds.

As fate would have it my theory about ds and climbing was tested today. Remember I said I'd rather help him climb instead of saying no b/c I didnt want him doing it when I wasnt looking. Well today he asked me to help him climb on the table which has become a fun thing for him lately. Well I said no not now, in a nice voice. Well five minutes later he did it all by himself while I was occupied in the next room. It worried me b/c we have a hard wood floor and a fall from the table would not be a good thing.

If DiaperDiva is lurking: I like your mindful eating thread you started a few days ago. I have thought about joining in but I think I have gotten enough practice this last six months to believe I dont need more reinforcements. But best of luck to you. We'll be cheering you on in your efforts. And best of luck to Analisa and Igaunavere in this regard as well.
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Old 02-26-2003, 09:39 PM
 
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Where is the mindful eating thread!!!!!!!??????
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Old 02-26-2003, 10:08 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Hi! Ds is a little better. Still throwing up every hour and he's on my lap so I better hurry. Iguanavere, here's DiaperDiva's Mindful Eating Log thread: http://216.92.20.151/discussions/sho...threadid=44109

After rereading it I dont think anyone is supposed to chime in with their own eating log. She just wants to try to keep herself honest. That's a brave thing to do.

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Old 02-27-2003, 02:17 AM
 
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Just chiming in to say I am still here, reading your posts nearly every day & just not posting lately. The thoughts of the past couple of days have been beautiful, thank you all.

I am stuck on this line:

"Being non-judgemental means that we are aware of those aspects of our own mind that are judging all the time, and that we intentionally suspend judgement and bring the mind back to observing the distinctions from moment to moment."

I do this.... almost never these days. But I am holding it ahead of me like a bit of a beacon. Reminds me of the spritiual truism that the desire to pray is a form of praying in itself, just the intent to draw near to God is a form of movement. I hope that on the roughest days my (our) intent to become more mindful of the present moment effects us on a deep level.

.... Even through hives and vomiting and family visiting and wisconsin snow and all the rest!!! Wow there is a lot going on right now. Heather I hope Holden has an okay night and you both get some rest. And that Meg feels better and anyone else in need of perking up.

hugs to all,
anne

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Old 02-27-2003, 04:31 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Good golly! We survived the night and ds just climbed on the table..... We're washing tons of laundry from yesterday...lots of stuff got vomited on. Gotta run....
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Old 02-27-2003, 11:01 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I've been doing a lot of thinking about discernment this week b/c of the chapter we are talking about. And it is helping me to realize some things about my parenting to ds. But I dont think this chapter is impacting me greatly. Just another window into the thought processes of earlier chapters/convos...like sovereignty and emapthy, etc. It's all so interwoven and very interesting stuff, gals. What I mean is this. Sometimes it is so easy to jump to a conclusion about ds's behavior and judge him. But b/c the relationship dh and I are building with him we are able to discern what is really going on. But we were already discerning long before we realized what the term "discernment" meant. KWIM?

Without a relationship built on empathy, compassion, and sovereignty (as much as possible anyhow) there would be no discernment. In my case I believe it would be one unmindful, thoughtless judgement after the next. Ya know? Like go to bed and stay in bed! It is naptime...end of story. Well instead it went like this today: After many attempts to get ds to nap when he was acting cranky today~Maybe you just arent in the mood to nap today. You have more important business to tend to since you missed out on so much fun yesterday b/c you were sick. Well 6:30 rolled around and he was acting like a dragon. So instead of judging and condemning "maybe you should have taken a nap and you would not be a crank right now" I tried to be patient and kind and lovingly put the sweet thing to bed. Of course now I have to go to bed a little bit earlier tonight too.

Thanks, Anne for the kind words and I'm glad to know you are still with us. I like that quote from the book too! I hope everyone is well and I'll be back tomorrow. And Jacq. I hope you didnt think I was being condescending earlier about if you were listening. I was definately feeling your pain.
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Old 03-02-2003, 12:29 PM
 
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So, on to the next chapter today, right? I haven't thought much about discernment/judging this week, or mindfulness much at all, because I was just trying to get through the week. The hives are gone, the cold is gone, things are looking brighter...

Oh, I just realized I was pretty mindful without trying to be! That's the goal, I guess, huh? I would just hold Meg and rock her, and stop cooking to play with her when she asked me to, etc. All pretty new stuff for me (at least, it's new for me to do these things w/o wishing I could be cooking or cleaning or whatever instead)...

Analisa, Mama to Meg 12/12/01, Patrick 12/24/03, Catherine 12/24/03, Ben 2/26/06
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Old 03-02-2003, 01:45 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Yes, Analisa, on to the next chapter. Yay!

Dh is still asleep cuz he babysat for some friends until 2am so I gotta go keep little one quiet. Happy, mindful thoughts to everyone!
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Old 03-02-2003, 06:36 PM
 
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Just stopping in to say 'hi'! I've definitely fallen off the wagon in this thread, but for good reason: I received two gift books recently that I've been craving for ages, both of them Buddhist practice books. Needless to say, I'm getting a little swamped in spiritual practice literature! I've stopped by the thread a couple of times, but I find myself so wound out from all the reading and study that I can't formulate a post. Oh well, whinewhinewhine ... At least I'm living mindfully in the midst of my studies.

I'll be here, quietly, and post some when I get some fresh energy. Take care all! Mamaste ~
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Old 03-02-2003, 06:59 PM - Thread Starter
 
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My posts are not always here but my thoughts often drift to you mamas and what we discuss (on or off topic). And when I do post here, I dont always feel like I am being very mindful in my posts . I often think of what I should have wrote only after I post something totally unrelated to our discussion. And sometimes let myself feel silly for it when I get really carried away. But in my mind I feel it is o.k. to get off topic at times if it helps to strengthen our bond here.

Here are a few bites from "Formal Practice" that I thought busy moms likes you and I relate to or have already mentioned and we can reaffirm some of this in our minds:

page 124~Solituded, time, by oneself, alone is an important form of deep sustenance for human beings...For parents, finding time for formal practice when we are not exhausted may feel virtually impossible at certain stages.

page 125~A quiet period of stopping does not have to be long...it could be for one or two minutes if that is all the time you can find...But there does not have to be a strong intention to make it happen, especially if we find meditation difficult or boring at first. Otherwise, we will fill up any "free" moments we might have with the newspaper or tv, or the radio, or some form of doing or "passing the time."

page 126~[about meditation]It's not supposed to feel relaxing, although it often can. There is no way in particular you are supposed to feel. Rather, you are just to be aware of how things actually are with you from moment to moment. So if you are feeling tense, you note that you are feeling tense, if angry, then angry; if dull or sleepy, then dull or sleepy. That's all. You just watch your own mind and your own body. No judgment is necessay. In fact, we are attempting to cultivate a non-striving, non-reactive, non-judgmental orientation toward our experience of any moment, just percieving and feeling what is here, and if possible, letting go of any tendency to attach personal pronouns to the feeling states.

Anyone out there still making or finding time for yoga and/or meditation? We know Mamak is doing karate.
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Old 03-02-2003, 07:10 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Oh, and it was good to hear from you, Mamaste. I'm thrilled that you are furthering your mindfulness expertise. I have found your knowledge on the topic very inspiring.

Analisa~I'm sorry if I stole a little thunder for this week from you...you are on for this week, but I am good at quoting and not always helpful in relating the book to my life. Maybe you and some of the others can continue with your wonderful wisdom. Maybe I will get better at articulating myself in that way. Some of my is due to the fact that ds has been waking up quite a bit at night the past month...molars are wreaking havoc and I am feeling the pain.

Angie, Cheryl, Karen, and Iguanavere~Thanks for your thoughts last week. I found them very interesting.

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Old 03-02-2003, 11:26 PM
 
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I'll jump in! hi all - I've been planning a tea party/baby shower and we had a tragic loss...a friend's baby died 7 days after birth. I've been devestated by this and have been trying to find the right things to say...the service is next week. It's hard to know what to say, or not say.

Formal Practice - Question: Finding time to be alone when you have 2 children under the age of 3? How does one do it? I haven't had any time alone except in the shower. I've taken to really enjoying the shower instead of sitting there and calculating how much money it take for a Haitian women to get clean water for her family and feeling guilty for luxuriating in the hot clean water.

other than that, I have been really good about finding the meditation in a lot of the small stuff, reading books, brushing teeth. I find that using a mantra (i am going to *gently* brush your teeth) helps.

OK - ds wants me to play - so I'm off - it's a meditation...
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Old 03-03-2003, 12:02 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Iquanavere~I'm so sorry about the loss of your friend's baby. What a sad sad sad thing to happen. I cant imagine how much pain I'd be in if I were the parents of that baby. I tried to find an article to help with this situation but I couldnt find one. I did find a thread that may help you though. There may be a new thread but I didnt see one. http://216.92.20.151/discussions/sho...&threadid=6346 May you be a blessing and source of strength to your friend.

Later mamas!
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Old 03-04-2003, 05:18 PM
 
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Still here and still very busy. Plus I need to figure out if I want to get another job or what. We are losing our grant in August so no pay for me unless we get another one. We might, but an associate position is supposed to be short term and I am not productive enought to make it as a senior scientist. So I have to think of what to do. Stay home??? It scares me...

But I am working mindfully LOL!
Still doing yoga about once a week and meditating for 15 minutes or here and there for a few minutes.
The time alone really is a big thing, and I tried explaingin to DH that in the bath I just don't want to be interupted. Lately DD has been getting up in teh night to play. Turns out I am not playful, so I am trying to decide if it is too cruel just to not play. She can be in bed with me, or not. She can play in her room, or not. But no trips to the kitchen for snacks and drinks, and I am not reading ehr any more books (can you imagine) What do you think? Too cruel?

Iguanavere ~ I am so sorry for the loss. What can you say to them except sorry and "I'm here if you want to talk, or cry" I hate it when people try to reationalize it KWIM. Well they only knew her for a few days, he was 90 years old blah blah blah... I would say, be mindful to them

Mamaste~ what books? If you don;t mind me asking.

Gotta work more
Love you guys, keep posting and I will try to give my thought about formal practice sometime soon. I have been treating the weekends like mini retreats. NO computer....
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Old 03-04-2003, 11:52 PM
 
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Oops I totally forgot it was my week so, um, thank you for stealing my thunder! I don't know how good I'll be b/c Meg is getting over a lonf cold & just gave it to me. It's funny, though, the quotes you picked are the exact ones I did, except I would have shortened them a bit... :P

Analisa, Mama to Meg 12/12/01, Patrick 12/24/03, Catherine 12/24/03, Ben 2/26/06
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Old 03-05-2003, 12:25 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Jacqueline~Sounds like you got a fork ahead in your road. Those big decisions are always kinda scary. August seems light years away for me with all the snow we are getting and cold as Canada temps today. May the force be with you, mama! I like your computer free weekends!

Analisa~I wondered where you were. : But I just figured you were busy settling in to your new home. Sorry you are not feeling well. Maybe we should just take the time we would have spent typing here this week and do some meditating? What do ya think? It fits with the chapter? Just take it easy and get better, mama. I'm glad you liked the quotes.

Iguanavere wrote~
Quote:
Formal Practice - Question: Finding time to be alone when you have 2 children under the age of 3? How does one do it? I haven't had any time alone except in the shower. I've taken to really enjoying the shower instead of sitting there and calculating how much money it take for a Haitian women to get clean water for her family and feeling guilty for luxuriating in the hot clean water.
Sounds like you found your meditating time in the shower. On page 124~"When you attend to your experience in this way, [mindful] as we have seen, your whole life becomes your meditation practice. I remember Mamak mentioning once that she can meditate while nursing. And several other moms have meditated in the bathroom. Were you talking about meditating time or just time alone? Time alone, uh, I rely on dh to give me lots of little baby breaks when possible or I go nuts.

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Old 03-05-2003, 01:50 AM
 
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I guess I was just talking out loud....yes, I am finding that if I can really take the time to focus on what is happening, what I am doing, life is so much easier.

But, I would still like some time to myself. Life is feeling monotenous....One of my children wakes up at 6 am and the day begins - if I'm lucky the other will stay asleep and the other one will go back to sleep and I might have an hour of quiet time. But I'm still on *call* so it doesn't feel like "my time". If both kids go to sleep by 8 pm, then I might have a couple of hours of "my time"....if dh is around.

I struggle with trying to negotiate free time with DH - I hate having to ask for help...

On a good note, I just figured out pumping, so I got about 8 oz out this evening in about 5 minutes....Yeah! So there is hope that I might be able to leave my little ones for an hour or so...
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Old 03-05-2003, 03:43 PM
 
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still here, and still meditating while breastfeeding. it has become his night time to bed routine and my "alone time"

so mostly, after he falls asleep, i put him in the side car crib and he sleeps for about 4 hours before he wakes to get in with us. but last night he slept for 7 1/2 hours! is this the beginning of his independence? or was it a fluke?

he's 15 mos now and i don't compare to other kids b/c by now, there are way too many variables-esp when there has been no effort to train him to sleep alone.

so for me, the co-sleeping concept has been a real mindful journey in that i have had no idea how it will play out. dh and i both agreed that we didn't want to seperate him from us until he is ready and we don't usually guess when that will be. i think b/c neither of us want to become attached to any outcome knowing it may not happen.

so having no plan for this has been a real letting go. and i do sometimes fear the outcome (usually quietly) b/c sharing that fear with those against co sleeping can be a mistake.

and then i go back to taking it day by day really enjoying the snuggle factor, and counting on the side car for the first part of the night to be able to stretch out w/dh.

i have been working on letting go of my attachement to the outcome of situations, and that has brought me the most success to being happy with my life i think. i think it goes along with the mindfulness, b/c letting go of the attachments means staying with the moment and not thinking too far ahead.

but i will say, this practice started for me about 10 years ago coming out of a hard relationship and trying to learn more about myself in relationships. it started with that and has taken me until the last few years to really see that it is playing out in my work, my parenting and my overall view of the world.

i think sometimes i come across as seeing things as oversimplified and "easy" because i shy away from negatives statements - even in my posts because i am being careful not reinforce the negative.

if i am struggling with something, i am working to state it to myself and others in a way that says what i am doing to make it better. and i it's funny, b/c i will find myself trying to find a struggle to share on this board, for fear that i am coming across as "little miss together".

and the thing of it is, i really am happy! i do have my struggles. i am still working on my patience w/my 12yo dd constantly, and with the ongoing balance of money, time, and energy. i don't have it all figured out, and yet, more and more, i feel like i do sometimes. and i have to ask, is that wrong?

i will actually go several days feeling gratitude and harmony in my life all the while, working, cleaning up, being late, balancing a check book that says i we have no money etc.

i don't know why i feel compelled to share this with everyone (who has actually read this far!) if you have, i hope this finds you grateful in your messy houses cleaning messy diapers, all sleep deprived and happy. i know, i know. i sound like a freakin nut case!
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Old 03-05-2003, 04:44 PM
 
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MK~you don't sound freaky at all. It has actually set me thinking. Meanwhile I am having to learn to get used to the uncertainty of outcomes and letting go of certain attachments too.

Well, I don't know if I want to say that last night was a fluke, but it is probably the start of something. And you are always still there for DS to fall back on.

DD starts in her own bed (in her room) and last night was the first time in a while that she really slept in our bed. Even after her midnight snack time and playtime, she always seems to want to go back to her bed. She goes to it and points at it and says "in seepeeeess" and when DH puts her in it she goes to sleep
Last night, no way, DH is all confused, and asked me now what do I do. After gnawing on my boob for a while she fell asleep...

OK, actual thoughts on fformal practice. I was supposed to go to a Zen center last night for a beginners meditation, but Dh didn't come home. I think now that I don't have the mindset for the last couple of days to do real meditation, I am trying to find little moments. Just a few minutes here and there. I think that is the real goal though isn't it. To be able to bring the mindfullness to every moment. And to be able to let you attachments and monkey mind go.
In the seminar on emotional intelligence, there was an anecdote about a company that did mindfullness training, and they noticed in MRI's or CAt scans )I can't remember which) that the activity in the area of the brain that was responsible for reactive feelings (especially anger) decreased. So the answer to the question whether really feeling your feelings actually decreases your anger level is YES! Haha, the science of mindfullness...,

Has anybody noticed anything about their minds? I noticed that my mind talks to itself. It can get very annoying actually now that I notice it. Hopefully I can get it to shut up. Problem is that I don't even think it is that interesting of a conversation....

I have to get back to the grind.

Strangely enough I am thinking of becoming a high school science teacher. And this came to me in a moment of mindfullness. The more I think about it the crazier it seems, and the more I feel about it the more that is what I want.

Finally, do you ever think your feelings? I niticed in my journal that I write a lot about think my feelings. It is the thinking mind still very prominent in myself...
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Old 03-05-2003, 05:26 PM
 
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Hi Everyone,

It's me -- the AWOL sister. I've been here and lurking, but not feeling like posting for a couple of reasons . . .

Much of the time I've been feeling like mamakarata -- Just really happy and centered and grounded, and not really seeing the need to read EB or come to MDC for support. (don't roll your eyes yet, keep reading!) We have pretty much killed our TV, I have done amazing amounts of decluttering in our home with relatively little pain, and dh and I have been back to our old best-friend status. I attribute practically ALL of this to the fact that after 3 months of HELL, ds cut 4 molars in 2 weeks and is finally sleeping again. And just a little sleep has turned my life around and I feel like a normal, happy, functional person.

I haven't even felt the need to go to yoga -- I've been that happy.

And then all of a sudden, WHAM! ds wakes up screaming every hour and it falls to pieces. Within moments (it feels like), I am depressed, it looks like a bomb went off in my house, I'm snippy with dh and feeling vey afraid of ds's toddler-ness. I've had several images of what's going on with me . . . one where I'm a balloon floating, actually being blown, all over the place with nothing connecting me to the ground. Another (from EB) where I'm the ocean and my surface is splintered into millions of little crashing waves, like what the water would look like if a helicopter were hovering over it.

So I try to be mindful (say to self:"Boy, I'm really feeling agitated today. I'm just really anxious right now. Let me BE with my anxiety/lonliness/overeating/exhaustion/fear, etc.") but it hasn't really helped me all that much.

And when I feel so out of control, I hate to come back and post like a downer. Besides the fact that there's really nothing new to say about how I'm approaching my life. Truth be told, when things are hard, they're just HARD for me.

But we had a fabulous night last night and I'm feeling easy again -- just living the roller coaster that is my life!

One good thing that has surfaced recently is my realization that I need to work on my spiritual self even when times are good and easy -- I need to cultivate my yoga PRACTICE (hint, hint, Eleanor!) so that it's there for me when I need it. So I'm working on that.

I'm sorry I can't speak about the book -- I suppose I will pick it up again one day soon -- but in the meantime, know that I'm here with you in spirit!

(Oh, and we're downgrading from cable access to a dial-up service, so it may be that the new slowness of my computer is the final straw in my surfing . . . we shall see!)

P.S. Jac -- the high school teaching sounds fabulous!!! Sounds like a calling to me!
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Old 03-06-2003, 12:00 AM - Thread Starter
 
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I've really been enjoying reading your posts today. I've been waiting for ds to go to sleep to post. Dh is watching some kiddos again this eve. I'm not going to attempt to respond to everything even tho' I really really want to. It would be so cool if we could chat over tea and cookies. And being at MDC makes me long for women like you to move into my neighborhood. A village of MDC families would be my dream, really.

I checked out a CD the other day at the library and it is making me feel so groovy and inspired this week. Dh, ds and I have been dancing around to it and having lots of fun. I want to share a few of the lyrics and CD with you through these links.

Words to “On Children” http://www.geocities.com/Heartland/9...n_Children.htm

Lyrics to “Circle Game” http://www.jmdl.com/lyrics/TheCircleGame.cfm

The CD is ~ “Hand in Hand: Songs of Parenthood” http://store.yahoo.com/melody/fonfacsizcol37.html
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Old 03-06-2003, 12:20 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Well, I am feeling so inspired by the book too. And inspired by your words too. I'm feeling inspired by the new Mothering magazine and by all those fighting for peace too.

One thing that struck me today was what Mamak wrote about trying to see the positive. Very great words of wisdom and worth trying to live. Latey I've noticed that there really are two ways of looking at the world. Tho' nothing is black and white or good vs evil. Those gradiations, remember? But even with dh lately I am trying to turn things I once saw as annoying into pluses about him. But good golly I feel today and so it is "easier" to put all this into practice.

O.k. I've been doing my yoga mostly every day lately...in the basement with ds or when dh is watching ds upstairs. And sometimes I am able to go to a yoga class at the Y. But I am also learning how to find little bits of time to meditate and breathe. Of course my minds wanders but the breath really does bring it back. And I notice where my mind wanders off to and where I am holding tension in my body. And it is so awesome to know I dont need to judge my thoughts.

Another cool thing that I noticed this week is that every week for the last 6 weeks dh and I have been reading a chapter in the book. And sometimes we read other chapters besides the one we are discussing here. Last night we read "The Family Bed" and the chapter about Toddlers. He used to pout a few months ago when I would suggest to read a chapter together but now he enjoys it. It leads to interesting convos between us.

Happy self discoveries to you all...
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Old 03-06-2003, 12:32 AM
 
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Hey, everyone - another AWOL (but lurking) mama here - I've been so busy, so unmindful at times and remarkably mindful at others, so stinkin' TIRED (we're working on molars here, too...) that I haven't had the energy to post. I sure think about you all a lot, though. I was trying to be meditative on my way home from work tonight, but monkey brain was alive and well. You're right, Jac - my brain has NOTHING interesting to say to itself. Ah, well. And PM me if you want to talk about the high school teaching idea.

Mamak - thanks for your post. We know that none of us has it figured out, but your posts are always really inspiring to this UN-mindful mama!!

Okay, nothing useful to say, just wanted to pop in and say hello. Heather - I'm with you - wish we could all get together IRL and chat over tea (any other tea junkies out there?)...

Love to you all!
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